NationStates Jolt Archive

http://edition.cnn.com/2006/US/02/18/president.mistakes.ap/index.html

And Iraq isn't even there.

Well, THAT lowered my faith in humanity!

Anyone who says the Monica/Clinton scandal was the president's fault needs to be kicked in the face.


And yes, that lowers my faith in humanity too. :\

It has only been 3 years since the invasion, a bit too early to say if it will be conisdered a mistake in the eyes of history or an invasion that was right but was opposed by an ignorant majority.

http://edition.cnn.com/2006/US/02/18/president.mistakes.ap/index.html

And Iraq isn't even there.What did you expect.. after all this is just CNN..

.. this is not a BBC

What did you expect.. after all this is just CNN.. this is not a BBC

Your old account got banned? Have to start working to get you banned on this one....

Number 8 should be edited to: Cancelling the air support for the Bay of Pigs operation.

Number 8 should be edited to: Cancelling the air support for the Bay of Pigs operation.

Very true.

Your old account got banned? Have to start working to get you banned on this one....What? You are going to start modifying my posts again?

Lies and fakes are not going to help you here.
Others will eventually figure your stunts are a fraud.

What? You are going to start modifying my posts again?

Lies and fraud are not going to help you here.

I trust that providence well see to it that, in time, you shall be banished from these forums forever.

I trust that providence well see to it that, in time, you shall be banished from these forums forever.I am surprised the Mods did not take action on you.. about your little stunts using my name.

Guys, take it somewhere else, please.

I am surprised the Mods did not take action on you.. about your little stunts using my name.

Because, generally, I am a good little boy who finishes his milk. Where as you are the bad little boy who must be beaten so you can understand the truth.

Number 8 should be edited to: Cancelling the air support for the Bay of Pigs operation.
Nah--the historians got that one right. What they might have modified it to is a group award that goes to every president since then that upheld the embargo.

Nah--the historians got that one right. What they might have modified it to is a group award that goes to every president since then that upheld the embargo.

Well for those of us that want the Castro regime gone, we think it was a very big mistake.

Nah--the historians got that one right. What they might have modified it to is a group award that goes to every president since then that upheld the embargo.

Supporting the Bay of Pigs operation was the right thing to do. We should never have cancelled air support, though, and we should have provided as much support as necessary to ensure it was a success.

Interesting.

1) Buchanan was an idiot. But labeling him with the Civil War? It was bound to happen.

6) James Madison's failure to keep the United States out of the War of 1812 with Britain.

Interesting. Could it have been avoided?

7: Thomas Jefferson's Embargo Act of 1807, a self-imposed prohibition on trade with Europe during the Napoleonic Wars.

Ok. Why was that bad?

Being american, that's the worst mistake

Well for those of us that want the Castro regime gone, we think it was a very big mistake.If you'd wanted the Castro regime gone, you'd have traded with him and given the Cuban people a taste of capitalism. His rule succeeded because he managed to pit the US as the bully to the north who wanted to oppress them again--and again is the operative word here because they still talk about the Batista puppet regime in Cuba. You'd think that we'd have figured it out after the first twenty years of embargo didn't work.

Anyone who says the Monica/Clinton scandal was the president's fault needs to be kicked in the face.
Really? And here all along I thought that President Clinton really did get those blow-jobs. Tsk! Silly me. :rolleyes:

Supporting the Bay of Pigs operation was the right thing to do. We should never have cancelled air support, though, and we should have provided as much support as necessary to ensure it was a success.
And then what? Installed another puppet regime like the unpopular Batista fiasco? Yeah, that would have been awesome for the Cuban people.

Being american, that's the worst mistake
Being affiliated with German nazis, that's the worst mistake.

Being american, that's the worst mistake

Wow. Did you hurt yourself thinking that one up? :rolleyes:

Really? And here all along I thought that President Clinton really did get those blow-jobs. Tsk! Silly me. :rolleyes:
Oh, he got them, no question. The fact that it became a scandal, however, was hardly his fault. That was the fault of an overzealous prosecutor who couldn't find any actual scandal and so went with the salacious over the substantive. But don't let something like context get in the way of your dismissiveness.

Interesting.

1) Buchanan was an idiot. But labeling him with the Civil War? It was bound to happen.

6) James Madison's failure to keep the United States out of the War of 1812 with Britain.

Interesting. Could it have been avoided?

7: Thomas Jefferson's Embargo Act of 1807, a self-imposed prohibition on trade with Europe during the Napoleonic Wars.

Ok. Why was that bad?
regarding #7 if jefferson took sides the war of 1812 would mostly of been called the war of 1808. He Delibrately took the USA of the maps of europeans who would have teamed up with England to knock us down a peg.
and regarding #6- Most Likely yes if we didn't try to indirectly help napoleon by taking care of some problems he had in Quebec and other French territories in the Americas at that time. It made England delay beating Napoleon for 3 years by wasting time in the US.

and Regarding #1-- the civilwar was gonna happen after the 1850 Comprise. it just was boiling over for 10 years until the south finally said F*** it we don't heed to put up with this crap anymore.

Wow. Did you hurt yourself thinking that one up? :rolleyes:
Probably pulled a groin muscle.

Being affiliated with German nazis, that's the worst mistake.

Nazism as communism, are only dreams, communism preaches equality, when human nature itself can't carry that beautiful desire out, there will be always someone that wants more than the other people.

Nazism was somehow good, but still you can't conquer the world being just one race. You have to be multicultural.

Really? And here all along I thought that President Clinton really did get those blow-jobs. Tsk! Silly me. :rolleyes:

You'll find that many United States presidents had affairs far more lengthy and illustrious than Clinton's.

Why the fuck do leftists always call Batista a "puppet?" Under Batista, only 7% of invested capital in Cuba was American. Less than 1/3 of Cuba's sugar production was by American companies. We never put him in power (he did that himself). We had no control over him. He pretty much did what he pleased. How was he a puppet?

And then what? Installed another puppet regime like the unpopular Batista fiasco? Yeah, that would have been awesome for the Cuban people.

Who said the choice was only between Batista or Castro?

regarding #7 if jefferson took sides the war of 1812 would mostly of been called the war of 1808. He Delibrately took the USA of the maps of europeans who would have teamed up with England to knock us down a peg.
and regarding #6- Most Likely yes if we didn't try to indirectly help napoleon by taking care of some problems he had in Quebec and other French territories in the Americas at that time. It made England delay beating Napoleon for 3 years by wasting time in the US.

and Regarding #1-- the civilwar was gonna happen after the 1850 Comprise. it just was boiling over for 10 years until the south finally said F*** it we don't heed to put up with this crap anymore.

In the case of Jefferson and Madison, we were not exactly friends with GB. I think Jefferson was right because our forces of the time couldn't have made it. Well with Madison; same thing. France was a friend. Ahh well. Madison was not the greatest of Presidents. Brilliant on the Constitution though.....

Why the fuck do leftists always call Batista a "puppet?" Under Batista, only 7% of invested capital in Cuba was American. Less than 1/3 of Cuba's sugar production was by American companies. We never put him in power (he did that himself). We had no control over him. He pretty much did what he pleased. How was he a puppet?
Gee--Eisenhower called him "our guy," as did United Foods, and every one of his policies pretty much benefited US interests. But he wasn't a puppet I guess.

And the Cuban people didn't seem to sad to see him go, that's for sure.

Probably pulled a groin muscle.

Don't you mean hemroids? ;)

You'll find that many United States presidents had affairs far more lengthy and illustrious than Clinton's.

No kidding. Johnson, Kennedy and Harding make him look like a virgin. ;)

No kidding. Johnson, Kennedy and Harding make him look like a virgin. ;)
For a guy who was paralyzed, FDR certainly got around as well.

And of course, there's a sneaking suspicion that Buchanan was gay.

Gee--Eisenhower called him "our guy," as did United Foods, and every one of his policies pretty much benefited US interests. But he wasn't a puppet I guess.

And the Cuban people didn't seem to sad to see him go, that's for sure.

I doubt many tears were shed when Batista left. But he was definitely not a U.S. puppet. In fact, the U.S. indirectly contributed to his downfall (we imposed an arms embargo on his government).

Nazism was somehow good, but still you can't conquer the world being just one race. You have to be multicultural.
Then it wouldn't be Nazism anymore. :rolleyes:

Anyways...getting a blowjob is on the same list as getting yourself into a civil war?

How about interning Japanese innocent civilians? Or bombing the shit out of Dresden? Or the various things Ulysses Grant managed to pull off? Or Washington's slavery bill?

But no, a blowjob is much worse.

Really? And here all along I thought that President Clinton really did get those blow-jobs. Tsk! Silly me. :rolleyes:

Not to mention the little matter of the perjury and obstruction of justice charges. I could care less if he was screwing every single white house staffer, male and female. As South Illyria pointed out, lot's of presidents have done "worse" in that area. And usually it would be a matter of privacy. However, when it becomes an issues in front of the court, lying about it under oath is a serious crime. He was lucky to get away with it.

They forgot the biggest mistake: George Bush Sr. choosing to reproduce.

They forgot the biggest mistake: George Bush Sr. choosing to reproduce.
Or for that matter, Mr. and Mrs. Rove having their son, Karl.

http://edition.cnn.com/2006/US/02/18/president.mistakes.ap/index.html

And Iraq isn't even there.
Give it time. The US invasion of Iraq will go down as the Number One mistake by a President.

You heard it here first. :D

Give it time. The US invasion of Iraq will go down as the Number One mistake by a President.

You heard it here first. :D
Unless by some stroke of luck a flower grows from this giant turd the Bush Administration pooped out in the Middle East and everything magically becomes peaceful.

Unless by some stroke of luck a flower grows from this giant turd the Bush Administration pooped out in the Middle East and everything magically becomes peaceful.
Flowers can't grow through glass can they?

Not to mention the little matter of the perjury and obstruction of justice charges. I could care less if he was screwing every single white house staffer, male and female. As South Illyria pointed out, lot's of presidents have done "worse" in that area. And usually it would be a matter of privacy. However, when it becomes an issues in front of the court, lying about it under oath is a serious crime. He was lucky to get away with it.

Eww he lied about getting a blow job. What a bastard.

For all that family values crap; republicans sure want to know who is getting some....

If you'd wanted the Castro regime gone, you'd have traded with him and given the Cuban people a taste of capitalism. His rule succeeded because he managed to pit the US as the bully to the north who wanted to oppress them again--and again is the operative word here because they still talk about the Batista puppet regime in Cuba. You'd think that we'd have figured it out after the first twenty years of embargo didn't work.

Nazz, I can agree with you on logical grounds which can be subjective, but as I keep pointing out, trade, tourists, diplomatic relations, dialogue, Dollars $ and Euros have not worked either.

The E U, which will do nothing, has taken many years to figure out that diplomatic relations and dialogue with Fidel has not changed anything.

I could have told the E U that from day one, I am sure you could have too.

It is ridiculous that it has taken the E U so many years to understand that diplomatic relations and dialogue with Fidel dosent change anything.

After Fidel dies in power, Fidels' successors might make some changes out of need, but they will not make any changes they feel they do not have to.

I still think some economic, political and social presures will be needed by the E U and the USA on castros' successors for real changes to occur.

I think the so-called embargo that hardly exsists anymore,
helps Fidel more in the world because of his anti Americanism rehtoric than at home, even in Europe, President Bush or no President Bush.

Gracias for your post.

Anyways...getting a blowjob is on the same list as getting yourself into a civil war?

How about interning Japanese innocent civilians? Or bombing the shit out of Dresden? Or the various things Ulysses Grant managed to pull off? Or Washington's slavery bill?

But no, a blowjob is much worse.

Well, it was only number ten. And it was about a lot of other things - both the left and right have reduced it to school yard standards of argument.

But yeah, there's been worse. My guess is it got on the list mostly because it's so recent it's still on many people's minds.

I was glad to see Andrew Johnson got 2nd place for TATRFUing reconstruction.

I also don't understand the placement of Clinton's getting Hail to the Chief played on the presidental flute as one of the all time blunders.

The historians admit that it screwed over his presidency and his place in history, but in terms of effects upon American history or its people...

Yeah, I'd go with FDR's consentration camps or maybe Lincoln's suspension rights during the Civil War as far larger than a blow job.

Eww he lied about getting a blow job. What a bastard.

For all that family values crap; republicans sure want to know who is getting some....

As I said above, I don't care who he screwed. And it was a mistake for SOCUS to allow the case to go forward. But perjury is crime. It's a very serious crime for a good reason. And the matter of the defendant's sex life was germane to the case.

Like I said above, the left and right have reduced the whole matter to the level of the school yard: "He got a BJ, so what?" vs "He lied about it!" That's just stupid, and does no servive to anyone.

Very true.

Novoga and Maghda thank you for your post, please see my post to Nazz, on page 3 post 45.

keep in mind I was very nice in case you have any questions, but.

No no no, you guys have it all wrong.

It's not that Clinton got a blowjob that was the mistake. His mistake was getting a blow from a chubby intern rather than someone much much hotter.

No no no, you guys have it all wrong.

It's not that Clinton got a blowjob that was the mistake. His mistake was getting a blow from a chubby intern rather than someone much much hotter.
That's exactly what I was going to say!
Clinton, for all his charm (and everyone who's met him always say just how charming and personable he is) really had lousy taste in women: Gennifer Flowers, Monica Lewinsky, Paula Jones, Hilary...

Considering they say power is an aphrodisiac you'd think being the most powerful man in the world at that time could have gotten him a better class of tail.

There is not even a mention of Nixon's siding with Yahya Khan all the while knowing that Khan's army was butchering millions in the Bangladesh genocide. No wonder it is called as the forgotten genocide.

No no no, you guys have it all wrong.

It's not that Clinton got a blowjob that was the mistake. His mistake was getting a blow from a chubby intern rather than someone much much hotter.

I have a great Clinton, Monica Lewinsky joke in spanish, translated to english, but not allowed on Nationstates, does anyone know a site I can post it on and redirect you to it, as long as NS rules allow, if NS rules allow this re-direct post name of site and telegram my nation.

Clintons dog letter to Clinton and
Clintons letter to his dog buddy.

There is not even a mention of Nixon's siding with Yahya Khan all the while knowing that Khan's army was butchering millions in the Bangladesh genocide. No wonder it is called as the forgotten genocide.

This is news to me. Can you tell me more?

This is news to me. Can you tell me more?
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bangladesh_Liberation_War#USA_and_USSR
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/1971_Bengal_massacres

This is news to me. Can you tell me more?

Bangladesh was part of Pakistan until 1971. In the general elections a Bangladeshi was elected for Prime Minister. The ethno-chauvinistic Punjabi dominated Pakistani army could not bear the thought of taking orders from a Bengali. So Yahya Khan, the then army chief, annulled the elections.

Protest broke out in Bangladesh and Yahya Khan famously said "kill 3 million of them and the rest would be eating out of our hands". And his general Tikka Khan (known as Butcher of Bangladesh) proceeded to do exactly that. Pakistan was America's bestest allies at that time armed with American weapons and "aids".

Nixon's response?

"To all hands. Don't squeeze Yahya at this time"

http://www.gwu.edu/~nsarchiv/NSAEBB/NSAEBB79/

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bangladesh_Liberation_War#USA_and_USSR


The article is fairly well researched. Did you read this part?

After the USA had failed to act decisively in a manner that would not draw world condemnation to itself, it sought to rope the People's Republic of China into the conflict. The plan was to attack India on two sides with the help of China and thus stopping the attack on East Pakistan. Kissinger's meeting with the Chinese was with this intention.

Here's the irony. The supposedly "we stand for freedom and democracy" USA supported a military action of its dictator ally who derailed a democratic process and proceeded to unleash a genocide and on top of it tried to rope in the other dictatorship China to stop the Indian army's liberation of Bangladesh.

Fortunately for us, the Pakistan army of 90,000 men surrendered en masse without much of a fight and the objective of liberating Bangladesh was achieved before China could open another front. It could have very well precipitated into a world war because the Soviets would have pitched in too, because the Sino-Soviet split was at the peak and the Soviets even moved in their fleet in response to the American seventh fleet moving to the the Bay of Bengal.

For me, that was quite a near miss there. Nixon is my worst president of the USA.

There are others that haven't been mentioned that should've made it over #7 or #10, such as:

Eisenhower having the Shah of Iran assassinated in 1954.
Nixon's CIA organizing the coup in Chile to overthrow Allende in 1973.
Carter's CIA training the Mujahadeen in 1978/79.
Reagan firing the air traffic controllers in 1982.
McKinley starting the Spanish American War in 1898.
Eisenhower's support for Batista.
Reagan's (lack of an) AIDS policy.

snip
You have a TG![/off-topicness]


Sorry everybody for the interruption, please carry on.

How about interning Japanese innocent civilians? Or bombing the shit out of Dresden? Or the various things Ulysses Grant managed to pull off? Or Washington's slavery bill?

The internment of Japanese Civilians wasn't a White House initiative, though they could have stopped it. Bombing Dresden, likewise, was not a decision made by a President; I'd also dispute that it was wrong. US Grant was a crap President, but didn't actually do all that much damage - plus, it was primarily the bad cabinet he ended up with that were the problem, similar to the Ohio Gang in the 1920s.

My main problem with the list is the Woodrow Wilson piece. Wilson should certainly have stood on principle and not signed Versaille - and the Congress was right in refusing to ratify the treaty, thus keeping the US out of the League of Nations, thank goodness.

Wilson's greatest error, however, was in getting the US involved in WWI in the first place. A whole lot of good US troops died for nothing.

There are others that haven't been mentioned that should've made it over #7 or #10, such as:

Eisenhower having the Shah of Iran assassinated in 1954.
Nixon's CIA organizing the coup in Chile to overthrow Allende in 1973.
Carter's CIA training the Mujahadeen in 1978/79.
Reagan firing the air traffic controllers in 1982.
McKinley starting the Spanish American War in 1898.
Eisenhower's support for Batista.
Reagan's (lack of an) AIDS policy.

Obviously they're nowhere near as important as a president having an affair.:rolleyes:

I think going to a theatre with an open door policy should rank top 10. Anyways, I think Lincoln would agree.

Carter's CIA trained the Mujahadeen in 1978/79. How did that not make the list, given that those people now have a global terrorism ring going. Rather more important than Clinton's blowjob, which really had no effect on anything important.

Nah--the historians got that one right. What they might have modified it to is a group award that goes to every president since then that upheld the embargo.
Every president that has upheld the embargo has just continued the suffering of the Cuban people, and done nothing to depose Castro. The embargo has been a miserable failure.

FDR running for a 4th term when he was too sick. And dieing in the arms of his lover

Hoover using a hands off policy on a failing economy.

Ike for doing nothing to limit the growth of the USSR.

Reagan for "Reaganomics" ie "Voodoo economics" Which has devestated the middle class, done nothing for the poor and sent the country into a debt that our great-great Grandchildren won't be able to pay off. (He ran saying Carter had let the country reach a trillion dollar debt. Before he left he tripled it in just 8 years. He then passed this legacy to Bush 1&2.

I offer this... with no apology... and no explanation...
http://www.tmbg.com/SOUND/1.swf

(I got no sleep at all last night)

that list sucked.

didn't even mention FDR's war against the constitution.

plus madison and the war of 1812 shouldn't be on there, and it's short sighted to think that ww2 oculd be avoided by comprimising at versaille.

FDR running for a 4th term when he was too sick. And dieing in the arms of his lover

Hoover using a hands off policy on a failing economy.

Ike for doing nothing to limit the growth of the USSR.

Reagan for "Reaganomics" ie "Voodoo economics" Which has devestated the middle class, done nothing for the poor and sent the country into a debt that our great-great Grandchildren won't be able to pay off. (He ran saying Carter had let the country reach a trillion dollar debt. Before he left he tripled it in just 8 years. He then passed this legacy to Bush 1&2.

Carter was one of the best peacetime presidents, in my opinion.

I thought Clinton had sent us back into the black with regards to the debt situation.

I didnt see anything about Clinton not taking Osama out when he had the chance.:sniper:

Well for those of us that want the Castro regime gone, we think it was a very big mistake.I agree, in my own odd way. The biggest presidential blunders have consistently been the arrogant notion that US presidents somehow have the right, if not obligation, to run all other nations as they see fit.

But then, that's basically what most of that top-10 is about anyway.

Anyone who says the Monica/Clinton scandal was the president's fault needs to be kicked in the face.
\

WHAT so ll bill's other extra marital rels were the women's fault too??
come on now he was a good prez till he got corrupt giving favors to big doners but the guy is a womanizer

and while im a liberal Hillary is NOT the ANSWER in 08 and im a woman so dont start that either

we need a fresh prez with frez ideas from the dems not same old same old

I didnt see anything about Clinton not taking Osama out when he had the chance.:sniper:
He tried to, but was too busy being rediculed by the "liberal" media and Republicans. He also wanted to make sure he had solid evidence and could strike at a time that would minimize civilian casualties unlike this president.

that list sucked.

didn't even mention FDR's war against the constitution.

plus madison and the war of 1812 shouldn't be on there, and it's short sighted to think that ww2 oculd be avoided by comprimising at versaille.

So how could the War of 1812 been avoided? We weren't exactly friendly with Great Britain?

What exactly was FDR's war on the Constitution? Which articles did he violate?

we need a fresh prez with frez ideas from the dems not same old same old

What ideas are that?

What exactly was FDR's war on the Constitution? Which articles did he violate?
He means the internment of Japanese-Americans, and even any Asian looking people living in America during WWII.

EDIT: which, because it was during wartime and he had emergency powers, technically it was constitutional, but not very nice. Especially after they were compensated a mere $10,000 of spending several years in what were basically concentration camps.

Nazism as communism, are only dreams, communism preaches equality, when human nature itself can't carry that beautiful desire out, there will be always someone that wants more than the other people.

Nazism was somehow good, but still you can't conquer the world being just one race. You have to be multicultural.

This may be true, but how can this be good when you also at the same time kill 6,000,000 people of Jewish background, almost 1/3 of the total population, or just people that Hitler thought didn't fit to his liking. Some way to "preach equality".

The internment of Japanese Civilians wasn't a White House initiative, though they could have stopped it.
No, it came from the president; even if he didn't think it up, he wrote and signed Executive Order 9066 which authorized the removal of Japanese-Americans from their homes and placement into internment camps.
http://historymatters.gmu.edu/d/5154

Ironically, the most decorated Army unit in WWII would be comprised of the very nisei America sent into those camps because they were unsure of their loyalties.

What exactly was FDR's war on the Constitution? Which articles did he violate?
He tried to make a single-unit government: the executive branch. He decided that it would be ok for an executive-branch agency to essentially make laws (national labor board). USSC struck that down. So he got pissed at the USSC and wanted to expand it to 13 members so he could pack it with his people and have a big Constitution burning party.

FDR was one of the worst presidents ever. Right up there with Lincoln. Petty dictators, the both of them.

I like how someone getting oral sex ranks on a list that includes mistakes that cost thousands of lives.

I like how someone getting oral sex ranks on a list that includes mistakes that cost thousands of lives.

Well, the whole act literally bogged down the government for over a year, and precious time that could have been used to address the problems we face today was wasted. It's probably the aftermath of the act rather than the oral sex itself that is the main motivation behind its inclusion.

It has only been 3 years since the invasion, a bit too early to say if it will be conisdered a mistake in the eyes of history or an invasion that was right but was opposed by an ignorant majority.
very much in agreement. This will be looked at in history as yet another success in the United States' history to bring freedom to another, all the while being attacked verbally for doing so.

Well, the whole act literally bogged down the government for over a year, and precious time that could have been used to address the problems we face today was wasted. It's probably the aftermath of the act rather than the oral sex itself that is the main motivation behind its inclusion.

Yea, but that was more the doing of the media and people who wanted to make it a scandal than of Clinton himself.

I like how someone getting oral sex ranks on a list that includes mistakes that cost thousands of lives.
Maybe it's there cause the authors aren't getting any themselves. Put in as #10 out of spite and jealousy.

Well, the whole act literally bogged down the government for over a year, and precious time that could have been used to address the problems we face today was wasted. It's probably the aftermath of the act rather than the oral sex itself that is the main motivation behind its inclusion.
No it didn't. What bogged down the government was the interminable investigation into a non-existent scandal. Rememberm the investigation that started all this--the Whitewater scandal--turned out to not be a scandal at all. The Clintons were not only cleared of wrongdoing, but they were called victims by the prosecutor of the Hale trial. Had the investigation ended there, as it should have, then Lewinsky would have never come to light. So it was not the blowjob that mired the government for a year--it was Ken Starr and the right-wing smear machine who did that (not to mention all the Republican congresspeople who accused Clinton of wagging the dog when he tried to take military action against Bin Laden in Afghanistan in 1998).

#10 James K. Polk forgets to remove his mistress's brassiere beforing coming home. Fortunately, his wife was already full of laudenum that night and didn't notice.

#9 Jimmy Carter orders a disastrous special forces mission to rescue the employees of the KFC in Ireland, only to discover that he had misread the report regarding the Embassy in Iran.

#8 George Washington inhales his cigar overzealously, and ignites his wooden teeth. Dedicates his remaing life to making sure Americans will have better dental care than the British.

#7 Ronald Reagan authorizes the "National Medal of Freedom" for Bonzo, his former co-star and now Secretary of the Interior for Monkeys.

#6 Thomas Jefferson asks his wife if she'd be interested in a little "chocolate swirl" with one of the "staff". After failing to play it off as a joke, he has to sleep on the porch.

#5 Bill Clinton loses a "lightsaber duel" in the mensroom with Secret Service Agent Tyrone "The Bone" Billings.

#4 Abraham Lincoln is offered military support from the Tokugawa government of Japan, which he declines because he doesn't realize that they have giant robots.

#3 George W. Bush is offered the cure to all viral pathogens as a peace gift from space aliens, which he declines because the aliens are unable to prove that they are unassociated with Al-Qaida.

#2 John Adams wonders what would happen if he loaded his musket "all the way" with powder. Eyebrows are recovered during second half of term.

#1 Ulysses S. Grant opens his "State of the Union" speech with "Last night, I got so drunk I shit the bed"

Probably pulled a groin muscle.
That was actually a funny one.

You'll find that many United States presidents had affairs far more lengthy and illustrious than Clinton's.
No he probably won't, because (bafflingly enough) he's not interested in attacking other presidents, and frankly, it would appear his schedule is going to be full of more important things here pretty shortly.

Bill Clinton not inhaling.

Really? And here all along I thought that President Clinton really did get those blow-jobs. Tsk! Silly me. :rolleyes:

It was an accident!

Now, wait here while I try and think up how you could accidentally end up in a situation like that...

Oh, I know! He slipped!