NationStates Jolt Archive

There are so many different topics discussed on NS I have never seen a thread about bullying. Just wondering what peoples views, experiences and thoughts were. Personally I have never been bullied apart from the odd bitching campagins against me, but I think most teenage girls go through that.

My little sister however has been tramatised by bullying at the age of 4 by one of her classmates. Incidently it was a teacher's son who was acting 'boisterous' even though he hit her over the head with a glass bottle, hit and kicked her, pulled her pants down in the middle of the yard (it was her second week of school, she was 4 years old), got his older brother to throw a ball full force at her. Nothing was done about this. The school covered it up, lied to the Department of Education about it.

As I live in a rural area our entire family suffered (nothing like my sister). We had tyres slashed, been tailgated, I have been followed by a car while walking to work. The list is endless really. Just curious is this a once off or have others gone through this?

Schools let this go unless someone gets really hurt. Probably they don't want a negative image of the school so things get brushed under the carpet.

There are so many different topics discussed on NS I have never seen a thread about bullying. Just wondering what peoples views, experiences and thoughts were. Personally I have never been bullied apart from the odd bitching campagins against me, but I think most teenage girls go through that.

My little sister however has been tramatised by bullying at the age of 4 by one of her classmates. Incidently it was a teacher's son who was acting 'boisterous' even though he hit her over the head with a glass bottle, hit and kicked her, pulled her pants down in the middle of the yard (it was her second week of school, she was 4 years old), got his older brother to throw a ball full force at her. Nothing was done about this. The school covered it up, lied to the Department of Education about it.

As I live in a rural area our entire family suffered (nothing like my sister). We had tyres slashed, been tailgated, I have been followed by a car while walking to work. The list is endless really. Just curious is this a once off or have others gone through this?That's not bullying. Bullying is when 5 year old boys or girls decide to mock and beat up a member of the same sex (usually) in a way that might leave bruised egos, but probably not bruised physically. Hitting someone with a glass bottle is not acceptable at all. Hitting someone with a glass bottle can kill them. I don't know if the bully was smart enough to know that, because when I was younger I remember someone trying to throw a plastic bag over my head (the way that causes suffocation) and a lot of times the person doing the act doesn't realize that what they're doing could be lethal....

Anyway, sue the bastards. The school and the family. Not for the bullying, for the harrasment and the slashed tires.

There are so many different topics discussed on NS I have never seen a thread about bullying. Just wondering what peoples views, experiences and thoughts were. Personally I have never been bullied apart from the odd bitching campagins against me, but I think most teenage girls go through that.

My little sister however has been tramatised by bullying at the age of 4 by one of her classmates. Incidently it was a teacher's son who was acting 'boisterous' even though he hit her over the head with a glass bottle, hit and kicked her, pulled her pants down in the middle of the yard (it was her second week of school, she was 4 years old), got his older brother to throw a ball full force at her. Nothing was done about this. The school covered it up, lied to the Department of Education about it.

As I live in a rural area our entire family suffered (nothing like my sister). We had tyres slashed, been tailgated, I have been followed by a car while walking to work. The list is endless really. Just curious is this a once off or have others gone through this?

ooh thats nasty.

i suppose im lucky that that has never happened to me,

ps i hope your sister is alright

That's not bullying. Bullying is when 5 year old boys or girls decide to mock and beat up a member of the same sex (usually) in a way that might leave bruised egos, but probably not bruised physically. Hitting someone with a glass bottle is not acceptable at all. Hitting someone with a glass bottle can kill them. I don't know if the bully was smart enough to know that, because when I was younger I remember someone trying to throw a plastic bag over my head (the way that causes suffocation) and a lot of times the person doing the act doesn't realize that what they're doing could be lethal....

Anyway, sue the bastards. The school and the family. Not for the bullying, for the harrasment and the slashed tires.

We can't, there is no direct proof for the tyres and its mine and my mothers word against the local principal, teachers and priest.

We can't, there is no direct proof for the tyres and its mine and my mothers word against the local principal, teachers and priest.

doctors report? The bottle would have left a mark

doctors report? The bottle would have left a mark
And the ball.

There are so many different topics discussed on NS I have never seen a thread about bullying. Just wondering what peoples views, experiences and thoughts were. Personally I have never been bullied apart from the odd bitching campagins against me, but I think most teenage girls go through that.

My little sister however has been tramatised by bullying at the age of 4 by one of her classmates. Incidently it was a teacher's son who was acting 'boisterous' even though he hit her over the head with a glass bottle, hit and kicked her, pulled her pants down in the middle of the yard (it was her second week of school, she was 4 years old), got his older brother to throw a ball full force at her. Nothing was done about this. The school covered it up, lied to the Department of Education about it.

As I live in a rural area our entire family suffered (nothing like my sister). We had tyres slashed, been tailgated, I have been followed by a car while walking to work. The list is endless really. Just curious is this a once off or have others gone through this?

I was on tele when I was 13 because there was a boy in my school that 'bullied' me. Some TV show was doing a special onbullying in schools, and my school offered me and this lad up for interview.

The thing is, he only picked on me because he fancied me, but he'd hit me, and throw stuff at me, and call me names and stuff, just because I wouldnt go out with him. He pulled my chair out from under neath me in art one day and I landed on my coxic bone and couldn't walk properly for week. (Two of the other lads who I was friends with beat him up)

That's bullying, but it's not sever and it's not to the extent that I've seen it happen in school.

There needs to be an awareness in schools and they need to have a program of confidence where kids can go and talk to someone about it and try and get help. (I think they're doing this already).

It's very easy for people to say 'just stand up to them', but for some kids it's not that easy, although it's often the best thing to do, because they tend to stop.

what kind of parents do you have that are letting this stuff go on?

what kind of parents do you have that are letting this stuff go on?

Mine made me start karate :/

but i loved it :D

I've never been bullied to the extent that your sister has. I wish you and your family the best of luck in bringing the bully to justice, if possible. Even if he never hurts your sister again, that child will go on to hurt and harass other children, especially if the parents at least condone the behavior.

I have been bullied at school, but it hasn't gone beyond name-calling, which does hurt. Luckily, however, the stupidity of the bullies can usually be used as an advantage to make them stop it when it is only name-calling.

In 7th grade, I was called a ghost by two girls day after day. They would ask me why I don't just go to a tanning bed or lie out in the sun for a few hours so that I could be tan like everyone else apparently is in Florida. I happen to like my pale complexion, so I finally came up with a way to make them stop.

The next time they came to pester me about my skin, I said, "The UV radiation index is too high in this region."

This stopped them in their tracks, and they replied, "We're not science freaks, so we don't know what radiation is." I thought, "More like not likely to do well in science. Radiation is on the list of science terms that everyone should know. Well, everyone who intends to pass." Of course, I didn't say that though. I'm not a bully, and I had the satisfaction of being victorious, and, better yet, of being victorious without being hurtful.

Another time, a random person came up to me and started asking me potentially embarassing and annoying questions. It didn't really get to the level of bullying, though, because I had a strategy in mind. Instead of answering the questions, I asked something to the effect of these questions, "Why are you asking me these questions?"

"Because my friend asked me to."

"And why, pray tell, does your friend want to know?"

"Because she's stupid."

"If she's stupid, then is there really any point in asking me these questions?"

"Um, I guess not." Then she walked away, and I had won.

Once someone took my backpack and moved it somewhere else. I never found out who did, so I don't know if it was an act of bullying or a random prank. But it was serious, and I had to get the administrators to help me find it.

Once I was having a sort-of-conversation with someone the way I'm apt to do out of shyness: they were talking, and I responded with nods or shakes of my head or, if necessary, with pantomime. After a while, the person had the nerve to ask me if I was mute! I had half a mind to just shake my head and say nothing, but instead I said, "No, I am capable of talking." And thus the fun but unusual conversation turned to silence.

Now that I think of it, though, it did escalate to physical bullying once, in high school. Someone tripped my at the bus loop, so that I fell onto the
asphalt and tore up both knees of my pants. Both knees and one of my elbows were scraped up. I still managed to catch my bus, and my friend's dad treated the scrapes, which stayed there for quite a long time.

I reported it to the clinic as an accident the next morning, because I hadn't seen anyone trip me, and at that point I had no clue that my injury was someone else's fault. However, at the end of the day, a classmate of mine who I knew was there when he fell because he had asked me if I was all right,told me that he had seen someone intentionally trip me.

Sorry that this is so long!

There are so many different topics discussed on NS I have never seen a thread about bullying. Just wondering what peoples views, experiences and thoughts were. Personally I have never been bullied apart from the odd bitching campagins against me, but I think most teenage girls go through that.

My little sister however has been tramatised by bullying at the age of 4 by one of her classmates. Incidently it was a teacher's son who was acting 'boisterous' even though he hit her over the head with a glass bottle, hit and kicked her, pulled her pants down in the middle of the yard (it was her second week of school, she was 4 years old), got his older brother to throw a ball full force at her. Nothing was done about this. The school covered it up, lied to the Department of Education about it.

As I live in a rural area our entire family suffered (nothing like my sister). We had tyres slashed, been tailgated, I have been followed by a car while walking to work. The list is endless really. Just curious is this a once off or have others gone through this?


This is criminal behavior. If no one in your town will do anything, go to the state. Talk to a lawyer. Talk to newspapers.

And if someone continues to tailgate, either keep going slower and slower and slower, or hit the brakes. Let them explain in a police report why they could not stop. Their insurance should love that, too.

Is there a family member young enough to be in the school? Having them crack the older kid with a book or lunchbox might give the family a clue.

Don't think we haven't. Children have no rights in Ireland, its terrible. My sister is better now. Not completely, but she's getting there. She was moved schools but most of the girls in her class are horrible, not just to her they're that way to everyone. But she took up Karate which she loves, and has gotten a new puppy recently and is starting to show him He's won a bit so that gives her confidence, which is what she really needs.

I remember signs in BT offices in the UK (especially in the men's lavatory) which mentioned anti-bullying policies and programs.

I was rather shocked, as bullying does not seem to occur in the white collar workplaces I've been in (in the US). It's a schoolground phenomenon in the US (and a classic part of growing up, unless it's really bad).

I've never, ever seen it at work. But apparently, it's a big problem in the offices in the UK - enough for them to try to stop it.

I've never been bullied to the extent that your sister has. I wish you and your family the best of luck in bringing the bully to justice, if possible. Even if he never hurts your sister again, that child will go on to hurt and harass other children, especially if the parents at least condone the behavior.

I have been bullied at school, but it hasn't gone beyond name-calling, which does hurt. Luckily, however, the stupidity of the bullies can usually be used as an advantage to make them stop it when it is only name-calling.

In 7th grade, I was called a ghost by two girls day after day. They would ask me why I don't just go to a tanning bed or lie out in the sun for a few hours so that I could be tan like everyone else apparently is in Florida. I happen to like my pale complexion, so I finally came up with a way to make them stop.

The next time they came to pester me about my skin, I said, "The UV radiation index is too high in this region."

This stopped them in their tracks, and they replied, "We're not science freaks, so we don't know what radiation is." I thought, "More like not likely to do well in science. Radiation is on the list of science terms that everyone should know. Well, everyone who intends to pass." Of course, I didn't say that though. I'm not a bully, and I had the satisfaction of being victorious, and, better yet, of being victorious without being hurtful.

Another time, a random person came up to me and started asking me potentially embarassing and annoying questions. It didn't really get to the level of bullying, though, because I had a strategy in mind. Instead of answering the questions, I asked something to the effect of these questions, "Why are you asking me these questions?"

"Because my friend asked me to."

"And why, pray tell, does your friend want to know?"

"Because she's stupid."

"If she's stupid, then is there really any point in asking me these questions?"

"Um, I guess not." Then she walked away, and I had won.

Once someone took my backpack and moved it somewhere else. I never found out who did, so I don't know if it was an act of bullying or a random prank. But it was serious, and I had to get the administrators to help me find it.

Once I was having a sort-of-conversation with someone the way I'm apt to do out of shyness: they were talking, and I responded with nods or shakes of my head or, if necessary, with pantomime. After a while, the person had the nerve to ask me if I was mute! I had half a mind to just shake my head and say nothing, but instead I said, "No, I am capable of talking." And thus the fun but unusual conversation turned to silence.

Now that I think of it, though, it did escalate to physical bullying once, in high school. Someone tripped my at the bus loop, so that I fell onto the
asphalt and tore up both knees of my pants. Both knees and one of my elbows were scraped up. I still managed to catch my bus, and my friend's dad treated the scrapes, which stayed there for quite a long time.

I reported it to the clinic as an accident the next morning, because I hadn't seen anyone trip me, and at that point I had no clue that my injury was someone else's fault. However, at the end of the day, a classmate of mine who I knew was there when he fell because he had asked me if I was all right,told me that he had seen someone intentionally trip me.

Sorry that this is so long!


Don't be sorry! I hope your ok now. That was the whole point of this thread just to find out if others have experiences of bullying and if they were badly affected how did they get over it.

mmmm office workers in the UK are so much bitchier than their American counterparts...different cultures I guess....

I, myself, was bullied for 14 years and it did nothing to me cept make me stronger now so I guess perhaps I should be grateful in a weird way. Sucked at the time though (obviously)

14 years? Office Bullying is occurs quite regularly in Europe. I was always under the impression it happened more so in the US.

I remember signs in BT offices in the UK (especially in the men's lavatory) which mentioned anti-bullying policies and programs.

I was rather shocked, as bullying does not seem to occur in the white collar workplaces I've been in (in the US). It's a schoolground phenomenon in the US (and a classic part of growing up, unless it's really bad).

I've never, ever seen it at work. But apparently, it's a big problem in the offices in the UK - enough for them to try to stop it.


Yeah, we have quite a culture of it. One of the main problems is the school system, really. Schools generally refuse to acknowledge that they have any problem at all- in fact, many headteachers will say that their school has no bullying at all, in clear denial of complaints from parents and pupils, as well as actually witnessing violent incidents of bullying. Advice from teachers on how to deal with bullies is almost always "just ignore it and it will go away", or the classic "stand on your own and glare at them, and they leave you alone" approach, the first of which is stupid and only given to help teachers in their denial of the problem, and the second of which is like painting a target on your face. Although standing up to the bullies can work, teachers will always take the side of the group against the individual, and bullies hunt individuals in packs.

My personal theory is that this goes with the government system of paying schools: schools are awarded funding based on how many pupils they have. I can't remember exactly what the number is, but about every thirty pupils moves them up about another pay grade. By glossing over the often endemic bullying problem to prospective parents, and by encouraging pupils to ignore bullying they encourage them not to tell their parents, who might move them to a different school.

What I'm trying to say is that we have these problems because teachers are unwilling to clamp down hard and fast on bullies. By actually punishing them, instead of only warning them and only when the problem becomes critical, we could stamp out the office bullying too, but by letting them get away with it, and by encouraging the victims to ignore the problem and allow the bully to abuse them, we create this culture and dig our own graves.

14 years? Office Bullying is occurs quite regularly in Europe. I was always under the impression it happened more so in the US.

I've never seen it in the US. And I've worked in a lot of offices.

14 years?


Yes 14 years, my opinion in the differences between office bullying levels is that in america bullies are usually too stupid to work anywhere cept Burger King but maybe in Europe the bullies are more likely to be working in offices?

EDIT: and this kind of stupid theories will tell you why I was bullied for so long ;)

This is why Im glad Im out of high school now :P
At least in College your 'allowed' to fight back.

lol well unfortunately colleges tend to think as badly of a watermelon to the face as schools do. Theres no justice in the world!

I don't really know anyone who has never been affected by bullying. The worst case I ever came across was a girl who came to our school after she and her family literally fled their last community. Some girls at her last school had accused her of having sex with all their boyfriends (yeah, sure) and basically decided to make her life hell. They beat her up, threatened her constantly, made death threats to her family, vandalised the house, even tried to break in to get at her...it was really terrible. What was her crime? She was a little too pretty I guess.

I went through school fighting...I like to think I never bullied anyone, but in truth, I am guilty of it once or twice, for sure. Until I had it pointed out to me that what I did was just as bad as what others were doing to me...I never did it again. I used to get attacked for being too Indian, and I used to get attacked for being too White. I got my ass kicked numerous times, and kicked ass in return. Back then though, people didn't use weapons...I shudder to think of the same situations with someone pulling a knife or something worse...but really, the school didn't help. What could they do? I don't know. Two girls in particular dogged me all through elementary, junior and senior high. I must have fought them twenty times in total...I used to go to school with my hair tightly braided and wound up so no one could grab it during a fight. It got to the point where if someone came up behind me and startled me, I'd grab them, ready to punch them...friends learned to call my name before they got to me.

But honestly, the fighting was okay, it didn't terrify me. It wasn't great, but I felt worse for people who got bullied in other ways...the more verbal attacks, the attacks on their character, the gossip, the mean pranks...to me that was way more humiliating. No one pulled that with me, because I always took it back to them physically. But I think if I was in that situation now, I'd probably get stabbed or shot.

I'm not looking forward to the agony of being a parent with kids who are experiencing bullying in school. I think most of my mother's grey hairs are because of me...she aged a little every single time I came home mussed up after a fight.

I've never seen it in the US. And I've worked in a lot of offices.
Oh, I've seen a fair amount of bullying in the workplace. There aren't well-used Resolution of Conflict in the Workplace and Harrassment in the Workplace Acts in place for nothing...

Oh, I've seen a fair amount of bullying in the workplace. There aren't well-used Resolution of Conflict in the Workplace and Harrassment in the Workplace Acts in place for nothing...

You must work in some shitty places.

I have never, ever seen bullying here in the US, not in a white collar workplace.

You must work in some shitty places.

I have never, ever seen bullying here in the US, not in a white collar workplace.
Not seeing it doesn't mean it doesn't happen...it just means it doesn't happen to you, and you aren't aware of it happening to others.

Oddly enough (or not), the worst bullying I've seen in the workplace happened at schools, between colleagues or between administration and teachers. No wonder more isn't done to deal with bullying among students.

Its funny(in a not so funny way) that there is a lot of protection for teachers who feel victimised by their co workers or students. Heck they can even sue for stress. How many children have achieved that. The whole thing really sickens me.

Not seeing it doesn't mean it doesn't happen...it just means it doesn't happen to you, and you aren't aware of it happening to others.

There are no signs at any of the offices, it isn't a central HR issue (like sexual harassment), and it has never been mentioned either officially or by rumor.

I emphasize the word "never". We're talking about office life from 1983 to 1987, and 1991 to the present, in a variety of large and small firms.

Then again, I don't work in a school.

A couple of articles about bullying in US workplaces:

from USA Today (http://www.keepmedia.com/pubs/USATODAY/2004/07/28/516010?extID=10032&oliID=213)

Emotional abuse (http://mobbing-usa.com/)

Links about workplace and school-based abuse: Bully online (http://www.bullyonline.org/workbully/usa.htm)

DK, it's really nice that you always try to paint a rosy view of life in the US as a counterpoint to the mudslinging that comes your way...but it's not realistic. Life may be perfect for you in the US, but your experience by no means applies to everyone else.

The larger the company, the more likely that bullying went on, and non-profit job sites had more bad behavior than for-profit firms. Also linked to bullying: poor job security and lack of trust between workers and bosses.

Never worked for a non-profit, and never worked in a place where any of us had poor job security.

And I tend to work in places where the trust between workers and bosses is extreme. Right now, I work at a place that has the flattest management model possible, and everyone has a say in how things are done.

You would think that we were all anarcho-syndicalists here at work.

When work sucks, I vote with my feet. Then again, I have that liberty. Many, I suppose, do not.

Some workplace bullying stats (http://bullyinginstitute.org/res.html)

Its funny(in a not so funny way) that there is a lot of protection for teachers who feel victimised by their co workers or students. Heck they can even sue for stress. How many children have achieved that. The whole thing really sickens me.

Against their teachers, at least, they can. An accusation from a pupil of abuse or other inappropriate behaviour by a teacher will lose that teacher their job, even if the accusation is proven false. This is why, in the UK, we have regulations saying that a teacher cannot be alone with a pupil under any circumstances.

Unfortunately, the issue of bullying by other students remains unresolved.

Mine made me start karate :/

but i loved it :D
I voluntarily started Tae Kwon-do after being bullied for a number of years.

I turned the tables and forced them to bent over, kiss my feet and respect me. Yes, it's crude, but, when people bully you, you need to respond with force. It's the only thing they understand.

Teachers at the elementary level do play favourites with the children. I know. My teachers did all the time.

They never graded fairly.

And yet, they wonder why there's bullying in schools. There is a bit of a biased and some children are naturally charismatic, so they can weasel out of anything while making the victim look... pathetic because they can't take a little jestering.

The kids picked on me from grade two to grade eight. I forced them to respect me in grade nine after I threatened my main bully with physical force. I didn't get in trouble for that because she was scared shitless.

Bullies are dumbfucks who are just cowards.

I was bullied for a number of things including the fact that I was physcially underdeveloped, I had a small hearing loss, I was a bookworm... I didn't dress like the other girls, my hair was weird, and for some reason, they called me a "cat-fucker"... just because I had two cats at home.

On a couple of occassions I had my paperback novels stolen and they would make fun of me because I reported the stolen books to the teacher for that class. They would mock me for a while.

I was shoved and locked into a locker.... though, one of my friends made the girl who did it unlock it. The girl complied because my friend was taller and a hell of a fat-ass.

The same girl who pushed me into a locker, accousted me on the bus and pinned me against the wall of the bus, which was thoughly crowded and began to rough me up. No one would help me... well, ok, there were over 30 people watching none of whom would help me, except for one guy who wanted to help, but couldn't get close enough.

I sadly regret now that I didn't treat him better when I was younger because he was one of the nicer people I had met. I think the fact that too many people were ganging up on me that I was sceptical and thought he was going to hurt me... that I didn't trust him.

Anyway, you know what got her off me? You know that the disgusting factor does work. I hocked up a huge loogy and horked on her, a nice phlegm'y one.

She also stuck gum in my hair and once sat beside me, and repeated punched me in the shoulder until it turned a deep shade of purple.

Random people I never met would make remarks at me about the same stuff the classmates I knew by name and face would bully me about.

Honestly, being able to defend yourself will scare any bully. They like people who aren't defend themselves; they're easy targets.

14 years? Office Bullying is occurs quite regularly in Europe. I was always under the impression it happened more so in the US.
Maybe it does but is not identified as such. Does it refer to physical bullyin or abusing a position of power?

Maybe it does but is not identified as such. Does it refer to physical bullyin or abusing a position of power?

The "bullying" referred to at British Telecom in their policy was physical bullying.

Where you are either being beaten, or threatened with bodily harm.

Apparently, it's really common there.

Honestly, being able to defend yourself will scare any bully. They like people who aren't defend themselves; they're easy targets.

Yeah, this guy has the right idea. At the start of seventh grade, I had some guy who just wouldn't leave me alone. I'm not sure what his problem was, maybe he had trouble making friends or something. Then one day he came for me and I damn near broke his jaw. After that, at least, I was only frozen out for the next two years rather than anything more active.

Of course, it doesn't always work. Teachers will take the side of a group of bullies against a single victim, and its especially bad if they only saw the violent reaction. So while its effective, and very satisfying, it can sometimes make the problem worse.

The "bullying" referred to at British Telecom in their policy was physical bullying.

Where you are either being beaten, or threatened with bodily harm.

Apparently, it's really common there.
I haven't seen that in North America. I've known of cases of peer pressure, abuse of power, and psychological harrassment, but not physical bullying as such. It may happen, but maybe not as prevalent.

I haven't seen that in North America. I've known of cases of peer pressure, abuse of power, and psychological harrassment, but not physical bullying as such. It may happen, but maybe not as prevalent.

I was astonished to learn that at British Telecom, in a country that supposedly is far more "civilized" than the US (in terms of violence), is far more violent in the workplace in terms of people getting beaten up in a white collar environment.

Apparently, beating the crap out of people is par for the course there.

In the years I've worked (in the United States), there was only one place that I saw behavior that I would call bullying; it was as far from white-collar as it gets, and I left after the first day. Not everyone always gets along at work, but the sort of bullying that goes on in schools doesn't seem to happen in workplaces here. If the worst that a newspaper can find is "verbal abuse", things aren't so bad.

Some of the stories in this thread are astounding. If such things had been done to me, I'd have killed the people responsible. And not with a gun, but with a blunt instrument, so I could feel the life draining out of their worthless bodies. Then again, maybe that sort of attitude is why even the kids who didn't like me never really tried to bully me. The only sure answer to bullying is escalation: when a bully hurts you, hurt him/her worse, until the bully either quits or dies, which are equivalent things. If you get in trouble, you can rightly claim that it's the bully's own fault for starting it, and in the United States at least, you can say you're just following the example set by our government. After all, if Afghanistan and Iraq aren't examples of massively disproportionate retaliation -- and I say that admiringly -- then what is?

As far as lawsuits, schools, and children's rights, such things take power out of your own hands anyway. Find a good hard stick, crack the bully in the back of the head, and let the bully be the one to complain ineffectively to the teacher.

Yeah, this guy has the right idea. At the start of seventh grade, I had some guy who just wouldn't leave me alone. I'm not sure what his problem was, maybe he had trouble making friends or something. Then one day he came for me and I damn near broke his jaw. After that, at least, I was only frozen out for the next two years rather than anything more active.

Of course, it doesn't always work. Teachers will take the side of a group of bullies against a single victim, and its especially bad if they only saw the violent reaction. So while its effective, and very satisfying, it can sometimes make the problem worse.
Teachers take the side of the bullies? No kidding...

I remember one instance where I wasn't bullied, but rather threatened by bigger, older boys because of something my friend had done. They said that I had to go "take care of her" because she had interfered with their game of hockey and that if I didn't, they'd hurt me, so, I went over and punched her in the gut and got in a shit load of trouble...

Force doesn't work, but, sometimes the consequences are worth the time to be seen as a force to reckon with. Honestly? I'd rather have been suspended from school for using force than to have spent some of what should've been the better years of my life living in on edge.

I go by the philosophy my dad grew up on - never take any smack from anyone. Sure, I might have been suspended...a few times...but nobody even attempts to bully me, mostly because of the things I can do in retaliation. Not sure if it was helpful, but just saying.

I used to be bullyed a long time ago, when I was 8-11 yrs old. These older kids picked on me all the time because of what I looked like. My sister hated seeing me sad because of the bullies. So, one day she asked to talk to one of the bullies and slapped him in the face. I was never bullied again by those people.:D

Actually, I made a thread about bullying a few months back after I had to do a huge research paper about it. To keep things simple, I'll break this up.

Both bullies and victims may experience short- and long-term effects, although bullies typically exhibit externalizing behavior (i.e. aggression and hyperactivity) and victims display internalizing behavior (i.e. depression, anxiety, and/or psychosomatic illness). Kumpulainen also studied the characteristics of bully-victims, or bullies who are also victims, and found that they display more serious and more numerous short- and long-term effects than those who are only bullies or victims. Bully-victims are likely to show both externalizing and internalizing behavior, as may be expected. This study also found that children involved in bullying or victimization are much more likely to be referred for psychiatric consultation than children who are not, with bully-victims having the highest probability of all.

Personal short-term effects include: low self-esteem; anxiety; suspiciousness of others; affected friendships and other relationships; withdrawal; guilt and shame; depression or anhedonia; anger and aggression; apathy; psychosomatic illness; and attempted suicide. Additional short-term effects specific to school are: poor concentration; absences from school due to psychosomatic illness; attempting to avoid school; changing the route to school; working obsessively hard in school or neglect of schoolwork; and wariness of speaking in class. Possible other long-term effects besides those already mentioned: eager to please people or attention-seeking; fear of public speaking; wary of authority figures or children; paranoia; vivid memories of bullying; nightmares; difficulty socializing or feeling of isolation; feeling of protectiveness towards children or other victims; affected job choice or career, feeling unable to reach their potential; and proneness to criminal convictions or involvement in serious recidivist crime.

The consequences of being bullied depend on some mediating factors, most notably the severity of the bullying. The more severe, intense, and ongoing the bullying, the more likely children will report short- and long-term effects. Hugh-Jones and Smith reported that roughly half of their sample reported long-term effects, but almost all reported short-term effects of bullying.

One of the most common effects of being bullied at a young age is the probability of continued victimization. Although the number of bullies tends to decrease with age, the number of victims appears to remain relatively constant, particularly among boys. This suggests that there is often one bully victimizing several students.

...and the end of the saga.

When bullying takes place in a school setting, teachers are the natural authority figure to look to for intervention. Teachers may not notice bullying going on in their classrooms; those who do may or may not try to do something about it. Harris and Willoughby found that over half of the teachers they surveyed reported that they would always intervene if they witnessed bullying, but only a very small percentage of these same teachers claimed that other teachers were always interested in intervening. In a recent study by Yoon (2004), teachers reported more of a willingness to intervene if they had high perceived self-efficacy in behavior management, if they perceived the bullying as being very serious, and if they felt a high degree of empathy for the victim.

These studies show that not all teachers will intervene if they witness bullying, which has serious implications for students. Sourander and Helstelä found that victims “whose teachers were aware of the bullying and did nothing about it were two and a half times more likely to report effects on school work than those whose teachers did something to help."

I was bullied a lot at school, for many years. Started in Junior school, though that did peter out for a while. Was mostly name calling. I've always been short which has never helped, always made people with that idea of "I'm bigger and so better than you". Didn't help that I was also usually in the higher levels of study throughout my school career, bullies don't seem to like that...
It got worse again during secondary school, mostly in years 10 and 11. It was only a small number of people, but it definately hurt. I was lucky in that it was never anything physical, which was good for me as I've never been the "rough and tumble" type, but some of the mental stuff has definately stayed with me. It mostly stopped when I became... well, not exactly friends with, but acquianted with what many people felt was the "hardest guy in the year" (I got put in the lower science GCSE band for year 10 as me and my biology teacher in year 9 really didn't get on). I sat on the same table as him during Biology lessons and helped him pass the year (no, I didn't do any work for him). He was a prat, but in his own way, when he wasn't trying to act up to his peers, an alright bloke. Because of that, if anyone tried anything he'd beat the crap out of anyone. Surprising what a bit of muscle backing you can do...
Rather interestingly I met one of those that bullied me a few years back in the pub. He apologised to me for all the things he said, which at least proved he'd grown up, and bought me a pint, which is never a bad thing. I found out that whilst I'd got a degree, been self employed (at least briefly), managed people, and am now doing a new course to further my medical career chances (no, my degree wasn't anything to do with medicine... randomly) the one guy who still curses my name is a builder on minimum wage with almsot no career advancement opportunities after being unemployed for 3 years. I felt a bit smug about that...:D

@ DK, when was that BT thing because I've worked in a few offices and now work in the NHS (supposidly a lot of bullying happens there) and have seen nor heard of any.

I've never been bullied to the extent that your sister has. I wish you and your family the best of luck in bringing the bully to justice, if possible. Even if he never hurts your sister again, that child will go on to hurt and harass other children, especially if the parents at least condone the behavior.

I have been bullied at school, but it hasn't gone beyond name-calling, which does hurt. Luckily, however, the stupidity of the bullies can usually be used as an advantage to make them stop it when it is only name-calling.

In 7th grade, I was called a ghost by two girls day after day. They would ask me why I don't just go to a tanning bed or lie out in the sun for a few hours so that I could be tan like everyone else apparently is in Florida. I happen to like my pale complexion, so I finally came up with a way to make them stop.

The next time they came to pester me about my skin, I said, "The UV radiation index is too high in this region."

This stopped them in their tracks, and they replied, "We're not science freaks, so we don't know what radiation is." I thought, "More like not likely to do well in science. Radiation is on the list of science terms that everyone should know. Well, everyone who intends to pass." Of course, I didn't say that though. I'm not a bully, and I had the satisfaction of being victorious, and, better yet, of being victorious without being hurtful.

Another time, a random person came up to me and started asking me potentially embarassing and annoying questions. It didn't really get to the level of bullying, though, because I had a strategy in mind. Instead of answering the questions, I asked something to the effect of these questions, "Why are you asking me these questions?"

"Because my friend asked me to."

"And why, pray tell, does your friend want to know?"

"Because she's stupid."

"If she's stupid, then is there really any point in asking me these questions?"

"Um, I guess not." Then she walked away, and I had won.

Once someone took my backpack and moved it somewhere else. I never found out who did, so I don't know if it was an act of bullying or a random prank. But it was serious, and I had to get the administrators to help me find it.

Once I was having a sort-of-conversation with someone the way I'm apt to do out of shyness: they were talking, and I responded with nods or shakes of my head or, if necessary, with pantomime. After a while, the person had the nerve to ask me if I was mute! I had half a mind to just shake my head and say nothing, but instead I said, "No, I am capable of talking." And thus the fun but unusual conversation turned to silence.

Now that I think of it, though, it did escalate to physical bullying once, in high school. Someone tripped my at the bus loop, so that I fell onto the
asphalt and tore up both knees of my pants. Both knees and one of my elbows were scraped up. I still managed to catch my bus, and my friend's dad treated the scrapes, which stayed there for quite a long time.

I reported it to the clinic as an accident the next morning, because I hadn't seen anyone trip me, and at that point I had no clue that my injury was someone else's fault. However, at the end of the day, a classmate of mine who I knew was there when he fell because he had asked me if I was all right,told me that he had seen someone intentionally trip me.

Sorry that this is so long!

My skin is very pale, and I get this problem too. I say, "You're so racist! Everyone should be proud of their skin color."
They usually go off to contemplate this and then leave me alone.

I've never been bullied to the extent that your sister has. I wish you and your family the best of luck in bringing the bully to justice, if possible. Even if he never hurts your sister again, that child will go on to hurt and harass other children, especially if the parents at least condone the behavior.

I have been bullied at school, but it hasn't gone beyond name-calling, which does hurt. Luckily, however, the stupidity of the bullies can usually be used as an advantage to make them stop it when it is only name-calling.

In 7th grade, I was called a ghost by two girls day after day. They would ask me why I don't just go to a tanning bed or lie out in the sun for a few hours so that I could be tan like everyone else apparently is in Florida. I happen to like my pale complexion, so I finally came up with a way to make them stop.

The next time they came to pester me about my skin, I said, "The UV radiation index is too high in this region."

This stopped them in their tracks, and they replied, "We're not science freaks, so we don't know what radiation is." I thought, "More like not likely to do well in science. Radiation is on the list of science terms that everyone should know. Well, everyone who intends to pass." Of course, I didn't say that though. I'm not a bully, and I had the satisfaction of being victorious, and, better yet, of being victorious without being hurtful.

Another time, a random person came up to me and started asking me potentially embarassing and annoying questions. It didn't really get to the level of bullying, though, because I had a strategy in mind. Instead of answering the questions, I asked something to the effect of these questions, "Why are you asking me these questions?"

"Because my friend asked me to."

"And why, pray tell, does your friend want to know?"

"Because she's stupid."

"If she's stupid, then is there really any point in asking me these questions?"

"Um, I guess not." Then she walked away, and I had won.

Once someone took my backpack and moved it somewhere else. I never found out who did, so I don't know if it was an act of bullying or a random prank. But it was serious, and I had to get the administrators to help me find it.

Once I was having a sort-of-conversation with someone the way I'm apt to do out of shyness: they were talking, and I responded with nods or shakes of my head or, if necessary, with pantomime. After a while, the person had the nerve to ask me if I was mute! I had half a mind to just shake my head and say nothing, but instead I said, "No, I am capable of talking." And thus the fun but unusual conversation turned to silence.

Now that I think of it, though, it did escalate to physical bullying once, in high school. Someone tripped my at the bus loop, so that I fell onto the
asphalt and tore up both knees of my pants. Both knees and one of my elbows were scraped up. I still managed to catch my bus, and my friend's dad treated the scrapes, which stayed there for quite a long time.

I reported it to the clinic as an accident the next morning, because I hadn't seen anyone trip me, and at that point I had no clue that my injury was someone else's fault. However, at the end of the day, a classmate of mine who I knew was there when he fell because he had asked me if I was all right,told me that he had seen someone intentionally trip me.

Sorry that this is so long!

My skin is very pale, and I get this problem too. I say, "You're so racist! Everyone should be proud of their skin color."
They usually go off to contemplate this and then leave me alone.

I've never been bullied to the extent that your sister has. I wish you and your family the best of luck in bringing the bully to justice, if possible. Even if he never hurts your sister again, that child will go on to hurt and harass other children, especially if the parents at least condone the behavior.

I have been bullied at school, but it hasn't gone beyond name-calling, which does hurt. Luckily, however, the stupidity of the bullies can usually be used as an advantage to make them stop it when it is only name-calling.

In 7th grade, I was called a ghost by two girls day after day. They would ask me why I don't just go to a tanning bed or lie out in the sun for a few hours so that I could be tan like everyone else apparently is in Florida. I happen to like my pale complexion, so I finally came up with a way to make them stop.

The next time they came to pester me about my skin, I said, "The UV radiation index is too high in this region."

This stopped them in their tracks, and they replied, "We're not science freaks, so we don't know what radiation is." I thought, "More like not likely to do well in science. Radiation is on the list of science terms that everyone should know. Well, everyone who intends to pass." Of course, I didn't say that though. I'm not a bully, and I had the satisfaction of being victorious, and, better yet, of being victorious without being hurtful.

Another time, a random person came up to me and started asking me potentially embarassing and annoying questions. It didn't really get to the level of bullying, though, because I had a strategy in mind. Instead of answering the questions, I asked something to the effect of these questions, "Why are you asking me these questions?"

"Because my friend asked me to."

"And why, pray tell, does your friend want to know?"

"Because she's stupid."

"If she's stupid, then is there really any point in asking me these questions?"

"Um, I guess not." Then she walked away, and I had won.

Once someone took my backpack and moved it somewhere else. I never found out who did, so I don't know if it was an act of bullying or a random prank. But it was serious, and I had to get the administrators to help me find it.

Once I was having a sort-of-conversation with someone the way I'm apt to do out of shyness: they were talking, and I responded with nods or shakes of my head or, if necessary, with pantomime. After a while, the person had the nerve to ask me if I was mute! I had half a mind to just shake my head and say nothing, but instead I said, "No, I am capable of talking." And thus the fun but unusual conversation turned to silence.

Now that I think of it, though, it did escalate to physical bullying once, in high school. Someone tripped my at the bus loop, so that I fell onto the
asphalt and tore up both knees of my pants. Both knees and one of my elbows were scraped up. I still managed to catch my bus, and my friend's dad treated the scrapes, which stayed there for quite a long time.

I reported it to the clinic as an accident the next morning, because I hadn't seen anyone trip me, and at that point I had no clue that my injury was someone else's fault. However, at the end of the day, a classmate of mine who I knew was there when he fell because he had asked me if I was all right,told me that he had seen someone intentionally trip me.

Sorry that this is so long!

My skin is very pale, and I get this problem too. I say, "You're so racist! Everyone should be proud of their skin color."
They usually go off to contemplate this and then leave me alone.

I've never been bullied to the extent that your sister has. I wish you and your family the best of luck in bringing the bully to justice, if possible. Even if he never hurts your sister again, that child will go on to hurt and harass other children, especially if the parents at least condone the behavior.

I have been bullied at school, but it hasn't gone beyond name-calling, which does hurt. Luckily, however, the stupidity of the bullies can usually be used as an advantage to make them stop it when it is only name-calling.

In 7th grade, I was called a ghost by two girls day after day. They would ask me why I don't just go to a tanning bed or lie out in the sun for a few hours so that I could be tan like everyone else apparently is in Florida. I happen to like my pale complexion, so I finally came up with a way to make them stop.

The next time they came to pester me about my skin, I said, "The UV radiation index is too high in this region."

This stopped them in their tracks, and they replied, "We're not science freaks, so we don't know what radiation is." I thought, "More like not likely to do well in science. Radiation is on the list of science terms that everyone should know. Well, everyone who intends to pass." Of course, I didn't say that though. I'm not a bully, and I had the satisfaction of being victorious, and, better yet, of being victorious without being hurtful.

Another time, a random person came up to me and started asking me potentially embarassing and annoying questions. It didn't really get to the level of bullying, though, because I had a strategy in mind. Instead of answering the questions, I asked something to the effect of these questions, "Why are you asking me these questions?"

"Because my friend asked me to."

"And why, pray tell, does your friend want to know?"

"Because she's stupid."

"If she's stupid, then is there really any point in asking me these questions?"

"Um, I guess not." Then she walked away, and I had won.

Once someone took my backpack and moved it somewhere else. I never found out who did, so I don't know if it was an act of bullying or a random prank. But it was serious, and I had to get the administrators to help me find it.

Once I was having a sort-of-conversation with someone the way I'm apt to do out of shyness: they were talking, and I responded with nods or shakes of my head or, if necessary, with pantomime. After a while, the person had the nerve to ask me if I was mute! I had half a mind to just shake my head and say nothing, but instead I said, "No, I am capable of talking." And thus the fun but unusual conversation turned to silence.

Now that I think of it, though, it did escalate to physical bullying once, in high school. Someone tripped my at the bus loop, so that I fell onto the
asphalt and tore up both knees of my pants. Both knees and one of my elbows were scraped up. I still managed to catch my bus, and my friend's dad treated the scrapes, which stayed there for quite a long time.

I reported it to the clinic as an accident the next morning, because I hadn't seen anyone trip me, and at that point I had no clue that my injury was someone else's fault. However, at the end of the day, a classmate of mine who I knew was there when he fell because he had asked me if I was all right,told me that he had seen someone intentionally trip me.

Sorry that this is so long!

My skin is very pale, and I get this problem too. I say, "You're so racist! Everyone should be proud of their skin color."
They usually go off to contemplate this and then leave me alone.

I've never been bullied to the extent that your sister has. I wish you and your family the best of luck in bringing the bully to justice, if possible. Even if he never hurts your sister again, that child will go on to hurt and harass other children, especially if the parents at least condone the behavior.

I have been bullied at school, but it hasn't gone beyond name-calling, which does hurt. Luckily, however, the stupidity of the bullies can usually be used as an advantage to make them stop it when it is only name-calling.

In 7th grade, I was called a ghost by two girls day after day. They would ask me why I don't just go to a tanning bed or lie out in the sun for a few hours so that I could be tan like everyone else apparently is in Florida. I happen to like my pale complexion, so I finally came up with a way to make them stop.

The next time they came to pester me about my skin, I said, "The UV radiation index is too high in this region."

This stopped them in their tracks, and they replied, "We're not science freaks, so we don't know what radiation is." I thought, "More like not likely to do well in science. Radiation is on the list of science terms that everyone should know. Well, everyone who intends to pass." Of course, I didn't say that though. I'm not a bully, and I had the satisfaction of being victorious, and, better yet, of being victorious without being hurtful.

Another time, a random person came up to me and started asking me potentially embarassing and annoying questions. It didn't really get to the level of bullying, though, because I had a strategy in mind. Instead of answering the questions, I asked something to the effect of these questions, "Why are you asking me these questions?"

"Because my friend asked me to."

"And why, pray tell, does your friend want to know?"

"Because she's stupid."

"If she's stupid, then is there really any point in asking me these questions?"

"Um, I guess not." Then she walked away, and I had won.

Once someone took my backpack and moved it somewhere else. I never found out who did, so I don't know if it was an act of bullying or a random prank. But it was serious, and I had to get the administrators to help me find it.

Once I was having a sort-of-conversation with someone the way I'm apt to do out of shyness: they were talking, and I responded with nods or shakes of my head or, if necessary, with pantomime. After a while, the person had the nerve to ask me if I was mute! I had half a mind to just shake my head and say nothing, but instead I said, "No, I am capable of talking." And thus the fun but unusual conversation turned to silence.

Now that I think of it, though, it did escalate to physical bullying once, in high school. Someone tripped my at the bus loop, so that I fell onto the
asphalt and tore up both knees of my pants. Both knees and one of my elbows were scraped up. I still managed to catch my bus, and my friend's dad treated the scrapes, which stayed there for quite a long time.

I reported it to the clinic as an accident the next morning, because I hadn't seen anyone trip me, and at that point I had no clue that my injury was someone else's fault. However, at the end of the day, a classmate of mine who I knew was there when he fell because he had asked me if I was all right,told me that he had seen someone intentionally trip me.

Sorry that this is so long!

My skin is very pale, and I get this problem too. I say, "You're so racist! Everyone should be proud of their skin color."
They usually go off to contemplate this and then leave me alone.

:( sorry for double posting so much.

:( sorry for double posting so much.

That was no double post, that was a fecking quintuple! That must be some kind of record!

Just go back and delete all but one of them.

;)

:( sorry for double posting so much.
It was important and needed to be repeated. :D

My skin is very pale, and I get this problem too. I say, "You're so racist! Everyone should be proud of their skin color."
They usually go off to contemplate this and then leave me alone.

Yeah, I mentioned that in a speech I made for the Martin Luther King Jr. Speech Contest. I won third place, and I can only assume that it was for the writing of the speech, as I'm abysmal at public speaking.

The greatest anti-bullying talk I've ever recieved was way back in 5th grade... our principal told us that if we were being bullyed, to walk up to the bully and say "I feel bad when you say that."