NationStates Jolt Archive

TRUE AMERICANS PRAISE WALL

August 10, 2006

SAN DIEGO, CA - As construction of the Great Wall of America began Wednesday, throngs of joyful American-born citizens paraded in celebration of the historic event. "This is a great day for America," self-proclaimed 'Minuteman' John Smith said, while holding a sign proclaiming "Lern english u stoopid mexikins". "Our way of life is threatened by these foreigners. They come in here, steal our best fruit-harvesting and trash-collecting jobs, and on top of that, they expect us real Americans to learn their language."

The Wall itself, intended to keep the enormous influx of illegal immigrants from entering the United States, is expected to completely halt the flood, which is currently holding steady at a rate of twenty-five billion per day. "Nuestra infraestructura no puede manejar simplemente esta carga," said minimum wage-earning construction foreman Jose Martinez.

However, the Wall's designers have even bigger plans.

"Immigration is not only a problem between the United States and Mexico," said key policymaker Rudolph Jones. "In addition, there are boatloads of Chinese and Koreans coming in from the Pacific, Arabic terrorists from over the Atlantic, and your occasional Vietnam-era draft-dodger trying to sneak back in from Canada." He went on to state that their "initial" goal was to entirely enclose the continental US. "It's obvious that we cannot stop at even such a drastic juncture," Jones continued. "As our neighbors continue to plot their sinister invasions, soon enough the idea of catapaulting themselves in will surface. We must have a ceiling as well as a wall."

Smith added, "It's time to take America back for those who were here first: us white folk."
The above is a work of satire. See my signature for more information.

*tries to sneak away*

Onion?

A little late.

My father came from Korea right after the Korean War, and promptly seduced a "white woman". Resistance is useless... you will be assimilated...

not to mention I've mated successfully with two more women...

hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!

Onion?
No, all me (although they may have done something similar) ... what do you think?

I wish I could write for the Onion.

No, all me (although they may have done something similar) ... what do you think?

I wish I could write for the Onion.It sounded a bit more vicious than anything I'd read in the onion before. Also make it a bit longer. :)

Include some mention of a roof. Otherwise, good. EDIT: Oh, shoot, it's there already.

It sounded a bit more vicious than anything I'd read in the onion before. Also make it a bit longer. :)
Maybe it could be one of the short pieces.

I wonder whose building the wall?

and I wonder how many Americans will starve when there are no "stoopid mexikins" to harvest the crops and where will the exotic hookers come from...Alaska?

I wonder whose building the wall?

Mexicans, but they'll build it from the outside. There'll be a tunnel between the mainland and Alaska and Hawaii. Guam is screwed, all they're going to get is the TV signals. That's what they get for not being a real state.

I personally like my plan to make Mexico its own continient, all we need is about a thosand hydrogen bombs and a series of holes two miles deep along the border.
A hundred years from now, there will be a radioactive lake between the US and Mexico, so the only Mexicans who DO get across will have more limbs, and can work harder, and will help to create the race of Ubersenoirs.

Mexicans, but they'll build it from the outside. There'll be a tunnel between the mainland and Alaska and Hawaii. Guam is screwed, all they're going to get is the TV signals. That's what they get for not being a real state.
What about Puerto Rico?

What about Puerto Rico?
They are not a real state either, but probably will get a tunnel to the Virgin Islands and basic cable.

http://i83.photobucket.com/albums/j315/crashcow/NSG/wall.jpg

http://i83.photobucket.com/albums/j315/crashcow/NSG/wall.jpg
Winrar!

And once the wall is done, the US and Canada will join together to form 'The Kingdom of Mexico Sucks'.

And once the wall is done, the US and Canada will join together to form 'The Kingdom of Mexico Sucks'.
I wouldn't go counting those chickens quite yet there...

I wouldn't go counting those chickens quite yet there...
TERRORIST!

A little late.

My father came from Korea right after the Korean War, and promptly seduced a "white woman". Resistance is useless... you will be assimilated...

not to mention I've mated successfully with two more women...

hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!


good for you....i love success stories,especially rag's to riches type.

i am all about immigration as my grandparents,respectively, literally came off the boat from italy and ireland.
my irish gp's had a rudimentery grasp of english(thats american english..lol)but my italian gp's spoke english in the world and italian at home.
had many 7 coarse dinners with them and never understood a word...but when we went to the store..they spoke adequately enough to be understood.english that is.

most importantly,and everyone can mock or be sarcastic about xenophobic americans....but they came here legally!
they went thru the process,they paid taxes,they contributed to this country,not sucked off the government teet,sent what they made home and collected free medical,housing,welfare..all on the taxpayers back.

go ahead and be smug...the simple fact is that the illegal people that come here..may want to make a better life for themselves(god bless them)but they ARE coming here illegally,are not paying into the system,they are draining services,and it is not fair to the people that came before legally,and assimilated into the culture.

when i grew up,there was latins,jews,italians,irish,polish..you name it..all in the same community,all working,all here legally,all contributing to the community.

now they stay in pockets(visit a city)collect welfare and benefits provided by people that contribute...send home the money they make so they can bring more of their families over..illegally.
and suck more from the system.

i am sure all the america haters think that is just great,we are getting fucked over..woohooo

but i will say,my gp's were discrimminated and held down by the wasps,but they came here legally,worked hard and became part of the community..thru honest work.
how quaint

not to say the the illegals here cant contribute,or all are just leeches...but to mock our country for trying to secure the borders during a time of war,and economic troubles...is bullshit.

people that mock us
sound to me like jealous little schoolyard twits...gleefully watching the person they are jealous of,getting hurt by any asshole..just as long as the person they are jealous of gets hurt.

that smallminded vindictive,shallow and jealous mentality...pushes more and more openminded people like myself towards isolationism....fuck you all type attitude.

build a fricken wall...starving,drought,famine,holocost,tough luck for you.

we could save billions not helping people.

better yet..why not send cruise ships to mexico from europe to import all the illegals that are coming here....seeing as we are redneck bigots and all...and your all enlightened and altruistic.

then you can get the "cheap labor"

you will find the cost to the community is not cheap...when you factor in the gangs,drugs,medical care,the 1 guy working with 6 kids and a wife on welfare,forget the guy is paid under the table and does not pay taxes...and then sends his loot home to bring other family members to your country for some more freebies.

go right ahead...put your money where your smug ass mouth is...till then...stfu about another country trying to secure it's own border.

man i hate kneejerk liberals,almost as much as i hate kneejerk neocons.


this was not directed to anyone in particular...especially dk,i went off on a rant..sorry.

i am just sick of people correctly pointing their crooked fingers at the us for butting into other countries biz...yet have no problem butting in to ours,when they have no clue what we are dealing with..their sole motivation is a hatred or disdain for america or our success.
and want nothing more to see us dragged down.

i suppose that is inevitable...like people drooling over mel gibson fucking up...or any star..we love to see the mighty fall...how openminded and enlightened...lol

like i said...for supposed openminded people..liberals are no different then a shunned little dick in the schoolyard...completely right,and completely WRONG

sucks that immigrants are living in a country they want to leave...to come here...but what sucks more is that supposed openminded people...mock the u.s. for securing the borders,not because it hurts the illegals(if you care so much...send a ship)but only because it hurts the u.s.

pathetic...

and dont kid yourself..we are lambasted for securing the borders,not for logical reasons,but because secretly,they want to see us hurt.

i bet most that mock us,do so not because of their deep concern for illegals,but more for their hope we get kicked in the shin...again..schoolyard pathetic...

grow up.

TERRORIST!
http://americaohyes.com/koontzimages/koximages/greatest.jpg








*Dobbs to mothership*

Mauve alert, repeat mauve alert. Type 'D' humaniform has
detected our presence in sector 12. Awaiting suggestions, over.

http://americaohyes.com/koontzimages/koximages/greatest.jpg








*Dobbs to mothership*

Mauve alert, repeat mauve alert. Type 'D' humaniform has
detected our presence in sector 12. Awaiting suggestions, over.

interesting...my bet is that your a 20 year old kid living at home...not that there is anything wrong with that.

just like someone once said..if you aint a liberal in your 20's then you got no heart...true....if you aint conservative in your 30's you got no brain.

myself...i am now past all that..i am officially.......me

bet you can google the quote and prove me wrong....lol....hahaha

myself,i understand the meaning...i don't need google to tell me things i learned 20 years ago.

this is not a personal thing..i actually like your take on alot of things....kinda contradictory..eh

I wish I could write for the Onion.
As funny as they are, they're real snitty with their fanbase. Their official policy is that they are a one-way conduit of information, end of story. They won't even read your letters, much less respond to them. And fan submissions? Forget it.

Meh. Maybe that's what's kept them so good over the years...

interesting...my bet is that your a 20 year old kid living at home...not that there is anything wrong with that.
Well, no points scored so far.
just like someone once said..if you aint a liberal in your 20's then you got no heart...true....if you aint conservative in your 30's you got no brain.
Which just goes to show you shouldn't put an undue amount of stock in trite soundbytes.
myself...i am now past all that..i am officially.......me
Congratulations on your being officially you. Were you unofficially you in the past, or were you officially somebody else - ?
bet you can google the quote and prove me wrong....lol....hahaha
Bet you I won't bother.
myself,i understand the meaning...i don't need google to tell me things i learned 20 years ago.
Good on you - guess you're still in possession of enough unpickled brain cells to forego a course of remedial studies.
this is not a personal thing..i actually like your take on alot of things....kinda contradictory..eh
What a relief it is knowing I'm being slagged in a strictly impersonal manner. Go me.

go ahead and be smug...the simple fact is that the illegal people that come here..may want to make a better life for themselves(god bless them)but they ARE coming here illegally,are not paying into the system,they are draining services,and it is not fair to the people that came before legally,and assimilated into the culture.

1) You say that as if you are the most perfect law abiding citizen.
2) A calculator isnt fair to the people who had to use abacus.

1) You say that as if you are the most perfect law abiding citizen.
2) A calculator isnt fair to the people who had to use abacus.
Abaci aren't fair to people who count on their fingers, either.

Onion?

Fried with Ranch dressing on the side?

A little late.

My father came from Korea right after the Korean War, and promptly seduced a "white woman". Resistance is useless... you will be assimilated...

not to mention I've mated successfully with two more women...

hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!

Polygamist!

What about Puerto Rico?

They might join Cuba now that Castro is on his way out. :p They couldn't stand the economic implications of Mexico taking over the US. :eek:

What about Puerto Rico?

They might join Cuba now that Castro is on his way out. :p They couldn't stand the economic implications of Mexico taking over the US. :eek: