NationStates Jolt Archive

Is it true that a sizeable number of men and women fantasise about raping, or being raped?

I just can't understand it. How can sex (even imaginary sex) be enjoyable if it's not (imagined to be) consensual?

To quote google:
Results 1 - 10 of about 8,960,000 for rape fantasy.

So I guess the answer to your first question is "yes".

Is it true that a sizeable number of men and women fantasise about raping, or being raped?

I just can't understand it. How can sex be enjoyable if it's not consensual?
Yes. I dream of beeing raped by a dozen female swimsuit models.

Is it true that a sizeable number of men and women fantasise about raping, or being raped?

I just can't understand it. How can sex be enjoyable if it's not consensual?
depends... for the raper, its a power trip. being dominate. especially if in Real Life, that person isn't.

for the Rapee, it can be the feeling of helplessness... of being under someone elses control. again in RL it can be opposite to what they really are.

then there is the whole possible lure of the violence itself. sado machoistic, self destructiveness...

and it's not just rape, but also Domination/Submissive, Slave/Master, Bondage/Disipline.

(guess what my pysch paper was on...)

Is it true that a sizeable number of men and women fantasise about raping, or being raped?

I just can't understand it. How can sex be enjoyable if it's not consensual?
Yeah, but if it's only a fantasy it's not actually non-consensual. You're still totally in control of the situation and not in any danger and it's just like an extreme form of submission.

Can't say I find the idea appealing myself... but liking the fantasy is very different to actually liking the reality.

Is it true that a sizeable number of men and women fantasise about raping, or being raped?

I just can't understand it. How can sex (even imaginary sex) be enjoyable if it's not (imagined to be) consensual?
Question solved by googlefight as always

http://www.googlefight.com/index.php?lang=en_GB&word1=rape&word2=consensual

Yeah, but if it's only a fantasy it's not actually non-consensual. You're still totally in control of the situation and not in any danger and it's just like an extreme form of submission.

Can't say I find the idea appealing myself... but liking the fantasy is very different to actually liking the reality.
yep. but the danger is when the lines start blurring. that's when the person doing the fantasising needs to stop and re-establish the bounderies.

I think most people who have rape fantasies don't actually understand rape, and don't understand that it's actually taking someone's control over their body, and basically making them feel like less than a person, instead of just "well, I don't wanna have sex with you." I think they fail to underestimate what, exactly, is wrong with rape, just as many people who don't know any rape victims tend to do.

Can a person with Multiple Personality Disorder effectively rape him or herself?

thought id be clever pointing out you spelt consensual wrong in google fight.
but turns out results are pretty much the same... rape beats it by 8-1

Can a person with Multiple Personality Disorder effectively rape him or herself?

also would a cannibal eat him/her self

thought id be clever pointing out you spelt consensual wrong in google fight.
but turns out results are pretty much the same... rape beats it by 8-1
Check the link fixed before you posted

Can a person with Multiple Personality Disorder effectively rape him or herself?
well, there was a case where a guy was accused of rape because he didn't get the concent of his girlfriend's "Other Personalities"

and there was another case where one personality was pregnant but another gave birth... leading her to believe she had an immaculate conception...

Check the link fixed before you posted

sorry was writing at the time
my rape victims always complain im too fast.

*oversteps the mark*

sorry

Question solved by googlefight as always

http://www.googlefight.com/index.php?lang=en_GB&word1=rape&word2=consensual

Case closed :D

Googlefight is the final word. Googlefight pwns you.

lived through it, try not to think about it anymore if I don't have to.

although I doubt it's abnormal to think about it....I don't think there really are that many "abnormal" things to think about sexually, just some unusual things (if that makes sense) although there are a lot of things people do/think about doing that make me want to vomit, and rape is one of those.

Is it true that a sizeable number of men and women fantasise about raping, or being raped?

I just can't understand it. How can sex (even imaginary sex) be enjoyable if it's not (imagined to be) consensual?
I've known several women who had fantasies about being raped, but in almost every one of them, it was idealized into something to which I wouldn't refer as "rape." More like being "forced" to do what they wanted to do in the first place. I consider it harmless.

Is it even possible to fantasise about being raped? Surely desiring to be raped indicates a desire for your hypothetical rapist? Thus consent to sex with them.

Is it even possible to fantasise about being raped? Surely desiring to be raped indicates a desire for your hypothetical rapist? Thus consent to sex with them.
It's usually a fantasy about being "raped" by some vaguely faceless man. Some women will arrange to have their "rape" fantasies acted out, by some prearranged role play with a man they know and/or trust.

...rape beats it by 8-1

Is that really surprising?

Googlefight is, of course, based on the results of searches. Now, fetishists are likely to specifically search for their particular fetish, be it rape, Bondage, Sub/Dom, whatever - and the sites they're looking for will advertise their contents as such. On the other hand, a normal porn/erotica site isn't terribly likely to include the word 'consensual' on their page, as it is unlikely to be included in a search.

I cannot offer a huge sample, only those I have known, but I have found a huge majority of British women to have rape fantisies and no women of other nationalities.

That said, it is likely that foriegn women percieve me to a Gentleman, whereas to English woman I appear to be a bit of rough.

My goodness, I feel self concious writing this.

I've known several women who had fantasies about being raped, but in almost every one of them, it was idealized into something to which I wouldn't refer as "rape." More like being "forced" to do what they wanted to do in the first place. I consider it harmless.

I agree.

I suspect it is common in women (Lack of experience means I cannot comment on what other men get up to) who like the idea of sex, but feel awkward about consenting to sex. They want sex, but are prudish about allowing themselves to be sexual. Therefore, in their fantasies such complications are put to the side but the choice being taken out of their hands. This is clearly very different to actually wanting to be raped, which is rarely if ever the case.

I've had rape fantasies too! I imagine being kidnapped by several large masked men and then.... well never mind about that. I wouldnt want it to actually happen though, unless maybe it was played out by people I trusted and was not actually harmed.

Question solved by googlefight as always

http://www.googlefight.com/index.php?lang=en_GB&word1=rape&word2=consensual
looks like the consensual man was totally raped...

I've had rape fantasies. Lots of women do. But as Eut pointed out, it's more of wanting to be 'forced' to do something you'd like to do anyway. You don't actually want to be brutalised, or terrified.

I've had rape fantasies. Lots of women do. But as Eut pointed out, it's more of wanting to be 'forced' to do something you'd like to do anyway. You don't actually want to be brutalised, or terrified.
but that's more Domination/Submissive than "rape".

I'd guess that there's almost no similarity between the fantasy and actual rape. Otherwise, the fantasizer is really sick.

people are nasty

there probably isnt anything that doesnt turn someone on, if only in their minds. fantasies are about getting a sexual charge. sometimes its thoughts of things that are dangerous or painful or flat out impossible.

quite often those darkest fantasies are things that you would not only not DARE to do but are things that if they happened in real life wouldnt turn you on at all.

I agree.

I suspect it is common in women (Lack of experience means I cannot comment on what other men get up to) who like the idea of sex, but feel awkward about consenting to sex. They want sex, but are prudish about allowing themselves to be sexual. Therefore, in their fantasies such complications are put to the side but the choice being taken out of their hands. This is clearly very different to actually wanting to be raped, which is rarely if ever the case.
Women who have actually been raped hardly ever have "rape fantasies." The reality is far too gruesome to have any illusions about it again.

people are nasty

there probably isnt anything that doesnt turn someone on, if only in their minds. fantasies are about getting a sexual charge. sometimes its thoughts of things that are dangerous or painful or flat out impossible.

quite often those darkest fantasies are things that you would not only not DARE to do but are things that if they happened in real life wouldnt turn you on at all.
Very true. That's essentially the same reason why lots of people like horror movies.

I've had rape fantasies too! I imagine being kidnapped by several large masked men and then.... well never mind about that. I wouldnt want it to actually happen though, unless maybe it was played out by people I trusted and was not actually harmed.

But if they were masked, how could you be sure that the people you trusted were the ones doing it? :D

but that's more Domination/Submissive than "rape".
Not the way I fantisise it. No details shall be forthcoming.

I've had rape fantasies. Lots of women do. But as Eut pointed out, it's more of wanting to be 'forced' to do something you'd like to do anyway. You don't actually want to be brutalised, or terrified.
Exactly. It's combining sexuality with the illusion of danger, a potent mixture. Danger and sex are linked somehow in our subconscious. There are numerous cases where men and women who have been through harrowing experiences together "fall in love."

But if they were masked, how could you be sure that the people you trusted were the ones doing it? :D
This reminds me of a story I heard a while back...a woman was grabbed off the street and forced into a van by three men, and police managed to save her and apprehend her would-be kidnappers. She was furious, because she'd paid a lot of money for this particular fantasy of hers to be played out:)

Not the way I fantisise it. No details shall be forthcoming.
LOL! Like the "struggle," do ya? :D

LOL! Like the "struggle," do ya? :D
Quit fishing:)

I've had rape fantasies. Lots of women do. But as Eut pointed out, it's more of wanting to be 'forced' to do something you'd like to do anyway. You don't actually want to be brutalised, or terrified.BTW my safe word is "Flüggåɘnkd€čhiœßølsên."

:D :D :cool: :D

Quit fishing:)
ROFLMAO! I suspect I know a bit too much about women to avoid doing so. ;)

Religion probably plays a big role in it. If one were to be "raped" by an attractive individual who was so irresistable that they could not help but become aroused, they could enjoy sex without "fornicating"

Religion probably plays a big role in it. If one were to be "raped" by an attractive individual who was so irresistable that they could not help but become aroused, they could enjoy sex without "fornicating"
Perhaps, although I've never personally encounterd any women where religion played any role in that. I will note, however, that one of the primary things in many women's "rape" fantasies is being "forced" to do things they would never dream of doing in real life. :D

BTW my safe word is "Flüggåɘnkd€čhiœßølsên."

:D :D :cool: :D
LOL! Uh huh. Make that word just as difficult to remember as possible. That'll fix em! :D

Religion probably plays a big role in it. If one were to be "raped" by an attractive individual who was so irresistable that they could not help but become aroused, they could enjoy sex without "fornicating"
This is why I think its unGodly and wrong. repent or be damned!

This is why I think its unGodly and wrong. repent or be damned!
What ...

... EVER! :rolleyes:

Yes. I dream of beeing raped by a dozen female swimsuit models.
If you're a guy then you're retarded. Guys can't be raped by women. Guys can only get raped by guys. Which is nasty in my personal opinion but if that's what you like. ::shrugs::

Btw, only joking about you liking that.

If you're a guy then you're retarded. Guys can't be raped by women. Guys can only get raped by guys. Which is nasty in my personal opinion but if that's what you like. ::shrugs::

Btw, only joking about you liking that.
Wow. So completely uniformed. Men absolutely CAN be raped by women. It's simply not as common as the other way around...but cripes...would you seriously say to a male rape victim, that his female attacker didn't actually do it because it's not possible?

What ...

... EVER! :rolleyes:
What?

If you're a guy then you're retarded. Guys can't be raped by women. Guys can only get raped by guys. Which is nasty in my personal opinion but if that's what you like.
Your the one who turns female swimsuit models into guys. Who's the retarted one?
Just for your information. Men actualy can be raped by women. It's not very well known. But it does happen.

What?
Ever.

Ever.
LOL! :D

Wow. So completely uniformed. Men absolutely CAN be raped by women. It's simply not as common as the other way around...but cripes...would you seriously say to a male rape victim, that his female attacker didn't actually do it because it's not possible?
I think he meant just with the body, not with other....objects.

Wow. So completely uniformed. Men absolutely CAN be raped by women. It's simply not as common as the other way around...but cripes...would you seriously say to a male rape victim, that his female attacker didn't actually do it because it's not possible?
If I was a woman I would be a dominatrix, and I would be totally into having male sex slaves. :)

As a guy, the idea of controlled "rape" in sex (me being the "victim") is hot. Another peculiarity of the gay mind.

This is why I think its unGodly and wrong. repent or be damned!
Shut up or be n00bed.

Ever.
I was just wondering why he said whatever to my post. but yeah, thanks for the help

I think he meant just with the body, not with other....objects.
If I wanted to specify other objects I would have. Women can, with their bodies, rape men. Physical arousal on the part of the man is NOT necessarily consent.

Wow. So completely uniformed. Men absolutely CAN be raped by women. It's simply not as common as the other way around...but cripes...would you seriously say to a male rape victim, that his female attacker didn't actually do it because it's not possible?
Other than statutory rape, IMHO erection implies consent, but then that's just me. :p

I think he meant just with the body, not with other....objects.
Fingers are not the body?

Shut up or be n00bed.
So hostile to god are we? Porn is evil and most likely should be banned. It was until these liberal activists judges starting hurtin America.

Other than statutory rape, IMHO erection implies consent, but then that's just me. :p
Tell that to the guys who wake up hard every morning. If someone jumps on that pole, then that erection is consent, and no doesn't mean no suddenly?

If I wanted to specify other objects I would have. Women can, with their bodies, rape men. Physical arousal on the part of the man is NOT necessarily consent.

I think we need to do some scientific studies on the viability of a tongue raping.

If I wanted to specify other objects I would have. Women can, with their bodies, rape men. Physical arousal on the part of the man is NOT necessarily consent.
It would be for me :p

I was just wondering why he said whatever to my post. but yeah, thanks for the help
:D

Other than statutory rape, IMHO erection implies consent, but then that's just me. :p
not actually, women have been known to uh..lubricate during rape and they still aren't "consenting" it's a body thing, if a man has a similar experience it's not fair to say that his body (which he has no control over) implied consent.



oh, and you have a TG (that's completely unrelated)

Tell that to the guys who wake up hard every morning. If someone jumps on that pole, then that erection is consent, and no doesn't mean no suddenly?
As I indicated, that's just me. Obviously, the law ( at least in America ) doesn't agree. For my entire life, if I didn't want to, it wouldn't! :p

Fingers are not the body?
yeah, but thanks for giving weird images in my head. damnit.

It would be for me :p
Boy, won't you be embarrased when your arousal is taken as consent by a large woman in a mumu. And even more embarrased when you find you can't make your erection disappear.

not actually, women have been known to uh..lubricate during rape and they still aren't "consenting" it's a body thing, if a man has a similar experience it's not fair to say that his body (which he has no control over) implied consent.

oh, and you have a TG (that's completely unrelated)
LOL! Thank you for the reassurance on that! :D

For women, any penetration without consent is rape ... period, whether she lubricates or not. IMHO, for men, any erection should be construed as "consent." As I said, that's just me. :)

As I indicated, that's just me. Obviously, the law ( at least in America ) doesn't agree.I'm not convinced that the law in your country says that erection = consent. Wait...or are you saying that erection isn't automatically consent? I'm confused.

yeah, but thanks for giving weird images in my head. damnit.
My pleasure. :)

... you can't make your erection disappear.
Never happen. When I don't want it, it goes away. When I do, it comes back. Simple. :D

LOL! Thank you for the reassurance on that! :D

For women, any penetration without consent is rape ... period, whether she lubricates or not. IMHO, for men, any erection should be construed as "consent." As I said, that's just me. :)
And if a man's body betrays him, too bad...his wishes are no longer part of the picture? Not all men have the 'iron control' you claim.

Never happen. When I don't want it, it goes away. When I do, it comes back. Simple. :D
You're "special" though. :)

Never happen. When I don't want it, it goes away. When I do, it comes back. Simple. :D
That's you, Eut. Not all men.

I'm not convinced that the law in your country says that erection = consent. Wait...or are you saying that erection isn't automatically consent? I'm confused.
I'm saying that the law here, in almost all cases, does NOT say that erection=consent. I, however, hold that it DOES. Better? :)

And if a man's body betrays him, too bad...his wishes are no longer part of the picture? Not all men have the 'iron control' you claim.
Duh. Which is why I said "just me." :)

I suspect it is common in women (Lack of experience means I cannot comment on what other men get up to) who like the idea of sex, but feel awkward about consenting to sex. They want sex, but are prudish about allowing themselves to be sexual. Therefore, in their fantasies such complications are put to the side but the choice being taken out of their hands. This is clearly very different to actually wanting to be raped, which is rarely if ever the case.
This is interesting and makes sense to me.

I've had rape fantasies. Lots of women do. But as Eut pointed out, it's more of wanting to be 'forced' to do something you'd like to do anyway. You don't actually want to be brutalised, or terrified.
Why is force needed when you want to do it anyway?

If you're a guy then you're retarded. Guys can't be raped by women. Guys can only get raped by guys. Which is nasty in my personal opinion but if that's what you like. ::shrugs::

Btw, only joking about you liking that.
It is possible. A woman can become a lot more powerful than any man if she has a gun.

If I wanted to specify other objects I would have. Women can, with their bodies, rape men. Physical arousal on the part of the man is NOT necessarily consent.
Other than statutory rape, IMHO erection implies consent, but then that's just me.
God no! Erection is not consent! Considering how men can sometimes have erections randomly even in non-sexual situations. Also consider that many women get wet and orgasm while being raped. It's just a natural dumb reaction. It has little to do with the mind.

It would be for me :p
Sounds like someone has a rape fantasy.

That's you, Eut. Not all men.
I know it takes me some time to rid of mine. An erection is definitely not a sign of consent.

I'm saying that the law here, in almost all cases, does NOT say that erection=consent. I, however, hold that it DOES. Better? :)
Yes.

And I think you have a terrible perception of what equals consent, when no + erection always means yes.

You're "special" though. :)
ROFLMAO!!! No, just .... um, nevermind! :D

Other than statutory rape, IMHO erection implies consent, but then that's just me. :p

...And does the reverse also apply, then? If a woman becomes sexually stimulate during rape then it implies consent?

I doubt you'll agree, so why should it be different for men?

After all, it's well-known that men have no control over our genitals. ;)

I know it takes me some time to rid of mine. An erection is definitely not a sign of consent.
And what about the night erection? Suddenly, any woman can walk into your room, see you aroused, and decide to have sex with you? Lock your doors, boys...

Yes.

And I think you have a terrible perception of what equals consent, when no + erection always means yes.
Perhaps so. I've never been noted for kow towing to the common perceptions. :)

If I wanted to specify other objects I would have. Women can, with their bodies, rape men. Physical arousal on the part of the man is NOT necessarily consent.
To quote Michael Douglas: It was an unvoluntary reflex.

And what about the night erection? Suddenly, any woman can walk into your room, see you aroused, and decide to have sex with you? Lock your doors, boys...
LOL!

AS IF! :D

Sounds like someone has a rape fantasy.
lmfao!

ROFLMAO!!! No, just .... um, nevermind! :D
You're the only elderly person I know who can use ":rolleyes: s" and "What...ever" like a high school (or uni) bimbo can. :) Admirable.

To quote Michael Douglas: It was an unvoluntary reflex.
Uh huh. Riiiight!

Sorry, but I'll never believe that! :p

And what about the night erection? Suddenly, any woman can walk into your room, see you aroused, and decide to have sex with you? Lock your doors, boys...
I wish!!!!!! Maybe I should leave my door open tonight........

You're the only elderly person I know who can use ":rolleyes: s" and "What...ever" like a high school (or uni) bimbo can. :) Admirable.
ROFLMFAO!!! Um ... I suppose I'll take that as a compliment, although "bimbo???" :eek:

Why is force needed when you want to do it anyway?

Because I'm not allowed, or it isn't actually possible (because of distance, or whatever). Remember, we're talking about fantasy.

Uh huh. Riiiight!

Sorry, but I'll never believe that! :p
Well, it is true.

ROFLMFAO!!! Um ... I suppose I'll take that as a compliment, although "bimbo???" :eek:
I admit to being shallow (and so are most of my gay friends). I actually find it cool. So yeah, it's a compliment. :p

...And does the reverse also apply, then? If a woman becomes sexually stimulate during rape then it implies consent?

I doubt you'll agree, so why should it be different for men?

After all, it's well-known that men have no control over our genitals. ;)
As an ex-marine Eut can probably get it up and down by shouting at it.

Its one of my ex's faults i fantasise about it :p

She was such a tease!!!!

Lip biting, bra-loosening, cross-dressing minx.
...
And then when she made sure you were interested she said "...Im hungry." and made a sandwich.

...
Why are women so evil daddy?

As an ex-marine Eut can probably get it up and down by shouting at it.
His little soldier. :)

Uh huh. Riiiight!

Sorry, but I'll never believe that! :p
You are belittling male rape victims, of which actually do exist, with your stubborn belief that what is true for you, must be true for all. So if a man is aroused, and is raped, it is entirely his fault. What a disgusting double standard. I'm sorry, but it really upsets me that you would approach this subject so flippantly.

I wish!!!!!! Maybe I should leave my door open tonight........
Funny how you assume that the woman who would do this, would be one you would want to have sex with.

Because I'm not allowed, or it isn't actually possible (because of distance, or whatever). Remember, we're talking about fantasy.
Not allowed by cultural norms/gender roles (as speculated by Oxfordland)?

His little soldier. :)
:D

His little soldier. :)

Someone please tell me this thread hasn't turned into a discussion about Eut's penis.

... elderly person ...
"Mature" or "wise" or even "sexy senior citizen" would be sooo much better! :D

Funny how you assume that the woman who would do this, would be one you would want to have sex with.
If she's not I'll just kick her out.

So, if a woman ties me up and teases me to an erection, and her ugly sister takes advantage of that, does that make it consentual?

Not allowed by cultural norms/gender roles (as speculated by Oxfordland)?
No, not allowed as in they are a coworker, or a friend's significant other, etc. As in, you just don't hop into bed with certain people, regardless of your attraction to them. Sexually, there is nothing I am 'not allowed'. There are certain things I won't do, period...in fantasy or in reality...but nothing I secretly want to do that I can't...excepting of course the aforementioned people that are out of bounds.

I've known several women who had fantasies about being raped, but in almost every one of them, it was idealized into something to which I wouldn't refer as "rape." More like being "forced" to do what they wanted to do in the first place. I consider it harmless.But as Eut pointed out, it's more of wanting to be 'forced' to do something you'd like to do anyway. You don't actually want to be brutalised, or terrified.

I agree with Eut and Sinuhue. The central point is that while women (or men) might be fantasizing about a scenario in which they are taken against their will, the fact that they're fantasizing about it obviously means that it's not really against their will.
Which is why I'm sure that while some women may even arrange to be "raped" by someone in a set-up (i..e consensual) encounter, none of them would be anything less than devastated if they really were the victim of a rape.

So I think Smunkee is right:but that's more Domination/Submissive than "rape". Exactly. Rape, here, is merely the subject of people's D/S fantasies. It's not "rape".

"Mature" or "wise" or even "sexy senior citizen" would be sooo much better! :D
Just be happy I didn't call you a "geezer". :)

I admit to being shallow (and so are most of my gay friends). I actually find it cool. So yeah, it's a compliment. :p
LOL! Kewl. :)

So, if a woman ties me up and teases me to an erection, and her ugly sister takes advantage of that, does that make it consentual?
That makes you stupid. For letting her tie you up in the first place.

As an ex-marine Eut can probably get it up and down by shouting at it.
ROFL!

"MARINE????!!!!" :mp5:

So, if a woman ties me up and teases me to an erection, and her ugly sister takes advantage of that, does that make it consentual?
And if a gay man is 'teased' into an erection by a woman, does that automatically mean he really wants to have sex with her?

Someone please tell me this thread hasn't turned into a discussion about Eut's penis.
His starspanked banner.

Someone please tell me this thread hasn't turned into a discussion about Eut's penis.
Not my fault. Blame Von Witzleben.

ROFL!

"MARINE????!!!!" :mp5:
I thought you used to be one?:confused:

You are belittling male rape victims, of which actually do exist, with your stubborn belief that what is true for you, must be true for all. So if a man is aroused, and is raped, it is entirely his fault. What a disgusting double standard. I'm sorry, but it really upsets me that you would approach this subject so flippantly.
Sigh. I said that my opinion just applied to me, Sinuhue. What more do you want? After so many years, I suppose I take that for granted. Perhaps there are men out there who litterally "cannot help themselves," but that's so far outside my own experience that I am skeptical in the extreme about it. All it would take is to imagine something horrific or horrible, like being castrated for example. :(

That makes you stupid. For letting her tie you up in the first place.

But if the woman who ties me up is attractive, does mean I'm stupid, or just an ordinary man? (Yes, I realize I just left myself open)

I agree that is weird. Of course, such fantasies can hardly be made illegal. That would involve some kind of mind control.

I thought you used to be one?:confused:
Army. A-R-M-Y. Army. ;)

But if the woman who ties me up is attractive, does mean I'm stupid, or just an ordinary man? (Yes, I realize I just left myself open)
No matter how attractive she is.

Army. A-R-M-Y. Army. ;)
Oh.

Army. A-R-M-Y. Army. ;)
Now I get it. You were a cheerleader.

Someone please tell me this thread hasn't turned into a discussion about Eut's penis.
:rolleyes:

Such was definitely never my intent. If it will make you feel any better, I'll stop posting in this thread entirely. :p

You are belittling male rape victims, of which actually do exist, with your stubborn belief that what is true for you, must be true for all. So if a man is aroused, and is raped, it is entirely his fault. What a disgusting double standard. I'm sorry, but it really upsets me that you would approach this subject so flippantly.
The first thing that came to my mind regarding this is actually the torture pictures out of Abu Ghraib/Iraq.
There you had men who had been stripped naked and, according to descriptions of the photos, had been manually stimulated into getting an erection.

I mean, hello? That certainly wasn't consensual in ayn sense of the word.

If someone would have taken even further sexual advantage in that moment, of course that would have been rape.

Now I get it. You were a cheerleader.
:rolleyes:

Why is force needed when you want to do it anyway?

that's why it's a fantasy, HH. Besides, do you understand the concept of roleplay?

Ideally, if you had a trusted patner that was familiar with such fantasies, they could 'surprise' you and the fantasy would be a bit more real. But it is still pretend, as most people here have agreed. real-life rape probably bears little resemblence.

Sigh. I said that my opinion just applied to me, Sinuhue. But it doesn't...you are applying it to all men. You are saying that because you can not conceive of it happening, that you wouldn't believe it. You can not possibly conceive of what it would be like to be a woman, and be raped...does that mean you wouldn't believe it could happen? Of course not. You have this strange double standard, and you aren't just applying it to you saying, "it could never happen to me, but it might happen to others". You're using the blanket approach.

Perhaps there are men out there who litterally "cannot help themselves," but that's so far outside my own experience that I am skeptical in the extreme about it. All it would take is to imagine something horrific or horrible, like being castrated for example. :(
All it would take for you. Just keep that in mind, and don't judge other people by yourself.

If she's not I'll just kick her out.
Sometimes not a choice when being raped.

No, not allowed as in they are a coworker, or a friend's significant other, etc. As in, you just don't hop into bed with certain people, regardless of your attraction to them. Sexually, there is nothing I am 'not allowed'. There are certain things I won't do, period...in fantasy or in reality...but nothing I secretly want to do that I can't...excepting of course the aforementioned people that are out of bounds.
How is it in any way better than imagining that you consent to imaginary sex with your co-worker? It's all in your head anyway, so it doesn't make a difference to reality.

Sometimes not a choice when being raped.
Unless she has tied me down in my sleep, or holds a gun to my head I'd definitly kick her out. But if she's attractive enough I'd let her have her way with me.

But it doesn't...you are applying it to all men. You are saying that because you can not conceive of it happening, that you wouldn't believe it. You can not possibly conceive of what it would be like to be a woman, and be raped...does that mean you wouldn't believe it could happen? Of course not. You have this strange double standard, and you aren't just applying it to you saying, "it could never happen to me, but it might happen to others". You're using the blanket approach.

All it would take for you. Just keep that in mind, and don't judge other people by yourself.
Point taken. My bad. Sorry. :(

How is it in any way better than imagining that you consent to imaginary sex with your co-worker? It's all in your head anyway, so it doesn't make a difference to reality.
Because sometimes my fantasies tend to be naughtier than at other times. And it's definately not all in my head...we don't generally have sexual fantasies just to exercise our brains...if you get my drift...sometimes a fantasy about consensual sex is too boring to be effective.

:rolleyes:

Such was definitely never my intent. If it will make you feel any better, I'll stop posting in this thread entirely. :p

Actually, I found the idea of hijacking a thread in such a manner rather amusing.
Still, best not to, eh? :D

Point taken. My bad. Sorry. :(
Thank you, Eut.

Unless she has tied me down in my sleep, or holds a gun to my head I'd definitly kick her out. But if she's attractive enough I'd let her have her way with me.
Or beats you up if she is well trained in martial arts.

Thank you, Eut.
No thanks necessary, hon. I just have real trouble understanding how any man wouldn't have control over his own body. I suppose it makes me skeptical in the extreme when some man cries "rape!" :(

Unless she has tied me down in my sleep, or holds a gun to my head I'd definitly kick her out. But if she's attractive enough I'd let her have her way with me.
And just pray that attractive stranger doesn't have some horrible sexually transmited infection to 'gift' you with...

And just pray that attractive stranger doesn't have some horrible sexually transmited infection to 'gift' you with...
Eh...she doesn't. Don't worry.:D

Or beats you up if she is well trained in martial arts.
Like I am.

Like I am.
And say she still beats you at it.

So...don't be too sure.

No thanks necessary, hon. I just have real trouble understanding how any man wouldn't have control over his own body. I suppose it makes me skeptical in the extreme when some man cries "rape!" :(
How often do men actually cry rape? Not often. There is a kind of shame or disbelief surrounding the issue that makes it extremely hard for victims to seek justice. But it DOES happen, and it can be as psychologically damaging as a woman being raped. Most cases are likely never reported, because there is often not the same kind of physical damage done by a female agressor, as would be done by a male agressor. It's harder to prove. So if a man says he's been raped by a woman, I would take the accusation seriously.

And also consider that most males who are sexually abused are abused as minors, and many of them by women. Clearly this is statuatory rape because of their age, but it is also just plain rape. We don't expect young boys and teens to be in full control of their body...is there some magical age where males must be in full control of their physical responses, and when rape by a woman is suddenly impossible?

And say she still beats you at it.
As kick boxer and free fighter i'm used to a little beating.

As kick boxer and free fighter i'm used to a little beating.
A little. ;) She may still topple you over.

Like I am.
Really? What discipline? :)

How often do men actually cry rape? Not often. There is a kind of shame or disbelief surrounding the issue that makes it extremely hard for victims to seek justice. But it DOES happen, and it can be as psychologically damaging as a woman being raped. Most cases are likely never reported, because there is often not the same kind of physical damage done by a female agressor, as would be done by a male agressor. It's harder to prove. So if a man says he's been raped by a woman, I would take the accusation seriously.

And also consider that most males are sexually abused as minors, and many of them by women. Clearly this is statuatory rape because of their age, but it is also just plain rape. We don't expect young boys and teens to be in full control of their body...is there some magical age where males must be in full control of their physical responses, and when rape by a woman is suddenly impossible?
I honestly don't know. :confused:

Really? What discipline? :)
Did Jiu Jitsu and Judo for a while. Then I got bored with those. Kick Boxing was more up my alley. More to the point without having to remember all the silly kata's. And lately I started doing free fighting. Weird having to re-learn all those Judo and Jiu Jitsu technics. Especially those on the ground.

And also consider that most males are sexually abused as minors, and many of them by women.

Excuse me?

Call me sceptical, but I'd like to see a source for that, please.

Did Jiu Jitsu and Judo for a while. Then I got bored with those. Kick Boxing was more up my alley. More to the point without having to remember all the silly kata's. And lately I started doing free fighting. Weird having to re-learn all those Judo and Jiu Jitsu technics. Especially those on the ground.
I'm currently contemplating what to learn. Stuck between Wing Chun, Karate, Aikido and the Krav Maga. I want to mix up a style or two, but it's difficult to find training centres where I study.

Excuse me?

Call me sceptical, but I'd like to see a source for that, please.

Yes. Me too. I want to complain that that never happend to me. I feel left out.

Excuse me?

Call me sceptical, but I'd like to see a source for that, please.
http://www.ncptsd.va.gov/facts/specific/fs_male_sexual_assault.html

http://www.malesurvivor.org/myths.htm

And by the way, perhaps you misread. I said that the majority of males who are abused, are abused as minors...not that a majority of males are abused period.

Excuse me?.
Call me sceptical, but I'd like to see a source for thatmy babysitter was hot... and very playful..
but I don't think they keep national stats for that..

I'm currently contemplating what to learn. Stuck between Wing Chun, Karate, Aikido and the Krav Maga. I want to mix up a style or two, but it's difficult to find training centres where I study.
Aikido is cool. Tough to learn though. So I've been told. Also heard its often considerd to be the ultimate martial art. Don't know much about Krav Maga. I wanted to check on that too. I learned you can learn that in my town. Allthough the guy that teaching it is not part of the KM union/league whatever it is called. Never liked Karate. And Wing Chun. Well, the master Bruce Lee started with that. So it can't be bad.
Where do you live? Don't they have guide to sport clubs/schools etc.... for your town/area?

Yes. Me too. I want to complain that that never happend to me. I feel left out.
I must have worded that badly. I'm not saying most males are abused...but of those that ARE abused, most were abused as minors. Make sense?

Aikido is cool. Tough to learn though. So I've been told. Also heard its often considerd to be the ultimate martial art. Don't know much about Krav Maga. I wanted to check on that too. I learned you can learn that in my town. Allthough the guy that teaching it is not part of the KM union/league whatever it is called. Never liked Karate. And Wing Chun. Well, the master Bruce Lee started with that. So it can't be bad.
Where do you live? Don't they have guide to sport clubs/schools etc.... for your town/area?
Aikido is indeed hard to learn, and extremely effective. It's nowhere on offer nearby me though. Krav Maga is rumoured to be highly efficient, and geared towards all situations, as well as relying little on strength. Same with Wing Chun (and Aikido).

I study in the UK, in Lancaster, and the only arts out of the ones I am considering on offer are Wing Chun and Karate.

I must have worded that badly. I'm not saying most males are abused...but of those that ARE abused, most were abused as minors. Make sense?
Yes it does. But I still want to complain.

So hostile to god are we? Porn is evil and most likely should be banned. It was until these liberal activists judges starting hurtin America.
No he was hostile to you
You != God

http://www.ncptsd.va.gov/facts/specific/fs_male_sexual_assault.html

http://www.malesurvivor.org/myths.htm

And by the way, perhaps you misread. I said that the majority of males who are abused, are abused as minors...not that a majority of males are abused period.

No, you didn't, you simply said 'most males', even though you meant 'most males who are abused'. Thank you for clarifying your statement.

No, you didn't, you simply said 'most males', even though you meant 'most males who are abused'. Thank you for clarifying your statement.
Yes, when I reread it, I suddenly understood your skepticism:)

<snip>Start a thread about martial arts

Aikido is indeed hard to learn, and extremely effective. It's nowhere on offer nearby me though. Krav Maga is rumoured to be highly efficient. Same with Wing Chun.

I study in the UK, in Lancaster, and the only arts out of the ones I am considering on offer are Wing Chun and Karate.
We have an excellent Wing Chun school in my town. They are part of Bao Trieu. I see you also have a Kuk Sool Won school in Lancaster.

Start a thread about martial arts
No need, I have been in quite a few already.

We have an excellent Wing Chun school in my town. They are part of Bao Trieu. I see you also have a Kuk Sool Won school in Lancaster.
(last hijack)
Are you in Germany? The university has a really nice training school too, led by Master Kwok. I might go to it for now, and later do Aikido/ Krav Maga.

I must have worded that badly. I'm not saying most males are abused...but of those that ARE abused, most were abused as minors. Make sense?

That's a relief. I was beginning to wonder why no hot adult women abused me as a minor. Or as an adult either. :(

That's a relief. I was beginning to wonder why no hot adult women abused me as a minor. Or as an adult either. :(
I hear you.:(

Because sometimes my fantasies tend to be naughtier than at other times. And it's definately not all in my head...we don't generally have sexual fantasies just to exercise our brains...if you get my drift...sometimes a fantasy about consensual sex is too boring to be effective.
Hmm, never thought of that. Thanks for the tip. I must be off now, good night all!

Yes. Me too. I want to complain that that never happend to me. I feel left out.
Leave the thread, you're talking out of your ass. Even the UN Abassadorship's posts here have more validity than yours.

No need, I have been in quite a few already.


(last hijack)
Are you in Germany? The university has a nice training school too, led by Master Kwok. I might go to it for now, and later do Aikido/ Krav Maga.
Groningen, the Netherlands.

No need, I have been in quite a few already.
the point is that you're hijacking this thread.

Anyway, back on topic, I've had some mild fantasies including "forcible" sex. But I'm not sure that that really qualifies as a rape fantasy or what the border is. I think that just the idea of being possesed by someone is attractive on a basic level.

the point is that you're hijacking this thread.

Anyway, back on topic, I've had some mild fantasies including "forcible" sex. But I'm not sure that that really qualifies as a rape fantasy or what the border is. I think that just the idea of being possesed by someone is attractive on a basic level.
It is. I would set a limit though on extreme physical pain. That would turn me off, and I'd end up reciprocating.

Anyway, back on topic, I've had some mild fantasies including "forcible" sex. But I'm not sure that that really qualifies as a rape fantasy or what the border is. I think that just the idea of being possesed by someone is attractive on a basic level.
That could explain why women are often attracted to "bad boys". Even if they treat them like shit.

That could explain why women are often attracted to "bad boys". Even if they treat them like shit.
Or why some guys like bitches.

Or why some guys like bitches.
Or that, yes.

Anyway, back on topic, I've had some mild fantasies including "forcible" sex. But I'm not sure that that really qualifies as a rape fantasy or what the border is. I think that just the idea of being possesed by someone is attractive on a basic level.
It's patriarchal brainwashing, you can be sure.

That could explain why women are often attracted to "bad boys". Even if they treat them like shit.
I don't know that the extension from sex to general relationship dynamics can be made. I would not be impressed or turned on by anyone that attempted to posses my life, or treat me as an object in a relationship; in fact, I'm the one that tends to be a bit domineering (personality-wise) between my boyfirend and I. The fantasy stops at the bedroom door.

I don't know that the extension from sex to general relationship dynamics can be made. I would not be impressed or turned on by anyone that attempted to posses my life, or treat me as an object in a relationship; in fact, I'm the one that tends to be a bit domineering (personality-wise) between my boyfirend and I. The fantasy stops at the bedroom door.
Same here.

The sympathetic nervous system controls sexual arousal -- and also the fight/fight response, and fear.

Being powerful in some people creates a nervous system resopnse that also activates the part of the brain that makes you aroused, as does being terribly threatened or afraid.

There's also got to be the adrenaline rush of breaking the social norms by having a sexual encounter deviant from the script handed to us by civil society.

Plenty of possible reasons. Heck, some people like dressing up in animal costumes. Who can really explain what turns people on?

It's patriarchal brainwashing, you can be sure.
No, I'm not sure at all. It may be.

Yet, if there is a power dynamic that's beneficial to the pleasure of both patners, I don't have that huge of a beef with it. The fantasy could be reversed with the woman dominating just as easily.

I don't know that the extension from sex to general relationship dynamics can be made. I would not be impressed or turned on by anyone that attempted to posses my life, or treat me as an object in a relationship; in fact, I'm the one that tends to be a bit domineering (personality-wise) between my boyfirend and I. The fantasy stops at the bedroom door.

Same here. IRL, bitchy women turn me off. That doesn't stop me from fantasizing about a hot woman (who probably IS a bitch) assaulting me against my will.

No he was hostile to you
You != God
Are you saying Im equal to God? Thank you Im flattered

It's patriarchal brainwashing, you can be sure.
Why are you assuming that her fantasies include being possessed by a male?:p

Are you saying Im equal to God? Thank you Im flattered
!=
means, does not equal.

No, I'm not sure at all. It may be.

Yet, if there is a power dynamic that's beneficial to the pleasure of both patners, I don't have that huge of a beef with it. The fantasy could be reversed with the woman dominating just as easily.
I'd be more than willing to dominate a guy if I was a woman.

Why are you assuming that her fantasies include being possessed by a male?
Heteronormativity.

the point is that you're hijacking this thread.

Anyway, back on topic, I've had some mild fantasies including "forcible" sex. But I'm not sure that that really qualifies as a rape fantasy or what the border is. I think that just the idea of being possesed by someone is attractive on a basic level.
Sometimes it's the idea that someone wants you so badly they're willing to "force" you to do all those things you really wanted to do anyway. :D

The fantasy stops at the bedroom door.
Whoah. Your bedroom has a door? Cool. :cool:

Heteronormativity.
FASS! CURE THIS MAN!

Are you saying Im equal to God? Thank you Im flattered

!= == Not Equal

Unles you are in certian languages

It could be /= or =/= as well

I don't know that the extension from sex to general relationship dynamics can be made. I would not be impressed or turned on by anyone that attempted to posses my life, or treat me as an object in a relationship; in fact, I'm the one that tends to be a bit domineering (personality-wise) between my boyfirend and I. The fantasy stops at the bedroom door.
Oh I don't know. They even make songs about it.
Halleluja (http://www.lyrics007.com/Rufus%20Wainwright%20Lyrics/Halleluja%20Lyrics.html)

FASS! CURE THIS MAN!
lol, well she is heterosexual.

I'd be more than willing to dominate a guy if I was a woman.Really? How...do you know?

I tried to imagine myself being a man, and couldn't. Funny that.

and Yay! poeple agree with me!

lol, well she is heterosexual.
Oh, that's just because she hasn't met the right woman. *snickers*...just kidding!

Whoah. Your bedroom has a door? Cool. :cool:
one of those curtains made of beads would be even cooler.

Really? How...do you know?

I tried to imagine myself being a man, and couldn't. Funny that.

and Yay! poeple agree with me!
I can easily imagine myself as a woman, and then I have a very dominant streak. High heels, a whip, martial arts expertise and a sexy leather outfit, and a sharp tongue. As a guy I'd prefer being submissive.

Oh, that's just because she hasn't met the right woman. *snickers*...just kidding!Alright Sinuhue...next time you're in Vancouver, maybe you could change my mind?

Oh I don't know. They even make songs about it.
Halleluja (http://www.lyrics007.com/Rufus%20Wainwright%20Lyrics/Halleluja%20Lyrics.html)
Yay Rufus! that's some pretty literary songwriting. David and Bathseba and whatnot.

Alright Sinuhue...next time you're in Vancouver, maybe you could change my mind?
*wiggles eyebrows suggestively, then gives up...it looks silly anyway*

Unless she has tied me down in my sleep, or holds a gun to my head I'd definitly kick her out. But if she's attractive enough I'd let her have her way with me.

If...I once knew an unattractive, fat, greasy, sweaty woman who wanted to sleep with me.

If I had awakened with her on top of me, and me tied down, I would have chewed my way outta that situation, or kicked and yelled, because sometimes moist friction can keep the erection from retiring upon command...:(

That could explain why women are often attracted to "bad boys". Even if they treat them like shit.

I was thinking about that last weekend, and I believe that women are attracted to powerful men, and "bad boys" do what they want, which equals power.

Nice guys do what others want, which equals powerless.

"Bad boys" are usually self-confident. Women like self-confident, assertive/aggressive guys.

I was thinking about that last weekend, and I believe that women are attracted to powerful men, and "bad boys" do what they want, which equals power.

Nice guys do what others want, which equals powerless.

"Bad boys" are usually self-confident. Women like self-confident, assertive/aggressive guys.Oh noes! not the "nice guy vs. bad boy" discussion for the nth time! shoo!

!=
means, does not equal.
oh, well that changes the meaning completely

oh, well that changes the meaning completely
You're a smart one. :)

I was thinking about that last weekend, and I believe that women are attracted to powerful men, and "bad boys" do what they want, which equals power.

Nice guys do what others want, which equals powerless.

"Bad boys" are usually self-confident. Women like self-confident, assertive/aggressive guys.
Nice guys end up last. It's a fact of life. Back in the good ol caveman days the "bad boys" went out and clubbered the women dragging them back to their cave. While the "nice guy" stayed home doing cavepaintings.

Oh noes! not the "nice guy vs. bad boy" discussion for the nth time! shoo!
Agreed. :p

You're a smart one. :)
why thank you

*wiggles eyebrows suggestively, then gives up...it looks silly anyway*eyebrows...eyebrows are nice. I've been complimented on mine before... by my mum, no less...
Sorry Sinuhue, I think I just killed the mood.

*creeps back to bf*

why thank you
Holy cow, did your name always read "The UN abassadorship"? Without an "m"? I honestly just now noticed that for the very first time. :eek:

Ah, what a strange thing the human brain is.

[/off-topic] sorry, please continue (although let's face it, most of this thread hasn't been on topic since page 3)

Holy cow, did your name always read "The UN abassadorship"? Without an "m"? I honestly just now noticed that for the very first time. :eek:

Ah, what a strange thing the human brain is.

[/off-topic] sorry, please continue (although let's face it, most of this thread hasn't been on topic since page 3)
I noticed from his first 3-year old style post. Quite cute. :p

I noticed from his first 3-year old style post. Quite cute. :p
Heh, yeah, which is why I find it so remarkable that I seem to have read just straight over it all this time.

Nice guys end up last. It's a fact of life. Back in the good ol caveman days the "bad boys" went out and clubbered the women dragging them back to their cave. While the "nice guy" stayed home doing cavepaintings.

Exactly!

Better to be with Hannibal Lector than be with one of the guys who gets his face ripped off...

That's it! No more Mr. Nice Guy for me! Grrrrrrrrrr!!!:p