NationStates Jolt Archive


Is Straughn obsessed with God?

Assis
29-05-2006, 12:23
From the HUGE amount of posting evidence gathered here (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=479090) I felt that it would be arguable that Straughn is - at least - one of the options presented in this poll.

I'm curious to see where he's going to cast his vote :D
BackwoodsSquatches
29-05-2006, 12:28
I would say:

Dead on.
Straughn
29-05-2006, 12:34
Would it be poor form to involve myself 'til the poll was closed?
Or at least, should i abstain 'til the poll is at its last input?

Further ... as abstaining goes ... perhaps i should employ "zim-zum"?
Or will the results be tainted by guidance/intervention?
Is there some sort of intercessory process i need to be aware of?
Straughn
29-05-2006, 12:36
If you've done things right, people won't be sure if you've done anything at all ...
-Futurama, Godfellas

http://www.unlc.biz/images/benderpimp.gif
Assis
29-05-2006, 12:36
Would it be poor form to involve myself 'til the poll was closed?
Or at least, should i abstain 'til the poll is at its last input?

Further ... as abstaining goes ... perhaps i should employ "zim-zum"?
Or will the results be tainted by guidance/intervention?
Is there some sort of intercessory process i need to be aware of?
Just shut the fuck up and let other people talk now.... :D
Straughn
29-05-2006, 12:44
Just shut the fuck up and let other people talk now.... :D
Yes, sir. *cringes*
Assis
29-05-2006, 12:50
Yes, sir. *cringes*
Actually... keep talking... you need *bumps* :D
DrunkenDove
29-05-2006, 12:52
Straughn is the FSM. I hope he touches you with his noodly appendage soon.
Assis
29-05-2006, 12:56
Straughn is the FSM. I hope he touches you with his noodly appendage soon.
I still don't know what FSM means... something to do with pirates, according to Straughn? I'm afraid of that "noodly appendage"...
DrunkenDove
29-05-2006, 12:57
I still don't know what FSM means... something to do with pirates, according to Straughn?

May you soon be touched by his noodly appendage. (http://www.venganza.org/) Ramen.
Straughn
29-05-2006, 13:07
I'm not giving anything away here, but if most of these poll options were to be true, i would have *THE COOLEST* believers i could ever possibly hope for.
Unfortunately, that would mean i'd have to adjust the evil aspects of myself just a smidge so everything was in good proportion.
If that were to be the case ... hypothetically .... ;)

BTW, just about *everyone* here loves polls, IME.
Straughn
29-05-2006, 13:08
Straughn is the FSM. I hope he touches you with his noodly appendage soon.
And you know the transubstantiation will be *the best* part. :D
Assis
29-05-2006, 13:13
May you soon be touched by his noodly appendage. (http://www.venganza.org/) Ramen.
ROFL... I will have to read this with more time... :D Did pirates eat noodles :confused:
Straughn
29-05-2006, 13:18
I would say:

Dead on.
As in, i have to die for this to be right? *whimpers*
http://www.websmileys.com/sm/sad/1393.gif

Oh, i know, i'll just fabricate another golem to be the surrogate of me, and you can lightly kill it in whatever fashion is necessary to facilitate your means. Peachy. Hunky-dory.
[NS]Liasia
29-05-2006, 13:18
ROFL... I will have to read this with more time... :D Did pirates eat noodles :confused:

Chinese Pirates did.
DrunkenDove
29-05-2006, 13:19
ROFL... I will have to read this with more time... :D Did pirates eat noodles :confused:

No. It is one of the firm belief of us Pastafarians (as the believers of the FSM is known) that lack of pirates causes global warming.

We even have scientific proof to back our ludricious claims, proving us to be one true religion in the world:

http://www.f5wichita.com/issues/2005-09-01/images/view-letter-FSM1.jpg

As a result, pirates are holy to the FSM. Verily, the official dress for a Pastafarian is a full pirates outfit.
Straughn
29-05-2006, 13:23
No. It is one of the firm belief of us Pastafarians (as the believers of the FSM is known) that lack of pirates causes global warming.

We even have scientific proof to back our ludricious claims, proving us to be one true religion in the world:

http://www.f5wichita.com/issues/2005-09-01/images/view-letter-FSM1.jpg

As a result, pirates are holy to the FSM. Verily, the official dress for a Pastafarian is a full pirates outfit.
I'm wondering if this'll result in an "adjustment" of the poll options .... ;)
Super-power
29-05-2006, 13:24
I believe the real question is: is God obsessed with Straughn?
Peechland
29-05-2006, 13:27
The only thing Straughn is obsessed with is butterscotch.

I on the other hand, am obsessed with thoughts of Straughn.......and butterscotch.Together.Erm. Yeah.
Straughn
29-05-2006, 13:28
I believe the real question is: is God obsessed with Straughn?:eek:
It's like looking at a mirror that faces another mirror, and i got inbetween ... but i'm only seeing the back of my head! *thinks "vaseline jar" joke*
...
Only the "naughty bits", as evidenced by my complete and utter lack of control as to when and where they -whoops, almost gave too much. Best to leave a little to faith. Experience can do the rest.
Straughn
29-05-2006, 13:28
The only thing Straughn is obsessed with is butterscotch.

I on the other hand, am obsessed with thoughts of Straughn.......and butterscotch.Together.Erm. Yeah.Woohoo!

And where've You been, Goddess?
Peechland
29-05-2006, 13:32
Woohoo!

And where've You been, Goddess?


I've been in that realm somewhere between poorly decorated shopping malls and that torturous state of limbo like when youre waiting to get some really important news in the mail and then you find out it's a holiday and you'll have to wait yet another day.

But my SJS radar went off and I had to come a runnin'. ;)
Straughn
29-05-2006, 13:36
I've been in that realm somewhere between poorly decorated shopping malls and that torturous state of limbo like when youre waiting to get some really important news in the mail and then you find out it's a holiday and you'll have to wait yet another day. That sounds pretty familiar. :(


But my SJS radar went off and I had to come a runnin'. ;)And it indeed serves you well. Wait, maybe not. Some might consider me their doom ... like Kyronea, for example (see my sigs? Yaay! I finally was helped by The Beautiful Darkness to making them work - too bad i have too many for the alloted space, :( )
Peechland
29-05-2006, 13:47
That sounds pretty familiar. :(


And it indeed serves you well. Wait, maybe not. Some might consider me their doom ... like Kyronea, for example (see my sigs? Yaay! I finally was helped by The Beautiful Darkness to making them work - too bad i have too many for the alloted space, :( )


sounds like you and I need to find a nice secluded spot and indulge in butterscotch sundaes until we pass out.
Assis
29-05-2006, 14:00
ROFL... I will have to read this with more time... Did pirates eat noodles
Liasia']Chinese Pirates did.
:D
Straughn
29-05-2006, 14:01
sounds like you and I need to find a nice secluded spot and indulge in butterscotch sundaes until we pass out.
Woohoo!
You know, i hear it's awful hot down there .... might need something besides just butterscotch ...
Assis
29-05-2006, 14:03
I'm wondering if this'll result in an "adjustment" of the poll options .... ;)
I haven't found a way to do that.... Is it possible?
Peechland
29-05-2006, 14:06
Woohoo!
You know, i hear it's awful hot down there .... might need something besides just butterscotch ...


Oh I have a nice little Sundae making toolbox right here. It contains everything we need. I'll pick you up at noon, your time. Wear something old that you dont mind getting dirty or torn.


*packs a few last items in the toolbox*
Straughn
29-05-2006, 14:16
Oh I have a nice little Sundae making toolbox right here. It contains everything we need. I'll pick you up at noon, your time. Wear something old that you dont mind getting dirty or torn.


*packs a few last items in the toolbox*
Hahaha!
You know, it's 5.15 am here - i stayed up most of the night arguing on that other thread. Probably not the best idea, but oh well :)
Straughn
29-05-2006, 14:17
I haven't found a way to do that.... Is it possible?
I've ran a few threads but never attempted a poll. I've seen them addressed in the tech/mod forum area, but i don't personally know how to do it.
Also, you may consider a "demon" option. *nods emphatically*
The Beautiful Darkness
29-05-2006, 14:36
(see my sigs? Yaay! I finally was helped by The Beautiful Darkness to making them work - too bad i have too many for the alloted space, :( )

*Preens while inspecting the progeny of my help* :D
Straughn
29-05-2006, 14:49
*Preens while inspecting the progeny of my help* :D
Absolutely, again which i thank you for. *bows*
I have so many sigs i need to start a weekly sigswap (provided the mods don't take umbrage to that).
The Beautiful Darkness
29-05-2006, 14:56
Absolutely, again which i thank you for. *bows*
I have so many sigs i need to start a weekly sigswap (provided the mods don't take umbrage to that).

My pleasure :)

Lol, I'll be sure to keep a look out ;)
Straughn
29-05-2006, 15:11
My pleasure :)

Lol, I'll be sure to keep a look out ;)
Yep, i'll actually do that this week. :)
Usually i say it but it takes me about forever to do certain things ...
Muravyets
29-05-2006, 16:58
I voted "all of the above" because we have already established that Straughn is a god and that he owns and denies it at the same time (the Divine Just Kidding-No Really-No Really Just Kidding-No Wait-Where Was I?), which is the manifest power of Straughn, God of Rippling Reflections. The mythos implies that if the reflections ever stop rippling, the The Iconoclast (me) will destroy the Straughn (by telling him to get out of the tub already).

(I just made most of that up. How does it sound? I think it could work, if squinted at in the right light.)
IL Ruffino
29-05-2006, 17:03
Straughn is God.

:)
Assis
29-05-2006, 17:55
I voted "all of the above" because we have already established that Straughn is a god and that he owns and denies it at the same time (the Divine Just Kidding-No Really-No Really Just Kidding-No Wait-Where Was I?), which is the manifest power of Straughn, God of Rippling Reflections. The mythos implies that if the reflections ever stop rippling, the The Iconoclast (me) will destroy the Straughn (by telling him to get out of the tub already).

(I just made most of that up. How does it sound? I think it could work, if squinted at in the right light.)
Sounds like you casted the right vote... :D
Sarkhaan
29-05-2006, 19:27
The only thing Straughn is obsessed with is butterscotch.

I on the other hand, am obsessed with thoughts of Straughn.......and butterscotch.Together.Erm. Yeah.
you have that problem too? hmm....;)

Straughn is clearly Satan in disguise. I mean, come on, he has three horn nubs!
Crown Prince Satan
29-05-2006, 20:46
:upyours: I HATE YOU F***ING-FUNNY LOVE DOVE.

:sniper:
:sniper:
:eek: Straughn:sniper:
:sniper:
My firing squad


Now that I got that out of my system,
I'm heading off, back to Hell where I belong,
to finish reading the Apocalypse
for the 666,666th time.
Kyronea
29-05-2006, 21:25
You, my doom?! HAH! Don't make me laugh!
Saint Curie
29-05-2006, 21:33
In Straughn's defense, I've mostly just seen him debunking the absolute insistence on any particular dogma of God.

Further in Straughn's defense, I move for dismissal of exhibit D, since it was recovered from his residence during an investigation without probable cause and with no warrant.

Yet further in Straughn's defense, you can't really get fingerprints off a college cheerleader's bra anyway, especially when its covered in butterscotch.
Sarkhaan
29-05-2006, 22:18
In Straughn's defense, I've mostly just seen him debunking the absolute insistence on any particular dogma of God.

Further in Straughn's defense, I move for dismissal of exhibit D, since it was recovered from his residence during an investigation without probable cause and with no warrant.

Yet further in Straughn's defense, you can't really get fingerprints off a college cheerleader's bra anyway, especially when its covered in butterscotch.
iirc, that wasn't what was covered in butterscotch...:eek:
Saint Curie
29-05-2006, 22:53
iirc, that wasn't what was covered in butterscotch...:eek:

Well, six experienced forensic analysts declined to touch the evidence, saying something about "human dignity" or "oh, my ass, you touch that thing, pal".

As such, we can't say at this time what exactly is immersed in the butterscotch.

However, at this time, the "cheerleader's bra" working theory has the most support, except in Europe where a small but vocal group of researchers claim to have evidence that its the prosthetic pinky toe of Straughn's ex-girlfriend from college who died of grief when Straughn announced he would cease diddling comparative religion majors.

But I say, fuck those guys.
Crown Prince Satan
30-05-2006, 01:03
You, my doom?! HAH! Don't make me laugh!
Where you talking to me little thing? WHERE YOU?! :mad:
Straughn
30-05-2006, 10:12
I voted "all of the above" because we have already established that Straughn is a god and that he owns and denies it at the same time (the Divine Just Kidding-No Really-No Really Just Kidding-No Wait-Where Was I?) :eek:
You're right, you did indeed yourself establish that!
which is the manifest power of Straughn, God of Rippling Reflections. The mythos implies that if the reflections ever stop rippling, the The Iconoclast (me) will destroy the Straughn (by telling him to get out of the tub already).The MAS principle of the next plane. :D Tao or yin/yang, it seems to work out pretty well, m'thinks.

(I just made most of that up. How does it sound? I think it could work, if squinted at in the right light.)That is most f*cking excellent. *bows*
Straughn
30-05-2006, 10:13
Straughn is God.

:)
Sorta depends on the time of day and how many smilies there are, huh? ;)
Straughn
30-05-2006, 10:16
Straughn is clearly Satan in disguise. I mean, come on, he has three horn nubs!:eek:
THAT was established too! I'm not sure how good a disguise it is, though ... ;)

So far we have some credible evidence, empirically speaking. So perhaps this and a few other notes on this thread might get used for the thread Assis was using for the original reference.
Straughn
30-05-2006, 10:18
:upyours: I HATE YOU F***ING-FUNNY LOVE DOVE.

:sniper:
:sniper:
:eek: Straughn:sniper:
:sniper:
My firing squad


Now that I got that out of my system,
I'm heading off, back to Hell where I belong,
to finish reading the Apocalypse
for the 666,666th time.
I'm not sure which ones you can use, but here :
http://www.websmileys.com/evil.htm

As you may have suspected, i'm already quite familiar with most of them. :)
Straughn
30-05-2006, 10:19
You, my doom?! HAH! Don't make me laugh!
Me? Or Crown Prince Satan?
:confused:

BTW, sigcheck. ;)
Straughn
30-05-2006, 10:22
In Straughn's defense, I've mostly just seen him debunking the absolute insistence on any particular dogma of God.Far out. I wasn't ever really expecting the role of apologist from you, Saint Curie. :)

Also - here's the fella who crowned *me* Replacement Jesus.
So, essentially, i wouldn't be here today in this particular fashion, as is, without ya. :)

Further in Straughn's defense, I move for dismissal of exhibit D, since it was recovered from his residence during an investigation without probable cause and with no warrant.

Yet further in Straughn's defense, you can't really get fingerprints off a college cheerleader's bra anyway, especially when its covered in butterscotch.Even more so that *most* of said evidence was eaten. What's left, however, would make a superb graven image pendant for the faithful to adorn.
...
Holy sh*t, i just got one of the coolest mental pictures of MY ENTIRE "life".
:) :) :) :) :) :)
Anglachel and Anguirel
30-05-2006, 10:23
Straughn is the FSM. I hope he touches you with his noodly appendage soon.

Why was this not on the poll??? Well, I suppose I still would have answered "all of the above".
Straughn
30-05-2006, 10:27
Well, six experienced forensic analysts declined to touch the evidence, saying something about "human dignity" or "oh, my ass, you touch that thing, pal". Someone muttered at the scene ... Heisenberg :eek:


As such, we can't say at this time what exactly is immersed in the butterscotch.But Corneliu hasn't been ruled out yet - a script from Dogma was found with his fingerprints at the scene.
Kari Byron is also a strong suspect.

However, at this time, the "cheerleader's bra" working theory has the most support, except in Europe where a small but vocal group of researchers claim to have evidence that its the prosthetic pinky toe of Straughn's ex-girlfriend from college who died of grief when Straughn announced he would cease diddling comparative religion majors.

But I say, fuck those guys.
That pretty much wrote itself. Inerrantly. :D
Straughn
30-05-2006, 10:29
Why was this not on the poll??? Well, I suppose I still would have answered "all of the above".
Pascal's Sequel? ;)
IL Ruffino
30-05-2006, 13:15
Sorta depends on the time of day and how many smilies there are, huh? ;)
:p :eek: ;)
Straughn
30-05-2006, 21:49
So far, we're developing a modest "echelon" of witnesses and "apostate-les", for which there is a motion of appreciation for Kari Byron slathered in butterscotch - as well, one of the apostate-les, being Scarlet, also holds a certain appreciation in the godlesspells with anecdote (WooT!)
So hmmm ... what am i missing here?
Sarkhaan
30-05-2006, 22:58
Even more so that *most* of said evidence was eaten. What's left, however, would make a superb graven image pendant for the faithful to adorn.
...
Holy sh*t, i just got one of the coolest mental pictures of MY ENTIRE "life".
:) :) :) :) :) :)
...:eek:

I WANT ONE!
Straughn
31-05-2006, 04:32
...:eek:

I WANT ONE!Verily, i say you certainly deserve it! :)

Strangely enough, throngs of worshippers or "appreciators" doing so would be QUITE appreciated by me!!!
Is there enough butterscotch?

Isn't that an awesome image? WooT!!
Crown Prince Satan
31-05-2006, 04:41
I'm not sure which ones you can use, but here :
http://www.websmileys.com/evil.htm

As you may have suspected, i'm already quite familiar with most of them. :)
http://www.websmileys.com/sm/evil/teu38.gif Coooool.
Straughn
31-05-2006, 10:18
http://www.websmileys.com/sm/evil/teu38.gif Coooool.
Yeppers.
It's done wonders for already vacuous arguments on my part - it helps to make them more humiliatingly colourful!
;)
Cobbleism
21-06-2006, 19:58
If by god one means the delusion as created by other and accepted by society then, yes. If by Satan you mean adversary to the church or evil, then yes. If by faith you mean an unknowing victim to his own particular brand of criticism and offense, then most definately. So yes works for all but the first. He has no problem with spirituality, he just hates, scratch that, loathes religion based on a contradictory and wholly uncertifiable document that one must be "shown how to read." From his posts one can ascertain that he throughly researches what he talks about (the cheesegrater and wasabi I don't know about, I am speaking of his more serious posts); therefore, the concept of a religion based on a document that can't be verified appears as completely ludicris and unworthy of a belief system attributed to it. He also loathes the political aspect of organizations directly in charge of religious matters. Their greed and corruption, being contrary to what they preach, infuses him with a rage unsurpassed by any deity ever spoken of. He is really just a guy, with a little (depending on the scale) touch of evil, and certain expectations and guidelines for which he judges the world and the entities in it. I tend to agree with a lot of his ideas, mainly because of the whole "Logic is my guiding force" mentality that I have. On a side note, if Straughn were god/satan, I do believe I would pledge my soul to him. Based on the notion that at least any punishment/reward I recieved would be inventive and original, liable to change at the whim of an wrathful, yet butterscoth-loving, and forgetful deity. Which except for the latter two, I do believe describes the god of the holy bible, at least when he is around (i.e. Old Testament).
Hydesland
21-06-2006, 20:01
If by god one means the delusion as created by other and accepted by society then, yes. If by Satan you mean adversary to the church or evil, then yes. If by faith you mean an unknowing victim to his own particular brand of criticism and offense, then most definately. So yes works for all but the first. He has no problem with spirituality, he just hates, scratch that, loathes religion based on a contradictory and wholly uncertifiable document that one must be "shown how to read." From his posts one can ascertain that he throughly researches what he talks about (the cheesegrater and wasabi I don't know about, I am speaking of his more serious posts); therefore, the concept of a religion based on a document that can't be verified appears as completely ludicris and unworthy of a belief system attributed to it. He also loathes the political aspect of organizations directly in charge of religious matters. Their greed and corruption, being contrary to what they preach, infuses him with a rage unsurpassed by any deity ever spoken of. He is really just a guy, with a little (depending on the scale) touch of evil, and certain expectations and guidelines for which he judges the world and the entities in it. I tend to agree with a lot of his ideas, mainly because of the whole "Logic is my guiding force" mentality that I have. On a side note, if Straughn were god/satan, I do believe I would pledge my soul to him. Based on the notion that at least any punishment/reward I recieved would be inventive and original, liable to change at the whim of an wrathful, yet butterscoth-loving, and forgetful deity. Which except for the latter two, I do believe describes the god of the holy bible, at least when he is around (i.e. Old Testament).

Grave dig alert.
Straughn
22-06-2006, 08:16
If by god one means the delusion as created by other and accepted by society then, yes. If by Satan you mean adversary to the church or evil, then yes. If by faith you mean an unknowing victim to his own particular brand of criticism and offense, then most definately.Unknowing? *ponders*
So yes works for all but the first. He has no problem with spirituality, he just hates, scratch that, loathes religion based on a contradictory and wholly uncertifiable document that one must be "shown how to read." From his posts one can ascertain that he throughly researches what he talks about (the cheesegrater and wasabi I don't know about, I am speaking of his more serious posts); therefore, the concept of a religion based on a document that can't be verified appears as completely ludicris and unworthy of a belief system attributed to it. He also loathes the political aspect of organizations directly in charge of religious matters. Their greed and corruption, being contrary to what they preach, infuses him with a rage unsurpassed by any deity ever spoken of. He is really just a guy, with a little (depending on the scale) touch of evil, and certain expectations and guidelines for which he judges the world and the entities in it. I tend to agree with a lot of his ideas, mainly because of the whole "Logic is my guiding force" mentality that I have.Excelsior. *bows*
On a side note, if Straughn were god/satan, I do believe I would pledge my soul to him.Erm ... souls are hard enough to develop as it is. You might want to hold on to that fragile creature a bit longer ... ;)
Besides, i'm not done crafting mine yet. Ask Muravyets and Verdigroth about that.
Based on the notion that at least any punishment/reward I recieved would be inventive and original, liable to change at the whim of an wrathful, yet butterscoth-loving, and forgetful deity. Which except for the latter two, I do believe describes the god of the holy bible, at least when he is around (i.e. Old Testament).Well, there's a bit more wrath in that book than in mine. I have a larger random quotient/quota for my passage.
That, and i'm not so keen on slaying everyone and spreading feces on their faces. Well, not out of wrath, anyway. :)

http://www.websmileys.com/sm/mad/boese045.gif
Straughn
22-06-2006, 08:17
Grave dig alert.
What did you expect?
I have posted before, after all, that I *am* a golem here.