NationStates Jolt Archive

My town is, once again, under water. First, we had over a week of constant rain, and now, again, we have heavy rain for the rest of the day. Many streets are flooded, both here, and over the general New England/Northeast area of the US. This has prompted me to create...

The Northeast Survival Kit!

This lovely kayak (http://planetegraff.free.fr/images/kayak.jpg) is perfect for all your basic transportation needs, from getting around town to cruising around. Gives a great workout!

Once you have docked your kayak, jump into our comfortable and stylish waders (http://www.patrickmarsh.org/images/waders.jpg). Ideal for walking into any local shops, or wading down the flooded hallways. From walking on the now submerged beachs, to hiking around Boston for a party or fancy night out, these are a must-have for any New Englander.

Looking for more of a workout? Slip on your favorite bathing suit and our beautiful goggle and snorkel set (http://images.veer.com/IMG/PILL/IMI/IMI0121022_P.JPG). From 5th Ave in NYC to Newbury Street in Boston, swim along and observe the aquatic rats (or are they medium sized dogs?) as they swim along side you.

For our adventure seekers, this is for you. Just latch your inflatable killer whale (http://www.infoniagara.com/hotels_and_motels/images/Niagara-Falls/econowest/kdspl.jpg), alligator (http://www.poolcenter.com/images/POOLTOYS_bi_ali84_alligator.jpg), or dolphin (http://www.digster.com/ProductImages/furniture/kidpoolacc-dolphin_rideon.GIF) onto a passing car or boat, and hold on for a ride! Or, for those who are more adventurous, latch onto your local subway system for a wild underground ride! Just mind the 3rd rail.

Or, for those who are like me, (cheap, poor, or both), we present you with this lovely umbrella (http://www.creationsbykim.com/Images/duckumbrellam.gif)! Sure, with our high winds, it will look like this within (http://images.veer.com/IMG/PIMG/CYP/CYP0200076_P.JPG) 5 minutes, but hey, atleast you'll have a good story, right? RIGHT?!


oh, and just so there is no confusion, when this (http://pinker.wjh.harvard.edu/photos/cape_cod_II/images/sun%20setting%20over%20Pilgrim%20Monument.jpg) appears, have no fear! It is only the sun. It cannot harm you directly, nor does it require your worship nor human sacrifices. I know it is pretty, and that it has been a while since we've seen it, but remember, looking directly at it is dangerous.


Keep an eye out for our New Orleans kit, coming this hurricane season!


If it keeps on rainin', levee's goin' to break,
When The Levee Breaks I'll have no place to stay.






...no, I'm not bored.

Damn, I was hoping this was a survival kit for us Southerners to go up North and deal with them Yankees. Through my three terms at Bennington, I was able to learn the Yankee ways, but for my fellow Southerners who have not strayed far over the Mason-Dixon Line, I think a survival kit should be included. "People will not randomly say hello to you," it would say. "Do not wave at people you do not know, or they will think you're simple."

And I thought it was about dealing with Geordies. Never mind.

It's been raining for about a fortnight here in the South of England as well, and it looks like it's going to keep raining for another week yet. And this when we keep being told we're in the middle of the biggest drought in a century. :rolleyes:

I can swim, so stick yer kayak up yer soft-as-shite-southern-leaking-reservoir, ye big Jessie!

:fluffle:

Rain? Pah, you've never seen rain! There is more need for something to deal with the southerners!





Apart from Geordies, everyone hates Geordies, even themselves.

I thought this was something to do with taking Newkie Ale with you, but no... ah well *sighs*.

I thought this was something to do with taking Newkie Ale with you, but no... ah well *sighs*.


This Ale was once drunk by King Arthur, you know.
He'll come again!

rain bah, none of yer have seen rain till you come to manchester.
fve feet 'ih it wer

If it's survival you want, then you need to get yourself one of these:
A survival ball:
http://www.halliburtoncontracts.com/about/thumbnails/SurvivaBall-crosssection.jpg
A bigger picture can be found here:
Survival Ball (http://www.halliburtoncontracts.com/about/images/SurvivaBall-crosssection.jpg)
further info here:
survival ball info (http://www.halliburtoncontracts.com/about/images/SurvivaBallSafetyCard.jpg)

Rain? Pah, you've never seen rain! There is more need for something to deal with the southerners!





Apart from Geordies, everyone hates Geordies, even themselves.
Do we now?

High and dry in my part of Maine. Hell, we're still below normal for rainfall.

High and dry in my part of Maine. Hell, we're still below normal for rainfall.


Same here. I live in Bangor, in the southern part of Penobscot County, where there has not been even a flood watch. Ahh, I love Maine, so MOVE TO MAINE! 90% Forest enough convincing?

You're in Bangor? I'm at UMaine! We're neighbors!

rain..... yeah i saw rain once.... thats that thing where water falls from the sky right?

who invented that? its kinda stupid, so messy, the stuff gets everywhere.

rain..... yeah i saw rain once.... thats that thing where water falls from the sky right?

who invented that? its kinda stupid, so messy, the stuff gets everywhere.


Well, LEGALLY, if it causes you damage ( as lots of water does ), it is called an Act of God. ;)

If it's survival you want, then you need to get yourself one of these:
A survival ball:
http://www.halliburtoncontracts.com/about/thumbnails/SurvivaBall-crosssection.jpg
A bigger picture can be found here:
Survival Ball (http://www.halliburtoncontracts.com/about/images/SurvivaBall-crosssection.jpg)
further info here:
survival ball info (http://www.halliburtoncontracts.com/about/images/SurvivaBallSafetyCard.jpg)


GAH! IT'S GOT EVERYTHIN' EXCEPT THE KITCHEN SINK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!:eek:

You're in Bangor? I'm at UMaine! We're neighbors!


Neighbors? REALLY?!?!

Well, LEGALLY, if it causes you damage ( as lots of water does ), it is called an Act of God. ;)
its more of an annoyance really. a couple times a year i get wet leaving walmart and rushing to my car. its very yucky.

maybe i can sue this god guy for harrassment?

If it's survival you want, then you need to get yourself one of these:
A survival ball:
http://www.halliburtoncontracts.com/about/thumbnails/SurvivaBall-crosssection.jpg
Dude! That actually looks cool. Can I get one from a company other than Halliburton? :cool:

I live on a mountain :p

*pats 4wheel drive*

Neighbors? REALLY?!?!


Until now, I thought I was the only person in the state of Maine on NS.

Damn, I was hoping this was a survival kit for us Southerners to go up North and deal with them Yankees. Through my three terms at Bennington, I was able to learn the Yankee ways, but for my fellow Southerners who have not strayed far over the Mason-Dixon Line, I think a survival kit should be included. "People will not randomly say hello to you," it would say. "Do not wave at people you do not know, or they will think you're simple."
waving...I can deal with. Randomly saying hello? creeps me out. If I don't know you, I have no interest in talking to you.

Another good one to remember is that if you hold the door open for someone, don't expect a thank you. It is implied.

waving...I can deal with. Randomly saying hello? creeps me out. If I don't know you, I have no interest in talking to you.

Another good one to remember is that if you hold the door open for someone, don't expect a thank you. It is implied.
People say hello to me in school, so I walk faster.

What really.. bugs.. me is.. we have a cabin in this place called Loyalsock, beautiful place, but when you go fishing.. the people start having conversations with you. Not quick ones either.. This guy and his son came over to me once and didn't stop talking.. to me.

I'm quite the antisocial type. I wanted to cry :(

Damn, I was hoping this was a survival kit for us Southerners to go up North and deal with them Yankees. Through my three terms at Bennington, I was able to learn the Yankee ways, but for my fellow Southerners who have not strayed far over the Mason-Dixon Line, I think a survival kit should be included. "People will not randomly say hello to you," it would say. "Do not wave at people you do not know, or they will think you're simple."


Don't pretend that Southerners are friendly; they're not. I lived in the South for 20 years. I consider it exile in the CSA. Southerners are actually very xenophobic and unfriendly. Some of the meanest, nastiest, most narrow minded, not to mention most gossipy people I've ever met live in Dixie. They only put on the "aw, shucks" "down home" stuff for the cameras.

People say hello to me in school, so I walk faster.

What really.. bugs.. me is.. we have a cabin in this place called Loyalsock, beautiful place, but when you go fishing.. the people start having conversations with you. Not quick ones either.. This guy and his son came over to me once and didn't stop talking.. to me.

I'm quite the antisocial type. I wanted to cry :(
ha...I was at the gym up at school, and they were running tours of the place. I was on the leg press, lifting around 200 lbs, with my ipod on, and some kids father comes up to me and asks me how I like BU in a nice jawja accent.

Honestly, I'm not the worlds most approachable person normally. I have piercings, a goatee, and a stern face. Add to that the fact that I had on headphones and WAS LIFTING 200 LBS WITH MY LEGS, and you really just have to wonder "why me?". The sad thing is, even after I ignored him, he persisted. I felt bad for his son...the kid looked so embarrased.

Until now, I thought I was the only person in the state of Maine on NS.


Well............


"If you're not from Maine, you're not a human!"



...................and we will spread the word with the new slogan!

To survive in the Northeast you need sunblock, fresh coconut water, cachaça and a laid back attitude.

The Northeast is like this:

http://www.jericoacoara.com/images/inical/fotcen.jpg

Oh, you mean the Northeast of the USA, not of Brazil.

To survive in the Northeast you need sunblock, fresh coconut water, cachaça and a laid back attitude.

The Northeast is like this:

http://www.jericoacoara.com/images/inical/fotcen.jpg

Oh, you mean the Northeast of the USA, not of Brazil.


I wanna live the, ther, th, t*Trails off*

WARNING!!! THE REMOTE ISLANDS ERROR!!!!!! PLEASE EVACUATE THE AREA!!!!!! I REPEAT, EVACUATE THE AREA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



We will try to maintain a safe enviroment(Which, sadly, in this case, involves firearms).

:sniper: :sniper: :sniper: :sniper: :sniper: :mp5: :mp5: :gundge: :gundge: