NationStates Jolt Archive

When I was a kid, I always thought it could be real, but recentley, in Biology, I learned that after you die, all the Lysosomes and other enzymes in your body are let loose to decompose your body, and within a couple of days or so (usually how long the zombie needs to be alive again) your body is completley lysed and all that is left after a month or so (not being in a coffin or buried or protected, seeing as zombies are just walking around) is your bones. So, this is my conclusion to the zombie fear, but I;m not sure if it's good, or if you guys have any other theories.

All that stuff you just learned doesn't happen to Communist corpses.

?

Nor to corpses that were bitten by vampires after they died.

www.urbandead
Where the dead rise repeatedly, and either wander around saying Mrh? or start bashing barricades or eating harmanz. bar-HURRRR brazah zambahs!

Anyway, In addition to the chemicals in your body lysing you, the bacterial and mold spores flying around in the air ould eat the decaying tissue, so zombies would eventually be skeletons?

www.urbandead
Where the dead rise repeatedly, and either wander around saying Mrh? or start bashing barricades or eating harmanz. bar-HURRRR brazah zambahs!

ZARBRAHZ!

Nor to corpses that were bitten by vampires after they died.

Yeah, I was thinking it could be caused by a genetic deformation or mutation that when you bite someone, the neurotoxin is released and takes over your body, and that is reasonably believeable.

?
Lenin's corpse lives. Its merely sedated.

Anyway, In addition to the chemicals in your body lysing you, the bacterial and mold spores flying around in the air ould eat the decaying tissue, so zombies would eventually be skeletons?

No. When you die your body can still live, but bacteria turn against you. Though you could always rework it I guess. Though zombies aren't real.

Anyway, In addition to the chemicals in your body lysing you, the bacterial and mold spores flying around in the air ould eat the decaying tissue, so zombies would eventually be skeletons?
I don't care much for your version of reality.

I still think it would be pretty fun bashing the heads off of decaying badies in the streets. :D

Lenin's corpse lives. Its merely sedated.

"Must...Crush...Capitalism..."


On a serious note, I read Zomfic a lot, and the most realistic I've seen is a story where the reanimated were no longer a threat after a year or two - the weather and animals had weathered them and eaten them to death.

I don't care much for your version of reality.

Yeah, it sucks, because it's not really fun

I don't care much for your version of reality.

It's the cycle of life, it doesn't care if you like it or not.

Maybe they already do... :eek:

"Must...Crush...Capitalism..."


On a serious note, I read Zomfic a lot, and the most realistic I've seen is a story where the reanimated were no longer a threat after a year or two - the weather and animals had weathered them and eaten them to death.

Yeah, that would be the biggest factor. Have you seen Dawn of the Dead?

That's a good one...

Yeah, the government is probably keeping a little secret...

I got my goo launcher though :gundge:

If Zombie plague could spread as easily as the films make it out to be, why isn't there a horde of people with rabies swarming outside my house?

ZARBRAHZ!

Bar-HURRR brazah zambah! Bang harmanz!!
http://www.urbandead.com/profile.cgi?id=293076

If Zombie plague could spread as easily as the films make it out to be, why isn't there a horde of people with rabies swarming outside my house?

Lol, because rabies is treatable, and it doesn't make you bite people.

I'd definatley take refuge in Tibet is Zombies attacked.

It's the cycle of life, it doesn't care if you like it or not.
Well it obviously doesn't know who I am! As if your prosiac actuality could fade my inventive perception!

All that stuff you just learned doesn't happen to Communist corpses.
Heh, I love how the hijacks in Kievan-Prussian's threads keep spilling over into others. That's one good thing you can say about his threads. :p

Um, topic?
Don't even want to know. Am scared of zombies. *Hides under blanket*

On a serious note...
The Communist Zombie plague that resides within Lenin's slavia is the greatest threat to the New World Order! How is this not serious?!

It's the cycle of life, it doesn't care if you like it or not.
I wouldn't be so sure, the carbon cycle looked pretty upset when I asked it why the hell I should care where the carbon goes.

So zombies is kind of out of the question, right?

The Communist Zombie plague that resides within Lenin's slavia is the greatest threat to the New World Order! How is this not serious?!

Because secretly Ronald Reagan's corpse has been kept in statis and prepared for such an eventuality. Equipped with the latest capitalist weaponry, uptodate intelligence and a top-hat and cravat, Reagan will fight the evil commie pinkoes with his patented Anti-Communist MachineTM

The Communist Zombie plague that resides within Lenin's slavia is the greatest threat to the New World Order! How is this not serious?!
Maybe it's because there's no such thing as the New World Order? Did you ever think of that?

Now, demons, thats a different story...

Maybe it's because there's no such thing as the New World Order? Did you ever think of that?

Yes that's what we wanted you to think!

MWAHAHAHAHA
Ин Руссиа, ве дринк жодка лике ватер

Yes that's what we wanted you to think!

MWAHAHAHAHA
Ин Руссиа, ве дринк жодка лике ватер

Yes there is....but they don't want Zombies.

Now, demons, thats a different story...
Yes.. especially when Nobunaga comes back and leads those pesky Japs to victory against America.. It will happen! You heard it here first! Unless you heard it someplace else..:(

Face it, communism is wiped out, and the only thing keeping orderin the universe is the libertarian.

So zombies is kind of out of the question, right?

Yes, dear. They are.

Yes.. especially when Nobunaga comes back and leads those pesky Japs to victory against America.. It will happen! You heard it here first! Unless you heard it someplace else..:(

RAISE DA ROOF, HAIL TOJO

Yes there is....but they don't want Zombies.
In the West zombies eat you, in Soviet Union you eat zombies.

In the West zombies eat you, in Soviet Union you eat zombies.

Eww, eating them?

Eww, eating them?

That's sicker then the Matrix's liquidifying the dead to feed the living.

Face it, communism is wiped out, and the only thing keeping orderin the universe is the libertarian.
As in American Libertarianism? Or the proper Proudhon-stylee libertarian socialism? It doesn't matter.. Jean Reno can't save you!

That's sicker then the Matrix's liquidifying the dead to feed the living.

Tru Dat

As in American Libertarianism? Or the proper Proudhon-stylee libertarian socialism? It doesn't matter.. Jean Reno can't save you!

libertarian socialism, HOLMES

LIKE UBER CIVIL RIGHTS

Now, demons, thats a different story...

Demons are cool.

Yeah, they're like on fire and have swords and wipes and stuff

Because secretly Ronald Reagan's corpse has been kept in statis and prepared for such an eventuality. Equipped with the latest capitalist weaponry, uptodate intelligence and a top-hat and cravat, Reagan will fight the evil commie pinkoes with his patented Anti-Communist MachineTM
Jesus invented Capitalism. The only way to fight back against the Communist Zombie hordes is to align oneself with the Lord!
Maybe it's because there's no such thing as the New World Order? Did you ever think of that?
No, the New World Order exists. You've succumed to Communist Zombie propoganda, despite that its not even understandable! ;)

Lol, because rabies is treatable, and it doesn't make you bite people.

Zombieness is treatable - shooting them in the head :D

Seriously though, is it a myth that rabies makes you bite people then?

Jesus invented Capitalism. The only way to fight back against the Communist Zombie hordes is to align oneself with the Lord!

No, the New World Order exists. You've succumed to Communist Zombie propoganda, despite that its not even understandable! ;)

Don't bring religion into this, please, I want none of that.

Zombieness is treatable - shooting them in the head :D

Seriously though, is it a myth that rabies makes you bite people then?

Yeah, it doesnt make you bite people, unless your a dog, cat or cute furry woodland creature.

That's not treatment, that's extermination :D

Oh shut up with religion, please, I want none of that.
Fine, but it goes with the conspiracy theory...

Fine, but it goes with the conspiracy theory...

Lol, you watch too much History Channel

Jesus invented Capitalism. The only way to fight back against the Communist Zombie hordes is to align oneself with the Lord!

No, the New World Order exists. You've succumed to Communist Zombie propoganda, despite that its not even understandable! ;)

Eh? Jesus was the original commie, the alpha commie! Like the Emperor Darlek but with more egalitarianism and less exterminating.

Yeah, it doesnt make you bite people, unless your a dog, cat or cute furry woodland creature.

That's not treatment, that's extermination :D

The best kind of treatment... :)

So why isn't my house surrounded by a horde of swarming rabid cute furry woodland creatures?

The best kind of treatment... :)

So why isn't my house surrounded by a horde of swarming rabid cute furry woodland creatures?

Because they're all being sold at Petsmart for outrageously low prices, duh!!!

Jesus invented Capitalism. The only way to fight back against the Communist Zombie hordes is to align oneself with the Lord!

No, the New World Order exists. You've succumed to Communist Zombie propoganda, despite that its not even understandable! ;)
Seriously.. How foolish can you be? Marx invented capitalism. It was part of a deal he made with Buddha. In exchange for Marx's soul Buddha promised to increase the sales of Das Manifest der Kommunistischen Partei. Obviously it was some ying and yang thing because before capitalism the book made no sense what so ever.

Please, no religion

I like Karl Marx's hair...

I like Karl Marx's hair...
Well when it comes to fashion the left is Stylin'!

Well when it comes to fashion the left is Stylin'!

For reeeeeel, Socialism is D shiznit. Compare Stalin to Churchill, eh?

Who's the one with the full head of hair?

Well when it comes to fashion the left is Stylin'!
"Big K.P. aien't got nuthin' on me, y'hear?!"
http://www.th.physik.uni-frankfurt.de/~jr/gif/phys/einstein.jpg

I am in LOVE with a thread that starts off with a question about the biological possibility of zombies, wends its way through the religious implications of capitalism and finds itself discussing the hairstyles of the communist and famous, with a passing nod at the relative health of pet store animals.

"Big K.P. aien't got nuthin' on me, y'hear?!"
http://www.th.physik.uni-frankfurt.de/~jr/gif/phys/einstein.jpg

Ye ye ye, but da dawg dat began it al', K.P.

I am in LOVE with a thread that starts off with a question about the biological possibility of zombies, wends its way through the religious implications of capitalism and finds itself discussing the hairstyles of the communist and famous.

Das just how I roll dawg

When I was a kid, I always thought it could be real, but recentley, in Biology, I learned that after you die, all the Lysosomes and other enzymes in your body are let loose to decompose your body, and within a couple of days or so (usually how long the zombie needs to be alive again) your body is completley lysed and all that is left after a month or so (not being in a coffin or buried or protected, seeing as zombies are just walking around) is your bones. So, this is my conclusion to the zombie fear, but I;m not sure if it's good, or if you guys have any other theories.
Zombies already plague the earth. They're the sort who watch reality television and still can't believe Nick and Jessica broke up.

Because they're all being sold at Petsmart for outrageously low prices, duh!!!

That would explain a lot...

I assume the same would happen witha zombie plague, in which case I'll be first in line to get my most delightfuly rotting corpse.

Zombies already plague the earth. They're the sort who watch reality television and still can't believe Nick and Jessica broke up.

Yeah, I can see that. Also the girls that take the OC seriously.

That would explain a lot...

I assume the same would happen witha zombie plague, in which case I'll be first in line to get my most delightfuly rotting corpse.

I'd name mine Mr. Jellymuffincakes Junior

I'd definatley take refuge in Tibet is Zombies attacked.

You obviously don't know the truth about the Dalai Lama.

That would explain a lot...

I assume the same would happen witha zombie plague, in which case I'll be first in line to get my most delightfuly rotting corpse.

LOL, what if they actually did, and for food for the zombies, they just had a vat filled with live people, and they just grabbed one out and stuffed it into a bag.
LOL

I'd name mine Mr. Jellymuffincakes Junior

Mine's gonna be Princess Hepzibar butterfly III, awww...

EDIT: And it's gonna have this adorable blue dress

"Big K.P. aien't got nuthin' on me, y'hear?!"
http://www.th.physik.uni-frankfurt.de/~jr/gif/phys/einstein.jpg
I see your Einstein and I raise you Peter Kropotkin's Beard!
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Image:PeterKropotkin.jpg

You obviously don't know the truth about the Dalai Lama.

Oh, I know. That's why I started this thread.

(bites head off of live person)

You obviously don't know the truth about the Dalai Lama.

Are you kidding? How long has Tibet been successfully fighting off the hoards of communist Chinese zombies? That would be the place to BE in a Zombie attack.

LOL, what if they actually did, and for food for the zombies, they just had a vat filled with live people, and they just grabbed one out and stuffed it into a bag.
LOL

No different to hotdog meat then...

I see your Einstein and I raise you Peter Kropotkin's Beard!
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Image:PeterKropotkin.jpg

Disqualified - that's obviously a massive fungal growth. He seems quite pleased with it.

I see your Einstein and I raise you Peter Kropotkin's Beard!
"Mr. Kropotikin has embelished his face with a very nice beard, but I must say that my name, which has been given to side burns, pwns him."
http://mariah.stonemarche.org/livhis/women/genburnsides.jpg

I see your Einstein and I raise you Peter Kropotkin's Beard!
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Image:PeterKropotkin.jpg

MARCUS GARVEY, I CHOOSE YOU!!!

http://i.b5z.net/i/u/378672/i/MARCUS_GARVEY_3_ezr.jpg

Disqualified - that's obviously a massive fungal growth. He seems quite pleased with it.
Oh your so full of shit! That beard is second only to Rasputin's and your telling me it's some kind of mushroom? A man's facial hair is indictive of is worth as a revolutionary and you'd write him off because of your petty bumfluff envy?

No-one make me mention Chuck Norris's beard - It'll beat up all the others.

Bugger

OMG, Marcus Garvey is THE KOOLEST, I win, there is no point in trying to beat me, accept your defeat and walk home, WALK!!!

OMG, Marcus Garvey is THE KOOLEST, I win, there is no point in trying to beat me, accept your defeat and walk home, WALK!!!

OK....enough of that.

What about Chinese zombies?! Instead of your brain...they want your KI!

Demons are cool.

Well, the ones with tentacles are ok, as are the ones that look like women with bat wings, I suppose.

Are you kidding? How long has Tibet been successfully fighting off the hoards of communist Chinese zombies? That would be the place to BE in a Zombie attack.

Well, Xizang ("Tibet"), as a modern territorial entity, has gone the way of Nepal and Bhutan. The projected territories of this former Qing province fall under the de facto administration of Hind, but administrative scope is restricted at best, and much of this land effectively remains as it was in the time of Demetrius II - under exclusively tribal control. If, by "hordes of communist Chinese", you’re referring to the displaced Yunnan and South Sichuan Mon, it would be wise to note that the Calvinized eastern indigens (despite rather poorly-concealed Genevan military assistance) – if escalating influx rate is of any worth - have not "successfully" dissuaded ongoing settlement. Of course, such decisive routs as the recent Zàkhung massacre (albeit perpetrated by rather Hellenized hill-dwellers) may stand to counter this trend.

Well, the ones with tentacles are ok, as are the ones that look like women with bat wings, I suppose.

Very true. The ones with eyes on stalks tend to be a bit standoffish IMHO.

Brainzzz!!!!

Anyway, In addition to the chemicals in your body lysing you, the bacterial and mold spores flying around in the air ould eat the decaying tissue, so zombies would eventually be skeletons?

Don't write that.

You'll give him nightmares.

Well, the ones with tentacles are ok, as are the ones that look like women with bat wings, I suppose.

Yeah, I don't like the ones that are like old wrinkly women with bat wings. But the ones that are on fire, with horns and that have flaming shields and wipes and stuff are kool.

Don't write that.

You'll give him nightmares.

Oh, who?

Anyway, I was planning on relieving his nightmares, assuring him that Zombies won't hover around his bed trying to rip his brains out with his teeth, that are decaying, and probably have gingavitis and plaque.

Well, Xizang ("Tibet"), as a modern territorial entity, has gone the way of Nepal and Bhutan. The projected territories of this former Qing province fall under the de facto administration of Hind, but administrative scope is restricted at best, and much of this land effectively remains as it was in the time of Demetrius II - under exclusively tribal control. If, by "hordes of communist Chinese", you’re referring to the displaced Yunnan and South Sichuan Mon, it would be wise to note that the Calvinized eastern indigens (despite rather poorly-concealed Genevan military assistance) – if escalating influx rate is of any worth - have not "successfully" dissuaded ongoing settlement. Of course, such decisive routs as the recent Zàkhung massacre (albeit perpetrated by rather Hellenized hill-dwellers) may stand to counter this trend.


I think that deserves a round of applause!!! :D

Quite obviously yes.