NationStates Jolt Archive

1. Why is Chewbacca unable to pronounce his own name?

2. Why do Jedi fight as though they are swinging broadswords? Surely if your blade is extremely light and has a killing point you should be fencing with it, not hacking?

3. Why do blaster bolts travel slower than bullets? After all you can see blaster bolts coming, but you can't see bullets coming.

4. Why are there so many planets that are all desert, all forest, all ice, etc.? Are these planets so poor they can only afford one ecosystem?

5. If the force runs in families, why on earth do Jedi have to be celibate? Surely there should be a Jedi breeding program with male Jedi encouraged to donate sperm as often as possible? Wouldn't Yoda be saying, "Handle a light sabre you shall, but handle something else first you must!"

1. Why is Chewbacca unable to pronounce his own name?

Good question. Perhaps it was simply a name given to him by the common speakers? Maybe it's explained in one of the books.


2. Why do Jedi fight as though they are swinging broadswords? Surely if your blade is extremely light and has a killing point you should be fencing with it, not hacking?

Good point. However, I haven't read any the books and I don't remember hearing about how heavy or light they actually are.

3. Why do blaster bolts travel slower than bullets? After all you can see blaster bolts coming, but you can't see bullets coming.

You can if it's a tracer round.

4. Why are there so many planets that are all desert, all forest, all ice, etc.? Are these planets so poor they can only afford one ecosystem?

Haha

5. If the force runs in families, why on earth do Jedi have to be celibate? Surely there should be a Jedi breeding program with male Jedi encouraged to donate sperm as often as possible? Wouldn't Yoda be saying, "Handle a light sabre you shall, but handle something else first you must!"

If I recall, Jedi can't have anything to lose. Losing a child could cause so much pain that they'd go to the Dark Side.

okay, I got one.

In Episode I they talk about how there are no more Sith, and then they get all excited about Anakin "balancing the force", well the force was unbalanced in their favor, so why the hell didn't they see that Anakin was bad news?

1. He can, his accent is just too strong for the rest of us to make out what he is saying.
2. Yes.
3. If you see the blast, you're already dead. No, wait - that's tornados.
4. Intentionally left blank.
5. Much like the Catholic church. Priesthood runs in families and though priests have to be celibate there is no shortage of priests. It's a don't ask, don't tell sort of policy.

1. Why is Chewbacca unable to pronounce his own name?
Dunno. Though my girlfriend can't pronounce her own name.

2. Why do Jedi fight as though they are swinging broadswords? Surely if your blade is extremely light and has a killing point you should be fencing with it, not hacking?
Makes for better fight scenes.

3. Why do blaster bolts travel slower than bullets? After all you can see blaster bolts coming, but you can't see bullets coming.
Makes for better battle scenes.

4. Why are there so many planets that are all desert, all forest, all ice, etc.? Are these planets so poor they can only afford one ecosystem?
The Force.

5. If the force runs in families, why on earth do Jedi have to be celibate? Surely there should be a Jedi breeding program with male Jedi encouraged to donate sperm as often as possible? Wouldn't Yoda be saying, "Handle a light sabre you shall, but handle something else first you must!"
Their ejaculation would be so strong it would kill the woman.
But then there'd be massive fights at IVF clinics, when all the women try to get the Jedi jizz. There'd be stampedes, deaths...it'd be terrible.
No, because although Yoda is many things, he is not a perv.

If I recall, Jedi can't have anything to lose. Losing a child could cause so much pain that they'd go to the Dark Side.

I think sex plus contraception would be a good way to avoid sexual frustration that could lead to the dark side.

1. Why is Chewbacca unable to pronounce his own name?

IIRC, the canon explanation is that Wookiees cannot pronounce Basic (aka English), and humans cannot pronounce the Wookiee language (Shryiwook?). Therefore, Chewbacca *can* pronounce his name as it is pronounced in Shryiwook, but not as it is pronounced in English.

(Tally one for the "memorizing random Star Wars trivia" department.)

2. Why do Jedi fight as though they are swinging broadswords? Surely if your blade is extremely light and has a killing point you should be fencing with it, not hacking?

The technobabble explanation is that lightsabers produce "gyroscopic forces" that make them inherently hard to control (this is also the technobabble reason that most Star Wars denizens use blasters rather than lightsabers).

The real reason, of course, is that the lightsaber prop has a heavy material blade, so the actors have to wield it like a broadsword. :)

3. Why do blaster bolts travel slower than bullets? After all you can see blaster bolts coming, but you can't see bullets coming.

Come on, it's no fun if the hero gets hit by a bullet/energy beam that he can't see (and therefore can't block or dodge)!

4. Why are there so many planets that are all desert, all forest, all ice, etc.? Are these planets so poor they can only afford one ecosystem?

This is just a science fiction cliche... get used to it, or start making your own science fiction. :)

5. If the force runs in families, why on earth do Jedi have to be celibate? Surely there should be a Jedi breeding program with male Jedi encouraged to donate sperm as often as possible? Wouldn't Yoda be saying, "Handle a light sabre you shall, but handle something else first you must!"

This is probably because the Jedi are patterned off of monastic orders (and/or the Knights Templar, though I can't remember if the Templar were celibate)... it may also be intended to show that many of the Jedi rules are indeed stupid and/or outdated, and thus in need of a redesign.

Luckily, all of the stupid rules apparently are forgotten after the Jedi Purge (according to the Expanded Universe, that is).

(and/or the Knights Templar, though I can't remember if the Templar were celibate)

They were meant to be, but Templars tended to ignore a lot of their own rules.

okay, I got one.

In Episode I they talk about how there are no more Sith, and then they get all excited about Anakin "balancing the force", well the force was unbalanced in their favor, so why the hell didn't they see that Anakin was bad news?


Well in episode three, yoda makes mention that maybe the prophecy was misread. Also, many would argue that Anakin DOES balance the force by killing the Emperor in ROTJ.

This one is quite old, but what exactly did Han Solo mean when he said that "It's the ship that made the Kessel run in less than twelve parsecs!" ?

1. Why is Chewbacca unable to pronounce his own name?

2. Why do Jedi fight as though they are swinging broadswords? Surely if your blade is extremely light and has a killing point you should be fencing with it, not hacking?

3. Why do blaster bolts travel slower than bullets? After all you can see blaster bolts coming, but you can't see bullets coming.

4. Why are there so many planets that are all desert, all forest, all ice, etc.? Are these planets so poor they can only afford one ecosystem?

5. If the force runs in families, why on earth do Jedi have to be celibate? Surely there should be a Jedi breeding program with male Jedi encouraged to donate sperm as often as possible? Wouldn't Yoda be saying, "Handle a light sabre you shall, but handle something else first you must!"

1) He prolly can say his name in his own language..just not in english
2) Maybe the actors had heavy props?
3)Because...its awesome
4)Maybe George was trying to show that not every place in the universe is as complex. And if you read some of the books, you realize there are some differentiated planets..oh in the movies..look at like...naboo, or alderaan...
5)The force sometimes runs in families. But say I could have a father and mother with no force powers, but for me i have a extremly high midichlorine count, that means i have the force.. Such was the case with Anakin Skywalker. his mother had no force powers, and he had no father(unless you prescribe to the theory that Darth Plagerious-Darth sidious' master- created Anakin out of the force, since he had to power to create new life;) )

This one is quite old, but what exactly did Han Solo mean when he said that "It's the ship that made the Kessel run in less than twelve parsecs!" ?


They mistakingly used a measure of distance as a measure of time..

5)The force sometimes runs in families. But say I could have a father and mother with no force powers, but for me i have a extremly high midichlorine count, that means i have the force.. Such was the case with Anakin Skywalker. his mother had no force powers, and he had no father(unless you prescribe to the theory that Darth Plagerious-Darth sidious' master- created Anakin out of the force, since he had to power to create new life )

Darth Plagerious probably could have saved himself a lot of trouble if he had just gotten himself some proper sex education instead of that abstinance only crap. Then he would have realised that he wouldn't need to be a dark lord of the sith in order to create new life.

They mistakingly used a measure of distance as a measure of time..
No they didn’t. The Kessal run is an area of space near the planet Kessal filled with obstacles such as tiny black holes and asteroids. Most ships have to take an extremely long and careful route through it, but the Millennium Falcon was powerful enough and fast enough to fly through the area in a close to a straight line as has ever been done before.
Straight lines take up less distance than a zigzagged one, thus you would brag about the space traveled.

No they didn’t. The Kessal run is an area of space near the planet Kessal filled with obstacles such as tiny black holes and asteroids. Most ships have to take an extremely long and careful route through it, but the Millennium Falcon was powerful enough and fast enough to fly through the area in a close to a straight line as has ever been done before.
Straight lines take up less distance than a zigzagged one, thus you would brag about the space traveled.


Oh...ok. That was something I read on a site that nit picks every "mistake" of movies. I like you version better;)

Darth Plagerious probably could have saved himself a lot of trouble if he had just gotten himself some proper sex education instead of that abstinance only crap. Then he would have realised that he wouldn't need to be a dark lord of the sith in order to create new life.


who'd want a wrinkly old guy anyway? unless he's filthy rich or has a big bone I hardly see any girl fall for Darth Sidious...

1. Why is Chewbacca unable to pronounce his own name?

Chewbacca is probably the closest approximation that Basic can make of Chewbacca's Shyrriwook name.


2. Why do Jedi fight as though they are swinging broadswords? Surely if your blade is extremely light and has a killing point you should be fencing with it, not hacking?

Technically, there are a multiplicity of fighting styles, but only a few are specifically designed for lightsaber dueling. The Type-II style used by Count Dooku, for instance, is a dueling-based style of saber combat. Most however are designed for anti-blaster work, and you can't fence a heavy blaster shot. As such, given that swinging a saber broadsword is a better technique against the weapons Jedi most commonly come up against (remember, the Sith had been gone for hundreds if not thousands of years by the events of Episodes I-III), it makes more sense that most Jedi learned techniques beneficial to their situation.

Out of universe, the reason why people look like they're swinging broadswords is because neither David Prowse, Alec Guiness, or Mark Hamill had ever been trained in swordsmanship, and it's easier to swing at each other with big clobbering blows than it is to do difficult parrying maneuvers, especially when Prowse couldn't even see out of his Vader helmet. After that, the overall style just kind of stuck, although other people like Christopher Lee (who is a trained fencer) offered different and unique styles of combat.


3. Why do blaster bolts travel slower than bullets? After all you can see blaster bolts coming, but you can't see bullets coming.


That's because bullets aren't light-reflective. Tracers usually seem to come in at about the same rate as blaster shots.


4. Why are there so many planets that are all desert, all forest, all ice, etc.? Are these planets so poor they can only afford one ecosystem?


You're looking at a few select worlds and drawing a false inference from them. Tattooine is supposed to be marginally habitable, and it makes sense that Geonosis and Hoth would be inhospitable: they're both places hiding bases that aren't supposed to be there. The very fact most of the movies focus on rebels hiding from an overarching government already skews us to see more inhospitable planets than most. Additionally, you have to remember that most planets aren't going to get the Goldilocks orbit around a single star like Earth: most systems are binary or trinary systems, and most planets are likely to be too close or too far from their suns to support life. It seems likely then that many planets that actually are colonized are only going to be barely habitable.


5. If the force runs in families, why on earth do Jedi have to be celibate? Surely there should be a Jedi breeding program with male Jedi encouraged to donate sperm as often as possible? Wouldn't Yoda be saying, "Handle a light sabre you shall, but handle something else first you must!"

If you have children, you have attachments to the world, and those attachments can be manipulated to turn you against the Force and use it for evil purposes. The Jedi Code may seem stupid, but it was developed as the safest way to shield Jedi from the Dark Side: by having no attachments, they are less likely to be swayed by their passions into using their powers for those passions.

Out of universe, the reason why people look like they're swinging broadswords is because neither David Prowse, Alec Guiness, or Mark Hamill had ever been trained in swordsmanship, and it's easier to swing at each other with big clobbering blows than it is to do difficult parrying maneuvers, especially when Prowse couldn't even see out of his Vader helmet. After that, the overall style just kind of stuck, although other people like Christopher Lee (who is a trained fencer) offered different and unique styles of combat.

This is interesting. I assumed that because Christopher Lee is getting on a bit in age a lot of his fights scenes must have been done digitally, with his face put on stuntmen and so on. I never thought he might have been an influence on Count Dooku's fighting style.

1. Why is Chewbacca unable to pronounce his own name?

2. Why do Jedi fight as though they are swinging broadswords? Surely if your blade is extremely light and has a killing point you should be fencing with it, not hacking?
Canon: It's more plasma then light, plasma contained in a pulsating magnetic field, so it'd be as heavy as a lead-pipe.


3. Why do blaster bolts travel slower than bullets? After all you can see blaster bolts coming, but you can't see bullets coming.

you assume that it's a laser, which it isn't it's also a plasma being fired..


4. Why are there so many planets that are all desert, all forest, all ice, etc.? Are these planets so poor they can only afford one ecosystem?

Naboo, Dantooine, Naboo's moon Rori for example have multiple ecosystems

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Star_Wars_planets


5. If the force runs in families, why on earth do Jedi have to be celibate? Surely there should be a Jedi breeding program with male Jedi encouraged to donate sperm as often as possible? Wouldn't Yoda be saying, "Handle a light sabre you shall, but handle something else first you must!"

Celibacy as stated before makes it impossible for jedi to have any kin or loved ones to lose...making it harder for them to fall.

Och and Yeah, the jedi were stupid for not realising that balance means balance, not necessarily mean "make the good guys stronger and eliminate evil"...Luke disrupted the balance in the favor of good tough...by getting vader to protect him from the emperor and thus saving his father from the dark side...

This is interesting. I assumed that because Christopher Lee is getting on a bit in age a lot of his fights scenes must have been done digitally, with his face put on stuntmen and so on. I never thought he might have been an influence on Count Dooku's fighting style.

That's why he had a curved lightsaber handle: it allowed him to fence in his traditional style more readily than the straight-handled variety.

1. Why is Chewbacca unable to pronounce his own name?
Because he can't speak English. Unless grunting and growling is how kids these days talk...? :D

2. Why do Jedi fight as though they are swinging broadswords? Surely if your blade is extremely light and has a killing point you should be fencing with it, not hacking?
Because it's easier to block a lot of blaster shots coming at you by swinging your sword around, esp. if they're coming in from multiple directions. Dooku, who did use a fencing-like form when he fought, pwned the other Jedi because of this.

3. Why do blaster bolts travel slower than bullets? After all you can see blaster bolts coming, but you can't see bullets coming.
Because bullets aren't all that reflective. You can see a comet coming, doesn't mean it isn't going fast as hell.

4. Why are there so many planets that are all desert, all forest, all ice, etc.? Are these planets so poor they can only afford one ecosystem?
Because sometimes the planet is too far or too close to get the perfect Earth-like climate. Or you've turned your planet into a giant city-world like Coruscant. And you only ever see a few spots on those planets that are Earth-like, I'm sure Naboo has its share of deserts and tundra.

5. If the force runs in families, why on earth do Jedi have to be celibate? Surely there should be a Jedi breeding program with male Jedi encouraged to donate sperm as often as possible? Wouldn't Yoda be saying, "Handle a light sabre you shall, but handle something else first you must!"
For one, it's to keep a few very powerful families from dominating the Order by pumping out as many powerful little bastards as they can. Also, it was suppose to keep Jedi from having attachments that can be used to manipulate them to the Dark Side, but we all know how that turned out... :D

That's why he had a curved lightsaber handle: it allowed him to fence in his traditional style more readily than the straight-handled variety.

I never noticed that!