NationStates Jolt Archive

EDIT: Feel free to keep the thread alive with your computer problems.


Let me start by stating my first major sin: I did not back, at any point in time, back up my computer onto disk. Cast your stones if you must but you cannot do more harm to me than I have done to my forehead as it pounds my desk.

I got some virus from an email. Norton can't detect it except to give me a great big red shiny x next to where it says email detection warning somethingorother. I can only run my computer in Safe Mode. I can get to where I put in my name and password in normal mode but the computer restarts after about five minutes of trying to get to the windows screen. I tried to restore my computer to an earlier time but that didn't work because no programs were installed at the time (that was the general message I got from it). I ran spybot but nothing came up. I ran Ad-Aware but nothing worked. Is my computer shot? Would restoring it at a point when I downloaded a program help? Is there something I can do? Anything? Is there someplace else I can go in safe mode to figure out what exactly the problem is?

I am computer illiterate and at your mercy.

try hijackthis. That got rid of my cool websearch virus, might help you.

Sacrifice your hard drive to C'thulu and then buy a new computer.

try hijackthis. That got rid of my cool websearch virus, might help you.
Thank you.

Sacrifice your hard drive to C'thulu and then buy a new computer.
*holds my tongue*

*holds my tongue*

*holds his/her tongue*, surely?

*holds my tongue*
[I] holds my tongue . . .?
Your grammar has no doubt mystified your computer, such that it is no longer capable of operating for more than five minutes straight without fainting. Your only recourse is to sacrifice a dozen grammar handbooks, two dozen dictionaries, and a virgin to the Gods of English that they may cure your computer and forever purify your sinful tongue.

Norton
There's your problem, right there. Use something like AVG (AntiVir Guard) or Avast. (I'm partial to Avast, because it's so piratey and the quarantine section is called the Virus Chest. :D ) Norton has screwed up the computers of SO many people, including myself. It GAVE my computer a virus, when I installed it from a disc that -came with the package we got when we signed up for high speed internet-. It also completely fragged my aunt's computer, which still has no driver for the sound card and still screws up when they try to hook it up to their TV, after a few months. Never use Norton, or McAfee, or any other 'pay-to-use' software, for viruses. Ever.

Both AVG and Avast! are available on Download.com for your downloading pleasure.

*holds his/her tongue*, surely?
No i think it is... *Rips out his tongue and uses it as a paperweight.*

[I] holds my tongue . . .?
Your grammar has no doubt mystified your computer, such that it is no longer capable of operating for more than five minutes straight without fainting. Your only recourse is to sacrifice a dozen grammar handbooks, two dozen dictionaries, and a virgin to the Gods of English that they may cure your computer and forever purify your sinful tongue.
hold one's tongue(v) :(used imperatively)to stop talking; stay quiet or silent.

hold one's tongue(v) :(used imperatively)to stop talking; stay quiet or silent.
Yeah, but "[I] holds?" Maybe my harping on this is a sign that I has too much time on my hands, but I doesn't think that your grammar is all that good.

Yeah, but "[I] holds?" Maybe my harping on this is a sign that I has too much time on my hands, but I doesn't think that your grammar is all that good.

How dare you claim that description? I was the first to draw attention to the poster's poor grammar.

Yeah, but "[I] holds?" Maybe my harping on this is a sign that I has too much time on my hands, but I doesn't think that your grammar is all that good.
Yes, you have too much time on your hands. If I was writing a complete sentence it would not have been correct grammar. It was between an asterisks which meant it was an action presently happening and did not require a complete sentence to get a message across. I should have said, (without asterisks), "I hold my tongue." but it wasn't necessary for what I intended to be a quick note as to what I was doing.

THIS ISN'T HELPING!

Though, it's amusing to defend.

Yes, you have too much time on your hands. If I was writing a complete sentence it would not have been correct grammar. It was between an asterisks which meant it was an action presently happening and did not require a complete sentence to get a message across. I should have said, (without asterisks), "I hold my tongue." but it wasn't necessary for what I intended to be a quick note as to what I was doing.

THIS ISN'T HELPING!

Though, it's amusing to defend.

No, between the asterisks should have been "holds his tongue", "holds his tongue", I say!

Yes, you have too much time on your hands. If I was writing a complete sentence it would not have been correct grammar. It was between an asterisks which meant it was an action presently happening and did not require a complete sentence to get a message across. I should have said, (without asterisks), "I hold my tongue." but it wasn't necessary for what I intended to be a quick note as to what I was doing.

THIS ISN'T HELPING!

Though, it's amusing to defend.
Oh, but it is!

No, between the asterisks should have been "holds his tongue", "holds his tongue", I say!
I don't want to hold anyone elses tongue!!

You're gross.

I don't want to hold anyone elses tongue!!

You're gross.

"Holds" is the third person. "My" is the first person.
These two do not work together in such a context!

Oh, but it is!
If I go home and my computer is fixed because of this discussion, I'll know just how magical General is.

"Holds" is the third person. "My" is the first person.
These two do not work together in such a context!
Oh, fuck.



How does it feel to win, huh? You feel good, now? Feel like a winner?

Oh, fuck.



How does it feel to win, huh? You feel good, now? Feel like a winner?

:D S'ok.

Alright. Let's do this. :D

We can make you, and your computer have a wonderful computing experience henceforth and forever. You need a few simple programs to accomplish this.

AVG AntiVirus Free Edition (http://free.grisoft.com/)
- AVG is a good antivirus program... and it's free, so you'll never have to worry about paying for new virus definitions. It's also... sadly... better than Norton in not only detecting harmful objects and removing them, but also doing these things in a much more timely and efficient manner (In short, Norton is a system hog, AVG isn't). Perhaps widespread adoption of AVG will inspire Symantec to ship a complete, functioning product.

Free ZoneAlarm (http://www.zonelabs.com/store/content/company/products/znalm/freeDownload.jsp)
- Yet another free security application for Windows XP that Mac users don't want you to know about. It's a really, really good firewall that allows you a lot of user control. While the built-in Windows firewall isn't bad, it's obviously the most frequently targeted (and thusly most frequently compromized) firewall out there. Firewalls are your computers first line of defense online, they keep malicious programs from getting on your computer without your permission.

Windows Defender (http://www.microsoft.com/athome/security/spyware/software/default.mspx)
- Windows Defender is a free antispyware application from Microsoft. It's very light on resources, and has ridiculously high detection/removal rates relative to other antispyware scanners. Definitely a must.

CCleaner (http://www.ccleaner.com/)
- This is a small, resource-friendly app that cleans crap off your computer. It's name is, in full, "Crap Cleaner." It removes stuff like temporary internet files and other temporary files used by other applications. It also has a very effective registry repairing function, which helps your computer run much more stably, and much more quickly.

You should download these and install them (and preferably update them, if you need help with that just holler). I need to know your operating system, and, also, do you know how to take screenshots and post them online?

try

http://housecall.trendmicro.com

jot down what it says the virus is and look it up online.

when you are done with this, if it doesnt fix the virus and you dont find anything about it online that will help, then shut down your computer and take it to a professional before its too damaged to start up at all.

Alright. Let's do this. :D

We can make you, and your computer have a wonderful computing experience henceforth and forever. You need a few simple programs to accomplish this.

AVG AntiVirus Free Edition (http://free.grisoft.com/)
- AVG is a good antivirus program... and it's free, so you'll never have to worry about paying for new virus definitions. It's also... sadly... better than Norton in not only detecting harmful objects and removing them, but also doing these things in a much more timely and efficient manner (In short, Norton is a system hog, AVG isn't). Perhaps widespread adoption of AVG will inspire Symantec to ship a complete, functioning product.

Free ZoneAlarm (http://www.zonelabs.com/store/content/company/products/znalm/freeDownload.jsp)
- Yet another free security application for Windows XP that Mac users don't want you to know about. It's a really, really good firewall that allows you a lot of user control. While the built-in Windows firewall isn't bad, it's obviously the most frequently targeted (and thusly most frequently compromized) firewall out there. Firewalls are your computers first line of defense online, they keep malicious programs from getting on your computer without your permission.

Windows Defender (http://www.microsoft.com/athome/security/spyware/software/default.mspx)
- Windows Defender is a free antispyware application from Microsoft. It's very light on resources, and has ridiculously high detection/removal rates relative to other antispyware scanners. Definitely a must.

CCleaner (http://www.ccleaner.com/)
- This is a small, resource-friendly app that cleans crap off your computer. It's name is, in full, "Crap Cleaner." It removes stuff like temporary internet files and other temporary files used by other applications. It also has a very effective registry repairing function, which helps your computer run much more stably, and much more quickly.

You should download these and install them (and preferably update them, if you need help with that just holler). I need to know your operating system, and, also, do you know how to take screenshots and post them online?
Windows XP Professional. And no, I don't know how to take screenshots but I do know its easy. I wouldn't be able to take screenshots for another couple of hours though.

Yeah, but "[I] holds?" Maybe my harping on this is a sign that I has too much time on my hands, but I doesn't think that your grammar is all that good.

you DON"T think Fiddle, not you DOESN"T.
HAS change to HAVE
All That change to very

Windows XP Professional. And no, I don't know how to take screenshots but I do know its easy. I wouldn't be able to take screenshots for another couple of hours though.
Lol.
Shift+printscreen and paste in paint or some program like that.

Lol.
Shift+printscreen and paste in paint or something like that.
OK, hopefully I can get to work on this tonight. Hope you're still around. If you don't hear from me, my computer is out laying on the pavement somewhere being run over by Mac trucks.

Alrighty. I'll be around. I'm bored... and I like helping out people with their computers. =D

Purge the filth that is N*rton from your HDD for all eternity, and use AVG.

That's... all I've got to say.

Purge the filth that is N*rton from your HDD for all eternity, and use AVG.

That's... all I've got to say.
Norton is a filthy little bedwetter, isn't he?

Reinstall your drivers. One probably got corrupted and Windows is stupid and cannot handle a driver crashing without going into safemode. Drivers belong in user-space, not kernel-space people!

First of all, get rid of Norton. It does more harm than good. Second of all, go out and buy a firewall (the condom for computers). Thirdly, go pick up a Mac. Nobody makes viruses for the Mac OS.:)

Reinstall your drivers. One probably got corrupted and Windows is stupid and cannot handle a driver crashing without going into safemode. Drivers belong in user-space, not kernel-space people!
But first I'll catch this pixie with my butterfly net.


(Really, I'm ridiculously computer impaired.)

Norton is a filthy little bedwetter, isn't he?

Something like that.

Ad Aware and multiple tries at different dates in System Restore somehow solved the problem. Thanks all. I've learned to hate Norton and improve my grammar in less than 3 full pages of posts.
Again, thanks for all the useful links and humor to keep me from bashing my computer.

But first I'll catch this pixie with my butterfly net.


(Really, I'm ridiculously computer impaired.)
Your computer can with a bunch of CD's. Start your computer in safe mode. Put in the first disk, go to the CD drive, and you should see something called setup or install. Open that. Hit next when the installer opens. Wait for it to install, close the installer. Repeat with the next disk. If you bought something like a Dell or HP., you can go to their website and download all the drivers from there.

Your computer can with a bunch of CD's. Start your computer in safe mode. Put in the first disk, go to the CD drive, and you should see something called setup or install. Open that. Hit next when the installer opens. Wait for it to install, close the installer. Repeat with the next disk. If you bought something like a Dell or HP., you can go to their website and download all the drivers from there.
Don't worry, I'm going to be coming back to this thread for reference. Right now, the computer is working and I plan on doing a bunch of everyone's recommendations on my day off.

First of all, get rid of Norton. It does more harm than good. Second of all, go out and buy a firewall (the condom for computers). Thirdly, go pick up a Mac. Nobody makes viruses for the Mac OS.:)
BS. Mac has a couple viruses. Although, he shouldn't need a second mortgage because he had a bad virus.

Let me start by stating my first major sin: I did not back, at any point in time, back up my computer onto disk. Cast your stones if you must but you cannot do more harm to me than I have done to my forehead as it pounds my desk.
Don't worry, I have never back up my data either.:)

Don't worry, I have never back up my data either.:)
I will, though. My computer is my precious. I <gollum> we swears it. Toshiba ---- precious...

BS. Mac has a couple viruses. Although, he shouldn't need a second mortgage because he had a bad virus.

Your right, Mac has a couple trojan viruses; not a plethora as with Windows.

BS. Mac has a couple viruses. Although, he shouldn't need a second mortgage because he had a bad virus.

This is true. OSX is not virus-proof by any stretch of the imagination. I have friends who code malware specifically targeted at the Mac just to prove that it is, in fact, effortlessly easy. :)

Mac users: do not encourage people to buy Macs! When will you learn? If you do that, you'll make them popular. Then you can say hello to the PC script-kiddies. ;)

Norton isn't bad.... it's just... AVG is better. Let's try and refrain from irrationally hating computer companies... unless they're Apple Computer. Anyways.

And no, I don't know how to take screenshots but I do know its easy.

The "Print Screen" key (it might say PrtScr) will take a picture of your entire screen and put it into your clipboard (It's as if you just right-clicked and selected "copy" on your screen) and you can paste it into a program like Microsoft Paint and save it.

To take a picture of a particular window, simply bring that window into the forground (select it) and hit Alt + Print Screen. Once again, this puts the image data into your clipboard, from which you simply use the "paste" function in MS Paint, save it as a JPEG (or a bitmap if you need to retain quality).

Also... if you have Windows Installer 3.1 and both .NET Framework 1.1 and .NET Framework 2.0 (to see if you have these, check your Add/Remove Programs list), you can download Paint.NET and save as a JPEG. Paint.NET is better than Microsoft Paint (though that's not saying much :D). It gives you much more customization when compressing JPEGs.

EDIT: I help people with their PC's... so that fewer people buy Macs. PC's are cheaper and faster. That's all there is to it. Mahaha.

Oh, fuck.
I'd rather hoped my illustration in my second post was sufficient pointage outing, but, no, you just had to keep going anyway.
How does it feel to win, huh? You feel good, now? Feel like a winner?
Pfft, this is NSG: we're all losers here.

you DON"T think Fiddle
Got it in one, Avy, my boy/dick-girl, got in in one.
Which is nice, because since you completely missed the irony you should at least have an oppurtunity to gain something.

I'd rather hoped my illustration in my second post was sufficient pointage outing, but, no, you just had to keep going anyway.

Pfft, this is NSG: we're all losers here.


Got it in one, Avy, my boy/dick-girl, got in in one.
Which is nice, because since you completely missed the irony you should at least have an oppurtunity to gain something.
I can't believe you would just dump all that salt in my open wounds.

Your right, Mac has a couple trojan viruses; not a plethora as with Windows.
Yes, but it is ridiculusly expensive, and has achieved a level of resource-whoredom that only Vista will beat.

I can't believe you would just dump all that salt in my open wounds.
Sorry, I was aiming for my french fries and must have missed. Or maybe I'm just feeling really bitchy tonight.

Sorry, I was aiming for my french fries and must have missed. Or maybe I'm just feeling really bitchy tonight.
Oh come on, there's plenty of fresh meat out there tonight. Give a man some peace.

Oh come on, there's plenty of fresh meat out there tonight. Give a man some peace.
Fresh meat is overrated. You need to let it age long enough to get tender before you can get the full effect.

This is odd. I am not responcible for the hijacking of a computer thread.

Fresh meat is overrated. You need to let it age long enough to get tender before you can get the full effect.
Cruelty. Unadulterated cruelty.

Cruelty. Unadulterated cruelty.
Adultery is a sin, says so in the 10 C's, but you'll find no notices against sadism in that most wonderful of ancient Jewish documents.
No, so long as you're still alive when I'm done I can do whatever I want and stay in YWHW's good books.

So... we fixing your computer or what? :D

I still recommend that people check out Avast. I always had problems with AVG freezing in the middle of a scan, and then it would whore resources to unfreeze. Avast is shiny, pirate-themed, and I haven't had that problem at all, and it's efficient and LOUD! Sounds like a massive siren is going off in the room when it detects something. *Is still trying to regain hearing in one ear* Unless you turn sounds off, of course, but still, it's efficient. It also appears to be a fair bit smaller than AVG (I haven't got fully-installed sizes, but the install .exe is only about 2/3 the size), and it does the updating without your needing to press buttons. (I noticed that even when I set it to update automatically, I had to update AVG manually, which really bugged me. Avast! does it automatically, and notifies you when it's been updated.)

I still recommend that people check out Avast. I always had problems with AVG freezing in the middle of a scan, and then it would whore resources to unfreeze. Avast is shiny, pirate-themed, and I haven't had that problem at all, and it's efficient and LOUD! Sounds like a massive siren is going off in the room when it detects something. *Is still trying to regain hearing in one ear* Unless you turn sounds off, of course, but still, it's efficient. It also appears to be a fair bit smaller than AVG (I haven't got fully-installed sizes, but the install .exe is only about 2/3 the size), and it does the updating without your needing to press buttons. (I noticed that even when I set it to update automatically, I had to update AVG manually, which really bugged me. Avast! does it automatically, and notifies you when it's been updated.)

Yes, I had Avast. It was good, but I uninstalled it. I liked the way it said "virus database has been updated"...good times.

I prefer Bullguard, though; it's nice and resource-intensive.

I still recommend that people check out Avast. I always had problems with AVG freezing in the middle of a scan, and then it would whore resources to unfreeze. Avast is shiny, pirate-themed, and I haven't had that problem at all, and it's efficient and LOUD! Sounds like a massive siren is going off in the room when it detects something. *Is still trying to regain hearing in one ear* Unless you turn sounds off, of course, but still, it's efficient. It also appears to be a fair bit smaller than AVG (I haven't got fully-installed sizes, but the install .exe is only about 2/3 the size), and it does the updating without your needing to press buttons. (I noticed that even when I set it to update automatically, I had to update AVG manually, which really bugged me. Avast! does it automatically, and notifies you when it's been updated.)

I use both. :D

How does one "remove" all Norton stuff? Is it as simple as deleteing a program or is it more involved than that?

I have it, I pay for it, I don't want to anymore.

Go to your control panel, click on Add/Remove Programs, then find it, kill it, and rejoice!