NationStates Jolt Archive

A combination of high fever, cold medication, and general irritability has rendered me unfit to comment on anything political. I start frothing at the mouth, and having delusions. Yes, that IS different than usual:). So, in the interest of not getting myself forum-banned, or saying something I'll regret, I figured we could just tell one another what has been happening in RL!

Please people....keep it non-political...please!

I just got back from my US Politics class, in which we debated the Patriot Act, gun control, abortion, separation of church and state, etc. Speaking of those...

A combination of high fever, cold medication, and general irritability has rendered me unfit to comment on anything political. I start frothing at the mouth, and having delusions. Yes, that IS different than usual:). So, in the interest of not getting myself forum-banned, or saying something I'll regret, I figured we could just tell one another what has been happening in RL!

Please people....keep it non-political...please!
IRL? Hmm. Not much, actually. I've started back running and working out with the weights. Trying to build myself back up just in case I have to undergo chemotherepy or radiation, and so I can quit smoking. Other than that, same old same old.

I got a new dog, a black lab./beagle mix that my family and I named Argus. He's a pretty good dog so far, except for the fact that he keeps chewing up shoes. That, and I'm still learning how to play the bagpipes.

Me? Generally moping about, feeling sorry for myself, being depressed, thinking far too much, and avoiding doing anything.

I just got back from my US Politics class, in which we debated the Patriot Act, gun control, abortion, separation of church and state, etc. Speaking of those...
*head explodes, spewing mucus all over the screen*

blah. RL sucks and now you want to take away my politics?

i've been having lots of arguments about statistics recently. they should only be allowed to prove what I want them to prove. :mad:

Doing the mock Leaving Cert exams. Over tomorrow, woot.
After the biology and maths paper 2 :(

Doing the mock Leaving Cert exams. Over tomorrow, woot.
After the biology and maths paper 2 :(
You reminded me about my world history project. Dang you!

Me? Generally moping about, feeling sorry for myself, being depressed, thinking far too much, and avoiding doing anything.
Ay Nadkor, that doesn't sound good:( Do you usually come out of these funks on your own, or do you need to do something? (which is always hard when one feels like doing nothing at all...)

nothing unusual or important. just a recent threesome while on magic mushrooms, getting wedding stuff ready, going to SoCal this weekend to get the marriage certificate, my grandfather passed away recently, finally got hooked up with some good marijuana because it has been months that I've had any at all, fighting with my homeowners association because they say a live plant on my front yard is dead while it is not, and playing a lot of my old first person shooters like Quake 3, Unreal Tournament, C&C Renegade, and Half-Life Team Fortress.

Well, I haven't told my bosses at work that I'm leaving yet...I'm kind of hoarding that secret like a plate of really good cookies. I have to tell them by the 15 of March though.

I'm going to be moving into my father's mother's house in Edmonton, which is a three-acre plot and a kind of run down house...but I'll be close to school, and can overcome this isolation that has gotten me so down. It'll mean a lot less driving, which is great, and it's on the outskirts of the city, so I don't have to deal with the crazy vibes. And 3 acres...lots of space for the kids to play! Huge gardens...yeah, I'm excited. It means a lot of work in the meantime, but I'm blocking that out!

Ay Nadkor, that doesn't sound good:( Do you usually come out of these funks on your own, or do you need to do something? (which is always hard when one feels like doing nothing at all...)
Eh...yea, usually it just passes after a while. Could be anything from a couple of days to a few weeks though, so that's never good for anything.

You can probably guess why I'm feeling like I am...so you can understand why it's not the easiest thing to drag yourself out of, because you know the cause most likely isn't going to go away for a while...

Wow that sounds exciting. A big area like that is great for kids. I love to garden and stuff so I'd have a blast with that kind of land.



mmmmm cookies

nothing unusual or important. just a recent threesome while on magic mushrooms,
I used to love mushrooms and weed. But I just can't do it anymore...the last couple of times I was on mushrooms I just felt like I had a high fever...the same kind of spaced-out, weirdly sensitive feeling. I was sure I was poisoning myself...which is essentially true. Same with weed. Nor can I drink very much...I really have learned the lessons taught to me by my hangovers:(

Wedding stuff. Am I the only woman in the world who never cared about having a wedding, or planning for one?

Wedding stuff. Am I the only woman in the world who never cared about having a wedding, or planning for one?

yes. i know a bunch of girls who have been planning since they were 13. of course, they're wacky anyways.

Eh...yea, usually it just passes after a while. Could be anything from a couple of days to a few weeks though, so that's never good for anything. My brother and I are both going through an extended bought of the downs. It always happens around winter, but we should have been 'up' by now. At least we have each other to kind of do reality checks...people who don't go through these kinds of swings don't understand.

You can probably guess why I'm feeling like I am...so you can understand why it's not the easiest thing to drag yourself out of, because you know the cause most likely isn't going to go away for a while...*sigh* Yeah, I know. What did my brother say the other day...ah..."Knowing things could be worse doesn't fucking make my situation seem any better, and I swear I'll tatoo that point onto the chest of the next person who points out that at least I'm not a black woman in the Darfur!"

All I can say is...when the regular coping mechanisms start failing, it's time to reach out for something new. I went to a councilling session for the first time in my life in January, and another one with my husband in Feb. It didn't solve everything, but it DID help.

Wedding stuff. Am I the only woman in the world who never cared about having a wedding, or planning for one?

Yes. In fact by making that statement the women may kick you out of their club. But the feminazis might take you in

I used to love mushrooms and weed. But I just can't do it anymore...the last couple of times I was on mushrooms I just felt like I had a high fever...the same kind of spaced-out, weirdly sensitive feeling. I was sure I was poisoning myself...which is essentially true. Same with weed. Nor can I drink very much...I really have learned the lessons taught to me by my hangovers:(

Wedding stuff. Am I the only woman in the world who never cared about having a wedding, or planning for one?


The only side effect I ever got from shrooms was that I would sometimes get watery eyes while peaking, usually started by laughter but not quitting when the laughter was done. The day after shrooms I always feel wonderful. I don't think I've ever had any kind of hangover from anything other than alcohol, which is why I rarely drink.


As for the wedding, it's all for my girl and her demanding parents. Our personal ceremony isnt going to be anything to stress over or need any more plans than what we are going to say to each other while nude out in a forest somewhere. She didn't want a big wedding but she was interested in getting married. I am happy with just a promise of love and devotion and dont need a certificate, ring or anything to make our union official.

Wow that sounds exciting. A big area like that is great for kids. I love to garden and stuff so I'd have a blast with that kind of land.

mmmmm cookies
Well, and I get to go back to University, having learned a lot as a teacher and a mother, and I'm excited to see how the experience is going to differ from the first time.

For one, my hormones are slightly more under control, and I'm not going to be daydreaming about jumping so and so ALL the time:). Plus I really know what I want to do with my education this time, and I think I'll get a lot better marks, and not skip...cripes, there were some classes I missed more than half of the first time around. I know enough to avoid the loud-mouthed pseudo-educated 'politicians' and hook up with the people who actually get shit done.

I'm very excited...I've also started making contacts with native media production companies with the dream of starting up a dubbing company in native languages, for movies, books (with the little audio cartridges) and so on.

It weird...just knowing I'm getting out of this place is allowing me to think of the future, which is something that has been very difficult for me for the past two years.

Yes. In fact by making that statement the women may kick you out of their club. But the feminazis might take you in
Well, they're more likely to sleep with me anyway, so I'm fine with that:)

As for the wedding, it's all for my girl and her demanding parents. Our personal ceremony isnt going to be anything to stress over or need any more plans than what we are going to say to each other while nude out in a forest somewhere. She didn't want a big wedding but she was interested in getting married. I am happy with just a promise of love and devotion and dont need a certificate, ring or anything to make our union official.
That's so sweet I'm actually gagging:)

A combination of high fever, cold medication, and general irritability has rendered me unfit to comment on anything political. I start frothing at the mouth, and having delusions. Yes, that IS different than usual:). So, in the interest of not getting myself forum-banned, or saying something I'll regret, I figured we could just tell one another what has been happening in RL!

Please people....keep it non-political...please!

Thinking about you, as always. :D

yes. i know a bunch of girls who have been planning since they were 13. of course, they're wacky anyways.
Sounds like it! Too bad we have restrictions on child-brides:)

Well, and I get to go back to University, having learned a lot as a teacher and a mother, and I'm excited to see how the experience is going to differ from the first time.

For one, my hormones are slightly more under control, and I'm not going to be daydreaming about jumping so and so ALL the time:). Plus I really know what I want to do with my education this time, and I think I'll get a lot better marks, and not skip...cripes, there were some classes I missed more than half of the first time around. I know enough to avoid the loud-mouthed pseudo-educated 'politicians' and hook up with the people who actually get shit done.

I'm very excited...I've also started making contacts with native media production companies with the dream of starting up a dubbing company in native languages, for movies, books (with the little audio cartridges) and so on.

It weird...just knowing I'm getting out of this place is allowing me to think of the future, which is something that has been very difficult for me for the past two years.


It all sounds so exciting. The move, the studentship, the dubbing company!

Yeah I bet the future will be full of cookies.

Thinking about you, as always. :D
Liar!

BTW, I'm typing while naked, as the heat I'm generating while feverish is extreme:)

*I'm also looking quite horrid, having been sick for three days running, not eating, and such...you don't actually WANT to visualise this.

My brother and I are both going through an extended bought of the downs. It always happens around winter, but we should have been 'up' by now. At least we have each other to kind of do reality checks...people who don't go through these kinds of swings don't understand.

I wouldn't say I'm like that, where I usually get it in winter and then know roughly when it's going to lift...downs just come and go every now and then. Some stay for a couple of days, some for longer. Just part of life for me...

*sigh* Yeah, I know. What did my brother say the other day...ah..."Knowing things could be worse doesn't fucking make my situation seem any better, and I swear I'll tatoo that point onto the chest of the next person who points out that at least I'm not a black woman in the Darfur!"

Ha...yea, that's pretty much how I feel most of the time. Doesn't help that I'm just a bit too scared to tell anybody why I'm feeling like I do, so when I say "it's nothing...." they just think it can't be anything important.

All I can say is...when the regular coping mechanisms start failing, it's time to reach out for something new. I went to a councilling session for the first time in my life in January, and another one with my husband in Feb. It didn't solve everything, but it DID help.
Well...I don't really have any coping mechanisms, I don't think. I just tend to stumble through, hoping it's going to go away.

That's so sweet I'm actually gagging:)

Choke on it! Choke on it! :D just practicing for when you come to see us

Well today in North Wales it has been snowing, but being the courageous Student Teachers that we are, my friend and I battled our way through the blizzard on the A55 until we hit the solid traffic due to an accident, and waited there for about 30 minutes, when we recieved phone calls from our respective schools, saying 'Sorry we forgot to ring you earlier, but the school is closed today'. So there we were, stuck in the middle of nowhere, 40 miles from our University in Bangor, having had to have got up at 6, thinking 'Fucking marvellous'. We finally got back to Bangor (and my girlfriend who was still asleep, having not woken up when i left) at 11.30, four and a half hours after we left. For the rest of the day I've been pissing about with my Hallmates. And praying that the school is closed again tommorow.

I wouldn't say I'm like that, where I usually get it in winter and then know roughly when it's going to lift...downs just come and go every now and then. Some stay for a couple of days, some for longer. Just part of life for me... Oh, winter is the only one we can predict. The problem is, trying to track the ups and downs, is that when you're up, you can't even remember what it felt like to be down...it's hazy and unreal. The reverse is true as well.


Ha...yea, that's pretty much how I feel most of the time. Doesn't help that I'm just a bit too scared to tell anybody why I'm feeling like I do, so when I say "it's nothing...." they just think it can't be anything important. Have you talked to Jordi lately? It's good to have someone who can at least understand...


Well...I don't really have any coping mechanisms, I don't think. I just tend to stumble through, hoping it's going to go away.Gah...not good. I'm sure you DO have certain coping mechanisms, but that doesn't necessarily mean they are positive. Do you 'cocoon' when you're down? Isolate yourself, laze about? Eat shitty food, or not eat at all? It's taken me a lifetime of being like this to learn what coping mechanisms I use, and which ones are actually healthy. I can't read, or watch tv when I'm like this...I don't want to go out, or talk to anyone, and my appetite is totally out of whack. Just going for a walk outside is an unbelievable sensation when everything else is just dulled.

Liar!

BTW, I'm typing while naked, as the heat I'm generating while feverish is extreme:)

*I'm also looking quite horrid, having been sick for three days running, not eating, and such...you don't actually WANT to visualise this.

That's hot.

I always want to visualize you.

;)

Choke on it! Choke on it! :D just practicing for when you come to see us
*shivers* You are very, very naughty!

Well today in North Wales it has been snowing, but being the courageous Student Teachers that we are, my friend and I battled our way through the blizzard on the A55 until we hit the solid traffic due to an accident, and waited there for about 30 minutes, when we recieved phone calls from our respective schools, saying 'Sorry we forgot to ring you earlier, but the school is closed today'. So there we were, stuck in the middle of nowhere, 40 miles from our University in Bangor, having had to have got up at 6, thinking 'Fucking marvellous'. We finally got back to Bangor (and my girlfriend who was still asleep, having not woken up when i left) at 11.30, four and a half hours after we left. For the rest of the day I've been pissing about with my Hallmates. And praying that the school is closed again tommorow.Shitty...considering you could have never left bed at all...but ah well! I will do a 'snow dance' for you in honour of your wish for the school to be closed tomorrow:)

Shitty...considering you could have never left bed at all...but ah well! I will do a 'snow dance' for you in honour of your wish for the school to be closed tomorrow:)

Thankyou very much, it's still snowing so it looks like there's a good chance of that happening.

Oh, winter is the only one we can predict. The problem is, trying to track the ups and downs, is that when you're up, you can't even remember what it felt like to be down...it's hazy and unreal. The reverse is true as well.

Yea, I know exactly what you mean.

Have you talked to Jordi lately? It's good to have someone who can at least understand...

A bit, but msn doesn't like me and keeps not letting me on...

Gah...not good. I'm sure you DO have certain coping mechanisms, but that doesn't necessarily mean they are positive. Do you 'cocoon' when you're down? Isolate yourself, laze about? Eat shitty food, or not eat at all? It's taken me a lifetime of being like this to learn what coping mechanisms I use, and which ones are actually healthy. I can't read, or watch tv when I'm like this...I don't want to go out, or talk to anyone, and my appetite is totally out of whack. Just going for a walk outside is an unbelievable sensation when everything else is just dulled.
Most of the time I just wake up and just want to go back to sleep and hope it all goes away. That doesn't work though.

And I just don't feel like going to uni...sitting in a room with 50 other people listening to somebody go on about, say, the development of Parliament in the 14th century isn't my idea of a good thing to do at this moment in time. Even though I love history, and the development of Parliament is something I'm genuinely interested in. I just end up not going to any classes, and spending my time walking round the city centre, or through a park,thinking and depressing myself more.

Then I come home and spend alot of time on the computer, because at least it's somewhere slightly disconnected from reality...

And drinking. When I go out (usually dragged out my mates despite my protests) I end up drinking alot more than I usually would...

I've not been up to anything unusual really - going to my evening seminars, going out at the weekends if I can afford it, watching DVDs and the odd TV program. The snow has made getting about a pain in the arse since I tend to use public transport and/or walk when I can, and the infrastructure suffers badly here since we're not really used to it. Going to see the Ulster Orchestra on Saturday night, which is a nice break from the normal routine.

Nadkor - can't help, I know, but hope this spell passes quickly. I know such words are largely meaningless, but thinking of you anyway :fluffle:

Dude, all you people talk about is drugs and sex... what about guys? Guys are definitely really hot... lol everyone at school knows who I like... So now everyone's all "hey, ask jesse out already!" so im kindof mad at him for not asking me out.....:p

Dude, all you people talk about is drugs and sex... what about guys? Guys are definitely really hot... lol everyone at school knows who I like... So now everyone's all "hey, ask jesse out already!" so im kindof mad at him for not asking me out.....:p
And your subject is somehow different?:p

And your subject is somehow different?:p
What's that supposed to mean?:( Lol jk. you read my mind!:p

A combination of high fever, cold medication, and general irritability has rendered me unfit to comment on anything political. I start frothing at the mouth, and having delusions. Yes, that IS different than usual:). So, in the interest of not getting myself forum-banned, or saying something I'll regret, I figured we could just tell one another what has been happening in RL!

Please people....keep it non-political...please!

well i woke upp at 8:14am today, and promptly re-set my alarm for 8:25...

finally got off the couch (i sleep on my couch, don't ask) and made it into the shower.

Got out the door and into the car at 8:43am (we men are much quicker than you ladies at getting ready to take on the world...) and to work at 8:58am.

Since then I've been working or typing online or reading online or eating or drinking water or just sitting here like a bump on a log or taking smoke breaks.

So that's what i've been up to today.

I'm currently deliberating over where to stop for my nightly drive-through dinner.

I have to go pick the kids up in about 20 minutes. I dosed myself with Neo Citran again, and it affords me about an hour's worth of clear energy. I'm making them their supper now, because I won't be able to later on...and we're eating black bean soup, made with the black beans I brought back from a farm in Cuba...mmmm....I hope my appetite remains long enough for me to eat them. This stupid fever has me fasting.

well i woke upp at 8:14am today, and promptly re-set my alarm for 8:25...

finally got off the couch (i sleep on my couch, don't ask) and made it into the shower.


Don't most guys? I mean, not because their wife sent them there...but I've never met a woman who could fall asleep on the couch, in front of the tv. Guys seems to need the background noise, and the remote clutched in their hand...

Don't most guys? I mean, not because their wife sent them there...but I've never met a woman who could fall asleep on the couch, in front of the tv. Guys seems to need the background noise, and the remote clutched in their hand...
Lol I think that's true... Good observation lol:p

Don't most guys? I mean, not because their wife sent them there...but I've never met a woman who could fall asleep on the couch, in front of the tv. Guys seems to need the background noise, and the remote clutched in their hand...

yeah, pretty much. I fall asleep watching soccer.

But so that i don't drop the remote while I sleep, I put it down on the table before nodding off.

Don't most guys? I mean, not because their wife sent them there...but I've never met a woman who could fall asleep on the couch, in front of the tv. Guys seems to need the background noise, and the remote clutched in their hand...The only person I know who does that on a regular basis is a girl...

what have i been up to?
well this evening i've been talking to glitziness and an old friend from school/uni online, had curry for tea, got through a rather unpleasant insecurity thing i was feeling down about, went to bed and felt like crap for a while because of it, and also did this (http://www.hlj.me.uk/map/DCS%20map%201a.jpg)for my region (first draft)
thats in no particular order btw...

more generally i've been up in scotland and edinburgh for the weekend (some pics of which can be seen here (http://www.hlj.me.uk/pics/Scotland/scotland.htm)), back on tuesday evening, and working on boring stuff since