NationStates Jolt Archive


Finally, valid reasons agianst gay marriage (Joke)

Mazalandia
13-01-2006, 12:45
10 Best reasons Gay Marriage is wrong :)

1. Being gay is not natural. Real Americans always reject unnatural things like eyeglasses, polyester, and air conditioning.

2. Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay, in the same way that hanging around tall people will make you tall.

3. Legalizing gay marriage will open the door to all kinds of crazy behavior. People may even wish to marry their pets because a dog has legal standing and can sign a marriage contract.

4. Straight marriage has been around a long time and hasn't changed at all; women are still property, blacks still can't marry whites, and divorce is still illegal.

5. Straight marriage will be less meaningful if gay marriage were allowed; the sanctity of Britany Spears' 55-hour just-for-fun marriage would be destroyed.

6. Straight marriages are valid because they produce children. Gay couples, infertile couples, and old people shouldn't be allowed to marry because our orphanages aren't full yet, and the world needs more children.

7. Obviously gay parents will raise gay children, since straight parents only raise straight children.

8. Gay marriage is not supported by religion. In a theocracy like ours, the values of one religion are imposed on the entire country. That's why we have only one religion in America.

9. Children can never succeed without a male and a female role model at home. That's why we as a society expressly forbid single parents to raise children.

10. Gay marriage will change the foundation of society; we could never adapt to new social norms. Just like we haven't adapted to cars, the service-sector economy, or longer life spans.
Cannot think of a name
13-01-2006, 12:47
In a forum this active you'll have to imagine that whatever it is you're about to cut and paste has already been cut and pasted about a dozen times at least, especially if it's on a hot button topic like this.
The Infinite Dunes
13-01-2006, 13:03
Funny: 1,2,4,5 and 10. Thought I'd change 2 to make some joke about a child hanging out with someone taller and then getting taller.

I've heard 6 and 7 used in arguements and as for 9... well... in some parts of Britain it's pretty much an unwritten law. Even in cities the with up 300,000 people in them. :(
Mazalandia
13-01-2006, 13:04
In a forum this active you'll have to imagine that whatever it is you're about to cut and paste has already been cut and pasted about a dozen times at least, especially if it's on a hot button topic like this.

I did not see it, although I'm pretty blind. (took me three minutes to find again :) )
Like I said though valid points.
I personally have increased the height of three people by two inches after prolonged period of presence
Cannot think of a name
13-01-2006, 13:15
I did not see it, although I'm pretty blind. (took me three minutes to find again :) )
Like I said though valid points.
I personally have increased the height of three people by two inches after prolonged period of presence
Look in any thread on the subject, sometimes it'll appear twice.
Mazalandia
13-01-2006, 13:22
Look in any thread on the subject, sometimes it'll appear twice.
I don't have that kind of attention span:)

I just check the general forum.
SuperQueensland
13-01-2006, 17:14
10 Best reasons Gay Marriage is wrong :)

6. Straight marriages are valid because they produce children. Gay couples, infertile couples, and old people shouldn't be allowed to marry because our orphanages aren't full yet, and the world needs more children.



theres actually someone seriously arguing that on the "homosexuality is so yesterday" board
Kinwara
13-01-2006, 17:19
LoL. I think most of these are pretty funny... but some are kinda weird.
Czardas
13-01-2006, 17:42
Old news.

Ok, it was funny the first 75 times or so, but after that it started to get annoying....