NationStates Jolt Archive

Ok, heres the scenario: earlier today, I left my phone on the bus. Tis a crappy Nokia thing, but its prepaid and I just put $100 on it. So anyway, as soon as I got off the bus I realised, I went after the thing but couldnt catch up. The depot isnt far from my house, and I knew it would turn around and come back, so I went to the other side of the road and waited, to see if it was there or if someone had handed it in. Nobody had.

So I got off the bus, and as I was going back home I got really, really angry. REALLY angry. I found a piece if PVC tubing on the way home and broke it in half, over my knee (which really hurts now). After I got home I found a shovel, went to the park just next to my house and almost beat down a tree with it. Then I just burst into tears right there and couldnt stop for about 20 minutes.

As if that wasn't enough, I'm normally the calmest, most "meh" person you'll ever meet. So why on earth did it happen? I've lost crap before, wallets, bags, even an impossible-to-replace letter from my now-dead father. But I've never done anything like this before.

Thoughts?

<snipzors>
Hmmm.....sounds like it's possible that it's just an outward manifestation of stresses that've merely been building up.....do you take any yoga classes or anything of the sort that helps you get the everyday things out? Doesn't sound to me like the kind of thing that happened over just a cell phone.

sounds like there's more going on with you than a lost phone. my sister lost her phone a few months ago. it was brand new and she lost it on my 21st birthday at a club. she was crying for hours but there was definitely more upsetting her than just a missing phone even if she won't admit it.

My guess? Your not doing anything over those past annoyances finally built up enough to do what you did.

I don't do any Yoga or anything like that, no. I suppose that could be it, but I've pretty much pulled out of my depressive slide that I had the last year or so, I thought I was fine... obviously not.

Well, someone called me from the phone, saying they just found it on the side of the street... im not going to even bother with hopw they found it there... and I feel better, but I am still scared by my little outburst.

Well, someone called me from the phone, saying they just found it on the side of the street... im not going to even bother with hopw they found it there... and I feel better, but I am still scared by my little outburst.
It's natural for something to explode when too much pressure builds. Personally, I'd suggest you find a way to regularly relax and just let out stress, even if you don't actually feel stressed, because things can pile up quickly. I know, 'cause I used to have explosive outbursts all the time, over the tiniest things, but now I put aside time twice a week for a half-hour bubble bath and listening to classical music. Anything you enjoy, as long as it's quiet and settling, will help with that.

Its called a snap.

Its called a snap.

Judging by the Bowser thread, that's something you're already familiar with. :p

Simonist']It's natural for something to explode when too much pressure builds. Personally, I'd suggest you find a way to regularly relax and just let out stress, even if you don't actually feel stressed, because things can pile up quickly. I know, 'cause I used to have explosive outbursts all the time, over the tiniest things, but now I put aside time twice a week for a half-hour bubble bath and listening to classical music. Anything you enjoy, as long as it's quiet and settling, will help with that.

But I spend the majority of my time doing what I enjoy... TV, music (sometimes classical), reading, walking my dog... like I said, I am normally a very relaxed guy. Or maybe I just supress all the crap. Its possible I spose.

EDIT- What a thread to get my 400th.

Thoughts?

Uhh... Don't own a gun?

Nah, seriously, it happens to the best of us. When I was a kid I would flip out all the time and get really angry. Now I'm really cool, calm and collected, but I still have my angry moments.

But I spend the majority of my time doing what I enjoy... TV, music (sometimes classical), reading, walking my dog... like I said, I am normally a very relaxed guy. Or maybe I just supress all the crap. Its possible I spose.When I have a good time for myself, I don't really have any worries. As soon as I get into a nasty enough situation however, or something otherwise reminds me enough, all that has built up over the recent years surface, and I end up in a state where it wouldn't take too much for me to snap. When you don't even think about it, you don't deal with it. Given enough time, it will still weaken, but not if it keeps building up.

When I have a good time for myself, I don't really have any worries. As soon as I get into a nasty enough situation however, or something otherwise reminds me enough, all that has built up over the recent years surface, and I end up in a state where it wouldn't take too much for me to snap. When you don't even think about it, you don't deal with it. Given enough time, it will still weaken, but not if it keeps building up.

Fair enough I spose.

Got any ideas about ways to stop it building up?

I really would like some more responses, so I suppose this is a a bump.

Fair enough I spose.

Got any ideas about ways to stop it building up?

Does this happen regularly? Like, say, once a month, give or take a few days?

I'm no doctor but I precribe tickling.

Does this happen regularly? Like, say, once a month, give or take a few days?
Lol im pretty sure this is a guy...

Yep, male. Sorry.

But just in case you were being serious (which with a name like Quagmus I find hard to believe) no, first time ever.

And I give as good as I get as far as tickling goes. Still fun though:p

Got any ideas about ways to stop it building up?When something happens, make sure to deal with it throughoutly. Not that it's always easy to know when you have done so or not...

Just need to channel your rage a bit. I'm a very calm person, but once in a while something just pisses me off so much I need to hit something.

Last time it was a steel cased door, hit it hard enough to leave a row of dents where my knuckles hit. Had a wicked bruise too.

Sounds like it wasn't really about the cell phone...maybe it subconsciously represented something else going on in your life. Have you considered talking to a counselor?

He doesn't need to see a shrink, he'll be just fine continuing the glorious male tradition of not admitting we have any emotions and suppressing everything except the rage.

Oh and don't go admittin to the cryin bit.


Yes I'm being mostly sarcastic, I don't think he needs a shrink though, just a bit more self awareness and stress coping.

Everyone loses it occassionally. Often the big stuff doesn't effect you but then you do something small, drop a glass, and you break up. Strange but there it is.

Yes I'm being mostly sarcastic, I don't think he needs a shrink though, just a bit more self awareness and stress coping.
he was self aware of coping with his stress by taking a shovel to a tree. how much more do you need?

It's called "the straw that broke the camel's back." You had a great deal of pressure, almost more than you could handle without losing it. You then lost the cell phone, and it was that one little thing that shoved you right on over into angryville.

Just chop down a tree with a shovel and move on.

It's called "the straw that broke the camel's back." You had a great deal of pressure, almost more than you could handle without losing it. You then lost the cell phone, and it was that one little thing that shoved you right on over into angryville.

Just chop down a tree with a shovel and move on.

Done. Only thing is, I honestly didnt think there was a whole lot of pressure. Probably was, but who knows.

And I hate the idea of counsellors. They are silly, over paid people who just ask questions and give no answers. Which is why I want to become one.

Thoughts?

You should go into a fast-food resturant with an Uzi at 11:35 and order breakfast.

Thoughts?
Usually when someone reacts that way to what would normally be a rather small thing, it's for one of two primary reasons:

* An accumulation of small frustrations that build up over time, and the triggering incident was the "straw that broke the camel's back."

* The incident feels like betrayal, in this case because someone obviously violated your trust in human nature by keeping the phone.

Either way, it's nothing to be overly concerned about. You might think about learning more coping skills so you can deal with things before they reach this point.

Done. Only thing is, I honestly didnt think there was a whole lot of pressure. Probably was, but who knows.

And I hate the idea of counsellors. They are silly, over paid people who just ask questions and give no answers. Which is why I want to become one.You could have been repressing it and your subconscious came back at you. I had something similar happen on a class trip where someone cut in line in front of me and pushed me when I protested. I ended up crying for half an hour instead of having dinner. That act of unkindness just brought so much bullying I had been swallowing over the years to surface; I didn't really cry because of a small piece of injustice.

You could have been repressing it and your subconscious came back at you. I had something similar happen on a class trip where someone cut in line in front of me and pushed me when I protested. I ended up crying for half an hour instead of having dinner. That act of unkindness just brought so much bullying I had been swallowing over the years to surface; I didn't really cry because of a small piece of injustice.

Hmmm...