NationStates Jolt Archive

Cuz i hear if you're a good Morman guy, when you die you get to be the God of your own planet. That would seriously kick ass, what other religion will give you a whole friggin planet as a reward for being a member. Beats the heck out of those umpteen virgins Muslim suicide bombers get... you get a whole friggin planet full of virgins and prostitutes and farm animals whatever your newly diefied heart desires.

Well you certainly got the selfless part of religon down.

wow you must really be into delayed gratification

wow you must really be into delayed gratification

yeah but its a whole friggin planet... no boring singing with the heavenly chorus... no waiting for ragnarok at the all father's table... no cheesy virgins of limited number... no endless cycle of rebirth... just a whole planet to rule however you want... its the best insentive package i've seen yet. how are they gonna top that? give away two planets with each new membership?

Well you certainly got the selfless part of religon down.
what selfless part, its all about the presents at the end... or in the end.

yeah but its a whole friggin planet... no boring singing with the heavenly chorus... no waiting for ragnarok at the all father's table... no cheesy virgins of limited number... no endless cycle of rebirth... just a whole planet to rule however you want... its the best insentive package i've seen yet. how are they gonna top that? give away two planets with each new membership?
*shakes head*

*shakes head*


but dude(or dudette) they're giving out planets, does your faith give out planets?

on the down side - no coffee, no boozahol, a creepy network of chruch-goers checking up on you to make sure you stay on the straight and mormon, and you have to believe false things that are frankly ridiculous and do so with a straight face.

and they don't even allow polygamy anymore.

on the down side - no coffee, no boozahol, a creepy network of chruch-goers checking up on you to make sure you stay on the straight and mormon, and you have to believe false things that are frankly ridiculous and do so with a straight face.

and they don't even allow polygamy anymore.

well the splinter groups do, but you have to wonder if a bunch of 7 guys their 26 wives and 117 children really can promise planets with the authority of a church of several million.

but dude(or dudette) they're giving out planets, does your faith give out planets?
I'm atheist, so I guess no... I'm also Catholic, so I guess no... I'm also God, so I guess yes...

My religion gives out planets... If you are a good christian and you assend to the hevens Jesus meets you and ....

O hell what am i say

Sign me up for that planet!

I'm atheist, so I guess no... I'm also Catholic, so I guess no... I'm also God, so I guess yes...
well then you've already got your own planet... stop trying to ruin it for the rest of us.

on the down side - no coffee, no boozahol, a creepy network of chruch-goers checking up on you to make sure you stay on the straight and mormon, and you have to believe false things that are frankly ridiculous and do so with a straight face.

and they don't even allow polygamy anymore.

you forgot the funny underwear

Also the multiple wives in this life. If i was to remain catholic all i'd get is a preist in a dark sweaty room.

Where the hell can i sign up 4 this "Moromism" deal

well then you've already got your own planet... stop trying to ruin it for the rest of us.
Oh, and I hate Mormons, pigeons and religous right wing

you forgot the funny underwear

what can i say, you can't include everything wrong with mormons in a single post

Great... Can i have your planet?

Also the multiple wives in this life. If i was to remain catholic all i'd get is a preist in a dark sweaty room.

Where the hell can i sign up 4 this "Moromism" deal
do and I'll smight your heathen ass...

My religion gives out planets... If you are a good christian and you assend to the hevens Jesus meets you and ....

O hell what am i say

Sign me up for that planet!

ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahaha *gasp* ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahaha *gasp* ahahahahahahahahahaha *pants* that was great hahaha

what can i say, you can't include everything wrong with mormons in a single post

i wouldnt call them "wrong" so much as "stuff you really should know about before you sign up."

you forgot the funny underwear
that's magic super underwear... like the body armour of god... like a superhero costume you wear under those bad missionary suits or just your regular clothes... man mormons give out all the cool stuff... no two wives in one bed though even in the splinter groups... but that'll be fixed once i get a planet

Cuz i hear if you're a good Morman guy, when you die you get to be the God of your own planet. That would seriously kick ass, what other religion will give you a whole friggin planet as a reward for being a member. Beats the heck out of those umpteen virgins Muslim suicide bombers get... you get a whole friggin planet full of virgins and prostitutes and farm animals whatever your newly diefied heart desires.

I think your going have trouble acomplishing the "good Morman guy" part.

So if I promise you an entire galaxy will you send me all your earthly possesions? Hey, I'm just asking everything you own for an entire galaxy. Can't beat that deal.

Cuz i hear if you're a good Morman guy, when you die you get to be the God of your own planet. That would seriously kick ass, what other religion will give you a whole friggin planet as a reward for being a member. Beats the heck out of those umpteen virgins Muslim suicide bombers get... you get a whole friggin planet full of virgins and prostitutes and farm animals whatever your newly diefied heart desires.
Yes too bad Mormonism is false.

i wouldnt call them "wrong" so much as "stuff you really should know about before you sign up."

i think i'll stick with wrong.

at least most religions have the decency to be wrong about stuff that happened a really long time ago or isn't easily checked.

thats disturbing.... even worse, my birthday is the same as the guy that founded the mormon religion x.x hello everyone btw, i'm new

that's magic super underwear... like the body armour of god... like a superhero costume you wear under those bad missionary suits or just your regular clothes... man mormons give out all the cool stuff... no two wives in one bed though even in the splinter groups... but that'll be fixed once i get a planet
hmmmm do you get to set your own morality in your own universe?

how bout making a nicer quality super magic underwear at least?

thats disturbing.... even worse, my birthday is the same as the guy that founded the mormon religion x.x hello everyone btw, i'm new
hi myrsky

so THIS is the thread you thought youd start with eh?

hmmmmmmm

What they fail to tell you is that your planet is some barren wasteland stinkhole on the other side of BF Universe where no one and nothing exists except the voices in your head which, by the way, are telling you to adopt a gerbil and name him Clyde the Great.

What they fail to tell you is that your planet is some barren wasteland stinkhole on the other side of BF Universe where no one and nothing exists except the voices in your head which, by the way, are telling you to adopt a gerbil and name him Clyde the Great.

Yeah I mean, if our own solar system is anything to judge by, most of the planets out there aren't worth ruling over.