NationStates Jolt Archive

Always the Christmas lover, I've got a great idea to distract us from the latest Bush blunder. A Christmas Card Contest. Everyone who's interested can post a copy of their work. The winning, as selected by me, card I will have printed by MBE, I'll sign it and mail it to you. You can cherish that for the rest of your life.

Conditions:


Artwork must be an original work
Artwork cannot be overtly racial offencive
Artwork cannot be sexually explicit
Artwork must comply with NS and Jolt standards
There is not limit to the amount of submissions from any one poster
Artwork will be judged by me
Artwork remains the property of the original poster, the poster concents to me printing the work

Come on people, Rotovia wants himself some X-mas card related fun!

# Artwork must be an original work
# Artwork cannot be overtly racial offencive
# Artwork cannot be sexually explicit
# Artwork must comply with NS and Jolt standards
This is why your thread is empty, dude. ;)

This is why your thread is empty, dude. ;)
lol, so true.

i would make a card but all of my art stuff is at school so it will have to wait untill tomarrrow

i would make a card but all of my art stuff is at school so it will have to wait untill tomarrrow
Good-o

Artwork cannot be overtly racial offencive
Artwork cannot be sexually explicit
How the Hell do you expect me to work under such constraints? Would you have told William Shakespeare to avoid the Olde English? Would you have told Samuel Taylor Coleridge to write without the aid of Opium? Would you have told Stanley Kubrick that the Clockwork Orange was too violent? Would you have told deSade that he should be less graphic?
The Artist must be free of all constraint to properly produce schlock of no value beyond the ability to shock puritan audiences!

Artwork will be judged by me
Don't you ever presume to judge me, mortal insect! Many men greater then you have gone to their graves for such an affront.

How the Hell do you expect me to work under such constraints? Would you have told William Shakespeare to avoid the Olde English? Would you have told Samuel Taylor Coleridge to write without the aid of Opium? Would you have told Stanley Kubrick that the Clockwork Orange was too violent? Would you have told deSade that he should be less graphic?
The Artist must be free of all constraint to properly produce schlock of no value beyond the ability to shock puritan audiences!
It's actually a "protect me from the wrath of the Mods" thing more then anything else


Don't you ever presume to judge me, mortal insect! Many men greater then you have gone to their graves for such an affrontI'll judge whoever I want, bitch!

Don't you ever presume to judge me, mortal insect! Many men greater then you have gone to their graves for such an affront.

How dare you blaspheme the lord Rotovia?! He shall smite thee for this affront! :D

I would make a card, but I'm far too lazy.

How dare you blaspheme the lord Rotovia?! He shall smite thee for this affront! :D

I would make a card, but I'm far too lazy.
Bah. Fiddle couldn't smite a cold, with a cold-smiting-machine!

Bah. Fiddle couldn't smite a cold, with a cold-smiting-machine!
Don't make fun, the common cold is a bitch to get rid of. People are easier, and gods are the easiest things to take down since sliced bread.
It's actually a "protect me from the wrath of the Mods" thing more then anything else
Yeah, I suppose that my idea for a card would make the mods a bit pissy, but maybe I'll do it anyway. You've got three strikes before your out, after all.
I'll judge whoever I want, bitch!
I'll have you overturned in Superior Interweb Court!

Don't make fun, the common cold is a bitch to get rid of. People are easier, and gods are the easiest things to take down since sliced bread.Personally I find a pitcher of cyanide dissolved in arsenic works just fine.


Yeah, I suppose that my idea for a card would make the mods a bit pissy, but maybe I'll do it anyway. You've got three strikes before your out, after all.If that were true, I'd still be Rotovia...

I'll have you overturned in Superior Interweb Court! Like to see you try. I sit on the Interweb Court of Appeals/1337 |-|a><0r5 and have no issue with abusing my power...

Like to see you try. I sit on the Interweb Court of Appeals/1337 |-|a><0r5 and have no issue with abusing my power...
Well if the courts won't hear our (We have no idea when we started using the royal We, just roll with it) case, then we'll take it to the streets! The MAN won't keep us down!
If that were true, I'd still be Rotovia...
I was refering to the fact that you can be deated twice before you get slapped with a DOS or IP ban.
Personally I find a pitcher of cyanide dissolved in arsenic works just fine.
For people, gods, or colds? Years of experience with Christionas has taught me that all it would take to kill God is a few openly gay priests getting married while they read amateurish fiction about a British wizard at a boarding school filled with equal parts sad-sacks and one-dimensional bullies.

Note: I am responding in the reverse order to what you posted. I started doing that in the previous post and shall continue to do so because I can, and there is not one damn thing you can do about it.

Here's what I came up with in 15 minutes of MSPaint fun...

:D

http://i35.photobucket.com/albums/d197/amerigo/xmas.gif

I was refering to the fact that you can be deated twice before you get slapped with a DOS or IP ban.
Unless you over power the Mods and steal Jolt...

For people, gods, or colds? All of the above

Well if the courts won't hear our (We have no idea when we started using the royal We, just roll with it) case, then we'll take it to the streets! The MAN won't keep us down!Yes I will

Years of experience with Christionas has taught me that all it would take to kill God is a few openly gay priests getting married while they read amateurish fiction about a British wizard at a boarding school filled with equal parts sad-sacks and one-dimensional bullies.Seems a little messy...

Note: I am responding in the reverse order to what you posted. I started doing that in the previous post and shall continue to do so because I can, and there is not one damn thing you can do about it. Note: I just messed with your precious order!

Here's what I came up with in 15 minutes of MSPaint fun...

:D

http://i35.photobucket.com/albums/d197/amerigo/xmas.gif
I'll never look at Santa the same way, again

I'll never look at Santa the same way, again
You have that privildge... he can't. Lost his eyes back in the war... where he was abandoned for dead... and now he's back... back for REVENGE. Coming this Christmas...

"Just Another X in X-Mas"

(Santa's Back)

EDIT: Also since no one submitted anything does that mean I'm winning?! :D

Also since no one submitted anything does that mean I'm winning?! :D
Yes, but it also means that you are coming in dead last, as well.

Yes, but it also means that you are coming in dead last, as well.
They said he was dead... they said he was the last of the Northpolians... Now the man who they called dead last... is back... back for REVENGE.

"Just Another X in X-Mas"

(Santa's Back)

They said he was dead... they said he was the last of the Northpolians... Now the man who they called dead last... is back... back for REVENGE.

"Just Another X in X-Mas"

(Santa's Back)
Too far

Too far
Yeah I figured, but I couldn't resist.

NOTE: I just reversed the order even more, and you can still do naught but moan and gnash your teeth in the face of my 1337 Cut and Paste skillz.
Note: I just messed with your precious order!
Well, when exterminating the Divine it is always best to make as big a go of it as possible. Still, its nowhere near as messy as the consumation.
Seems a little messy...
Oh, ok.
Wait, I'm being needlessly defiant here so . . .
*Sets fire to his own apartment and breaks a store window*
YOU CAN'T FIGHT THE POWER OF THE STREET PEOPLE WHO ARE ON THE STREET AND FIGHTING YOU! ALSO, THIS SLOGAN REALLY SUCKS AS A CHANT!
Yes I will
But what if a God Made Flesh who has a cold takes it? Which parts get killed off first?
All of the above
I would, but the last time I stole a part of the Interweb I got Cancerous AIDS of the Face Spungiform Disease.
Unless you over power the Mods and steal Jolt...

Thanks a lot for this thread... now I can't stop MSPainting... I already made a horrible thread that shouldn't have ever been made... I hate you MSPaint! But I need you even more!!! :headbang:

Thanks a lot for this thread... now I can't stop MSPainting... I already made a horrible thread that shouldn't have ever been made... I hate you MSPaint! But I need you even more!!! :headbang:
Step 1: Pick up an absurdly large hammer
Step 2: Smash Computer Monitor and Mouse
Step 3: Bake a Cake
Step 4: Ship said cake and a check for $10,000 dollars to me.
Step 5: Go to Sleep
Step 6: Feel better the next morning

Step 1: Pick up an absurdly large hammer
Step 2: Smash Computer Monitor and Mouse
Step 3: Bake a Cake
Step 4: Ship said cake and a check for $10,000 dollars to me.
Step 5: Go to Sleep
Step 6: Feel better the next morning
I'll need your address for that step 4 here... Heh... heheh... hehehehheheh...

Oh and on a completely unrelated note: At what times is there usually no one home at your home?

I'll need your address for that step 4 here... Heh... heheh... hehehehheheh...

Oh and on a completely unrelated note: At what times is there usually no one home at your home?
Step 7: Try to rob my house, and I will not be responsible for any electrocution, dismemberment, catching of deadly diseases, irritable bowel syndrome, gross disfigurement, or constant itching and scratching that may result from encoutering my traps/pets.

Step 7: Try to rob my house, and I will not be responsible for any electrocution, dismemberment, catching of deadly diseases, irritable bowel syndrome, gross disfigurement, or constant itching and scratching that may result from encoutering my traps/pets.
Uh... beer?...

Uh... beer?...
I'm not quite sure what the question was, but I am almost certain that you just answered it with full and dead-on accuracy. Have a cookie.

Woah, woah, woah.

No one has since submitted an entry to this thread. Does that mean I win by default?

If so, I expect to get my X-mas card in the mail this christmas, with Rotovia's signature and best wishes.

My entry:

http://homepage.ntlworld.com/david.cobbe/card2.gif

My entry:
Mm, yes. Commoners are quite amusing during any season.
Look at him sitting in the snow, he thinks that someone will give him money! How quaint.

Step 7: Try to rob my house, and I will not be responsible for any electrocution, dismemberment, catching of deadly diseases, irritable bowel syndrome, gross disfigurement, or constant itching and scratching that may result from encoutering my traps/pets.

You forgot...*shifty eyes*...castration...with a rusty cheesegrater.