NationStates Jolt Archive


I hate myself...

New Isabelle
05-03-2006, 17:07
So I'm engaged and as some of you know my girl lives in Cali while I'm in DC. I havn't seen her since January and I made out with another girl last night... she ended up hooking up with another guy because despite the alcohol I realised I needed to get the F*** out... and right now I hate myself...
Kanabia
05-03-2006, 17:09
Eh, it was the booze talking and you only made out with her. You feel bad about it and loyal to your girl, so in my books you haven't really done anything wrong.
Philosopy
05-03-2006, 17:11
So I'm engaged and as some of you know my girl lives in Cali while I'm in DC. I havn't seen her since January and I made out with another girl last night... she ended up hooking up with another guy because despite the alcohol I realised I needed to get the F*** out... and right now I hate myself...
You'll have to tell your girlfriend, or it'll chew you up forever.

You don't need to hate yourself though. We all make mistakes and do things we regret.
Kanabia
05-03-2006, 17:13
You'll have to tell your girlfriend, or it'll chew you up forever.


Er, maybe, though I would suggest doing so in person.
Letila
05-03-2006, 17:16
Don't feel bad about yourself. You are far more worthy than I could ever hope to be. You have plenty of good qualities that balance out this one act, I'm sure.
AllCoolNamesAreTaken
05-03-2006, 17:16
There is no "atta boy!" poll response. Also, no "get over it, you're girl's probably cheating on you anyways", and no "it doesn't count- it's never cheating when you're in a different area code, let alone another state!" option.

Hence, I am unable to vote.
Philosopy
05-03-2006, 17:17
Er, maybe, though I would suggest doing so in person.
That would probably be better, although I'm not sure how on earth you would soften the blow. You probably have to just get it over with and hope she loves you enough to forgive you/understand it was a mistake.
Lady Avon
05-03-2006, 17:18
Yeah, dont feel too bad, as long as you did'nt go all the way, and you did'nt have feelings for this gal that you made out with, I would'nt sweat it. Its not like she'll ever find out, that is as long as you dont tell her....so why is it you guys are so far apart???? Is it by choice or is it an internet relationship?????? :fluffle: :mp5: :sniper: :upyours:
Laerod
05-03-2006, 17:20
So I'm engaged and as some of you know my girl lives in Cali while I'm in DC. I havn't seen her since January and I made out with another girl last night... she ended up hooking up with another guy because despite the alcohol I realised I needed to get the F*** out... and right now I hate myself...My ex broke up with her fiancé for me. I hated myself about it too. Depending on how your girl would react, I'd either be honest or forget the whole thing.
AllCoolNamesAreTaken
05-03-2006, 17:21
Yeah, dont feel too bad, as long as you did'nt go all the way, and you did'nt have feelings for this gal that you made out with, I would'nt sweat it. Its not like she'll ever find out, that is as long as you dont tell her....so why is it you guys are so far apart???? Is it by choice or is it an internet relationship?????? :fluffle: :mp5: :sniper: :upyours:

A first post gun smilie. I called it, I get your soul!!! HAHAHA! Another one to my collection. At this rate, I'm going to make Satan look bad at this.
Lobete
05-03-2006, 17:21
It could have been a lot worse. You got drunk and made-out with a girl.
You will probably want to tell your girlfriend, but hopefully she will understand how sorry you feel about it.

Good luck
New Isabelle
05-03-2006, 17:26
She's still in school and is saving money by living w/ her parents... we met while working at the same restaurant...

I keep trying to rationalize the whole thing and then telling myself that I'm rationalizing and that makes me a horrible person..F*** SH** in 4 years ive never been close to doing something like this... F*** F*** F*** F***

AAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!!


ok sorry... i just need an emotional vent and none of my guy buds who could handle this are within driving distance or awake...
Intangelon
05-03-2006, 17:28
So I'm engaged and as some of you know my girl lives in Cali while I'm in DC. I havn't seen her since January and I made out with another girl last night... she ended up hooking up with another guy because despite the alcohol I realised I needed to get the F*** out... and right now I hate myself...
Go with that feeling. Learn. Move on.
The Similized world
05-03-2006, 17:36
So I'm engaged and as some of you know my girl lives in Cali while I'm in DC. I havn't seen her since January and I made out with another girl last night... she ended up hooking up with another guy because despite the alcohol I realised I needed to get the F*** out... and right now I hate myself...Drunk & far apart, I don't see the big problem.

When I've had long distance relationships, it's always been a deal that a bit on the side was acceptable. As long as it's just a shag & a few beers.

Maybe you should talk to the significant other about it & quit squirming?
Ashmoria
05-03-2006, 17:45
everyone is subject to temptation

consider it a test that you passed and resolve to avoid temptation in the future.

dont tell your fiancee. she doesnt need to worry about you.
Im a native
05-03-2006, 17:50
kick yourself really hard over and over again for being a stupid drunk idiot.

learn from your mistakes.

be honest with your fiance'. If you are honest and truly sorry, she will likely forgive you.

If not, then here's one of life's hard lessons for you, and you can use it in your next relationship so you don't F*** that one up.
Whereyouthinkyougoing
05-03-2006, 17:55
Well, it may not have been the smartest move, but seeing how much you're beating yourself up about it (I couldn't even vote, seeing how I wouldn't call you a dick) I guess you realized that yourself.

So, just don't do it again and you'll be fine.
Lobete
05-03-2006, 17:55
so which option on the poll is the nice one?
is it "other... you dick?"
Dinaverg
05-03-2006, 17:57
so which option on the poll is the nice one?
is it "other... you dick?"

*shrug* That's what I picked, why not?
Skeet-Face
05-03-2006, 17:58
Ok. Here is some advice. Quit being a bitch. Tell the truth and ask for forgiveness. u didnt F her or anything.
Intangelon
05-03-2006, 17:58
Drunk & far apart, I don't see the big problem.

When I've had long distance relationships, it's always been a deal that a bit on the side was acceptable. As long as it's just a shag & a few beers.

Maybe you should talk to the significant other about it & quit squirming?
God bless realism. Thank you -- I wanted to say that, but chose the lame way out in my initial post. Well said.
Intangelon
05-03-2006, 18:01
Wait a minute -- I misread the original post. All you did was play tonsil hockey? And that's all SHE did? Shit, man -- confess, acknowledge that it's no big deal if the two of you are really serious, and get on with life. You're 3000 miles away from one another. So long as dick is not entering puss or mouth, you're bleeding off your need to be with each other.

Of course, there is the possibility that either of you could fall for the local snog-buddy. Have to watch that.
Heron-Marked Warriors
05-03-2006, 18:14
You haven't done anything that bad, so quit beating yourself up. I wouldn't advise you to make a habit of it, but it's a one-off and you clearly feel bad over it.

If I was you, I would tell your gf, apologise and then, more than likely, the whole thing will be over and done with.

Long distance relationships are hard, and you can't expect to be perfect (doesn't mean you shouldn't try to be, though).

So stop hating yourself.

...you dick.
Stolen Dreams
05-03-2006, 18:14
I wouldn't want my significant other to withhold things from me, just as I'd expect her to expect me to tell her about things she should to know.
And this would be such a thing.

You acted like an utter arse, but you realise (I think.. ) what you did was wrong - which doesn't make it alright, but in my eyes it makes you slightly more honest than most other people.

Tell her. She shouldn't have to hear it from someone else. Dark secrets will either destroy your relationship, or drive you insane.


Stolen Dreams - dedicated to making women happy since 2001. :fluffle:
Stolen Dreams
05-03-2006, 18:17
...you can't expect to be perfect...

If being perfect means being honest to your girlfriend, isn't perfection something everyone should be striving for? :rolleyes:
Heron-Marked Warriors
05-03-2006, 18:18
If being perfect means being honest to your girlfriend, isn't perfection something everyone should be striving for? :rolleyes:

But that isn't the only thing needed for a perfect relationship.
Celtlund
05-03-2006, 18:19
So I'm engaged and as some of you know my girl lives in Cali while I'm in DC. I havn't seen her since January and I made out with another girl last night... she ended up hooking up with another guy because despite the alcohol I realised I needed to get the F*** out... and right now I hate myself...

I know how it is. You hate yourself for not staying and doing more than making out. Don't worry about it, you will have other opportunities to do more than just make out. :D
Stolen Dreams
05-03-2006, 18:26
But that isn't the only thing needed for a perfect relationship.

Granted, but we are talking about this one thing now. Infidelity, as I'm sure some people would call it.
If you're not faithful to your partner, then why are you in a relationship in the first place?
Heron-Marked Warriors
05-03-2006, 18:32
Granted, but we are talking about this one thing now. Infidelity, as I'm sure some people would call it.
If you're not faithful to your partner, then why are you in a relationship in the first place?

So you believe that even the tiniest infidelity is automatic cause for a relationship to end?

Seems a bit drastic to me. We all make mistakes, do things we regret in the heat of the moment.
Mariehamn
05-03-2006, 18:35
So you believe that even the tiniest infidelity is automatic cause for a relationship to end?
No, but I do think that your women should be revered as a sex goddess.
Heron-Marked Warriors
05-03-2006, 18:37
No, but I do think that your women should be revered as a sex goddess.

Agreed.
Dubya 1000
05-03-2006, 19:15
So I'm engaged and as some of you know my girl lives in Cali while I'm in DC. I havn't seen her since January and I made out with another girl last night... she ended up hooking up with another guy because despite the alcohol I realised I needed to get the F*** out... and right now I hate myself...

Yay, another suicide thread! :D
New Isabelle
05-03-2006, 19:21
Yay, another suicide thread! :D

Nah its not that bad, my life(edit) isn't defined by my relationship... I really just needed an emotional vent cause I was/am pissed at myself- its just going to take a couple days for me to come to terms with the fact that i'm the same as every horny douchebag out there and that i need to move on... so i f****** up... it sucks, i'm a worse person for doing it, but i need to learn from my mistake and devote the rest of my life to my girl

EDIT: i was still drunk when i made this thread so i misspelled some crap... sorry
New Isabelle
05-03-2006, 19:23
Is there any way to delete a thread you made?

I'm just wasting everyone's time
Dinaverg
05-03-2006, 19:56
Nah its not that bad, my left isn't defined by my relationship...

What about your right?