NationStates Jolt Archive

If you were going to be executed, heaven forbid, which method of execution would you pick? Please be honest and serious.

If you were going to be executed, heaven forbid, which method of execution would you pick? Please be honest and serious.
I would be chases off a cliff by naked women, like in Monty Pyhton's The Meaning Of LIfe.


Sorry, but execution and death are such funny topics that I just couldn't resist.

I would be chases off a cliff by naked women, like in Monty Pyhton's The Meaning Of LIfe.


Sorry, but execution and death are such funny topics that I just couldn't resist.

lol.

Decapitation -- probably wouldn't feel a thing.

Firing Squad. relatively painless.

Oh crap, I said lethal injection. On second thought, I want to be chased off a cliff by toppless women. :D

Death by 10 kg of anti-hydrogen. If I go out, the rest of you fuckers are coming with me.

Death by 10 kg of anti-hydrogen. If I go out, the rest of you fuckers are coming with me.
Us fuckers, as you say, would be fine. By my calculations 10 kg of antimatter would be equivalent to about 309.915579 megatons of TNT. There are nuclear bombs bigger than that.

Decapitation -- probably wouldn't feel a thing.
Or you could suffer in agony for several minutes while still conscious. I heard roaches can live up to 3 weeks without their bodies, you know.

I think it'd be cool to be sentenced to death by explosion. I just can't imagine a manlier way out.

i'm not talking about getting my head sawed off... i'm talking about an axe or a guillotine... have it lopped right off.

could we possibly feel pain without a head?

I would be chases off a cliff by naked women, like in Monty Pyhton's The Meaning Of LIfe.


Sorry, but execution and death are such funny topics that I just couldn't resist.
There's only one problem with it being an execution method - "Why would you run?"

Firing squad. Die on your feet.

Lethal injection, I am too lazy to die on my feet.

I guess they could knock me out with alcohol and valium then administer a lethal dose of heroin.

If you had the choice between a painful and lengthy death or a short painless one, which would you take?
The only catch is, if you choose a short and painless the executioner slips his finger into your arse while he does it, and you are fully aware of it.

(apoligies to ricky gervais, from whom i stole this from)

Would have to be lethal injection, as long as they knock me out. The other methods are either not as quick and painless (as long as you're unconsious), and most of them have a degree of human error attached - firing squad might miss everything important, no matter how many of them there are, and leave to to bleed to death in the dirt, hanging might end up with a rope not quite long enough to kill you instantly and end up strangling you to death, decapitation leaves the brain alive for anywhere up to four minutes (but it usually dies within the first minute), as you feel the blood draining from your severed head, stoning can take ages to kill you, unless the first on is thrown by a really big guy with flawless aim and a killer arm straight at your head and electric chair doesn't kill you imediately, but causes short term incredible pain. Anyone ever get shocked by someting other than static? I grabbed an electric fence once, while it was on and my arm hurt and my muscles spasmed for hours!

Us fuckers, as you say, would be fine. By my calculations 10 kg of antimatter would be equivalent to about 309.915579 megatons of TNT. There are nuclear bombs bigger than that.
Hold on, give me a minute. It's 3.6 X 10^18 Joules of energy. One joule will raise a 1 kg weight ten centimeters. I think this is more than ~310 megatons. And this is discounting the massive amounts of radiation released.

Also, the most powerful nuclear weapon ever tested wasn't even 100 megatons, if I remember correctly.

Liasia']If you had the choice between a painful and lengthy death or a short painless one, which would you take?
The only catch is, if you choose a short and painless the executioner slips his finger into your arse while he does it, and you are fully aware of it.

(apoligies to ricky gervais, from whom i stole this from)

Short and painless with the executioner violating my anus.

In mortal combat with my would-be executors. Duh.

In mortal combat with my would-be executors. Duh.

I love your self-confidence

I myself would prefer death by age a long and torturous death involving kids, a wife and dare I say it bills!

In mortal combat with my would-be executors. Duh.
But would they be would-be executioners? :confused:

Decapitation. Preferably in public so that people hear why I'm being killed, like in the good old days, and without the executioner's finger up my butt, kthxbi.

I chose decapitation provided that it was done with a guillotine, and the blade was properly balanced and very sharp, I don't think I would like getting my head halfway cut off. ;)

In combat....like a true samurai!

But would they be would-be executioners? :confused:
Some of them would be would-be executioners. Others would be executioners, not would-be executioners.

Heck, if I just sit there, I get killed however they want to do it. At least if I fight my way out they kill me on my terms.

There's only one problem with it being an execution method - "Why would you run?"
That, my good friend, is one of life's mysteries...

That, my good friend, is one of life's mysteries...
Cause you don't want to die?

I chose stoning because hopefully if I'm being executed it was for something really bad (or martyrdom) and I want it to be as painful and frightening as possible. Of the choices I think having rocks hurled at me was the best.

Hold on, give me a minute. It's 3.6 X 10^18 Joules of energy. One joule will raise a 1 kg weight ten centimeters. I think this is more than ~310 megatons. And this is discounting the massive amounts of radiation released.

Also, the most powerful nuclear weapon ever tested wasn't even 100 megatons, if I remember correctly.
10 kg * c^2 = 8.98755179 × 10^17 J
1 megaton of TNT = 4.184 × 10^15 J
8.98755179 × 10^17 J / 4.184 × 10^15 J = 214.807643
So I messed up a little bit (I don't know why).

Anyways thats assuming all of the antimatter turns into kinetic or other destructive energy. It is estimated that 60% of the energy turns into harmless neutrinos (acording to wikipedia). That means that it is more like 85.9230572 Megatons of TNT. By comparison the Tsar bomb (the largest ever detonated) was 57 megatons, roughly twice as powerful. Quite powerful, but not powerful enough to destory all us fuckers.

10 kg * c^2 = 8.98755179 × 10^17 J
1 megaton of TNT = 4.184 × 10^15 J
8.98755179 × 10^17 J / 4.184 × 10^15 J = 214.807643
So I messed up a little bit (I don't know why).

Anyways thats assuming all of the antimatter turns into kinetic or other destructive energy. It is estimated that 60% of the energy turns into harmless neutrinos (acording to wikipedia). That means that it is more like 85.9230572 Megatons of TNT. By comparison the Tsar bomb (the largest ever detonated) was 57 megatons, roughly twice as powerful. Quite powerful, but not powerful enough to destory all us fuckers.
It's double that. You forgot that matter is annihlated as well.

firing squad, with an GAU-8 Avenger off an A-10 warthog...all 1350 rounds in the belt please. If not, a regular old 12 men at dawn style is good too.

Death by being fed into a fully spooled up turbofan sounds cool too. (quickly fed I mean, let the intake suction just carry me in at full speed)

Firing squad would be alright. Especially if the squad are armed with something ludicrous like RPGs or Miniguns, or if the squad are all dressed like clowns or something.

I really do think that firing squad has to be the most humane method of execution.

Poisoned cake.

Firing squad. Get it over & done with. I'd also like to look my executioners in the eye.

I love your self-confidence
I think the chances are reasonable that if I'm going to be executed, it will be by someone I don't want to execute me. Once that much is settled, the method of eventual death becomes obvious; fight like hell unleashed.

It's double that. You forgot that matter is annihlated as well.
Ah, yes. Oops. Well my point is it would only take out Rhode Island not the world.

I chose firing squad. Why? Because, I want to go out in dignity and honor, not hung, injected, or shocked as a common criminal; decapitated as a traitor to "Mother Europe" (it seemed to be the favorite form of execution among Europe's monarchs); and certainly not chased off a cliff by naked women!

However, I think my favored way to go out would be taking my executioners with me. Put us all in a ring gladiator-style with equal weapons and let us fight it out. I would go out, but I sure wouldn't be going alone!

Ah, yes. Oops. Well my point is it would only take out Rhode Island not the world.
Well, I'm already in Rhode Island, so it makes it that much simpler.

I'd like to be executed by having a nuclear missile detonate three feet away from me. This should also be the most powerful nuclear missile ever created. And I shall be in Antarctica. So I'll be taking most of the coastal cities of the world with me and probably millions more from the environmental after effects. You people wanted to execute me? Well you can fuck yourselves while you're at it :p

might as well go with crucifixion...just because

Microwaved.

Bullet to the head. Quick, and you're out before you know what's goin' on. XD

lethal injection, easy. That looks comfy:)

Old Age. No no, don't grieve for me. I shall endure Time's harsh ravages to atone for my crimes.

Ugh, I could never do lethal injection. [shudder.] That stuff is painful, apparently.

Ugh, I could never do lethal injection. [shudder.] That stuff is painful, apparently.

How do they know?

How do they know?

Maybe there's a very short survey?

I'd like to be executed by having a nuclear missile detonate three feet away from me. This should also be the most powerful nuclear missile ever created. And I shall be in Antarctica. So I'll be taking most of the coastal cities of the world with me and probably millions more from the environmental after effects. You people wanted to execute me? Well you can fuck yourselves while you're at it :pSpeaking of fucking yourself, did I mention my preferred method of execution....?:eek:

I would want to be executed by being hurled inexorably into the heart of the Sun on a very well-appointed, luxurious space-yacht. On a voyage that takes a bit longer than expected to complete, but has no impact on ship's stores. Say, twenty years longer than expected.

Hmm... I'd say, shot in the head, unexpectedly. The worst part of execution is waiting, knowing that you're gonna die.

Death by sexual exhustion.

Poisoned cake.
I think poisoned women would be better. Or just having sex wayyyyyy too much. :p

EDIT: Damn the guy above me got it first:headbang:

Firing squad. It's just quite a romantic notion.:p

firing squad, quik and painless and you can look your killers in the eye.

The poor electric chair feels left out. :(

The poor electric chair feels left out. :(

Sexual exhaustian, while using the chair.:eek:

The poor electric chair feels left out. :(
Maybe if there was an electric La Z Boy..

I'm going to go for firing squad to..

I would say death by stoning, provided I get to have some munchies between bong hits.:p

My personal choice would be to take the French route for once.

Firing squad, but untied, so I can moon them.

Hmm...they'd better be a professional bunch or I know exactly where they'd aim...

Apparently, you see pretty colours when you drown, hmm..

Apparently, you see pretty colours when you drown, hmm..
And apparently a hanging man hears beautiful music...

I would be chases off a cliff by naked women, like in Monty Pyhton's The Meaning Of LIfe.


Sorry, but execution and death are such funny topics that I just couldn't resist.
Agreed that looked like a good way to go

I was going to post a pic but not sure there are any in that sketch (that would make it recognizeable) that dont have certian body parts showing that would get me in trouble

Decapatated by the sword. I dunno just seems better than anything else i can think of, except maybe coming off a quadbike at 90mph into a concrete wall, that might be fun.

I want to be licked to death by kittens.

Decapatated by the sword. I dunno just seems better than anything else i can think of, except maybe coming off a quadbike at 90mph into a concrete wall, that might be fun.

Except the quadbike method does'nt always kill you..... re Ozzy Osbourne

I quite fancy the 10Kg of anti-mtter method, Ok we can dispute how much of the surrounding countryside will be vapourised, but hey the flash will be seen for 1000 miles in all directions.....:eek:

Either that or old age .... yupp definetly prefer old age now..... except if I go senile :headbang:

Agreed that looked like a good way to go

I was going to post a pic but not sure there are any in that sketch (that would make it recognizeable) that dont have certian body parts showing that would get me in trouble
http://i12.photobucket.com/albums/a250/RikiOhh/Der%20Sinn%20des%20Lebens/30b99fd0.jpg

Death by crushed pelvis, like in Futurama, except not with huge amazonian women.

Failing that, firing squad it is


me :mp5:

Death by crushed pelvis, like in Futurama, except not with huge amazonian women.

Failing that, firing squad it is


me :mp5:
I would prefer:
[me] :sniper: .

So they have something to bury.

http://i12.photobucket.com/albums/a250/RikiOhh/Der%20Sinn%20des%20Lebens/30b99fd0.jpg
:fluffle: :fluffle:

Why thank you!

A clear win for the firing squad then?