NationStates Jolt Archive

I hate complications.

To give a brief explanation of the situation: I've known this girl for a while. Not well, but I had met and talked to her a bit, and I was pretty cool with one of her best friends. She was pretty good looking, and seemed like someone I would be interested in.

She had a boyfriend. Some sophomore or some bs like that(she's a sophomore too, btw). I knew she was really into him, so I pretty much put away hope of getting with her. Not dead, but didn't plan on it.

Recently, they broke up. I don't know the exact details of what went on, but some trust issue or something. I had been slowly getting to know her better, talking to her once in a while and stuff before.

Well, last friday, we were both doing a choir concert at school. She was hanging out with two of her friends who I know, one of them the one I know well. All night I hung out with them, and they were all getting pretty close to me(hugging on me for a long time, laying on me, etc). It was all fun and games, but I was really starting to like this girl. I figured, she had broke up with her boyfriend something like a month before, maybe a little less.

So I sent her a thing on myspace the next day asking if she wanted to hang out sometime, she said it sounded awesome, and sent me her phone number. I called her, and we decided to hang out after school on monday.

Finally, on monday, we were hanging out. We were pretty much holding hands wherever we went, and having a lot of fun. We decided to walk home, I found out we live really close to each other. I was putting on my best "game", for lack of a better term, and I thought I was doing really well. She seemed to be having a lot of fun, and it was really cool.

We stopped at a park on the way to our houses, to have a smoke. One thing led to another, and we started kissing.

The rest of the way to our houses, we were kissing and holding hands, and being really playful. I was really happy, because I thought this meant she wanted to be going out with me. I didn't see any reason why not.

Yet, the next day at school(tuesday), she was being distant. I could barely get her to hold my hand, and she rejected me when I went in for a kiss(saying she didn't want to get sick, which I had been for days). I thought it was pretty wierd.

I made it a point to ask her what was going on with her after school. She told me that she was interested in me, but she still wasn't over her ex-boyfriend. I've had multiple people reiterate this to me as well.

Now I'm just really in a bad place. While me and her are pretty much back to just being friends, its just a bit awkward now. I've gone back into a pretty big depression now. I really hate it, because I just wish there was something I could do about it. I like her, she likes me, It just seems wrong that we aren't together. Even more, I have lost pretty much all interest in girls other than her now. I just don't get excited over them now.

Maybe the ex called her up after your date and now she's a bit confused. Just play it cool, be nice but give her some space and she will come to you if she is still interested.

:)

Hit on one of her friends. That'll get her over the ex quickly enough.

It really depends on the circumstances of her breakup and how she feels about him. As hard as it may be to take, she might have enjoyed the night because it reminded her of being with her ex, and after the "buzz" was gone she regretted it. Lord knows I've felt the same on multiple occasions. She says she's interested in you, but isn't over her ex. Take it at face value and give her space. If you tell her that you'll give her space to do whatever feels right, then you're leaving the field open for her to return to you when she's over him. It'll also show that you're caring, which always helps :)

Maybe she's worried that if on your first date you kissed, held hands, and hugged that you'd expect more on the second date. She might feel things were progressing too fast and wants to put the brakes on for a bit.

Chellis, your situation is remarkably similar to mine... so you are certainly not alone. Trust me, I've been dealing with this crap for months now. Maybe it will get better, maybe it won't. The biggest thing that you have to remember is that no matter what you do, you're going to have to be able to live your choices, to deal with the choices of others, and to never give up when things get too hard.

Nah, the biggest thing you have to remember is that there are millions of girls out there, and if she "can't get over her ex" you're not obligated to wait for her.

Nah, the biggest thing you have to remember is that there are millions of girls out there, and if she "can't get over her ex" you're not obligated to wait for her.

So, here is the big question, OP. How crazy about her are you?

So, here is the big question, OP. How crazy about her are you?

I wish I could objectively say. I really thought she was cool, and liked her before the date, but afterward, I lost all interest in other girls, even one of the hottest girls I've ever personally known, who I had a feeling was interested in me, and I had been working on for a while.

I know it has to do with not being able to be with her, making me want her more, but still...

Maybe she's worried that if on your first date you kissed, held hands, and hugged that you'd expect more on the second date. She might feel things were progressing too fast and wants to put the brakes on for a bit.

I indeed have thought about this. However, she and her friends are... sexual, to put it in that way. Not sluts, but very open with their sexuality. She did say that she was a bit surprised when I first kissed her, though.

It really depends on the circumstances of her breakup and how she feels about him. As hard as it may be to take, she might have enjoyed the night because it reminded her of being with her ex, and after the "buzz" was gone she regretted it. Lord knows I've felt the same on multiple occasions. She says she's interested in you, but isn't over her ex. Take it at face value and give her space. If you tell her that you'll give her space to do whatever feels right, then you're leaving the field open for her to return to you when she's over him. It'll also show that you're caring, which always helps :)

I havn't said any of this out loud, but I've showed it to her. I have accepted that she needs time, and I've been giving it to her. I really want her to get over her ex, for her own sake if nothing else. I hate seeing her so sad over him.

I havn't said any of this out loud, but I've showed it to her. I have accepted that she needs time, and I've been giving it to her. I really want her to get over her ex, for her own sake if nothing else. I hate seeing her so sad over him.
I tell you, it's unbelievable how fast they get over the ex when you start hitting and getting somewhere with somebody else.

I get the feeling this girl is not really that into you, but she wants to be. Unfortunately what one wants to feel and what one actually feels are two totally different things. So she doesn't feel all that good for not being that much into you, and that's what she says she's still not over the other guy. As an explanation to give to herself and to you.

So, tell her "Sure, no problem," and then move on. Worst thing that can happen is that she does get into you anyway, but at least you'll be into someone else.

I tell you, it's unbelievable how fast they get over the ex when you start hitting and getting somewhere with somebody else.

I get the feeling this girl is not really that into you, but she wants to be. Unfortunately what one wants to feel and what one actually feels are two totally different things. So she doesn't feel all that good for not being that much into you, and that's what she says she's still not over the other guy. As an explanation to give to herself and to you.

So, tell her "Sure, no problem," and then move on. Worst thing that can happen is that she does get into you anyway, but at least you'll be into someone else.

I don't know. Normally, I would agree with you. However, I know her fairly well, and her friend that I'm close to wouldn't bs me about this. She really does seem like she can't get over her ex. She has some fairly big self-esteem problems.

"Not sure what to do"

Ever hear of patience? Try it, it's easy and you may actually come to like it. :)

"Not sure what to do"

Ever hear of patience? Try it, it's easy and you may actually come to like it. :)

This is exactly what I am doing. I just hate it, because I hate not being able to be proactive about things.

This is exactly what I am doing. I just hate it, because I hate not being able to be proactive about things.
ROFLMFAO!!! Don't bullshit me! You just want some ... NOW! :D

I've been in situations like this before, and I can tell you one thing. You do not want to be the "rebound guy". It won't end up being fair to you or to her.

I would say give her space, but make sure to let her know that you care and that you'll be there for her. You might also tell her that you're willing to take things as slow as she wants.

Do NOT hit on any of her friends. I doubt that would do anything but make you look like a total player.

I know it sucks, but there really isn't anything you can do to help her get over her ex, unless you want to be her shoulder to cry on (which would be a bit awkward for you if you're interested in her).

I don't know. Normally, I would agree with you. However, I know her fairly well, and her friend that I'm close to wouldn't bs me about this. She really does seem like she can't get over her ex. She has some fairly big self-esteem problems.
Oooh, if that's the case then count your blessings and run straight in the other direction. Being a friend and all that is good, as long as you don't end up being the guy going to pick her up at 3 AM after the jerk she's been dating dumped her for the 27th time. And you certainly don't want to get into a deeper thing until she's gotten over her issues.

ROFLMFAO!!! Don't bullshit me! You just want some ... NOW! :D

No, I don't Eut, and I don't even find it funny. This has dropped me from one of the single happiest periods(sustained) of my life(last three months), to a very low point.

ROFLMFAO!!! Don't bullshit me! You just want some ... NOW! :D
That's what they call it nowadays, being proactive :D

Oooh, if that's the case then count your blessings and run straight in the other direction. Being a friend and all that is good, as long as you don't end up being the guy going to pick her up at 3 AM after the jerk she's been dating dumped her for the 27th time. And you certainly don't want to get into a deeper thing until she's gotten over her issues.

Don't worry. I'm an avid reader and follower of ladder theory. If things start detouring me toward being an intellectual whore, she is so next'd.

That's what they call it nowadays, being proactive :D
Figured that out all by my lil ole self, I did. :D

No, I don't Eut, and I don't even find it funny. This has dropped me from one of the single happiest periods(sustained) of my life(last three months), to a very low point.
What are you after then? Companionship? Friendship? Affection?

What are you after then? Companionship? Friendship? Affection?

Certainty. That's what everyone is after, and I can gaurantee you that he wants it. ;)

Certainty. That's what everyone is after, and I can gaurantee you that he wants it. ;)
Certainty is an illusion.

Certainty is an illusion.

Of course. But the fact that it doesn't really exist doesn't effect it's desirability...

Well there's a fine line between being dedicated and stalking.
I suggest stalking. Once she's used to seeing your face peering at her through her bedroom curtains at 3 in the morning, she'll soon fall for you.
Trust me.

The rest of the way to our houses, we were kissing and holding hands, and being really playful. I was really happy, because I thought this meant she wanted to be going out with me. I didn't see any reason why not.
It's best not to presume, for your own benefit. I don't think it's a good idea to let a girl you don't know well be your girlfriend.

Yet, the next day at school(tuesday), she was being distant. I could barely get her to hold my hand, and she rejected me when I went in for a kiss(saying she didn't want to get sick, which I had been for days). I thought it was pretty wierd.

I made it a point to ask her what was going on with her after school. She told me that she was interested in me, but she still wasn't over her ex-boyfriend. I've had multiple people reiterate this to me as well.
You jumped the gun. That's OK. Almost all of us, male and female, learn that the hard way. One month is not a long time to get over a serious or semi-serious relationship.

Now I'm just really in a bad place. While me and her are pretty much back to just being friends, its just a bit awkward now. I've gone back into a pretty big depression now. I really hate it, because I just wish there was something I could do about it.
Just be friends then, for the time being. I don't see what's so bad; genuine friendship is a great thing.

I like her, she likes me, It just seems wrong that we aren't together. Even more, I have lost pretty much all interest in girls other than her now. I just don't get excited over them now.
She may feel the same way about her ex-boyfriend. She has trouble getting excited about anyone but him. Yet at the same time she likes you and doesn't want to risk screwing things up by not acting in the way that she would normally. People's feelings need time to change, so give yourself and her time.


But don't take my word as truth. I'm probably just projecting my experiences onto your life, due to my extreme lack of knowledge of the circumstances and you and her.

I wish I could objectively say. I really thought she was cool, and liked her before the date, but afterward, I lost all interest in other girls, even one of the hottest girls I've ever personally known, who I had a feeling was interested in me, and I had been working on for a while.

I know it has to do with not being able to be with her, making me want her more, but still...
I suggest you focus on this feeling of want. Really throw yourself into it! You should build a shrine to her in your basement and maybe think about investing in a camera with a telescopic lense or something..

It's best not to presume, for your own benefit. I don't think it's a good idea to let a girl you don't know well be your girlfriend.


You jumped the gun. That's OK. Almost all of us, male and female, learn that the hard way. One month is not a long time to get over a serious or semi-serious relationship.


Just be friends then, for the time being. I don't see what's so bad; genuine friendship is a great thing.


She may feel the same way about her ex-boyfriend. She has trouble getting excited about anyone but him. Yet at the same time she likes you and doesn't want to risk screwing things up by not acting in the way that she would normally. People's feelings need time to change, so give yourself and her time.


But don't take my word as truth. I'm probably just projecting my experiences onto your life, due to my extreme lack of knowledge of the circumstances and you and her.

This is what I've been figuring, especially the last part(her and her ex). Like I said, I really feel bad, and wish for her own sake she would get over him. I am giving her time, I just wish there was something more I could do.

I hate complications.

To give a brief explanation of the situation: I've known this girl for a while. Not well, but I had met and talked to her a bit, and I was pretty cool with one of her best friends. She was pretty good looking, and seemed like someone I would be interested in.

She had a boyfriend. Some sophomore or some bs like that(she's a sophomore too, btw). I knew she was really into him, so I pretty much put away hope of getting with her. Not dead, but didn't plan on it.

Recently, they broke up. I don't know the exact details of what went on, but some trust issue or something. I had been slowly getting to know her better, talking to her once in a while and stuff before.

Well, last friday, we were both doing a choir concert at school. She was hanging out with two of her friends who I know, one of them the one I know well. All night I hung out with them, and they were all getting pretty close to me(hugging on me for a long time, laying on me, etc). It was all fun and games, but I was really starting to like this girl. I figured, she had broke up with her boyfriend something like a month before, maybe a little less.

So I sent her a thing on myspace the next day asking if she wanted to hang out sometime, she said it sounded awesome, and sent me her phone number. I called her, and we decided to hang out after school on monday.

Finally, on monday, we were hanging out. We were pretty much holding hands wherever we went, and having a lot of fun. We decided to walk home, I found out we live really close to each other. I was putting on my best "game", for lack of a better term, and I thought I was doing really well. She seemed to be having a lot of fun, and it was really cool.

We stopped at a park on the way to our houses, to have a smoke. One thing led to another, and we started kissing.

The rest of the way to our houses, we were kissing and holding hands, and being really playful. I was really happy, because I thought this meant she wanted to be going out with me. I didn't see any reason why not.

Yet, the next day at school(tuesday), she was being distant. I could barely get her to hold my hand, and she rejected me when I went in for a kiss(saying she didn't want to get sick, which I had been for days). I thought it was pretty wierd.

I made it a point to ask her what was going on with her after school. She told me that she was interested in me, but she still wasn't over her ex-boyfriend. I've had multiple people reiterate this to me as well.

Now I'm just really in a bad place. While me and her are pretty much back to just being friends, its just a bit awkward now. I've gone back into a pretty big depression now. I really hate it, because I just wish there was something I could do about it. I like her, she likes me, It just seems wrong that we aren't together. Even more, I have lost pretty much all interest in girls other than her now. I just don't get excited over them now.

Sounds to me like a classic case whereby you got used like toilet paper and thrown away. Now you're a "friend" again, but she has you on a string and knows that whenever she can't advance with her actual love interest, she can still rely on you to make her feel better. Whether she will or not is questionable, if she does there is a chance you will get further than mere kissing next time - but in the end she will again toss you aside because she doesn't have that much respect for you.

You're better off realizing that she's using you and abandoning yourself to wild drinking and orgies until you find you were overhyping her in your own mind because you wanted her to be something she was not.

Women use men all the time, but we're societally conditioned to believe that it only happens the other way around. Or we delude ourselves into believing some arbitrary person is exceptional, despite evidence to the contrary.

Sounds to me like a classic case whereby you got used like toilet paper and thrown away. Now you're a "friend" again, but she has you on a string and knows that whenever she can't advance with her actual love interest, she can still rely on you to make her feel better.

Did you even try to see this from the girl's POV? She just broke up with her boyfriend. That's not easy for her either. Not many people are able to just end a relationship and start a new one almost immediately. A period of transition is needed.

It is too early to tell if she's using Chellis, and in any case we on the net don't have enough information.

I think that Chellis is smart enough to watch out for the behaviour you're talking about, but it sounds to me that to her he's not just another friend.

Whether she will or not is questionable, if she does there is a chance you will get further than mere kissing next time - but in the end she will again toss you aside because she doesn't have that much respect for you.
Jesus H. Christ this is not necessarily all about getting to "second/third/fourth base" or getting pussy or whatever phrase you want to use.

Women use men all the time, but we're societally conditioned to believe that it only happens the other way around. Or we delude ourselves into believing some arbitrary person is exceptional, despite evidence to the contrary.
Ah yes, the usual unsubtly veiled anti-women agenda of Santa Barbara.

Memo: humans, especially in very emotive states are not rational thinkers. It's not rational to think that some arbitrary person is exceptional, but we do, and it just proves how rationalism is not perfect.

So I sent her a thing on myspace the next day asking if she wanted to hang out sometime, she said it sounded awesome, and sent me her phone number. I called her, and we decided to hang out after school on monday.

:headbang: :headbang: :headbang: :headbang: :headbang:
WRONG:
So I asked her (in person) for her number, so that I can call her and we can hang out somewhere. She said it sounded awesome and gave me her phone number. I called her, and I received the message "We're sorry, the number you have dialed is not in service. Please check the number, or try your call again. This is a recording." every time of my multiple tries
X5
:headbang: :headbang: :headbang: :headbang: :headbang:

:headbang: :headbang: :headbang: :headbang: :headbang:
WRONG:

X5
:headbang: :headbang: :headbang: :headbang: :headbang:

Ermm... She gave me her correct number, and we ended up hanging out... so wtf mate?

Hit on one of her friends. That'll get her over the ex quickly enough.
This does work :D :D and hell if it goes slightly wrong you get her friend(s)!! ;) :D

Ehh. Yesterday, I got high, got drunk right after, was totally wasted... sobered up, went to a party, got drunk again, and fucked around with a girl(Not as much as I wanted to get, because her friend was a total bitch, but still got more play than anyone there). So at least I have a nice fat hickey to show kim monday.

Ehh. Yesterday, I got high, got drunk right after, was totally wasted... sobered up, went to a party, got drunk again, and fucked around with a girl(Not as much as I wanted to get, because her friend was a total bitch, but still got more play than anyone there). So at least I have a nice fat hickey to show kim monday.
So how do you feel now. And who is Kim?

Did you even try to see this from the girl's POV?

Of course I did. I'm a total jerk and I use women all the time. Naturally, I can tell when I see the activities of a woman who behaves like I do. ;)


Jesus H. Christ this is not necessarily all about getting to "second/third/fourth base" or getting pussy or whatever phrase you want to use.

I'm just pointing out that just because a long term romance is unlikely doesn't mean he can't have some fun out of this situation.


Ah yes, the usual unsubtly veiled anti-women agenda of Santa Barbara.

Anti-woman agenda? LOL. Yeah. Uhuh. How dare I suggest that hey, women are just as bastardly as men are. I guess I meant to say that women are saintly goddesses and would never, ever use a man for anything. Whew! Thank God for you, making sure to set the record straight by pulling insults out of your ass.

Memo: humans, especially in very emotive states are not rational thinkers. It's not rational to think that some arbitrary person is exceptional, but we do, and it just proves how rationalism is not perfect.

Memo: It proves that humans in very emotive states are not perfect or rational. It doesn't prove that we should throw away rationality at all.

Of course I did. I'm a total jerk and I use women all the time. Naturally, I can tell when I see the activities of a woman who behaves like I do. ;)
Lol, but do you really not think that it's possible that she is not over her ex?

I'm just pointing out that just because a long term romance is unlikely doesn't mean he can't have some fun out of this situation.
Is Chellis being her dildo your idea of him having fun?

Anti-woman agenda? LOL. Yeah. Uhuh. How dare I suggest that hey, women are just as bastardly as men are.
I agree that women can be just as bad as men. I just don't agree with using this thread to mention the fact.

Memo: It proves that humans in very emotive states are not perfect or rational. It doesn't prove that we should throw away rationality at all.
Damn, you saw right through my agenda. ;)

Ermm... She gave me her correct number, and we ended up hanging out... so wtf mate?

The second quote is posted by "Defiantland's Success With Girls", therefore I was declaring how angry I am with the whole "got her number, called her, and it was her real number", seeing as of the 5 phone numbers I've received, they've ALL been fake.

Lol, but do you really not think that it's possible that she is not over her ex?


Oh, it's likely. It's also likely that she uses people without being conscious of the fact. Most people are just as happy to lie to themselves as others - makes it easier, really. But it doesn't change the reality of the situation.

Is Chellis being her dildo your idea of him having fun?

It's better than some things. It's really up to him, all I was doing was pointing out the possibility.

I agree that women can be just as bad as men. I just don't agree with using this thread to mention the fact.

Well, we just have to disagree. I think this thread is the perfect place! Whenever someones getting excessively depressed, frustrated because of misguided concepts of romance it just tickles me down to the bone to spice things up with a dose of pessimistic realism. :)

Damn, you saw right through my agenda. ;)

I have X-Ray Vision. Lots of fun at parties!

Oh, it's likely. It's also likely that she uses people without being conscious of the fact. Most people are just as happy to lie to themselves as others - makes it easier, really. But it doesn't change the reality of the situation.
Pure cynicism!

Well, we just have to disagree. I think this thread is the perfect place! Whenever someones getting excessively depressed, frustrated because of misguided concepts of romance it just tickles me down to the bone to spice things up with a dose of pessimistic realism.
Misguided or not, I urge sensitivity. I remember what it was like to be his age and in situations like this. Because it was only two years ago for me.

Pure cynicism!


Misguided or not, I urge sensitivity. I remember what it was like to be his age and in situations like this. Because it was only two years ago for me.

I am being sensitive! I'm giving my no-bullshit opinion for him to consider or reject, just like everyone else. I admit I could be wrong, I don't know the situation, but I've been there - who hasn't? I also remember having a total naivete that lead to a lot of trouble that could have been avoided with a little healthy cynicism. I don't think Chellis is anywhere near as naive as I was though.

Anyway, theres no need to tiptoe, you're acting like he's suicidal and that I'm advocating a straight razor. He made this thread for NS General opinions, not emotional counseling! Where there is demand, so there shall be supply. Praise be to the market. Amen.

I am being sensitive! I'm giving my no-bullshit opinion for him to consider or reject, just like everyone else. I admit I could be wrong, I don't know the situation, but I've been there - who hasn't? I also remember having a total naivete that lead to a lot of trouble that could have been avoided with a little healthy cynicism. I don't think Chellis is anywhere near as naive as I was though.

Anyway, theres no need to tiptoe, you're acting like he's suicidal and that I'm advocating a straight razor. He made this thread for NS General opinions, not emotional counseling! Where there is demand, so there shall be supply. Praise be to the market. Amen.
Lordy, I'll register that I read this post, but I don't want to respond.

I am being sensitive! I'm giving my no-bullshit opinion for him to consider or reject, just like everyone else. I admit I could be wrong, I don't know the situation, but I've been there - who hasn't? I also remember having a total naivete that lead to a lot of trouble that could have been avoided with a little healthy cynicism. I don't think Chellis is anywhere near as naive as I was though.

Anyway, theres no need to tiptoe, you're acting like he's suicidal and that I'm advocating a straight razor. He made this thread for NS General opinions, not emotional counseling! Where there is demand, so there shall be supply. Praise be to the market. Amen.

Actually, just because of you SB, I'm headed to go hang myself. :P

So how do you feel now. And who is Kim?

I feel ok, though I'm sad that I lowered my normal standards(Because I've been stressed, and I was drunk). It would have been great if her friend wasn't cockblocking me so hard.

Kim would be the original girl. I forgot I hadn't said her name before.

Actually, just because of you SB, I'm headed to go hang myself. :P

I can supply the rope. ;)

Well, she has another boyfriend now; and not the guy she couldn't get over.

I don't know why I am so fucking gullible. God, why do I have to fall for the dumb bitches?

Well, she has another boyfriend now; and not the guy she couldn't get over.

I don't know why I am so fucking gullible. God, why do I have to fall for the dumb bitches?

Well, it's not just you, so the fates aren't singling you out for torment.

Just about everyone has been in your position now and then.

Well, it's not just you, so the fates aren't singling you out for torment.

Just about everyone has been in your position now and then.

Of course, I'm not that ignorant. However, its the fact that I keep letting it happen to me. Its hard to count the number of girls who have lied to me like that, who I let lie to me because I wanted their lies to be true, just to hold onto the little possibility left.

I thought I had cast off being an Intellectual Whore. I gotta work harder.

I hate complications.

To give a brief explanation of the situation: I've known this girl for a while. Not well, but I had met and talked to her a bit, and I was pretty cool with one of her best friends. She was pretty good looking, and seemed like someone I would be interested in.

She had a boyfriend. Some sophomore or some bs like that(she's a sophomore too, btw). I knew she was really into him, so I pretty much put away hope of getting with her. Not dead, but didn't plan on it.

Recently, they broke up. I don't know the exact details of what went on, but some trust issue or something. I had been slowly getting to know her better, talking to her once in a while and stuff before.

Well, last friday, we were both doing a choir concert at school. She was hanging out with two of her friends who I know, one of them the one I know well. All night I hung out with them, and they were all getting pretty close to me(hugging on me for a long time, laying on me, etc). It was all fun and games, but I was really starting to like this girl. I figured, she had broke up with her boyfriend something like a month before, maybe a little less.

So I sent her a thing on myspace the next day asking if she wanted to hang out sometime, she said it sounded awesome, and sent me her phone number. I called her, and we decided to hang out after school on monday.

Finally, on monday, we were hanging out. We were pretty much holding hands wherever we went, and having a lot of fun. We decided to walk home, I found out we live really close to each other. I was putting on my best "game", for lack of a better term, and I thought I was doing really well. She seemed to be having a lot of fun, and it was really cool.

We stopped at a park on the way to our houses, to have a smoke. One thing led to another, and we started kissing.

The rest of the way to our houses, we were kissing and holding hands, and being really playful. I was really happy, because I thought this meant she wanted to be going out with me. I didn't see any reason why not.

Yet, the next day at school(tuesday), she was being distant. I could barely get her to hold my hand, and she rejected me when I went in for a kiss(saying she didn't want to get sick, which I had been for days). I thought it was pretty wierd.

I made it a point to ask her what was going on with her after school. She told me that she was interested in me, but she still wasn't over her ex-boyfriend. I've had multiple people reiterate this to me as well.

Now I'm just really in a bad place. While me and her are pretty much back to just being friends, its just a bit awkward now. I've gone back into a pretty big depression now. I really hate it, because I just wish there was something I could do about it. I like her, she likes me, It just seems wrong that we aren't together. Even more, I have lost pretty much all interest in girls other than her now. I just don't get excited over them now.


1. Get over her and move on.
2. Quit smoking.

1. Get over her and move on.
2. Quit smoking.

1. I am moving on, it just pissed me off that she bs'ed me like that.
2. You quit smoking.

I hate girls like that. The most important thing to do is to not care.

Think about how much better you are than her, and how in ten years, you'd be a parter of a law firm and she'd be married to a drunk wife beater.

And then say, "I don't give a *twinkie*."

And then go out with your guy friends, and then watch bondage porn and imagine it's her being abused.

Use your own discretion on the last part.

I read the first few posts.

Then I read the last page.

I saw comments about drunkeness, her having a new boyfriend. Let me put it in the meanest way I can: Such is life. I've found that being a social outcast lets me watch this stuff and laugh to my self, but to be honest, what the hell?

You're a teenager, while your hormones are raging, this isn't the worst mistake that'll ever happen to you, nor is it the last.

Also, don't beat the hell out of your self in your head becasue you made a mistake.

1. I am moving on, it just pissed me off that she bs'ed me like that.

Alrighty then.

2. You quit smoking.

I have only smoked once in my life, and I happend to be on fire at the time.
I quit as soon as I could get to the garden hose.

Of course, I'm not that ignorant. However, its the fact that I keep letting it happen to me. Its hard to count the number of girls who have lied to me like that, who I let lie to me because I wanted their lies to be true, just to hold onto the little possibility left.

I thought I had cast off being an Intellectual Whore. I gotta work harder.

It's not so much that you're an intellectual whore, it's that you're not getting the goodies.

I hate complications.

To give a brief explanation of the situation: I've known this girl for a while. Not well, but I had met and talked to her a bit, and I was pretty cool with one of her best friends. She was pretty good looking, and seemed like someone I would be interested in.

She had a boyfriend. Some sophomore or some bs like that(she's a sophomore too, btw). I knew she was really into him, so I pretty much put away hope of getting with her. Not dead, but didn't plan on it.

Recently, they broke up. I don't know the exact details of what went on, but some trust issue or something. I had been slowly getting to know her better, talking to her once in a while and stuff before.

Well, last friday, we were both doing a choir concert at school. She was hanging out with two of her friends who I know, one of them the one I know well. All night I hung out with them, and they were all getting pretty close to me(hugging on me for a long time, laying on me, etc). It was all fun and games, but I was really starting to like this girl. I figured, she had broke up with her boyfriend something like a month before, maybe a little less.

So I sent her a thing on myspace the next day asking if she wanted to hang out sometime, she said it sounded awesome, and sent me her phone number. I called her, and we decided to hang out after school on monday.

Finally, on monday, we were hanging out. We were pretty much holding hands wherever we went, and having a lot of fun. We decided to walk home, I found out we live really close to each other. I was putting on my best "game", for lack of a better term, and I thought I was doing really well. She seemed to be having a lot of fun, and it was really cool.

We stopped at a park on the way to our houses, to have a smoke. One thing led to another, and we started kissing.

The rest of the way to our houses, we were kissing and holding hands, and being really playful. I was really happy, because I thought this meant she wanted to be going out with me. I didn't see any reason why not.

Yet, the next day at school(tuesday), she was being distant. I could barely get her to hold my hand, and she rejected me when I went in for a kiss(saying she didn't want to get sick, which I had been for days). I thought it was pretty wierd.

I made it a point to ask her what was going on with her after school. She told me that she was interested in me, but she still wasn't over her ex-boyfriend. I've had multiple people reiterate this to me as well.

Now I'm just really in a bad place. While me and her are pretty much back to just being friends, its just a bit awkward now. I've gone back into a pretty big depression now. I really hate it, because I just wish there was something I could do about it. I like her, she likes me, It just seems wrong that we aren't together. Even more, I have lost pretty much all interest in girls other than her now. I just don't get excited over them now.


She's on the rebound. Relationships that start on the rebound seldom last and cause a great deal of heartache for both people. If you like her as a person, then be her friend. She could probably use one. This means don't push things.

It takes time to recover from a breakup, no matter who started it. Sometimes a year or more. If you don't want to wait that long, look elsewhere. If you don't want to look elsewhere, prepare to wait.

She's on the rebound. Relationships that start on the rebound seldom last and cause a great deal of heartache for both people. If you like her as a person, then be her friend. She could probably use one. This means don't push things.

It takes time to recover from a breakup, no matter who started it. Sometimes a year or more. If you don't want to wait that long, look elsewhere. If you don't want to look elsewhere, prepare to wait.

Read through threads before responding, plz.

She just got a new boyfriend, not the ex. Screw her.

I hate complications.

To give a brief explanation of the situation: I've known this girl for a while. Not well, but I had met and talked to her a bit, and I was pretty cool with one of her best friends. She was pretty good looking, and seemed like someone I would be interested in.

She had a boyfriend. Some sophomore or some bs like that(she's a sophomore too, btw). I knew she was really into him, so I pretty much put away hope of getting with her. Not dead, but didn't plan on it.

Recently, they broke up. I don't know the exact details of what went on, but some trust issue or something. I had been slowly getting to know her better, talking to her once in a while and stuff before.

Well, last friday, we were both doing a choir concert at school. She was hanging out with two of her friends who I know, one of them the one I know well. All night I hung out with them, and they were all getting pretty close to me(hugging on me for a long time, laying on me, etc). It was all fun and games, but I was really starting to like this girl. I figured, she had broke up with her boyfriend something like a month before, maybe a little less.

So I sent her a thing on myspace the next day asking if she wanted to hang out sometime, she said it sounded awesome, and sent me her phone number. I called her, and we decided to hang out after school on monday.

Finally, on monday, we were hanging out. We were pretty much holding hands wherever we went, and having a lot of fun. We decided to walk home, I found out we live really close to each other. I was putting on my best "game", for lack of a better term, and I thought I was doing really well. She seemed to be having a lot of fun, and it was really cool.

We stopped at a park on the way to our houses, to have a smoke. One thing led to another, and we started kissing.

The rest of the way to our houses, we were kissing and holding hands, and being really playful. I was really happy, because I thought this meant she wanted to be going out with me. I didn't see any reason why not.

Yet, the next day at school(tuesday), she was being distant. I could barely get her to hold my hand, and she rejected me when I went in for a kiss(saying she didn't want to get sick, which I had been for days). I thought it was pretty wierd.

I made it a point to ask her what was going on with her after school. She told me that she was interested in me, but she still wasn't over her ex-boyfriend. I've had multiple people reiterate this to me as well.

Now I'm just really in a bad place. While me and her are pretty much back to just being friends, its just a bit awkward now. I've gone back into a pretty big depression now. I really hate it, because I just wish there was something I could do about it. I like her, she likes me, It just seems wrong that we aren't together. Even more, I have lost pretty much all interest in girls other than her now. I just don't get excited over them now.
Wow that sucks, are you going to try and avoid her?

Wow that sucks, are you going to try and avoid her?

I wasn't going to until this latest bs, I'm just nexting her now.

I wasn't going to until this latest bs, I'm just nexting her now.
Good, give her the arse.

Did you hit on one of her friends as I told you to? Well, now you have even more of a reason, nay, a duty, to do so.