NationStates Jolt Archive

I think it's safe to assume that everyone experiences varying degrees of trouble and stress in life. Maybe there are a select few who float through life untouched by the muck, but for the most part it seems that life can be tedious at best.

I'm one of those people that stays awake all night mulling over every little problem, every little thing that has affected me adversely. I can't let things go and I try to think of the things I could have handled differently or things I could do to get back at people who have wronged me. It's very unhealthy and I wish I could handle stress differently. I want to be a more cheerful, positive person who can enjoy the brighter side of life.

So what I want to know is how others handle all the stress and crap that life tosses around. What do you do to turn those frowns into smiles? How do you change your outlook from a negative one to a positive one? Where is the silver lining and how do I find it?

i run or write or talk to peopl,my friends have gotten used to me doing this by now( they know that when the pick up the phone and i say " sorry but i need to rant for a moment...")
they just laugh and listen most of the time when iam done they offer pritty good advice too.
when i can i run in the rain

It depends on what's upsetting me and what I am stressed about. I try to take action to reduce any stress that I have, if however it's something I have no control over I try to remind myself that nothing I can do will change anything and that worry in itself is a pretty useless hobby. I drink some hot tea, think about the things in my life I wouldn't change for anything in the world and go to sleep.

If my mind won't "shut up" so that I can sleep, I try to write down everything that is bothering me, sometimes putting things on paper gets them out of my head.

One way that my 4 year old explained to me to try to fine the 'bright side' is to think of the worst case senario and be thankful that it's not true.

For example, today I woke up with a migraine and she says "at least you have a head that can hurt, some people get decapitated by terrorists"........she is right you know.

It depends on what's upsetting me and what I am stressed about. I try to take action to reduce any stress that I have, if however it's something I have no control over I try to remind myself that nothing I can do will change anything and that worry in itself is a pretty useless hobby. I drink some hot tea, think about the things in my life I wouldn't change for anything in the world and go to sleep.

If my mind won't "shut up" so that I can sleep, I try to write down everything that is bothering me, sometimes putting things on paper gets them out of my head.

One way that my 4 year old explained to me to try to fine the 'bright side' is to think of the worst case senario and be thankful that it's not true.

For example, today I woke up with a migraine and she says "at least you have a head that can hurt, some people get decapitated by terrorists"........she is right you know.

Once again your four-year old is brilliant. I've noticed children tend to get over things a lot easier than most adults I know. I used to try writing to deal with depression when I was a teenager. "Dear Diary...", but perhaps I could take up writing a journal. The letting-go part seems to be the hardest.

How do I deal with stress? I run.

I run all over campus. I never take the same route. I'll run as long as I feel stress. I burn it off. Just to clear my mind. If I've had an especially stressful day, I could be gone a few hours.

You just need some escape. It's different for everyone. For me, it's running. For you, it could be something different.

I deal with stress by playing violent video games, reading Calvin and Hobbes, or going for a nice 5 mile jog (unless its summer, then about 2 miles before the Texas heat gets me)

Once again your four-year old is brilliant. I've noticed children tend to get over things a lot easier than most adults I know. I used to try writing to deal with depression when I was a teenager. "Dear Diary...", but perhaps I could take up writing a journal. The letting-go part seems to be the hardest.

You know, I'm starting to think that Smunkee's whole family is one giant Dalai Lama reincarnation.

I deal with stress by playing violent video games, reading Calvin and Hobbes, or going for a nice 5 mile jog (unless its summer, then about 2 miles before the Texas heat gets me)

Texas heat...ptah!

Texas heat is dry. Michigan heat is wet.

wet=torture

I used to do that by pulling out the sniper rifle and wasting everyone on Grand Theft Auto. It got a little scary because I began to think really hard about going out and getting a real one. I quit playing that game.

Texas heat...ptah!

Texas heat is dry. Michigan heat is wet.

wet=torture
no Arizona heat is dry, Texas heat sucks a big one, not as bad as Oklahoma heat though last summer my kids conned me into going to the zoo it was 80F and 60% humidity, I thought I was going to die. :(

Texas heat...ptah!

Texas heat is dry. Michigan heat is wet.

wet=torture
Dallas humidity is damned high. And a 110 degree day is a 110 degree day. Sucks becuase they are mainly in August and September, right when football starts.

I think it's safe to assume that everyone experiences varying degrees of trouble and stress in life. Maybe there are a select few who float through life untouched by the muck, but for the most part it seems that life can be tedious at best.

I'm one of those people that stays awake all night mulling over every little problem, every little thing that has affected me adversely. I can't let things go and I try to think of the things I could have handled differently or things I could do to get back at people who have wronged me. It's very unhealthy and I wish I could handle stress differently. I want to be a more cheerful, positive person who can enjoy the brighter side of life.

So what I want to know is how others handle all the stress and crap that life tosses around. What do you do to turn those frowns into smiles? How do you change your outlook from a negative one to a positive one? Where is the silver lining and how do I find it?
I used to do exactly what you are talking about. Dwelled on the past and all the people who had done me harm. Blamed everyone and everything but myself. I sought revenge, and I was full of hate and anger. I disconnected from my friends and my long time marriage ended in divorce. I ended up hating myself and the life I had forged. When I went to bed, I prayed that I wouldn't wake up the next day. I was emotional, physically, mentally and spiritually bankrupt.

That was just over five years ago.

Today, I hate no one. I have a peace and a serenity that I never thought was possible. As soon as I realized that there is a God, and I am not it, my life started to improve. The Serenity Prayer helps for sure. Today, when something goes wrong, I have to understand what part I played. I have learned that when I forgive someone, I set the prisoner free. In the past, I didn't realize that I was the prisoner.

"Acceptance is the answer to all my problems today. When I am disturbed, it is because I find some person, place, thing or situation - some fact of my life - unacceptable to me, and I can find no serenity until I accept that person, place, thing or situation as being exactly the way it is supposed to be at this moment."

There is more, but that should be a good start if you have the willingness to change.

no Arizona heat is dry, Texas heat sucks a big one, not as bad as Oklahoma heat though last summer my kids conned me into going to the zoo it was 80F and 60% humidity, I thought I was going to die. :(

Only 60%? I'm disappointed. I thought you would be tougher than that.

:p

I used to do that by pulling out the sniper rifle and wasting everyone on Grand Theft Auto. It got a little scary because I began to think really hard about going out and getting a real one. I quit playing that game.
I dont like playing that game by myself either, I usually play it with a group of people and we take turns. But I ment playing Halo2 on xbox live because it really does make you focus only on the game at hand for that short amount of time.

well, in my defense I was about 50lbs heavier than I am now.

Dallas humidity is damned high. And a 110 degree day is a 110 degree day. Sucks becuase they are mainly in August and September, right when football starts.

Still, 110 is mush more bearible if the humidity isn't near 95% consistently, as it is here.

Granted, texas is hot. But some places have much higher heat indexes (florida comes to mind).

Distraction, distraction, distraction. Rituals of some sort like tea or coffee, jogging/running as mentioned above. And then when I'm in the mood for brooding I get on a forum and gripe so as to spare the people I interact with in the real world the trouble. Oh, and shooting.:) When I'm really stressed I go somewhere safe and private and pop off a few rounds at some unsuspecting bottles:D :mp5:

I used to do that by pulling out the sniper rifle and wasting everyone on Grand Theft Auto. It got a little scary because I began to think really hard about going out and getting a real one. I quit playing that game.

Don't do that! I'd have no one to cleanse my colon!

Still, 110 is mush more bearible if the humidity isn't near 95% consistently, as it is here.

Granted, texas is hot. But some places have much higher heat indexes (florida comes to mind).
ech, yes. It was high humidity in Illinois when I lived their, but it seemed more bearable, probably because I spent most of my youth playing in a forest , a public pool, or my neighbors airconditioned basement. We do have a very nice pool in our backyard and it is rather windy back their so it isnt completely unbearable.

I used to do that by pulling out the sniper rifle and wasting everyone on Grand Theft Auto. It got a little scary because I began to think really hard about going out and getting a real one. I quit playing that game.
have you tried puzzle games? I tend to play them online when my kids are driving me crazy, it's even more fun to play against them and win LOL.

Anyway, there is a much lower risk in a game like Tetris that you will want to go out and buy and odd shaped block, you know?

Dallas humidity is damned high. And a 110 degree day is a 110 degree day. Sucks becuase they are mainly in August and September, right when football starts.
*points and laughs*
try being out side in 90+ heat 14 hours a day in augest in all black. long sleved shirst and heavy denim pants, and to top it all off wear a black hat. and not just standing there eather, working the entire time eather hauling hay bales(they weigh 60 lb+) or showing horses.then you can complain to me about hot. ;)

ech, yes. It was high humidity in Illinois when I lived their, but it seemed more bearable, probably because I spent most of my youth playing in a forest , a public pool, or my neighbors airconditioned basement. We do have a very nice pool in our backyard and it is rather windy back their so it isnt completely unbearable.

Indeed, pools are nice.

Actually, hot tubs are better. My family has one. During the winter, we go out and sit in the freezing cold. Good for stuffy noses too! Just make sure not to get your hair wet.

Dallas humidity is damned high. And a 110 degree day is a 110 degree day. Sucks becuase they are mainly in August and September, right when football starts.

Yeah, I played in Arkansas which is'nt much better. I also spent 7 years in New Orleans. Summer ai'nt no joke there either. Now I just got done spending 2 years in San Francisco(lovely weather) and have just moved to Brooklyn, NY. I've been told that because everything is concrete and brick that it gets damned hot here but I'm not sure these yankees know what hot is. I guess I'll find out.:cool:

*points and laughs*
try being out side in 90+ heat 14 hours a day in augest in all black. long sleved shirst and heavy denim pants, and to top it all off wear a black hat. and not just standing there eather, working the entire time eather hauling hay bales(they weigh 60 lb+) or showing horses.then you can complain to me about hot. ;)

Well, what the hell were you doing out in all black, long sleeves in that weather?!

I used to do exactly what you are talking about. Dwelled on the past and all the people who had done me harm. Blamed everyone and everything but myself. I sought revenge, and I was full of hate and anger. I disconnected from my friends and my long time marriage ended in divorce. I ended up hating myself and the life I had forged. When I went to bed, I prayed that I wouldn't wake up the next day. I was emotional, physically, mentally and spiritually bankrupt.

That was just over five years ago.

Today, I hate no one. I have a peace and a serenity that I never thought was possible. As soon as I realized that there is a God, and I am not it, my life started to improve. The Serenity Prayer helps for sure. Today, when something goes wrong, I have to understand what part I played. I have learned that when I forgive someone, I set the prisoner free. In the past, I didn't realize that I was the prisoner.

"Acceptance is the answer to all my problems today. When I am disturbed, it is because I find some person, place, thing or situation - some fact of my life - unacceptable to me, and I can find no serenity until I accept that person, place, thing or situation as being exactly the way it is supposed to be at this moment."

There is more, but that should be a good start if you have the willingness to change.


Well, for the most part I when I think about the wrongs that somebody did to me and I find it eating away at me I try to think about how karma might bite that person in the butt.

It's a little hard for me to simply accept things as they are and let it go because I would like to think I have control in my life and can possibly change the negativity in my life if I do something better or differently.

Well, what the hell were you doing out in all black, long sleeves in that weather?!
its what i show my horse in, i have to be in long sleves.
not really any other choices:)

Indeed, pools are nice.

Actually, hot tubs are better. My family has one. During the winter, we go out and sit in the freezing cold. Good for stuffy noses too! Just make sure not to get your hair wet.
We have a hottub connected to our pool, it usually flows over (since it is elevated above it and has a fountain) but we turn it on and use it in the winter (which forgot to come this year; there were days in the 70s all through December and January). On new years we used it and I thought that was quite fun.

*points and laughs*
try being out side in 90+ heat 14 hours a day in augest in all black. long sleved shirst and heavy denim pants, and to top it all off wear a black hat. and not just standing there eather, working the entire time eather hauling hay bales(they weigh 60 lb+) or showing horses.then you can complain to me about hot. ;)

I've done it, but not without all the clothing. Do you live in Pennsylvania?

its what i show my horse in, i have to be in long sleves.
not really any other choices:)
anyone in football would agree that football pads on a hot summer day our not enjoyable either. We get water though.

I've done it, but not without all the clothing. Do you live in Pennsylvania?
nope colorado

its what i show my horse in, i have to be in long sleves.
not really any other choices:)

OK. my dads an equestrian. He used to be a jockey. What breed?

Well, for the most part I when I think about the wrongs that somebody did to me and I find it eating away at me I try to think about how karma might bite that person in the butt.

It's a little hard for me to simply accept things as they are and let it go because I would like to think I have control in my life and can possibly change the negativity in my life if I do something better or differently.

Well, perhaps you don't have control?

I know I don't control what happens in the world, or just in the community. We, as people, can only control ourselves. Be it God, Luck, or the holy spaghetti monster, something else controls the world around us. We can only hope to lead our lives as we see fit, and hope others will do the same.

have you tried puzzle games? I tend to play them online when my kids are driving me crazy, it's even more fun to play against them and win LOL.

Anyway, there is a much lower risk in a game like Tetris that you will want to go out and buy and odd shaped block, you know?


I love puzzle games and I have bought a lot of those types. Tetris is unfortunately no longer a challenge for me. It simply got to the point where I would just play it for hours and hours until I forgot what day it was. I'm also trying to avoid video/computer games as a solution because it's to the point where I avoid the real world and my loved ones when I become completely absorbed into what I'm playing.

anyone in football would agree that football pads on a hot summer day our not enjoyable either. We get water though.

i can get water too but.....

nope colorado
I love Colorado. I went to Colorado Springs last summer, stayed at the Braudmoor. It was absolutely beautiful.

nope colorado

No shit. My dads in Ward. Up from Boulder.

anyone in football would agree that football pads on a hot summer day our not enjoyable either. We get water though.

Now THAT is a fact that no one can dispute.

What position did you/do you play?

Well, for the most part I when I think about the wrongs that somebody did to me and I find it eating away at me I try to think about how karma might bite that person in the butt.
He who angers you, controls you.

While you are letting stuff eat away at you, the other person is going on about their life.

It's a little hard for me to simply accept things as they are and let it go because I would like to think I have control in my life and can possibly change the negativity in my life if I do something better or differently.
What kind of control do you have in your life if you are in emotional bondage to the person who harmed you?

Now THAT is a fact that no one can dispute.

What position did you/do you play?
Wide Reciever on offense, Nickleback on defense.

OK. my dads an equestrian. He used to be a jockey. What breed?

arabs and quater horses. my mom has the arab and i have teh quarter.


ugh i hate C-springs

Wide Reciever on offense, Nickleback on defense.


Blah! I played defensive end/tight end. are/were you on a small them also?

arabs and quater horses. my mom has the arab and i have teh quarter.


ugh i hate C-springs

Quarters are cool. I like the sprinters.

Wide Reciever on offense, Nickleback on defense.

Nickelback? You guys play some sort of a funky defense?

My high school team played this funky defense, I could never understand it. But me, being ole dependable Wingback, only had to memorize some blocking assignments. I even got the occasional carry!

arabs and quater horses. my mom has the arab and i have teh quarter.


ugh i hate C-springs
Why you playa hating on C-springs.
and no I wasnt.

Why you playa hating on C-springs.
and no I wasnt.

Word, unit...

Nickelback? You guys play some sort of a funky defense?

My high school team played this funky defense, I could never understand it. But me, being ole dependable Wingback, only had to memorize some blocking assignments. I even got the occasional carry!
Nickleback is a showmanship position. We guard the flats, or drop back into a deep thirds on passing. The only tackles I have to make are running backs, and usually I can gang tackle with a nose.

Why you playa hating on C-springs.
and no I wasnt.
iam not fond of the city....its to windy noisy and such.
i like a few other places better

He who angers you, controls you.

While you are letting stuff eat away at you, the other person is going on about their life.

I'm sure of it.

What kind of control do you have in your life if you are in emotional bondage to the person who harmed you?

Well, obviously none, which is why I am trying to find out how to gain some control of my life. I know I have to let go of things, but at the same time I don't want to ignore my problems.

However, I have to get off of work now so I will be back tomorrow to delve into this further.

Nickleback is a showmanship position. We guard the flats, or drop back into a deep thirds on passing. The only tackles I have to make are running backs, and usually I can gang tackle with a nose.

Ah. What type of defense do you play?

Why you playa hating on C-springs.
and no I wasnt.

I've never spent time there but my frist reaction was: It looks too much like New Mexico so keep driving!

Quarters are cool. I like the sprinters.

i run speed events on mine...he can fly!
shoulda been a race horse

See, I love these threads. We can just sit around and chat about idle things. We can be not just posters, we can be people.

I've never spent time there but my frist reaction was: It looks too much like New Mexico so keep driving!
lol...yah :)
once you get up into the mountians its the best :)

Just a reminder for the hijackers:

Thread Hijacking: Appropiating a thread for a discussion totally unrelated to the original purpose of said thread.

iam not fond of the city....its to windy noisy and such.
i like a few other places better
Oh, Ive never been to the city, besides driving through from the airport.

i run speed events on mine...he can fly!
shoulda been a race horse

Its a feeling you can only have with a quarterhorse. Like a motorcycle, the acceleration. But unfortunately I grew too much so that now me and anything other than a Heinz 57 don't get along. My dad is 5'5" I'm 6'1" go figure.

Just a reminder for the hijackers:

Thread Hijacking: Appropiating a thread for a discussion totally unrelated to the original purpose of said thread.
Sir, to thee I say Bah!

See, I love these threads. We can just sit around and chat about idle things. We can be not just posters, we can be people.

hey who says iam a person?

and if hijacking is an issue we can go hijack my thread:p

hey who says iam a person?

and if hijacking is an issue we can go hijack my thread:p
I don't remember the last time someone was warned about hijacking.

Be that as it may, GNM isn't complaining. If she says to stop, I'll gladly move.

Whoo, Whoo, pull over, this is the thread police! I have nothing better to do.

Its a feeling you can only have with a quarterhorse. Like a motorcycle, the acceleration. But unfortunately I grew too much so that now me and anything other than a Heinz 57 don't get along. My dad is 5'5" I'm 6'1" go figure.
o thats a bummer.
my quarter is an apendix son. hes got gears 1-5 then gears 6-9 thoses last three are sweet:)

Whoo, Whoo, pull over, this is the thread police! I have nothing better to do.

*gives cyberdoughnut*

Now, is that better?