NationStates Jolt Archive

If you took my home and food away, then of course I would eat or kill you. Discuss.

I do not understand, really I don't, how one can live on a canal in Florida and leave ones' kids or pets outside unsupervised.

Gators are very efficient at what they do, which is drown, rip apart, and eat prey.

Note to self: Don't fuck with Sel Appa

Now surprise since the increase in development there have been many more animal attacks that wouldn't happen if we didn't pollute and take habitats away.

EX: Sharks, alliagtors

No surprise since the increase in development there have been many more animal attacks that wouldn't happen if we didn't pollute and take habitats away.

EX: Sharks, alliagtors

No surprise since the increase in development there have been many more animal attacks that wouldn't happen if we didn't pollute and take habitats away.

EX: Sharks, alliagtors

Those people knew alligators were in there, so comon, why would you go swimming in there, or even put your feet in? I think we're seeing Natural Selection take place here.

Sort of like the little kid that goes to pet the big striped, furry kitty cat, and then ends up becoming its lunch...err friend. Retarded damn kid. Oh well, at least the kitty gets fed. :)

If you took my home and food away, then of course I would eat or kill you. Discuss.

Tough job being at the bottom of the foodchain :D

Alligator<Deer Hunter

No surprise . . .
Well of course its no surprise now, you've already told me twice before.

No surprise since the increase in development there have been many more animal attacks that wouldn't happen if we didn't pollute and take habitats away.

EX: Sharks, alliagtors

I heard about those massive apartment complexes that are going up in the ocean. Yep. And the shopping centers, urban sprawl, etc. All in the ocean.

Sort of like the little kid that goes to pet the big striped, furry kitty cat, and then ends up becoming its lunch...err friend. Retarded damn kid. Oh well, at least the kitty gets fed. :)

exactly!

A new study has just come out relating to this topic.
http://www.theonion.com/content/node/48203

A new study has just come out relating to this topic.
http://www.theonion.com/content/node/48203

LOL! 10!

LOL! 10!
I enjoy seeing some people being snapped in half by these animals, particularly when they taunt them. Like that massive white tiger which nearly devoured its idiot "handler". The revolution is nigh.

I enjoy seeing some people being snapped in half by these animals, particularly when they taunt them. Like that massive white tiger which nearly devoured its idiot "handler". The revolution is nigh.

Did you see the one where the circus elephant just had enough and decide to go on a rampage in a circus??

Bear ally withers!

Did you see the one where the circus elephant just had enough and decide to go on a rampage in a circus??
Haha no I believe I missed that one. I don't like elephants much, but it serves those circus freaks right for the way they parade the animals like exhibits.

HA! I love alligators . . .

I think we should actually thank the alligators, they are weeding out our genetic gene pool.

I think we should actually thank the alligators, they are weeding out our genetic gene pool.
Too true. ;)

I love the coverage of this business though, especially the woman who said:
"This ain't no fucking playground, bitch, this is Florida, and in Florida you gotta watch your fucking back or you gonna die."
Ok, so that wasn't what was said at all, but that was the sentiment, and my paraphrasing skills are a bit off this week.

I do not understand, really I don't, how one can live on a canal in Florida and leave ones' kids or pets outside unsupervised.
Leaving them unsupervised is bad enough - but some of these cases are stupidity on an unbelievable scale. The first woman attacked the other week was dangling her legs in the water - I don't know about the two later on, but earlier cases have involved people actually swimming in the canals.

I suppose it's the same base stupidity that leads people to go swimming too far out where there are sharks in Australia. People just think they're immortal and that the rules don't apply to them.

I do not understand, really I don't, how one can live on a canal in Florida and leave ones' kids or pets outside unsupervised.

Gators are very efficient at what they do, which is drown, rip apart, and eat prey.
you forgot get close enough to attack.

http://bau2.uibk.ac.at/sg/python/Scripts/ContractualObligations/TheMenBeingEatenbyaCrocodile

Newscaster: And right now it's time for athletics, and over to Brian Goebells in Paris.
Goebells: Hello, well you join us here in Paris just a few minutes before the start of today's big event: the final of the Men's-Being-Eaten-By-A-Crocodile event. I'm standing now by the crocodile pit where-AAAAHHHHH!

(FX: Crocodiles eating, French exclamations and sirens)

Newscaster: Ah. Well I'm afraid that we've lost Brian. While they're sorting that out, we have a report from Barry Loothesom in Lughtborrow on the British preparations for this most important event.
Loothesom: Here at Lughtborrow are the five young men chosen last week to be eaten by a crocodile for Britain this summer. Obviously, the most important part of the event is the opening 60 yard sprint towards the crocs. And twenty-two year old Nottingham schoolteacher Gavin Watterlow is rated by some not only the fastest but also the tastiest British morsel since Barry Gordon got a bronze at Helsinki. In charge of the team is Sergeant Major Harold Duke.
Duke: Aww, well, you not only got to get in that pit first, you gotta get EATEN first. When you land in front of your croc, and 'e opens his mouth, I wanna see you right in there. Rub your 'ead up against 'is taste buds. And when those teeth bite into your flesh, use the perches to thrust yourself DOWN his throat...
Loothesom: Duke's trained with every British team since 1928, and it's his blend of gymnastic knowhow, reptilian expertise and culinary skill that's turned many an un-appetizing novice into a crocodilic banquet.
Duke: Well, our chefs have been experimenting for many years to find a sauce most likely to tempt the crocodile. In the past, we've concentrated on a fish based sauce, but this year, we are reverting to a simple bernaise.
Loothesom: The British team are worried because Olympic regulations allow only the competitor's heads to be sauced. Gavin Morolowe...
Morolowe: Yes, well, I mean, (clears throat) you know, four years ago, everyone knew the Italians were coating the insides of their legs with bolinaise, the Russians have been marinating themselves, One of the Germans, Biolek, was caught actually putting, uh, remolarde down his shorts. And the Finns were using tomato flavoured running shoes. Uh, I think there should either be unrestricted garnishing, or a single, Olympic standard mayonnaise.
Loothesom: Gavin, does it ever worry you that you're actually going to be chewed up by a bloody, grey crocodile.
Morolowe: The only thing that worries me, Jim, is being the first one down that gully.
Loothesom: Well, the way things are going here at Lughtborrow, it looks as though Britan could easily pick up a place in the first seven hundred. But nothing's predictable in this tough, harsh, highly competitive world where today's champion is tomorrow's crocodile shit. And back to you, in the studio, Norman.

Those people knew alligators were in there, so comon, why would you go swimming in there, or even put your feet in? I think we're seeing Natural Selection take place here.
I agree. Unless it's a sinister state sponsored Alligator-feeding programme

I blame the obesity epidemic. We're now tasty fatty snacks, and we can't run anymore!

Can't outrun a gator anyway, unless you have a decent head start.

Who cares if they are a surprise?
The main thing to do is to wipe out the alligators.