NationStates Jolt Archive

Which body part or function would you prefer to improve? Note: it must be modified from existing body parts.

Why is our future descendant species always called "Neo-sapiens" in movies?
That is a stupid name, can you do one better? Doesn't have to be latin.

Dead.

Dead.

Wha...? The consequence of over-specialization is extinction? That can't be true for human beings. I, for one, can never seem to do anything right. ;)

Cyborgs!

Which body part or function would you prefer to improve? Note: it must be modified from existing body parts.

Why is our future descendant species always called "Neo-sapiens" in movies?
That is a stupid name, can you do one better? Doesn't have to be latin.

Myself?

I would improve our minds. Make us REAIZE that it ISN'T a good idea to rape each other. In fact, a complete overhaul on it is an order.

1. Remove the want for recreatonal sex.

2. Try and remove lots of greed.

3. Remove the want for drugs.

4. Make it so that when a person is dumb enough, their brain makes their heart stop.

5. Generally, make us smarter.

6. Make us respect the envioronment.

7. Make us help each other more.

I thought just improving an organ was what was meant. :)

For me it would be the eye. I really don't care for the fact that the human eye just totally sucks.

I thought just improving an organ was what was meant. :)

For me it would be the eye. I really don't care for the fact that the human eye just totally sucks.

Well, if only actual, physical organs are allowed...

make our backs harder to injure.

Well, if only actual, physical organs are allowed...

make our backs harder to injure.

Basically, fix our stupid bent-up spine.

1. Remove the want for recreatonal sex.

You should die.

</joke>

Myself?

I would improve our minds. Make us REAIZE that it ISN'T a good idea to rape each other. In fact, a complete overhaul on it is an order.

1. Remove the want for recreatonal sex.

2. Try and remove lots of greed.

3. Remove the want for drugs.

4. Make it so that when a person is dumb enough, their brain makes their heart stop.

5. Generally, make us smarter.

6. Make us respect the envioronment.

7. Make us help each other more.

Shit, why live?!? :p

Myself?

I would improve our minds. Make us REAIZE that it ISN'T a good idea to rape each other. In fact, a complete overhaul on it is an order.

1. Remove the want for recreatonal sex.

2. Try and remove lots of greed.

3. Remove the want for drugs.

4. Make it so that when a person is dumb enough, their brain makes their heart stop.

5. Generally, make us smarter.

6. Make us respect the envioronment.

7. Make us help each other more.

Man I stopped when I reached line 1. If anything I would enhance the desire for recreational sex. Makes males more peaceful, like bonobos methink.

Man I stopped when I reached line 1. If anything I would enhance the desire for recreational sex. Makes males more peaceful, like bonobos methink.

What? Really, I can think of quite a few ways to spend your time more safely than sex.

I'd like us to evolve some skin that has photosynthetic properties, like tree leaves.

Heck, if it were efficient enough, we wouldn't need real food any more...just water and Miracle Grow. :p

Otherwise...everyone should hope that humanity evolves itself into immunity from all sexually transmitted diseases. :D

*cue cheesy 70's porno music*

I'd like us to evolve some skin that has photosynthetic properties, like tree leaves.

Heck, if it were efficient enough, we wouldn't need real food any more...just water and Miracle Grow. :p

Genius!

Wings?

Extra dexterious fingers?

I don't know...

Eyes that see in more spectrums, I'll go with that...

What? Really, I can think of quite a few ways to spend your time more safely than sex.

Like reading? Paper cuts my friends, can kill.

Which reminds me of - evolving enhanced skin that is stretchy and doesn't get cut or wrinkle easily. Neo-sapien (dammit think of a better name!) women would look twenty even when they are fifty!

I would make us more efficient. Sort out the waste disposal system. Sort out the inefficient circulatory system.

Then wipe us out and replace us with a cyborg, 'cos they OWNZ :P

Wings?

Extra dexterious fingers?

I don't know...

Eyes that see in more spectrums, I'll go with that...

Which spectrum is the one that sees through clothes?:rolleyes:

Which body part or function would you prefer to improve? Note: it must be modified from existing body parts.

Why is our future descendant species always called "Neo-sapiens" in movies?
That is a stupid name, can you do one better? Doesn't have to be latin.I would make it so that the consious part of the human brain has complete control over the unconsious part. These Posi-oids would be able to control how there brain functions, with sexy results, and probably many deaths.

Which spectrum is the one that sees through clothes?:rolleyes:
Okay...I would have settled for infrared or something...but, uh, whatever floats your boat, I guess...

Wings?

I concur. I've always dreamd about having a big set of wings, like a bird. Of course these would have to be working wings, so I could fly with them. I don't want wings that I can't fly with like a chicken or ostrich.

I concur. I've always dreamd about having a big set of wings, like a bird. Of course these would have to be working wings, so I could fly with them. I don't want wings that I can't fly with like a chicken or ostrich.

How would you put shirts on?

How would you put shirts on?
Um. Wingholes.

Let's be able to do Photosynthesis!

NEVER AGAIN SHALL WE HAVE TO GO TO THE SHOP TO BUY FOOD, HAHA EVIL CORPORATIONS!

Okay...I would have settled for infrared or something...but, uh, whatever floats your boat, I guess...
Infrared would be sweet. You could see in the dark, and when people are having a hotflash.....

Um. Wingholes.

How would you get the wings in the holes though? Imagine how the wings would be shaped, not to mention doing it along with your arms.

How would you get the wings in the holes though? Imagine how the wings would be shaped, not to mention doing it at along with your arms.
And the armless torso at Sears wonders how we get our shirts on with our arms. Obviously, would can figure two out, and four is not that much harder.

How would you get the wings in the holes though? Imagine how the wings would be shaped, not to mention doing it at along with your arms.

Well, I guess we could have two solutions. We'd either have to make special shirts, which I imagine would have a lot of velcro, or we could go shirtless.

Shirtless women running around with wings sounds neat, too. :)

And the armless torso at Sears wonders how we get our shirts on with our arms. Obviously, would can figure two out, and four is not that much harder.

Yeah, but thing wings wouldn't be as dexterious as the arms.

Well, I guess we could have two solutions. We'd either have to make special shirts, which I imagine would have a lot of velcro, or we could go shirtless.

Shirtless women running around with wings sounds neat, too. :)

I'm liking this scenario better.

BERETTA 92 FS
a bigger clip?

More neurones to kill more people?
:mp5:

Yeah, but thing wings wouldn't be as dexterious as the arms.
Well, depending on the type of flight we give ourselves we would need quite dexterious wings. If we flew from A to B skullbashing everything in between, then you would be right. However, that kind of flight would not go over well in, forexample, New York. We would give our selves the ability to be quite agile in flight requiring the dexterious wings that we could get through a shirt.

Well, I guess we could have two solutions. We'd either have to make special shirts, which I imagine would have a lot of velcro, or we could go shirtless.

Shirtless women running around with wings sounds neat, too. :)
The shirtless things sounds cool, but ponchos would work too.

I'm liking this scenario better.
Ride the bus. Then ask yourself "Do I want to see any of those women without shirts on?"

The shirtless things sounds cool, but ponchos would work too.

How would we keep ponchos on, or at least down, while we fly?

Ride the bus. Then ask yourself "Do I want to see any of those women without shirts on?"
Definitely ponchos then.

How would we keep ponchos on, or at least down, while we fly?
A belt.

The shirtless things sounds cool, but ponchos would work too.

Yeah, I imagine we'd have to adopt a whole new style of fashion to accomdate our wings. Teenagers would get wing piercings and everything.

Yeah, I imagine we'd have to adopt a whole new style of fashion to accomdate our wings. Teenagers would get wing piercings and everything.
Which would probably screw up their areodynamics enough to render them flightless.

Ride the bus. Then ask yourself "Do I want to see any of those women without shirts on?"

Well, we'd also have advanced eyes like these people said, with the power of selective vision, and a temporary memory in the eyes so we actually can erase the sort of things we never wanted to see. Like if someone got you with a tubgirl or goatse, it wouldn't immediatly sear onto your brain, it'd stay in your eye's mind for a moment and you could stop it from going farther. ^_^

Ride the bus. Then ask yourself "Do I want to see any of those women without shirts on?"

I bet if we all developed wings, then forms of transportation like cars, busses, and subways would decline and maybe disappear except for long distance travel. It might be easier to fly from point A to B rather than drive, and faster. My understanding is that some eagles can fly around 200 MPH.

Hopefully we would all be more healthy as a result, and obesity would drop. Wings are great for all.

A belt.

Curses, foiled again. So, when we evolve wings...invest in ponchos and belts?

Well, we'd also have advanced eyes like these people said, with the power of selective vision, and a temporary memory in the eyes so we actually can erase the sort of things we never wanted to see. Like if someone got you with a tubgirl or goatse, it wouldn't immediatly sear onto your brain, it'd stay in your eye's mind for a moment and you could stop it from going farther. ^_^
But when you are flying, do you really want a five second delay. Realisticly, we would have to be able to fly over 10 m/s in order to stay airborn. That would mean that when you are flying if anything changed in the 50 meters ahead of you, you would be truely fucked.

Curses, foiled again. So, when we evolve wings...invest in ponchos and belts?

Perhaps if our wings were as long as our body from where they join to the shoulders to the tips, we could cover up with the wings alone.

I bet if we all developed wings, then forms of transportation like cars, busses, and subways would decline and maybe disappear except for long distance travel. It might be easier to fly from point A to B rather than drive, and faster. My understanding is that some eagles can fly around 200 MPH.

Hopefully we would all be more healthy as a result, and obesity would drop. Wings are great for all.
Exnay on the ogiclay.

But when you are flying, do you really want a five second delay. Realisticly, we would have to be able to fly over 10 m/s in order to stay airborn. That would mean that when you are flying if anything changed in the 50 meters ahead of you, you would be truely fucked.

Right, flying would be dangerous. Much moreso than riding a bicycle or walking down the street. I still want wings.

But when you are flying, do you really want a five second delay. Realisticly, we would have to be able to fly over 10 m/s in order to stay airborn. That would mean that when you are flying if anything changed in the 50 meters ahead of you, you would be truely fucked.

Well, no, you still see it, it's that for those things you wish you'd never seen you have a short opporunity to not see them. The mini eye-brain would have enough cortex to aid in basic understanding and such I suppose.

Right, flying would be dangerous. Much moreso than riding a bicycle or walking down the street. I still want wings.
But, ifwe go through the trouble of developing wings, we would certanly prepare our minds to handle flight.

Perhaps if our wings were as long as our body from where they join to the shoulders to the tips, we could cover up with the wings alone.

Hmm...intresting...

Well, no, you still see it, it's that for those things you wish you'd never seen you have a short opporunity to not see them. The mini eye-brain would have enough cortex to aid in basic understanding and such I suppose.
But it would require you to process the data you are seeing twice, which would reduce your reaction time significantly enough to make you an air hazard.

But it would require you to process the data you are seeing twice, which would reduce your reaction time significantly enough to make you an air hazard.

...Then well just have to develop the technology and/or ability to erase memories at wil in our regular brain!

...Then well just have to develop the technology and/or ability to erase memories at wil in our regular brain!
Or wear shirts.

Lets see, complex and error prone memory erase which could be used for government oppression, or shirts. Living in a false world, or shirts. Censoring your life, or shirts. Hating freedom, or shirts.

Modify facial hair so that if you wax it three times it's gone forever.

Increase our metabolism so that we store less fat, and maximize human fat storage at 20% of body weight.

1. Remove the want for recreatonal sex.How come? I could see removing the sex drive and sex being the same as any other recreational activity, but why remove the desire to do it recreationally? If you're going to do that, you'd might as well remove all desire for sex now that we have test tube babies.

Criminy, i can't believe one of y'all ain't yet posted this one yet ...:

Prehensile penis control, like elephants have.

Perhaps even, a prehensile bifurcated penis for which to accomplish multiple impregnations (or other angles on recreational sex, WooT!)

Oh yeah, perhaps a quicker migration of body hair, attenuated by galvanic massage.

Criminy, i can't believe one of y'all ain't yet posted this one yet ...:

Prehensile penis control, like elephants have.

Perhaps even, a prehensile bifurcated penis for which to accomplish multiple impregnations (or other angles on recreational sex, WooT!)

Oh yeah, perhaps a quicker migration of body hair, attenuated by galvanic massage.
What the fuck is "Criminy"?

Also, what is your facination with the penis?

Criminy, i can't believe one of y'all ain't yet posted this one yet ...:

Prehensile penis control, like elephants have.

Perhaps even, a prehensile bifurcated penis for which to accomplish multiple impregnations (or other angles on recreational sex, WooT!)

Oh yeah, perhaps a quicker migration of body hair, attenuated by galvanic massage.

Something about the penis did enter my mind, but I figured I'd just get big wings to compensate.

Something about the penis did enter my mind, but I figured I'd just get big wings to compensate.Yeah, if it's too big, you'll just have to fly higher, which will reduce your chances of defecating on people.

Or wear shirts.

Lets see, complex and error prone memory erase which could be used for government oppression, or shirts. Living in a false world, or shirts. Censoring your life, or shirts. Hating freedom, or shirts.

Oh shush. I just wanted to complain about wings.

Yeah, if it's too big, you'll just have to fly higher, which will reduce your chances of defecating on people.
In Soviet Russia, people defecate on you!

In Soviet Russia, people defecate on you!Well, yeah, if everyone has wings except for you.

Oh shush. I just wanted to complain about wings.
Score one for Posi. My spelling errors, and subsequent edits, showed that genius who's who.

Something about the penis did enter my mind, but I figured I'd just get big wings to compensate.

In Soviet Russia, people defecate on you!
Hahaha!
*FLORT*
:D

EDIT: BTW ...
http://www.worldwidewords.org/qa/qa-cri1.htm


EDIT of EDIT:
@Posi:
Not a preoccupation, persay, with the penis ... just something i know just about every guy has issues with at some point (the penis, not the being prehensile part). It would also be an augmentation that their partner(s) would be pretty appreciative.

Well, yeah, if everyone has wings except for you.

And, you know, people don't land to poop, and somehow find a way to continue to fly through the process of defecating.

Well, yeah, if everyone has wings except for you.
I think this is what Dinaverg should be complaining about.

And, you know, people don't land to poop, and somehow find a way to continue to fly through the process of defacating.

That's when you decide it's a good thing that there are all of these surplus WWII-era 40mm Bofors guns.

Score one for Posi. My spelling errors, and subsequent edits, showed that genius who's who.

Huh?

And, you know, people don't land to poop, and somehow find a way to continue to fly through the process of defacating.
We can do it while running when our legs are moving, why not flying when our legs are closer to motionless?

And, you know, people don't land to poop, and somehow find a way to continue to fly through the process of defacating.What would be the point of having wings if not for fecal target practice? We have machines that can transport people.

We can do it while running when our legs are moving, why not flying when our legs are closer to motionless?

How the heck would you know we can do it while running? Has this happened before and I'm not aware of it?

How the heck would you know we can do it while running? Has this happened before and I'm not aware of it?
I believe it was an episode of Jackass that showed me the light. EDIT: Actually, it was pirating an episode of Jackass.

How the heck would you know we can do it while running? Has this happened before and I'm not aware of it?
Don't you know why they call it "the trots"?!?

Personal experience after too much grape juice tells me it's QUITE, QUITE possible. I recommend overindulging on the grape juice.

I believe it was an episode of Jackass that showed me the light.
Don't you mean, "the dark and runny?"

And, wasn't there a matchbox car in a prophylactic stuffed up there?

That stuff is all fine and dandy, but I want a new organ. My organ is simple, it produces new stem cells where needed, and ships them around the body. Instant regeneration and everlasting life!

That stuff is all fine and dandy, but I want a new organ. My organ is simple, it produces new stem cells where needed, and ships them around the body. Instant regeneration and everlasting life!
Yeah, but with my consious subconsious idea you could give yourself permanent brain damage, which is pure awesome.

That stuff is all fine and dandy, but I want a new organ. My organ is simple, it produces new stem cells where needed, and ships them around the body. Instant regeneration and everlasting life!

Thats a pretty good one. I think one of the best I've heard.

Thats a pretty good one. I think one of the best I've heard.
Yeah, too bad it breaks the rules, goodbye.

Actually, this is what stem cell researchers should be working on.

I want sharks with laser beams attached to their foreheads too. :p

I'd want wings, but I think the most likely thing would be eye advancement.
Of course, in fifty years the cybernetic eyes they have now will be able to have color and stuff, so I'll just pluck out my eye and get a new one.

Seriously.

Oh, I have an other idea. What about a change in the skin so we could bend light around us and be invisible like in the Predator movies.

Oh, I have an other idea. What about a change in the skin so we could bend light around us and be invisible like in the Predator movies.
But if you were invisible people would fly right into you.

Oh, I have an other idea. What about a change in the skin so we could bend light around us and be invisible like in the Predator movies.

I'll one-up that.

What about we all transfer our consciousnesses into giant, smooth black monoliths and use them to travel through out space (and time)?

Which body part or function would you prefer to improve? Note: it must be modified from existing body parts.

Why is our future descendant species always called "Neo-sapiens" in movies?
That is a stupid name, can you do one better? Doesn't have to be latin.
Opposable toes!

Myself?

I would improve our minds. Make us REAIZE that it ISN'T a good idea to rape each other. In fact, a complete overhaul on it is an order.

1. Remove the want for recreatonal sex.

2. Try and remove lots of greed.

3. Remove the want for drugs.

4. Make it so that when a person is dumb enough, their brain makes their heart stop.

5. Generally, make us smarter.

6. Make us respect the envioronment.

7. Make us help each other more.
Most of those are cultural changes, not physical changes.

I'll one-up that.

What about we all transfer our consciousnesses into giant, smooth black monoliths and use them to travel through out space (and time)?

Sneeze *rip-off*!

I just want my tail back.

Opposable toes!

So that I can pick both my ears AND my nostrils at the same time? Sweet.

I just want my tail back.

Girls running around with tails would be hot.

Sneeze *rip-off*!

Don't let the Monoliths hear you! They might turn Jupiter into a star and then send a communique to their evil overlords demanding that human civilization be destroyed!

And, yes, it was a blatent rip-off. I'm surprised that it didn't take very long for someone to catch on!

I'm only disturbed by some of the answers on this thread. For some reason, it leads me to remember about this article I read earlier on MSN odd news:

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/12356642/

As for evolution change, I would perhaps go for telepathy. That'd be cool to have. Perfect for military use (with training provided on mental barrier strength).

Don't let the Monoliths hear you! They might turn Jupiter into a star and then send a communique to their evil overlords demanding that human civilization be destroyed!

And, yes, it was a blatent rip-off. I'm surprised that it didn't take very long for someone to catch on!

I actually didn't want to be the first to reply. I read somewhere that sci-fi geeks don't get laid. Doh! :(

I actually didn't want to be the first to reply. I read somewhere that sci-fi geeks don't get laid. Doh! :(

Obviously those people have never heard of, nor met, Jill! ;)

Obviously those people have never heard of, nor met, Jill! ;)

So what of this "Jill"? Did she consummate like a bunny?

Well, lesse here...wings are good. That everlasting life organ is nice.

But me? I'm thinking cat ears. And a furry cat tail. Why? Because semi-furries are the single most hottest thing in existence. Full furries are just...no...and while no furries are fun, semi-furries are even more fun. Maybe it's the cuteness aspect, because I'm definitely attracted to cuteness. =/

And intelligence. While we're at it, we're a lot more intelligent too. Incredibly intelligent catboys and catgirls. Yep. I'd say that's perfect.

Umm.... I dunno.... Everyone should have a penis? :)

Umm.... I dunno.... Everyone should have a penis? :)
Hmm...shemales that actually look like women, sound like women, ect. but have a penis. Interesting experimental idea.

'Course, I know what you really mean, but I don't think that would work too well. Not everyone, at least.

Hmm...shemales that actually look like women, sound like women, ect. but have a penis. Interesting experimental idea.

'Course, I know what you really mean, but I don't think that would work too well. Not everyone, at least.
You're probably right. But yes... an interesting idea.

I actually didn't want to be the first to reply. I read somewhere that sci-fi geeks don't get laid. Doh! :(
No problem, they've got opposable thumbs. And Eve Online, of course.

Myself?

I would improve our minds. Make us REAIZE that it ISN'T a good idea to rape each other. In fact, a complete overhaul on it is an order.

1. Remove the want for recreatonal sex.

2. Try and remove lots of greed.

3. Remove the want for drugs.

4. Make it so that when a person is dumb enough, their brain makes their heart stop.

5. Generally, make us smarter.

6. Make us respect the envioronment.

7. Make us help each other more.

Been there done that:p

[/joke]

Its true though.

In Soviet Russia, people defecate on you!
Family Guy

"In Soviet Russia, Car drive you"

Cookie? :(

Which body part or function would you prefer to improve? Note: it must be modified from existing body parts.

Why is our future descendant species always called "Neo-sapiens" in movies?
That is a stupid name, can you do one better? Doesn't have to be latin.

They should be called homo super sapiens. the question is, what adaptation would give us a survival/reproductive advantage? shit I cant think of anything I just wanted to say homosupersapiens. what a great word.

If you have ever played Psychonauts, I want those powers, but not to look like them!

Or a Doctor Who style body, with 2 hearts and 12 regenerations(time travel optional)

They should be called homo super sapiens. the question is, what adaptation would give us a survival/reproductive advantage? shit I cant think of anything I just wanted to say homosupersapiens. what a great word.

Ability to consummate like bunnies would be one.

Ability to consummate like bunnies would be one.

Not with 9 month pregnancies that seldom tend to produce more than 1 child.

Not with 9 month pregnancies that seldom tend to produce more than 1 child.

I know what you're saying. I just like the term "consummate like bunnies". :)

Speaking of which, since the human infant is a very premature and helpless being compared to a chimpanzee infant, much development (especially brain) occurs after birth. The way this trend goes, gestation could become shorter and shorter. Perhaps in a few hundred generation, human babies will pop out after say 5 months.

Ready to be assimilated into a world of underaged boozing and recreational sex, by current standards. Both of which are kewl.

*BTW I'm drunk. On rum and coke.* Where the f**k is that Pilsner rabbit?

It depends upon how much we change. If just a little or somewhat, Homo sapiens superior. If a lot, simply Homo superior.

Penis all the way.

It depends upon how much we change. If just a little or somewhat, Homo sapiens superior. If a lot, simply Homo superior.

I prefer iSapiens.

I prefer iSapiens.

ROFLOL. Sapiens Service Pack 2?

I want sharks with laser beams attached to their foreheads too. :p
"Or the dogs with bees in their mouths and when they bark they shoot bees at you?"
:D

Girls running around with tails would be hot.
See Foxy Love from the cartoon, Drawn Together.
*nods emphatically*
Pretty much any'll do, but of special note is the Luke Skywalker-in-the-cave-on-Hoth part. I probably shouldn't explain further.

Hmm...shemales that actually look like women, sound like women, ect. but have a penis. Interesting experimental idea.

'Course, I know what you really mean, but I don't think that would work too well. Not everyone, at least.
It worked for the clams in Boston Harbor after the incidents with the red anti-barnacle paint!!!

n/k

Sapiens Vista.

According to Vonnegut's Galápagos humanity will evolve according to their surroundings.

I'd like to see Russia's polar-sapiens take on Egypt's cobra-sapiens in a battle to the death.

Any bets?

Me, I'd want to see the pinky finger and toe done away with. Pesky things they are, not worth much, but hurt like shit if they break.

Family Guy

"In Soviet Russia, Car drive you"

Cookie? :(
I dunno, mine was totally repulsive and bound to make someone stop eating there breakfast. All you did was watch a good TV show.

ROFLOL. Sapiens Service Pack 2?

Homo sapiens awesomus. With tentacle penises, wings, self-regenerating organs and frickin' lasers on their frickin' foreheads.

Sounds like a superboss in a videogame.

Me, I'd want to see the pinky finger and toe done away with. Pesky things they are, not worth much, but hurt like shit if they break.

But what would you pick your nose with? Your forefinger?

But what would you pick your nose with? Your forefinger?

You pick your nose with your pinky?

Mutant powers like X-Men

Homo-Superior

...i like x-men...

Homo sapiens awesomus. With tentacle penises, wings, self-regenerating organs and frickin' lasers on their frickin' foreheads.

Sounds like a superboss in a videogame.
Don't forget furry with lil cat ears and a tail.

Don't forget furry with lil cat ears and a tail.

That too. ;)

Someone with art skillz that killz should draw this blasphamey.

But what would you pick your nose with? Your forefinger?
No, we've established this already ... the prehensile penis.
*nods*
*thinks of a limerick*

No, we've established this already ... the prehensile penis.
*nods*
*thinks of a limerick*
[museum currator]If you focus your attention downwards, you will see why this species was know for slouching.[/museum currator]

[museum currator]If you focus your attention downwards, you will see why this species was know for slouching.[/museum currator]
:D
Ah, sweeeeeeeeet extinction.

Clyde Bruckman: Not that it's any of my business, but autoerotic asphyxiation is a really undignified way to die.
Mulder: What makes you say that?
Clyde Bruckman: Never mind. Forget I said anything.

No, we've established this already ... the prehensile penis.
*nods*
*thinks of a limerick*

*shakes head*

What will they think of next?

Man I stopped when I reached line 1. If anything I would enhance the desire for recreational sex. Makes males more peaceful, like bonobos methink.

Actually, increasing sexual drive can be considered a bad thing.

*shakes head*

What will they think of next?
Ear swab?

No, wait, sorry ... just got to the end of the limerick. My bad.

Actually, increasing sexual drive can be considered a bad thing.
.....increasing blisters?

.....increasing blisters?
Methinks "moderation"

Methinks "moderation"
Oh, oh ... ambidexterity and equal time! *nods emphatically*

Oh, oh ... ambidexterity and equal time! *nods emphatically*
We are having two know? Why? So both can go unused?

Oh, oh ... ambidexterity and equal time! *nods emphatically*

Dammit that just starts all those "Married to my right hand" jokes.

We are having two know? Why? So both can go unused?
:eek:
Creepy, it's like you really know me. How did you know i can't even keep myself satisfied? :(

EDIT: To all y'all yoga fans, the number's really "four". ;)

Dammit that just starts all those "Married to my right hand" jokes.
You mean like being married with a tempting mistress?
You know the bad part ... the right hand finds out about the left hand, the public displays of aggression, the wistful middle-of-the-night phone calls, the right hand's unceasing comparisons to the left hand by it, the divorce, and the right hand gets half of everything you've worked so hard for ... ;)

You mean like being married with a tempting mistress?
You know the bad part ... the right hand finds out about the left hand, the public displays of aggression, the wistful middle-of-the-night phone calls, the right hand's unceasing comparisons to the left hand by it, the divorce, and the right hand gets half of everything you've worked so hard for ... ;)

Yeah, those jokes.

Murphy's Law on Forum Discussions: True love becomes boob love becomes self love -deterministic.

WTF.

Yeah, those jokes.

Murphy's Law on Forum Discussions: True love becomes boob love becomes self love -deterministic.

WTF.You sound a little Skinner-ish there. Mmmm, heady nostalgia ...

WAIT .... what does "true love" have to do with this thread again? C'mon, i've already got brand here. *shakes head*

You sound a little Skinner-ish there. Mmmm, heady nostalgia ...

WAIT .... what does "true love" have to do with this thread again? C'mon, i've already got brand here. *shakes head*

Am not Skinner-ish. Unless you are a ferocious furry white rabbit with a voice that sounds like a booming bell...

Insider joke dude. Starting laughing.:rolleyes:

Am not Skinner-ish. Unless you are a ferocious furry white rabbit with a voice that sounds like a booming bell...

Insider joke dude. Starting laughing.:rolleyes:
Harvey?
It was funny until Weird Al stole it and renamed his hamster after it ... :(

Harvey?
It was funny until Weird Al stole it and renamed his hamster after it ... :(

Weird Al ... Yankovich?

Am not Skinner-ish. Unless you are a ferocious furry white rabbit with a voice that sounds like a booming bell...

Insider joke dude. Starting laughing.:rolleyes:
OMGBBQHAX BABY ALBERT PWNT!!

;)

You sound a little Skinner-ish there. Mmmm, heady nostalgia ...

WAIT .... what does "true love" have to do with this thread again? C'mon, i've already got brand here. *shakes head*
and Fruedians would have a hayday about you using the word "head" so often :D

and Fruedians would have a hayday about you using the word "head" so often :D
Remember what i said about "brand"? ;)

and i bet Skinner's lab assistant would have loved the prehensile penis evolution :D

(last unprompted psychology post from me, i swear!)

Weird Al ... Yankovich?
Yep, the same.


SJS Fun Fact: I was the first fan EVER to sign HIM. Absolute veracity.

and i bet Skinner's lab assistant would have loved the prehensile penis evolution :D

(last unprompted psychology post from me, i swear!)
Absolutely not! I meant B. "Mutha" F.'r Skinner, in earnest! You tagged it just fine!

Remember what i said about "brand"? ;)
"a cutting or thrusting weapon with a long blade [syn: sword, blade, steel]"

brand... sword... phallic symbol??

or is there a slang meaning i'm totally missing?

OMGBBQHAX BABY ALBERT PWNT!!

;)

Ah a fellow behaviorist afficinado. So what S-R stands for again? Solid-Rocks?Stroke-Rigid? Sex-Relief? Sounds-Randy?

Man I should have been awake in those classes. Instead of dreaming. About Jello-wrestling.

My family lines Penis size will be reduced so as not to split the women folk in half.

Yep, the same.


SJS Fun Fact: I was the first fan EVER to sign HIM. Absolute veracity.


*Thinks to self: Sci-fi fans and Weird Al fans never get laid... must deny fandom... must...*

I do not know of this Weird Al Yankovich of whom you speak.

"a cutting or thrusting weapon with a long blade [syn: sword, blade, steel]"

brand... sword... phallic symbol??

or is there a slang meaning i'm totally missing?
The latter.
Think of it kinda like Stephen Colbert's "Scorn" cologne.

*Thinks to self: Sci-fi fans and Weird Al fans never get laid... must deny fandom... must...*

I do not know of this Weird Al Yankovich of whom you speak.
Hahahaha!
You gotta admit though, his love song lyrics put many a popular country song to shame.
*thinks to self: ... "One More Minute" and "You Don't Love Me Anymore"*

Ah a fellow behaviorist afficinado. So what S-R stands for again? Solid-Rocks?Stroke-Rigid? Sex-Relief? Sounds-Randy?

Man I should have been awake in those classes. Instead of dreaming. About Jello-wrestling.
er... i shoulda taken better notes in my classes. i know S^D is "discriminative stimulus", and there's another similar two-letter term dealing with rate and - hell, i'm going to that class in less than eight hours, so no need to talk about it here! :p

although, following the similar lines of thought this thread's gone through, i kinda liked the sound of the second and third guess...

*EDIT*
bah, wouldn't you know i find the definition not 15 seconds after i click "submit" S-R Approach (Contiguity): The S-R Approach is the "stimulus-response" approach and is based on the premise of Contiguity, which states, for learning to occur, the response must occur in the presence of or very soon after a stimulus is presented, or an association will not occur. In essence, this is a behaviorist view based on the idea that learning will occur only if events occur relatively close together in time.
from http://www.alleydog.com/glossary/definition.cfm?term=S-R%20Approach%20(Contiguity)

Hahahaha!
You gotta admit though, his love song lyrics put many a popular country song to shame.
*thinks to self: ... "One More Minute" and "You Don't Love Me Anymore"*

*...must deny... MUST!"

I can't respond to that, since I've got marbles in my mouth... I mean since I've been living with a hernia... like a surgeon... cause I'm fat, I'm fat, you know it!

Rats.

Absolutely not! I meant B. "Mutha" F.'r Skinner, in earnest! You tagged it just fine!
oh, ouch, ow... puns... too bad, even... for me...:eek:

*...must deny... MUST!"

I can't respond to that, since I've got marbles in my mouth... I mean since I've been living with a hernia... like a surgeon... cause I'm fat, I'm fat, you know it!

Rats.
*does an iron lung impression*

*does an iron lung impression*
Frumptopia?

oh, ouch, ow... puns... too bad, even... for me...:eek:
Looks like another brand just hit the shelf. Hoo-rah.

Looks like another brand just hit the shelf. Hoo-rah.
gah! what is this "brand" slang you speak of?! i'm still not getting it! (i blame awake-way-too-lateage and not-eating-as-a-hypoglycemicness)

*...must deny... MUST!"

I can't respond to that, since I've got marbles in my mouth... I mean since I've been living with a hernia... like a surgeon... cause I'm fat, I'm fat, you know it!

Rats.
No worries. Self-respect is a peculiar commodity 'round here ... and when i say "commodity", i mean it in the sense of how most people's sense of respect goes down the commode when they associate with me in some fashion. As well as esteem in the "public"'s eye.
No worries!

No worries. Self-respect is a peculiar commodity 'round here ... and when i say "commodity", i mean it in the sense of how most people's sense of respect goes down the commode when they associate with me in some fashion. As well as esteem in the "public"'s eye.
No worries!
bad Straughn! go put a quarter in the Pun Jar! :D

bad Straughn! go put a quarter in the Pun Jar! :D

Sticks and stones may break my bones, but puns will tie me up on leather straps, scorch me with lit cigarettes and whip me into subservience!

Wait a sec.

gah! what is this "brand" slang you speak of?! i'm still not getting it! (i blame awake-way-too-lateage and not-eating-as-a-hypoglycemicness)
This might help ....:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Brand
...a brand is the symbolic embodiment of all the information connected with a company, product or service.
...
It also encompasses the set of expectations associated with a product or service which typically arise in the minds of people.
...
The psychological aspect, sometimes referred to as the brand image, is a symbolic construct created within the minds of people and consists of all the information and expectations associated with a product or service.
-
:D

Sticks and stones may break my bones, but puns will tie me up on leather straps, scorch me with lit cigarettes and whip me into subservience!

Wait a sec.
Okay, now you're moving out of Weird Al .... somewhat ... but DEFINITELY moving into Tom Lehrer. *bows*

bad Straughn! go put a quarter in the Pun Jar! :D
Yep, brand it is. *nods*

Oh wow, my mud wrestling thread just got killed. For stupidity! Is that kewl or what. Awesome.

Oh wow, my mud wrestling thread just got killed. For stupidity! Is that kewl or what. Awesome.
It sure was a good waste of 15 minutes.

Oh wow, my mud wrestling thread just got killed. For stupidity! Is that kewl or what. Awesome.
Quite a hooter collection you'd managed to accumulate. :eek:

BTW, WHAT is the deal with this place and owlies? Another Futurama nod?

Quite a hooter collection you'd managed to accumulate. :eek:

BTW, WHAT is the deal with this place and owlies? Another Futurama nod?
I never got the Owl joke...

I never got the Owl joke...
Perhaps there's the ubiquitous but ever-subtle hand of Myrth in all of that. It would explain a lot.

I never got the Owl joke...

Me neither. I thought I found everything funny. Guess not.:rolleyes:

In Soviet Russia, people defecate on you!

They do??

Wow!!

I've never BEEN shat on by people from a country that hasn't actually existed for years!

They do??

Wow!!

I've never BEEN shat on by people from a country that hasn't actually existed for years!
Sure you have.
Ever since the sh*t went down ( :rolleyes: ) at Chernobyl, a little "scatolite" helping has been in the circulatory air drift and settled in nicely in other places with a gentle, steady rain and some help from the jet stream.

Sure you have.
Ever since the sh*t went down ( :rolleyes: ) at Chernobyl, a little "scatolite" helping has been in the circulatory air drift and settled in nicely in other places with a gentle, steady rain and some help from the jet stream.

A fair point, probably. I sit corrected.

A fair point, probably. I sit corrected.
Here's a cute lil' bit o'bible paranoia for you ...

SJS Fun Factoid: "Chernobyl" = "Wormwood"