NationStates Jolt Archive

I'm just making a fool of myself. If I were talking, it would be some slurred gibberish. Best go to bed.

Bah, you have an IQ five points higher than me.

I don't particually rate IQ as a measure of anything, but still, pride dictates that I throw ketchup at you in a fit of rage.
Depends what test you took. There are IQ tests that you cannot score higher than 130 in. Thus Mensa goes on percentages.

Not at all; it seems safe to assume that they all have parents, and are therefore sons.
Yeah, well, I don't feel well. :(

I'm just making a fool of myself. If I were talking, it would be some slurred gibberish. Best go to bed.
No! Stay! You're fun!:fluffle:

There are 5 birds on a fence. You shoot one. How many are left?


Easy, but I can't think of anything and I'm not arsed trying to fish out the Hobbit for riddles in the dark.

There are 5 birds on a fence. You shoot one. How many are left?


Easy, but I can't think of anything and I'm not arsed trying to fish out the Hobbit for riddles in the dark.
Either four or none.

No! Stay! You're fun!:fluffle:
But there's no Newsnight this evening. Kirsty Wark, why hast thou forsaken me?

There are 5 birds on a fence. You shoot one. How many are left?


Easy, but I can't think of anything and I'm not arsed trying to fish out the Hobbit for riddles in the dark.

5.

There are 5 birds on a fence. You shoot one. How many are left?


Easy, but I can't think of anything and I'm not arsed trying to fish out the Hobbit for riddles in the dark.
Well, if they're stupid enough to stay, then four. If not, none, because you frightened them off.

But there's no Newsnight this evening. Kirsty Wark, why hast thou forsaken me?
Wouldn't Newsnight have finished by now? And surely it's Newsnight Review on a Friday, or did they get rid of that? Or am I wrong about it being Friday...:confused:

Wouldn't Newsnight have finished by now? And surely it's Newsnight Review on a Friday, or did they get rid of that? Or am I wrong about it being Friday...:confused:

Yes, Newsnight Review by now. With sweet, sweet Kirsty. :fluffle:

Well, if they're stupid enough to stay, then four. If not, none, because you frightened them off.
Don't you think, even if just for the sake of consistency, you should've whited out 'none'?

Bastard, you edited...

Don't you think, even if just for the sake of consistency, you should've whited out 'none'?

Bastard, you edited...
:p

I'd normally proof read, but I wanted to be the first with the answer.

Still wasn't, though. :rolleyes:

Yes, Newsnight Review by now. With sweet, sweet Kirsty. :fluffle:
Whatever turns you on, I suppose. :rolleyes:

Whatever turns you on, I suppose. :rolleyes:
Don't you like educated Scottish women with interesting names?

No. I qualify to be (I scored an average of 145 on the tests, which is 10 points above the usual admission), but they only allow in the top 2% of the people who took the test in that 'round' of testing across the country.

One can qualify without even taking the tests, simply by providing evidence of an IQ score at or above the 98th percentile, professionally administered. You may have taken such a test in school or had it administered by a pychologist.

Incidentally, not all IQ tests agree. One may score a person at 134 while another would score the same person at 145. So perhaps the ketchup can be spared?

5.
Interesting interpretation.

Don't you like educated Scottish women with interesting names?
Wark has strange connotations for me. For a start, it's what seagulls say. Second, there was a guy called John Wark who played for Ipswich for fucking ages, and he had the stupidest moustache ever. But Kirsty's cool.

Interesting interpretation.

Well, shooting a bird doesn't cause it to stop existing and you didn't ask How many were left on the fence

One can qualify without even taking the tests, simply by providing evidence of an IQ score at or above the 98th percentile, professionally administered. You may have taken such a test in school or had it administered by a pychologist.
Not in the UK.

Incidentally, not all IQ tests agree. One may score a person at 134 while another would score the same person at 145. So perhaps the ketchup can be spared?
I know not all tests agree. That's why MENSA has two and takes an average.

There are 5 birds on a fence. You shoot one. How many are left?


Easy, but I can't think of anything and I'm not arsed trying to fish out the Hobbit for riddles in the dark.

I figured there'd be just the one, lying dead on the ground, since the other four surely fled when you killed their comrade.

I figured there'd be just the one, lying dead on the ground, since the other four surely fled when you killed their comrade.
They're communist birds now, are they?

They're communist birds now, are they?

Funny, you are Stalin, I am Comradeship. Both biased in some respect.

Funny, you are Stalin, I am Comradeship. Both biased in some respect.
I guess. Though my name has no bearing on my political views, nor the other way round. At school we had a running joke that Stalin was always happy in the propaganda posters because he was smoking weed in his pipe. Hence the name.

Actually, that was not funny.
I warned you about this gibberish.

Not in the UK.

How interesting. www.mensa.org.uk must have out-of-date information.

Although, strangely, since I brushed my teeth, I feel awake.

Although, strangely, since I brushed my teeth, I feel awake.

You must be using American brand toothpaste, to prevent the spread of communism!

How interesting. www.mensa.org.uk must have out-of-date information.
Or up-to-date information...

They're communist birds now, are they?

The best birds are...:cool:

Although, strangely, since I brushed my teeth, I feel awake.
Nah, that's commonly accepted practice. When drunk, clean your teeth, it makes you feel better. Well, I've always found that, as have my friends.

Actually, that was not funny.
I warned you about this gibberish.
I assume you're talking to yourself there...

This thread is getting a bit spammy. Before it gets moved, here's another riddle:

Solve this! (http://www.teachnet.ie/ddonnelly/images/instruments/fiddle4.jpg)

You must be using American brand toothpaste, to prevent the spread of communism!
Colgate Total Fresh Stripe. Some sort of clever pun...think child, think. Fighting tooth and... god, that's awful.

This thread is getting a bit spammy. Before it gets moved, here's another riddle:

Solve this! (http://www.teachnet.ie/ddonnelly/images/instruments/fiddle4.jpg)

Ha. I took far too long to get that.

can you post the answer? i'm feeling stupid.:rolleyes:

can you post the answer? i'm feeling stupid.:rolleyes:
You mean to the picture of the fiddle?

Erm...fiddle/riddle...

Never mind...

The picture was of a fiddle. It was riddle. I hope that's right :S.

Colgate Total Fresh Stripe. Some sort of clever pun...think child, think. Fighting tooth and... god, that's awful.
Isn't Colgate toothpaste red, white and blue?

Fiddling with our minds now, are you?

Isn't Colgate toothpaste red, white and blue?

No, that's the American flag. And our flag. I was going to insult it. Grr.

You mean to the picture of the fiddle?

Erm...fiddle/riddle...

Never mind...

well i thought so. was that a riddle? i'm very tired, i thought i was missing some cunning double meaning style of thing. meh.

Fiddling with our minds now, are you?
Considering other things I could be fiddling with, you should be glad it's your minds I chose...

Considering other things I could be fiddling with, you should be glad it's your minds I chose...
Explain. Tired. Dodgy innuendo?

Considering other things I could be fiddling with, you should be glad it's your minds I chose...

Now I am intrigued...:p

Explain. Tired. Dodgy innuendo?
Very dodgy.

Isn't Colgate toothpaste red, white and blue?

Nah, the American brand toothpaste/fighting commies was a play off a Monty Python thing.

This thread needs more riddles.

100S549A3100F4E621T0028Y2167
Easy, you'll get it.

100S549A3100F4E621T0028Y2167
Easy, you'll get it.
Got it.
Safety in numbers
That's a dingbat. Do they count? If so

Doctor
Doctor

And
History
Ditto
Ditto
Ditto

100S549A3100F4E621T0028Y2167
Easy, you'll get it.
Safety in numbers

Safety in numbers
*eats cookie in spite*
five hundred begins it, five hundred ends it, five in the middle is seen, the first of all letters, the first of all figures, take up their stations between, join them together and then you will bring before you the name of an eminent king

*eats cookie in spite*
five hundred begins it, five hundred ends it, five in the middle is seen, the first of all letters, the first of all figures, take up their stations between, join them together and then you will bring before you the name of an eminent king
David

David
Very alert this almost-morning.

Very alert this almost-morning.
I'd not heard that riddle before, actually. I impressed myself with the speed I did it.

I must admit, it would have been nice if you'd taken a couple more seconds. :)

Got it.
Safety in numbers
That's a dingbat. Do they count? If so



And

The second one is history repeats itself

Well, you deserve the cookie now.
http://www.cookiesinheaven.com/images/cookies/chocolate_chip_cookie.jpg

Anybody [EDIT]else[/ELSE] gonna have a stab at my dingbats?

I must admit, it would have been nice if you'd taken a couple more seconds. :)
Heh, sorry.

One for the new day:

Sir, I bear a rhyme excelling
In mystic force and magic spelling
Celestial sprites elucidate
All my own striving can't relate.

Qu'est-ce que c'est?

Anybody gonna have a stab at my dingbats?

Well I stabbed the second one. I've got a few similar ones myself.

Stand
I

Ban ana

Heh, sorry.

One for the new day:

Sir, I bear a rhyme excelling
In mystic force and magic spelling
Celestial sprites elucidate
All my own striving can't relate.

Qu'est-ce que c'est?

Abra Cadabra. I haven't a clue.
*Sellotapes eyelids open*

Anybody [EDIT]else[/ELSE] gonna have a stab at my dingbats?
Sorry...though I'd moved onto this page, and then you edited your post, so it's kinda your fault...:p

I got the history one (same answe as The Aeson got).

Dunno the other one.

Heh, sorry.

One for the new day:

Sir, I bear a rhyme excelling
In mystic force and magic spelling
Celestial sprites elucidate
All my own striving can't relate.

Qu'est-ce que c'est?

Curse my lack of french. Time to look for my babel fish.

Well I stabbed the second one. I've got a few similar ones myself.

Stand
I

Ban ana
Banana split

Fuck knows the other one.

I'll just go and ask him...

Sorry...though I'd moved onto this page, and then you edited your post, so it's kinda your fault...:p

I got the history one (same answe as The Aeson got).

Dunno the other one.

Ya ya, I know. That's why I drew attention to them. The history one has been solved so

Doctor
Doctor

Curse my lack of french. Time to look for my babel fish.
The French isn't part of the riddle. I added that myself. I just got bored of asking 'What is it?'

Well I stabbed the second one. I've got a few similar ones myself.

Stand
I

Ban ana

1:I undrestand
2:Banana split

Abra Cadabra. I haven't a clue.
*Sellotapes eyelids open*
And you doing early entry maths as well...

Yes, it's a maths related riddle.

Fine, I always use "how I wish I could recollect, of circle round, the exact relation archimede unwound." ah well

Fine, I always use "how I wish I could recollect, of circle round, the exact relation archimede unwound." ah well
Clever.
Here's your cookie back (http://www.cookiesinheaven.com/image...hip_cookie.jpg)

And you doing early entry maths as well...

Yes, it's a maths related riddle.

I've done early entry maths, two months into the course; I got A*. (only GCSE, of course) mwahahaha. Anyway, enough boasting of how education in this country is going to pot.

The French isn't part of the riddle. I added that myself. I just got bored of asking 'What is it?'
In that case Abracadabra?

Oh, well I look rather stupid don't I.

Doctor
Doctor
Out of curiosity, is this one some kind of joke...? :D

Non, ce n'est pas "abracadabra", je l'ai déjà dit, le page précédent.

In that case Abracadabra?
No...I'll be honest, you're unlikely to get it.

Try comparing the white text in CC's answer to the text of the riddle. See if you notice any similarities...

Out of curiosity, is this one some kind of joke...? :D
Nope.

Lord, try saying "abracadabra" in an outrageous French accent. It's nowon impossible.

It could be said to make the accent even more outrageous.

Non, ce n'est pas "abracadabra", je l'ai déjà dit, le page précédent.
Vous parlez français très bien. Faites-vous cela au GCSE aussi?

I only put that through babel fish to get the accents. Honest.

It could be said to make the accent even more outrageous.
[outrageous French accent]Muy Fronche acksonne eez werndafurl![/outrageous French accent]

Vous parlez français très bien. Faites-vous cela au GCSE aussi?

I only put that through babel fish to get the accents. Honest.

Vous pouvez tutoyer, s'il vous plaît. Pour les diacritiques, on peut utiliser «accent composer». J'hablive en Frangleterre, did vous pas savnow?

When you're finished speaking french, shall I post the answer to my dingbat?

Actually have to go now. :( Je reviendrai.

Vous pouvez tutoyer, s'il vous plaît. Pour les diacritiques, on peut utiliser «accent composer». J'hablive en Frangleterre, did vous pas savnow?
Eh? J'hablive? I don't know that one...

Je speak le Franglais tres good...

When you're finished speaking french, shall I post the answer to my dingbat?
Allez pour lui.

Erm, in case you don't know, that means go for it.

Actually have to go now. :( Je reviendrai.
Au revoir, mon ami.

Eh? J'hablive? I don't know that one...

Je speak le Franglais tres good...

J'hablive est a mot de my own invention.

Night night.

Allez pour lui.

Erm, in case you don't know, that means go for it.
Paradox
^^^^^^^

J'hablive est a mot de my own invention.
Ah. Ca would explain ce tout.

Paradox
^^^^^^^
Gah! Should've got that.

I was thinking it was double something, or something double...

I'm guessing you want the answer to mine as well?

Well, whether you do or don't, here it is....


Pi.

Well, whether you do or don't, here it is....


Pi.
Ya, I got it with CCs thing.

I'm gonna try and make another dingbat, if anyone is still gonna be here I'll post it

1) A man builds a rectangular house, with each wall having a southern exposure. He is very pleased with his house, and lives in it all year round. A bear comes wandering up to it. What colour is the bear?

2) A man passes a window and hears a telephone ring. A moment later, he dies. Why?

3) If two monkeys sit in the corner of a square room and look at another pair in the next corner and so on until every pair in a corner looks at another pair, how many monkeys could say they were looking at other monkeys?

4) If you drove a bus leaving Waterloo with 40 passengers and dropped off 7 and picked up 2 at the Aldwich, stopped at Holborn and picked up 10, went on to St Pauls and dropped 8 and picked up 5 there and arrived at Liverpool Street six minutes later, what would the drivers name be?


First to answer each gets a cookie! No Googling of answers!

Anyone got any more riddles?

Without looking at any posts past the first one, the bear would be white, the man dies because he hit the ground,
0 monkeys, because monkeys can't speak, and the the Driver's name, in my case, would be j9F6s.

http://i6.photobucket.com/albums/y239/NuGo1988/Dingbat.jpg

Sorry bout the shitiness of the pic, but I threw it together with paint

All right then. Good luck :).

Yeah, I got into mensa, but i left, because all the people there were arrogant b*stards.

here are a few more

Friend
Standing
Mis
Friend


Thorn
AAAAAA
AAAAAA
Thorn


OWHER


HIJKLMNO S
>>>>>>>>H
>>>>>>>>I
>>>>>>>>P

here are a few more

Friend
Standing
Mis
Friend


Thorn
AAAAAA
AAAAAA
Thorn


OWHER


HIJKLMNO S
>>>>>>>>H
>>>>>>>>I
>>>>>>>>P

Misunderstanding between friends?<<<

yup

I don't know the others though. :(

I don't know the others though. :(

keep thinking

Tall I am young.
Short I am old.
While with life I do glow,
Wind's breath is my foe
I believe what am I is implied
And if you get the reference: Se onr sverdar sitja hvass!
FIRE

No, candle!

something about "other"?

something about "other"?

nope, ur looking in the wrong direction

Hint: in OWHER there are two letters missing- and the word isnt COWHERD

Tall I am young.
Short I am old.
While with life I do glow,
Wind's breath is my foe
I believe what am I is implied
And if you get the reference: Se onr sverdar sitja hvass!


The reference:
May your swords stay sharp

what has that got to do with a candle

1. If you have two ducks in front of two ducks, two ducks behind two ducks, and two ducks in between two ducks, what is the least number of ducks you can have?

2. What room has neither doors, a floor, a ceiling, or windows?

3. A prominent business man lived in a penthouse apartment. Every morning took the elevator downstairs. He only worked till noon, then walked home. He always took the stairs up to his apartment. Why?
1 = SIX!!?

2 = MUSHROOM!

3 = Cos' you can't carry elevators upstairs, too heavy?!

1 = SIX!!?

2 = MUSHROOM!

3 = Cos' you can't carry elevators upstairs, too heavy?!

Ur answer to 3 is wrong, its because he is a midget, so he can press the ground floor button on the elevator, but he cant reach the top floor button

nope, ur looking in the wrong direction

Hint: in OWHER there are two letters missing- and the word isnt COWHERD

an unseedy coward, lol.

How many birthdays does the average man have?
1 ops, black writing! Silly me!

an unseedy coward, lol.

did i miss something there?

here are a few more

Thorn
AAAAAA
AAAAAA
Thorn

HIJKLMNO S
>>>>>>>>H
>>>>>>>>I
>>>>>>>>P
A rose between two thorns and Watership Down.

http://i6.photobucket.com/albums/y239/NuGo1988/Dingbat.jpg

Sorry bout the shitiness of the pic, but I threw it together with paint
Is that a washing machine in a toilet/bathroom?!

Erm...I'm going to guess throne room...:p

The reference:
May your swords stay sharp

what has that got to do with a candle
The riddle is from Eldest. Orik asks Saphira it when they're flying to Surda. But he says Urur's breath. I figured that would make it a bit too hard.

An
Sight

Is that a washing machine in a toilet/bathroom?!

Erm...I'm going to guess throne room...:p
Huh it is. I didn't notice.(It's obviously not my bathroom, I just googled toilet

Oh, and no.

An
Sight
>>>An oversight

On that note

siganht

I got one for you ^^:

Forests that don't grow
Rivers that don't flow
Towns without houses
And mountains without stones
What am I?

I got one for you ^^:

Forests that don't grow
Rivers that don't flow
Towns without houses
And mountains without stones
What am I?


you are a map or globe

1. It is impossible for each wall to have a southern exposure, and thus the color of the bear is irrelevant.

2. That was actually the sound of his pacemaker giving out.

3. Monkeys can't count.

4. My name, as I'm the driver, you oaf.

1. It is possible, it must be at the Pole.

3. Nor can they speak.

>>>An oversight

On that note

siganht

an insight

I got one for you ^^:

Forests that don't grow
Rivers that don't flow
Towns without houses
And mountains without stones
What am I?
A map

*snip the pic*
Sorry bout the shitiness of the pic, but I threw it together with paint

The only thing I could think of was King John?

The only thing I could think of was King John?

again, am i missing something?

Forward I'm heavy, backward I'm not. What am I?

My host thinks I'm an irritation, a bother, a pain. But he can't evict me, so here I will remain. Then one day I'm taken and ranked among my peers. Can you guess just what I am? Then you might call me dear.

What 5 letters can be re-arranged to form 4 words that can be used in the spaces in the following sentence, to make it make sense?
The farmer with hundreds of _ _ _ _ _ , deeply _ _ _ _ _ about the amount of rainfall, and _ _ _ _ _ around with artificial watering systems when the ground is dry enough to _ _ _ _ _ him about the possibility of crop failure.

Forward I'm heavy, backward I'm not. What am I?

My host thinks I'm an irritation, a bother, a pain. But he can't evict me, so here I will remain. Then one day I'm taken and ranked among my peers. Can you guess just what I am? Then you might call me dear.

What 5 letters can be re-arranged to form 4 words that can be used in the spaces in the following sentence, to make it make sense?
The farmer with hundreds of _ _ _ _ _ , deeply _ _ _ _ _ about the amount of rainfall, and _ _ _ _ _ around with artificial watering systems when the ground is dry enough to _ _ _ _ _ him about the possibility of crop failure.

1)dunno
2)a baby?
3)a c e r s

Sorry, I've googled the first one. :( *is ashamed*

1)dunno
2)a baby?
3)a c e r s
What are you thinking with the second one? The riddle refers to the host as 'he'! :p

Erm...yeah, that second one's wrong, though you got #3.

Sorry, I've googled the first one. :( *is ashamed*
Don't worry. We all have moments of weakness.

And I was wrong about the second one. :(

Thar ye are

Forward I'm heavy, backward I'm not. What am I?

My host thinks I'm an irritation, a bother, a pain. But he can't evict me, so here I will remain. Then one day I'm taken and ranked among my peers. Can you guess just what I am? Then you might call me dear.

What 5 letters can be re-arranged to form 4 words that can be used in the spaces in the following sentence, to make it make sense?
The farmer with hundreds of _ _ _ _ _ , deeply _ _ _ _ _ about the amount of rainfall, and _ _ _ _ _ around with artificial watering systems when the ground is dry enough to _ _ _ _ _ him about the possibility of crop failure.

1. Ton And I didn't google it. :p

1. Ton And I didn't google it. :p

You just looked at my answer. :p

Erm, I didn't post the answer.

You just looked at my answer. :p

Nope. Didn't even see that you've posted your answer. So there.

Erm, I didn't post the answer.
LOL! Awwww.

@ Aeson: Yup. Now get t'other two.

Nope. Haven't the foggiest. Wait, is the second one a germ? No idea why that would be ranked among it's peers but whatever.

Nope. Haven't the foggiest. Wait, is the second one a germ? No idea why that would be ranked among it's peers but whatever.

I thought the 5 letter thing was really obvious. I didn't even think about it. Odd that you got ton.

Nope. Haven't the foggiest. Wait, is the second one a germ? No idea why that would be ranked among it's peers but whatever.
No. Not a bad guess, I suppose, although what with it being wrong, I suppose it is. Ah, well.

noone has got my dingbat yet

OWHER

if youre stuck, hers an easier one meaning practically the same thing

NOWBEINGHERE

noone has got my dingbat yet

OWHER


Middle of Nowhere

Middle of Nowhere
That's the one!!!

That's the one!!!

wahey

just came up with this one (not that i came up with the others)

gninnur running

Running backwards and forwards.

just came up with this one (not that i came up with the others)

gninnur running

Running back and forth

Running back and forth
:rolleyes: Only 9 minutes late...

:rolleyes: Only 9 minutes late...

...Ey wait a minute....

Ifreann looky what I found for you: http://www.xtremeservers.co.uk/forum/images/smilies/nooo.gif

Ifreann looky what I found for you: http://www.xtremeservers.co.uk/forum/images/smilies/nooo.gif

don't let the thread die

more dingbats

cy cy

1 1 1 1
2:30

DEORR

milonelion

JUSGROSSTICE

more dingbats

cy cy

1 1 1 1
2:30

DEORR

milonelion

JUSGROSSTICE

one in a millon

a gross miscarriage of justice?

DEORR = out of order

one in a millon

a gross miscarriage of justice?

second one not quite

JUSGROSSTICE = gross injustice

cy cy = to see why?

1 1 1 1
2:30
= For once upon a time

cy cy = to see why?
it could be, but its not

1 1 1 1
2:30
= For once upon a time

yeah, or just once upon a time

Great! My grandad is real picky about those though, so I though I'd at the for.

ok here's a easy one.

A man left on vacation on Monday but 4 days later he rides back on Wednesday.

How?

ok here's a easy one.

A man left on vacation on Monday but 4 days later he rides back on Wednesday.

How?

his horse is called monday/wednesday

JUSGROSSTICE = gross injusticePfft that was too easy. I saw that straight away.

Pfft that was too easy. I saw that straight away.

So did I, almost. :)

Pfft that was too easy. I saw that straight away.

yeah, that one was easy, now try

cy cy

yeah, that one was easy, now try

cy cyAck, I couldn't figure it out, but when I checked the answer I found that I'd thought of the answer, but didn't realise it made sense.

I managed to get 'size' out of it though. spoiler -> Two cy -> cy's which if you pronounce cy as 'sigh' then it becomes 'sighs' which sounds like 'size'. Thought that obviously isn't a phrase on its own.

What English word can have 4 of its 5 letters removed and still retain its original pronunciation? Queue -> Q

Found this on the internet. Easy, but nice.

Ack, I couldn't figure it out, but when I checked the answer I found that I'd thought of the answer, but didn't realise it made sense.

I managed to get 'size' out of it though. spoiler -> Two cy -> cy's which if you pronounce cy as 'sigh' then it becomes 'sighs' which sounds like 'size'. Thought that obviously isn't a phrase on its own.

How did you check the answer? :S

What English word can have 4 of its 5 letters removed and still retain its original pronunciation? Queue -> Q

Found this on the internet. Easy, but nice.

The word is queue
i am good at the easy ones. :cool:

Nope, it is possible.

They've all been solved already. :(

Need some more.

How far can a dog run into a wood?
Half way

Half way
You're 27 pages late.

How many apples can a Frenchman eat on an empty stomach?

One bite, then it isn't empty anymore. But that's too simple, aint it? So, none, because they don't eat apples, they eat (insert french word for apple here).

Nobody got my picture one yet http://i6.photobucket.com/albums/y239/NuGo1988/Dingbat.jpg

One bite, then it isn't empty anymore. But that's too simple, aint it? So, none, because they don't eat apples, they eat (insert french word for apple here).

that would be pomme

How did you check the answer? :SOh... I didn't read the whole thread. I thought it was your riddle and you put the answer in white text. Haha... :(

I just did a google for the answer. It's a good riddle.

How many apples can a Frenchman eat on an empty stomach?


None, because as soon as he eats one, his stomach isn't empty anymore.

1) A man builds a rectangular house, with each wall having a southern exposure. He is very pleased with his house, and lives in it all year round. A bear comes wandering up to it. What colour is the bear?

2) A man passes a window and hears a telephone ring. A moment later, he dies. Why?

3) If two monkeys sit in the corner of a square room and look at another pair in the next corner and so on until every pair in a corner looks at another pair, how many monkeys could say they were looking at other monkeys?

4) If you drove a bus leaving Waterloo with 40 passengers and dropped off 7 and picked up 2 at the Aldwich, stopped at Holborn and picked up 10, went on to St Pauls and dropped 8 and picked up 5 there and arrived at Liverpool Street six minutes later, what would the drivers name be?


First to answer each gets a cookie! No Googling of answers!

Anyone got any more riddles?
Having read your questions it is obvious only one man on this earth could answer them correctly.... Chuck Norris.

Oh... I didn't read the whole thread. I thought it was your riddle and you put the answer in white text. Haha... :(

I just did a google for the answer. It's a good riddle.

Yes, it's really...tempestuous. ;)

None, because as soon as he eats one, his stomach isn't empty anymore.

White your answers or you'll ruin it for everyone. Use [XCOLOR="White][/COLORX] but without the Xs

Three questions from literature.

"What have I got in my pocket?"
"What is the answer to the question of life, the universe, and everything?"
"What is the question of life, the universe, and everything?"

Yes, it's really...tempestuous. ;)Oh shush :p

How's about this one. It's fairly easy as well. Very good for ego. This is a one 'What am I?' riddle.

Catherine the Great had 9 tales to tell,
If the tin roof is hot, she'll offer a yell.
Her brother is Tom, and her sister's Siamese,
She looks great in her boots, eating eaters of cheese.

What I don't get is how Catherine the Great fits into the riddle.

A cat <-- OMG Answer!

Three questions from literature.

"What have I got in my pocket?"
"What is the answer to the question of life, the universe, and everything?"
"What is the question of life, the universe, and everything?"
String or nothing ;)

Three questions from literature.

"What have I got in my pocket?"
"What is the answer to the question of life, the universe, and everything?"
"What is the question of life, the universe, and everything?"
1) My preciousssss
2) 42
3) I'm afraid I can't tell you that, or the universe would be destroyed and replaced by something even crazier...again.

Oh shush :p

How's about this one. It's fairly easy as well. Very good for ego.

Catherine the Great had 9 tales to tell,
If the tin roof is hot, she'll offer a yell.
Her brother is Tom, and her sister's Siamese,
She looks great in her boots, eating eaters of cheese.

What I don't get is how Catherine the Great fits into the riddle.

A cat <-- OMG Answer!
Woot, got it. Since I'm posting I'm gonna once again say that nobody got my picture dingbat http://i6.photobucket.com/albums/y239/NuGo1988/Dingbat.jpg

Oh shush :p

How's about this one. It's fairly easy as well. Very good for ego.

Catherine the Great had 9 tales to tell,
If the tin roof is hot, she'll offer a yell.
Her brother is Tom, and her sister's Siamese,
She looks great in her boots, eating eaters of cheese.

What I don't get is how Catherine the Great fits into the riddle.

A cat <-- OMG Answer!

Umm...I get it...but where's the question?

Umm...I get it...but where's the question?
I think who.what is Catherine the Great is the implied question.

Three questions from literature.

"What have I got in my pocket?"
"What is the answer to the question of life, the universe, and everything?"
"What is the question of life, the universe, and everything?"My anwsers
Uh... uh... a towel? No.. a toothbrush... a book? I can't rememeber :(
42 :P
Crap. I can't remember this one either. It's a multiplication that doesn't equal 42 as I remember.

Woot, got it. Since I'm posting I'm gonna once again say that nobody got my picture dingbat http://i6.photobucket.com/albums/y239/NuGo1988/Dingbat.jpg
To be honnest I have absolutely no idea. but... Something to do with the toilet being the great equaliser?

4) If you drove a bus leaving Waterloo with 40 passengers and dropped off 7 and picked up 2 at the Aldwich, stopped at Holborn and picked up 10, went on to St Pauls and dropped 8 and picked up 5 there and arrived at Liverpool Street six minutes later, what would the drivers name be?




Sounds like the one my history teacher always tells us.


If a plane went down on the border of the US and Canada, where would they bury the survivors?

Umm...I get it...but where's the question?Fixed. I edited the post. And it's a 'What am I?' riddle.

If a plane went down on the border of the US and Canada, where would they bury the survivors?
Already done. They wouldn't.

My anwsers
Uh... uh... a towel? No.. a toothbrush... a book? I can't rememeber :(
42 :P
Crap. I can't remember this one either. It's a multiplication that doesn't equal 42 as I remember.
Yeah, it's What do you get if you multiply six by nine?.

Hello again everyone.

cy cy

OMG THE ANSWER ISSS!!!!

cyclones

Yeah, it's What do you get if you multiply six by nine?.

Hello again everyone.Is it coincidental that 6*9=42 in base 13? :eek:

Woot, got it. Since I'm posting I'm gonna once again say that nobody got my picture dingbat http://i6.photobucket.com/albums/y239/NuGo1988/Dingbat.jpg
Royal Flush

Royal Flush

Well, so it is!

Is it coincidental that 6*9=42 in base 13? :eek:
Yes. At a guess.

Here's a great maths joke:

Why do mathematicians get Hallowe'en and Christmas confused?

Because Oct 31 = Dec 25.

LOL! :p

To be honnest I have absolutely no idea. but... Something to do with the toilet being the great equaliser?

Not the answer, but that depends on the quality of your toilet.

Royal Flush
Hooray for you, here is your legendary pink cookie. (http://www.supereggplant.com/archives/pink%20cookie.JPG)

Yes. At a guess.

Here's a great maths joke:

Why do mathematicians get Hallowe'en and Christmas confused?

Because Oct 31 = Dec 25.

LOL! :p

I don't get it :(

Hooray for you, here is your legendary pink cookie. (http://www.supereggplant.com/archives/pink%20cookie.JPG)
Why would anyone take a photo of that and post it on the net? That's just fucking weird...

I don't get it :(
31 in base 8 is 25 in base 10.

So oct 31 = dec 25.

I don't get it :(
Silly child. :p

Silly child. :p
Early entry maths boy. ;)

Early entry maths boy. ;)
I wish people at school would call me that. :(

Silly child. :p
I had no idea either what the joke meant at first.

I still have no idea what the joke means after the explanation. :p

31 in base 8 is 25 in base 10.

So oct 31 = dec 25.

I have only the vaguest of ideas what base 8 math is.

I had no idea either what the joke meant at first.

I still have no idea what the joke means after the explanation. :p

Go to Start>programs>accessories>calculator>view>scientific

Enter 25, then click on oct, at the top left.

Go to Start>programs>accessories>calculator>view>scientific

Enter 25, then click on oct, at the top left.
Ah.

I'm afraid maths never held my attention as something interesting to do, so I dropped it at the earliest opportunity. I can add up, and I know my times tables, so I know as much as I'll ever need to. :p

I have only the vaguest of ideas what base 8 math is.
It's where you use 8 as the base, rather than 10. So whereas in base 10 you'd count like this:
1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12...etc.

In base 8, you'd count like this:
1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 11, 12, 13, 14...etc.

Ah.

I'm afraid maths never held my attention as something interesting to do, so I dropped it at the earliest opportunity. I can add up, and I know my times tables, so I know as much as I'll ever need to. :p
Ya, when is base anythng but 10 math going to be useful for anyone?

It's where you use 8 as the base, rather than 10. So whereas in base 10 you'd count like this:
1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12...etc.

In base 8, you'd count like this:
1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 11, 12, 13, 14...etc.

No you'd count 0, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 10, 11, 12...etc ;)

Ya, when is base anythng but 10 math going to be useful for anyone?
Telling the time, I think.

It's where you use 8 as the base, rather than 10. So whereas in base 10 you'd count like this:
1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12...etc.

In base 8, you'd count like this:
1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 11, 12, 13, 14...etc.
Yes that's the limit of my understanding.

No you'd count 0, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 10, 11, 12...etc ;)
Oh, be quiet, you. I thought I might have it wrong, actually. Meh. Thank you.

http://www.google.co.uk/search?hl=en&q=25+in+base+8&meta= also.

http://www.google.co.uk/search?hl=en&q=25+in+base+8&meta= also.
You can do that in Google? Wow...

Anyway...back on topic.

You are walking through a field, and you find something to eat. It doesn't have bones, and it doesn't have meat. You pick it up and put it into your pocket. You take it home and put it on a shelf, but 3 day's later it walks away. What is it?

You can do that in Google? Wow...

Anyway...back on topic.

You are walking through a field, and you find something to eat. It doesn't have bones, and it doesn't have meat. You pick it up and put it into your pocket. You take it home and put it on a shelf, but 3 day's later it walks away. What is it?

You can do everything in google :).

http://www.google.co.uk/search?hl=en&q=25+pounds+in+dollars&meta=

http://www.google.co.uk/search?hl=en&q=25+UK+gallons+in+gallons&meta=

http://www.google.co.uk/search?hl=en&q=25+kg+in+pounds&meta=

Anyway, topic. A chrysalis?

You can do everything in google :).

http://www.google.co.uk/search?hl=en&q=25+pounds+in+dollars&meta=

http://www.google.co.uk/search?hl=en&q=25+UK+gallons+in+gallons&meta=

http://www.google.co.uk/search?hl=en&q=25+kg+in+pounds&meta=

Anyway, topic. A chrysalis?
Wow, wow, and wow. Personally, I use my head to work out shit like that.

And no. Why would you eat one of those?

Bah, too quick.

If you were alone in a deserted house in the dark and there was a lamp, firewood and a candle and you only had one match - which would you light first?

Answers in white text this time!
If you're in the house, it's no longer deserted, is it?

Why would anyone take a photo of that and post it on the net? That's just fucking weird...
STFU ABOUT MY COOKIE!1!!11!OMGELEVENTY!1!1SHIFTSHIFT:sniper: :sniper: !!1!OMGLOLZ:D

STFU ABOUT MY COOKIE!1!!11!OMGELEVENTY!1!1SHIFTSHIFT:sniper: :sniper: !!1!OMGLOLZ:D
Yes...I'll be...over there...

Wow, wow, and wow. Personally, I use my head to work out shit like that.

And no. Why would you eat one of those?

Personally, I don't know the conversion rates for anything except, centigrade<->Fahrenheit, inches<->centimetres and miles<->kilometres.

Such is the standard of our education system.

Yes...I'll be...over there...
That's a tough riddle:(

Personally, I don't know the conversion rates for anything except, centigrade<->Fahrenheit, inches<->centimetres and miles<->kilometres.

Such is the standard of our education system.
Interesting. I learnt most conversion systems from my maths teacher...

Interesting. I learnt most conversion systems from my maths teacher...
Well, I've spent more than half my life under Blair. Enough said. Guess how my father votes. :D

Well, I've spent more than half my life under Blair. Enough said. Guess how my father votes. :D
You poor sod. I've lived more than half my life under a Conservative government. Though if the next election is after Feb. 2009, I won't be able to say that.

Is this a riddle? I'll go with Tory.

You poor sod. I've lived more than half my life under a Conservative government. Though if the next election is after Feb. 2009, I won't be able to say that.

Is this a riddle? I'll go with Tory.

Yes you will...considering our friend eminent king riddle Cameron.
Well done. 4th turkish delight for you.

You have to get a fox, a rabbit, and a lettuce to the other side of a river, but you can only fit one of them in the boat with you at the same time. You can't leave the fox and rabbit together because the fox will eat the rabbit, and you can't leave the rabbit and lettuce together because the rabbit will eat the lettuce. What is the fewest number of trips across the river you can make to get everything from one side of the river to the other? And what are they?

Edit: Here's the answer for those who can't be bothered to work it out:
Trip 1: Take the rabbit across.
Trip 2: Take the lettuce across, bring the rabbit back
Trip 3: Take the fox across
Trip 4: Take the rabbit across
Then sink the boat so any sod after you has to swim
What kind of fucked up boats are we talking about here? Jeez! I'm not getting into ANY watercraft that couldn't carry both a rabbit and a lettuce head. Damn, some riddles are stupid.

What kind of fucked up boats are we talking about here? Jeez! I'm not getting into ANY watercraft that couldn't carry both a rabbit and a lettuce head. Damn, some riddles are stupid.
:p Read the rest of the thread on that. We came to the conclusion that it was a fox cub, a massive rabbit, and the person in question was rather weighty.

Well, if it's held on the 1st February, and our friend Dave wins, then by 15th May you will have again spent half your life under the Tories. (by my poorly executed calculations)

Yes you will...considering our friend eminent king riddle Cameron.
Well done. 4th turkish delight for you.
Woo! Dutch erotica, here I come! ;)

*off to the stairwell*

Woo! Dutch erotica, here I come! ;)

*off to the stairwell*
How did you know it was Dutch, without clicking on it? :p

Well, if it's held on the 1st February, and our friend Dave wins, then by 15th May you will have again spent half your life under the Tories. (by my poorly executed calculations)
I make it that I will have lived exactly half my life under the Tories and half under Labour on the 19th of January 2009. I could be wrong.

You can do that in Google? Wow...

Anyway...back on topic.

You are walking through a field, and you find something to eat. It doesn't have bones, and it doesn't have meat. You pick it up and put it into your pocket. You take it home and put it on a shelf, but 3 day's later it walks away. What is it?

A truffle/morel with a bunch of ants in it?

Edit: Can someone think of a fungus or plant that moves on its own? (If the answer to the riddle is a part of Kingdom Animalia, then the riddle is very poorly phrased, seeing as all animals other than sponges have meat/flesh.)

A truffle/morel with a bunch of ants in it?
Eh, no.

How did you know it was Dutch, without clicking on it? :p
Erm...I have Google's web accelerator, and can see the pages it pre-loads with a mysterious 7th sense. I call it my porn sense.

I make it that I will have lived exactly half my life under the Tories and half under Labour on the 19th of January 2009. I could be wrong.
I just went on http://www.timeanddate.com/date/dateadd.html and messed about. I said the calculations were poorly executed. We're working with May 2 as the changeover yes?

I just went on http://www.timeanddate.com/date/dateadd.html and messed about. I said the calculations were poorly executed. We're working with May 2 as the changeover yes?
I was going with May 1st, because that was the election date. Technically, there's nobody actually ruling the country on election day, because the whole government is dissolved. If it's May 2nd, then...erm...it'd be January 21st 2009.

Edit: Can someone think of a fungus or plant that moves on its own? (If the answer to the riddle is a part of Kingdom Animalia, then the riddle is very poorly phrased, seeing as all animals other than sponges have meat/flesh.)
All riddles are poorly phrased by their very nature. I'm not sure if it comes under Kingdom Animalia or not actually...I think technically, it is, but you wouldn't think of it as such...

I was going with May 1st, because that was the election date. Technically, there's nobody actually ruling the country on election day, because the whole government is dissolved. If it's May 2nd, then...erm...it'd be January 21st 2009.

Yeah, it's all too complicated. (to bother working it out)

Wow, wow, and wow. Personally, I use my head to work out shit like that.

And no. Why would you eat one of those?Have you never heard of Google Calculator. It is your god. :p
http://www.google.co.uk/help/calculator.html

You can do that in Google? Wow...

Anyway...back on topic.

You are walking through a field, and you find something to eat. It doesn't have bones, and it doesn't have meat. You pick it up and put it into your pocket. You take it home and put it on a shelf, but 3 day's later it walks away. What is it?

I think I picked up an egg if not I have no clue

Have you never heard of Google Calculator. It is your god. :p
http://www.google.co.uk/help/calculator.html
I have no god...

Yes, that's right, I'm part of the godless atheistic heathen scum conspiracy to take over teh interweb!

Maddogg']I think I picked up an egg if not I have no clue
You did indeed. Congratulations. You win this:

http://www.tallstories.org.uk/shows/other/the-egg.jpg

Have you never heard of Google Calculator. It is your god. :p
http://www.google.co.uk/help/calculator.html

We were talking about that!

You did indeed. Congratulations. You win this:

http://www.tallstories.org.uk/shows/other/the-egg.jpg

They spelt œuf wrong. :p

They spelt œuf wrong. :p
They also appear to be complete morons, considering the French reads 'This is not an egg'.

You did indeed. Congratulations. You win this:

http://www.tallstories.org.uk/shows/other/the-egg.jpg

You do realize that eggs have bones... right? [/big_nitpick]