NationStates Jolt Archive

In 1966, a brave young man named Hal Warren set out to make a film on a bet. He collected a few of his friends, a couple of dogs, a camera, and the deserts around El Paso and started working on "The Lodge of Sin", which would later be renamed "Manos: The Hands of Fate" and be classified as the 2nd worst movie ever made in the history of film.

Seeing Hal Warren as a visionary ahead of his time, I, Keruvalia, amateur filmmaker, have decided to remake "Manos" and pay homage to this great acheivement in film. Sadly, Mr. Warren departed this world on December 26, 1985 and will not see his legacy come to fruition as I, Keruvalia, will also strive to create the much anticipated sequel (as noted by the ? after the "The End").

Yes ... I am serious. The cast is in place. I am merely waiting on permission from Hal Warren's son. Filming is slated to begin in February.

Huzzah!

That fertilizer salesman turned movie director would be proud...perhaps your attempt will resurrect MST3K, but that's only hoping...

The weirdest thing is the number of people involved with the movie who committed suicide shortly thereafter in El Paso.

In 1966, a brave young man named Hal Warren set out to make a film on a bet. He collected a few of his friends, a couple of dogs, a camera, and the deserts around El Paso and started working on "The Lodge of Sin", which would later be renamed "Manos: The Hands of Fate" and be classified as the 2nd worst movie ever made in the history of film.

Seeing Hal Warren as a visionary ahead of his time, I, Keruvalia, amateur filmmaker, have decided to remake "Manos" and pay homage to this great acheivement in film. Sadly, Mr. Warren departed this world on December 26, 1985 and will not see his legacy come to fruition as I, Keruvalia, will also strive to create the much anticipated sequel (as noted by the ? after the "The End").

Yes ... I am serious. The cast is in place. I am merely waiting on permission from Hal Warren's son. Filming is slated to begin in February.

Huzzah!

LMAO

Huzzah!Two questions...
1) what was the "worst film in history" if Manos was second.

2) can I get a copy when you're done filming it?

Two questions...
1) what was the "worst film in history" if Manos was second.

Plan 9 From Outer Space

2) can I get a copy when you're done filming it?

Yes.

That fertilizer salesman turned movie director would be proud...perhaps your attempt will resurrect MST3K, but that's only hoping...

Now that would be something. I do miss that show terribly.

Is there room for a down on his luck former Star High school Quarterback who had a big time contract to play in Poland only to have a fateful accident with a hedgeclipper and now is a Janitor with a speech impediment?

In 1966, a brave young man named Hal Warren set out to make a film on a bet. He collected a few of his friends, a couple of dogs, a camera, and the deserts around El Paso and started working on "The Lodge of Sin", which would later be renamed "Manos: The Hands of Fate" and be classified as the 2nd worst movie ever made in the history of film.

Seeing Hal Warren as a visionary ahead of his time, I, Keruvalia, amateur filmmaker, have decided to remake "Manos" and pay homage to this great acheivement in film. Sadly, Mr. Warren departed this world on December 26, 1985 and will not see his legacy come to fruition as I, Keruvalia, will also strive to create the much anticipated sequel (as noted by the ? after the "The End").

Yes ... I am serious. The cast is in place. I am merely waiting on permission from Hal Warren's son. Filming is slated to begin in February.

Huzzah!

I'm not sure weather to have you killed, kiss you, or send you a recording of my Torgo impression. Maybe a combo?

Torgo: N-o Fra-nk. Th're ahr no Bum kne-es in my world*.
TV's Frank: But what about your voice?
Torgo: Wh-at about m-y voice?
Frank opens mouth to speak, but then pauses and closes it.
Torgo: Come Frank, to where all the toady's and lacky's live together in peace.

*Second Banana Heaven (with Joe Bessier and Robin!)

Now that would be something. I do miss that show terribly.

I, a resident of Canada who has only seen the shows through DVD's or (oh the shame) downloads, miss the show so terribly, I still cry at night.

My only problem with the show was the Canada Song, which I am not sure if it funny or just an angry tirade aginst my country. Blame Canada was less vulgar.

Wow, that's the best micro-cinema idea I think I've heard in a long ass time. I salute you, sir. If I could afford to go to Texas and stay long enough to work on a film I would totally be offering my services. It can't be any worse than the film that people where serious about that I worked on last October, and that had an award winning producer and actual film professionals working on it. What a train wreck...

Anyway, I wish I could help because the idea kicks ass. As it is, I offer my support anonymously on the internet, which would of course be helpful....

Check out these people (http://www.microcinemascene.com/) for support or help or just to be able to go, "Well, I'm not that fuckin' bad..."

I, a resident of Canada who has only seen the shows through DVD's or (oh the shame) downloads, miss the show so terribly, I still cry at night.

My only problem with the show was the Canada Song, which I am not sure if it funny or just an angry tirade aginst my country. Blame Canada was less vulgar.
It was a Wisconsin show, I'm sure it was a good natured teasing the neighbor thing...

Yes, I know. I shouldn't take it so personally.

Bumped because I am serious.

I also need to keep tabs on this thread because I did seriously ask the creator's son for permission.

Wow, that's the best micro-cinema idea I think I've heard in a long ass time. I salute you, sir. If I could afford to go to Texas and stay long enough to work on a film I would totally be offering my services.

Well we'd love to have you. :)

Unfortunately, it will have to be a local collaboration - like the original Manos. Maybe it will be like "Blair Witch" and we'll be able to fly you in to help with the sequal.

My only problem with the show was the Canada Song

You sure you're not thinking of South Park and not MST3K?

You sure you're not thinking of South Park and not MST3K?

http://www.mst3kinfo.com/ward_e/Song910.html

Well we'd love to have you. :)

Unfortunately, it will have to be a local collaboration - like the original Manos. Maybe it will be like "Blair Witch" and we'll be able to fly you in to help with the sequal.
It's cool. I'm just a PA which half the time you can get for free.

And if you need a film school grad just go to a video rental store where half my graduating class ended up (ugh...)...

Sign me up for a copy at the very least.

http://www.mst3kinfo.com/ward_e/Song910.html

Oooh ok. I don't remember that song. But, then, I didn't pay much attention after Dr. Forrester's mother started showing up.

Bumped because I am serious.

I also need to keep tabs on this thread because I did seriously ask the creator's son for permission.


More power to ya brah!

Manos was indeed a stinker of such magnitude.

I do however, disagree with the title of "Worst Movie".

"Plan 9" wasnt even Ed Woods worst film, let alone the worst ever.
However, the worst one, was indeed a Wood film.

"Orgy of the Dead", has got to be #1.
The sub-title should have been "Even titties cant save this film".

Manos is certainly worthy of the top ten, even possibly top five, but "Orgy of the Dead" makes "Plan 9", look like Citizen Kane, by comparison.

You sure you're not thinking of South Park and not MST3K?
No, he's referring to MST3K. I distinctly remember a line like "those bacon-loving, francophilic bastards..." I don't remember which movie - some Canadian piece of crap. It might have been the one with the chess club kid and a treasure map and a cult of Canadian deer campers and a fat beery loser named Rausdauer. :D

http://www.mst3kinfo.com/ward_e/Song910.html
oops, thanks. (gotta read the whole thread.)

More power to ya brah!

Manos was indeed a stinker of such magnitude.

I do however, disagree with the title of "Worst Movie".

"Plan 9" wasnt even Ed Woods worst film, let alone the worst ever.
However, the worst one, was indeed a Wood film.

"Orgy of the Dead", has got to be #1.
The sub-title should have been "Even titties cant save this film".

Manos is certainly worthy of the top ten, even possibly top five, but "Orgy of the Dead" makes "Plan 9", look like Citizen Kane, by comparison.
IMO, "Catalina Caper" was the single worst flick ever done on MST3K, which makes it a contender for worst movie of all time.

IMO, "Catalina Caper" was the single worst flick ever done on MST3K, which makes it a contender for worst movie of all time.
Overdrawn at the Memory Bank would be my vote.

Overdrawn at the Memory Bank would be my vote.
That wasn't the one with the Papa Gino's at Burlington Square Mall in Burlington, Vermont, standing in for the society of the future, was it?

That wasn't the one with the Papa Gino's at Burlington Square Mall in Burlington, Vermont, standing in for the society of the future, was it?
No, that one was extra bad as well. The one with the airplane that was a time machine, right? Oh crap that was bad.

No, this one was some local public channel film that inexplicably had Raul Julia in it. (http://imdb.com/title/tt0089759/) Not even that early in his career. Oh man was it bad...

EDIT: Actually it might be, I don't know much else about how it was filmed

More power to ya brah!

Manos was indeed a stinker of such magnitude.

I do however, disagree with the title of "Worst Movie".

"Plan 9" wasnt even Ed Woods worst film, let alone the worst ever.
However, the worst one, was indeed a Wood film.

"Orgy of the Dead", has got to be #1.
The sub-title should have been "Even titties cant save this film".

Manos is certainly worthy of the top ten, even possibly top five, but "Orgy of the Dead" makes "Plan 9", look like Citizen Kane, by comparison.



what about santa claus conquers the martians???

or Abraxas: Guardian of the Universe (http://www.badmovies.org/movies/abraxas/index.html) with jesse ventura defends the universe



Well we'd love to have you. :)

Unfortunately, it will have to be a local collaboration - like the original Manos. Maybe it will be like "Blair Witch" and we'll be able to fly you in to help with the sequal.


hopefully if there is a sequel it wont be as bad as the blair witch sequel.

No, that one was extra bad as well. The one with the airplane that was a time machine, right? Oh crap that was bad.

No, this one was some local public channel film that inexplicably had Raul Julia in it. (http://imdb.com/title/tt0089759/) Not even that early in his career. Oh man was it bad...
Oh, yeah, I did see that one. Damn, that stank. I don't remember what it was about. I only remember staring at Raoul Julia in uncomprehending horror and wondering why he wasn't dancing the Mamushka.

what about santa claus conquers the martians???
What, you don't like Christmas movies? :D

Oh, yeah, I did see that one. Damn, that stank. I don't remember what it was about. I only remember staring at Raoul Julia in uncomprehending horror and wondering why he wasn't dancing the Mamushka.
It was some sort of unholy marriage of Brazil and Tron with a reference to Casablanca. Any further explination would cause unpleasent flashbacks...

What, you don't like Christmas movies? :D


best christmas movie ever

next to: die hard, and gremlins.

I wish you well.

I own Manos, but I have not been able to bring myself to watch it. I love bad movies, but...what if I like it?

I had to see Robot Monster again, bought it, and now I watch it every so often when I want to laugh at the ridiculous dialogue and sexist situations. But I like it for those things. The diving helmeted-ape-suited robot, the way everyone kept picking up the female lead and carrying her away from danger as if she couldn't walk, etc.

Can Manos really be that much worse?

best christmas movie ever

next to: die hard, and gremlins.
Great minds think alike. :) How about I Come in Peace, the Dolph Lundgren Xmas classic also starring the immortal Matthias Hues? Heartwarming.

I wish you well.

I own Manos, but I have not been able to bring myself to watch it. I love bad movies, but...what if I like it?

I had to see Robot Monster again, bought it, and now I watch it every so often when I want to laugh at the ridiculous dialogue and sexist situations. But I like it for those things. The diving helmeted-ape-suited robot, the way everyone kept picking up the female lead and carrying her away from danger as if she couldn't walk, etc.

Can Manos really be that much worse?
Yes, it can, and I'll sum up how in just two words which will resonate with all true Manos followers:

White Underwear.

:cool:

Great minds think alike. :) How about I Come in Peace, the Dolph Lundgren Xmas classic also starring the immortal Matthias Hues? Heartwarming.


I Come In Peace was the best movie since House Party 4

I Come In Peace was the best movie since House Party 4
I believe we may have great deal in common, Mr/Ms. Minoriteeburg.

I believe we may have great deal in common, Mr/Ms. Minoriteeburg.


It's Mr. and by the sequels of beastmaster don't you forget it.:headbang:

I'm going to go out on a limb here and ask if I'm the only person on the planet who wants to see a Torgo spin off of Manos? I really think Torgo is a strong enough character to carry his own movie, maybe even his own series, maybe even a cooking show.

It's Mr. and by the sequels of beastmaster don't you forget it.:headbang:
Fine, fine, relax, baby. If we had gender-indicative smilies to put in signatures, we could avoid these hassles. FYI, it's Ms. Muravyets.

I'm going to go out on a limb here and ask if I'm the only person on the planet who wants to see a Torgo spin off of Manos? I really think Torgo is a strong enough character to carry his own movie, maybe even his own series, maybe even a cooking show.

TORGO TORGO TORGO TORGO TORGO TORGO!!!!!!!!!! HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!
YEAH TORGO!!!

I have never been able to finish Manos. Ever. Hobgoblin makes weep. Manos made me want to kill myself, but hobgoblin made me want to kill others. Especially that porn loving cople who screw in the van.


urrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgh.

Overdrawn at the Memory Bank would be my vote.

I actually really really liked that movie. I thought its only problem was that it lacked a budget. I enjoyed it.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v606/jaguar1024/torgo.gif

I just met a fella named Torgo!

I have actually taken it upon myself to play the part of Torgo.

I just hope I can get the facial expressions right, plus I have to learn to walk with big knees. Really big knees.

I have actually taken it upon myself to play the part of Torgo.

I just hope I can get the facial expressions right, plus I have to learn to walk with big knees. Really big knees.


you know what they say about people with big knees.....

you know what they say about people with big knees.....

*tee hee*

I have actually taken it upon myself to play the part of Torgo.

I just hope I can get the facial expressions right, plus I have to learn to walk with big knees. Really big knees.
Stuff your pants with toilet paper for practice.

what about santa claus conquers the martians???

or Abraxas: Guardian of the Universe (http://www.badmovies.org/movies/abraxas/index.html) with jesse ventura defends the universe






hopefully if there is a sequel it wont be as bad as the blair witch sequel.

Santa V Martians is truly, a spewage of fine filth.

However, it and the Jesse Ventura film have one thing in common.

So bad you can laugh at them.

Manos was almost so bad it wasnt funny.
Almost..

"Orgy of the Dead" is so bad, it makes baby Jesus cry.

I have actually taken it upon myself to play the part of Torgo.

I just hope I can get the facial expressions right, plus I have to learn to walk with big knees. Really big knees.
I thought he was supposed to have goat legs stuffed into pants.

I Come In Peace was the best movie since House Party 4
Sweet crap, I've seen both of those movies....I really watch too many movies...(at the very least, two more than I should have...)

I thought he was supposed to have goat legs stuffed into pants.

That is entirely possible. I don't see hooves, but one never knows. I'll just wear cricket pads under my pants and that should do the trick.

Now for the great news. I GOT PERMISSION!! :D

Direct quote: "Honestly, I cannot imagine why anyone would want to go to the trouble of remaking that film, but I wish you all the luck."

Cast is in place, costumes are being made, location has been secured. Filming will commence ASAP. Woooo!

That is entirely possible. I don't see hooves, but one never knows. I'll just wear cricket pads under my pants and that should do the trick.

Now for the great news. I GOT PERMISSION!! :D

Direct quote: "Honestly, I cannot imagine why anyone would want to go to the trouble of remaking that film, but I wish you all the luck."

Cast is in place, costumes are being made, location has been secured. Filming will commence ASAP. Woooo!
Congratulations! :D

(<note to self: say hi to Keruvalia if I ever run into him at his job at 7-11 ten years from now; try not to mention touchy subject of "movie.">)

That is entirely possible. I don't see hooves, but one never knows. I'll just wear cricket pads under my pants and that should do the trick.

Now for the great news. I GOT PERMISSION!! :D

Direct quote: "Honestly, I cannot imagine why anyone would want to go to the trouble of remaking that film, but I wish you all the luck."

Cast is in place, costumes are being made, location has been secured. Filming will commence ASAP. Woooo!


Congrats, man!

You ever hear of Low Budget Productions?
They make movies much Troma did back in the day.
They manage to get thier films distributed in Best Buy, often accompanying
other films in packs.
Teen Ape, ring a bell to anyone?

You could get this on the shelf at Best Buy.

Now that I have helped you, I get a mention in the credits!
Whoohoo!

Congrats, man!

You ever hear of Low Budget Productions?
They make movies much Troma did back in the day.
They manage to get thier films distributed in Best Buy, often accompanying
other films in packs.
Teen Ape, ring a bell to anyone?

You could get this on the shelf at Best Buy.

Now that I have helped you, I get a mention in the credits!
Whoohoo!
Hollywood Video and Blockbuster Video accept films on consignment, as well as most any record store that also carries videos. Tower Records generally has a person whose job it is to handle consignments. Netflix also has a content person (I saw them advertise for that position before). Places like Customflix in Santa Cruz duplicate and assist with that kind of thing as well. You can get it 'out there,' though you're not really likely to make back even the duplication costs. But I suspect that's not as important to you.

There is a local production group 'round here that does the DIY thing and actually makes enough money to keep them going, but they've hit a niche in the Hispanic gangster films. And then there is the link I provided earlier in the thread for the micro cinema scene.

Congratulations on getting permission. What are you going to be shooting on? Not film I imagine. Panasonic DVX-100A/B? Canon XL-1? Panasonic AG-HVX200 High Def camera? You can pick that monkey up for $6000, shoots 24 frames per second (film speed) high def, but only onto P2 cards. If you can rent one of those with the equipment needed you could get a pretty close to film look. Or buy one and then when you don't need it anymore in an unbelievable act of generosity send it to me.




It was worth a shot...

Wait, I figured out a job I could do without being in Texas-Editor! I have Final Cut Pro. I don't have a dv deck, though, so I couldn't do log and capture...and I guess if you have someone who could do log and capture you would also have someone who could edit...rats, I almost had it...