NationStates Jolt Archive

Poll coming.

Beer bottles are confusing and evil. They have these caps that are hard to take off. Naturally a variety of methods have grown up to address this problem and they include 'bottle openers', the nearest windowsill and your teeth. So how do you open yours? NS - more specifically me - wants to know.

(Personally, always wif the teeth)

Poll coming.

Beer bottles are confusing and evil. They have these caps that are hard to take off. Naturally a variety of methods have grown up to address this problem and they include 'bottle openers', the nearest windowsill and your teeth. So how do you open yours? NS - more specifically me - wants to know.

(Personally, always wif the teeth)

The quickest way available. Bottle opener around? great. There's always smashing the end against something, knifes, teeth when desperate, gloves + pulling, and the very desperate, shattering the top part of the bottle(just enough so the cap is off ^_^)

The quickest way available. Bottle opener around? great. There's always smashing the end against something, knifes, teeth when desperate, gloves + pulling, and the very desperate, shattering the top part of the bottle(just enough so the cap is off ^_^)

I'm always scared to smash the bottle myself, owing to an urban legend I heard about 'glassy bits' when I was a kid.

I therefore go with the teeth,

You can use the bump underneath the bottle cap of your next bottle (or a previous empty) to open them.

I don't. I don't drink alcohol, it's bad for your health.

I'm always scared to smash the bottle myself, owing to an urban legend I heard about 'glassy bits' when I was a kid.

I therefore go with the teeth,

I think I'd rather take the chance of a tiny piece of glass going down, and getting evaporated in my stomach, rather than doing that kind of damage to my teeth.

Butter knife is my prefered, other than bottle opener. But I rarely have one of those around.

A Bic lighter, properly applied, works as well as any bottle-opener. *wisenod*

Never use your teeth again! :p

I used to use my teeth...Never again. (ouch)

Meat axe is great. But only if you have "audience". Bottle opener when there's noone to impress ;)

Real men buy twist-offs. When you are shit-faced, you do not want to be applying force to a piece of glass with a pointed object. You know you are going to get hurt anyways, why increase the frequency?

Real men buy twist-offs. When you are shit-faced, you do not want to be applying force to a piece of glass with a pointed object. You know you are going to get hurt anyways, why increase the frequency?

I'm shit faced now. And I am continuing to open my stella wif my teef.

A Bic lighter, properly applied, works as well as any bottle-opener. *wisenod*

Never use your teeth again! :p


what he said

wif my teef.
You can tell

You can tell

Bah, real men don't need teef.

I'm shit faced now. And I am continuing to open my stella wif my teef.
Because you are not shit faced by man standards?

With my eyes - i have a knack for it

Poll coming.

Beer bottles are confusing and evil. They have these caps that are hard to take off. Naturally a variety of methods have grown up to address this problem and they include 'bottle openers', the nearest windowsill and your teeth. So how do you open yours? NS - more specifically me - wants to know.

(Personally, always wif the teeth)

i just whack em on the edge of something..but i have had alot of practice...lol

Because you are not shit faced by man standards?

I can only try. Zut &c.

With another bottle or a bic. Failing that any hard edge.

Open? I drink form a bag. God I love goon.

I don't. I don't drink alcohol, it's bad for your health.

:eek:


Not even a tiny bit of wine?

Red wine is small portions is good for you, along with some types of ale.


Stuff like Aftershock on the other hand...ergh.

I don't have a beer

:)

I open my beer by walking into a pub; sitting down at the bar; saying "Pint of Black Sheep please" and waiting for it to arrive :D

That's the REAL way to drink beer. None of this funny bottles of lager business.

my prefered choice is you go for cans of beer not bottles... it makes public drinking so much easier

I open my beer by walking into a pub; sitting down at the bar; saying "Pint of Black Sheep please" and waiting for it to arrive :D

That's the REAL way to drink beer. None of this funny bottles of lager business.

Newkie Brown comes in bottles...and that a very nice drink indeed, although Black Sheep is rather tasty, even more so as Riggwelter or Golden Sheep.

How do you open your beer?

I walk to my tap and turn it.

Bottles I open with my imitation leatherman.

I rub the glass, it wears down over time.

With my eyes - i have a knack for it
:p

Don't drink beer. And would *never* use my teeth, either. *shudder*

Beer only tastes good to me when I'm drunk, in which case I usually have to have someone else open it for me...:D

I always have at least 2 bottle openers because I usually need them all the time

Like any good wife-beater i get my woman to do it for me.

I always have at least 2 bottle openers because I usually need them all the time

The membership card to most of the clubs at my uni are bottle openers, so I'd say I'd have 4-5 on my keyring at any one time. Funny thing is I always use the same one, even though I don't belong to that club anymore.

What about using a Cigerette Lighter?

Poll coming.

Beer bottles are confusing and evil. They have these caps that are hard to take off. Naturally a variety of methods have grown up to address this problem and they include 'bottle openers', the nearest windowsill and your teeth. So how do you open yours? NS - more specifically me - wants to know.
Uh ... if it's twist off, I ... well, twist it off! Duh!

If it's non-twist-off, I usually carry a universal tool on my belt and use the bottle-opener. If I don't have my universal tool with me, I generally use the Drill Instructor Voice of Doom ... the cap just jumps off the bottle out of sheer terror. :D

Beer in a can.:fluffle:

I open my beer by walking into a pub; sitting down at the bar; saying "Pint of Black Sheep please" and waiting for it to arrive :D

That's the REAL way to drink beer. None of this funny bottles of lager business.

Hear Hear! Anyone who's tried to drink Guinness from a can will know why... Although bottles are a tad better. Erdinger Weissbier Dunkel is very nice too.

with my fingers...but if its hard, you use a bit of shirt to grip it better
once, i sliced my skin just below my thumb trying to open a vb.
it hurt and it bled
stupid bottle tops

If it's non-twist-off, I usually carry a universal tool on my belt and use the bottle-opener. If I don't have my universal tool with me, I generally use the Drill Instructor Voice of Doom ... the cap just jumps off the bottle out of sheer terror. :D

Ah, the Chuck Norris method.

I generally use a leatherman or whatever of my multitools I happen to find first. Then I pour it into my 0.5L Erdinger Weissbrau glass that was somehow in my room when I woke up after a night at the bar in Germany.

*Waits for someone to say ring-piece.*:eek:

I don't. I don't drink alcohol, it's bad for your health.

You are flying in the face of accepted medical science: taken in moderation it is actually good for you.

You are flying in the face of accepted medical science: taken in moderation it is actually good for you.
Well, some scientists are now saying it's bad for you again... They really have trouble making up their minds. Personally I say to hell with the scientists, I like it and it's not making me dead or sick (apart from rarely - when I have a few shots of spirits on a non-drunk stomach, though I can drink tequila fine, strangely).

Teeth is a bad idea. I tried it once or twice and ground bits off my teeth. I like bottle openers, they are teh easy.

with anus, of course

Teeth is a bad idea. I tried it once or twice and ground bits off my teeth. I like bottle openers, they are teh easy.

What I want to know is why the phrase 'bottle opener' is inverted commas in the poll. Is this some kind of codeword for something really dirty?

Anyone else ever used window sill/table and had the wood give way rather than the top? In the distant past when I was a student I always carried a Swiss army knive type thing with a corkscrew and can bottle opener, a real life saver at times.

With great satisfaction.

:D

Armpits.

:p

Poll coming.

Beer bottles are confusing and evil. They have these caps that are hard to take off. Naturally a variety of methods have grown up to address this problem and they include 'bottle openers', the nearest windowsill and your teeth. So how do you open yours? NS - more specifically me - wants to know.

(Personally, always wif the teeth)
I don't think bottles are confusing or evil, but she'd better have it open when she brings it to me. (J/K, sweetie.)

mostly a bottle opener, but is there is none, anything I can find, if there is no suitable object: teeth, it works pretty well once you get the hang of it.

NOTE: allways let someone explain it to you first and NEVER try it while drunk.

Most of the time I'm drinking what's on tap anyway.

But if I'm stuck with bottles, and they aren't twist-off, I'll find a bottle-opener or the nearest show-off who can pop it open in his own creative way.

I don't think bottles are confusing or evil, but she'd better have it open when she brings it to me. (J/K, sweetie.)
of course I would have it open when I bring it to you, what kind of crap of a wife wouldn't?

(oh, and I have this groovy bottle opener tool thingy probably like what Eut was talking about.)

Quickly



I miss Blatant sillyness

My keychain is a bottle opener, so I always have one available.

with my fingers...but if its hard, you use a bit of shirt to grip it better
once, i sliced my skin just below my thumb trying to open a vb.
it hurt and it bled
stupid bottle tops
serves you right drinking that stuff ;)

I pry it open with the back of my pocket knife's blade.

I use my teeth. Or a picnic table.

I open birra with my hand.

http://img57.imageshack.us/img57/6218/beercomp2ks.jpg

Usually one at a time with whatever works to get the cap off. Lighters, bottle openers, another beer...

Reminds me of a little story, though. When I spend some time in the US and had my first beers over there, people always looked at me funny when I opened my beers with a lighter - until I realized that they were screw caps, or "twist to open" bottles.
Guess what happened to my left hand when I tried to open my first beer after I'd returned home? That's right - nice deep cuts and even more funny looks from my friends as those were not screw caps!

http://www.advertisementave.com/tv/ad.asp?adid=131

http://www.advertisementave.com/tv/ad.asp?adid=131


haha... :D

I use my church key. (slang for a waiter's corkscrew)

Or a lighter, or a drawer handle.

i was drinking with chuck norris the other day, and he didn't even take off the cap. he just bit of the cap taking some glass with it and commenced to chug the beer in like 1 second then repeated that 23 time until my entire case was gone, then dared me to say something because he drank all my beer.

I use the nearest radiator. I have a bottle opener attached to my keys, I just can't find them in times of need.

A Bic lighter, properly applied, works as well as any bottle-opener. *wisenod*

Never use your teeth again! :p
Heh, I learned that in Hungary from a guy from Chicago. Amazing - travel really does broaden the mind. Other methods of opening I've been known to employ:
Bottle opener (mostly)
Spoon
Table edge
Nail (metal, not finger)
Teeth
Arse-crack...nah, I'm kidding
Hammer (the claw bit...I don't smash the bottle)
Plug
Biro
Key

Holding it with the top upwards so that the beer doesn't fall out on the floor.

How else should I do it?

Where is the other option?

I open beer mostly with other beer bottle.

Holding it with the top upwards so that the beer doesn't fall out on the floor.

How else should I do it?
Not always a guarantee. I had a bottle of Gueuze Girardin with a cork top once. Unscrewed the wire, cork comes flying off, beer goes all over my lap and the floor. There was a dent in the ceiling where the cork hit.

i was drinking with chuck norris the other day, and he didn't even take off the cap. he just bit of the cap taking some glass with it and commenced to chug the beer in like 1 second then repeated that 23 time until my entire case was gone, then dared me to say something because he drank all my beer.
gahhhh chuck norris drink lite beer!

*nod*

:eek:

I don't. I don't drink alcohol, it's bad for your health.


I don't either, because i'm under 21. I'll tell you how I open my soda: It all depends. Glass: With towel or ask a grownup. Can: With my hands.

I use a bottle opener, myself. In college, if there was none to be found, the nearest doorframe would do the trick.

21?!?
I always forget that in some places you can vote, marry, kill and die for your country - all before you can have a pint.
I pity you. Really, I do :D

Heh, I learned that in Hungary from a guy from Chicago. Amazing - travel really does broaden the mind. Other methods of opening I've been known to employ:
Bottle opener (mostly)
Spoon
Table edge
Nail (metal, not finger)
Teeth
Arse-crack...nah, I'm kidding
Hammer (the claw bit...I don't smash the bottle)
Plug
Biro
Key
Ha ha ha Ring-piece!:D

Twist off: I stick it to the skin on the bottom of my arm and then fold my elbow. Twists it right off.

I have three bottle openers on my keychain for the non-twist off bottles.

break it over the head of the guy next to me.

serves you right drinking that stuff ;)

awww, its not so bad
anyway, it was new years and i wasnt sposed to be drinking
so i was happy just to have SOMETHING

i was drinking with chuck norris the other day, and he didn't even take off the cap. he just bit of the cap taking some glass with it and commenced to chug the beer in like 1 second then repeated that 23 time until my entire case was gone, then dared me to say something because he drank all my beer.
I noticed two spelling mistakes, meaning you asa follower of Chuck Norris are crap and more crap than she is, which is the crapiest crap that was ever crapped, and it isn't a good type of crap that can be used for fertilizer nope this is just crap crap that couldn't even infest people with thypus.

Poll coming.

Beer bottles are confusing and evil. They have these caps that are hard to take off. Naturally a variety of methods have grown up to address this problem and they include 'bottle openers', the nearest windowsill and your teeth. So how do you open yours? NS - more specifically me - wants to know.

(Personally, always wif the teeth)
Farmer

With my hand

With a .45.

Duh!

21?!?
I always forget that in some places you can vote, marry, kill and die for your country - all before you can have a pint.
I pity you. Really, I do :D
Apart from voting, that applies to Ireland (and I'm pretty sure the UK too). Marry at 14 with parental consent, and join the army at seventeen (I think.)

with a "church key"

some might call it a "bottle opener"

Who opens them? I eat them, crunchy outside goodness and all.

http://www.winepros.org/images-content/waiters_friend.gif
*nods*

Who opens them? I eat them, crunchy outside goodness and all.
But you're a mod, so you have special modly powers. I imagine very few of us mortal NSers could do that.