NationStates Jolt Archive

The Uber Religion Bashing Thread for NS!!!

It's what the thread says, this will be the big consentration thread for ALL Religion-Bashing (and bashing of Philosophies, like Ayn Rand's Objectivism for example).

In essense, bash whatever religion you wish in this thread.

Christianity, Islam, Buddhism, Shinto, Scientology, Raelism, Judaism, etc.

Bash em all, or bash the bashers (if that is your inclination).


My Bashing Post
----------------

Christianity is an evil death cult that seeks Total Control of the Planet and will kill entire civilizations to get it.

The religion is the heart of all evils and problems in the world today and for World Peace to occur, Christianity must be destroyed in all forms!!!



I'm sure you all know what to do now.;)

I always considered that whole "Peoples' Temple" movement a bit nutty, but that's probably just me.

Well, being an apathetic agnostic, i simply dont care.

I hereby choose to bash both sides of the American Christian/Atheist debate. They conspire together to set up a strawman then one attacks it while the other defends it. A drama of complete pointlessness.

Satanism's exalting of vengeance and encouraging of the self are stupid. The effects of a combination of vengeance and pride (which, by its very nature, spirals out of control if it is not tightly reined in) can be seen in Israel, Berlin 1945, or IRA bombings.

[/soapbox] :D

Hmm ur plan didnt go to plan did it, judging on the pussie replies u got lol just joking. O well this is a stupid idea im not even an athiest

Wow... The one thread where it's OK to bash people's beliefs and no takers...:confused:


Who'd a thunk it?:(

Hmm ur plan didnt go to plan did it, judging on the pussie replies u got lol just joking. O well this is a stupid idea im not even an athiestIs that a prerequisite? Surely there must be one religion you don't like, right? What, there must be more than a thousand different Gods throughout known history. You can't possibly like all of them :p

Post it Euro, post thread-lock one more time. For old time's sake. [/parody]

...(and bashing of Philosophies, like Ayn Rand's Objectivism for example).
Is it just me, or has Objectivism gotten a lot more attention around here since I showed up? When I first came here it didnt seem like many people knew who it was, and now it seems like its being mentioned in almost every other [philosophical] thread. I'll admit it's a bit gratifying, but it's sort of eerie too.

Bash em all, or bash the bashers (if that is your inclination).
Um, no. That would be flaming. This thread is borderline enough as it is; in fact I wouldn't be surprised if another mod disagrees with me [that it's at least nominally legitimate] and lock it on the grounds that it's probably just begging for flamebait. I'd prefer to give it a chance, but I don't know how long that will last.

-snip-

good luck with that.

I'm against Bush's Faith-based religion.

Goddamn you, Ahura Mazda!!!!?! :mad:

Is it just me, or has Objectivism gotten a lot more attention around here since I showed up? When I first came here it didnt seem like many people knew who it was, and now it seems like its being mentioned in almost every other [philosophical] thread. I'll admit it's a bit gratifying, but it's sort of eerie too.


Um, no. That would be flaming. This thread is borderline enough as it is; in fact I wouldn't be surprised if another mod disagrees with me [that it's at least nominally legitimate] and lock it on the grounds that it's probably just begging for flamebait. I'd prefer to give it a chance, but I don't know how long that will last.

Think of this as the dumping ground of ALL the religious bashing that's been going on in NS...

A free speech zone that is surrounded with barbwire and riot police to contain the plague that is "Freedom", if you will.

God I love Analogies! *give Analogies kisses*:fluffle:

I'm against Bush's Faith-based religion.

As opposed to those other, faithless religions? :p

I think that I should go on the record here, and say that the cult I created last Friday to worship me as the reincarnated form of Hector Berlioz was a pretty stupid idea. I'm sorry, but the concept of those people who serve me well coming back to this world as musically talented cats made a lot more sense when I was drunk and no one was taking me seriously.
However, my original vision for a unified appreciation of Romantic Era Composers seems to have been lost, as is evidence by the Holy War that started yesterday between my Grand Conductor and the Maestro guiding the Cult of Felix Mendelssohn. The Maestro and his followers may be "immoral heathens worthy of nothing better than death and dismemberment for their inability to realize the true glories of me and Hector Berlioz", but that is no reason to firebomb a nursery. Especially since there were no "immoral heathens worthy of nothing better than death and dismemberment for their inability to realize the true glories of me and Hector Berlioz" actually in the nursery at the time. Come to think of it, they were just being a bunch of jerks when they did that.
Aside, I think thay really need to stop making virgin sacrifices to me. There is only so muuch rape and cannabalism a guy can take, and I think that I'm about to top out for the month of December. At least give me enough time to finish one before shoving the next one through my window.
Finally, they need to respect the law of the land and be more realistic. I can't afford to get another noise violation because you were playing the Symphonie Fantastique loud enough to break windows at three in the morning. Also, I never said that complete ascetism was required by my followers, so they need to quit setting fire to all their worldly belongings. I can't keep feeding them, eventually my room mate is going to notice that someone has been stealing his Coa-Coa Pebbles supply.

So, now referring to my 200 followers, step off, bitches! I'm not going to keep caring for you, and if you know what's good for you, you'll quit asking. If you all aren't out of my hair by 4 AM on Wednesday, I am going to go Marshall Applewhite on your asses.

I think we should bash the Amish more. They're the only religion it's safe to bash. How would they ever find out?

I think we should bash the Amish more. They're the only religion it's safe to bash. How would they ever find out?
They have spies among us. Anyone could be a spy for the Amish, especially Keruvalia!
Very much like Communists, are the Amish, always appearing everywhere in an attempt to erode our freedoms and destroy our precious buttons!

I would like to bash the members of the Jedi religion. Jedi's arent' real, get that NOT REAL!!!!!!!!!!!! (yes, Harrison Ford is real, but he wasn't a Jedi, and as far as Mark Hamill, I doubt he is real because he was supposed to show up at a convention, but he didn't)

anyway, go choose something real to believe in like Christianity or Athieism.


you don't like it, why don't you use the force to shut me up, oh yeah, you can't

hahahaha


*hopes that my friend who thinks he is a Jedi doesn't read this*

*appologizes to any Jedi that really can use the force, don't hurt me*

I hate these goddamn Zeus worshippers. FU and don't push your lamb sacrifices on me!!!

I guess I'll bash the Flying Spaghetti Monster religion. Lasagna is a superior noodle.

Is it just me, or has Objectivism gotten a lot more attention around here since I showed up? When I first came here it didnt seem like many people knew who it was, and now it seems like its being mentioned in almost every other [philosophical] thread. I'll admit it's a bit gratifying, but it's sort of eerie too.

It is just you (and that enormous ego of yours). :eek: ;) :D

I guess I'll bash the Flying Spaghetti Monster religion. Lasagna is a superior noodle.


A HERITIC!!!!!!!!!!! Bring out the Holy Pot of Boiling Dihydrogen Oxide!!!!!!

It is just you (and that enormous ego of yours). :eek: ;) :D
I prefer "magnanimous" :p

Geez, I'm out of practice in the bashing department, but here goes:

Everyone whose religion does not call for them to love their enemies and do good to those who hate them should be lined up against a wall and shot. All people who have no compassion should be slaughtered without mercy. Proponents of the Death Penalty should be summarily executed.

Oh, and everyone who somehow thinks their religious faith is a Patriotic Duty should be hanged for treason.

Also, Paradox and Irony must be outlawed.

How'd I do?

How'd I do?
Perfect.

Is it just me, or has Objectivism gotten a lot more attention around here since I showed up? When I first came here it didnt seem like many people knew who it was, and now it seems like its being mentioned in almost every other [philosophical] thread. I'll admit it's a bit gratifying, but it's sort of eerie too.


Probably because no one really talked about it until you came along I would imagine. And as this is NS general, anyone who makes any remotely positive statement, is just asking to have their beliefs bashed.

I would like to bash the members of the Jedi religion. Jedi's arent' real, get that NOT REAL!!!!!!!!!!!! (yes, Harrison Ford is real, but he wasn't a Jedi, and as far as Mark Hamill, I doubt he is real because he was supposed to show up at a convention, but he didn't)

anyway, go choose something real to believe in like Christianity or Athieism.


you don't like it, why don't you use the force to shut me up, oh yeah, you can't

hahahaha


*hopes that my friend who thinks he is a Jedi doesn't read this*

*appologizes to any Jedi that really can use the force, don't hurt me*

Jedi is just as legitimate as any other religion.

Anyone could be a spy for the Amish, especially Keruvalia!

Awww damnit! The Elders are not going to be happy now .... back to the acid mines with me.

A HERITIC!!!!!!!!!!! Bring out the Holy Pot of Boiling Dihydrogen Oxide!!!!!!

Simply giving the heretic a steam bath will do no good. We must reeducate him, so he learns the error of his ways and is brought into the light so he may be touched by His noodly apendage.

[don's pirate regalia]

May His most holyness, the Flying Spaghetti Monster, absolve you of your sins and bring you to the light. Your misled dedication to lasagna is a sin- raising a false idol. For while spaghetti is the first and most superior noodle, made in His great image, capable of being eaten alone, or with various sauces and meatballs- lasagna is bland and only capable of being eaten in a singular two-factioned style: meaty or vegetarian. It is therefore a corruption of His most holyness, the FSM, creator of the world, beginning with mountains, trees, and a midget.
Ramen

Jedi is just as legitimate as any other religion.
probably but if I was going to bash one, that's the one that is annoying me today. ;)

probably but if I was going to bash one, that's the one that is annoying me today. ;)

Actually it's about the only one I'd join. But only for the robes and lightsaber.

I might be wrong, but couldn't this be taking as flamming? or something like that?

Oh btw...If you all get away with this..Rest assured I will make a thread bashing your beliefs, and i will sink as low as all you are. I will make sure to make everything yiou have lived you life for is mocked and in vain. because that is what you are doing here to people of faith

http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=459343

oh there is my new thread...poopey heads :D

You know, in all my research, i've found that the religion with the least amount of logical contradictions to its own doctrine would appear to be worship of the Flying Spaghetti Monster. Also, the decorations and festivities seem to be pretty elegant and fanciful. And i don't feel like i've just sucked a syphilitic schlong after iterating prayers for it, like i do with any of those other major wastes-of-time, and my knees get less skinned up in the process.
However, as the flagellists were so keen, although their ideas were a bit off-the-mark, i'm not finding much persuasive literature against nun-spanking.

Oh btw...If you all get away with this..Rest assured I will make a thread bashing your beliefs, and i will sink as low as all you are. I will make sure to make everything yiou have lived you life for is mocked and in vain. because that is what you are doing here to people of faith
Why ... in ... the ... hades ... did ... you ... bother ... reading ... any ... posts ... on ... this ... thread ... then?

No, i'm not imitating Malcom's friend in the wheelchair. I was exercising out a cholesterol-induced stroke.
So, are you a glutton for punishment? Is there some kind of glory in getting into these kinds of tangles, some assumed victory?

I guess I'll bash the Flying Spaghetti Monster religion. Lasagna is a superior noodle.
Yes, but a noodle doth NOT a spaghetti make.
Granted, it takes more than noodles to make spaghetti OR lasagna, but, well, hold on ....

EDIT: ah yes, the function of the communions are different, as are the results.
Communion with the spaghetti monster is ... well, messy, as is w/lasagna (btw, wouldn't the common deific ancestor be that species the Horta from ST: TOS?)
*but*
w/spaghetti monster, you are filled quickly but also you quickly make room for nourishment.
w/lasagna, you get too full to be graceful, and end up farting your way out of company in most domestic situations. AND, your ticker takes a few hits.

THAT, and the aerodynamics of lasagna as compared to spaghetti are vastly different.

A HERITIC!!!!!!!!!!! Bring out the Holy Pot of Boiling Dihydrogen Oxide!!!!!!
So, in your diocese, the conservatives haven't successfully banned it as part of an anti-intellectual, anti-PC legislation?
Good! Now's the time to gerrymander and secure the future of the faithful!!

Simply giving the heretic a steam bath will do no good. We must reeducate him, so he learns the error of his ways and is brought into the light so he may be touched by His noodly apendage.

[don's pirate regalia]

May His most holyness, the Flying Spaghetti Monster, absolve you of your sins and bring you to the light. Your misled dedication to lasagna is a sin- raising a false idol. For while spaghetti is the first and most superior noodle, made in His great image, capable of being eaten alone, or with various sauces and meatballs- lasagna is bland and only capable of being eaten in a singular two-factioned style: meaty or vegetarian. It is therefore a corruption of His most holyness, the FSM, creator of the world, beginning with mountains, trees, and a midget.
Ramen

Yes, YES, RAMEN TO THAT!!!
Can i get a witness? CAN I GET A WITNESS?
Can i get parlay??

Well, being an apathetic agnostic, i simply dont care.
You mean, of course, that you're undecided about not caring.

As opposed to those other, faithless religions? :p
Well, in attention to cadence, you should ask,
as opposed to those other, faithless-based religions? :P

Ah, quaint but poignant.

*sobs*
i told myself i wouldn't ... not again ... *sob*

"Religion of peace" my ass.


That is all.

Hey, this thread is just as stupid as the other one out there!

I guess I do get one rant in though: socialism and its big brother of communism are some of the most infectious, self-destructive philosophies alive this day. They remind me of medieval Catholicism.

Hey, this thread is just as stupid as the other one out there!
:eek: :eek: :eek:

gasp

I guess I do get one rant in though: socialism and its big brother of communism are some of the most infectious, self-destructive philosophies alive this day. They remind me of medieval Catholicism.
Be still, my heart!

Stupid Atheism.

Darn baby eating atheists.

I hate atheism.