NationStates Jolt Archive


British Army demotes goat

Aryavartha
26-06-2006, 17:16
:p This one's too funny...

http://www.deccan.com/home/homedetails.asp#British%20Army%20demotes%20goat?headline=British~Army~demotes~goat
London, June 25: A British Army regiment’s ceremonial pet goat was demoted in disgrace after it marched out of line before a host of international dignitaries during a parade to mark Queen Elizabeth II’s birthday, a military spokesman said on Saturday.

The military mascot, a six-year-old male goat called Billy, was downgraded from the rank of lance corporal to fusilier :( — the same status as a private — after Army chiefs ruled his poor display had ruined the ceremony on June 16 at a British army base in Episkopi, western Cyprus.

Lance Corporal Dai Davies, 22, the goat’s handler, was unable to keep control during the march earlier this month, as the mascot darted from side to side, throwing soldiers off their stride, spokesman Captain Crispian Coates said by telephone from Episkopi — one of two British bases on the island.

“The goat, which has been the regiment’s mascot since 2001, was supposed to be leading the march, but would not stay in line,” said Capt. Coates. “He was reported for insubordination and after
consideration, the commanding officer decided he had no option but to demote Billy.” Since his demotion, soldiers of a lower rank are no longer expected to salute Billy as a sign of respect, Capt. Coates said. Capt. William Rose, a soldier present at the parade, said the goat “was trying to headbutt the waist and nether regions of the drummers”:D .

The regiment, the 1st Battalion, The Royal Welsh, has travelled with a pet goat since soldiers adopted one of the animals during the Crimean War, awarding it ceremonial status as a lance corporal.
A total of 11 ceremonial pets — including a ferret, an Indian black buck and a ram — are kept by the British Army, but regiments do not take the mascots on tours to combat zones.

British legislators were told last month that keeping the pets costs £30,000 pounds per year. The Welsh regiment was presented with a goat from the Royal Herd in 1746, and Billy is a descendant from the same bloodline, said a spokeswoman for the ministry of defence, on customary condition of anonymity in line with policy. “He is not a grazing goat and has food flown in from Wales. Billy also has an allowance of two cigarettes a day — both of which he eats:confused: ,” said the spokeswoman.
Drunk commies deleted
26-06-2006, 17:21
What did the goat do in order to earn the rank of Lance Corporal to begin with?
Skinny87
26-06-2006, 17:22
Heh. More evidence to show British military superiority.

"The British Army: Where a Goat may outrank you."
[NS]Liasia
26-06-2006, 17:28
Hey, deja vu:eek:
Outcast Jesuits
26-06-2006, 17:31
Just eat the stupid goat. Hang its head on the wall. There's a sign of honor for you.
The White Hats
26-06-2006, 17:33
What did the goat do in order to earn the rank of Lance Corporal to begin with?
It appears to be a hereditary title. Welcome to Britain, where the distinction between aristocracy and farmyard animals can get a tad confused at times.
The Infinite Dunes
26-06-2006, 17:34
What did the goat do in order to earn the rank of Lance Corporal to begin with?He loaned the Labour party some cash, but he got ripped off as they only made him a lance corporal in the Army instead of a Lord. Or maybe his title is hereditary... PURE EVILNESS!
JuNii
26-06-2006, 17:36
Billy also has an allowance of two cigarettes a day — both of which he eatsdoesn't anyone think of that poor Goat's Health?!? :p
VanAtta
26-06-2006, 17:41
It said in there that they had a ferret and a black buck in the British army too...

I wouldn't really like to salute a ferret or a goat, not really my thing.:D
N Y C
26-06-2006, 17:45
I see your Lance Corporal and raise you a Mayor. (http://www.karlschatz.com/yearofthegoat/archives/000089.shtml)
Antikythera
26-06-2006, 18:13
:p i just died laughing..that is too great! i love the british
Swilatia
26-06-2006, 18:19
:) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :)
*dies laughing*
Yossarian Lives
26-06-2006, 18:31
I think it's absolutely disgusting the way the British army still has this double standard of treatment for these established military families. If anyone else had been caught touching the drummers' 'nether regions' during a parade without the excuse that their ancestors had been at Balaklava or Sebastopol they'd have been out on their ear, never mind a simple demotion.
Boonytopia
27-06-2006, 09:18
I think it's absolutely disgusting the way the British army still has this double standard of treatment for these established military families. If anyone else had been caught touching the drummers' 'nether regions' during a parade without the excuse that their ancestors had been at Balaklava or Sebastopol they'd have been out on their ear, never mind a simple demotion.

That's the house of Windsor for you though. ;)
Rambhutan
27-06-2006, 09:40
All seems perfectly normal to me. After all there is a penguin in the Norwegian army that is a Regimental Sergeant Major. Harrumph...nothing strange at all about us English.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/scotland/1495503.stm