NationStates Jolt Archive


If you were going to be executed

ConscribedComradeship
13-04-2006, 23:35
If you were going to be executed, heaven forbid, which method of execution would you pick? Please be honest and serious.
Dude111
13-04-2006, 23:36
If you were going to be executed, heaven forbid, which method of execution would you pick? Please be honest and serious.
I would be chases off a cliff by naked women, like in Monty Pyhton's The Meaning Of LIfe.


Sorry, but execution and death are such funny topics that I just couldn't resist.
ConscribedComradeship
13-04-2006, 23:37
I would be chases off a cliff by naked women, like in Monty Pyhton's The Meaning Of LIfe.


Sorry, but execution and death are such funny topics that I just couldn't resist.

lol.
Frangland
13-04-2006, 23:38
Decapitation -- probably wouldn't feel a thing.
Pythogria
13-04-2006, 23:39
Firing Squad. relatively painless.
Exomnia
13-04-2006, 23:39
Oh crap, I said lethal injection. On second thought, I want to be chased off a cliff by toppless women. :D
CthulhuFhtagn
13-04-2006, 23:41
Death by 10 kg of anti-hydrogen. If I go out, the rest of you fuckers are coming with me.
Exomnia
13-04-2006, 23:43
Death by 10 kg of anti-hydrogen. If I go out, the rest of you fuckers are coming with me.
Us fuckers, as you say, would be fine. By my calculations 10 kg of antimatter would be equivalent to about 309.915579 megatons of TNT. There are nuclear bombs bigger than that.
Dude111
13-04-2006, 23:45
Decapitation -- probably wouldn't feel a thing.
Or you could suffer in agony for several minutes while still conscious. I heard roaches can live up to 3 weeks without their bodies, you know.
Burliness
13-04-2006, 23:47
I think it'd be cool to be sentenced to death by explosion. I just can't imagine a manlier way out.
Frangland
13-04-2006, 23:49
i'm not talking about getting my head sawed off... i'm talking about an axe or a guillotine... have it lopped right off.

could we possibly feel pain without a head?
Kleptonis
13-04-2006, 23:49
I would be chases off a cliff by naked women, like in Monty Pyhton's The Meaning Of LIfe.


Sorry, but execution and death are such funny topics that I just couldn't resist.
There's only one problem with it being an execution method - "Why would you run?"
Undelia
13-04-2006, 23:49
Firing squad. Die on your feet.
Duntscruwithus
13-04-2006, 23:50
Lethal injection, I am too lazy to die on my feet.
Drunk commies deleted
13-04-2006, 23:51
I guess they could knock me out with alcohol and valium then administer a lethal dose of heroin.
[NS]Liasia
13-04-2006, 23:51
If you had the choice between a painful and lengthy death or a short painless one, which would you take?
The only catch is, if you choose a short and painless the executioner slips his finger into your arse while he does it, and you are fully aware of it.

(apoligies to ricky gervais, from whom i stole this from)
Krakozha
13-04-2006, 23:51
Would have to be lethal injection, as long as they knock me out. The other methods are either not as quick and painless (as long as you're unconsious), and most of them have a degree of human error attached - firing squad might miss everything important, no matter how many of them there are, and leave to to bleed to death in the dirt, hanging might end up with a rope not quite long enough to kill you instantly and end up strangling you to death, decapitation leaves the brain alive for anywhere up to four minutes (but it usually dies within the first minute), as you feel the blood draining from your severed head, stoning can take ages to kill you, unless the first on is thrown by a really big guy with flawless aim and a killer arm straight at your head and electric chair doesn't kill you imediately, but causes short term incredible pain. Anyone ever get shocked by someting other than static? I grabbed an electric fence once, while it was on and my arm hurt and my muscles spasmed for hours!
CthulhuFhtagn
13-04-2006, 23:51
Us fuckers, as you say, would be fine. By my calculations 10 kg of antimatter would be equivalent to about 309.915579 megatons of TNT. There are nuclear bombs bigger than that.
Hold on, give me a minute. It's 3.6 X 10^18 Joules of energy. One joule will raise a 1 kg weight ten centimeters. I think this is more than ~310 megatons. And this is discounting the massive amounts of radiation released.

Also, the most powerful nuclear weapon ever tested wasn't even 100 megatons, if I remember correctly.
ConscribedComradeship
13-04-2006, 23:52
Liasia']If you had the choice between a painful and lengthy death or a short painless one, which would you take?
The only catch is, if you choose a short and painless the executioner slips his finger into your arse while he does it, and you are fully aware of it.

(apoligies to ricky gervais, from whom i stole this from)

Short and painless with the executioner violating my anus.
Kamsaki
13-04-2006, 23:54
In mortal combat with my would-be executors. Duh.
Call to power
14-04-2006, 00:03
In mortal combat with my would-be executors. Duh.

I love your self-confidence

I myself would prefer death by age a long and torturous death involving kids, a wife and dare I say it bills!
ConscribedComradeship
14-04-2006, 00:03
In mortal combat with my would-be executors. Duh.
But would they be would-be executioners? :confused:
Total Awesome
14-04-2006, 00:04
Decapitation. Preferably in public so that people hear why I'm being killed, like in the good old days, and without the executioner's finger up my butt, kthxbi.
Smunkeeville
14-04-2006, 00:06
I chose decapitation provided that it was done with a guillotine, and the blade was properly balanced and very sharp, I don't think I would like getting my head halfway cut off. ;)
Asbena
14-04-2006, 00:07
In combat....like a true samurai!
Kamsaki
14-04-2006, 00:10
But would they be would-be executioners? :confused:
Some of them would be would-be executioners. Others would be executioners, not would-be executioners.

Heck, if I just sit there, I get killed however they want to do it. At least if I fight my way out they kill me on my terms.
Dude111
14-04-2006, 00:10
There's only one problem with it being an execution method - "Why would you run?"
That, my good friend, is one of life's mysteries...
Asbena
14-04-2006, 00:12
That, my good friend, is one of life's mysteries...
Cause you don't want to die?
Ricky D
14-04-2006, 00:19
I chose stoning because hopefully if I'm being executed it was for something really bad (or martyrdom) and I want it to be as painful and frightening as possible. Of the choices I think having rocks hurled at me was the best.
Exomnia
14-04-2006, 00:21
Hold on, give me a minute. It's 3.6 X 10^18 Joules of energy. One joule will raise a 1 kg weight ten centimeters. I think this is more than ~310 megatons. And this is discounting the massive amounts of radiation released.

Also, the most powerful nuclear weapon ever tested wasn't even 100 megatons, if I remember correctly.
10 kg * c^2 = 8.98755179 × 10^17 J
1 megaton of TNT = 4.184 × 10^15 J
8.98755179 × 10^17 J / 4.184 × 10^15 J = 214.807643
So I messed up a little bit (I don't know why).

Anyways thats assuming all of the antimatter turns into kinetic or other destructive energy. It is estimated that 60% of the energy turns into harmless neutrinos (acording to wikipedia). That means that it is more like 85.9230572 Megatons of TNT. By comparison the Tsar bomb (the largest ever detonated) was 57 megatons, roughly twice as powerful. Quite powerful, but not powerful enough to destory all us fuckers.
CthulhuFhtagn
14-04-2006, 00:24
10 kg * c^2 = 8.98755179 × 10^17 J
1 megaton of TNT = 4.184 × 10^15 J
8.98755179 × 10^17 J / 4.184 × 10^15 J = 214.807643
So I messed up a little bit (I don't know why).

Anyways thats assuming all of the antimatter turns into kinetic or other destructive energy. It is estimated that 60% of the energy turns into harmless neutrinos (acording to wikipedia). That means that it is more like 85.9230572 Megatons of TNT. By comparison the Tsar bomb (the largest ever detonated) was 57 megatons, roughly twice as powerful. Quite powerful, but not powerful enough to destory all us fuckers.
It's double that. You forgot that matter is annihlated as well.
Azarbad
14-04-2006, 00:27
firing squad, with an GAU-8 Avenger off an A-10 warthog...all 1350 rounds in the belt please. If not, a regular old 12 men at dawn style is good too.

Death by being fed into a fully spooled up turbofan sounds cool too. (quickly fed I mean, let the intake suction just carry me in at full speed)
DrunkenDove
14-04-2006, 00:34
Firing squad would be alright. Especially if the squad are armed with something ludicrous like RPGs or Miniguns, or if the squad are all dressed like clowns or something.
ConscribedComradeship
14-04-2006, 00:36
I really do think that firing squad has to be the most humane method of execution.
Terrorist Cakes
14-04-2006, 00:37
Poisoned cake.
Boonytopia
14-04-2006, 00:40
Firing squad. Get it over & done with. I'd also like to look my executioners in the eye.
Kamsaki
14-04-2006, 00:42
I love your self-confidence
I think the chances are reasonable that if I'm going to be executed, it will be by someone I don't want to execute me. Once that much is settled, the method of eventual death becomes obvious; fight like hell unleashed.
Exomnia
14-04-2006, 02:28
It's double that. You forgot that matter is annihlated as well.
Ah, yes. Oops. Well my point is it would only take out Rhode Island not the world.
Southern Sovereignty
14-04-2006, 02:49
I chose firing squad. Why? Because, I want to go out in dignity and honor, not hung, injected, or shocked as a common criminal; decapitated as a traitor to "Mother Europe" (it seemed to be the favorite form of execution among Europe's monarchs); and certainly not chased off a cliff by naked women!

However, I think my favored way to go out would be taking my executioners with me. Put us all in a ring gladiator-style with equal weapons and let us fight it out. I would go out, but I sure wouldn't be going alone!
CthulhuFhtagn
14-04-2006, 03:09
Ah, yes. Oops. Well my point is it would only take out Rhode Island not the world.
Well, I'm already in Rhode Island, so it makes it that much simpler.
Free Farmers
14-04-2006, 04:02
I'd like to be executed by having a nuclear missile detonate three feet away from me. This should also be the most powerful nuclear missile ever created. And I shall be in Antarctica. So I'll be taking most of the coastal cities of the world with me and probably millions more from the environmental after effects. You people wanted to execute me? Well you can fuck yourselves while you're at it :p
Zilam
14-04-2006, 04:50
might as well go with crucifixion...just because
Kanabia
14-04-2006, 05:07
Microwaved.
Kjralon
14-04-2006, 05:10
Bullet to the head. Quick, and you're out before you know what's goin' on. XD
The UN abassadorship
14-04-2006, 05:54
lethal injection, easy. That looks comfy:)
Megaloria
14-04-2006, 05:59
Old Age. No no, don't grieve for me. I shall endure Time's harsh ravages to atone for my crimes.
Kjralon
14-04-2006, 06:00
Ugh, I could never do lethal injection. [shudder.] That stuff is painful, apparently.
DrunkenDove
14-04-2006, 06:02
Ugh, I could never do lethal injection. [shudder.] That stuff is painful, apparently.

How do they know?
Megaloria
14-04-2006, 06:07
How do they know?

Maybe there's a very short survey?
THE LOST PLANET
14-04-2006, 07:08
I'd like to be executed by having a nuclear missile detonate three feet away from me. This should also be the most powerful nuclear missile ever created. And I shall be in Antarctica. So I'll be taking most of the coastal cities of the world with me and probably millions more from the environmental after effects. You people wanted to execute me? Well you can fuck yourselves while you're at it :pSpeaking of fucking yourself, did I mention my preferred method of execution....?:eek:
Dobbsworld
14-04-2006, 08:00
I would want to be executed by being hurled inexorably into the heart of the Sun on a very well-appointed, luxurious space-yacht. On a voyage that takes a bit longer than expected to complete, but has no impact on ship's stores. Say, twenty years longer than expected.
Kievan-Prussia
14-04-2006, 08:13
Hmm... I'd say, shot in the head, unexpectedly. The worst part of execution is waiting, knowing that you're gonna die.
Egg and chips
14-04-2006, 10:03
Death by sexual exhustion.
Hobovillia
14-04-2006, 10:16
Poisoned cake.
I think poisoned women would be better. Or just having sex wayyyyyy too much. :p

EDIT: Damn the guy above me got it first:headbang:
Saxnot
14-04-2006, 10:45
Firing squad. It's just quite a romantic notion.:p
Evil little boys
14-04-2006, 10:53
firing squad, quik and painless and you can look your killers in the eye.
ConscribedComradeship
14-04-2006, 11:06
The poor electric chair feels left out. :(
Big Jim P
14-04-2006, 11:15
The poor electric chair feels left out. :(

Sexual exhaustian, while using the chair.:eek:
Zero Six Three
14-04-2006, 12:41
The poor electric chair feels left out. :(
Maybe if there was an electric La Z Boy..

I'm going to go for firing squad to..
PasturePastry
14-04-2006, 12:49
I would say death by stoning, provided I get to have some munchies between bong hits.:p
Mariehamn
14-04-2006, 12:50
My personal choice would be to take the French route for once.
I V Stalin
14-04-2006, 13:09
Firing squad, but untied, so I can moon them.

Hmm...they'd better be a professional bunch or I know exactly where they'd aim...
ConscribedComradeship
14-04-2006, 13:25
Apparently, you see pretty colours when you drown, hmm..
I V Stalin
14-04-2006, 13:32
Apparently, you see pretty colours when you drown, hmm..
And apparently a hanging man hears beautiful music...
UpwardThrust
14-04-2006, 13:34
I would be chases off a cliff by naked women, like in Monty Pyhton's The Meaning Of LIfe.


Sorry, but execution and death are such funny topics that I just couldn't resist.
Agreed that looked like a good way to go

I was going to post a pic but not sure there are any in that sketch (that would make it recognizeable) that dont have certian body parts showing that would get me in trouble
Cheese penguins
14-04-2006, 13:35
Decapatated by the sword. I dunno just seems better than anything else i can think of, except maybe coming off a quadbike at 90mph into a concrete wall, that might be fun.
Hakartopia
14-04-2006, 13:39
I want to be licked to death by kittens.
Cypresaria
14-04-2006, 13:41
Decapatated by the sword. I dunno just seems better than anything else i can think of, except maybe coming off a quadbike at 90mph into a concrete wall, that might be fun.

Except the quadbike method does'nt always kill you..... re Ozzy Osbourne

I quite fancy the 10Kg of anti-mtter method, Ok we can dispute how much of the surrounding countryside will be vapourised, but hey the flash will be seen for 1000 miles in all directions.....:eek:

Either that or old age .... yupp definetly prefer old age now..... except if I go senile :headbang:
I V Stalin
14-04-2006, 13:48
Agreed that looked like a good way to go

I was going to post a pic but not sure there are any in that sketch (that would make it recognizeable) that dont have certian body parts showing that would get me in trouble
http://i12.photobucket.com/albums/a250/RikiOhh/Der%20Sinn%20des%20Lebens/30b99fd0.jpg
Potato jack
14-04-2006, 14:16
Death by crushed pelvis, like in Futurama, except not with huge amazonian women.

Failing that, firing squad it is


me :mp5:
ConscribedComradeship
14-04-2006, 14:23
Death by crushed pelvis, like in Futurama, except not with huge amazonian women.

Failing that, firing squad it is


me :mp5:
I would prefer:
[me] :sniper: .

So they have something to bury.
UpwardThrust
14-04-2006, 14:25
http://i12.photobucket.com/albums/a250/RikiOhh/Der%20Sinn%20des%20Lebens/30b99fd0.jpg
:fluffle: :fluffle:

Why thank you!
ConscribedComradeship
14-04-2006, 15:33
A clear win for the firing squad then?