Deific Drunk Talk and Holy Pick-up Lines
Saint Curie
24-03-2006, 06:29
Here's the premise: God (any god) is at a bar, wasted, and trying to pick up a lady (or guy, whatever's funny).
GOD: Yeah, so...I am the Lord thy God, you should go home with me...
Tawny: I dunno...I wanna dance some more, y'know, and you've...you've really had a lot to drink.
GOD: Oh, c'mon, baby. Its not that which goeth into a man's mouth, but that which cometh out that defile him (urp-retch-bllaaaaaauuugh)...oh, shit sorry...
Tawny: God...puked on me.
Thor: Wanna see my hammer?
Saint Curie
24-03-2006, 06:40
Thor: Wanna see my hammer?
Staci with an i: Wow, do you work out? Wait, I heard you've cracked the ice of winter with a lot girls. Have you been tested?
IL Ruffino
24-03-2006, 06:43
God: You like yer boobs? I created em special just for you baby!
Fat Guy: I just turned atheist.. sorry..
God walks away looking for his next victim.
Straughn
25-03-2006, 06:10
God: You like yer boobs? I created em special just for you baby!
Fat Guy: I just turned atheist.. sorry..
God walks away looking for his next victim.
There's some good ones, but this one is perhaps sigworthy. *nods*
Peechland
25-03-2006, 06:18
God:"Hey hot stuff, they call me the Almighty...what's your name?"
Woman: "My name is Delilah"
God: "That's lovely......Oh man, will ya look at the time!" *flees*
Odin: "Theres a reason they call me the Allfather babe..."
Zeus: *Looks at a school boys* "Wheres my eagle when I need it?"
Mohamed: " Want to join a wives club....."
L Ron Hubard: "You are full of thetans and oral sex is the only cure."
Jesus: "Wash my feet bitch."
Didn't Family Guy have God trying to pick-up a girl once?
Upper Botswavia
25-03-2006, 06:30
Jesus: Hey baby, wanna see something, look down at THIS!
Bambi: Jesus Christ!
Jesus: Why... yes!
Didn't Family Guy have God trying to pick-up a girl once?
Accually, twice. Once at a bowling ally (he poors the woman a beer, then lets it got without it falling). The second time he is in a bar, lights a woman's cigarette by snapping, then lights the bar on fire. Him andJesus drive away in their Escalade.