NationStates Jolt Archive

"George didn't know much about ranches when we bought the place. Andover and Yale don't have a real strong ranching program. But I'm proud of George. He's learned a lot about ranching since that first year when he tried to milk the horse. What's worse, it was a male horse."
-First Lady Laura Bush, at The White House Correspondant's Association Dinner, 2005

Well, it seems Bush had left university when he tried to milk a horse. So, I ask... How old were you when you first knew that male horses are not meant to be milked?

Random. And I have no idea.

Couldn't you just see Bush... "hey Laura.. I got some milk... but it seems to be curddled..."

Well, perhaps my family were a bit permissive with the animal husbandry ed, but I don't remember ever having to be told.

But we should not be too quick to point the fun. I was watching the tv show "Dirty Jobs" once, and they made the host of the show "milk" a stallion at a thoroughbred stud farm. I will not go into details, except to say it didn't take too long and the results were worth at least $25,000 -- in a baggie. I'll never forget the host shaking the baggie in front of the camera and saying, "All this can be yours if the price is right."

So I think this would be a good retirement business for GW. He should keep practicing.

"George didn't know much about ranches when we bought the place. Andover and Yale don't have a real strong ranching program. But I'm proud of George. He's learned a lot about ranching since that first year when he tried to milk the horse. What's worse, it was a male horse."
-First Lady Laura Bush, at The White House Correspondant's Association Dinner, 2005

Well, it seems Bush had left university when he tried to milk a horse. So, I ask... How old were you when you first knew that male horses are not meant to be milked?
HEY!!!

*props*
*props*
*props*
*points at self*
:(

EDIT:
http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=10873608&postcount=152
3.54 am!

im suddenly reminded of the movie "Kingpin"

HEY!!!

*props*
*props*
*props*
*points at self*
:(
Aw come on, this was too funny not to share. And how much funnier will it be if some Bush worshipper actually shows up to take offense?

Well, it is possible to milk a horse...

I've been milking for thirty years. I have milked everything from cows to cats. Horses are no different.

im suddenly reminded of the movie "Kingpin"
...Quaid pulling out beer of the fridge.
...reminds me of The UN abassadorship. :D

Aw come on, this was too funny not to share. And how much funnier will it be if some Bush worshipper actually shows up to take offense?
Of COUR$3.
It's just that he could've propped me on that one. :(

And you KNOW i could go ON and ON in the gaffe sense, but i suspect i'd get locked.

I've been milking for thirty years. I have milked everything from cows to cats. Horses are no different.
Milk a cat? You stole that from "Meet the Parents." Now let's find out if you are really George W. Bush: Have you ever milked a male cat? A male horse? A male cow? :p

I've been milking for thirty years. I have milked everything from cows to cats. Horses are no different.

"i had no idea you could milk a cat"

"yeah you can milk anything with nipples"

Milk a cat? You stole that from "Meet the Parents." Now let's find out if you are really George W. Bush: Have you ever milked a male cat? A male horse? A male cow? :p
Yes. The milk is good for muscles.

Of COUR$3.
It's just that he could've propped me on that one. :(

And you KNOW i could go ON and ON in the gaffe sense, but i suspect i'd get locked.
True.

Heikoku, give him his props.

Yes. The milk is good for muscles.

kinda like badger milk? :p

My other grandfather was a farmer. Actually did it by hand as a lesson to appreciate what the machines do now.....

Of COUR$3.
It's just that he could've propped me on that one. :(

And you KNOW i could go ON and ON in the gaffe sense, but i suspect i'd get locked.

Sorry, Straughn, my apologies. Here, have my supply of cookies. ;)

Everyone, this one was gently supplied to me by Straughn here. :)

Oh and I hope to GOD she was telling a joke. ;)

True.

Heikoku, give him his props.
Actually, he technically owes YOU props too, since i was responding to YOUR post when i posted that! :)

Originally Posted by Muravyets
Milk a cat? You stole that from "Meet the Parents." Now let's find out if you are really George W. Bush: Have you ever milked a male cat? A male horse? A male cow?
Yes. The milk is good for muscles.
YOU ARE GEORGE W. BUSH!!! :eek:

(What's wrong with this picture, kids?)



PS: Which muscles?

PPS: On second thought, don't answer that.

Sorry, Straughn, my apologies. Here, have my supply of cookies. ;)Ah, thankies. *munch*
Hey wait, what am i supposed to dip these in again? :eek:


Everyone, this one was gently supplied to me by Straughn here. :)
...emphasis on the idea, "gently". :D

Ah, thankies. *munch*
Hey wait, what am i supposed to dip these in again? :eek:

Horse... milk... EW!

Er, here. *Hands you a glass of COW milk. COW, not horse.*

Oh and I hope to GOD she was telling a joke. ;)
...the world may NEVER know.
...so sayeth the owl...

http://www.orlyowl.com/wtf.jpg

Actually, he technically owes YOU props too, since i was responding to YOUR post when i posted that! :)
Oh, pshaw. For my little jokiepoo-kins? Bush, cowboys, milking, Karl Rove -- the comedy practically writes itself.

"i had no idea you could milk a cat"

"yeah you can milk anything with nipples"
They stole that from my book.

Horse... milk... EW!

Er, here. *Hands you a glass of COW milk. COW, not horse.*
Thank you. It's better than a warm glass of STHU :)

They stole that from my book.

you should sue them. then make a movie about it...

They stole that from my book.
Is this your "Muse" riff?
*props*

Oh, pshaw. For my little jokiepoo-kins? Bush, cowboys, milking, Karl Rove -- the comedy practically writes itself.
It's all in the timing. *nods*

you should sue them. then make a movie about it...
It's in the works. :)

Is this your "Muse" riff?
*props*
:eek:

*shoots random people*

Oh, pshaw. For my little jokiepoo-kins? Bush, cowboys, milking, Karl Rove -- the comedy practically writes itself.

Ew. Ew. Ew. Ew. EW!!!

:p

It's in the works. :)

can i be one of the actors? i have amazing talent, and bulging muscles...

:eek:

*shoots random people*
Art again? What about smashing small animals on a canvas with a pulley system and an anvil?







*VERY obscure ref*

Roffle, taking a joke seriously.

I always knew that milk didn't come out of horses. It only came out of cows until I learnt about breastfeeding... which I don't remember learning.

can i be one of the actors? i have amazing talent, and bulging muscles...
You have exams young man :)

can i be one of the actors? i have amazing talent, and bulging muscles...

Sure, but you'll have to play love scenes with Bush...

Art again? What about smashing small animals on a canvas with a pulley system and an anvil?







*VERY obscure ref*
YES!

And then cast them in iron before they die!

Originally Posted by Secluded Islands
can i be one of the actors? i have amazing talent, and bulging muscles...
Sure, but you'll have to play love scenes with Bush...
"I wish I could quit you, Turd-blossom!"

YES!

And then cast them in iron before they die!
What, not bronze?


Points for originality, though.
Sorta.

What, not bronze?


Points for originality, though.
Sorta.
:rolleyes:

I was debating whether or not it was bronze or iron.. damn.

I'll take the points tho..

"I wish I could quit you, Turd-blossom!"
I rarely use this, but ....


ROTFLMAO to the exponential factor!
http://www.studip.uni-goettingen.de/pictures/smile/irre.gif

:rolleyes:

I was debating whether or not it was bronze or iron.. damn.

I'll take the points tho..
That's what your booties are for, silly!

That's what your booties are for, silly!
:rolleyes:

Well, I grew up on a farm and we hand milked. I started milking probably about 7 years old. Milked until college.

I could give you some real stories about how stupid city kids are about animals, sex, life, death, food supply in general.........

There are cultures that milk mares, but you would have to start out with the first colt and train them as you do cows.

The funny part of this story is the fact that Bush claims to be a rancher/cowboy, when he is obviously a blueblood. By the way did you all see how he held a hammer at a Habitat House?

:rolleyes:
If it makes you feel any better, mine weren't bronzed. They were dispensed of in a bomb disposal unit, like the first diaper, which they bafflingly saved as well.

I rarely use this, but ....


ROTFLMAO to the exponential factor!
http://www.studip.uni-goettingen.de/pictures/smile/irre.gif
Thank you very much. I'm here all week. Don't forget to tip your waitress. :D

One should take into account that this was the White House Correspondant's Dinner and mostly everything said there should be taken as a joke.

Just in case anybody actually took Laura Bush's quote seriously, which I assume that, hopefully, nobody did.

<snip>
The funny part of this story is the fact that Bush claims to be a rancher/cowboy, when he is obviously a blueblood. By the way did you all see how he held a hammer at a Habitat House?
Did he hold it like a cowboy would have? (My god, how am I ever going to sleep tonight?)

Anyway...Yeah, a Connecticut Yankee in King Redneck's Court. I can't stand watching all these Nascar morons sucking up that fake Beverly Hillbillies accent of his. "Yessiree-bob, he's one of us, all right!" Please, he grew up wiping his shoes on people like them.

One should take into account that this was the White House Correspondant's Dinner and mostly everything said there should be taken as a joke.

Just in case anybody actually took Laura Bush's quote seriously, which I assume that, hopefully, nobody did.
Oh, thank god you arrived and cleared that up for us. Well, I guess we can close this thread then, huh?

If it makes you feel any better, mine weren't bronzed. They were dispensed of in a bomb disposal unit, like the first diaper, which they bafflingly saved as well.
Awwww

*points and laughs*

Don't forget to tip your waitress. :D
Okay!
Don't eat toast in bed!

One should take into account that this was the White House Correspondant's Dinner and mostly everything said there should be taken as a joke.
Perfectly in order, since McClellan and the guy before him (and quite likely the new FauX guy will have) made it patently clear that everything the current administration is engaged in is equitable with a bad joke.

Just in case anybody actually took Laura Bush's quote seriously, which I assume that, hopefully, nobody did.
It's good for context. Which is why the link is good to peruse:

http://politicalhumor.about.com/od/laurabush/a/laurabushcomedy.htm

Certainly there are more to run with here.

Awwww

*points and laughs*
Well, it was either that or smash BOTH items with an anvil. They don't talk much about it or what happened. Good thing it's on public record.

Well, I grew up on a farm and we hand milked. I started milking probably about 7 years old. Milked until college.

I could give you some real stories about how stupid city kids are about animals, sex, life, death, food supply in general.........

There are cultures that milk mares, but you would have to start out with the first colt and train them as you do cows.

The funny part of this story is the fact that Bush claims to be a rancher/cowboy, when he is obviously a blueblood. By the way did you all see how he held a hammer at a Habitat House?

Oh, mind you that I'm a city person. The city is my habitat and I feel perfectly fine in it. In fact, I'm not a fan of farm life at all. But even I knew at 4 that you milk COWS. Or, at least, FEMALE animals. :D

Well, it was either that or smash BOTH items with an anvil. They don't talk much about it or what happened. Good thing it's on public record.
I see..

I see..
If you had to choose one sense, that one's okay, because as i understand it, the occasion was equally offensive to all senses.
Another one of those sullen holiday issues everyone dances around, IIRC.

Oh, mind you that I'm a city person. The city is my habitat and I feel perfectly fine in it. In fact, I'm not a fan of farm life at all. But even I knew at 4 that you milk COWS. Or, at least, FEMALE animals. :D
Reading back over this thread so far, I'm starting to fear that us city kids learned this earlier than the farm kids did. I so don't want to think about how that could be.

If you had to choose one sense, that one's okay, because as i understand it, the occasion was equally offensive to all senses.
Another one of those sullen holiday issues everyone dances around, IIRC.
You confuse me.

I need a smoke now.

You confuse me.

I need a smoke now.
Hahahahahaha!!!!!!
*FLORT*
The SJS experience.

I didn't even have to mention "iguana anus". Thanks for not tasking me so.

Reading back over this thread so far, I'm starting to fear that us city kids learned this earlier than the farm kids did. I so don't want to think about how that could be.

What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas...

Reading back over this thread so far, I'm starting to fear that us city kids learned this earlier than the farm kids did. I so don't want to think about how that could be.
Same way we learned about drugs and body parts of the opposite sex. In the bathroom stall at the public school.

What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas...
;)

Same way we learned about drugs and body parts of the opposite sex. In the bathroom stall at the public school.
That accounts for us. What do these farm kids get up to? (No, don't tell me.) Maybe they need to keep horses in the bathrooms of public schools in places like Kansas (and Andover).

Sure, but you'll have to play love scenes with Bush...

*looks for vodka*

That accounts for us. What do these farm kids get up to? (No, don't tell me.) Maybe they need to keep horses in the bathrooms of public schools in places like Kansas (and Andover).I don't see a down side to that. *nods*
I like your ideas. I submit my vote for you if you ever run for office within my district.

Same way we learned about drugs and body parts of the opposite sex. In the bathroom stall at the public school.

He wins the thread, ladies and gentlemen!

He wins the thread, ladies and gentlemen!
*bows*
Hey, Muravyets AGAIN has credit, since i was AGAIN responding to her when i posted.

...ooh, kinda creepy. :eek:

...ooh, kinda creepy. :eek:

Not as creepy as learning about milking farm animals in the bathroom. :D

Not as creepy as learning about milking farm animals in the bathroom. :D
I guess it depends on your POV. Given my "liberal" upbringing, i don't see a problem with forcing taxpayers to fund it. It was good enough for my more impressionable years, so why not?
As it is, i may just have to draw the line at bathroom surgery ... although i am ACTUALLY PARTY to bathroom piercing. Truly. But that's for another thread with Sarkhaan :D

I always had that thought about male cows(bulls?).

What would happen if one of them got on a milking machine

I always had that thought about male cows(bulls?).

What would happen if one of them got on a milking machine

He'd be able to make lots of money selling his picture in the internet. :p

Isnt this JOKE from last year? Is someone really just hearing about it now,for the first time?

Isnt this JOKE from last year? Is someone really just hearing about it now,for the first time?

Oh, I know the joke is old, but what I DID with it is the twist. ;)

*bows*
Hey, Muravyets AGAIN has credit, since i was AGAIN responding to her when i posted.

...ooh, kinda creepy. :eek:
You just ride my coattails. I swear, you're such a parasite. When I run for office in your district, you can be the radio talk show host I secretly pay to make me look good by riffing off my jokes. :)

Sorry if someone already brought this up, but does anyone remember the commercial a few years ago? I think it was a "Got milk?" one.

The man wakes up in the morning and pours himself a bowl of cereal.
He has no milk and he looks out the window and sees a cow.
He walks out and puts his bowl beneath the cow.
His roomates have woken up and are watching out the window.
One turns to the other and asks "Do you think we should tell him that's a male cow?"
The other replies "No, he'll figure it out."
But the first guy is still out underneath the cow and you hear it moo.

Sorry if someone already brought this up, but does anyone remember the commercial a few years ago? I think it was a "Got milk?" one.

The man wakes up in the morning and pours himself a bowl of cereal.
He has no milk and he looks out the window and sees a cow.
He walks out and puts his bowl beneath the cow.
His roomates have woken up and are watching out the window.
One turns to the other and asks "Do you think we should tell him that's a male cow?"
The other replies "No, he'll figure it out."
But the first guy is still out underneath the cow and you hear it moo.
That was week #1 on the Crawford ranch. The horse was week #2. :)

you do realize that they do "milk" stallions?

you do realize that they do "milk" stallions?

Then Bush would drink the...?

Oh my God, you've just made me puke things I haven't even eaten yet...

you do realize that they do "milk" stallions?
Yeah, yeah, I saw it on tv:
Originally posted by Muravyets
But we should not be too quick to point the fun. I was watching the tv show "Dirty Jobs" once, and they made the host of the show "milk" a stallion at a thoroughbred stud farm. I will not go into details, except to say it didn't take too long and the results were worth at least $25,000 -- in a baggie. I'll never forget the host shaking the baggie in front of the camera and saying, "All this can be yours if the price is right."

So I think this would be a good retirement business for GW. He should keep practicing.
It was quite an image, let me tell you.

i believe you, i've seen it in real life.

you do realize that they do "milk" stallions?
Haven't seen a stallion "milked", but have seen a bull harvested for semen. They stick an electrode up the anal opening, then someone holds a wire, with a loop and a plastic bag on the loop, over the male organ. Then he's zapped with the electrode and out comes the semen, into the plastic bag.

i doubt the thought even crossed my mind til i was about 7.

Haven't seen a stallion "milked", but have seen a bull harvested for semen. They stick an electrode up the anal opening, then someone holds a wire, with a loop and a plastic bag on the loop, over the male organ. Then he's zapped with the electrode and out comes the semen, into the plastic bag.
It was more fun for the stallion on the tv show. A veterinarian used an "artificial vagina" equipped with a baggy to catch the semen. The stallion mounted a mare-like frame -- a party-mare-doll? -- and the host stood in for the vet actually holding the artificial vagina for the stallion. They got the stallion worked up by bringing a mare in heat into the room. They won't let the horses mate naturally because (A) they might fight and (B) they sell the semen to owners of several different mares. I have to give the tv show host points for not flinching.

(B) they sell the semen to owners of several different mares.
They sell the semen of bulls also. All dairy are artificial insemination. A lot of beef cattle are also. One ejaculation can handle dozens of females. Boars (pigs) are even more potent. One shot can do hundreds.

The semen is put in small straws and quick frozen in nitrogen. and either delivered by special truck or mailed. The farmer/breeder looks through huge catalogs (or now the internet) to choose just the right bull for the cow. How far apart the calves teats are and how large, how long of legs, how much milk, birth weight, speed of weight gain... dozens of criteria. With beef the whole herd of cows are given a shot that forces them to release eggs all at the same time. Dairy are bred as they "come in". The straw is taken out of the nitrogen, then the breeder puts on a long plastic glove that goes up to the the shoulder. He reaches in and places the straw. 9 months and 9 days later we have a calf.

The cost can be from a few dollars to tens of thousands of dollars per straw. Depending on how good the bull is and how much demand for his sperm.

You just ride my coattails. I swear, you're such a parasite. When I run for office in your district, you can be the radio talk show host I secretly pay to make me look good by riffing off my jokes. :)
Done and done, my master. Perhaps you'd permit me to rub your feet after you cleat me on the back, master? :D

Oh, I know the joke is old, but what I DID with it is the twist. ;)
Yeah, but your poll is flawed. Where's the "I never learned, and i never will, especially since i never learn anything from teh internets"?
Hmmm, perhaps a tad long. Oh well, Myrth then?

Then Bush would drink the...?

Oh my God, you've just made me puke things I haven't even eaten yet...
Oh don't act so surprised. Surely you've known he's been likewise milking fundamentalists for years now in the exact same fashion.

It was more fun for the stallion on the tv show. A veterinarian used an "artificial vagina" equipped with a baggy to catch the semen. The stallion mounted a mare-like frame -- a party-mare-doll? -- and the host stood in for the vet actually holding the artificial vagina for the stallion. They got the stallion worked up by bringing a mare in heat into the room. They won't let the horses mate naturally because (A) they might fight and (B) they sell the semen to owners of several different mares. I have to give the tv show host points for not flinching.
That's 'cuz even though Mike Rowe is horribly caustic, and a lot of people watch for the same reason they watch hockey and car races, he agreed (in bitchy but good character) ... and besides i doubt it's the first time he's mentioned a product in a baggie for $ ... even sperm, i suspect (the early days) .....
... and even better is that particular episode has been replayed a few times in the "Viewer's Choice" block, IIRC. Wasn't the sow insemination on that one too? That was ickier.

Just dropped in to tell you all just how disgusted I am with you all. Bye now. :D

Just dropped in to tell you all just how disgusted I am with you all. Bye now. :DPraise from Caesar!!
Happy campers, indeed. :D

Praise from Caesar!!
Happy campers, indeed. :D

Welcome to the Wonderful World of Irony. The coat check girl will now collect your coats just prior to our turning on the sprinkler system for the evening's entertainment.

Welcome to the Wonderful World of Irony. The coat check girl will now collect your coats just prior to our turning on the sprinkler system for the evening's entertainment.Sprinkler? :gundge:
Zeus, i presume?


My buttons are only lightly pressed.
As is, i've still got the iguana anus anecdote AND the Roseanne Barr pregnancy episode fresh in front-page rotation.
Well, perhaps not the iguana anus.

I would comment, but I need to be careful about what I say......

I would comment, but I need to be careful about what I say......
About the above posts, or the OP?
Enquiring minds want to know.

About the above posts, or the OP?
Enquiring minds want to know.


I can't divulge, but safe to say that its best that I don't...

*shifty eyes*

I can't divulge, but safe to say that its best that I don't...

*shifty eyes*
Oh, how bad can it b*gets smacked with waffle iron*
...
...
..
.


...
Uhm ... feel free to indulge. Whatever embarassment you might feel from whatever you say, i'm liable to amplify that by a factor of 3. (Not 4, since i'm not "The Miracle Worker")

Give a hint, then?

I am returned from a period of banishment due to my saying things....

and you didn't even miss me....

BUT what can I expect what with the feeble number of my posts...

I am returned from a period of banishment due to my saying things....

and you didn't even miss me....

BUT what can I expect what with the feeble number of my posts...
Says who, i didn't miss you?
I'm not a mod, you know. Besides, i had a busy weekend. Is that when it happened?
Admittedly, the mods do let me get away with A LOT. Except for GMC Military Arms and Katganistan - they both got me with something or other.
Mostly Harmless.

Cabra West had a thread a while back of posters people'd miss, and i put you on it.

Says who, i didn't miss you?
I'm not a mod, you know. Besides, i had a busy weekend. Is that when it happened?
Admittedly, the mods do let me get away with A LOT. Except for GMC Military Arms and Katganistan - they both got me with something or other.
Mostly Harmless.

Cabra West had a thread a while back of posters people'd miss, and i put you on it.


Thank you, I love you, but in a brother/sister kind of way and with no funny stuff or I shall get punished....

*even more shifty eyes*

Thank you, I love you, but in a brother/sister kind of way and with no funny stuff or I shall get punished....

*even more shifty eyes*
Hey, that reminds me ....
you might be able to use this ...
http://67.18.37.16/1381/85/emo/shiftyeyes.gif

There.
So are you posting so nebulously due your Canuck?
I don't need to know much. Besides, my actuality is worse than my rep, and i don't suffer too much from it.

Hey, that reminds me ....
you might be able to use this ...
http://67.18.37.16/1381/85/emo/shiftyeyes.gif

There.
So are you posting so nebulously due your Canuck?
I don't need to know much. Besides, my actuality is worse than my rep, and i don't suffer too much from it.

Oh no!! my Canuck is the worlds best and most wonderful man. It is because I got forum banned...for a WEEK....along with Cabra West, who seems to not have come back....I suffer from a liberality of mind that got me into trouble without me being aware that what I thought was harmless fun was offensive....

Oh no!! my Canuck is the worlds best and most wonderful man. It is because I got forum banned...for a WEEK....along with Cabra West, who seems to not have come back....I suffer from a liberality of mind that got me into trouble without me being aware that what I thought was harmless fun was offensive....
Oh. I check the Moderation line in the forum intro just to see if anyone has taken any real offense to me. Not yet.
Sorry to hear that happened to you. Sometimes, it's just in the hands of mod.

Nightie. *waves*

Nightie. *waves*

:fluffle:

Sleep well!

:fluffle:

Sleep well!
No, unfortunately. I made a few mistakes.

They sell the semen of bulls also. All dairy are artificial insemination. A lot of beef cattle are also. One ejaculation can handle dozens of females. Boars (pigs) are even more potent. One shot can do hundreds.<snip>
Yep, I know (don't remember how old I was when I learned it, though ;)). It's just that they apparently use a more natural (if somewhat kinky) method on the thoroughbreds. I don't know if this is because the electrode method is definitely dangerous for horses, or because it might be dangerous and their insurance won't cover it. Or maybe it's because the naturalistic methods are unsafe for the veterinarians when dealing with bulls. But for whatever reason, race horse studs have more fun than bulls.

Done and done, my master. Perhaps you'd permit me to rub your feet after you cleat me on the back, master? :D
If you insist. :)

If you insist. :)
By your command.
I in no way mean to sound pushy.
I know my place.
:)

<snip> That was ickier.
The whole animal husbandry hour was pretty rough, queasiness-wise. One of those shows that proves Green Acres is not the life for me. :D

The whole animal husbandry hour was pretty rough, queasiness-wise. One of those shows that proves Green Acres is not the life for me. :D
I can't even handle the smell. There's no way i could do all the rest of that jazz. Further, with as much time as it requires, one *really* has to "love their work".

By your command.
I in no way mean to sound pushy.
I know my place.
:)
OK, here's the deal: I don't really like getting foot massages (don't like being fussed over), but I do like the idea of having a foot masseur on staff and on call. So I'll just siphon off campaign money to pay you to do nothing. How's that sound?

OK, here's the deal: I don't really like getting foot massages (don't like being fussed over), but I do like the idea of having a foot masseur on staff and on call. So I'll just siphon off campaign money to pay you to do nothing. How's that sound?
It sounds like i'm an appointee of the Bush administration!
:(

I can't even handle the smell. There's no way i could do all the rest of that jazz. Further, with as much time as it requires, one *really* has to "love their work".
Ugh. I didn't even love my last boyfriend that much.

It sounds like i'm an appointee of the Bush administration!
:(
Hey, man, don't screw with a winning formula. And wouldn't it be worth the death of both our ethics just so that when Chris Matthews says, "Ms. Muravyets, how do you answer these charges that you illegally used campaign funds to pay for a personal, full-time foot masseur?", I can look him right in the eye and say with all honesty, "I have never received a foot massage in my life"?

Oh don't act so surprised. Surely you've known he's been likewise milking fundamentalists for years now in the exact same fashion.

Ew. Ew. Ew. Ew. Ew. Ew.

EW!

Ugh. I didn't even love my last boyfriend that much.
Hahaha!
Oh wait, that's kinda depressing.
;)

I heard a pretty funny analogy once about why guys shouldn't expect girls to make certain concessions to them. Believe it or not, i have a certain standard of dignity that makes me not explain it further.
In the stead, i'll simply make allusion to a certain situation in Happy Gilmore, where Ben Stiller confronts a certain grandma over a certain beverage.
Then, cross-ref to post-nasal drip. *nods*

Hey, man, don't screw with a winning formula. And wouldn't it be worth the death of both our ethics just so that when Chris Matthews says, "Ms. Muravyets, how do you answer these charges that you illegally used campaign funds to pay for a personal, full-time foot masseur?", I can look him right in the eye and say with all honesty, "I have never received a foot massage in my life"?
What's wrong with "I can't remember." and "I have no recollection, Senator." - that's obviously been a winning formula for republicans at least since Reagan!

Ew. Ew. Ew. Ew. Ew. Ew.

EW!
The holy nozzle of love got him off the bottle, IIRC.

Besides, it harkens back to his "hazy" college days, as a snifter inbetween sniffs.

Knock it off, Heikoku.