NationStates Jolt Archive


NS Weights And Measures.

Lunatic Goofballs
24-06-2006, 16:11
Some of us use the old english measurements (inches, feet, quarts etc.) some of us use metrics(liters, meters, grams) and still others have to be different(furlongs, hogsheads, cubits).

I suggest that we settle on a universal set of measurements.

Let me be the first to suggest an NS Universal measurement of distance: The Smoot.

One Smoot is equal to 5 feet 7 inches or 1.7018 meters. For longer distances, we will go with the Kilosmoot which is equal to 1000 smoots or 1.0574 miles or 1.7018 kilometers.

The Smoot derives from MIT who used a fraternity pledge named Smoot to measure the Harvard Bridge by flipping him end-over-end for the entire length of the bridge(which measures 364.4 smoots). The Smoot became the semi-official measurement for the bridge when it was rennovated. Instead of scoring the new sidewalk every six feet, it is scored every 5 feet 7 inches.

I am 1.03 smoots tall. :)
Gun Manufacturers
24-06-2006, 16:19
I am 1.03 smoots tall. :)

You are a sad, strange little man, and you have my pity.*

I am 1.11940299 smoots tall.







*an e-cookie for the first person who gets that movie reference.
Neo Undelia
24-06-2006, 16:21
*an e-cookie for the first person who gets that movie reference.
Dude, Toy Story.
I V Stalin
24-06-2006, 16:21
I'm 0.99 smoots tall, or exactly one smoot when wearing my normal shoes. What's the symbol for a Smoot? Litre is L, kilogram is kg, smoot is...? S? Sm? S&m? Measuring needs a bit of kinkiness added...though there are numerous things you can get up to with metre sticks and tape measures...

*goes off for a cold shower*
Gun Manufacturers
24-06-2006, 16:27
Dude, Toy Story.

Here's an oatmeal cookie for you. http://members.allrecipes.com/community/Member/Photo.aspx?PhotoId=1764
Whithy Windle
24-06-2006, 16:51
Dude, you won't get everyone to follow you in your Smootiness. Some (or most) will stay with their original measurements and the situation will get worse.
Ill join though!(I am exactly 1 Smoot tall) What about mass and volume? Astronomical distences? Incredibly small distences?
Baguetten
24-06-2006, 16:54
No, thank you. Metrics and SI are already superior and used by most people on the planet. Even the "imperial" units are defined in SI, which means that even those who think they use "imperial" are just in fact using metric and SI.

So, I'll stick with the winners.
Lunatic Goofballs
24-06-2006, 17:00
No, thank you. Metrics and SI are already superior and used by most people on the planet. Even the "imperial" units are defined in SI, which means that even those who think they use "imperial" are just in fact using metric and SI.

So, I'll stick with the winners.

*Buries you 1.075 smoots under.*
Whithy Windle
24-06-2006, 17:00
No, thank you. Metrics and SI are already superior and used by most people on the planet. Even the "imperial" units are defined in SI, which means that even those who think they use "imperial" are just in fact using metric and SI.

So, I'll stick with the winners.
"Winners"? Ill grant that metric is vastly superior, as it was based on something other than someone's foot or hand (or body length). But Winners? We're just having fun. You know F-U-N fun. NS is a game we're supposed to have "fun".
Pure Metal
24-06-2006, 17:02
we should measure things in minute fractions of the size of czardas' ego ;)
Whithy Windle
24-06-2006, 17:02
*Buries you 1.075 smoots under.*
*Builds a dirt mound over him 1.075 smoots tall, plants daisies*
Whithy Windle
24-06-2006, 17:04
we should measure things in minute fractions of the size of czardas' ego ;)
Wouldn't the enormous effort be not worth the outcome? How about someone with a smaller ego?
Lunatic Goofballs
24-06-2006, 17:05
we should measure things in minute fractions of the size of czardas' ego ;)

Other than measuring the distances to remote galaxies, why would we need a reference that large? :confused:
Whithy Windle
24-06-2006, 17:09
Other than measuring the distances to remote galaxies, why would we need a reference that large? :confused:
That's it, that's it! Instead of the AU or light year, we'll have the CE (Czardas Ego)! <1,453.457 light years>
Andaluciae
24-06-2006, 17:12
I am proud to say I am 1.1 Smoots tall, without my shoes on!
The Reborn USA
24-06-2006, 17:13
what about molecular sizes?
Whithy Windle
24-06-2006, 17:14
what about molecular sizes?
Nanosmoot?
Again, what about mass and volume?
I V Stalin
24-06-2006, 17:19
Nanosmoot?
Again, what about mass and volume?
For volume, you can have the Smube - Smoot cube! :D
For mass, you can have the Woot - Weight (of) Smoot! :D :D
Lunatic Goofballs
24-06-2006, 17:25
I've been looking through volume and weight measurements and I haven't decided on volume but for weight I nominate:

The Pud(russian) =16.3 kilograms or 35.935 lbs.
Andaluciae
24-06-2006, 17:33
For weights in general, I might recommend that we opt for the "Pants" as a measure. To standardize this, I recommend we take the weight of a single pair of Khaki Pants (not cargo pants) with a 32 in waist, and a 32 inch leg. Fold them up and put them on a scale. Figure out the equivalency, and be able to use the pants as the new NS standard for weight.
The Coral Islands
24-06-2006, 17:39
I suggest that we settle on a universal set of measurements.
Loonygoof, we already did that... It's called SI (metric). There are just a few outlying countries that have yet to adopt it. Besides, if one wants to convert, it is easy to find nifty online applets that can do it lickety-split.
Whithy Windle
24-06-2006, 17:52
For volume, you can have the Smube - Smoot cube! :D
For mass, you can have the Woot - Weight (of) Smoot! :D :D
I second that! But how much does Smoot weigh?
Kanabia
24-06-2006, 17:54
I'm 0.99 smoots tall, or exactly one smoot when wearing my normal shoes. What's the symbol for a Smoot? Litre is L, kilogram is kg, smoot is...? S? Sm? S&m? Measuring needs a bit of kinkiness added...though there are numerous things you can get up to with metre sticks and tape measures...

*goes off for a cold shower*

Shortarse. :p

I'm roughly 1.065 smoots tall.
Whithy Windle
24-06-2006, 17:57
No tall people on here, eh?
Demented Hamsters
24-06-2006, 18:12
I'm 1.11 smoots.
Now what are we going to do for a standardised weight and what will we call it?
Laura Beach
24-06-2006, 19:14
Some of us use the old english measurements (inches, feet, quarts etc.) some of us use metrics(liters, meters, grams) and still others have to be different(furlongs, hogsheads, cubits).

I suggest that we settle on a universal set of measurements.

Let me be the first to suggest an NS Universal measurement of distance: The Smoot.

One Smoot is equal to 5 feet 7 inches or 1.7018 meters. For longer distances, we will go with the Kilosmoot which is equal to 1000 smoots or 1.0574 miles or 1.7018 kilometers.

The Smoot derives from MIT who used a fraternity pledge named Smoot to measure the Harvard Bridge by flipping him end-over-end for the entire length of the bridge(which measures 364.4 smoots). The Smoot became the semi-official measurement for the bridge when it was rennovated. Instead of scoring the new sidewalk every six feet, it is scored every 5 feet 7 inches.

I am 1.03 smoots tall. :)


You forgot the ear.
Ladamesansmerci
24-06-2006, 19:36
approximately 0.96956164061581854506992596074744 smoot tall...

I hate being short. :(
Gun Manufacturers
25-06-2006, 00:29
No tall people on here, eh?

As I said in my first post on this thread, I am 1.11940299 smoots (6'3") tall.
Haradwaich
25-06-2006, 00:35
How many smoots is 6' 1"?
Gartref
25-06-2006, 00:37
I'm about 0.15 smoots.
Super-power
25-06-2006, 00:38
I am 1.05970149 smoots tall.
Compulsive Depression
25-06-2006, 01:03
Before this thread I didn't know that a Hogshead was a unit of volume, let alone one equivalent to about 238.480943 litres.

Lunatic Goofballs, you have reduced my ignorance. Albeit entirely by accident :)
JuNii
25-06-2006, 01:33
I am 1.03 smoots tall. :)that sounds vaguely... obscene...

1.18 smoots tall.
IL Ruffino
25-06-2006, 01:43
Some of us use the old english measurements (inches, feet, quarts etc.) some of us use metrics(liters, meters, grams) and still others have to be different(furlongs, hogsheads, cubits).

I suggest that we settle on a universal set of measurements.

Let me be the first to suggest an NS Universal measurement of distance: The Smoot.

One Smoot is equal to 5 feet 7 inches or 1.7018 meters. For longer distances, we will go with the Kilosmoot which is equal to 1000 smoots or 1.0574 miles or 1.7018 kilometers.

The Smoot derives from MIT who used a fraternity pledge named Smoot to measure the Harvard Bridge by flipping him end-over-end for the entire length of the bridge(which measures 364.4 smoots). The Smoot became the semi-official measurement for the bridge when it was rennovated. Instead of scoring the new sidewalk every six feet, it is scored every 5 feet 7 inches.

I am 1.03 smoots tall. :)
In Boston!

I've seen this bridge!
Lunatic Goofballs
25-06-2006, 11:45
Before this thread I didn't know that a Hogshead was a unit of volume, let alone one equivalent to about 238.480943 litres.

Lunatic Goofballs, you have reduced my ignorance. Albeit entirely by accident :)

Well there's too much resistance when I try to reduce people's ignorance deliberately. I have to sneak in the back door. :)
Palaios
25-06-2006, 11:54
I'm 1.058 smoots tall :D
Keruvalia
25-06-2006, 12:01
You know F-U-N fun.

I'm sorry, thread, but this must be done ...

Sings:

F is for friends who do things together
U is for you and Me
N is for anywhere, anytime at all

Down here in the deep, blue sea!

http://www.djnite.co.uk/blog/spongebob.gif
Daistallia 2104
25-06-2006, 12:05
I am .97 smoots tall.

*Builds a dirt mound over him 1.075 smoots tall, plants daisies*

Why are you planting multiples of me?*

(A joke only a few will get.)
Turquoise Days
25-06-2006, 12:10
I'm sorry, thread, but this must be done ...

Sings:

F is for friends who do things together
U is for you and Me
N is for anywhere, anytime at all

Down here in the deep, blue sea!

http://www.djnite.co.uk/blog/spongebob.gif
*smacks Keru for using that abominable sponge in civilised conversation* :p

I'm 1.08Sm (3 s.f.) tall.
Whereyouthinkyougoing
25-06-2006, 12:22
I suck at maths. :( So bad I can't even figure out how many smoots tall I am.

I'm something like 1,65 meters. If anyone can figure out how much that is in smoots, I'll be happy to give them what's left of my smoot (i.e. my brain worked exactly long enough to know that I'm not even one smoot tall. Then, it shut down. :p).
Kanabia
25-06-2006, 12:34
I suck at maths. :( So bad I can't even figure out how many smoots tall I am.

I'm something like 1,65 meters. If anyone can figure out how much that is in smoots, I'll be happy to give them what's left of my smoot (i.e. my brain worked exactly long enough to know that I'm not even one smoot tall. Then, it shut down. :p).

The exact same as Ladame.
IL Ruffino
25-06-2006, 12:41
I'm sorry, thread, but this must be done ...

Sings:

F is for friends who do things together
U is for you and Me
N is for anywhere, anytime at all

Down here in the deep, blue sea!

http://www.djnite.co.uk/blog/spongebob.gif
YES YE YESYEWS YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

..

*coughs*

I actually based an entire essay on that song in english class.. I got an A!

Have a fluffle :fluffle:
Whereyouthinkyougoing
25-06-2006, 12:41
The exact same as Ladame.
Really?

But.. but... she said we were short. :(
approximately 0.96956164061581854506992596074744 smoot tall...

I hate being short. :(

We're so not short! Yay, 0.969ers! We rock! [/pep talk]

Thanks anyway for subbing as my calculator. You can have the rest of my smoot now. Brand new, never been used. :)
Strategic Grace
25-06-2006, 12:44
1.05263158 Smoots
Kanabia
25-06-2006, 12:46
Really?

But.. but... she said we were short. :(


We're so not short! Yay, 0.969ers! We rock! [/pep talk]

You aren't, really, but i'm known to consider only people under 1.6m as especially "short".

Thanks anyway for subbing as my calculator. You can have the rest of my smoot now. Brand new, never been used. :)

Woohoo :p

That would make me about 6'2"...nah, i'll pass. It'd be too difficult. :p
Peisandros
25-06-2006, 12:52
I think this is rightish..

1.0526315789473684210526315789474..

That's assuming im 6' which I think I am.
Whereyouthinkyougoing
25-06-2006, 12:54
You aren't, really, but i'm known to consider only people under 1.6m as especially "short".
Well, that's because they are especially short. :D Those 5 centimeters make all the difference. *nods self-delusionally*
Dryks Legacy
25-06-2006, 13:13
I'm 5' 10"/1.8m/1.04 smoots/0.000000000000000058 parsecs tall.
I V Stalin
25-06-2006, 13:32
I second that! But how much does Smoot weigh?
Erm...don't know. But a Woot can be the weight of one Smube of water, seeing as that's how a kilogram was worked out - the weight of the volume of water that is held in a 10cm cube.
I V Stalin
25-06-2006, 13:33
Shortarse. :p

I'm roughly 1.065 smoots tall.
*nuts Kanabia in the...nuts...* :p
Kanabia
25-06-2006, 13:36
*nuts Kanabia in the...nuts...* :p

you...nut me in my nuts? :p
Ladamesansmerci
25-06-2006, 17:49
Really?

But.. but... she said we were short. :(


We're so not short! Yay, 0.969ers! We rock! [/pep talk]

Thanks anyway for subbing as my calculator. You can have the rest of my smoot now. Brand new, never been used. :)
I do feel short, especially when towered over by 80% of the school. :(
Koon Proxy
25-06-2006, 17:55
So I'm 1.104 Smoots tall. Go me.
Layarteb
25-06-2006, 17:56
You are definitely a Lunatic Goofball but I will admire the effort and say, If it works, DUDE awesome!
Jindrak
25-06-2006, 17:58
Nah, I like meters. Much easier to use ^_^
Whereyouthinkyougoing
25-06-2006, 17:59
I do feel short, especially when towered over by 80% of the school. :(
At 1.65 meters? Canada - The Land of Giants! :eek:
I think that's actually pretty average for women.
Ladamesansmerci
25-06-2006, 18:03
At 1.65 meters? Canada - The Land of Giants! :eek:
I think that's actually pretty average for women.
Actually, I think it's THE average height for women in the world.

Canada, land of giants? erm...sure...It must be all the mixing of the blood. *smiles and nods and pretends she knows what she's talking about*
Not bad
25-06-2006, 18:03
I want metric time. They length of a day will still equal one rotation of the earth.
10 hours in a day, 100 minutes in an hour and 100 seconds in a minute. Might as well make a week 10 days long too.

The length of a year will still equal one orbit of the earth around the sun

10 months in a year, 5 of 36 days and 5 of 35 days. Leap days minutes and seconds as needed.
Bumboat
25-06-2006, 18:12
As I said in my first post on this thread, I am 1.11940299 smoots (6'3") tall.
Hey! we're the same height. :) Cool, now I'll mention in the ab tomorrow, "Did you know I'm around 1.12 smoots tall?" It'll freak them out for hours! Yay:D
Whereyouthinkyougoing
25-06-2006, 18:13
Actually, I think it's THE average height for women in the world.
Whew, thanks. I was starting to suddenly feel all small and towered-over.

Canada, land of giants? erm...sure...It must be all the mixing of the blood. *smiles and nods and pretends she knows what she's talking about* There, there. *pats*


Also - major damage-control announcement - I just figured out how to convert it and want to point out that I had no idea it was this frigging easy and I feel a tad retarded now and I just wanted to say that not even *I* am that bad at maths and it was just because I made all these majorly difficult calculations that ended up way too complicated for this simple feat.

Basically, what I'm saying is I'm just too damn smart for this measly task. :p


Yeah, that's the ticket. <.< *goes off to hide under a pillow*
Ladamesansmerci
25-06-2006, 18:18
Whew, thanks. I was starting to suddenly feel all small and towered-over.
Are you sure you aren't towered over? :eek:
There, there. *pats*
Do I get a cookie with that? :p

Also - major damage-control announcement - I just figured out how to convert it and want to point out that I had no idea it was this frigging easy and I feel a tad retarded now and I just wanted to say that not even *I* am that bad at maths and it was just because I made all these majorly difficult calculations that ended up way too complicated for this simple feat.

Basically, what I'm saying is I'm just too damn smart for this measly task. :p


Yeah, that's the ticket. <.< *goes off to hide under a pillow*
Come on, you know your intelligence is so overwhelming that we would all flee if in its presence. In fact, you have better hide it under the pillow in case we get blinded by the sheer intensity of it. :p
Bumboat
25-06-2006, 18:19
Whew, thanks. I was starting to suddenly feel all small and towered-over.

There, there. *pats*


Also - major damage-control announcement - I just figured out how to convert it and want to point out that I had no idea it was this frigging easy and I feel a tad retarded now and I just wanted to say that not even *I* am that bad at maths and it was just because I made all these majorly difficult calculations that ended up way too complicated for this simple feat.

Basically, what I'm saying is I'm just too damn smart for this measly task. :p


Yeah, that's the ticket. <.< *goes off to hide under a pillow*

Awww! *hugs and fluffles* :fluffle:
Swilatia
25-06-2006, 18:22
what about the units for mass and capacity.
Not bad
25-06-2006, 18:24
what about the units for mass and capacity.


Thats Phats law. The more you eat (capacity) the more you will weigh(mass).
Bumboat
25-06-2006, 18:26
I volunteer to be a unit of temperature. ;)
"Wow, its as hot as Bumboat outside!"
NilbuDcom
25-06-2006, 18:32
You will use Metric as ordained by your European masters!

There used to be a measure of land called the collop. A collop was the amount of livestock a piece of land could support x number of geese, y number of sheep, z number of cattle. That kind of thing. It meant much more than 100 acres, which could be 100 acres of verdant medow, or swamp, or rock.
Baked squirrels
25-06-2006, 18:41
I'm only 1.0746268 smoots tall
Whereyouthinkyougoing
25-06-2006, 18:45
Awww! *hugs and fluffles* :fluffle: Aw, thanks. :) *peeks out from under pillow*

Are you sure you aren't towered over? :eek: *looks up over shoulder* Not right now I'm not.

Do I get a cookie with that? :p Why yes, not pat could be complete without a cookie (http://www.cookiegarden.com/images/home_page_center/audrey_center.jpg). You don't mind it's used, do you?

Come on, you know your intelligence is so overwhelming that we would all flee if in its presence. In fact, you have better hide it under the pillow in case we get blinded by the sheer intensity of it. :pYes, I'm really bright, ain't I? *nod nod* I would blind you all, that's how bright I am, so I have to always keep the pillow really close around my head and hold it to my face real nice and close and tight, just like soooooo.........



.
Whereyouthinkyougoing
25-06-2006, 18:46
I volunteer to be a unit of temperature. ;)
"Wow, its as hot as Bumboat outside!"
Awesome. :p

And it really is as hot as Bumboat outside! :eek:
Sarkhaan
25-06-2006, 19:02
Shortarse. :p

I'm roughly 1.065 smoots tall.
I dub thee, stubs.

I'm 1.104 smoots.



and that bridge its the bane of my existance.
The Cathunters
25-06-2006, 19:08
I'm 1'004818428e Smoots tall. (Using a decimal numbers' scale)
I V Stalin
25-06-2006, 20:27
I want metric time.
Well, you're not going to get it. It sucks. And people are used to time being measured as it currently is, so it would just be a hassle to implement it.
Nadkor
25-06-2006, 20:59
I'm 1.04 smoots apparently. Go me.
Kanabia
25-06-2006, 21:04
Well, you're not going to get it. It sucks. And people are used to time being measured as it currently is, so it would just be a hassle to implement it.

Conservative.
Aurendia
25-06-2006, 21:06
I'm 1.03 Smoots.
Bumboat
25-06-2006, 21:06
Awesome. :p

And it really is as hot as Bumboat outside! :eek:
Wow! :)
thanks! :fluffle:
Ladamesansmerci
25-06-2006, 21:17
*looks up over shoulder* Not right now I'm not.
well, what if I put you right next to Shaq?
Why yes, not pat could be complete without a cookie (http://www.cookiegarden.com/images/home_page_center/audrey_center.jpg). You don't mind it's used, do you?
Oh great, now I have to fight the little boy for the cookie. *waves around spatula of doom menacingly*
Yes, I'm really bright, ain't I? *nod nod* I would blind you all, that's how bright I am, so I have to always keep the pillow really close around my head and hold it to my face real nice and close and tight, just like soooooo.........




.
Me think'st I hear the men protesting that they can't see your face anymore. :p *sigh* I guess they're all masochists who want to be blinded by your beauty and intelligence. *nods sagely*
Bumboat
25-06-2006, 21:36
well, what if I put you right next to Shaq?

Oh great, now I have to fight the little boy for the cookie. *waves around spatula of doom menacingly*

Me think'st I hear the men protesting that they can't see your face anymore. :p *sigh* I guess they're all masochists who want to be blinded by your beauty and intelligence. *nods sagely*
Even I would feel tiny next to Shaq, and I'm 1.12 smoots tall. :)
Not only the men. ;) But at least I have shades on. :cool:
Whereyouthinkyougoing
25-06-2006, 21:44
well, what if I put you right next to Shaq?
Pfffft, I'd headbutt him into the groin (ewww) and he would so be going down. We'll see who towers over whom, then. :cool:

Oh great, now I have to fight the little boy for the cookie. *waves around spatula of doom menacingly* Don't worry, I picked a weak one, especially for you. A quick swat will do the job. *nods*

Me think'st I hear the men protesting that they can't see your face anymore. :p *sigh* I guess they're all masochists who want to be blinded by your beauty and intelligence. *nods sagely*Not only the men. ;) But at least I have shades on.:cool:
Oh yes. Absolutely. I can hardly leave the house anymore and people are already running away screaming. :cool:

What, you mean that isn't because of my beauty and intelligence?

Rats. *shuffles off kicking dust*
Ladamesansmerci
25-06-2006, 22:05
Pfffft, I'd headbutt him into the groin (ewww) and he would so be going down. We'll see who towers over whom, then. :cool:
Wow, towering over Shaq. That is an amazing feat indeed. *hats off to WYTYG*
Don't worry, I picked a weak one, especially for you. A quick swat will do the job. *nods*
:eek: You under-estimate me! I wanted a good battle for the cookies, but you give me a weak little boy? Find me a new opponent; he is not worthy!

Oh yes. Absolutely. I can hardly leave the house anymore and people are already running away screaming. :cool:

What, you mean that isn't because of my beauty and intelligence?

Rats. *shuffles off kicking dust*
No, it is because of your uber-awesome power to read minds! :eek:

(don't ask me how that works...)
Bakamongue
25-06-2006, 23:30
I say we should use the following standard units:

length The Butterdown
This is the optimum height of a table from which a standard slice of bread (details of which need to be finalised) covered on the topside by a standard spread of butter (ditto) will fall from the edge of so as to perform an exactly 180 degree rotation before landing on a standard Very Expensive Carpet.
mass The napple
Based upon the weight of an apple. That's around 0.3lbs or 136 grams. The earth weighs around 44 yottonapples (yotta = 10^24, really, look it up), which means that for every metre an apple falls to Earth, the Earth (roughly, simplyifying madly) moves a little over 0.02 yoctometres (yocto = 10^-24, again I'm not making it up) towards the apple. (I'm only using metres, here because 1 butterdown vs 0.02 yoctobutterdowns might be less well understood.)
time The Fortnight
One millifortnight is around 1.2 seconds in the current standard.
electric current The Ouch
quite simply,the point at which a current ellicits an 'ouch' instead of an 'ooh, that tingles'). Details to be finalised.
thermodynamic temperature The Calvin
I want to base this upon a scale defined upon one 24th of the temperature difference between that at/below which someone turns on the central heating to the one at/above which the same person thinks about getting some ice from the freezer (but zero at absolute zero, of course, as per Kelvin, et al), for no particular reason other than I think it'd be fun.
amount of substance The Mote
A mote is based upon the average household dust particle, when modelled as a replica in carbon nanotubing and counting the number of carbon atoms therein. Why? Why not?
luminous intensity The Devil
The strength of a standard single-pulse electronic flash required to induce unmistakable 'red eyes' upon a subject 1 butterdown from it.


Ok, so I admit there are a few faults with the above, but I'm sure we could tie those down with enough funding and experimentation and funding and time. And funding.
Turquoise Days
25-06-2006, 23:32
<snip>

Ok, so I admit there are a few faults with the above, but I'm sure we could tie those down with enough funding and experimentation and funding and time. And funding.*tastes*

Needs more funding. :p
Lunatic Goofballs
25-06-2006, 23:34
You are definitely a Lunatic Goofball but I will admire the effort and say, If it works, DUDE awesome!

If noting else, I have reawakened the Smoot. :)
Lunatic Goofballs
25-06-2006, 23:39
I say we should use the following standard units:

length The Butterdown
This is the optimum height of a table from which a standard slice of bread (details of which need to be finalised) covered on the topside by a standard spread of butter (ditto) will fall from the edge of so as to perform an exactly 180 degree rotation before landing on a standard Very Expensive Carpet.
mass The napple
Based upon the weight of an apple. That's around 0.3lbs or 136 grams. The earth weighs around 44 yottonapples (yotta = 10^24, really, look it up), which means that for every metre an apple falls to Earth, the Earth (roughly, simplyifying madly) moves a little over 0.02 yoctometres (yocto = 10^-24, again I'm not making it up) towards the apple. (I'm only using metres, here because 1 butterdown vs 0.02 yoctobutterdowns might be less well understood.)
time The Fortnight
One millifortnight is around 1.2 seconds in the current standard.
electric current The Ouch
quite simply,the point at which a current ellicits an 'ouch' instead of an 'ooh, that tingles'). Details to be finalised.
thermodynamic temperature The Calvin
I want to base this upon a scale defined upon one 24th of the temperature difference between that at/below which someone turns on the central heating to the one at/above which the same person thinks about getting some ice from the freezer (but zero at absolute zero, of course, as per Kelvin, et al), for no particular reason other than I think it'd be fun.
amount of substance The Mote
A mote is based upon the average household dust particle, when modelled as a replica in carbon nanotubing and counting the number of carbon atoms therein. Why? Why not?
luminous intensity The Devil
The strength of a standard single-pulse electronic flash required to induce unmistakable 'red eyes' upon a subject 1 butterdown from it.


Ok, so I admit there are a few faults with the above, but I'm sure we could tie those down with enough funding and experimentation and funding and time. And funding.

You make me happy. :)
Turquoise Days
25-06-2006, 23:41
If noting else, I have reawakened the Smoot. :)
Hah! Google calculator recognises smoots! And according to Wiki, it's an optional unit of measurement on GoogleEarth. *runs off to try it*
Daistallia 2104
26-06-2006, 04:33
Hah! Google calculator recognises smoots! And according to Wiki, it's an optional unit of measurement on GoogleEarth. *runs off to try it*

Indeed it does. And to correct my earlier calculation, I am 0.985074627 smoots tall.
Frisbeeteria
26-06-2006, 05:23
Can somebody get me the correct mass of a "metric shitload"? I've been looking for that for some time now. Also, exactly how many units comprise 'a clusterfuck', as in "man, there sure are a clusterfuck of anime geeks at this convention."

Enquiring minds want to know.
Bumboat
26-06-2006, 05:27
Hah! Google calculator recognises smoots! And according to Wiki, it's an optional unit of measurement on GoogleEarth. *runs off to try it*

It tells me I am 1.11940299 smoots tall. :)
Daistallia 2104
26-06-2006, 05:33
Can somebody get me the correct mass of a "metric shitload"? I've been looking for that for some time now. Also, exactly how many units comprise 'a clusterfuck', as in "man, there sure are a clusterfuck of anime geeks at this convention."

Enquiring minds want to know.

A metric shitload is roughly 2.287 english shitloads.
Bumboat
26-06-2006, 05:54
Originally Posted by Frisbeeteria
Can somebody get me the correct mass of a "metric shitload"? I've been looking for that for some time now. Also, exactly how many units comprise 'a clusterfuck', as in "man, there sure are a clusterfuck of anime geeks at this convention."

Enquiring minds want to know.

Daistalia
A metric shitload is roughly 2.287 english shitloads.

And 13 fucks in a clusterfuck
Daistallia 2104
26-06-2006, 06:02
And I may have missed it, but I don't think anyone's mentioned the interesting fact that young master Smoots later went on to become the president of the ISO....
Czardas
26-06-2006, 06:08
I am, apparently, 1.041 smoots tall. Although that will probably change in a year or two based on family history.

we should measure things in minute fractions of the size of czardas' ego ;)
I can't see how that would be useful, as the area of space occupied by your universe is such a minute fraction of the total CE that it is, effectively, zero -- even less than your chances of winning the lottery if you fail to send in a lottery ticket...
Czardas
26-06-2006, 06:10
A metric shitload is roughly 2.287 english shitloads.
Actually, it's closer to 2.29426733019. Google said it so it must be true.
Sarkhaan
26-06-2006, 06:30
Actually, it's closer to 2.29426733019. Google said it so it must be true.
I thought a metric shitload was equal to 1.39 fucktons...
Czardas
26-06-2006, 06:35
I thought a metric shitload was equal to 1.39 fucktons...
It's 1.39 fucktonnes, 1.61 fucktons.
Lunatic Goofballs
26-06-2006, 07:15
How much is in a plethora?
Sarkhaan
26-06-2006, 07:20
It's 1.39 fucktonnes, 1.61 fucktons.
OOOOOhhhhhhhh...my mistake.

How much is in a plethora?
A plethora is equal to .64 craploads
Bumboat
27-06-2006, 06:47
Hey LG! I have to thank you. Futzing about in this thread gave me an idea for work. :) A very useful one. :D Thanks!
:cool:
I V Stalin
27-06-2006, 12:03
Conservative.
I just don't want to be like the French.
Harlesburg
27-06-2006, 13:59
Tag
Harlesburg
28-06-2006, 06:51
*Pumps fist in air 3 times*
Yes thread killer!
Harlesburg
28-06-2006, 06:53
Some of us use the old english measurements (inches, feet, quarts etc.) some of us use metrics(liters, meters, grams) and still others have to be different(furlongs, hogsheads, cubits).

I suggest that we settle on a universal set of measurements.

Let me be the first to suggest an NS Universal measurement of distance: The Smoot.

One Smoot is equal to 5 feet 7 inches or 1.7018 meters. For longer distances, we will go with the Kilosmoot which is equal to 1000 smoots or 1.0574 miles or 1.7018 kilometers.

The Smoot derives from MIT who used a fraternity pledge named Smoot to measure the Harvard Bridge by flipping him end-over-end for the entire length of the bridge(which measures 364.4 smoots). The Smoot became the semi-official measurement for the bridge when it was rennovated. Instead of scoring the new sidewalk every six feet, it is scored every 5 feet 7 inches.

I am 1.03 smoots tall. :)
Kudos...
Lunatic Goofballs
28-06-2006, 07:03
Hey LG! I have to thank you. Futzing about in this thread gave me an idea for work. :) A very useful one. :D Thanks!
:cool:

I've been useful?!?

:(
Daistallia 2104
28-06-2006, 07:30
I've been useful?!?

:(

You're always useful. :D
Posi
28-06-2006, 07:33
Tag
Heeeh, loser.
Harlesburg
28-06-2006, 08:19
Heeeh, loser.
:eek: :confused: :(
I agree i wasted my time doing that i tohught this thread would actually be worth my time reading the OP evidently it wasn't.

But just so you know you Syrup ozzing Canuck bastard, i've posted so much the last two days by not taging things for later i might never reply.:rolleyes:
Maineiacs
28-06-2006, 08:27
1.06 smoots tall.
Swilatia
28-06-2006, 09:05
I say we should use the following standard units:

length The Butterdown
This is the optimum height of a table from which a standard slice of bread (details of which need to be finalised) covered on the topside by a standard spread of butter (ditto) will fall from the edge of so as to perform an exactly 180 degree rotation before landing on a standard Very Expensive Carpet.
mass The napple
Based upon the weight of an apple. That's around 0.3lbs or 136 grams. The earth weighs around 44 yottonapples (yotta = 10^24, really, look it up), which means that for every metre an apple falls to Earth, the Earth (roughly, simplyifying madly) moves a little over 0.02 yoctometres (yocto = 10^-24, again I'm not making it up) towards the apple. (I'm only using metres, here because 1 butterdown vs 0.02 yoctobutterdowns might be less well understood.)
time The Fortnight
One millifortnight is around 1.2 seconds in the current standard.
electric current The Ouch
quite simply,the point at which a current ellicits an 'ouch' instead of an 'ooh, that tingles'). Details to be finalised.
thermodynamic temperature The Calvin
I want to base this upon a scale defined upon one 24th of the temperature difference between that at/below which someone turns on the central heating to the one at/above which the same person thinks about getting some ice from the freezer (but zero at absolute zero, of course, as per Kelvin, et al), for no particular reason other than I think it'd be fun.
amount of substance The Mote
A mote is based upon the average household dust particle, when modelled as a replica in carbon nanotubing and counting the number of carbon atoms therein. Why? Why not?
luminous intensity The Devil
The strength of a standard single-pulse electronic flash required to induce unmistakable 'red eyes' upon a subject 1 butterdown from it.


Ok, so I admit there are a few faults with the above, but I'm sure we could tie those down with enough funding and experimentation and funding and time. And funding.
actually thats a microfortnight.
NilbuDcom
28-06-2006, 09:11
VAX bootup timing was specified in microfortnights.
Swilatia
28-06-2006, 09:27
I think we should change the way time is measured. 100000 seconds in a day, so 1 new second would be 0.86 old seconds. then for the units in between it would be:
1000 seconds = 1 kilosecond (14.4 old minutes)
10 kiloseconds = one (new) hour (2.4 old hours
10 hours= 1 day (same as one day in todays system)

so, what do you think of this?
Swilatia
28-06-2006, 09:27
VAX bootup timing was specified in microfortnights.
huh??
Dryks Legacy
28-06-2006, 09:58
This thread lost it's way somewhere. It was around the same time I gave my height in metres, feet, smoots AND parsecs, but that's probably just a coincidence. :p
Bakamongue
28-06-2006, 12:43
actually thats a microfortnight.You are right.

That's why I need FUNDING!