NationStates Jolt Archive


Cheerleader Accidentally Puts “I” In “Team”

Harlesburg
21-12-2005, 09:43
Cheerleader Accidentally Puts “I” In “Team”
BALTIMORE, MD—Riverside High School cheerleader Rachel Brenning was kicked off the cheerleading team and given 3 days detention after making a terrible mistake during a cheer at a home basketball game last week. Brenning was doing her part in her squads famous home court “go team” cheer when she accidentally yelled out the letter “I” instead of the letter “A” during the ritual cheer spelling of the word “team.”

“I am deeply offended and shocked by what occurred at our basketball game last week.” Riverside High School principal Jane Martin told reporters. “Never in this great schools history has our school spirit been so decimated by the actions of one person. The behavioral administration and myself have yet to determine whether or not the actions of Ms. Brenning were in fact planned or if this was just some kind of mishap. Either way, Rachel will suffer the same consequences; we take a lot of pride in our school, especially in extra curricular activities. She needs to learn her lesson.”


http://www.onthejohnnews.com/images/cheerleader.jpg
Above: Riverview High School chearleader Rachel Brenning sheds a tear after being escorted from the gymnasium.


Brenning, a junior at Riverside High School, assured reporters that what occurred was a terrible mistake, and she begged for her peer’s forgiveness. “I am so sorry everyone,” Brenning pleaded, “please forgive me. I would never do anything like this on purpose, I hope that everyone will see that, and find it in their hearts to forgive me.” Brenning has accepted her punishment of staying off the cheerleading squad for the remainder of this school year, but she hopes that she will be allowed to tryout again next year. “I know I probably deserve to be kicked off the squad for the rest of my life, but if everyone could forgive me, I promise I won’t make the same mistake again.”

The Riverside basketball team was playing a tournament game against across town rivals, Hopkins High School, when the terrible destruction of the “go team” cheer occurred. “I remember watching my son lay down some terrific defense,” Bob Jackson, father of Riverside Senior Tim Jackson recalled. “I happened to look down at the cheerleaders because I thought one was about to fall over and I thought I might have been in for a show. The girls were doing this cheer where they yell ‘go, go, go team’ and then they spell out ‘G-O-T-E-A-M’ and each cheerleader yells out a different letter. When it was Brenning's turn to say ‘A’ she shouted ‘I’ instead and the entire gymnasium got silent. Even the players stopped in the middle of the game.”

Riverside Cheerleading director Merriam Woods responded quickly and decisively in the moment of crisis. “I knew what I had to do, but I was heart broken by Brenning’s traitorous deed,” Woods explained. “I found myself in shock but had to shake myself out of it and apprehend Ms. Brenning and escort her from the gymnasium. The girl was in tears by the time I got her outside, but I didn’t buy into her little ‘it was an accident’ show. We rehearsed that cheer so many times that there was no way anyone could mess it up. Rachel should have been shouting ‘A’ in her sleep. Our squad jackets even say ‘there is no “I” in “Team”’ on them, this was blatant sabotage and I’m surprised the district hasn’t had Brenning transferred.”

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With only three games left in the cheerleading season, Riverside's hopes of making it into the Maryland cheerleading convention were destroyed by the actions of Rachel Brenning. Although it hasn’t been determined whether the event was a mistake or if it was on purpose, cheerleading commissioner Sandra D’witt assured Riverside that the actions of their squad member have scarred not only their school but the entire cheerleading profession. “By inviting Riverside to the cheerleading finals we would be supporting that which has made a mockery of not only cheerleading, but any team sport or activity in general,” D’witt explained. “The only hopes Riverside has now is to represent their school at the national chess tournament where the individual is important, and egotistic snobs can run wild.”

The Baltimore School District has placed Riverside’s cheerleading program on temporary probation until more information surrounding the event can be retrieved.

I was always under the belief that there was no I in TEAM but there was ME seeing as i figured i am such a sporting star and all.

EDIT 9:43...
http://www.onthejohnnews.com/2004/007/cheerleader.htm
Stone Bridges
21-12-2005, 09:45
Wow, some people take cheerleading waaaayyyy too seriously.
Harlesburg
21-12-2005, 09:51
Wow, some people take cheerleading waaaayyyy too seriously.
It is a very old article by the way.
Alinania
21-12-2005, 09:56
Ah, but what about individuality? Creativity? Uniqueness?
Let everyone yell whatever they want and let anarchy rule the world :D
Ancient Valyria
21-12-2005, 10:00
:cool: it's time to put the FUN back into FUNERAL
Stone Bridges
21-12-2005, 10:02
:cool: it's time to put the FUN back into FUNERAL

and thus begins the short live career of Grimey the clown!
Harlesburg
21-12-2005, 10:03
Ah, but what about individuality? Creativity? Uniqueness?
Let everyone yell whatever they want and let anarchy rule the world :D
Perhaps one of their Star players wasa Vietnamese boy named Teim?

GO TEIM!
Oscurosa
21-12-2005, 10:04
Well, I put the ARSE in arsenal.

Muahahahaha!
Ancient Valyria
21-12-2005, 10:09
and thus begins the short live career of Grimey the clown!
http://www.omygod.org.uk/images/Pierrot.jpg
Automagfreek
21-12-2005, 10:10
And I put the LAUGHTER in SLAUGHTER! ;)
Stone Bridges
21-12-2005, 10:12
And I put the LAUGHTER in SLAUGHTER! ;)

You're slashly the clown aren't ya?
Oscurosa
21-12-2005, 10:13
There's no 'u' in team either.

To be completely silly, I can put the 'actor' in 'tractor'.
Ancient Valyria
21-12-2005, 10:13
There's no 'u' in team either.
there's 'u' and 'i' in unit though ;)
Oscurosa
21-12-2005, 10:15
Psst. Can anyone tell me where Baltimore is?
Antikythera
21-12-2005, 10:15
this is a joke right?
Harlesburg
21-12-2005, 10:16
Well, I put the ARSE in arsenal.

Muahahahaha!
I think they managed that all by themselves.:p
Terrorist Cakes
21-12-2005, 10:17
I cunfose letters all the time. Maybe that's why I didn't make the cheerleading teim...
Grainne Ni Malley
21-12-2005, 10:17
People actually expect these girls to be able to spell and jiggle their pom-poms at the same time? What is the wirld coming to?
Sierra Cadillac
21-12-2005, 10:18
Am i missing something or do you all not see how fake that is. the tear is fake, the high school is fake, and even if the high school wasn't, he calls it Riverside in one sentence, but below the picture he calls it Riverview or something, and no one would make a big deal or notice if that even did happen, especially in Baltimore. That was so idiotic, i mean everyone was being sarcastic right?
Harlesburg
21-12-2005, 10:21
Am i missing something or do you all not see how fake that is. the tear is fake, the high school is fake, and even if the high school wasn't, he calls it Riverside in one sentence, but below the picture he calls it Riverview or something, and no one would make a big deal or notice if that even did happen, especially in Baltimore. That was so idiotic, i mean everyone was being sarcastic right?
LOL i thought it was fake but it is all in good fun.
Terrorist Cakes
21-12-2005, 10:21
Am i missing something or do you all not see how fake that is. the tear is fake, the high school is fake, and even if the high school wasn't, he calls it Riverside in one sentence, but below the picture he calls it Riverview or something, and no one would make a big deal or notice if that even did happen, especially in Baltimore. That was so idiotic, i mean everyone was being sarcastic right?

Well, I became suspicious after noting several comma splices.
Sierra Cadillac
21-12-2005, 10:24
sorry to sort of blow up there.
Harlesburg
21-12-2005, 10:41
Sorry i forgot the link.....
http://www.onthejohnnews.com/2004/007/cheerleader.htm
Evilness and Chaos
21-12-2005, 10:43
No, the people who had to read it all looking for grammar/consistancy errors are the fools... the first freaking sentance tells you it's a pastiche.

Either that or the cheerleaders live in Nazi Germany... hmmm.
Harlesburg
21-12-2005, 10:57
No, the people who had to read it all looking for grammar/consistancy errors are the fools... the first freaking sentance tells you it's a pastiche.

Either that or the cheerleaders live in Nazi Germany... hmmm.
Cheerleading is a highly competitive sport in America....
Taffers United
21-12-2005, 11:10
Detention because of a simple spelling error?
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Seriously, its just ONE letter out of place woop dee doo! Thats just crazy and F***** up! (the punishment that is)
Stolen Dreams
21-12-2005, 11:18
Cheerleading is a highly competitive sport in America....

And behold, such geniuses the nation raise!
Harlesburg
21-12-2005, 11:20
And behold, such geniuses the nation raise!
Have you never seen bring it On?
And i am not talking purely for the Kirsten Dunst Factor.;)
Kazcaper
21-12-2005, 13:37
What a ridiculous over-reaction. Sure, the girl should know how to spell by now, but everyone slips up from time to time.
I V Stalin
21-12-2005, 13:45
To those questioning if it's real or not, take a look at some of the other 'stories' (including 'Ass Cracks Being Surgically Lowered' and 'Sedna: Size Doesn't Matter'), the links down the left of the page (with 'news' sites such as 'The Fake News' and 'The Toque - Canada's Source for Humour and Satire'), or the statement at the bottom - 'Your Fifth or Sixth Choice for Satirical News'.
Of course it's real.
Randomlittleisland
21-12-2005, 18:25
"There's no 'I' in team but there is a 'me' if you look carefully."

I forget who said it.:)
Harlesburg
22-12-2005, 10:38
And I put the LAUGHTER in SLAUGHTER! ;)
http://blog.fatbusinessman.com/blog-post-images/tshirt-laughter.png
Forfania Gottesleugner
22-12-2005, 10:46
There definately were a few people who could not tell that was a false article right from the get go. To those people I say "...", nothing because they that may provoke them to touch the keyboard again and get hurt.
Harlesburg
22-12-2005, 11:02
There definately were a few people who could not tell that was a false article right from the get go. To those people I say "...", nothing because they that may provoke them to touch the keyboard again and get hurt.
LOL i am more disappointed that more people didn't vote Franchise player.