NationStates Jolt Archive


Hummers

Saipea
13-07-2006, 22:21
I just saw quite an ironic [blah blah semantics] commercial for Hummers. I can't find a link to a video of it, but it basically shows a woman getting a Hummer because she's tired of being pushed around (specifically because her son got cut in front of on a playground slide and the other kid's mother told her “tough.”)

...Now, aren't those the kind of people critics claim buy Hummers: insecure idiots?
Sinuhue
13-07-2006, 22:24
Sorry, but when I think of hummers, it's not an automobile that springs to mind.
The Supreme Galaxy
13-07-2006, 22:25
Sorry, but when I think of hummers, it's not an automobile that springs to mind.

Seconded.
Saipea
13-07-2006, 22:25
Sorry, but when I think of hummers, it's not an automobile that springs to mind.

Same here. But ambiguous titles attract attention. :D
Sinuhue
13-07-2006, 22:27
Same here. But ambiguous titles attract attention. :D
Yeah, but now I'm disappointed and slightly agitated.
Unlucky_and_unbiddable
13-07-2006, 22:28
why do bees hum?



Because they don't know the words.
Carnivorous Lickers
13-07-2006, 22:30
I've never paid for a Hummer
Pyotr
13-07-2006, 22:30
i heard a speech by the guy who designed the hummer( a frenchman ironically) and he said he designed it especially to make the driver feel dominate over other cars
Not bad
13-07-2006, 22:31
i heard a speech by the guy who designed the hummer( a frenchman ironically) and he said he designed it especially to make the driver feel dominate over other cars

I call bullshit
Sinuhue
13-07-2006, 22:31
I've never paid for a Hummer
I bet...but enjoyed many, nonetheless?
Saipea
13-07-2006, 22:31
Yeah, but now I'm disappointed and slightly agitated.

I'm sorry. I'm sure there are plenty of other smutty threads floating around.
Sinuhue
13-07-2006, 22:31
i heard a speech by the guy who designed the hummer( a frenchman ironically) and he said he designed it especially to make the driver feel dominate over other cars
Weren't they originally military vehicles?
Not bad
13-07-2006, 22:33
Weren't they originally military vehicles?


Yes, hum vees
Sinuhue
13-07-2006, 22:33
I'm sorry. I'm sure there are plenty of other smutty threads floating around.
*looks*
Sigh.

They've really cut down the amount of smut on this forum. *cries*
Sinuhue
13-07-2006, 22:34
Yes, hum vees
That's what my dad told me...so I join your in your chorus of bullshit.
Saipea
13-07-2006, 22:37
That's what my dad told me...so I join your in your chorus of bullshit.

Agreed. But you have to admit that that commercial is a bit...telling.
Not bad
13-07-2006, 22:38
That's what my dad told me...so I join your in your chorus of bullshit.

*nods to Sinuhue's dad*
Drunk commies deleted
13-07-2006, 22:39
If you aren't tooling along the airport road near Baghdad and you're driving a Hummer you're willfully funding regimes that sponsor terrorism. Traitor.
Ieuano
13-07-2006, 22:40
i suppose that advert deserves a whole chorus of BULLSHIT

join me in singing

"bull, bull, bull SHIT"
Vetalia
13-07-2006, 22:40
If you're going to buy an SUV, at least buy one that looks good. Face it, ugly-ass metal boxes aren't going to hold up against the far more visually satisfying Escalade or Navigator. I mean, at least those have the external appearance to go with the interior...
Ieuano
13-07-2006, 22:41
or maybe an XC90...
Sinuhue
13-07-2006, 22:42
My dad's dad had a tank in his front yard. My dad used to get into trouble for pointing the turret at the neigbour's house. Now THAT was a cool vehicle! They cut it up, and rigged it like a tractor. That thing would've out cooled at hummer any day...
The Supreme Galaxy
13-07-2006, 23:12
Yes, hum vees

Which is actually from the acronym HMMWV (High Mobility Multi-Wheeled Vehicle). I drove plenty of them in the military and could never figure out why on earth anyone would want one as a luxury vehicle. Of course, one of my personal greatest accomplishments is sleeping in the back of a Humvee while going across the TransIsthmian highway in Panama. If you can do that you can sleep anywhere. :D
Baked squirrels
13-07-2006, 23:19
I wouldn't get a Hummer because I don't have the money to pay for the gas. I can pay for my Bonneville's gas, but that gets about 26-27mpg.
Boonytopia
14-07-2006, 09:40
That's why I'd buy an urban 4WD. I wouldn't want my kids to be bullied because I drive a small car. :rolleyes:
Harlesburg
14-07-2006, 09:48
I wouldn't pay for a Hummer...:eek:
I don't know if that is dirty.:(

Back in the day that was my prefered Sof skinned vehicle for taking over the world in with my masive armies...
IL Ruffino
14-07-2006, 09:51
hehe!
Duntscruwithus
14-07-2006, 09:56
I don't know what the mil-spec version is like, but I've ridden in the civvy version. Biggest and most expensive piece of shit I've ever had the displeasure to ride in. Interior was cramped as hell, crap-assed vinyl jumpseats with zero leg room, cheap carpeting covering the highlights.
I don't understand why the military like the damned things. Sitting in the rear passenger seat, I had to slouch down, lean forwards and duck my head to be able to see anything out the side window beyond the hubcaps of the car next to us.
You know how hard it is to slouch in your seat when your knees are already pushing dents in the front seat? Oh, and the electric window switch failed when I opened my window.
Bodhis
14-07-2006, 10:23
I'm not big on SUVs. However, if I had to buy one I would get the Infiniti FX45.

I saw the H3 commercial and I thought it was one of the dumbest car commercials I've ever seen. I was okay with the "urban techno" stuff (they sponsered the Detroit Electronic Music Festival), but I don't understand how they think their SUV can stand for so many things and be marketed towards so many demographics.
HotRodia
14-07-2006, 10:35
I wouldn't buy a hummer, but if someone gave me one I could roll it and use it as a shade-enhancing device.
Shyftoria
14-07-2006, 10:39
to quote dylan moran:

''how small must your cock be to own one of those things...Schwarzanegger drives one and he's govenor of california...just one of those sentences you try to forget every day or you'd go mad and kill yourself....it wouldn't be so bad, but he essentally only gained his popularity from lifting, and lowering heavy things....which is something normal people don't do; the piano falls on granny, granny has mixed feelings about this, we all pitch in to move the piano, and sunday dinner carries on as normal...''

he was amazing live
Ieuano
14-07-2006, 10:41
hummers ha, my dad was driving down a lane (the type with hedges both sides) following a hummer and disaster stuck, they met two cars coming in the opposite direction!
Boonytopia
14-07-2006, 10:49
hummers ha, my dad was driving down a lane (the type with hedges both sides) following a hummer and disaster stuck, they met two cars coming in the opposite direction!

How did it end?
Ieuano
14-07-2006, 11:00
there was a junction about half a mile back, my dad had to reverse back to it and he eventually escaped, upon reaching the juncition to go an alternate route, Hummer free
Ieuano
14-07-2006, 11:00
that was the most exciting story today
Saipea
14-07-2006, 11:03
to quote dylan moran:

''how small must your cock be to own one of those things...Schwarzanegger drives one and he's govenor of california...just one of those sentences you try to forget every day or you'd go mad and kill yourself....it wouldn't be so bad, but he essentally only gained his popularity from lifting, and lowering heavy things....which is something normal people don't do; the piano falls on granny, granny has mixed feelings about this, we all pitch in to move the piano, and sunday dinner carries on as normal...''

he was amazing live

I skimmed the name as Dan Quayle. It only made it funnier.
Boonytopia
14-07-2006, 11:04
there was a junction about half a mile back, my dad had to reverse back to it and he eventually escaped, upon reaching the juncition to go an alternate route, Hummer free

I suppose Welsh lanes just weren't made for oversized American 4WDs.
Ieuano
14-07-2006, 11:20
nope, the main roads arnt too good for them either
Nural
14-07-2006, 11:26
I'm not big on SUVs. However, if I had to buy one I would get the Infiniti FX45.

I saw the H3 commercial and I thought it was one of the dumbest car commercials I've ever seen. I was okay with the "urban techno" stuff (they sponsered the Detroit Electronic Music Festival), but I don't understand how they think their SUV can stand for so many things and be marketed towards so many demographics.I saw a H3 ad like the OP described only with a man. I laughed at it and said to my brother that I'll skip getting a Hummer to prove my "toughness" and go all the way by getting a tank instead.
Empty Beer Bottles
14-07-2006, 19:02
I just saw quite an ironic [blah blah semantics] commercial for Hummers. I can't find a link to a video of it, but it basically shows a woman getting a Hummer because she's tired of being pushed around (specifically because her son got cut in front of on a playground slide and the other kid's mother told her “tough.”)


Nowhere in the recap does this say the ad is for a vehicle. I'm still intrigued! So does the woman who says "tough" give the hummer or recieve it?

*slinks back down into my daydream*
Jenrak
14-07-2006, 19:06
I just saw quite an ironic [blah blah semantics] commercial for Hummers. I can't find a link to a video of it, but it basically shows a woman getting a Hummer because she's tired of being pushed around (specifically because her son got cut in front of on a playground slide and the other kid's mother told her “tough.”)

...Now, aren't those the kind of people critics claim buy Hummers: insecure idiots?

Hooray! Insecurity and half-assed jobs are what make the Westen World great.
Hammergoats
14-07-2006, 19:08
*tries to say this without giggling*
Hummers are for men with small peckers. The vehicle hummer, I mean. the other hummer is fine. ;)
Kazus
14-07-2006, 19:23
I just saw quite an ironic [blah blah semantics] commercial for Hummers. I can't find a link to a video of it, but it basically shows a woman getting a Hummer because she's tired of being pushed around (specifically because her son got cut in front of on a playground slide and the other kid's mother told her “tough.”)

...Now, aren't those the kind of people critics claim buy Hummers: insecure idiots?

Yes. Small self-confidence is easily remedied by huge gas-guzzling vehicle. Or at least thats what alot of people think.
Soviestan
14-07-2006, 19:37
I've never paid for a Hummer
then what did you do, steal it?
Insane Leftists
14-07-2006, 19:43
Sorry, but when I think of hummers, it's not an automobile that springs to mind.
That's the more enjoyable and less expensive hummer.
Soviestan
14-07-2006, 19:45
That's the more enjoyable and less expensive hummer.
Are you talking about the H3, because I find the original hummer to be much better.
Xenophobialand
14-07-2006, 19:51
I just saw quite an ironic [blah blah semantics] commercial for Hummers. I can't find a link to a video of it, but it basically shows a woman getting a Hummer because she's tired of being pushed around (specifically because her son got cut in front of on a playground slide and the other kid's mother told her “tough.”)

...Now, aren't those the kind of people critics claim buy Hummers: insecure idiots?

See, this is what happens when you don't give your children quality education. Anyone who has ever read Mark Twain knows that the proper solution to being bullied isn't to go buy something, especially a colossal urban monstrosity. Instead, it's cheaper and more effective to simply smile and nod and then hit them in the head with a brick when their back is turned. I promise you that the brick is a lot cheaper and more portable than a damned H3, people.
Harlesburg
15-07-2006, 00:06
hehe!
Don't mock me!:(
IL Ruffino
15-07-2006, 00:40
Don't mock me!:(
Oh why would I ever mock you?!

You're so cool and awesome.. I could NEVER mock you!
Freerangerland
15-07-2006, 00:42
Originally Posted by Pyotr
i heard a speech by the guy who designed the hummer( a frenchman ironically) and he said he designed it especially to make the driver feel dominate over other cars

I call bullshit

I second that, the hummer(hmmwv) was designed first and foremost to be an off road vehicle. the civilian version came out a few years later
Freerangerland
15-07-2006, 00:45
If you're going to buy an SUV, at least buy one that looks good. Face it, ugly-ass metal boxes aren't going to hold up against the far more visually satisfying Escalade or Navigator. I mean, at least those have the external appearance to go with the interior...

I'd still take an H-1, don't care how bad you think they look, when I can drive over your Escalade... LOL
Freerangerland
15-07-2006, 00:48
I don't know what the mil-spec version is like, but I've ridden in the civvy version. Biggest and most expensive piece of shit I've ever had the displeasure to ride in. Interior was cramped as hell, crap-assed vinyl jumpseats with zero leg room, cheap carpeting covering the highlights.
I don't understand why the military like the damned things. Sitting in the rear passenger seat, I had to slouch down, lean forwards and duck my head to be able to see anything out the side window beyond the hubcaps of the car next to us.
You know how hard it is to slouch in your seat when your knees are already pushing dents in the front seat? Oh, and the electric window switch failed when I opened my window.

the military like them because you can drive over/through most things, beats most stock 4x4's in off road handling
Duntscruwithus
15-07-2006, 18:58
the military like them because you can drive over/through most things, beats most stock 4x4's in off road handling

And yet the military has been testing more conventional off-road designs to replace the Hummvee for the past several years. Watched a thing on it on the boobtoob a couple years ago.

Heh, give me a stock 70's Toyota Land Cruiser anyday. FJ-40 all the way baybee!
Eutrusca
15-07-2006, 19:07
I call bullshit
As do I:

"The history Of the HUMMER (http://www.lynchhummer.com/History.html) begins in 1979 with competition for the development of a vehicle to meet the Army's highest standards in a High Mobility Multi-Purpose Wheeled Vehicle (HMMWV). As that development race began, Teledyne and Chrysler Defense (later sold to General Dynamics) already had designs on their drawing boards. The proposed Chrysler vehicle was an adapted version of the Saluki desert design. while its Teledyne counterpart sprang from the design of a vehicle known as the Cheetah. Though AM General appeared to be well behind the others, the company moved into this competition with no preconceived design notions, rolled up its sleeves, and soon created an original -- the HUMMER.

"AM General's prototype HUMMER went to test in the Nevada desert in July 1980 -- only eleven months from its design board beginnings. This was the first of many breakthroughs that demonstrated the company's know-how and leadership. The Army now had three serious competitors with vehicles under test.

"The Army's formal procurement of test vehicles began in February 1981. Six proposals came in from industry and were evaluated against the Army's HMMWV specifications. The three most responsive designs were selected, and in June 1981 contracts were awarded to General Dynamics, Teledyne and AM General."
Les Drapeaux Brulants
15-07-2006, 19:24
As do I:

"The history Of the HUMMER (http://www.lynchhummer.com/History.html) begins in 1979 with competition for the development of a vehicle to meet the Army's highest standards in a High Mobility Multi-Purpose Wheeled Vehicle (HMMWV). As that development race began, Teledyne and Chrysler Defense (later sold to General Dynamics) already had designs on their drawing boards. The proposed Chrysler vehicle was an adapted version of the Saluki desert design. while its Teledyne counterpart sprang from the design of a vehicle known as the Cheetah. Though AM General appeared to be well behind the others, the company moved into this competition with no preconceived design notions, rolled up its sleeves, and soon created an original -- the HUMMER.

"AM General's prototype HUMMER went to test in the Nevada desert in July 1980 -- only eleven months from its design board beginnings. This was the first of many breakthroughs that demonstrated the company's know-how and leadership. The Army now had three serious competitors with vehicles under test.

"The Army's formal procurement of test vehicles began in February 1981. Six proposals came in from industry and were evaluated against the Army's HMMWV specifications. The three most responsive designs were selected, and in June 1981 contracts were awarded to General Dynamics, Teledyne and AM General."
Turns out the HumVs make pretty darn good second homes, too. When I was deployed in Desert Shield/Storm, I lived in ours for a good month before we were able to move into tents. I actually strung some camo netting from the side and made a little lean-to, but I figure the HumV was still part of the shelter.
Eutrusca
15-07-2006, 19:34
Turns out the HumVs make pretty darn good second homes, too. When I was deployed in Desert Shield/Storm, I lived in ours for a good month before we were able to move into tents. I actually strung some camo netting from the side and made a little lean-to, but I figure the HumV was still part of the shelter.
Ahh! GI most creative! Now if only you can develop "instant woman." :D
Les Drapeaux Brulants
15-07-2006, 19:38
Ahh! GI most creative! Now if only you can develop "instant woman." :D
We weren't "integrated", but it was easy to go find some battalion support units that were. I sent my driver down to the motor pool to "change the oil" regularly. There weren't many BAM officers in the unit, though. I think the Air Wing got most of them.
Surf Shack
15-07-2006, 19:41
Sorry, but when I think of hummers, it's not an automobile that springs to mind.

Soviestan, I think maybe you don't speak such good English, or you would have realized by now that some of us are referring to a hummer that is not a vehicle. Look it up online for a definition, as it is a sexual act and I might get in trouble for describing. it definitely is not an H3. ;)
Eutrusca
15-07-2006, 19:52
We weren't "integrated", but it was easy to go find some battalion support units that were. I sent my driver down to the motor pool to "change the oil" regularly. There weren't many BAM officers in the unit, though. I think the Air Wing got most of them.
Apply your creative abilities to this problem and I guarantee you will become rich beyond the dreams of avarice. And the power! The power! :D
Surf Shack
15-07-2006, 19:56
Ahh! GI most creative! Now if only you can develop "instant woman." :D

LOL, we did ;) .

Ever hear of Abu Ghraib?
PsychoticDan
15-07-2006, 20:06
i heard a speech by the guy who designed the hummer( a frenchman ironically) and he said he designed it especially to make the driver feel dominate over other cars
Hummers were built under contract specifically for the US armed forces. They went commercial afterwards.
PsychoticDan
15-07-2006, 20:08
If you aren't tooling along the airport road near Baghdad and you're driving a Hummer you're willfully funding regimes that sponsor terrorism. Traitor.
I couldn't agree more.
Intangelon
15-07-2006, 20:13
Sorry, but when I think of hummers, it's not an automobile that springs to mind.
"Springs"? You semantic sexpot, you!
Intangelon
15-07-2006, 20:16
or maybe an XC90...
The "Miata on steroids!"

Those things are terminally cute!

The old Suzuki TV ad showed them popping out of Pez dispensers.
Slapcr3tunderground
15-07-2006, 20:16
after all those messages i still think aboat a hummer:rolleyes:
Intangelon
15-07-2006, 20:28
Closest thing to an SUV that looks any good at all is the Chrysler Pacifica or the Acura MDX. The Escalade looks like it was designed in Bizarro World (think the Superman comic) with all those ridiculous angles. It looks like it was polygon rendered for a Power Point presentation with a low-end video card and just left that way as it went into production.

And then some of these idiots make it even worse by lowering them (and complaining about speed bumps) or adding spinning rims. Every time I see spinning rims, I laugh myself silly, pointing at them and guffawing wildly.

I long for the day when a vehicle is transportation. America allowed itself to "fall in love" with cars and that's the biggest hurdle with regard to dealing with oil dependency. A car doesn't get you laid, and even if it does, what kind of woman is that? I know I'm getting all Don Quixote here, but when might we expect cars to be what they are instead of substitutes for personalities?