NationStates Jolt Archive

I occasionally dabble in the lingustic arts.
Do you?
My favorites, at the moment.
Sent to me, by none other than my mother, via e-mail. :p
Not really sure if this constitutes true lingustic art. Don't really care, I had a good laugh.
---
FROM A SIGN IN A HOSTEL IN FINLAND:
If you cannot reach a fire exit, close the door and expose yourself at the window.
---
A bus stops, and two Italian men get on. They seat themselves, and engage in animated conversation. The lady sitting behind them ignores their conversation at first, but her attention is galvanized when she hears one of the men say the following:

"Emma come first. Den I come. Den two asses come together. I come once-a-more. Two asses, they come together again. I come again and pee twice. Den I come one lasta time."

"You foul-mouthed swine," sputters the lady indignantly. In this country we don't talk about our sex lives in public."

"Hey, coola down lady," said the man. "Who talkin abouta sexa? I'ma justa tellun my frienda how to spella Mississippi."
---
Linguistic humor, Roe v. Wade
Q:
What is Bush's position on Roe v. Wade?

A:
He really doesn't care how people get out of New Orleans.

<snip>

Funny.... old, but funny.
I'm still trying to figure out what this has to do with linguistics, though...

Funny.... old, but funny.
I'm still trying to figure out what this has to do with linguistics, though...
I'm not plugged in here, I have no idea what is old.

Anyhow, I was trying to invite other people to share funny things, when I said, "Do you?" And I also pointed out that I had no idea if this was true lingustics or not.

Thanks for respondin'. :)

I occasionally dabble in the lingustic arts.

Once a woman is introduced to Colonel Angus, she'll settle for nothing less.

Daddy, they say all the womenfolk just love Colonel Angus!

Hmm.. I don't know why people make such a big fuss over Colonel Angus!

I myself never much cared for Colonel Angus! He rubs me the wrong way. I'm not sure why.. can't put my finger on it..

Once a woman is introduced to Colonel Angus, she'll settle for nothing less.
Certainly. :p
*snickers*

Well, in Japan, there's no L. So, for all the L sounds they replace them with R + a vowel.

Guess what happened on Election Day...

First post!

First post!
Welcome to NS! :D

Well, in Japan, there's no L. So, for all the L sounds they replace them with R + a vowel.

Guess what happened on Election Day...

First post!
They realised it was stupid to name major nation events in a foreign language?

FROM A SIGN IN A HOSTEL IN FINLAND:
If you cannot reach a fire exit, close the door and expose yourself at the window.
Bzzz, wrong. This is probably made up.

What would be plausible, then? Original was something like: "Ellei hätäpoistumistietä voi käyttää, sulkekaa ovi ja poistukaa ikkunan kautta." Then, it'd be "If the emergency exist is unusable, close the door and evacuate thru the window", or "... void yourself thru the window".

Bzzz, wrong. This is probably made up.

What would be plausible, then? Original was something like: "Ellei hätäpoistumistietä voi käyttää, sulkekaa ovi ja poistukaa ikkunan kautta." Then, it'd be "If the emergency exit is unusable, close the door and evacuate thru the window", or "... void yourself thru the window".
:D

While putting up the sign however, the interpreter would over hear a number of American turists debating why an emergency exit could ever be unusable. Its an emergency exit for crying out loud! What is there, a fire behind it? Debris? Impossible!
Then, while inspecting their phsyical and mental condition, one must surely take into account their uttler lack of ability to save themselves. Fat. Thick. Even if they were on the ground floor, they'd have trouble. Better to just leave the saving to the professionals.

Not that'd it matter if a naked person was standing in the window or not in Finland. Its totally normal.
*sauna joke*
*maybe just me though*

sign in China.
"People, Flowers and help each other in breath. If you pluck the flowers and break off the branches, you will reduce your own life at the same time"

Sign in Japan
No Smorking

Sign: "Fuk Mi: Sushi & Seafood Buffet"

Sign: Bar GET SOME.

Phone Card: Good Day Nice Meat You.

T-shirt slogan: God Breath You

I love Engrish.

I love Engrish.

Me to ^.^

Miykael: Main screen turn on!
VladJr.x2: All your supporters are belong to sin
God: *gawk*
Miykael: Ahw!!!
VladJr.x2: Make your time....
Bwahahaha!

* screen fades into static*

:D'

( \:Bored:/ )

They realised it was stupid to name major nation events in a foreign language?
Heh, good call.

http://i16.photobucket.com/albums/b24/cabrawest/gas.jpg

I occasionally dabble in the lingustic arts.
Do you?
My favorites, at the moment.
Sent to me, by none other than my mother, via e-mail. :p
Not really sure if this constitutes true lingustic art. Don't really care, I had a good laugh.
---
FROM A SIGN IN A HOSTEL IN FINLAND:
If you cannot reach a fire exit, close the door and expose yourself at the window.
---
A bus stops, and two Italian men get on. They seat themselves, and engage in animated conversation. The lady sitting behind them ignores their conversation at first, but her attention is galvanized when she hears one of the men say the following:

"Emma come first. Den I come. Den two asses come together. I come once-a-more. Two asses, they come together again. I come again and pee twice. Den I come one lasta time."

"You foul-mouthed swine," sputters the lady indignantly. In this country we don't talk about our sex lives in public."

"Hey, coola down lady," said the man. "Who talkin abouta sexa? I'ma justa tellun my frienda how to spella Mississippi."
---
Linguistic humor, Roe v. Wade
Q:
What is Bush's position on Roe v. Wade?

A:
He really doesn't care how people get out of New Orleans.

You might dig "Bulbous Bouffant", by The Vestibules.
Kinda catchy.

Sign: "Fuk Mi: Sushi & Seafood Buffet"


Not that I mean to rain on your parade, but it would be "Fuku Mi". And, yes, it could be pronounced the same (or nearly the same).

You might dig "Bulbous Bouffant", by The Vestibules.
Kinda catchy.
I'll assume thats a band.
I'll go and look today. :p

A Chinese family (Chu, Bu, Fu, si Su) moves to the US. Wishing to be integrated into the American society, they decide to change their names. Chu becomes Chuck, Bu changes his name into Buck, and their sisters Fu and Su return to China. :)

I'll assume thats a band.
I'll go and look today. :p
It's worth it!
Oh yeah! *in best Kool-Aid Man fashion*

It's worth it!
Oh yeah! *in best Kool-Aid Man fashion*
*thinks of Dane Cook skit*
*laughs*

*thinks of Dane Cook skit*
*laughs*
Good. Good. If i'm lucky my band'll cover it here soon. Glad you enjoyed it.
Now a quick name-drop of Tom Lehrer, and my work here is done.
That, and i have to go sleep now.

If ya got some good Dane Cook names, i'll check 'em out.

Good. Good. If i'm lucky my band'll cover it here soon. Glad you enjoyed it.
Now a quick name-drop of Tom Lehrer, and my work here is done.
That, and i have to go sleep now.

If ya got some good Dane Cook names, i'll check 'em out.
I seem to have this knack of getting lost in converations here on NS.

I haven't listened to anything of "Bulbous Bouffant", by The Vestibules yet...I gotta check today because I got some free time while I'm in town....

What are you talking about? Name-dropping? Ehh...ehh...ooo....
*crawls into corner and cowers*

Once a woman is introduced to Colonel Angus, she'll settle for nothing less.

Daddy, they say all the womenfolk just love Colonel Angus!

Hmm.. I don't know why people make such a big fuss over Colonel Angus!

I myself never much cared for Colonel Angus! He rubs me the wrong way. I'm not sure why.. can't put my finger on it..

You cunning linguist, you. ;)

Not that I mean to rain on your parade, but it would be "Fuku Mi". And, yes, it could be pronounced the same (or nearly the same).
Solly, lain not pledicted in folecast. :D
http://www.engrish.com/image/interface/fukmi.jpg

Solly, lain not pledicted in folecast. :D

lol.

I'm told that back when I lived in another city (Perth), there were two chinese stores next to eachother near where I lived - one was a butcher I think. "Chu Fat" and "Kum Soon".

I vaguely remember the buildings - they were definitely there - but I can't remember reading that (then again, wouldn't have meant much to me at the time, I was young), so no idea if i'm being had. Anyone speak Chinese?

Uhmmm... actual product... not making this up... really... it's true!
http://www.oxygen.ie/unilife/pics/engrish%20homosausage.jpg

Uhmmm... actual product... not making this up... really... it's true!
http://www.oxygen.ie/unilife/pics/engrish%20homosausage.jpg

LOL.

I seem to have this knack of getting lost in converations here on NS.

I haven't listened to anything of "Bulbous Bouffant", by The Vestibules yet...I gotta check today because I got some free time while I'm in town....

What are you talking about? Name-dropping? Ehh...ehh...ooo....
*crawls into corner and cowers*
Sorry, my bad ... Dane Cook - comedian that Cobbleism loaned me - another happy coinkydink.
I was mistakenly under the impression you meant the Dane Cook reference to The Vestibules, not to the Kool-Aid Man.