NationStates Jolt Archive

I figured a Monday would be the best day for this poll...

We all have days where we just want people to leave us the hell alone. Well, what's the best way to get them to bugger off?

Don't wear pants. And twitch a lot.

wave a machinegun around? no, that will just make them drop to the floor and yell... or if you're in the states... shoot you in the forehead... I'll go for saying: "Hello, I come from the holy church of the Moon Dolphin, would you be interested in some Anal Shakra Healing?"

That gets most people running...

I figured a Monday would be the best day for this poll...

We all have days where we just want people to leave us the hell alone. Well, what's the best way to get them to bugger off?It really depends on whom you're trying to get rid of. I know from personal experience that "No money..." deters prostitutes, "No computer..." deters people trying to sell you an internet connection, and I've heard "Shalom!" works best against Jehova's witnesses...

Obscene gestures. Obscene is always good :D

Painting a red pentagram also works wonders at repelling Jehovah's Witnesses, or so I've heard :D Answering the door naked also does the trick.

direct approach works best... just tell em to fuck off.
i am well versed in this :)

A vote for me is a vote for antisocialism!

Painting a red pentagram also works wonders at repelling Jehovah's Witnesses, or so I've heard :D Answering the door naked also does the trick.

Answering the door naked with a prostitute at your side works even better. ;)

Answering the door naked with a prostitute at your side works even better. ;)

Rofl

Painting a red pentagram also works wonders at repelling Jehovah's Witnesses, or so I've heard :D Answering the door naked also does the trick.

*giggle* I might just try that. Last time I got them to go away by telling them that they'd never get anywhere with me and they were going to hell. Heh. But that took too long, and I might just try the naked thing. Do you think just lacy underwear would work or does it have to be fully naked?

*giggle* I might just try that. Last time I got them to go away by telling them that they'd never get anywhere with me and they were going to hell. Heh. But that took too long, and I might just try the naked thing. Do you think just lacy underwear would work or does it have to be fully naked?

Lacy underwear might work.

Answering the door naked with a prostitute at your side works even better. ;)
I think I might have to come in for a little visit if you plan on doing that.
And Fass is currently winning, Phantasmagoric.

I think I might have to come in for a little visit if you plan on doing that.
And Fass is currently winning, Phantasmagoric.

Nah...nobody wants to see me naked. Nobody.

All of the above?

It was a tough call between spitting and Fass, but alas....I think that Fass could repel more people, and faster, than I could alone if I spit on them.

We must all have fun-size Fasses forthwith.

attempt to evangelize them?

Nah...nobody wants to see me naked. Nobody.

You spoke too soon.

Nah...nobody wants to see me naked. Nobody.

I do, and I'm only a stone's throw away from you right now.

Y'all say that, but I've never posted my pic here. For all you know, I could be an 86-year-old hermaphrodite with a hunchback. ;)

Y'all say that, but I've never posted my pic here. For all you know, I could be an 86-year-old hermaphrodite with a hunchback. ;)

That doesn't change my mind.

That doesn't change my mind.

Um....ooooooooookaaaaaaaaay...

Y'all say that, but I've never posted my pic here. For all you know, I could be an 86-year-old hermaphrodite with a hunchback. ;)
If anything, I'd say I'd want to see you naked even moreso after hearing that.

Not out of attraction, though....just curiosity.

Y'all say that, but I've never posted my pic here. For all you know, I could be an 86-year-old hermaphrodite with a hunchback. ;)

Now you have to post! Can't leave me hanging.

Simonist']If anything, I'd say I'd want to see you naked even moreso after hearing that.

Not out of attraction, though....just curiosity.

Sure, just out of curiosity... ;)

Now you have to post! Can't leave me hanging.

As if you're hanging... :p

As if you're hanging... :p

Well, I've something hanging on something. Let not my faps be in vain.

Sure, just out of curiosity... ;)
Of course. Attraction is straight out. I've not seen your picture, I've not heard your voice, and you apparently live in a broom closet at the UN building. You could be ugly, speak with a nasal tone, and clearly you're either creepy or poor....what qualities do you have that would attract me? :p

Well, I've something hanging on something. Let not my faps be in vain.

:eek:

Eat brains!

Brrrraaaaiiinzzzz....

Simonist']Of course. Attraction is straight out. I've not seen your picture, I've not heard your voice, and you apparently live in a broom closet at the UN building. You could be ugly, speak with a nasal tone, and clearly you're either creepy or poor....what qualities do you have that would attract me? :p

None. And I'm both creepy and poor. :p

Just jump on them and punch them.

Or confess your undying love to them.
Constantly.
Then follow them home.
They'll leave you alone forever after that.
Works best if it's a stranger...

Here is what you do. You strip down and run around naked screaming at the top of your voice, "Help! I'm a chicken! I'm a chicken and Colonel Sanders is coming to get me!"

I've actually convinced somebody to do that once...

:eek:

Chop, chop. I have a TG box.

Chop, chop. I have a TG box.

Hell, I could always PM you on IRC, too. :p

Hell, I could always PM you on IRC, too. :p

What are you waiting for then?

What are you waiting for then?

I like to tease. ;)

All of the above?Or multiple choice... I'll take one from column 'A' and two from column 'B,' please...

:D

I like to tease. ;)

Nobody likes one.

Aside from the items on the poll list, it never helps to constantly tell others how great your way of living is, and how everyone should live their life just like you, and how people who don't live exactly like you do are idiots.

Yes, everyone should be just crazy about the way that they personally live, but most other people don't want to be lectured on how that makes them wrong.

I'd say they'd all work... though some more effectively/quickly than others.

No surprise here. Fass is winning. :D

I usually dont have a problem with people bothering me in person. I dont seem to attract a lot of aggravation.

I usually dont have a problem with people bothering me in person. I dont seem to attract a lot of aggravation.

You create it instead? ;)

We all have days where we just want people to leave us the hell alone. Well, what's the best way to get them to bugger off?
What works for me is simply speaking my mind. :D

What works for me is simply speaking my mind. :D

Must be a short speech. :p

Must be a short speech. :p

Dang, you beat me to it.

Must be a short speech. :p
http://img516.imageshack.us/img516/699/smileytroutsmack8fh.gif (http://imageshack.us)

Dang, you beat me to it.
Amazing! Tsk! :D

http://img516.imageshack.us/img516/699/smileytroutsmack8fh.gif[

Get a new smilie. (http://www.spacespider.net/free-animated-smileys.php
)

http://img516.imageshack.us/img516/699/smileytroutsmack8fh.gif (http://imageshack.us)

Harder! HARDER!

You create it instead? ;)

I dont think so. If something doesnt annoy me, I'm very accepting and easy to get along with.

B.O.

now there's the real thing, everyone knows someone who has it... but you can fake it by not showering or wearing deodorant for a few days. hehe

Dang, you beat me to it.

I'm quick like that. ;)

Many of these choices are more likely to evoke violence or even sympathy from many people. You'll probably end up both seriously injured and pity-****ed.

Simonist']Of course. Attraction is straight out. I've not seen your picture, I've not heard your voice, and you apparently live in a broom closet at the UN building. You could be ugly, speak with a nasal tone, and clearly you're either creepy or poor....what qualities do you have that would attract me? :p
I think he is the UN Building equivalent to the Phantom of the Opera, and not the foppish, sissy movie version, but Leroux's deformed (yet oddly well-travelled) psychopath who was planning to blow up the city of Paris and had a room exclusively for the purpose of baking people alive.

I think he is the UN Building equivalent to the Phantom of the Opera, and not the foppish, sissy movie version, but Leroux's deformed (yet oddly well-travelled) psychopath who was planning to blow up the city of Paris and had a room exclusively for the purpose of baking people alive.

You weren't supposed to tell!

A vote for me is a vote for antisocialism!
When did you start hating socialism Fass? :p

You weren't supposed to tell!
At least I didn't tell them about that bureaucrat who you've been teaching to fill out forms and write speeches because you have developed an obsessive love for her and a need to control her every move.
Oops.
Well, if they don't know that her name is Elizabeth they'll never be able to track her down and warn her about your plans to abduct her on Christmas Eve and forever carry her down to the underworld with you.
Shit, again.

Damnation! You're going to ruin everything!

Although her name's not Elizabeth...

>.>
<.<

When did you start hating socialism Fass? :p
Fass hates everything, it comes with the uniform when one becomes a gay Swede in medical school.

I went for BO, just because there's nothing they can do about it! You just sit there, stinking to high heaven, and they can't exactly say 'I'm sorry but I couldn't help noticing that you fucking stink' can they? They just sit there trying not to breathe and... so forth. It's bad needless to say - as you may have guessed I've been on the receiving end of it several times. It's bad.

I went for BO, just because there's nothing they can do about it! You just sit there, stinking to high heaven, and they can't exactly say 'I'm sorry but I couldn't help noticing that you fucking stink' can they? They just sit there trying not to breathe and... so forth. It's bad needless to say - as you may have guessed I've been on the receiving end of it several times. It's bad.

If it's happened to you so frequently, have you ever considered that you may actually be smelling yourself? :p

Tough choice between ignoring them and Fass. I picked ignoring them but am having second thoughts. :D

I went for BO, just because there's nothing they can do about it! You just sit there, stinking to high heaven, and they can't exactly say 'I'm sorry but I couldn't help noticing that you fucking stink' can they? They just sit there trying not to breathe and... so forth. It's bad needless to say - as you may have guessed I've been on the receiving end of it several times. It's bad.
Carry a can of Lysol with you and, every few minutes, give them a spritz. Eventually they'll either get the point or smell like Spring Meadows After the Rain.

Carry a can of Lysol with you and, every few minutes, give them a spritz. Eventually they'll either get the point or smell like Spring Meadows After the Rain.

I prefer Lavender Meadow myself. In fact, I use it as cologne.

I have several tried and true tactics for repelling people.

Jehovah's Witnesses? Yes. I can confirm that answering the door nake does indeed work. Especially if you look crestfallen and say, "You're not the zookeeper!"

People in general? Wear a jockstrap on your head. The more worn and fragrant, the better. But usually any will do. People give you a wide berth when the see you walking down the street with a jockstrap on your head.

A straitjacket will accomplish the same thing, but it makes reaching into your pockets or driving a car a bit of a challenge.

Never underestimate the value of gnawing on a dead rat.

:D

Never underestimate the value of gnawing on a dead rat.

:D

I think I just threw up in my mouth.

And Fass still leads in the voting (though only by the slimmest of margins).

I prefer more passive aggressive options:

Giggle at everything.
Drool.
Sneeze and cough without covering your mouth.
Fart and burp loudly.
"Accidentally" spit when you talk.
Bite your fingernails and "accidentally" spit when you talk.
Pinch (both sets of) their cheeks.
Turn everything they say into a sexual comment.
Say "are you hitting on me?" after everything they say.
Pick your nose and wipe it on yourself.
Say "I love men in blue" (Or women in red, depending on their gender and the color they're wearing.)

A portable Fass would do the trick for anybody.

:D