Silliopolous
31-01-2006, 20:00
YEs - From the same people (The US Government) that brought you the Terror Alert system, "Ohhhh it's amber today?...I don't remember, is that 'carry on normally but look distrustfully at the other people on the subway?' or is that 'whimper while hitting the refresh on you browser at CNN to see if Butte spontaneously combusted for no good reason?'... c'mon people...don't just color code it -TELL ME HOW FRIGHTENED I NEED TO BE TODAY!!!!!"...well, aparently they discovered that there was still one type of weather just not adequately measured.
You get your windspeed scale for Hurricanes. Your scale for Tornadoes. Your scale for Earthquakes. Wind Chill factors and the Humidex.
Goddamn it though, all they ever talk about with snow is inches.
Now inches may be important... to men AND (most) women....but it just isn't neatly enough compartmented into a few simple categories. So, with that in mind, the NOAA now has NESIS (http://www.noaanews.noaa.gov/stories2006/s2567.htm)
Jan. 30, 2006 — NOAA announced today that for the remainder of the winter season, its scientists will give the public a new, easy-to-understand scale to categorize major snowstorms after they affect the Northeast. The Northeast Snowfall Impact Scale, or NESIS, will quickly calculate the impact of a powerful snowstorm soon after it strikes, and give it a rank, similar to methods used to categorize the strength of tornadoes.
Until now, NOAA scientists had no way of sizing up a snowstorm's intensity with an index as understandable as the Saffir-Simpson scale for hurricanes, or the Fujita scale for tornadoes. While winds are used to measure hurricane intensity, NESIS will rank the severity of an East Coast snowstorm based on snowfall amount and the population of the affected areas. With NESIS, scientists can quickly assess a snowstorm's impact today, compare it with a storm of the past and assign it one of five categories: Notable, Significant, Major, Crippling or Extreme.
"The snowfall impact scale is designed to look retrospectively at a recent snowstorm—not to forecast one," said Uccellini, also a noted winter weather expert. "With its rankings, the scale will also give a better perspective on how these major storms affected populations in the Northeast." The snowstorm that moved through Northeast on December 8-9 was a NESIS category 2 (Significant) storm.
Oh yes. Just what everything needs. Simplicity. Because people are too fucking stupid to figure out how bad the blizzard they had two days ago was.
Not only that, it's not even predictive. It's a simple measurement of inches of snow, and the impact is designated based on how many people it impacted. So three days AFTER the blizzard you'll get to find out if you were Crippled, or if it was only Significant. Of course, by then you've long since dug your way out and got on with your life. But hey - won't it be good to know for sure how bad it was?
Fourteen feet of snow fell in Shitville Vermont? Doesn't register. Sorry guys - you didn't get "Crippled". Why? There just aren't enough of you to matter really...
Does it take into account the type of snow? Nope. Inches only. Let me tell you, anyone who lives through winter knows that eight inches of heavy slush is way more damaging than 18 inches of light fluffy stuff. Especially if it comes with a nice bit of freezing rain thrown in the mix.
And how usefull is this country-wide? Not at all. NorthEast only.
I assume this is based on the realization that anytime two snowflakes fall within a mile of each other in Texas it would qualify as crippling..... so it's hardly worth measuring.
But there you have it. Your tax dollars at work. There are now people getting paid to compare your latest snowfall with previous ones and cheerfully inform you two days later whether it was Significant or not. Because I'm sure that you have all been dying to know this. And rest assured some weather report is going to start telling you this in brethless detail: "This is Frosty McNumbnuts with the FUCKU weather team with a breaking news story. And it's offical. The NOAA has JUST declared that the storm we had three days ago was indeed Crippling. Feel free to now rest easy knowing that you were indeed right to have been really pissed at the weather then - even though it's a lovely day right now. Now, back to whatever stupid reality show it is that you are watching."
So let's all say thank you to the NOAA for something "Easy To Understand".
What's less easy to understand is why they bothered....
You get your windspeed scale for Hurricanes. Your scale for Tornadoes. Your scale for Earthquakes. Wind Chill factors and the Humidex.
Goddamn it though, all they ever talk about with snow is inches.
Now inches may be important... to men AND (most) women....but it just isn't neatly enough compartmented into a few simple categories. So, with that in mind, the NOAA now has NESIS (http://www.noaanews.noaa.gov/stories2006/s2567.htm)
Jan. 30, 2006 — NOAA announced today that for the remainder of the winter season, its scientists will give the public a new, easy-to-understand scale to categorize major snowstorms after they affect the Northeast. The Northeast Snowfall Impact Scale, or NESIS, will quickly calculate the impact of a powerful snowstorm soon after it strikes, and give it a rank, similar to methods used to categorize the strength of tornadoes.
Until now, NOAA scientists had no way of sizing up a snowstorm's intensity with an index as understandable as the Saffir-Simpson scale for hurricanes, or the Fujita scale for tornadoes. While winds are used to measure hurricane intensity, NESIS will rank the severity of an East Coast snowstorm based on snowfall amount and the population of the affected areas. With NESIS, scientists can quickly assess a snowstorm's impact today, compare it with a storm of the past and assign it one of five categories: Notable, Significant, Major, Crippling or Extreme.
"The snowfall impact scale is designed to look retrospectively at a recent snowstorm—not to forecast one," said Uccellini, also a noted winter weather expert. "With its rankings, the scale will also give a better perspective on how these major storms affected populations in the Northeast." The snowstorm that moved through Northeast on December 8-9 was a NESIS category 2 (Significant) storm.
Oh yes. Just what everything needs. Simplicity. Because people are too fucking stupid to figure out how bad the blizzard they had two days ago was.
Not only that, it's not even predictive. It's a simple measurement of inches of snow, and the impact is designated based on how many people it impacted. So three days AFTER the blizzard you'll get to find out if you were Crippled, or if it was only Significant. Of course, by then you've long since dug your way out and got on with your life. But hey - won't it be good to know for sure how bad it was?
Fourteen feet of snow fell in Shitville Vermont? Doesn't register. Sorry guys - you didn't get "Crippled". Why? There just aren't enough of you to matter really...
Does it take into account the type of snow? Nope. Inches only. Let me tell you, anyone who lives through winter knows that eight inches of heavy slush is way more damaging than 18 inches of light fluffy stuff. Especially if it comes with a nice bit of freezing rain thrown in the mix.
And how usefull is this country-wide? Not at all. NorthEast only.
I assume this is based on the realization that anytime two snowflakes fall within a mile of each other in Texas it would qualify as crippling..... so it's hardly worth measuring.
But there you have it. Your tax dollars at work. There are now people getting paid to compare your latest snowfall with previous ones and cheerfully inform you two days later whether it was Significant or not. Because I'm sure that you have all been dying to know this. And rest assured some weather report is going to start telling you this in brethless detail: "This is Frosty McNumbnuts with the FUCKU weather team with a breaking news story. And it's offical. The NOAA has JUST declared that the storm we had three days ago was indeed Crippling. Feel free to now rest easy knowing that you were indeed right to have been really pissed at the weather then - even though it's a lovely day right now. Now, back to whatever stupid reality show it is that you are watching."
So let's all say thank you to the NOAA for something "Easy To Understand".
What's less easy to understand is why they bothered....