NationStates Jolt Archive

Well NSers I persisted with my pursuit of a lovely young lady, whom I love, and was able to jump from the friend ladder to the romantic ladder. The naysayers in NS said it could not be done but I'm glad to have proved them wrong. In fact we both feel it's a better relationship starting out as friends then if we just jumped into bed together. (SIGH). :)

*observes rise in 'faith in romance' indicator*

*observes rise in 'faith in romance' indicator*
You can say that again!!!!!!!!!!!!! ;)

I dunno... I think those are the best kinds of relationships. You already know you're compatable.

That's because the ladder theory is bullshit.

Well NSers I persisted with my pursuit of a lovely young lady, whom I love, and was able to jump from the friend ladder to the romantic ladder. The naysayers in NS said it could not be done but I'm glad to have proved them wrong. In fact we both feel it's a better relationship starting out as friends then if we just jumped into bed together. (SIGH). :)
Of course it can be done, I did it as well. And you're right, your relationship probably will be better as you started out friends. Yay you :)

The man who wrote the ladder theory is... rather bitter. Personally, I think relationships work out best if you start as friends. Congrats!

hooray! :fluffle:

congrats :)

now I when someone says it's impossible I can say "no, I kinda know of someone who said it worked out for them" :D

Ladder Jump! Yaayyy! I got a NinjaBitch once, sigh, I'll never get that far up the ladder again...

Great now i give it 4 weeks before she finds it weird breaks u with you and then finds it weirder still so much she feels uncomfortable around you.

Good for you. However, I will still stand and say that most of the time such situations DO NOT work out.

Shame on you for giving people hope. ;)

Well NSers I persisted with my pursuit of a lovely young lady, whom I love, and was able to jump from the friend ladder to the romantic ladder. The naysayers in NS said it could not be done but I'm glad to have proved them wrong. In fact we both feel it's a better relationship starting out as friends then if we just jumped into bed together. (SIGH). :)
bah humbug before you know it...something bad will happen

Great now i give it 4 weeks before she finds it weird breaks u with you and then finds it weirder still so much she feels uncomfortable around you.

That happened to me, only other way around. (yes we had been friends for 2 years before dating) I felt weird, broke up with her, felt weird more so and feel uncomfortable around her.Ahh the many regrets of life!

i dont really like or dislike the ladder theory, it has ups and down, but i do have to point out that jumping ladders is part of the theory

That's because the ladder theory is bullshit.

Here, here

Me and my GF started out as friends, and it has been an absolutely perfectly relationship so far. That's what happens when bitter guys try to generalize life

That happened to me, only other way around. (yes we had been friends for 2 years before dating) I felt weird, broke up with her, felt weird more so and feel uncomfortable around her.Ahh the many regrets of life!
It is an unholy union that can either be great or spell utter doom.

i dont really like or dislike the ladder theory, it has ups and down
Was that meant to be a bad joke, or did it just come out as one?

Me and my last girlfriend had just met 2 hours before we started hooking up. We ended up going out for 4 months but had to break up when we decided that we didn't have enough time for the relationship and agreed it'd be best to be friends. Cause neither of us were getting any.

Edit: And we're still friends

i dont really like or dislike the ladder theory, it has ups and down, but i do have to point out that jumping ladders is part of the theory

I've read the ladder theory, it seems to me it's only for guys who want to attact immature, ignorant, arrogant girls with no self esteem. I guess if a guy likes that in a girl, then the theory works out just fine. Which is cool, because I'm really not one to knock other people's prefs. Different storkes for different folks, I guess.

I do agree however, that is has some good points. Like the "ladders", but I think they make the "ladder jump" sound harder than it is. Unless a guy is amazingly awesome (uber-rare), I'm going to want to start as friends.

I've read the ladder theory, it seems to me it's only for guys who want to attact immature, ignorant, arrogant girls with no self esteem. I guess if a guy likes that in a girl, then the theory works out just fine. Which is cool, because I'm really not one to knock other people's prefs. Different storkes for different folks, I guess.

I do agree however, that is has some good points. Like the "ladders", but I think they make the "ladder jump" sound harder than it is. Unless a guy is amazingly awesome (uber-rare), I'm going to want to start as friends.

Look re-read it does'nt say the ladder of people you're going to fuck right now it's the ladder of people you would fuck. So when you 'start out as freinds' but you're not hooking up it means the guy is on the good ladder just not high enough yet. And the guys you're just freinds with (that is they are freinds and never going anywhere else with it) are on the other ladder....

Look re-read it does'nt say the ladder of people you're going to fuck right now it's the ladder of people you would fuck. So when you 'start out as freinds' but you're not hooking up it means the guy is on the good ladder just not high enough yet. And the guys you're just freinds with (that is they are freinds and never going anywhere else with it) are on the other ladder....

What about those of us who don't screw? And if you're just friends, you're just that. So they are still on the friends ladder. When you start hooking up with them or starting a relationship, that's when they jump ladders. When they are in the "still friends" phase, I won't touch them. Therefore, they aren't on the "good" ladder. Also, I generally don't look at a guy and go "I'm going to date him" the "I'm going to date him" comes after I got to know him a developed a friendship with him. And like I said, I don't screw anyone, so is everyone just on my constant bad ladder? lol

once and for all, THE LADDER THEORY IS BULLSHIT. So you can stop taking it seriously now.

Great now i give it 4 weeks before she finds it weird breaks u with you and then finds it weirder still so much she feels uncomfortable around you.
It's almost 8 weeks. you lose!!!! HAHAHHA :)

That happened to me, only other way around. (yes we had been friends for 2 years before dating) I felt weird, broke up with her, felt weird more so and feel uncomfortable around her.Ahh the many regrets of life!
A few years ago I slept with a girl who was one of my best friends. At first I was confused because I thought it was the start of something more but quickly figured out she didn't think that. Everything was normal after that.

What about those of us who don't screw? And if you're just friends, you're just that. So they are still on the friends ladder. When you start hooking up with them or starting a relationship, that's when they jump ladders. When they are in the "still friends" phase, I won't touch them. Therefore, they aren't on the "good" ladder. Also, I generally don't look at a guy and go "I'm going to date him" the "I'm going to date him" comes after I got to know him a developed a friendship with him. And like I said, I don't screw anyone, so is everyone just on my constant bad ladder? lol

Look would you say that everyone you are 'just freinds' with is a potential mating partner? No. So those who are 'just freinds' and have the potential to be more are on the good ladder the rest are'nt. The ladder only describes potential not actuality. Now if you're going to say that every guy you meet has the opportunity to get into bed with you then you have one ladder and I'll think you're lying.

So what exactly is this ladder theory?...

http://www.laddertheory.com/ratingsystem.htm

My goodness but is this one weird thread.

The debate over the merits and faults of the ladder theory system seems to be so trivial. Does it really matter? The kid succeeded, congratulations! Nothing else needs to be said.

Look would you say that everyone you are 'just freinds' with is a potential mating partner? No. So those who are 'just freinds' and have the potential to be more are on the good ladder the rest are'nt. The ladder only describes potential not actuality. Now if you're going to say that every guy you meet has the opportunity to get into bed with you then you have one ladder and I'll think you're lying.

OK, I guess I'm a liar. It's SO totally like, awesome when people you've never met before know more about you than you know about yourself. Oh, and like I said, nobody gets into bed with me, I have far too much catholic guilt for that. So yeah...anyone of my guy friends (who hasn't tried anything already or hasn't totally pissed me off) does have the chance for a relationship, he just has to do things properly. So ::gasp:: I only have one ladder and an abyss. But wait...that's impossible :rolleyes:

Yep it's impossible. Don't take it personaly I'm a man I'm used to women lying to me.

OK, I guess I'm a liar. It's SO totally like, awesome when people you've never met before know more about you than you know about yourself. Oh, and like I said, nobody gets into bed with me, I have far too much catholic guilt for that. So yeah...anyone of my guy friends (who hasn't tried anything already or hasn't totally pissed me off) does have the chance for a relationship, he just has to do things properly. So ::gasp:: I only have one ladder and an abyss. But wait...that's impossible :rolleyes:

If there was a battle between Catholic Guilt and Jewish Guilt who would win?

Yep it's impossible. Don't take it personaly I'm a man I'm used to women lying to me.

I can't say I blame them.

Wtf is ladder theory?

It's almost 8 weeks. you lose!!!! HAHAHHA :)
This thread hasn't been going 8 weeks.........
4 Weeks from when i made the comment and you have to act like you normally would.

*stabs the corpse of that stupid, stupid ladder theory*

Good for you, son. Bad for me, though. I was just getting over a crush on a friend of mine....bah! I hate you. *mutters*

Well NSers I persisted with my pursuit of a lovely young lady, whom I love, and was able to jump from the friend ladder to the romantic ladder. The naysayers in NS said it could not be done but I'm glad to have proved them wrong. In fact we both feel it's a better relationship starting out as friends then if we just jumped into bed together. (SIGH). :)


good for you. Now go away. Love sucks.

*stabs the corpse of that stupid, stupid ladder theory*

Good for you, son. Bad for me, though. I was just getting over a crush on a friend of mine....bah! I hate you. *mutters*
You leave Preebles alone!:eek:

once and for all, THE LADDER THEORY IS BULLSHIT. So you can stop taking it seriously now.

No don't you see. Purple Thoughts sleep FURIOUSLY!!!!

I can't say I blame them.
I don't blame them either. I take it as a natural part of the environment like weather.....

Ladder? I thought most people took the elevator.

You leave Preebles alone!:eek:

Nah, not Preebs. She's all yours H-man.

Ladder? I thought most people took the elevator.

True, unless the building is burning.

Nah, not Preebs. She's all yours H-man.
By the power of Greyskull, I have the power!!!

Wait, what?

By the power of Greyskull, I have the power!!!

Wait, what?

o.O

This thread hasn't been going 8 weeks.........
4 Weeks from when i made the comment and you have to act like you normally would.
I didn't start the thread until we'd been going out for eight weeks. :)

The ladder theory is stupid.

The ladder theory is stupid.

Oh gee thanks for that brilliant imperical proof. Why did'nt I see your logic earlier!

I didn't start the thread until we'd been going out for eight weeks. :)
Well i still stand by the 4 weeks from when it was made, and if that doesn't work out then i give it to the end of the Holidays and if you are still going out all the best to you.

Every serious relationship I've had has been with someone who was a friend before we got 'intimate'.