NationStates Jolt Archive

has anyone else heard of this? that the dead sea scrolls may have been read incorectly and jesus walked on ice, not water? seems like much less of a miracle to me.

has anyone else heard of this? that the dead sea scrolls may have been read incorectly and jesus walked on ice, not water? seems like much less of a miracle to me.
The dead sea scrolls contained old testament stories. No jesus.

The misinterpretation was supposed to be that it said he walked by the water, not on the water. And the Dead Sea scrolls were before Jesus.

You maybe got the story indirectly from here, Spoof.com.

http://www.thespoof.com/news/spoof.cfm?headline=s3i9818

I've often suspected that historians are interpreting ancient writings incorrectly. For example, in the Valley Of Fire, north of Las Vegas, there are several Natiev American hieroglyphs. The interpretations given are that they are actually prayers for hunting success or for rain or what have you, but I have often thought that they probably said things more like, "Running Deer eats bear shit" or "Opening Flower has a sweet p*ss*."

I've often suspected that historians are interpreting ancient writings incorrectly. For example, in the Valley Of Fire, north of Las Vegas, there are several Natiev American hieroglyphs. The interpretations given are that they are actually prayers for hunting success or for rain or what have you, but I have often thought that they probably said things more like, "Running Deer eats bear shit" or "Opening Flower has a sweet p*ss*."
How do you know they weren't advertizements for ancient Indian casinos?

The dead sea scrolls contained old testament stories. No jesus.
You forget that in the Old Testament, Jesus went by the name of Strider.

You forget that in the Old Testament, Jesus went by the name of Strider.
:confused:

has anyone else heard of this? that the dead sea scrolls may have been read incorectly and jesus walked on ice, not water? seems like much less of a miracle to me.
What the hell are you talking about?
The Dead Sea scrolls say nothing of Jesus, in fact they were written before he was even born. If you’re talking about misinterpretation of the actual New Testament text than why did the guy who got out get scared of the WAVES and started SINKING. Is this a flame thread or are you really that thick/uneducated?

:confused:
http://www.brickshelf.com/gallery/Obi-Juan-Kenobi/Lotr/strider.jpg

You forget that in the Old Testament, Jesus went by the name of Strider.
...how do you figure he went by anything before we was born? The Old Testament is set a hundred years before Jesus, he was spoken of as a future person who will be the Christ, but he is not called by a name in the Old Testament.

...how do you figure he went by anything before we was born? The Old Testament is set a hundred years before Jesus, he was spoken of as a future person who will be the Christ, but he is not called by a name in the Old Testament.
No, he's talking about how God begat the elephant god Burash and that Strider, who later transcended through the Holy Gate and became jesus after battling the Silver Minotaur. Think about it. If that's not true, then how can there be trees?

http://www.brickshelf.com/gallery/Obi-Juan-Kenobi/Lotr/strider.jpg

i was thinking this....

http://emulation.france.free.fr/scans/Soreal/pub/Strider.jpg

huh? what would they have been doing out on the ice in a boat? did the 1st century israelis have ice boats? wouldnt it have to have been an extraordinarily cold winter to freeze the sea of galilee hard enough to support the weight of 2 men standing together?

No, he's talking about how God begat the elephant god Burash and that Strider, who later transcended through the Holy Gate and became jesus after battling the Silver Minotaur. Think about it. If that's not true, then how can there be trees?
I can't argue with that.

I can't argue with that.
At least one person around here uses their capacity for logic.

No, he's talking about how God begat the elephant god Burash and that Strider, who later transcended through the Holy Gate and became jesus after battling the Silver Minotaur. Think about it. If that's not true, then how can there be trees?
...well that is irefutable, I'll hafta start going to whatever church you do, because there must be alot of PCP there.

No, he's talking about how God begat the elephant god Burash and that Strider, who later transcended through the Holy Gate and became jesus after battling the Silver Minotaur. Think about it. If that's not true, then how can there be trees?
He was a ranger.

He was a ranger.
I knew Jesus had it in his heart to help Hobbits.

...well that is irefutable, I'll hafta start going to whatever church you do, because there must be alot of PCP there.
Nah. Just a lot of the blood of Christ. At my church we just don't take one of those silly little shot glasses filled with his blood, we suck that shit down in a 40oz Buzz Bomb!

Screw the wine and wafers! We're gonna have Jack Daniels and Beer Nutz! :p

I knew Jesus had it in his heart to help Hobbits.
He's so dreamy, isn't he?

Nah. Just a lot of the blood of Christ. At my church we just don't take one of those silly little shot glasses filled with his blood, we suck that shit down in a 40oz Buzz Bomb!

Screw the wine and wafers! We're gonna have Jack Daniels and Beer Nutz! :p
:p

i was thinking this....

http://emulation.france.free.fr/scans/Soreal/pub/Strider.jpg

I, on the other hand, immediately pictured this:

http://www.lordoftherings.net/film/cast/ca_vmort.html

I knew Jesus had it in his heart to help Hobbits.


everytime you head "froooooooooooodooooooooooooooo" in LOTR. it was jesus

He's so dreamy, isn't he?
he's on the cover of MY totally fabulous.

I, on the other hand, immediately pictured this:

http://www.lordoftherings.net/film/cast/ca_vmort.html
Is that a real picture?


JESUS IS BACK!

He was a ranger.
Yes. Later, he was Aragorn. Hmm... maybe it was Jesus who said, Olorin I was called in the West that is forgotten.:confused: Was it gandalf or Jesus or the Fenris Wolf that beat the Giants at Azguard and ascended atop Olympus with Budha? If I remember correectly it was Jesus who beat the Giants with a pop fly to center field. Fenris was on third and made it home on Jesus' sacrifice fly. I could be wrong, though.

I, on the other hand, immediately pictured this:

http://www.lordoftherings.net/film/cast/ca_vmort.html


i think im way too into video games

Yes. Later, he was Aragorn. Hmm... maybe it was Jesus who said, Olorin I was called in the West that is forgotten.:confused: Was it gandalf or Jesus or the Fenris Wolf that beat the Giants at Azguard and ascended atop Olympus with Budha? If I remember correectly it was Jesus who beat the Giants with a pop fly to center field. Fenris was on third and made it home on Jesus' sacrifice fly. I could be wrong, though.
God I feel nerdy:rolleyes:

God I feel nerdy:rolleyes:
Why? You're a Giants fan? They do suck.

Why? You're a Giants fan? They do suck.
No. Bonds can rot, I'm a Astros fan, now all they need to do is be better at baseball and they'll be set.

has anyone else heard of this? that the dead sea scrolls may have been read incorectly and jesus walked on ice, not water? seems like much less of a miracle to me.

Now that's one I haven't heard. I would think it would be rather odd to have fisherman out on the ice in Galilee, though. Could be wrong, but it seems odd.

Of course, there have been mistranslations of miracles in the Bible. For instance, newer translations of the Moses story say that he led them through th Sea of Reeds, not the Red Sea. In other words, he led them through a swamp - one that pharaoh and his chariots couldn't get through. Makes a lot more sense in the long run, since going acrosss the Red Sea to get to Mt. Sinai would be rather silly - taking you all over the map. Does it sound as exciting? No, not really. Does that mean that God didn't lead them through, helping them find a proper path? No.

No. Bonds can rot, I'm a Astros fan, now all they need to do is be better at baseball and they'll be set.
Do the Astros accept Aragorn as the rightful heir to the throne?

Slow News Day in Europe

Reuters claims Jesus walked on ice not water SHOCKAH!!! sez BBC

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/middle_east/4881108.stm

Do the Astros accept Aragorn as the rightful heir to the throne?

How the fuck do you go from christ to the astros??!:headbang:

Considering its possible that the people who wrote about Jesus did so many years after his death, I dont care.

Didn't they find out about a year ago from some new scrolls from Oxyrhynchus or someplace that the number of the beast was actually 616 not 666?

How the fuck do you go from christ to the astros??!:headbang:
hey once the original post is disposed of, the thread can go anywhere it likes. if you bother to read them, your question was answered. after that its all very amusing.

maybe we should write a bible/lordoftherings crossover fanfiction..

How the fuck do you go from christ to the astros??!:headbang:
And with the enlightment comes the knowledge that all is as if one.

I knew Jesus had it in his heart to help Hobbits.


Bad news.

Turns out Jesus only helps Hobbits who help themselves.

So, once Frodo got to the mountain, and dropped the ring in, and saved the day, THEN Jesus would lend a hand.

hey once the original post is disposed of, the thread can go anywhere it likes. if you bother to read them, your question was answered. after that its all very amusing.

maybe we should write a bible/lordoftherings crossover fanfiction..
That would be so bitchen. A bible Jesus/gandolf thing repleat with sports references. It would read like the bible/silmarillion and Sports Illustrated all in one. That would be really keen, dadio.

What the hell are you talking about?
The Dead Sea scrolls say nothing of Jesus, in fact they were written before he was even born. If you’re talking about misinterpretation of the actual New Testament text than why did the guy who got out get scared of the WAVES and started SINKING. Is this a flame thread or are you really that thick/uneducated?
...how do you figure he went by anything before we was born? The Old Testament is set a hundred years before Jesus, he was spoken of as a future person who will be the Christ, but he is not called by a name in the Old Testament.
Class, this is what is known as irony.