NationStates Jolt Archive

I know this seems like http://smilies.vidahost.com/contrib/tweetz/spam1.gif, but it isn't. You can put it in http://smilies.vidahost.com/contrib/tweetz/spam1.gif, but DO NOT DELETE.

I recently got a joke book called "3650 Jokes, Puns, & Riddles". And, it lives up to it's name.

I'll tell a joke:
A doctor joke:
Patient: I ate clams for the first time in my life yesterday and now i'm sick.
Doctor: Maybe they were bad. When you opened the shells, how did the clams look?
Patient: Opened them?

I are clams?

Meh, this is a real l33t j0k3:
"There are 10 types of people in this world. People who understand binary, and those who don't." :D

I are clams?

That would make you ill, yes.
An inflatable boy walks into his school with a pin ans starts popping stuff- tables, chairs, people. So everyone is distraught and he gets taken to the headmaster's office. The inflatable heamaster sits him down, looking very severe and says 'How could you do this, youv'e let your parents down, youv'e lets your school down, you've let me down'.:rolleyes:

Here's another l337 joke:

A boy opened his fridge and found a rabbit lounging in the butter dish.
Boy: what are you doing in there?
Rabbit: Isn't this a Westinghouse?
Boy: As a matter of fact, it is.
Rabbit: Well i'm westing!

http://smilies.vidahost.com/contrib/lilly/hmm3grin2orange.gif

lulz at u n00bs

Here's another l337 joke:

A boy opened his fridge and found a rabbit lounging in the butter dish.
Boy: what are you doing in there?
Rabbit: Isn't this a Westinghouse?
Boy: As a matter of fact, it is.
Rabbit: Well i'm westing!

http://smilies.vidahost.com/contrib/lilly/hmm3grin2orange.gif


Boooooo!

Ok yes, I giggled.

q: how do you make a baby drink?
a: put one in a blender.

Dead baby jokes are NOT cool. Surely people can think of something else to joke about.

What's green and goes 2,000 mph?

A frog in a blender. :D

Prove it goes at 2000mph or I won't laugh.

Dead baby jokes are NOT cool. Surely people can think of something else to joke about.

No, but to the right person they are hilarious, in a shameful, dirty way.

Ok, I laugh at dead baby jokes *Is ashamed*

Dead baby jokes are NOT cool. Surely people can think of something else to joke about.


Yeah, like this joke:

Girl: My cat is so smart he has his own computer.
Boy: Does he use it much?
Girl: Yes. He's always playing with the mouse.

http://smilies.vidahost.com/otn/realhappy/biglaugh.gif

Hee hee!!!!

Dead baby jokes are NOT cool. Surely people can think of something else to joke about.

*shrugs* your opinion.

Prove it goes at 2000mph or I won't laugh.


C'mon, it's just a joke. :rolleyes: :rolleyes:

No, but to the right person they are hilarious, in a shameful, dirty way.

Ok, I laugh at dead baby jokes *Is ashamed*


Sorry, but I find them disrespectful and tasteless. Perhaps its the mommy in me.

Sorry, but I find them disrespectful and tasteless. Perhaps its the mommy in me.

If they were advice i'd agree they were sick, but its just a joke. It's like blonde jokes or Jewish or black jokes- noone means it.

Here's another great joke!:



Knock, knock
Who's there?
C.D
C.D. who?
C.D. badge i'm holding? This is the Police. OPEN UP!:D :D

http://nervousrat.com/realaudio/joefrogblender.htm

in response to a previous post

http://nervousrat.com/realaudio/joefrogblender.htm

in response to a previous post


LOL. A very witty response.

The frog somehow reminds me of Eric Cartman from South Park.

Morris: Hey, I just saved our company five thousand dollars a year!
Doris: How?
Morris: I asked for a raise and the boss said no!

I got one:

Johnny was a chemist's son,
But Johnny is no more.
What Johnny thought was H2O
Was H2SO4

(Sorry, couldn't find subscripts)

my dad's favourite joke:

q: what's the difference between a teddybear?

a: one of it's legs is both the same.

i'm determined to find someone who appreciates this joke as much as me and my dad. i've told it to everyone i know and most people look at me like i might have gone loopy. :P

Two Hydrogen atoms are in a bar, one says to the other: "I think I've lost an electron.","are you sure?","Yes I'm positive" *cringe*

http://b3ta.com/challenge/l33t/