NationStates Jolt Archive

Inspired by Eutrusca's "Jokes about old people"-thread, I started to think about the whole thing. Getting old and stuff. I mean, is it really so great to live untill you have no freakkin' clue of what's happening around you, you have no hair, you hear nothing, see very little, understand even less and can't even go to toilet alone anymore, not to mention having sex?!

I think live hard - die young is much better guideline. Not too young of course, but certainly before senility.

Opinions?

(poll possibly coming later on)

Never. When I get old my brain shall be deposited in a giant robot. With laser eyes.

Never. When I get old my brain shall be deposited in a giant robot. With laser eyes.

Fair enough. :D

That's all a thing of the past for anyone born in say, the 70s or later. 80s, maybe. Telomere rebuilding, caloric restriction simulation, and stem cell manipulation will in the very near future extend life into the 180s or so; editing ancient retroviruses out of our DNA could make aging all but obsolete. And that's just biological/genetic/medical solutions to death and aging....uploads'll be here by the 20s and 30s, and then the whole concept will be blown out of the water, for anyone who doesn't mind transcending biological existence.

I once had a premonition that I would die on October 12, 2026. I think that's long enough for me.

depends what life's like when i get old. if i have loved ones around (not just to 'take care of me' but to be with and just in general) then getting real old and losing my grip on things wouldn't be so bad.

but as for dying: old, in my sleep, nice and peaceful if you please.

When I've made a change.

Sam Kinison wote a lot of comedy about this. About not being called, as he put it, 'A life hog'. He was of the opinion that you should check out about 60-65 or so.

Some other things he said:

"If salt and sugar kick you ass, it's time to get in the box!"

"So I'm at the pee trough. This guy comes in about 80-82. He grabs the wall next to me to take a piss and starts making these noises, 'ooohh. aaaaahhh. oooohh.' Like they're pulling a broom out of Mr. Ed's ass. ... ...I said 'what are these noises about! Buddy! If it hurts to piss that bad, die! Lay down and die!"

"See, the indians never wore Depends. They knew when to die. An indian would've gone, 'Uh-oh. Pee-pee hurt. Time to die."

"See, the indians never wore Depends. They knew when to die. An indian would've gone, 'Uh-oh. Pee-pee hurt. Time to die."

That's why the great and mighty spirit of the rocks and the trees and the lakes invented clothes pins.

Later.

Not today. I still have too much shit to do.

Before all the cancers, heart problems, and senility my family's prone to really kick in; aged 70, that'd do me.

When would you like to die?

I don't know. Surprise me.

Well, my plan is that when I get to be a little too old for my liking, I'll have someone ship me off to a war-torn nation (doesn't matter which) with a machinegun-equipped, armored wheelchair. It could be fun.

As for me, if everything goes as planned, I won't leave a corpse behind and nobody will know when or if I died.

Barring that, as my bones grow more brittle, I will probably die trying to play rugby in a wheelchair and shatter my spine in a nasty tackle.

I want to die from laughing really hard while high at the age of 80 yrs.

I intend to see Halleys Comet return, as I just missed it last time. In 2061 I'll be, ermm... 74? That's a good age to go. I want the best view in the house - right in front of it...

Odds are good that with my tendency towards violence and such, I won't make it past 50. Personally, that may not be such a bad thing.

Ideally, after space tourism has become an accessible reality (so that I could avail of said service).

Failing that, before any serious mental and mobility issues would manifest themselves.

Depending on what I've done by then, I'd like to die around 50-60 quickly.

I'd rather not die at all. Fortunately, as a Christian, I don't have to. I'll merely pass from one world to another.

before I get old and feeble. I want to die in combat, serving my nation. In a big battle! maybe be standing there, and hear a whistling sound from above. go "oh shit..." Andhave a few 155mm shells or 500kg bombs come down on my posistion. 45-50ish sounds about good for me, no "oh my back hurts, my knees hurts, I dont like heavy metal and everyone drives to fast" for me. That and I'l get a nice pompous state funeral with a canadian flag on my coffin.

when its time to die

When I am ready

I used to want to die at 45. For a long time, I used that date to see me through life. That was what I was living for, the thought that in a few years, it would all be over, everything would be over and I could finally let myself die.

Now, I've got a promise that keeps me here.

Never. I'm afraid

I dunno - my great grandma died shortly before her 90th birthday. She went out, mowed the lawn, said she felt tired and came in to get a drink. She poured herself some iced tea, sat down in a chair and fell asleep. An hour or so later when someone checked on her again, she was dead. Seems like a good way to go.

Alternatively, I could go my grandma's route and just refuse to die repeatedly. She's had about everything except cancer, and just won't die - she's almost 98 now, and starting to talk about what she wants for her 100th birthday party.

With that family history, I think I've got a decent chance at that, too, so that's my plan.

Inspired by Eutrusca's "Jokes about old people"-thread, I started to think about the whole thing. Getting old and stuff. I mean, is it really so great to live untill you have no freakkin' clue of what's happening around you, you have no hair, you hear nothing, see very little, understand even less and can't even go to toilet alone anymore, not to mention having sex?!
No, it's not so great to live beyond your usefulness. I fully intend to pull a Nez Perce Indian trick when I realize that I'll soon be unable to take care of myself.

IMHO, people who hang on too long become a burden to those around them and a net drain on society. So, although I probably wouldn't become a financial drain on my family, I don't want to become any sort of burden to them whatsoever.

Never. I'm afraid

Why be afraid? I have no desire to ever die either, but not because of fear. It's like being afraid of a dreamless sleep, or a coma; it's oblivion. The next step down from hibernation. Not something to afraid of, though definitely something to avoid.

It depends on if I'm a vegetable when I'm elderly or not.

But, I prolly won't be, I'm taking decent care of myself.

Never if i have the choice. I will take the first immortality serum, pill...whatever that works. Of course it'd be hard to prove...but still, i want to live as long as possible.

"The secret to staying alive, is not dying." - Me

I used to want to die at 45. For a long time, I used that date to see me through life. That was what I was living for, the thought that in a few years, it would all be over, everything would be over and I could finally let myself die.

Now, I've got a promise that keeps me here.

:fluffle:
I love the one you gave this promise!!!
we all should love him, cause Cabra will stay with us 4ever....

:fluffle:
I love the one you gave this promise!!!
we all should love him, cause Cabra will stay with us 4ever....

Yay!
Go Cabra, go cabra, go cabra!

Yay!
Go Cabra, go cabra, go cabra!

Alright, I'll go, I'll go. Just tell me where...

Alright, I'll go, I'll go. Just tell me where...

My place?;)

Alright, I'll go, I'll go. Just tell me where...
yor need another door to be openend?

My place?;)

*lol
Can I bring a friend?

*lol
Can I bring a friend?
Do you mean Mr. Teddy? Or one of those real friends?

*lol
Can I bring a friend?

Depends, is he/she, messy, drinks a lot of alcohol and starts singing terrible songs?
Otherwise they can't

Hmm... dying...

Seeing as I believe I did die for a few minutes (seconds?), I am really afraid of dying. I just hope my life will be full and rich, and that I will have touched the lives of others and be missed.

Depends, is he/she, messy, drinks a lot of alcohol and starts singing terrible songs?
Otherwise they can't

He's messy all right, and he drinks serious amounts of alcohol. But he's a good singer, I'm afraid...

...and that I will have touched the lives of others and be missed.

Funny... that's just what I don't want to be, missed. I have a very bad consience indeed thinking about causing people I love distress.

After I accomplish my goals and before my loved ones go

I'd like to die when I choose to die.

I plan on dying 742 seconds after the destruction of the planet earth by aliens/nukes. I will survive the aliens/nukes and when the world is destroyed I'll get bored of waiting to float to another planet and spontaneously implode.

I posted this before, but what they hey, it seems entirely appropriate here:
Let Me Die a Youngman's Death

Let me die a youngman's death
not a clean and inbetween
the sheets holywater death
not a famous-last-words
peaceful out of breath death

When I'm 73
and in constant good tumour
may I be mown down at dawn
by a bright red sports car
on my way home
from an allnight party

Or when I'm 91
with silver hair
and sitting in a barber's chair
may rival gangsters
with hamfisted tommyguns burst in
and give me a short back and insides

Or when I'm 104
and banned from the Cavern
may my mistress
catching me in bed with her daughter
and fearing for her son
cut me up into little pieces
and throw away every piece but one

Let me die a youngman's death
not a free from sin tiptoe in
candle wax and waning death
not a curtains drawn by angels borne
'what a nice way to go' death

Not by me sadly. I wish I had this guy's talent. It's Roger McGough.

Here's one of his new poems which I think Eutrusca will enjoy:
PAY-BACK TIME

O Lord, let me be a burden on my children
For long they've been a burden upon me.
May they fetch and carry, clean and scrub
And do so cheerfully.

Let them take it in turns at putting me up
Nice sunny rooms at the top of the stairs
With a walk-in bath and lift installed
At great expense.....Theirs.

Insurance against the body-blows of time
Isn't that what having children's all about?
To bring them up knowing that they owe you
And can't contract out?

What is money for but to spend on their schooling?
Designer clothes, mindless hobbies, usual stuff.
Then as soon as they're earning, off they go
Well, enough's enough.

It's been a blessing watching them develop
The parental pride we felt as each one grew.
But Lord, let me be a burden on my children
And on my children's children too.