NationStates Jolt Archive

I want to know since people at my school say either Brokback Mountain, or any cowboy movie. Which is the all time worst moive?

Armageddon (http://imdb.com/title/tt0120591/)

And all the kids at your school who said "any cowboy movie" need to be taken out back and shot.

And all the kids at your school who said "any cowboy movie" need to be taken out back and shot.
By cowboys?

Ghost, too much mushiness

By cowboys?
No, by the uncool kids who wear trenchcoats and listen to KMFDM.

It's reazorblade Smile: anybody who feels that this isn't the worst film ever made either hasn't seen it or (more likely if they're a critic) knows they won't get any review copies of Redemption releases if they diss the owner's girlfriend.

I have no problem with cowboy films. The western is a thing of beauty and wonder, and many of the best films ever made in America fit that category. Anybody who feels westerns are worthless should find out who John Ford was. Then they should watch a few of his films.

Coronado. It sucks so hard.:mad: :mad:

Ernest Saves Christmas
Ernest Goes to Jail
Ernest Scared Stupid
Ernest Goes to Camp
Home Alone 1, 2 and 3

Which is the all time worst moive?

The third Austin Powers. Mike Myers needs to stop making sequels. All I've ever seen from that guy is Wayne's World & Austin Powers movies.

Problem Child (1, 2, and 3)

Mars ATTACK. It is so stupid but really funny

Manos the Hands of Fate. It so bad that even MST3K commentary can't help it, now that's a bad movie.

I want to know since people at my school say either Brokback Mountain, or any cowboy movie. Which is the all time worst moive?
Spy Kids 3-D, without a doubt.

Showgirls.

Mars ATTACK. It is so stupid but really funny
I like the scene weith the monument and the scouts, beyond that it's a waste of time. (And they pinched the business with the country music from attack of the killer tomatos as well.)

Guilty By Association. I got it out once because it had Morgan Freeman, and I thought "oh, I like Morgan Freeman, if he's in it, it has to be ok". Maybe not. It was even worse than Gigli.

How can you like a mars ATTACK? I hate space movies, they are sooo stupid. Oh, wait, never mind, these are the worst movies. If this was a challenge, you win.

Napoleon Dynamite, hands down, worst movie ever that has been highly over rated, and over quoted

i did not think it was funny, i thought it was terrible

Many crappy movies have one thing in common. Jerry Bruckheimer produced them.

If I were in a room with Jerry Bruckheimer and Osama bin Laden and had only one bullet left in my gun I'd have trouble choosing which one to shoot.

Muholland drive is what you get when you take a perfectly good movie, and then cook the last two reels in a stove for a week. What a train wreck.

Many crappy movies have one thing in common. Jerry Bruckheimer produced them.

If I were in a room with Jerry Bruckheimer and Osama bin Laden and had only one bullet left in my gun I'd have trouble choosing which one to shoot.
Why would it be an issue? You could beat the other one to death with the empty gun.

random Cult: space movies are not stupid. If you watch a few by people other than Tim Burton and George Lucas, you may find one that you like.

Muholland drive is what you get when you take a perfectly good movie, and then cook the last two reels in a stove for a week. What a train wreck.
I couldn't decide if it was really bad or if I just don't get David Lynch movies. On the positive side, it had two lesbian scenes with Naomi Watts and Laura Harring.

Ok you have a point. Star Wars is not an official space movie, but it is darn close. I prefer ones more to this world though.

Why would it be an issue? You could beat the other one to death with the empty gun.

random Cult: space movies are not stupid. If you watch a few by people other than Tim Burton and George Lucas, you may find one that you like.
Good thinking. In that case Osama gets the quick death by shooting to the head and Bruckheimer gets beaten to death over the course of ninety minutes so that he can experience what people who watch his movies experience.

I want to know since people at my school say either Brokback Mountain, or any cowboy movie. Which is the all time worst moive?

You go to a religious school dont you?

Brokeback Mountain is one of the best movies I've seen in years. It haunts you for days afterwards.

The crappiest movie ever made was Thinner

Alexander was pretty bad. It looked like an episode of Xena, but with bigger stars.

Underworld also sucked arse. There was no dialogue for the first 20mins... I think I fell asleep!

You go to a religious school dont you?

Brokeback Mountain is one of the best movies I've seen in years. It haunts you for days afterwards.

The crappiest movie ever made was Thinner

Religous school?!?! My teacher adn half my class are frikin atheists! Besides, who the hell would like a movie with a bunch of gay cowboys running around slapping each other?!?! WHO????

You go to a religious school dont you?

Brokeback Mountain is one of the best movies I've seen in years. It haunts you for days afterwards.

The crappiest movie ever made was Thinner
The Stephen King novel that was so crappy he wouldn't own up to having written it? I didn't know they'd filmed that one.

I couldn't decide if it was really bad or if I just don't get David Lynch movies. On the positive side, it had two lesbian scenes with Naomi Watts and Laura Harring.

Yeah. ;) I consider both of them part of the cooked part though. Maybe David Lynch can blame God.

I guess I have a double whammie: I love good film noir (LA Confidential, Chinatown), didn't know what a David Lynch movie was before I watched it.

Religous school?!?! My teacher adn half my class are frikin atheists! Besides, who the hell would like a movie with a bunch of gay cowboys running around slapping each other?!?! WHO????
Fass?

Religous school?!?! My teacher adn half my class are frikin atheists! Besides, who the hell would like a movie with a bunch of gay cowboys running around slapping each other?!?! WHO????

So I take it you haven't sen it then? If you read the reviews of the movies you'll see exactly who liked that movie (out of 3600 yahoo movie reviews, less than 1% gave it anythign less than A+'s and it was always some religious freak claiming it was trying to turn everyone gay). I assume you must have somethign against gays because its a great sotry with marvelous acting as well as gorgeous scenery.

Religous school?!?! My teacher adn half my class are frikin atheists! Besides, who the hell would like a movie with a bunch of gay cowboys running around slapping each other?!?! WHO????

This post only merits one response:


Grow the fuck up. :rolleyes:

The Stephen King novel that was so crappy he wouldn't own up to having written it? I didn't know they'd filmed that one.

I wish they hadn't

Then there are movies so bad you have to see them like Plan 9 From Outer Space

Religous school?!?! My teacher adn half my class are frikin atheists! Besides, who the hell would like a movie with a bunch of gay cowboys running around slapping each other?!?! WHO????
Alexander Jodorowski?

Preebs, I got that from watching Donnie Darko on DVD: there's all these scenes with no dialogue which I jusdt fast forwarded through. Then I get peopole bending my ear about missing the good stuff:
"It has Killing Moon in it! Echo and the Bunnymen! Good shit!"
"Does it?"
"Yes, right at the start, where he's on his bike on the hill."
"Ah, nobody was saying owt, so I went through that bit on fast wind."
"Philistine!"

Fuck you!!! I hate gay perverts! Who the hell would stick their penus up someone's ass??? Natural hormones make humans have sex with people of the OTHER gender!!! Not people of their own!!!

Alexander Jodorowski?

Preebs, I got that from watching Donnie Darko on DVD: there's all these scenes with no dialogue which I jusdt fast forwarded through. Then I get peopole bending my ear about missing the good stuff:
"It has Killing Moon in it! Echo and the Bunnymen! Good shit!"
"Does it?"
"Yes, right at the start, where he's on his bike on the hill."
"Ah, nobody was saying owt, so I went through that bit on fast wind."
"Philistine!"


I loved Donnie Darko

any movie made or going to be made by Uwe Boll needs to be mentioned

Alexander Jodorowski?

Preebs, I got that from watching Donnie Darko on DVD: there's all these scenes with no dialogue which I jusdt fast forwarded through. Then I get peopole bending my ear about missing the good stuff:
"It has Killing Moon in it! Echo and the Bunnymen! Good shit!"
"Does it?"
"Yes, right at the start, where he's on his bike on the hill."
"Ah, nobody was saying owt, so I went through that bit on fast wind."
"Philistine!"
Haha. I LOVED Donnie Darko. The thing with Underworld was that it was just people/werewolves slaughtering one another, with no dialogue and no explanation.

At least in Donnie Darko you can follow what's happening.

And will someone volunteer to chase the troll back under its bridge?

Fuck you!!! I hate gay perverts! Who the hell would stick their penus up someone's ass??? Natural hormones make humans have sex with people of the OTHER gender!!! Not people of their own!!!
Meh, some people like brussel sprouts. Some don't. Some like man-ass. Some don't. It's nobody's business but their own.

any movie made or going to be made by Uwe Boll needs to be mentioned

I think mentioning his name in regards to movies is tanamount to godwining any other discussion.

Fuck you!!! I hate gay perverts! Who the hell would stick their penus up someone's ass??? Natural hormones make humans have sex with people of the OTHER gender!!! Not people of their own!!!

*feeds the troll*

natural animals with natural hormones have long had homosexual sex.

Haha. I LOVED Donnie Darko. The thing with Underworld was that it was just people/werewolves slaughtering one another, with no dialogue and no explanation.

At least in Donnie Darko you can follow what's happening.

And will someone volunteer to chase the troll back under its bridge?
Donnie Darko kicked ass. The troll is just an ignorant kid. He'll probably grow out of it. Or maybe he's just repressing and he'll come out of the closet eventually.

Meh, some people like brussel sprouts. Some don't. Some like man-ass. Some don't. It's nobody's business but their own.
Fine, they can like what they want, but bringing that around to people, and making it a HUGE-ASS controversary is pathetic. If they want to be gay then they can be gay in their own frikin house.

Meh, some people like brussel sprouts. Some don't. Some like man-ass. Some don't. It's nobody's business but their own.

Me, I like man-ass a lot more than brussels sprouts... But what about men who stick their "penuses" in women's arses? :p Are they sickos too?

http://www.nationstates.net/images/flags/uploads/g_d.jpg

I PROCLAIM BATTLEFIELD EARTH TO BE THE WORST MOVIE EVER. ONLY ADDING TOM CRUISE WOULD HAVE MADE IT WORSE. FORTUNATELY I HAD MICHAEL ARCHANGEL INTERCEPT HIS CASTING CALL.

The crappiest movie in the history of filmmaking is "The Keep"

Never, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, see it. I'm amazed that I was able to retain my eyesight after watching half of it.

Fine, they can like what they want, but bringing that around to people, and making it a HUGE-ASS controversary is pathetic. If they want to be gay then they can be gay in their own frikin house.
It's only a HUGE-ASS controversy because people like you have a fit about it. If you don't want to see it nobody's forcing you to watch.

Resident Evil

Resident Evil: Apocalypse

Anything by Uwe Boll

Gigli

Men In Black 2

Showgirls

The list goes on and on, but those are the top 6 in order.

Fine, they can like what they want, but bringing that around to people, and making it a HUGE-ASS controversary is pathetic. If they want to be gay then they can be gay in their own frikin house.

The militant gay agenda shall now set it's sights on you!

Haha. I LOVED Donnie Darko. The thing with Underworld was that it was just people/werewolves slaughtering one another, with no dialogue and no explanation.

At least in Donnie Darko you can follow what's happening.

And will someone volunteer to chase the troll back under its bridge?
It was okay, but the fact that he was squashed flat by a jet engine at the climax was a bit of a loose end, I thought.
(To be honest, it pisses me off no end when people talk about this that or t'other song on a film soundtrack being proof that it's a thing of awe and wonder.)

Me, I like man-ass a lot more than brussels sprouts... But what about men who stick their "penuses" in women's arses? :p Are they sickos too?
They are NOT "sickos" sinnce that is natural, and is how reproduction happens, not through the person's ass! If people stoped doing that then the entire human population would die since there are no children for the future!!!

http://www.nationstates.net/images/flags/uploads/g_d.jpg

I PROCLAIM BATTLEFIELD EARTH TO BE THE WORST MOVIE EVER. ONLY ADDING TOM CRUISE WOULD HAVE MADE IT WORSE. FORTUNATELY I HAD MICHAEL ARCHANGEL INTERCEPT HIS CASTING CALL.
Where's the sandwich and cold beer I asked for this morning?

They are NOT "sickos" sinnce that is natural, and is how reproduction happens, not through the person's ass! If people stoped doing that then the entire human population would die since there are no children for the future!!!
Yeah. This planet's down to it's last 6 billion people.

http://www.nationstates.net/images/flags/uploads/g_d.jpg

I PROCLAIM BATTLEFIELD EARTH TO BE THE WORST MOVIE EVER. ONLY ADDING TOM CRUISE WOULD HAVE MADE IT WORSE. FORTUNATELY I HAD MICHAEL ARCHANGEL INTERCEPT HIS CASTING CALL.

Well, I can't really argue with the Creator of the Universe.

Resident Evil

Resident Evil: Apocalypse

Anything by Uwe Boll

Gigli

Men In Black 2

Showgirls

The list goes on and on, but those are the top 6 in order.
No they are not: you have not mentioned Razor Blade Smile.

Gay people do just that, act gay in their own homes. They are completely normal people that like men. All the freaks you see on TV that are "gay" are cashing in on being gay becoming fashionable and the cool thing to do, whether they are or are not gay. Most of them pretend to do it.

Species 2

Boys Dont Cry (sorry people it sucked)

War of the Worlds (spielberg one of course)

Catwoman

anything with sandra bullock

It was okay, but the fact that he was squashed flat by a jet engine at the climax was a bit of a loose end, I thought.
(To be honest, it pisses me off no end when people talk about this that or t'other song on a film soundtrack being proof that it's a thing of awe and wonder.)
I figured it out to my satisfaction, and it only took three viewings... :p

They are NOT "sickos" sinnce that is natural, and is how reproduction happens, not through the person's ass! If people stoped doing that then the entire human population would die since there are no children for the future!!!

I think you have an unhealthy fixation on homosexuals as well as their peni and ani

Gay people do just that, act gay in their own homes. They are completely normal people that like men. All the freaks you see on TV that are "gay" are cashing in on being gay becoming fashionable and the cool thing to do, whether they are or are not gay. Most of them pretend to do it.
Your right, they are gay in their own homes, but when they are walking down the streets holding hands, or making out in a movie theater it becomes perverted. That is when people hate them.

anything with sandra bullock
Got to disagree there. Though she sucked in it, she was in "A Time to Kill", which was decent. Not great, but good.

I couldn't stand Soylent Green.

I had to watch it in school, and it was horrible.
The only good thing about the movie was the line where we find out what Soylent Green is.
That's all I remember from it.

Where's the sandwich and cold beer I asked for this morning?
http://www.nationstates.net/images/flags/uploads/g_d.jpg

DOWN AT THE PUB WHERE I PUT SUCH THINGS. I DON'T DO DELIVERIES. ASK MARY & JOE... MARY HAD TO THE DELIVERY HERSELF.

Your right, they are gay in their own homes, but when they are walking down the streets holding hands, or making out in a movie theater it becomes perverted. That is when people hate them.

No, that's only when you hate them. Real people don't care.

Your right, they are gay in their own homes, but when they are walking down the streets holding hands, or making out in a movie theater it becomes perverted. That is when people hate them.
Dude, seeing a couple of guys holding hands isn't going to make you gay, so why do you care?

http://i1.tinypic.com/oarz3q.jpg

i thought people on earth spelt crappiest with two p's?

and it's a toss up between "road trip" or "Jackass: the movie". Given the former at least attempts the faint vestige of a plot, i'd say the latter.

Your right, they are gay in their own homes, but when they are walking down the streets holding hands, or making out in a movie theater it becomes perverted. That is when people hate them.
Replace gay with straight in that sentence and see what a hypocrite you, and people like you (because even if you are a fake, there really are people like that...) are.

http://www.nationstates.net/images/flags/uploads/g_d.jpg

DOWN AT THE PUB WHERE I PUT SUCH THINGS. I DON'T DO DELIVERIES. ASK MARY & JOE... MARY HAD TO THE DELIVERY HERSELF.
No-good lousy, lazy deity.

No, that's only when you hate them. Real people don't care.
How only me? The president of America hates them, most of Texas hates them and other redneck states.

I think you have an unhealthy fixation on homosexuals as well as their peni and ani

For some reason I'm reminded of Mallrats and the Stan Lee giving Brodie advice scene here. Is something wrong with me?

No, that's only when you hate them. Real people don't care.


It's okay sumamba some people are just retarted, and we have to let them get eaten by the wolves to make this world a better place. Just ingore them.

I couldn't stand Soylent Green.

I had to watch it in school, and it was horrible.
The only good thing about the movie was the line where we find out what Soylent Green is.
That's all I remember from it.
They murdered the book for that: it was heavily anti catholic rant about birth control, but the studio decided that they should suck the Pope's cock and invented this shit about cannibalism instead.

Dude, seeing a couple of guys holding hands isn't going to make you gay, so why do you care?

http://i1.tinypic.com/oarz3q.jpg

I don't know, I'm feeling tingly in my special place looking at that.

The Brown Bunny, of course, after that, Waterworld

Replace gay with straight in that sentence and see what a hypocrite you, and people like you (because even if you are a fake, there really are people like that...) are.
Whatever, If it is sooo "new age" to be gay, then ill just let it go by, but i personaly hate them.

How only me? The president of America hates them, most of Texas hates them and other redneck states.
The president of America is a hypocrite. He holds hands with swarthy bearded men all the time. See the picture I posted. Texas is one of the more backward parts of the planet, like Alabama and Pakistan. Redneck states dont' matter. Remember who won last time the rednecks decided to get all upity?

I figured it out to my satisfaction, and it only took three viewings... :p
Is he not supposed to have stopped the end of the world, then? Is Frank just mucking him about to take the piss?

The president of America is a hypocrite. He holds hands with swarthy bearded men all the time. See the picture I posted. Texas is one of the more backward parts of the planet, like Alabama and Pakistan. Redneck states dont' matter. Remember who won last time the rednecks decided to get all upity?

Everybody is a fuckin hypocryte, fine i admit the gay is fine now, but there is a health issue here. AIDS!!! If you can find a way to keep gays from kissing in large public areas, and AIDS being transfered then im fine

Is he not supposed to have stopped the end of the world, then? Is Frank just mucking him about to take the piss?
He stopped the end of the world for the people he cared about. His little section of the universe had split off into a "tangent universe", which would collapse if he didn't sacrifice himself.

hmmm a movie thread turns to an anti gay flame war. I shall be leaving this thread now.

No-good lousy, lazy deity.
http://www.nationstates.net/images/flags/uploads/g_d.jpg

CREATING IS HARD WORK... THAT AND PUTTING UP WITH ENDLESS PETTITIONS TO SMITE.

IT'S LIKE TELEPHONE SOLICITORS 24-7. I DON'T EVEN GET A CHANCE TO WORK OUT WHAT WENT WRONG ON THE PLATYPUS, MUCH LESS RELIGION.

CUT ME SOME SLACK OR I MIGHT BE ABLE TO FIT IN AN EXTRA SMITING.

They murdered the book for that: it was heavily anti catholic rant about birth control, but the studio decided that they should suck the Pope's cock and invented this shit about cannibalism instead.

I didn't know there was a book.

Maybe if I ever see it, I'll read it, and I won't hate it as much.
Well, my hate for the movie wouldn't waver, but if I enjoyed the book I wouldn't shudder in disgust everytime I hear the title.

Which isn't that often, but whatever.

Everybody is a fuckin hypocryte, fine i admit the gay is fine now, but there is a health issue here. AIDS!!! If you can find a way to keep gays from kissing in large public areas, and AIDS being transfered then im fine
You know, straight people get AIDS too. I'm sure Africa isn't a big gay disco and crystal meth party.

How only me? The president of America hates them, most of Texas hates them and other redneck states.


That's why I said real people don't care. :p

For some reason I'm reminded of Mallrats and the Stan Lee giving Brodie advice scene here. Is something wrong with me?

yes

http://www.nationstates.net/images/flags/uploads/g_d.jpg

CREATING IS HARD WORK... THAT AND PUTTING UP WITH ENDLESS PETTITIONS TO SMITE.

IT'S LIKE TELEPHONE SOLICITORS 24-7. I DON'T EVEN GET A CHANCE TO WORK OUT WHAT WENT WRONG ON THE PLATYPUS, MUCH LESS RELIGION.

CUT ME SOME SLACK OR I MIGHT BE ABLE TO FIT IN AN EXTRA SMITING.
NOTHING WENT WRONG ON THE PLATYPUS!!!!!!!

It's the perfect creature. It gets 8 hours of REM sleep every night. More than any other living thing on earth.

Of the movies listed here so far, many I haven't even seen due to how much my friends declared their suckitude (Battlefield Earth). Some I know are bad but I love because of the badness (Plan 9, Manos). I will watch a bad movie now and then, myself. The worst I own, however, is flat out, hands down, Dungeons and Dragons. Jeremy Irons must have lost a bet. I only keep my VHS copy around because I like to have movies with fantasy/sci-fi props and costumes playing when I'm concocting D&D games or sketching or painting my Warhammer figures.

You know, straight people get AIDS too. I'm sure Africa isn't a big gay disco and crystal meth party.
Yah, they have AIDS. Not through gays, but through prostitutes.

It's okay sumamba some people are just retarted, and we have to let them get eaten by the wolves to make this world a better place. Just ingore them.


Oh I know.. .I'm just having fun. It's kinda fun... like when yo are playign catch with yoru dog and pretend to throw the ball so you can get a chuckle.

Worst movie I have ever seen would have to be "Bloodfight".
http://imdb.com/title/tt0140859/
The worst popular movie I have seen is "Gladiator".

Fine, they can like what they want, but bringing that around to people, and making it a HUGE-ASS controversary is pathetic. If they want to be gay then they can be gay in their own frikin house.

Well then shouldn't straight people have to confine their sexuality to their homes as well. If a straight couple is allowed to be affectionate in public, so should a gay couple. If a straight couple can get an official recognition that they are a couple (I'm refering to a marriage contract of course), then why can't a gay couple? Homosexuality is not unnatural, it occurs with great frequency, and there's nothing gays can do to change themselves.

Aside from that, the few gay people I actually know are actually more reserved with their sexuality than many of my straight friends.

Anyway, getting back to the topic of bad movies, has no one seriously mentioned Battlefield Earth yet? Come on, it was terrible. Maybe it's too old for people like Random Cult, you know waaaay back in 2000. (Sorry, that was a really very nessisary dig.)

Crappiest movie ever:

The Passion of the Christ.

Brown Bunny..........j/k

Lost in Translation was pretty bad. ;)

oh and also

Jeepers Creepers, started out okay, then about 3 seconds in.....really bad.

yes

But he's Mr. Fantastic I mean if he's stretchable in one place.....

Manos the Hands of Fate. It so bad that even MST3K commentary can't help it, now that's a bad movie.

Seconded. Just try watching it without Joel and the 'bots.

Munchies comes in at a pretty close second.

Fine, topics over, lets get back to the REAL topic here, cuz half of us have already. Whoever said Passion of the Christ is right, I dont think anybody can say something good about that, if they can tell me plz.

Wow...there were only 4 pages when I started writing that last post :(

Also wanted to mention Suicide Circle, Tomb of the Werewolf, Vampires vs. Zombies, Wolves of Wallstreet, and Starship Troopers 2.

I have friends who make watching terrible movies a hobby.

Seconded. Just try watching it without Joel and the 'bots.

Munchies comes in at a pretty close second.


Munchies!

oh god i thought i was the only one who saw that crap.

other shit films were Puppet Master 4-?
any halloween movie after part 2

But he's Mr. Fantastic I mean if he's stretchable in one place.....


That was a very important insight I will admit.

100th post

Crap some1 beat me to it

Fine, topics over, lets get back to the REAL topic here, cuz half of us have already. Whoever said Passion of the Christ is right, I dont think anybody can say something good about that, if they can tell me plz.

That may be the first intelligent thing you have said thus far. Of course you said it in a profoundly stupid way.

That may be the first intelligent thing you have said thus far. Of course you said it in a profoundly stupid way.
How was it stupid?

Gotta agree with 'Alexander'

Crappiest movie ever:

The Passion of the Christ.
I prefer the Benny Hill version.

Being I liked Starship Troopers (dodges flaming responses)
I would have to say that Starship Troopers 2 was the worst movie I ever saw.
Constant Gardener wins the award of most confusing movie I ever saw. Besides it had more liberal undertones than a Michael Moore movie.

Being I liked Starship Troopers (dodges flaming responses)
I would have to say that Starship Troopers 2 was the worst movie I ever saw.
Constant Gardener wins the award of most confusing movie I ever saw. Besides it had more liberal undertones than a Michael Moore movie.


I enjoyed starship troopers as well wont receive any flaming from me. Paul Verhoeven needs more work.

I enjoyed starship troopers as well wont receive any flaming from me. Paul Verhoeven needs more work.

How can anyone not like Starship Troopers? A state of the art slick, violent movie that satirizes both Hollywood romanticism of the military and American gung ho patriotism.

WITH BIG BUGS AND DOOGIE HOWSER.

It's a winning formula.

Whatever, If it is sooo "new age" to be gay, then ill just let it go by, but i personaly hate them.
Bigot.

Anyway, to the serious issue...
Brokeback mountain is a great movie - it has crawled its way into my top 100 at least. 9/10 in my opinion.

Now, a selection of my worst movies:
*'Manos' the Hands of Fate (Just... terrible, even the MST3K-version)
* Above the Law (So bad it makes me sick...)
* Batman & Robin (What the Hell? Worst... Batman... EVER!)
* Freddy Got Fingered (Physically painful "comedy", the only movie it really HURTS to watch)
* Hellbound (Must be the worst movie Chuck Norris has ever been in) but don't tell him I said so :eek:
* The Matrix Revolutions (What happened? How can it blow soooo much?)
* The Patriot (Oh deary, deary me... And this was before Mel Gibson thought he was God)
* Speed 2: Cruise Control (Speed without any speed at all! Most boring action ever!)
* Street Fighter (I rest my case)
* Turbulence (Just say no!)

How can anyone not like Starship Troopers? A state of the art slick, violent movie that satirizes both Hollywood romanticism of the military and American gung ho patriotism.

WITH BIG BUGS AND DOOGIE HOWSER.

It's a winning formula.


one of the greatest movies i thought would suck, and i saw it in the theaters

there was one street fighter that was good though

Street Fighter with Sonny Chiba is classic.

I enjoyed starship troopers as well wont receive any flaming from me. Paul Verhoeven needs more work.
He does? I thought he'd have been pretty well set up with that one, the flick with Sharon Stone's snatch, and Robocop.

one of the greatest movies i thought would suck, and i saw it in the theaters

I'm glad I;m not alone in my pro-Starship troopers-ness. It should also be noted that the soundtrack is awesome. Poledouris rocked it HARD.

How can anyone not like Starship Troopers? A state of the art slick, violent movie that satirizes both Hollywood romanticism of the military and American gung ho patriotism.

WITH BIG BUGS AND DOOGIE HOWSER.

It's a winning formula.

Starship Troopers is admittedly admirable when viewed in this context. It was however, not designed as a work of satire.

Starship Troopers is admittedly admirable when viewed in this context. It was however, not designed as a work of satire.

The film was indeed intended as a work of satire, i read many interviews with Mr Verhoeven at the time. The book, dunno, never read it.

However - whatever anyone says - Showgirls wasn't meant ironically. It was exploitative tat with jiggling hooters. And not even particularly arousing jiggling hooters at that.

Reefer Madness and Marijuiana - The Devil's Weed come to mind as some of the crappiest movies ever since they were meant to be taken seriously. Also, Plan 9 from Outer Space ranks at the top of all time horrible as well. Gigli should also get a nod here.

Friday After Next
Around 50-98% of American films made past 1970.

there was one street fighter that was good though

Street Fighter with Sonny Chiba is classic.

Just to clarify my post:
I meant this (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0111301/) Street fighter, with Mr. Van Damme.

Just to clarify my post:
I meant this (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0111301/) Street fighter, with Mr. Van Damme.
Trust me (on this if on nothing else) that Sonny Chiba flick is well worth a look.

Has anyone said Starcrash yet? It's actually a tradition to watch that movie at the "summer camp for nerds" I go to and laugh at all the plot holes.

Friday After Next
Around 50-98% of American films made past 1970.
yay for classics like The Maltese Falcon

On the subject of so bad it's hilarious Riki-Oh: The Story of Ricky takes the cake. I defy you to watch that movie and not laugh.

http://www.i-mockery.com/minimocks/storyofricky/default.php

Top Gun.

Great for anyone with a mental age below 13 though.

Many crappy movies have one thing in common. Jerry Bruckheimer produced them.

If I were in a room with Jerry Bruckheimer and Osama bin Laden and had only one bullet left in my gun I'd have trouble choosing which one to shoot.

Oddly enough I was going to name "Con Air" as the worst movie and lo and behold...its a "Jerry".

Bruckheimer was born in 1945, Osama in 57, plus Osama is a big lad (between 6'4 and 6 6 according to his most wanted. The logical choice is therefore shoot Osama, and give jerry the butt of the gun. And of course, theres that satisfying feeling.....

Pearl Harbor was a much worse Bruckheimer film than con air. But don't get me wrong im not defending con air whatsosver.

Men in Black II, the Mummy Returns, The Musketeer, Alien versus Predator, Alexander (the new one), Troy, the Passion of the Christ, and so many more should never have been made. There are probably a bunch of others but thankfully I’ve erased them from my memory to save me from nausea. I’m just glad to have escaped so many bad chick fliks to round out my generally horrible movie experiences.

Those are only the worst I’ve seen. There were a lot of movies (Triple X, Doom, and Underworld for instance) that I didn’t even sniff at and even in situations where I could watch them for free, haven’t. You can never get those two hours back, they’re not as free as you think.

any movie with Paul Walker should be on this list as well. Paul Walker and Chris Klein are the 2 worst modern day actors out there now

Yeah, thanks for that I'd completely blanked Pearl Harbour from my memory as one of the worst war movies ever made. Except for Nicholas Cage badly overplaying a marine in Windtalker or whatever that film was. That was damn horrid!

It's reazorblade Smile: anybody who feels that this isn't the worst film ever made either hasn't seen it or (more likely if they're a critic) knows they won't get any review copies of Redemption releases if they diss the owner's girlfriend.

I have no problem with cowboy films. The western is a thing of beauty and wonder, and many of the best films ever made in America fit that category. Anybody who feels westerns are worthless should find out who John Ford was. Then they should watch a few of his films.

I'm not a critic, and I liked Razorblade Smile (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0159693/). Vampire woman with a sword and a weird plot, even with bad acting, is always fun.

Most original films on Sci-Fi channel, like Dracula 3000 (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0367677/). Despite having an actress I consider hot, Erika Eleniak, the movie was awful. Made in South Africa, we are supposed to believe that in one thousand years, black guys who crew a starship are still talking like they stepped out of a ghetto or just made a rap album? :eek: Dracula? Special Effects? Hah! And in the future, they still have manual wheelchairs? And the ending!!! If you ever get a chance to see it for free, only watch the last five minutes. You will know all you need to know.:gundge:

Yeah, thanks for that I'd completely blanked Pearl Harbour from my memory as one of the worst war movies ever made. Except for Nicholas Cage badly overplaying a marine in Windtalker or whatever that film was. That was damn horrid!

i never saw windtalkers, never will now though.

Pearl Harbor was a much worse Bruckheimer film than con air. But don't get me wrong im not defending con air whatsosver.

This may be true, but they didnt get me with Pearl Harbour.....I read the reviews...I even dodged it on TV...but Con Air I hired on video..because I thought I was smart and that "violent convicts" and a decent cast meant a violent movie I could watch for a while to relax..that money could have gone on drink, or been donated to charity...or lost down a drain to posterity.

This may be true, but they didnt get me with Pearl Harbour.....I read the reviews...I even dodged it on TV...but Con Air I hired on video..because I thought I was smart and that "violent convicts" and a decent cast meant a violent movie I could watch for a while to relax..that money could have gone on drink, or been donated to charity...or lost down a drain to posterity.


I sadly saw both con-air and pearl harbor in the theaters but gladly didnt have to pay for either one.

I'm not a critic, and I liked Razorblade Smile (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0159693/). Vampire woman with a sword and a weird plot, even with bad acting, is always fun.

Most original films on Sci-Fi channel, like Dracula 3000 (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0367677/). Despite having an actress I consider hot, Erika Eleniak, the movie was awful. Made in South Africa, we are supposed to believe that in one thousand years, black guys who crew a starship are still talking like they stepped out of a ghetto or just made a rap album? :eek: Dracula? Special Effects? Hah! And in the future, they still have manual wheelchairs? And the ending!!! If you ever get a chance to see it for free, only watch the last five minutes. You will know all you need to know.:gundge:
I was just puzzled that (after a century or so of killing people for big money) she was still living in a semi in east London. That and the fact that she was wearing a rubber catsuit, a pair of Betty Page's old boots and a fur coat to sneak up on people she wanted to kill: it's impossible to move quietly while wearing rubber...

The porno I made with yo mama

I think it unfair, by the way, to lump in crap made for nothing, with crap made for multi-millions. They might both be crap, but one has something resembling an excuse.

Men in Black II, the Mummy Returns, The Musketeer, Alien versus Predator, Alexander (the new one), Troy, the Passion of the Christ, and so many more should never have been made. There are probably a bunch of others but thankfully I’ve erased them from my memory to save me from nausea. I’m just glad to have escaped so many bad chick fliks to round out my generally horrible movie experiences.

Those are only the worst I’ve seen. There were a lot of movies (Triple X, Doom, and Underworld for instance) that I didn’t even sniff at and even in situations where I could watch them for free, haven’t. You can never get those two hours back, they’re not as free as you think.
WHAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! xXx rules!! What the hell r u saying? Underworld wasn't that bad either. The two worst movies are: Brokeback Mountain (the concept) and Stepmom (because it was crap).

n.b. expects reply to such controversial statement.....promptly

Who felt that "Dude, Where's My Car?" was a good film?

WHAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! xXx rules!! What the hell r u saying? Underworld wasn't that bad either. The two worst movies are: Brokeback Mountain (the concept) and Stepmom (because it was crap).

n.b. expects reply to such controversial statement.....promptly
You got your reply: XXX is an abomination in the eyes of the lord. The only reason that there hasn't been a pogrom against Vin Diesel is because Pat Robertson hasn't seen it.

Trust me (on this if on nothing else) that Sonny Chiba flick is well worth a look.
I'll check it out if I happen to come across it, then! ;) And scream Bloody Murder if I don't like it... :p

Pearl Harbor was a much worse Bruckheimer film than con air.
Pearl Harbor wasn't that bad *dodges a thrown shoe*
but that's only if you see it the right way. Put the DVD into your gigantic home-entertainment system, jump to the chapter where the actual attack on Pearl Harbor begins (Warning: Do NOT watch any part of the movie before the Zero's are approaching their targets - do NOT under any circumstances listen to any dialogue before this point!). Then watch the attack, and when it's over - and by this I mean the very moment the attack is over - stop watching. See? Not a horrible film, you've been entertained for about 30 minutes.

Watching only the attack on Pearl Harbor: 6,5/10
Watching the entire film: 2/10

brokeback mountain is only bad for the terrible pun in the title. though when mr ledger and mr gylllinhalllll first go at it im sure some backs were broken.

oh and the fact gyllhllll tries to make hetrosexual amends by doin a war film, and making that camp as well.

good films though

I was just puzzled that (after a century or so of killing people for big money) she was still living in a semi in east London. That and the fact that she was wearing a rubber catsuit, a pair of Betty Page's old boots and a fur coat to sneak up on people she wanted to kill: it's impossible to move quietly while wearing rubber...

Well, she was just out for some fun!:D

I think everything she did was for fun. The flat, the rubber suit, the noisy sneaking...

It was hi-larious!;)

brokeback mountain is only bad for the terrible pun in the title. though when mr ledger and mr gylllinhalllll first go at it im sure some backs were broken.

oh and the fact gyllhllll tries to make hetrosexual amends by doin a war film, and making that camp as well.

good films though

"Chariots of Fire"---The worst picture ever to get "Best Picture"

sorry bout double resonse .... my laptop could get a part in brokeback mountain ........ the guy who started the thread will like my attempt at un pc joke, then again maybe not

You got your reply: XXX is an abomination in the eyes of the lord. The only reason that there hasn't been a pogrom against Vin Diesel is because Pat Robertson hasn't seen it.
How is it an abomination? It has snowboarding, explosions, hot chicks and stupid (in a good way) dialogue! It's great in that it emphises one of life's great truths: Johhny Foreigner is really out to get you!

Men in Black II, the Mummy Returns, The Musketeer, Alien versus Predator, Alexander (the new one), Troy, the Passion of the Christ, and so many more should never have been made. There are probably a bunch of others but thankfully I’ve erased them from my memory to save me from nausea. I’m just glad to have escaped so many bad chick fliks to round out my generally horrible movie experiences.

Those are only the worst I’ve seen. There were a lot of movies (Triple X, Doom, and Underworld for instance) that I didn’t even sniff at and even in situations where I could watch them for free, haven’t. You can never get those two hours back, they’re not as free as you think.
Why does everyone hat the Mummy Returns? I liked it.

Why does everyone hat the Mummy Returns? I liked it.
Burn in hell!!!!! The Mummy Returns was shit.......except for the baloon guy, he was cool.

I've said this many times, and I will say it once more: It's Pat.

How is it an abomination? It has snowboarding, explosions, hot chicks and stupid (in a good way) dialogue! It's great in that it emphises one of life's great truths: Johhny Foreigner is really out to get you!
Dario Argento's kid is not a hot chick. Sorry.

Well, she was just out for some fun!

I think everything she did was for fun. The flat, the rubber suit, the noisy sneaking...

It was hi-larious!
It may be funny, but it isn't any good, and I'm told that the east end isn't very fun at all.

Why does everyone hat the Mummy Returns? I liked it.
I've got to admit, I liked the mummy and the mummy returns.

Dario Argento's kid is not a hot chick. Sorry.


It may be funny, but it isn't any good, and I'm told that the east end isn't very fun at all.
I don't need your fancy schmancy names! There were definitely hot chicks in that film......though not necessarily in important roles.

"Chariots of Fire"---The worst picture ever to get "Best Picture"

If you think "Chariots of Fire" was the worst film ever made, then you have no beauty in your soul. FACT.

Who felt that "Dude, Where's My Car?" was a good film?

If you think "Chariots of Fire" was the worst film ever made, then you have no beauty in your soul. FACT.
Even if that was true.....you have no beauty in your face.....so there!

I don't need your fancy schmancy names! There were definitely hot chicks in that film......though not necessarily in important roles.
Fair enough: I thought you were on about the sort with the tattoos he was swithing.

Gymkata (http://www.i-mockery.com/minimocks/gymkata/default.php)

I kid you not.

Even if that was true.....you have no beauty in your face.....so there!

i have fantastic cheek bones so nerr.

Gymkata (http://www.i-mockery.com/minimocks/gymkata/default.php)

I kid you not.
I've seen that one: I know you'e not kidding.

Fair enough: I thought you were on about the sort with the tattoos he was swithing.
Define "swithing". I haven't come across that word yet

Even if that was true.....you have no beauty in your face.....so there!

and i'm sorry but it is true, "Chariots of Fire" was undoubtedly not as good as everyone thought at the time, but far shitter films have won Oscars, and anyone who has ever seen it and "Edge of Hell" knows how far removed it is from the worst film ever made.

and i'm sorry but it is true, "Chariots of Fire" was undoubtedly not as good as everyone thought at the time, but far shitter films have won Oscars, and anyone who has ever seen it and "Edge of Hell" knows how far removed it is from the worst film ever made.
Name one shitter film that won an oscar.

Define "swithing". I haven't come across that word yet
Rumpy pumpy: what you call "sex" in America.

Name one shitter film that won an oscar.
Titanic.

Also, since when have Oscars ever counted for anything? They gave an oscar to "Chicago" instead of "LOTR: The Two Towers" for fuck's sake!. They cannot be trusted with important film awarding desicions again. I say we let Matt Stone and Trey Parker choose. That way at least two of the greatest films of our time (South Park the Movie and Team America) would have got the recognition they deserve.

Rumpy pumpy: what you call "sex" in America.
Rumpy Pumpy I get. That's a proper expression. Linguistically any word that has appeared on Blackadder should be used as frequently as possible: Brokeback mountain = gobbledegook......Stepmom= wibble

Titanic.

He shoots, he fucking scores.

Titanic.
Point taken.......but....that film would have been better if the rich guy had got the girl and given Di Caprio his just desserts. Di Caprio getting beaten up......priceless.

Also, since when have Oscars ever counted for anything? They gave an oscar to "Chicago" instead of "LOTR: The Two Towers" for fuck's sake!. They cannot be trusted with important film awarding desicions again. I say we let Matt Stone and Trey Parker choose. That way at least two of the greatest films of our time (South Park the Movie and Team America) would have got the recognition they deserve.

The original poster i was responding to described it as the worst movie to win an Oscar, therefore i made reference to it.

PS:- South Park was vaguely amusing for about ten seconds. Team America was never amusing. Agreed with the LOTR vs Chicago thing though.

The original poster i was responding to described it as the worst movie to win an Oscar, therefore i made reference to it.

PS:- South Park was vaguely amusing for about ten seconds. Team America was never amusing. Agreed with the LOTR vs Chicago thing though.
How can you fail to like Team America! It made fun of koreans....and had explosions....and sex. That's the three ingredients of a great movie to start with....and then it made fun of Michael Moore (may he suffer in agony forever) as well as Matt Damon. What more can you want?
South park..... Satan + Saddamm Hussein.....the truth at last! Besides it also confirms what we know about canadians. "Their beady little eyes, their flapping heads so full of lies..."

Brokeback Mountain or Top Gun. Which of these gay-related movies is worse?

Burn in hell!!!!! The Mummy Returns was shit.......except for the baloon guy, he was cool.
First time I was told to burn in hell for liking a movie...

How can you fail to like Team America! It made fun of koreans....and had explosions....and sex. That's the three ingredients of a great movie to start with....and then it made fun of Michael Moore (may he suffer in agony forever) as well as Matt Damon. What more can you want?
South park..... Satan + Saddamm Hussein.....the truth at last! Besides it also confirms what we know about canadians. "Their beady little eyes, their flapping heads so full of lies..."

Tedious frat-boy level humour with bad animation or worst puppetry. If this is the end product of 100,000 years of human evolution it's time to crawl back into the ocean and get those gills back.

First time I was told to burn in hell for liking a movie...
Well it has the right ring to it. Would you rather I exclaimed "Wander aimlessly for an extended period of time equal to or less than infinity in purgatory!"

Tedious frat-boy level humour with bad animation or worst puppetry. If this is the end product of 100,000 years of human evolution it's time to crawl back into the ocean and get those gills back.
If you watched the behind-the-scenes bit on the DVD you would realise that the puppetry was intentionally bad to send up Thunderbirds etc. the level of technology used to make them that bad was in fact extensive.
Also their humour is not tedious. It is hilarity of a level not seen since Monty Python

South Park purposley has bad animation. They already had an episode about this. The one where George Lucas and Steven Speilburg go to have a remake of Indiana Jones.

No, by the uncool kids who wear trenchcoats and listen to KMFDM.

Columbine kids then?

If you watched the behind-the-scenes bit on the DVD you would realise that the puppetry was intentionally bad to send up Thunderbirds etc. the level of technology used to make them that bad was in fact extensive.
Also their humour is not tedious. It is hilarity of a level not seen since Monty Python

Monty Python got very tired for me when i hit about 23, to be honest. TV show, anyway. Still have some lingering affection for the films, but i assume it was overexposure to wanky middle class students reciting sketches in the pub ad infinitum whilst i was trying to win at pool.

South Park purposley has bad animation. They already had an episode about this. The one where George Lucas and Steven Speilburg go to have a remake of Indiana Jones.

Great excuse though, if you are shit at animating
"oh, this is a purposefully awful piece of work, it's making an artistic point, innit?"

Attack of the killer tomatoes! lol, definitely the worst movie ever!

Great excuse though, if you are shit at animating
"oh, this is a purposefully awful piece of work, it's making an artistic point, innit?"

Well, it was originally very shitty because they had about as much money to make it as is needed for your average submarine sandwich. I'd imagine they proceeeded with it after three or four seasons because it was still very cost-effective (though done with computers as well), and wouldn't be the same if they changed it.

If you watched the behind-the-scenes bit on the DVD you would realise that the puppetry was intentionally bad to send up Thunderbirds etc. the level of technology used to make them that bad was in fact extensive.
Also their humour is not tedious. It is hilarity of a level not seen since Monty Python
Thunderbirds was made the best part of forty years ago: taking the piss out of that is no longer very incisive, I fear.

The Naked Lunch. Ver crazy and strange but I like strange.

The Naked Lunch. Ver crazy and strange but I like strange.

Well, it's pretty much an unfilmable book but Cronenburg did a decent job of it.

Death Wish 2

Elephant is by far the worst movie ever made.

Death Wish 2

oh god no, Micheal Winner has made FAR shitter movies than that. "Dirty Weekend" springs to mind. A dangerous, insightful neo-feminist piece of literature turned into a very bad version of Death Wish 2...directed by a sexist oaf in a clodhoppingly insensitive style.

Attack of the killer tomatoes! definitely the worst movie ever!


yes, pretty horrible, the cartoon was pretty awesome if I do say so though.

sarcasm.

Moulin Rouge T_T.

Bill and Teds Bogus Journey

also the Keanu Reeves sci fi classic Johnny Neumonic

Tank Girl

Star Wars Episode I

Killer Clowns from Outer Space

I'll check it out if I happen to come across it, then! ;) And scream Bloody Murder if I don't like it... :p


Pearl Harbor wasn't that bad *dodges a thrown shoe*
but that's only if you see it the right way. Put the DVD into your gigantic home-entertainment system, jump to the chapter where the actual attack on Pearl Harbor begins (Warning: Do NOT watch any part of the movie before the Zero's are approaching their targets - do NOT under any circumstances listen to any dialogue before this point!). Then watch the attack, and when it's over - and by this I mean the very moment the attack is over - stop watching. See? Not a horrible film, you've been entertained for about 30 minutes.

Watching only the attack on Pearl Harbor: 6,5/10
Watching the entire film: 2/10


I want my shoe back BTW.

If i want to watch pearl harbor get bombed ill watch the history channel thank you, nothing and not even kate beckinsale can make the movie watchable to me. once is enough

I want my shoe back BTW.

If i want to watch pearl harbor get bombed ill watch the history channel thank you, nothing and not even kate beckinsale can make the movie watchable to me. once is enough

I dunno. She's pretty hot.


I think Magnolia sucked ass.