NationStates Jolt Archive


The NS General "Muslim Rules"

Gauthier
27-06-2006, 17:34
I wonder if Godwin started out like this. Anyways, here's something I compiled based on recent observations. Too many to list them all, but here's a few:

The Muslim Rules

1) Any crime will be much more horrible and shocking than normal when it is revealed the perpetrator is Muslim.

1a) A misdemeanor is automatically downgraded to Capital Offense if it is revealed that the perpetrator is Muslim.

2) There is no problem in the world that cannot be solved by arresting, deporting, or simply killing Muslims.

3) Muslims are a Jihadist Hivemind. Even that adorable 2 week old baby in the crib is training to become a suicide bomber to cap yo' infidel ass. If one Muslim is thinking about killing Americans, it was based on a group consensus decision throughout The Collective, not an impulse of despair and desperation.

4) There will be world peace when Islam and all the Muslims in the world are dead. All the other religions in the world will realize that their own sectarian violence were a direct result of Muslim Mind Control Satellites that had been launched in secret and thus will begin the foundation of The United Federation of Planets.

5) Crime was non-existent before Islam was invented.

6) If you didn't get that promotion you worked hard for, it was a Muslim terrorist plot that did it.

7) If your car break down in the middle of nowhere, it's because a Muslim prayed to Allah to make your car break down in the middle of nowhere.

8) Muslims ambushed the United States with a sneak attack at Pearl Harbor on December 7th, 1941. A day that will live in infamy.

9) Muslims set up the iceberg that sank the Titanic.

10) It wasn't a giant asteroid that made the dinosaurs go extinct. Guess what did it.

11) Bill Clinton is a Muslim.

12) So are Cindy Sheehan and Michael Moore.

13) Muslims spit on soldiers returning home from Vietnam.

14) A single death is a tragedy. A single Muslim Death is Asymmetrical Warfare.

15) "Xenu" is what Scientologists call Allah so they don't get their asses capped.

16) Muslims caused the Dot Com Bubble, The Great Depression, The Lincoln Savings and Loan Scandal, etc. etc.

17) You might have heard about the Salem Witch Trials. What they didn't tell you in the history books is that accused "witches" upped the ante by claiming their accusers were Muslims.

18) When George W. Bush said Iraq had WMDs, he didn't mean "Weapons of Mass Destruction." He meant "Worshippers at Mosques, Damnit."

19) The Air Bag didn't take off as an automotive innovation until Muslims started learning how to drive.

20) Insurance premiums didn't take off until Muslims started learning how to drive either.

If you find any more "Muslim Facts," feel free to add them to this thread.

Disclaimer: If you take this too seriously and think I'm Islamaphobic, then you obviously haven't read all my posts in NSG and need to lighten up. If you take this too seriously and agree with everything I said, may God and Allah have mercy on your soul.
Drunk commies deleted
27-06-2006, 17:38
1) Accidental misspelling of Muslim as Moslem makes you a bigot.

2) Pointing out any crime or terrorist act commited by a Muslim makes you a bigot and a fascist.

3) Any criticism of the culture of any Islamic nation makes you a bigot, a fascist, and a nazi.

4) Any criticism of any individual or small group of immigrant Muslims makes you a bigot, fascist, nazi and a xenophobe.

5) Feel free to trash anyone or anything else.
Deep Kimchi
27-06-2006, 17:41
1) Accidental misspelling of Muslim as Moslem makes you a bigot.

2) Pointing out any crime or terrorist act commited by a Muslim makes you a bigot and a fascist.

3) Any criticism of the culture of any Islamic nation makes you a bigot, a fascist, and a nazi.

4) Any criticism of any individual or small group of immigrant Muslims makes you a bigot, fascist, nazi and a xenophobe.

5) Feel free to trash anyone or anything else.


Disagreeing with Gauthier or Assis on the subject of Muslims makes you a bigot, fascist, racist Nazi who sleeps with Himmler.
Andaluciae
27-06-2006, 17:43
I wonder of Godwin started out like this

Probably.
Teh_pantless_hero
27-06-2006, 17:45
All topics about Islamic terrorists will imply Islam is to blame and all Muslims are thusly evil.

Any random action of a Islamic terrorist must immediately be followed up by a broadcast on all channels of every television provided by non-extremists Muslims that all Muslims everywhere are sorry and those terrorists are not real Muslims, otherwise all Muslims are evil extremists.
Greater Alemannia
27-06-2006, 17:47
Disagreeing with Gauthier or Assis on the subject of Muslims makes you a bigot, fascist, racist Nazi who sleeps with Himmler.

Saying anything about muslims that is even remotely true makes you a bigot, fascist, racist Nazi who sleeps with Himmler and had a personal hand in the Holocaust.
Keruvalia
27-06-2006, 17:49
Saying that blowing up innocent men, women, and children is not part of Islam gets you 8 pages of Qur'an quotes from allmuslimshoulddie.com.
Swilatia
27-06-2006, 18:01
in my opinion there is no such thing asd a capital offense.
Swilatia
27-06-2006, 18:05
21) a protest its never a roit unless its started by muslims
Neo Kervoskia
27-06-2006, 18:08
http://www.lotusfs.co.uk/style/approved.JPG
Deep Kimchi
27-06-2006, 18:11
21) a protest its never a roit unless its started by muslims
No, no, that's British football fans...
Neo Kervoskia
27-06-2006, 18:12
No, no, that's British football fans...
But if one of those fans is Muslim, then's it's a hostage situation.
Neo Kervoskia
27-06-2006, 18:12
No, no, that's British football fans...
But if one of those fans is Muslim, then's it's a hostage situation.
Sinuhue
27-06-2006, 18:12
Muslims, despite being members of a religion and not an ethnicity, are nonetheless all swarthy or 'arabic' looking. (the white ones get a pass perhaps?)
Ny Nordland
27-06-2006, 18:19
1) Accidental misspelling of Muslim as Moslem makes you a bigot.

2) Pointing out any crime or terrorist act commited by a Muslim makes you a bigot and a fascist.

3) Any criticism of the culture of any Islamic nation makes you a bigot, a fascist, and a nazi.

4) Any criticism of any individual or small group of immigrant Muslims makes you a bigot, fascist, nazi and a xenophobe.

5) Feel free to trash anyone or anything else.

6) All majority muslim countries are progressive utopias.

7) Islam is the religion of peace.

8) Straw men shall be transformed to "satire" which isnt even funny and intelligent and light years away of being subtle....
Not bad
27-06-2006, 18:20
At first utterance of the word Muslim in a thread title Muslin bashers and Islam apologists will fall out to their respective sides and throw rocks mud and insults at eachother.


Zoroastrians and Mormons shall take bets and set odds on the outcome of the pissing match in the foyer.
Deep Kimchi
27-06-2006, 18:32
Muslims, despite being members of a religion and not an ethnicity, are nonetheless all swarthy or 'arabic' looking. (the white ones get a pass perhaps?)
No passes for the Chechens, sorry
Gravlen
27-06-2006, 18:36
Disagreeing with Gauthier or Assis on the subject of Muslims makes you a bigot, fascist, racist Nazi who sleeps with Himmler.
And here I thought the advocating of genocide might be the reason... Oh well.
Deep Kimchi
27-06-2006, 18:38
And here I thought the advocating of genocide might be the reason... Oh well.
I posited the genocide because it doesn't matter what you say to Gauthier - if you say anything bad about any Moslems, you're a racist fanatic.

So I am humoring him, so he will feel that he is fighting the forces of sadistic fascists everywhere.
Non Aligned States
27-06-2006, 18:44
I posited the genocide because it doesn't matter what you say to Gauthier - if you say anything bad about any Moslems, you're a racist fanatic.

So I am humoring him, so he will feel that he is fighting the forces of sadistic fascists everywhere.

Is that so? I seem to recall you more or less advocating two things.

1: That the US would be able to initiate a world conquest campaign and not somehow get turned into a blasted wasteland when it starts on the other nuclear powers, or even before that.

2: That genocide is an acceptable solution whenever there is a problem that hammers won't solve.

And that was in more than one thread.
Deep Kimchi
27-06-2006, 18:47
Is that so? I seem to recall you more or less advocating two things.

1: That the US would be able to initiate a world conquest campaign and not somehow get turned into a blasted wasteland when it starts on the other nuclear powers, or even before that.

2: That genocide is an acceptable solution whenever there is a problem that hammers won't solve.

And that was in more than one thread.
Yes. Actually, from a strictly theoretical viewpoint, it is possible to defeat the other nuclear powers. And genocide, while not nice, can be made to work.

And you underestimate the role that fear plays. A truly rogue US that was engaged in such acts would be more terrifying than any nation in history.

But I discuss these things as a matter of speculation. It's certainly more entertaining than listening to Gauthier's "moral" objections.
AllCoolNamesAreTaken
27-06-2006, 18:47
At first utterance of the word Muslim in a thread title Muslin bashers and Islam apologists will fall out to their respective sides and throw rocks mud and insults at eachother.


Zoroastrians and Mormons shall take bets and set odds on the outcome of the pissing match in the foyer.

All secretly controlled by the evil Jew banks, of course.
Non Aligned States
27-06-2006, 19:12
Yes. Actually, from a strictly theoretical viewpoint, it is possible to defeat the other nuclear powers. And genocide, while not nice, can be made to work.

From the nuclear power standpoint, Russia still has a few missile subs. And so does England. Pakistan and India have their own arsenals and so does China, even though the number of true intercontinental missiles on their part are limited.

In order to cut off the nuclear retaliation of the other powers, it has to be a decisive strike across the board with no chance of error or miss whatsoever.

All it takes is one boomer to launch. MIRVS will do the rest. After that, it's down to strategic bombers and land bases. Whoever's left can fight it out with the cockroaches.

An operation on this scale and level of perfection is impossible. I have absolute faith in the ability of the Pentagon or what have you to bungle this up beyond belief.


And you underestimate the role that fear plays. A truly rogue US that was engaged in such acts would be more terrifying than any nation in history.

Fear only serves to create two possible reactions. Flight/Fight. A truly rogue nation would find itself eventually cut off from much of the world, facing an alliance of convenience against it, and the prospects of a devastated world left behind.