NationStates Jolt Archive

I've been enjoying toying with paradoxes over the past few days; kind of fun.

I'm sure a few of you have heard some of these:

"If you were to build a time machine to travel back in time to kill your great-grandfather before he met your grandmother, what would happen? First, you wouldn't be there to make the time machine. But then your ancestor would end up meeting your grandmother, so you will," and so on and so forth.

"If I were to ask you for one million dollars, would your answer to that question be the same as the question I'm asking you now?"
^This question is great. Ask a girl that, but substitute sex instead of money :p

"Moderation in all things. Including moderation."
I believe this was a classical philosopher, Greek or Roman who said that. Also a favorite of mine.

"Can God create something so heavy that he himself cannot move it?"

And this one, I came up with on my own:
Assuming Jesus's teachings were to follow the word of God, and the Bible is accepted as the word of God, then the word of God is to follow the teaching of Jesus.

Has anyone else got any good ones?

the one that baffled me is...

How can you look up the spelling of a word in a dictionary if you don't know how to spell it?

Can Jesus microwave a Burrito so hot, that even he couldn't eat it? ~Homer Simpson.

the one that baffled me is...

How can you look up the spelling of a word in a dictionary if you don't know how to spell it?

On a related subject. Ever watch those commericals where they have softwares, or stuff that can teach you how to read. Which is great, it's a great idea. What's stupid is sometimes they'll put letters with the phone #! Like 1-800-944-ABCD! lol!

the one that baffled me is...

How can you look up the spelling of a word in a dictionary if you don't know how to spell it?

Erm...well....Who uses dictionaries anymore? hehe

Thats a good one too.

I remember this one skit that was about The Terminator going back in time to save Jesus... sort of paradoxal. I think it was pretty funny...



...Wait, wait, it was MadTV, possibly the least funny comedy show ever... well there's Blue Collar TV *rambles on*

Greatest Paradox of all time:

If Chuck Norris punches himself in the forhead, which part of him feels pain first: His fist, or his forhead?

the one that baffled me is...

How can you look up the spelling of a word in a dictionary if you don't know how to spell it?

You Google it until you get the proper spelling, then look it up.

Greatest Paradox of all time:

If Chuck Norris punches himself in the forhead, which part of him feels pain first: His fist, or his forhead?

Fuck Chuck.

And it'd be his forehead... closer to the brain, faster transmission to the pain receptors.

Here's one I thought up while watching Jay Leno...

Will Head-on work on the headache you get from watching the Head-on commercial?

You Google it until you get the proper spelling, then look it up.

Sorry, didn't have Google when I was growing up. :D


Infact, didn't have PC's when I was growing up... :(

Sorry, didn't have Google when I was growing up. :D


Infact, didn't have PC's when I was growing up... :(

Are you sure the wheel was there too?

How about optical illusion as a sort of paradox? (At the very least, Wikipedia has a chain of articles: Optical Illusions (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Optical_illusion) -> Impossible Object (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Impossible_object) -> Paradox (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paradox) :D )

If so, one of my favorites: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Image:Illusion4.gif

Good Paradoxes...Anyone got them?
No, sorry. I only have bad paradoxes.

Fuck Chuck.

And it'd be his forehead... closer to the brain, faster transmission to the pain receptors.

Pray that Chuck doeth not hear thee.

If so, one of my favorites: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Image:Illusion4.gif
That's not a paradox, that's just an image that takes advantage of tiring rods. For a visual paradox, see a Mobius Strip.

Pray that Chuck doeth not hear thee.

STFU already. Those jokes got old the same day they got famous.

Are you sure the wheel was there too?

of course... they were hard on the feet tho...

here's a pic of our car.. with my dad and his best friend driving to work.
http://media-cyber.law.harvard.edu/blogs/static/ethicalesq/FlinstoneCar.gif

Can an alcoholic become too drunk to get drunk?

STFU already. Those jokes got old the same day they got famous.

THEY GOT FAMOUS?!?! :eek:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_paradoxes

My favorites:

Unexpected hanging paradox (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Unexpected_hanging_paradox)
The Ship of Theseus (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ship_of_Theseus)
Birthday paradox (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Birthday_paradox)
Newcomb's paradox (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Newcomb%27s_paradox)
The Grand Hotel (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hilbert%27s_paradox_of_the_Grand_Hotel)
Gabriel's Horn (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gabriel%27s_Horn)
Missing square puzzle (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Missing_square_puzzle)
Abilene paradox (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Abilene_paradox)
Kavka's toxin puzzle (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kavka%27s_toxin_puzzle)
Schroedinger's Cat (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Schr%C3%B6dinger%27s_cat_paradox)
Mere addition paradox (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mere_addition_paradox)
Diamond-water paradox (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paradox_of_value)

These are all paradoxes with an interesting story or implication, instead of the more boring mathematical and scientific ones.

That's not a paradox, that's just an image that takes advantage of tiring rods. For a visual paradox, see a Mobius Strip.

A Klein bottle (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Klein_bottle) would be better, but only then because most people are not accustomed to viewing four dimensional objects in only three. I don't see how a Mobius Strip qualifies as a paradox, however, as the explaination is rather elementary: the half-twist.

I've always liked Zeno's Paradox, but my real favorite is the Leap-Year Birthday Paradox from The Pirates of Penzance, as explained by the Pirate King ...

For some ridiculous reason, to which, however, I’ve no desire to be disloyal,
Some person in authority, I don’t know who, very likely the Astronomer Royal,
Has decided that, although for such a beastly month as February, twenty-eight days as a rule are plenty,
One year in every four his days shall be reckoned as nine and twenty.
Through some singular coincidence – I shouldn’t be surprised if it were owing to the
agency of an ill-natured fairy –
You are the victim of this clumsy arrangement, having been born in leap-year,
on the twenty-ninth of February;
And so, by a simple arithmetical process, you’ll easily discover,
That though you’ve lived twenty-one years, yet, if we go by birthdays,
you’re only five and a little bit over!

Republican common sense.

A podiatrist and a pediatrician walk into a bar . . .

A podiatrist and a pediatrician walk into a bar . . .
Ow! It was an iron bar! / You would have thought one of them would have seen it!

Hating hate?

A Klein bottle (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Klein_bottle) would be better, but only then because most people are not accustomed to viewing four dimensional objects in only three. I don't see how a Mobius Strip qualifies as a paradox, however, as the explaination is rather elementary: the half-twist.

I agree. Nonorientability only requires an additional dimension to manifest, it is not inherently paradoxical.

Hating hate?

Interesting thought! I've never considered the paradoxical nature of hypocrisy. Could "hating hate" be considered "justifiable hypocrisy"? Would that be another paradox?

Interesting thought! I've never considered the paradoxical nature of hypocrisy. Could "hating hate" be considered "justifiable hypocrisy"? Would that be another paradox?

You stop. You makey my brain hurt:(

You stop. You makey my brain hurt:(

Sadly, I also make my own hurt quite frequently ;)

This is a good one, actually.

Anyone who posts this : http://www.albinoblacksheep.com/flash/youare.php

This is a good one, actually.

Anyone who posts this : http://www.albinoblacksheep.com/flash/youare.php

Is redundancy paradoxical now?

Is redundancy paradoxical now?
Yes.

The Grandfather Paradox.

A Klein bottle (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Klein_bottle) would be better, but only then because most people are not accustomed to viewing four dimensional objects in only three. I don't see how a Mobius Strip qualifies as a paradox, however, as the explaination is rather elementary: the half-twist.

Hey, shut it. I was just making an example, and that was the first paradoxical object I could think of.

How can you demonstrate to a conservative that your source is not biased if he considers all evidence of its impartiality to be evidence of a bias?

(it doesn't work the other way around, because the things that liberals complain are biased tell outright lies which are easy to prove.)

"If you were to build a time machine to travel back in time to kill your great-grandfather before he met your grandmother, what would happen? First, you wouldn't be there to make the time machine. But then your ancestor would end up meeting your grandmother, so you will," and so on and so forth.
[/QOUTE]

You would create an alternative universe, where you're future self does not exist, but you would still exist in your original universe.

[QUOTE]
"If I were to ask you for one million dollars, would your answer to that question be the same as the question I'm asking you now?"


Yes.


"Moderation in all things. Including moderation."


Two sets of moderators, moderating each other. (not sure if that makes sence)


"Can God create something so heavy that he himself cannot move it?"


Ahh now this one is interesting. It really depends on what type of God you are talking about. However for the Abrahamic God, it actually says he has "all power". However not even an infinate of power can do that paradox, so god can not do that.


And this one, I came up with on my own:
Assuming Jesus's teachings were to follow the word of God, and the Bible is accepted as the word of God, then the word of God is to follow the teaching of Jesus.


Jesus's teachings are the word of God as he is God.

That was my feeble atempt to debunk those paradoxes. :D

Always be sincere, whether you mean it or not.

OK it's not exactly a paradox but 'tis a fun one anyway.

Two sets of moderators, moderating each other. (not sure if that makes sence)


Sort of like if Katganistan and Tactical Grace started fighting?

Sort of like if Katganistan and Tactical Grace started fighting?

Hydesland said two sets, so I think you'd need at least 4 mods . . .

Hydesland said two sets, so I think you'd need at least 4 mods . . .

Nope. You can have a set of one... If I remember Stat properly...

The individual is not trusted to govern him or herself and yet we trust govenrments of individuals to do so. That seems like a paradox to me.

Nope. You can have a set of one... If I remember Stat properly...

If we're going to be mathematically rigorous, then we could also have none ;)

All Cretan men are liars.

I am a Cretan man.

¬_¬

when you speak in absolutes you are always wrong. ;)

that's my favorite.

All Cretan men are liars.

I am a Cretan man.

That's no paradox. It could be that some Cretan men, including yourself, were liars, while some Cretan men did tell the truth.

"Can God create something so heavy that he himself cannot move it?"


Logically speaking, if an almigthy God exist then He/She/It would not be limited by logic. :D