NationStates Jolt Archive


Outsourcing has hit a new low...

Syniks
19-04-2006, 17:46
Please Enjoy This Humorous Blogging of a Topical Nature
Shecky Naharajan
Iowahawk Guest Blogger


Hello, all readers of the humorous Iowahawk blog! Permit me please to introduce myself, I am Shecky Naharajan. In an effort to better serve you, the topical humor customer, and to contain ever-increasing blogging costs, Mister David Burge has retained the services of my firm, Risibility Outsourcing Systems Ltd. of Bangalore. With a staff of over 18,000 skilled japery craftsmen working in modern plants from Delhi to Goa, ROS is the subcontinent's leader in low cost, high productivity zaniness. So let us without further delay begin the current events levity!

Say every one, have you read the recent headlines pertaining to the Iranian government and the efforts by which it has endeavored to acquire nuclear weaponry? I am talking about your "fission expedition" !

And let us not neglect to mention Representative Cynthia McKinney whose new hairstyle caused her to become unrecognized by security forces, which in turn caused a humorous situation in which there were heated words and even the outrageous throwing of cell phones! This is what I must call a "hairy situation" !

Now, imagine if you will the following satirical conversation taking place between United States President George Bush and the deposed Iraqi Saddam Hussein:

Saddam Hussein: Let me out of this jail, you scalawag!

George Bush: I cannot do it, I tell you!

Saddam Hussein: And why not?!

George Bush: Rooty toot toot, for I am an American cowboy and it is our custom to pen such wild animals as yourself!

Saddam Hussein: Grrr! I am assuredly vexed!

Turning now to the world of popular entertainment celebrities, have you kind reader heard of Akshay Kumar's unfortunate injury whilst filming a cola advert in Mumbai? I have heard that many thousands of starstruck girls quickly rushed to the scene in hopes of providing him with mouth-to-mouth rescucitation, in spite of the fact that his injury was merely a slight burn from the exhaust on his stylish Bajaj motorbike!

Also consider in the current world of sports, Rahul Dravid and his skillful batsmanship in leading India to a 4-0 win versus England on the cricket pitch! If I may say he has left the beleaguered English side quite "batty" with madness!

Next let us consider the extremely humorous situation in the capital of Washington. Just yesterday...

¡BROMAS HILARANTE AHORA!

por Jesus Lopez, Emilio Ortiz, Gonsalvo Almodovar y Hector Rodriguez
Iowahawk trabajadors del humor de la huésped

¡Ai yi yi! ¡Boinnnnnggggg! ¡Ha ha ha!

Please be waiting just one minute! Can you people not see I am humor blogging here?

¿Es éste el Iowahawk blog?

I cannot concentrate on my comedic timing while you are making such noisesomeness! Should you not desist, I will... wait, I know who you are. Indeed I am quite certain! You are those men who linger about the 'day blogger station' in front of HomeDepot.com!

No habla ingles, Senor.

By the trunk of Ganesh! How can you expect to perform quality jokery without a command of simple English?

¡Thphhthppffitthtphpt! ¡Ai chihuahua! Muchos refritos también!

No, no, no, no. I was specifically told there were to be no jokes of a farting nature. How much is that bastard Burge paying you?

¡Gringo paga cincuenta centavos por broma!

Fifty cents per joke? I can't compete with that! I am still paying my student loan at Madras Institute of Lampoonery!

¿donde está la Western Union?

提出了圆眼睛! 教育部的人都笑了'!

¡Carumba! ¡Es el chino loco!

Ho no. There goes the neighborhood.


http://iowahawk.typepad.com/iowahawk/2006/04/please_enjoy_th.html
Formidability
19-04-2006, 17:52
Was all that really neccesary?..........and your point is?
Drunk commies deleted
19-04-2006, 17:56
Boardmember: Hey Bill, I've been meaning to talk to you about something.

CEO: What is it Al?

Boardmember: Well Bill, the board has been really pleased with the work you've done to make us more profitable. That outsourcing and those layoffs have really paid off. In the spirit of these new changes, well, we've found a guy name Tran in Vietnam who can do your job for less than a tenth of the pay. Sorry Bill, you're just not valuable enough to the comany to keep you on.
Syniks
19-04-2006, 17:57
Was all that really neccesary?..........and your point is?
Humor? Obviously somthing of which you are unacquainted. :rolleyes: