NationStates Jolt Archive

On the weekend me and couple friends planned a private little get together of old school friends and just sent out some mass TXTs to people on our Mobiles(cells).

Unfortunately somehow word got out to about 200 teeny boppers and their un-decended testical boyfriends.

So there we are having a casual BBQ and suddenly engulfed by hundreds of teens who within minutes have taken over.

This goes on for a few hours until I catch a dozen or so of the little bitches smoking pot in the backyard.

"What the fuck do you little bitches think you're doing" Said Rotovia whilst waving a bottle of Smirnoff Ice in a threatening manner

"It's not ours!" Said the stupid teenage wanker

"Then who's the fuck is it! Get that shit out of here!" Replied Rotovia skulling Smirnoff and attracting more attention then there ever should be from your prude neighbours

"We found it in the box by the TV" Were the last words of the little arsehats

I mean "wtf, mate?!". That shits expensive.

I had a point here somewhere...

"What the fuck do you little bitches think you're doing" Said Rotovia whilst waving a bottle of Smirnoff Ice in a threatening manner.

Smirnoff Ice? Wtf, are you like a 16 year old girl yourself or something?

you need to find a better hiding place...

Smirnoff Ice? Wtf, are you like a 16 year old girl yourself or something?
I probally neglected to mention this. But I decided I would enact karma myself. Since my entire carton of twelve bottles from The Wine Society went missing I stole back drinks form any teenagers who looked remotely guilty...

I would presume that I did take it from a 16 year old girl...

iam not laughing with you i am laughing at you:)

Smirnoff Ice? Wtf, are you like a 16 year old girl yourself or something?

LMAO

you need to find a better hiding place...

Really. A box by the tv. You might as well have put, "Here's the pot!!!" in big red letters on the box. Or a neon sign with a flashing arrow.

you need to find a better hiding place...
True. I was thinking of a surfboard. But that didn't work to well for Schapell Corby (http://www.google.com.au/search?hl=en&safe=off&q=Schappel+Corby&spell=1)

Smirnoff Ice? Wtf, are you like a 16 year old girl yourself or something?
He was confiscating stuff like any good Catholic Jew would do.
*shifty eyes*

I probally neglected to mention this. But I decided I would enact karma myself. Since my entire carton of twelve bottles from The Wine Society went missing I stole back drinks form any teenagers who looked remotely guilty...

I would presume that I did take it from a 16 year old girl...

Oooh, bum save, old chap. On a scale from one to Nintendo, I give it an incredulous Power Glove and laugh at your wimpish drinking habits.

Really. A box by the tv. You might as well have put, "Here's the pot!!!" in big red letters on the box. Or a neon sign with a flashing arrow.
I'm sorry. I work under the assumption my house won't be swamped by loser teenage punks... or police...

True. I was thinking of a surfboard. But that didn't work to well for Schapell Corby (http://www.google.com.au/search?hl=en&safe=off&q=Schappel+Corby&spell=1)
ROFLMAO.

True. I was thinking of a surfboard. But that didn't work to well for Schapell Corby (http://www.google.com.au/search?hl=en&safe=off&q=Schappel+Corby&spell=1)

Lock box?

I'm sorry. I work under the assumption my house won't be swamped by loser teenage punks... or police...

Shows what you know.:p

Oooh, bum save, old chap. On a scale from one to Nintendo, I give it an incredulous Power Glove and laugh at your wimpish drinking habits.
Meh. I can't say no to sexy girly who phones from The Wine Society each month... She's evil I tells ya!

Oooh, bum save, old chap. On a scale from one to Nintendo, I give it an incredulous Power Glove and laugh at your wimpish drinking habits.
DEKE's Twice and Shoots.....

SCORES.
FASS 1 ROTOVIA 0

ROFLMAO.
Thank god. I was worried that joke would be lost :)

Lock box?
How am I supposed to open that when I'm drunk and in need of our good friend Mary Jane?

Thank god. I was worried that joke would be lost :)
Australians.:p
it is a bit like with the Air Hostess that was reported missing and then found in an Immigrant detention centre.-Me and Preebles had ever so much func over that.

Meh. I can't say no to sexy girly who phones from The Wine Society each month... She's evil I tells ya!

Ask her to get you Bacardi Breezers while you're at it.

*snicker*

Ask her to get you Bacardi Breezers while you're at it.
Fass, I don't know what kind of cheap ass Wine Society's they have in Sweden... but no!


Sidebar: Why are there are Midori Illusions in the fridge right now... It's getting a little scary...

Ask her to get you Bacardi Breezers while you're at it.
Change of Line Rotovia caught short on the D Fass passes to Fass Slap Shot GOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAL

FASS 2 ROTOVIA 0

How am I supposed to open that when I'm drunk and in need of our good friend Mary Jane?

Hmm how do you open a lock box when your drunk. Okay now stay with me on this one because its going to be really complicated. First you find the key to the lock box which in most cases is probably good to put on your car key ring. Second there is a little hole in the box where said key fits in. Now this part is really going to blow your mind. You put the key in the hole and turn it. Its awsome isn't it. That opens the box and there is your pot nicely preserved and kept away from other people.

Australians.:p
it is a bit like with the Air Hostess that was reported missing and then found in an Immigrant detention centre.-Me and Preebles had ever so much func over that.
I like the fact we live a country where the government isn't at all that suprised that at least four Australian Citizens have been deported...

Fass, I don't know what kind of cheap ass Wine Society's they have in Sweden... but no!


Sidebar: Why are there are Midori Illusions in the fridge right now... It's getting a little scary...
Fass penalised for High Sticking 2 minutes in the box.

ROTOVIA POWER PLAY

LAZER BEAM GOAL!

FASS 2 ROTOVIA 1

Hmm how do you open a lock box when your drunk. Okay now stay with me on this one because its going to be really complicated. First you find the key to the lock box which in most cases is probably good to put on your car key ring. Second there is a little hole in the box where said key fits in. Now this part is really going to blow your mind. You put the key in the hole and turn it. Its awsome isn't it. That opens the box and there is your pot nicely preserved and kept away from other people.
I've never seen this lockbox or key before in my life! I swear to god...

Hmm how do you open a lock box when your drunk. Okay now stay with me on this one because its going to be really complicated. First you find the key to the lock box which in most cases is probably good to put on your car key ring. Second there is a little hole in the box where said key fits in. Now this part is really going to blow your mind. You put the key in the hole and turn it. Its awsome isn't it. That opens the box and there is your pot nicely preserved and kept away from other people.

:D the key word is drunk. many people cant even take a sh!t while drunk...

:D the key word is drunk. many people cant even take a sh!t while drunk...

Well those people are feather weights who need to toughen up.

Well those people are feather weights who need to toughen up.
If you can still see, you're not drunk

I like the fact where the government isn't all that suprised that at least four Australian Citizens have been deported...
Well i guess for every Australian deported it improves Australia.......
*except when they end up here*

Fass, I don't know what kind of cheap ass Wine Society's they have in Sweden... but no!

We have Vodka societies here. I mean, wine? That's what you drink during dinner with your fish or veal or whatever.

Well i guess for every Australian deported it improves Australia.......
*except when they end up here*
Harlesburg: 1
Australia: 0

We have Vodka societies here. I mean, wine? That's what you drink during dinner.
Perhaps the kind of dinner I was planning, prior to the invasion of teens from hell?

Wait... Vodka Society's you say...

*opinion of Sweden raises four points*

This is what you do. You take the pot, wrap it in a plastic bag and stick it up your bum for a few hours. When somebody goes to try and smoke it they'll realize, "Hey this grass smells like ass!" That way nobody will want to smoke it except you and possibly not even you... wait that's a waste. Nevermind.

This is clear evidence of why you need to hire Fiddlebottoms Home Defence Industries. By using our patented technique of filling your yard with Bouncing Betty Landmines you would be forever rid of troublesome kids getting on your lawn and stealing your precious drug supply.
Also good for keeping out the neighbour's dogs and adding that extra Halloween surprise that makes your house everyone's favorite!

This is clear evidence of why you need to hire Fiddlebottoms Home Defence Industries. By using our patented technique of filling your yard with Bouncing Betty Landmines you would be forever rid of troublesome kids getting on your lawn and stealing your precious drug supply.
Also good for keeping out the neighbour's dogs and adding that extra Halloween surprise that makes your house everyone's favorite!
What if I wanted to go into my yard to.... or.... maybe... ok

If you can still see, you're not drunk

That depends really. I've seen instances of people not being able to see well enough to realize they are making out with a fugly girl. I'd say they were drunk.

This is what you do. You take the pot, wrap it in a plastic bag and stick it up your bum for a few hours. When somebody goes to try and smoke it they'll realize, "Hey this grass smells like ass!" That way nobody will want to smoke it except you and possibly not even you... wait that's a waste. Nevermind.

Oh, please, d'you know how much pot I'd've left unsmoked if a little thing like that bothered me? It ain't good shit unless it smells like it, if you ask me.

This is clear evidence of why you need to hire Fiddlebottoms Home Defence Industries. By using our patented technique of filling your yard with Bouncing Betty Landmines you would be forever rid of troublesome kids getting on your lawn and stealing your precious drug supply.
Also good for keeping out the neighbour's dogs and adding that extra Halloween surprise that makes your house everyone's favorite!

so what do you do when you need to cut the grass??

so what do you do when you need to cut the grass??

Hire illegal immigrants to do your landscaping for you.

Hire illegal immigrants to do your landscaping for you.

That would be different from what everyone already does in what sense?

Hire illegal immigrants to do your landscaping for you.

oh yeah, of course :D

That would be different from what everyone already does in what sense?

It would be different in the sense that I would A. not get blown up and B. not be legally held responsible for what happens to the immigrants. Otherwise its the same.

That would be different from what everyone already does in what sense?
Because the landmines mean that you get a fireworks show while you sip brandy and watch the commoners scurry about the yard servicing your plants.

Because the landmines mean that you get a fireworks show while you sip brandy and watch the commoners scurry about the yard servicing your plants.

Or that. Though I prefer scotch instead of Brandy. And also I like to have ride of the valkrines by Wagner playing. It makes the atmosphere so much more enjoyable.

may I suggest the following for all your legal stashing needs:
http://www.oldglory.com/lp/category/~tcategory_id=OG_TYPE_1900/~category_id=HBK_809

And also I like to have ride of the valkrines by Wagner playing. It makes the atmosphere so much more enjoyable.
Mmm, quite.

may I suggest the following for all your legal stashing needs:
http://www.oldglory.com/lp/category/~tcategory_id=OG_TYPE_1900/~category_id=HBK_809


sweet :D

may I suggest the following for all your legal stashing needs:
http://www.oldglory.com/lp/category/~tcategory_id=OG_TYPE_1900/~category_id=HBK_809
If only they had one of those spinning bookcases. I'd be set...

If only they had one of those spinning bookcases. I'd be set...

A "biblioteca?" That is so lesbian.

A "biblioteca?" That is so lesbian.
Isn't a Biblioteca just a library?

Isn't a Biblioteca just a library?
And it is a known fact that only lesbians can read books written in Spanish.

Isn't a Biblioteca just a library?

Not in English, and that's what they called them on "Ellen," proving their lesbian nature.

And it is a known fact that only lesbians can read books written in Spanish.
That's true, I can't argue with that...

Not in English, and that's what they called them on "Ellen," proving their lesbian nature.
Wasn't Ellen cancelled around a thousand years ago?

Wasn't Ellen cancelled around a thousand years ago?

Your puny Earth years mean nothing in syndication hell.

S'lemme get this straight. The key to preventing strange teenagers from smoking your pot is found in Spanish lesbian literature?

Your puny Earth years mean nothing in syndication hell.
*shudder*

Though, admittedly, in small doses I do find her funny.

S'lemme get this straight. The key to preventing strange teenagers from smoking your pot is found in Spanish lesbian literature?
Don't question the logic of Fass!

S'lemme get this straight. The key to preventing strange teenagers from smoking your pot is found in Spanish lesbian literature?
Don't question the logic of Fass!

Don't question the logic of Fass!
Don't double post the logic of Fass!

Don't double post the logic of Fass!
I'll do as I please

So you've learned a valuble leason, for some reason one of those rotating bookcase dealies like in Abbot and Costello Meets a Monster movies has a lesbian conection of some kind, and as soon as the sketchy teenagers show up pocket your stash.

So you've learned a valuble leason, for some reason one of those rotating bookcase dealies like in Abbot and Costello Meets a Monster movies has a lesbian conection of some kind, and as soon as the sketchy teenagers show up pocket your stash.

I think that's the most salient point.

Am I the only one who didn't miss the part where Rotovia let his yard get invaded by tenny boppers, let a case of wine get stolen, and let his weed get smoked? PLEASE tell me you kicked SOMEBODIES ass!?

Am I the only one who didn't miss the part where Rotovia let his yard get invaded by tenny boppers, let a case of wine get stolen, and let his weed get smoked? PLEASE tell me you kicked SOMEBODIES ass!?

I think he was initially pleased cos he thought he could bag a root, but when they started drinking his booze & smoking his dope he realised too late that they were just pains in the arse.

Don't double post the logic of Fass!
Powerplay.
I'll do as I please
Stick save!

"oh look, here's somebody else's weed. let's smoke it"


thats not right man :(

"oh look, here's somebody else's weed. let's smoke it"


thats not right man :(
No there i a rule let strangers in your house expect them to trash the place.
He got off lightly.

No there i a rule let strangers in your house expect them to trash the place.
He got off lightly.
if they knew enough about weed to know what it was and how to roll some, they should have known better to steal from someone else's stash. full stop. its pot-etiquette. these little bastards probably didn't even pass to the left... and being pre-pubescent is no excuse damnit!

(though he probably did get off lightly in the grand scheme of things)

"oh look, here's somebody else's weed. let's smoke it"


thats not right man :(

Hahaha...

Reminds me of not a month ago when I went to a friends' shared house.

"Hey man, you got any weed?"
"Nope...but...uh...John might have some..."
"Ah, sweet!"
"Yeah, but we probably shouldn't...his mum just had a stroke, so he's in Sydney at the moment..."

*another friend is already searching*

And we found it underneath a loose board in the bottom of his closet and smoked it all. And it was good.

:D

Man, i'm a prick. Oh well, I paid for most of the booze that night, anyway, so my friend left some money for it.

Hahaha...

Reminds me of not a month ago when I went to a friends' shared house.

"Hey man, you got any weed?"
"Nope...but...uh...John might have some..."
"Ah, sweet!"
"Yeah, but we probably shouldn't...his mum just had a stroke, so he's in Sydney at the moment..."

*another friend is already searching*

And we found it underneath a loose board in the bottom of his closet and smoked it all. And it was good.

:D

Man, i'm a prick. Oh well, I paid for most of the booze that night, anyway, so my friend left some money for it.
you bastard :p

well if you knew the guy its ok i guess cos you can pay him back with some more green (right?). i mean i've been known to roll a few js for myself with my mate's stash after everyone else is asleep/passed out :P

not that you have to be a tightass with your weed or anything, i'm just trying to say taking it from someone you don't even know is kinda like... i dunno... as evil as hitler invading poland or something ;)

if they knew enough about weed to know what it was and how to roll some, they should have known better to steal from someone else's stash. full stop. its pot-etiquette. these little bastards probably didn't even pass to the left... and being pre-pubescent is no excuse damnit!

(though he probably did get off lightly in the grand scheme of things)
Pot ettiqette.:p

you bastard :p

well if you knew the guy its ok i guess cos you can pay him back with some more green (right?). i mean i've been known to roll a few js for myself with my mate's stash after everyone else is asleep/passed out :P

not that you have to be a tightass with your weed or anything, i'm just trying to say taking it from someone you don't even know is kinda like... i dunno... as evil as hitler invading poland or something ;)

Hahaha, I didn't actually know the guy, he was the housemate of a friend :p

Hahaha, I didn't actually know the guy, he was the housemate of a friend :p
damn yous! but you're ok... i like you and you're older than 12. so you won't get raped by woody harrleson ;)

you bastard :p

well if you knew the guy its ok i guess cos you can pay him back with some more green (right?). i mean i've been known to roll a few js for myself with my mate's stash after everyone else is asleep/passed out :P

not that you have to be a tightass with your weed or anything, i'm just trying to say taking it from someone you don't even know is kinda like... i dunno... as evil as hitler invading poland or something ;)
Godwin!!!!!!!!!!!!!1eleventyone!

damn yous! but you're ok... i like you and you're older than 12. so you won't get raped by woody harrleson ;)

Hahahahaha :p

Like i said, I paid for most of the booze, though, so my friend probably bought him some more. I dunno. I'll be scared shitless if next time I go there this guy is there and he's almost 7' and 100kg of muscle.

Oh, wait. He's a pothead. Not much chance of that. :D

Hey arnold smoked, and he´s buff

Hmm...


what part of that sentence had any connection with what I was actually going to say?


never mind

So you've learned a valuble leason, for some reason one of those rotating bookcase dealies like in Abbot and Costello Meets a Monster movies has a lesbian conection of some kind, and as soon as the sketchy teenagers show up pocket your stash.
What if the teenagers are lesbians literate in Spanish?

Am I the only one who didn't miss the part where Rotovia let his yard get invaded by tenny boppers, let a case of wine get stolen, and let his weed get smoked? PLEASE tell me you kicked SOMEBODIES ass!?
Damn straight...

Though, one of my less then intelligent friends suggested calling the cops. I could imagine that conversation:

Me: "Excuse me Officer, those teens stole my pot..."
000: "What's you address sir, so we can arrest yo...I mean the teens..."

What if the teenagers are lesbians literate in Spanish?
Congratulate your self on a good party.







And pocket your stash.



Incedently, it's 4:20 in California. I'll smoke a bowl of this nice NorCal green for y'all...

And it is a known fact that only lesbians can read books written in Spanish.

What do Spanish lesbians read ?

What do Spanish lesbians read ?Books about anarchy. I only knew two lesbians in Spain, but they didn't know each other and yet happened to be reading books on the same subject, at the same time. Coincidence? I think not.
They probably also read Spanish porn, just a guess.

Books about anarchy. I only knew two lesbians in Spain, but they didn't know each other and yet happened to be reading books on the same subject, at the same time. Coincidence? I think not.
They probably also read Spanish porn, just a guess.
I'm reading a book about Spanish anarchism, and its relationship to women. :D

I was going to say that they read Audre Lorde translated into Spanish...

And how does one read porn? :p

And how does one read porn? :pAll the magazines that I got had wee dirty stories, just like English-language porn often has... Sometimes, it was very confusing.

If only they had one of those spinning bookcases. I'd be set...
give me $50-75, and I'm sure I could rig something up in no time

give me $50-75, and I'm sure I could rig something up in no time
Or I could take that $75, mix it with another $75 and go buy some more pot...

Or I could take that $75, mix it with another $75 and go buy some more pot...
but...but...but then you won't have a cool spinny bookcase!:(


Fine. Be that way. can I have some of the pot?