NationStates Jolt Archive


All your marriage problems, solved?

Crabcake Baba Ganoush
02-09-2006, 16:50
Clicky (http://www.weeklyworldnews.com/features/sex/61285)


Well, not if you're currently married. I wholeheartedly agree with the motivation behind the program in question. Divorce rates are way out of control. It's getting to the point where its almost not worth the time and effort of getting married at all. For whatever the reason may be, people just aren't committing themselves like they used to.

Well now you don’t have to, that's right, now you don’t have to. You can take your commitments and throw them right out the window. Instead of Paying for a long and boring, not to mention expensive, ceremony and all the other expenses that go along with it. You just need to pay a nominal fee. There is absolutely no drawbacks and nothing at all to fear...well unless you're a divorce lawyer. So step right up and get yourself a rent a spouse


Catholic Church's plot to gain more members? (http://www.weeklyworldnews.com/features/religion/61536)

Well for a while now the Catholic church has been having trouble getting and keeping members. This new strategy might persuade more members to join their side, but there is one flaw in their plan. Eventually it may turn out that some member will stop going to church at all and get their confession needs taken care of in their new location. Eventually a new religious sect might even splinter off where religious services are guaranteed to be more fun and exciting.


New advances might make the War on Terror a cakewalk? (http://www.weeklyworldnews.com/features/politics/61725)

For all of you people out there who oppose the war because of all the people that are killed because of it, this story is for you. While the bulk of the article will better help American troops survive, the very end of the article describes our strategy that would help safeguard the lives of countless civilians
Naliitr
02-09-2006, 16:55
Hmm. Three topic conglomerate. Interesting. Anyways, I'm discussing the top one. Marriage is supposed to be spiritual, not something where you just decide "This wife sucks. I want a new one." any day of the week. It's supposed to be something where a bond is created, a spiritual and emotional bond. If companies are really willing to offer "Rental Husbands and Wives"...
Hispanionla
02-09-2006, 17:02
WTF?! Is it a real person or like a robot or something? I didn't really mind until I saw the part about rent-a-child...

Who would work there, other than really fat women who can't get laid any other way and will have a big RETURN TO SENDER stamp on their asses after the first hour?

Frankly, I prefer the customary "drive a while around at night and 'pick up' someone."

Cause at least there I know what I'm getting...
Dobbsworld
02-09-2006, 17:14
Ahh, the WWN. I shall forever fondly recall a column by one Ed Anger, entitled, "Pave the Stupid Rainforests!". It truly is to laugh.
Crabcake Baba Ganoush
02-09-2006, 17:15
Frankly, I prefer the customary "drive a while around at night and 'pick up' someone."

Cause at least there I know what I'm getting...

Oh...Do you customarily ask them what sexual diseases they might be carrying. Do you ask them what gender they were born with? Do you ask them if they had ever ridden the wooden horse, participated in bukakke, or other questions trying to ascertain their sexual freakiness? I could come up with a whole plethora of other questions but do you do all this before you get in the sack, or wherever else you agree on?

Just askin' :)