NationStates Jolt Archive

A battle of the gods...the two most worshipped beings of the internet in a battle to the death.

In one corner, the creator of the world, the being whose noodly appendage permeates all reality (and conveniently falsifies radiocarbon testing), the one, the only, the FSM!

http://oc.metblogs.com/archives/fsm.jpg

In the other corner, master of the roundhouse kick, the man whose tears cure cancer (but has never cried), Chucktator of the American Chucktatorship, Chuck Norris!

http://www.monkeyview.net/id/2470/default/Chuck_Norris.jpg

A simple, no holds barred battle to the death. Who would win?

Poll coming.

Chuck Norris doesn't stand a chance. The FSM has the combined strength of the midgets. They are his chosen people.

Chuck Norris doesn't stand a chance. The FSM has the combined strength of the midgets. They are his chosen people.

Them and the pirates.

Chuck Norris doesn't stand a chance. Ever try getting spaghetti sauce out of your beard? Even if Chuck 'defeated' FSM with a roundhouse kick, his uncontrollable urge to dine on spaghetti and meatballs would be his own undoing...

Yah! The Flying spaghetti monster is the ultimate beeing. He would kick Chuck Norris's ass back to 1975. :) GO FSM GO!

BTW: If you want beer and strippers when you die, convert to Pastafarianism!

face it people, despite the undoubtable coolness of Chuck Norris, and the fact that he was taught by the true God: Bruce Lee, FSM could easily take him out with his noodly appendage

Psh. They're both losers compared to the might of Unicron.

Psh. They're both losers compared to the might of Unicron.

http://stealthboy.dyndns.org/~msherman/images/unicron.jpg

Neither, both are stupid.

Perhaps if Chuck Norris used Ran as a distraction... as seen here (http://bobandgeorge.com/Archive/Apr06.php?date=3) he would have to escape and gather reinforcements consisting of Mr. T and Odin the Allfather.

Them and the pirates.

especially midget pirates.
and captain hampton.
AQUABATS ROOLZ!!!

No, no, no, Mr. Rogers of course!!! In a blood-stained sweater.

Neither, both are stupid.
I'm not sure if I'd say stupid. More like: "They're both the lamest goddamn things to come from the Internet, and everyone who talks about them (or talks about someone who talks about them) in a way that is approving in any sense sucks donkey cocks for spare change every Friday night."
Yeah, that seems so much more appropriate.

I'm not sure if I'd say stupid. More like: "They're both the lamest goddamn things to come from the Internet, and everyone who talks about them (or talks about someone who talks about them) in a way that is approving in any sense sucks donkey cocks for spare change every Friday night."
Yeah, that seems so much more appropriate.

Where do donkeys get spare change?

Where do donkeys get spare change?

They've got ass-loads of change.

No, no, no, Mr. Rogers of course!!! In a blood-stained sweater.

Ah, what a great movie/song

Where do donkeys get spare change?
I always assumed that other people were paying to have their donkeys sucked off for spare change, it was more a matter of local diction in my hometown than anything else.

Obviously, Mr. T would pity them both into submission easily.

What about Dunkelheit?

They've got ass-loads of change.
"ass-loads" !!! that's rich, rich like my colon after big bowl of raisin bran.
Chuck all the way, if he already got by Mr. Rogers of course.

I'm not a Chuck Norris fan, but he'd still win. All he'd have to do is close his eyes and say "there is no Flying Spaghetti Monster" and the hallucination would go away. Right?

I'm not a Chuck Norris fan, but he'd still win. All he'd have to do is close his eyes and say "there is no Flying Spaghetti Monster" and the hallucination would go away. Right?


Wrong. Even if Chuck Norris thought the FSM wasn't there, that would actually be the result of The Spaghedeity noodling around with Norris's brain with one of His multitudinous Noodly Appendages. Norris would thus be lulled into a false sense of security, and would not expect the noodle-whipping that would ensue, slapping the beloved Texas Ranger clear into next Thursday.

Psh. They're both losers compared to the might of Unicron.

We've been through this before. The Invisible Green Dragon and His consort, the Invisible Pink Unicorn, gave birth to our savior, the Flying Spaghetti Monster. This whole IPU vs. FSM debate makes Them sad. We shouldn't be fighting each other, it is the Christians who are the enemy! Christianity just preverted the truth and made us their trinity nonsense, to cover up the fact that they are a cannibalistic bunch of egomanicacs who have to insist that they are perfect, i.e. god looks like us. When Dragons, Unicorns, and Flying Spaghetti Monsters are clearly much better designs and all in all much more impressive than a Jewish hippie carpenter. Think about it. Who would eat the body and blood of somebody? Gross! Now, eating spaghetti and marinara sauce- not gross.

especially midget pirates.
and captain hampton.
AQUABATS ROOLZ!!!

Excellent point.

Don't forget the Pirates Who Don't Do Anything, either. Or the ones from ELP's "Pirates".

We've been through this before. The Invisible Green Dragon and His consort, the Invisible Pink Unicorn, gave birth to our savior, the Flying Spaghetti Monster. This whole IPU vs. FSM debate makes Them sad. We shouldn't be fighting each other, it is the Christians who are the enemy! Christianity just preverted the truth and made us their trinity nonsense, to cover up the fact that they are a cannibalistic bunch of egomanicacs who have to insist that they are perfect, i.e. god looks like us. When Dragons, Unicorns, and Flying Spaghetti Monsters are clearly much better designs and all in all much more impressive than a Jewish hippie carpenter. Think about it. Who would eat the body and blood of somebody? Gross! Now, eating spaghetti and marinara sauce- not gross.

Yeah, you keep telling yourself that when the Chaos Bringer crushes this puny planet in His Most Terrible Maw.

Also, I think you may have mistaken my spelling of Unicron for dyslexia.

Midgets & Pirates. An unstoppable combination.

I'm not sure if I'd say stupid. More like: "They're both the lamest goddamn things to come from the Internet, and everyone who talks about them (or talks about someone who talks about them) in a way that is approving in any sense sucks donkey cocks for spare change every Friday night."
Yeah, that seems so much more appropriate.

Tsk. The original idea behind the FSM, to show the hypocrisy and mockery of science advocated by ID proponents, is quite worthy of praise in my opinion.

One can argue the joke has gone too far and is getting old now - but what should it be replaced with ?

And to link this to the main topic: FSM has purpose. Norris has not. Ramen.

FSM.

Fuck Chuck.