NationStates Jolt Archive

This is a list of some real similies and metaphors that high school students have come up with. Priceless. Now create your own!

1. Her face was a perfect oval, like a circle that had its two sides
gently compressed by a Thigh Master.

2. His thoughts tumbled in his head, making and breaking alliances like
underpants in a dryer without Cling Free.

3. He spoke with the wisdom that can only come from experience, like a
guy who went blind because he looked at a solar eclipse without one of
those boxes with a pinhole in it and now goes around the country
speaking at high schools about the dangers of looking at a solar
eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it.

4. She grew on him like a colony of E. Coli, and he was
room-temperature Canadian beef.

5. She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a dog makes
just before it throws up.

6. Her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever.

7. He was as tall as a six-foot, three-inch tree.

8. The revelation that his marriage of 30 years had disintegrated
*because of his wife's infidelity came as a rude shock, like a
surcharge at a formerly surcharge-free ATM machine.

9. The little boat gently drifted across the pond exactly the way a
bowling ball wouldn't.

10. McBride fell 12 stories, hitting the pavement like a Hefty bag
filled with vegetable soup.

11. From the attic came an unearthly howl. The whole scene had an
eerie, surreal quality, like when you're on vacation in another city
and Jeopardy comes on at 7:00 p.m. instead of 7:30.

12. Her hair glistened in the rain like a nose hair after a sneeze.

13. The hailstones leaped from the pavement, just like maggots when you
fry them in hot grease.

14. Long separated by cruel fate, the star-crossed lovers raced across
the grassy field toward each other like two freight trains, one having
left Cleveland at 6:36 p.m. traveling at 55 mph, the other from Topeka
at 4:19 pm. at a speed of 35 mph.

15. They lived in a typical suburban neighborhood with picket fences
that resembled Nancy Kerrigan's teeth.

16. John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who
had *also never met.

17. He fell for her like his heart was a mob informant, and she was the
East River.

18. Even in his last years, Granddad had a mind like a steel trap, only
one that had been left out so long, it had rusted shut.

19. Shots rang out, as shots are wont to do.

20. The plan was simple, like my brother-in-law Phil. But unlike Phil,
this plan just might work.

21. The young fighter had a hungry look, the kind you get from not
eating for a while.

22. He was as lame as a duck. Not the metaphorical lame duck, either,
but a real duck that was actually lame, maybe from stepping on a land
mine or something.

23. The ballerina rose gracefully en Pointe and extended one slender
leg behind her, like a dog at a fire hydrant.

24. It was an American tradition, like fathers chasing kids around with
power tools.

25. He was deeply in love. When she spoke, he thought he heard bells,
as if she were a garbage truck backing up.

Love is a fungus, and he was the world's sweatiest lockerroom floor...

Awesome!

He was as angry as Eutrusca being forced to attend an anti-war rally!

She was an itch he couldn't scratch, like being in a full body cast and having ants race up your pant legs.

I've always wanted to see sex as a metaphor for trains going in tunnels.

I like some of the ones on that list, they're cool. I mean, c'mon-how can you not like this:
2. His thoughts tumbled in his head, making and breaking alliances like
underpants in a dryer without Cling Free.
or
6. Her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever.
or
19. Shots rang out, as shots are wont to do.
or
22. He was as lame as a duck. Not the metaphorical lame duck, either,
but a real duck that was actually lame, maybe from stepping on a land
mine or something.


I want to read more of these student's works.

I know...these are too good to be happenstance...I like the quirky analogies...I can just imagine the rest of their prose!

6. Her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever.
Classic.

This is a list of some real similies and metaphors that high school students have come up with. Priceless. Now create your own!

1. Her face was a perfect oval, like a circle that had its two sides
gently compressed by a Thigh Master.

2. His thoughts tumbled in his head, making and breaking alliances like
underpants in a dryer without Cling Free.

3. He spoke with the wisdom that can only come from experience, like a
guy who went blind because he looked at a solar eclipse without one of
those boxes with a pinhole in it and now goes around the country
speaking at high schools about the dangers of looking at a solar
eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it.

4. She grew on him like a colony of E. Coli, and he was
room-temperature Canadian beef.

5. She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a dog makes
just before it throws up.

6. Her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever.

7. He was as tall as a six-foot, three-inch tree.

8. The revelation that his marriage of 30 years had disintegrated
*because of his wife's infidelity came as a rude shock, like a
surcharge at a formerly surcharge-free ATM machine.

9. The little boat gently drifted across the pond exactly the way a
bowling ball wouldn't.

10. McBride fell 12 stories, hitting the pavement like a Hefty bag
filled with vegetable soup.

11. From the attic came an unearthly howl. The whole scene had an
eerie, surreal quality, like when you're on vacation in another city
and Jeopardy comes on at 7:00 p.m. instead of 7:30.

12. Her hair glistened in the rain like a nose hair after a sneeze.

13. The hailstones leaped from the pavement, just like maggots when you
fry them in hot grease.

14. Long separated by cruel fate, the star-crossed lovers raced across
the grassy field toward each other like two freight trains, one having
left Cleveland at 6:36 p.m. traveling at 55 mph, the other from Topeka
at 4:19 pm. at a speed of 35 mph.

15. They lived in a typical suburban neighborhood with picket fences
that resembled Nancy Kerrigan's teeth.

16. John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who
had *also never met.

17. He fell for her like his heart was a mob informant, and she was the
East River.

18. Even in his last years, Granddad had a mind like a steel trap, only
one that had been left out so long, it had rusted shut.

19. Shots rang out, as shots are wont to do.

20. The plan was simple, like my brother-in-law Phil. But unlike Phil,
this plan just might work.

21. The young fighter had a hungry look, the kind you get from not
eating for a while.

22. He was as lame as a duck. Not the metaphorical lame duck, either,
but a real duck that was actually lame, maybe from stepping on a land
mine or something.

23. The ballerina rose gracefully en Pointe and extended one slender
leg behind her, like a dog at a fire hydrant.

24. It was an American tradition, like fathers chasing kids around with
power tools.

25. He was deeply in love. When she spoke, he thought he heard bells,
as if she were a garbage truck backing up.
I've seen this list before. It's the list of things that kill English teachers. I kinda like the lame duck one and the maggots frying in hot grease. Funny stuff. I'd never seriously write them, though. Then again, I rarely write seriously.

This is a list of some real similies and metaphors that high school students have come up with. Priceless. Now create your own!

5. She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a dog makes
just before it throws up.

6. Her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever.

7. He was as tall as a six-foot, three-inch tree.

14. Long separated by cruel fate, the star-crossed lovers raced across
the grassy field toward each other like two freight trains, one having
left Cleveland at 6:36 p.m. traveling at 55 mph, the other from Topeka
at 4:19 pm. at a speed of 35 mph.
16. John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who
had *also never met.

17. He fell for her like his heart was a mob informant, and she was the
East River.

18. Even in his last years, Granddad had a mind like a steel trap, only
one that had been left out so long, it had rusted shut.

19. Shots rang out, as shots are wont to do.

21. The young fighter had a hungry look, the kind you get from not
eating for a while.

22. He was as lame as a duck. Not the metaphorical lame duck, either,
but a real duck that was actually lame, maybe from stepping on a land
mine or something.

23. The ballerina rose gracefully en Pointe and extended one slender
leg behind her, like a dog at a fire hydrant.

24. It was an American tradition, like fathers chasing kids around with
power tools.


hehe! i love these ones, especially 17 as that was my haloween costume last year - and i pulled :D so it's not as poor a similie as you might imagine!

surely some of these were intended to be funny rather than just kids being stupid?

how about: he leapt on his bike and raced out of the woods like last night's curry left my bowels this morning.
lowering the tone, my forte! :P

There aren't actually any metaphors on your list, Sinuhue. It's all similies.

A metaphor is more like... Love is cat's breath that hungers for succulent fish.

There aren't actually any metaphors on your list, Sinuhue. It's all similies.

A metaphor is more like... Love is cat's breath that hungers for succulent fish.
It's really more of an invitation to create your own horrible metaphor, methinks.

6. Her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever.

*has a grand mal seizure*

*has a grand mal seizure*
*hesitates to attempt resuscitation*

*hesitates to attempt resuscitation*

Grand mal seizures require no resuscitation. Shows what you know.

Grand mal seizures require no resuscitation. Shows what you know.

Fass lost all bowel control, as a river overruns a dam.

Grand mal seizures require no resuscitation. Shows what you know.
Bah! You missed the point. I hesitated to try, something people might do for those of importance.

Bah! You missed the point. I hesitated to try, something people might do for those of importance.

"Help" from your ilk is declined kindly, but firmly, seeing as one is, as in the case of grand mal, a lot better off without it.

None of my own come to mind at the moment. I really should start writing them down.

But here are some of my favorites from PTerry Pratchett.

"It was a city that was as bright as an oil slick, as colorful as a bruise, and as full of life, bustle, and sheer exhuberant busy-ness as a dead dog on a termite mount."

"The city was known as the Pearl of the Circle Sea. And as metaphors go, you couldn't get much better than comparing it to the diseased secretions of a dying mullosk."

"Parallel universes aren't really parallel. They tumble, spiral, and spin around eachother like a squadron full of Yosarians with middle ear trouble." (Yosarian being the pilot from Catch 22)

"Help" from your ilk is declined kindly, but firmly, seeing as one is, as in the case of grand mal, a lot better off without it.
LOL I never offered.

LOL I never offered.

You'd never be asked, so one understands your certainty of rejection.

You'd never be asked, so one understands your certainty of rejection.
LMAO That's okay. I'm used to all sorts of rejection by now. But that's a new one I'm not willing to inspire.

LMAO That's okay. I'm used to all sorts of rejection by now.

Now, there's a shocker.

But that's a new one I'm not willing to inspire.

And one the rest of us are all too willing not to have to expire.

Now, there's a shocker.



And one the rest of use are all too willing not to have to expire.
Well, as funny as that all is....
*looks around for on-topic ideas*

Well, as funny as that all is....
*looks around for on-topic ideas*

Fascist Dominion ran with his tail between his legs like a wolf having lost a hierarchical advancement scuffle within the herd.

Fascist Dominion ran with his tail between his legs like a wolf having lost a hierarchical advancement scuffle within the herd.
No good. That's actually a good similie. Although I recognize no such scuffle here, it has happened in the past.

The scene of the murder looked like the aftermath of a tanker full of meatballs in sauce colliding with an inner-city abortion clinic.

That margin of error is wider than Fern Britton's arse-crack.

As Douglas Adams once said, "It hung in the air in the same way in which bricks do not."

Another generic one... "They picked over him like vegans at a Mongolian barbecue."

6. Her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever.


Fantastic.

There aren't actually any metaphors on your list, Sinuhue. It's all similies. I know it, and I suppose I shouldn't have said these are a list of similies and metaphors...but I WANT metaphors...they are usually better than similies.

A metaphor is more like... Love is cat's breath that hungers for succulent fish.
Excellent!

His face was that of Mount Rushmore.

The window glistened like it had just been carefully handwashed by Mr. Clean.

a man fell of a cliff like a dog fallin goff the cliff, only with more screamage

Originally Posted by Willamena
A metaphor is more like... Love is cat's breath that hungers for succulent fish.
Excellent!
I know, it works on so many levels. :D

I finally have one!

My ego is as insatiable as a child's appetite for sweets...or Red Bull.

Haha... reminds me of the lines I collected from past History 12 provincials. The essay sections are full of surprises. :p Including a couple very bad similes.


"The beginning of the 20th century has been the turn of the century for most, if not all countries."

"Communism is a disease like mono. It takes a string of events like colds until your emuno-system is down on your economy."

"WWII involved a lot of communist countries like Britain, France, and the USA."

"The Russians overthrew their contagious dictators, the Sars."

"Lenin created the NDP."

"OK, that's all I know. The Suez Crisis isn't my forte. Just give me the 8 marks."

"Stand up. Stretch. Grab something to eat. Something yummy that you will enjoy. Get comfortable. Now mark this good."

"The Americans consistently intervened in many problems of the world. This was called isolationism."

"If Iraq could grow broccoli, there'd be no conflicts."

"The Middle East is like the milk man. If he doesn't give you milk on your cereal, you have to use water."

She had a memory like a stainless steel sieve.

She had a memory like a stainless steel sieve.
I don't think that qualifies....

The book was full of words like a picturebook is full of pictures except these were words.

She had pefect aim, like how a calculator always gets the right answer if you press the right numbers.

The two dancers were perfectly in sync with each other, unlike the school band.

Tariffs are barriers to trade just like import duties.

As the lovers gently drifted across the beach the soft carpet of golden sand, warmed by the now-setting sun, was like jello between their toes.

I don't think that qualifies....

It's a simile - likening her memory to a steel seive. Oh never mind.

It's a simile - likening her memory to a steel seive. Oh never mind.
But it's a good similie....

This topic brings to mind the editorial excellence often associated with the richness of rose-bouquetish flatulent emmissions during a severe barometric inversion.

This topic brings to mind the editorial excellence often associated with the richness of rose-bouquetish flatulent emmissions during a severe barometric inversion.

This post brings to mind mime-like memories of a certain poster's incisive observations during a time like the one in which grammar nazis roamed and frying pans flew at the empty craniums of fluffiness.

This post brings to mind mime-like memories of a certain poster's incisive observations during a time like the one in which grammar nazis roamed and frying pans flew at the empty craniums of fluffiness.
:D http://www.mahjqa.com/stuff/grammarnazi.gif

As the large woman trundled away her pants moved like Fascist Dominion, Fass, and a medium sized wolverine wrestling in a stretchy green pastel polyester bag.

As the large woman trundled away her pants moved like Fascist Dominion, Fass, and a medium sized wolverine wrestling in a stretchy green pastel polyester bag.
So far, I think you win for worst similie yet.;)

The hot chocolate tasted like melted chocolate in a milky substance.

Sorry - couldn't help it!

The hot chocolate tasted like melted chocolate in a milky substance.

Sorry - couldn't help it!
You couldn't help it like I can't help acting overdramatic sometimes like some sort of...of...drama queen who isn't a queen at all, but rather a king because of differing physiology.

If it took me this long, you know it's going to suck. Whatever, I'm doing it anyway...

"Her love was a dam that held back the passing river that was 'him.' But the reservoir had proven too much, stifling the rich banks that had once been his guide, and she had become worn from a lack of maintenance. Her gates had long since rusted open, allowing him to flow wilder than before towards the waiting ocean of freedom, and he dam road that let people across without having to go around was frequently closed. The construction was a public works program that had long since ceased to bear fruit."

EDIT:This is from a real review of the movie Cars (not to be confused with The Car, for those who both managed to avoid the Disney marketing onslaught and know about this partially obscure cult car based horror movie...):
"It's powered by a human heart through a roadway of natural wonders and cultural signposts en route to the checkered flag."