NationStates Jolt Archive

At last something NOT RELATED to G-Dubya.

From the casting specs for the voice-over on a series of television commercials for KFC.

1. The voice should be confident.

This is a confident, progressively thinking brand. The voice should project that confidence. There should be some authority in the KFC voice. Some bass notes.

2. The voice should be fun.

Chicken, relatively speaking, is a fun food to eat. The voice should have a playful, positive quality to it—and perhaps a touch of the irreverence and sass that the Colonel himself had.

3. The voice should be inclusive.

The voice should have broad appeal. It should elicit a sort of instant universal head nod. It should sound like someone anybody would want to hang out and eat some chicken with.

4. The voice should be young and male.

The brand personality is male. It’s genuine. It’s honest. It’s Middle American. It’s young. It’s even a little brash.

5. The voice needs to sell.

There is a lot of quick, price-point copy, and it needs to hit.

At last something NOT RELATED to G-Dubya.
The Po-tay-to thread isn't related to George Bush. Unless everyone over there has really been carrying out some sort of bizarre argument in code.

On the other hand, this is just weird:
2. The voice should be fun.

Chicken, relatively speaking, is a fun food to eat. The voice should have a playful, positive quality to it—and perhaps a touch of the irreverence and sass that the Colonel himself had.
Do most people who eat chicken base their choice on the level of sass that other people who eat that chicken display?

What does everyone else base their chicken eating choices on ??
Thinking of a poll but decided to go get beer.

Anyways some more irreverent nonsense.
Americans seem to have more of this crap than anyone else ...

http://www.ep.tc/johnnysurge/index.html

At last something NOT RELATED to G-Dubya.

From the casting specs for the voice-over on a series of television commercials for KFC.

1. The voice should be confident.

This is a confident, progressively thinking brand. The voice should project that confidence. There should be some authority in the KFC voice. Some bass notes.

2. The voice should be fun.

Chicken, relatively speaking, is a fun food to eat. The voice should have a playful, positive quality to it—and perhaps a touch of the irreverence and sass that the Colonel himself had.

3. The voice should be inclusive.

The voice should have broad appeal. It should elicit a sort of instant universal head nod. It should sound like someone anybody would want to hang out and eat some chicken with.

4. The voice should be young and male.

The brand personality is male. It’s genuine. It’s honest. It’s Middle American. It’s young. It’s even a little brash.

5. The voice needs to sell.

There is a lot of quick, price-point copy, and it needs to hit.
Why not get an actual chicken to do it? Of course you couldn't understand her but its probably best as she'd be saying "FOR THE LOVE OF GOD DON'T EAT MY CHILDREN YOU SICK BASTARDS!"

Why not get an actual chicken to do it? Of course you couldn't understand her but its probably best as she'd be saying "FOR THE LOVE OF GOD DON'T EAT MY CHILDREN YOU SICK BASTARDS!"

Funny !!!
But i want to eat baby chickens now for some reason.

Funny !!!
But i want to eat baby chickens now for some reason.
I'm confused about the comic- on page 14, when the farmer can finally pay his mortgage, the collector looks very angry about it. Whats that about?

http://www.ep.tc/johnnysurge/index.html
That was indeed a great American Epic of the scope that modern writers simply dream of reaching. There should be an entire colleg course dedicated to developing a full appreciation of the Legend that is Johnny Surge.
But, then, I must ask myself, is that even enough? Is even a life-time of quiet meditiation upon that great book sufficient time to unravel all of its secrets? Perhaps not, but it would certainly be a life well spent if at the end you could proclaim to know 1 half of the depth of that most humble tome.

But wait there's more ....

http://www.ep.tc/grenada/

Potatoes and now chicken...I'm getting hungry and no one is making it easier on me!!!!!one11!!!

http://www.ep.tc/grenada/
Too many words. I blanked out and toppled out of my chair half-way thru page 1.
Needs . . . more . . . Johnny Surge *gasp, choke, loses interest*
Is that a penny?

The brand personality is male. It’s genuine. It’s honest.
You wouldn't want one of those lying females advertising chicken, would you?

I work for KFC. As of this week.

I envy the voice. They've obviously never had to cook the chicken.

Okay, so the pay is good, and the hours are just what I needed. The people are awsome. I just don't like the work much yet. Hopefully it will get better. This is likely only temporary anyways.

Chicken isn't fun. Chicken stinks. Blander and more boring than any other meat.

Chicken isn't fun. Chicken stinks. Blander and more boring than any other meat.
Chicken (like fries) is best eaten when prepared improperly. Burned, over seasoned, crumbling, tasting vaguely of cigarettes, and with lots of crunchy and greasy bits.

EDIT: And anyone who says "chicken isn't fun" has obviously never built a catapult in their backyard and hurled frozen chickens at the neighbors.

Chicken isn't fun. Chicken stinks. Blander and more boring than any other meat.
Solution=Tabasco Sauce

In the words of a very wise man (me): "If you like garlic salt and tabasco sauce you can make anything taste good."

It applies to life to.

At last something NOT RELATED to G-Dubya.

From the casting specs for the voice-over on a series of television commercials for KFC.

1. The voice should be confident.

This is a confident, progressively thinking brand. The voice should project that confidence. There should be some authority in the KFC voice. Some bass notes.

2. The voice should be fun.

Chicken, relatively speaking, is a fun food to eat. The voice should have a playful, positive quality to it—and perhaps a touch of the irreverence and sass that the Colonel himself had.

3. The voice should be inclusive.

The voice should have broad appeal. It should elicit a sort of instant universal head nod. It should sound like someone anybody would want to hang out and eat some chicken with.

4. The voice should be young and male.

The brand personality is male. It’s genuine. It’s honest. It’s Middle American. It’s young. It’s even a little brash.

5. The voice needs to sell.

There is a lot of quick, price-point copy, and it needs to hit.
I have a better Idea... the voice should be a dead ringer for Ingrid Newkirk. :D

Chickens have the right to live and so do their eggs!!!! Murderers!!!

Chickens have the right to live and so do their eggs!!!! Murderers!!!
And they have the right to be turned into tasty lumps of deep-fried food, too.

Look at it this way:

If people clog their arteries and eventually keel over from eating fried chicken, isn't there some form of symmetry for the chickens?

There is no symmetry for taking the life of a chicken. Once the life of a chicken is taken, that chicken will never know symmetry. What about the family of the chicken? Or the chicken that it might have become? What about the millions of eggs that will never know what it's like to be a firefighter or an astronaut... or even Ruler of the World?! I cry for the day that chickens no longer have the right to life!

But should the owner of the voice be a founder-member of the KKK, just like the Colonel????

At last something NOT RELATED to G-Dubya.

From the casting specs for the voice-over on a series of television commercials for KFC.

1. The voice should be confident.

This is a confident, progressively thinking brand. The voice should project that confidence. There should be some authority in the KFC voice. Some bass notes.

2. The voice should be fun.

Chicken, relatively speaking, is a fun food to eat. The voice should have a playful, positive quality to it—and perhaps a touch of the irreverence and sass that the Colonel himself had.

3. The voice should be inclusive.

The voice should have broad appeal. It should elicit a sort of instant universal head nod. It should sound like someone anybody would want to hang out and eat some chicken with.

4. The voice should be young and male.

The brand personality is male. It’s genuine. It’s honest. It’s Middle American. It’s young. It’s even a little brash.

5. The voice needs to sell.

There is a lot of quick, price-point copy, and it needs to hit.
Actually George Dubya just agreed to subsidise KFC's development in New Mexico.

Chicken (like fries) is best eaten when prepared improperly. Burned, over seasoned, crumbling, tasting vaguely of cigarettes, and with lots of crunchy and greasy bits.

EDIT: And anyone who says "chicken isn't fun" has obviously never built a catapult in their backyard and hurled frozen chickens at the neighbors.

I hurl rocks. I don't have to kill them in accordance with food standard regulations...

I hurl rocks. I don't have to kill them in accordance with food standard regulations...
Cannons are far supperior for hurling frozen chickens.

Actually George Dubya just agreed to subsidise KFC's development in New Mexico.

This was supposed to be a Bush-free zone damn your eyes !!!

This was supposed to be a Bush-free zone damn your eyes !!!
Yes he is trying to squeezr Taco Bell out of existence.

I hurl rocks. I don't have to kill them in accordance with food standard regulations...
I just used frozen chickens. They were cheap too, because there was some kind of stuff on them that made them unfit for human consumption. Nothing beats throwing a chicken covered with disease at someone.
Well, except for throwing a live chicken, but PETA has already burned one a cross on my lawn.

But should the owner of the voice be a founder-member of the KKK, just like the Colonel????

I hope the excess of question marks means you're not serious, that you don't think that's true.

I just used frozen chickens. They were cheap too, because there was some kind of stuff on them that made them unfit for human consumption. Nothing beats throwing a chicken covered with disease at someone.
Well, except for throwing a live chicken, but PETA has already burned one a cross on my lawn.
The problem is, one time somebody thought it was a bright time to hurl diseased animal caracasses over someone else's wall, it caused the Black Death...

The problem is, one time somebody thought it was a bright time to hurl diseased animal caracasses over someone else's wall, it caused the Black Death...
Bah, disease is perfectly acceptable in this day and age. Moldy chickens are perfectly healthy to be bombarded with, and any evidence to the contrary was produced by fake studies.

Bah, disease is perfectly acceptable in this day and age. Moldy chickens are perfectly healthy to be bombarded with, and any evidence to the contrary was produced by fake studies.

allright then...

allright then...
Other things that are good for you inspite of "evidence" to the contrary:

Cigarretes
Cocaine
Alcohol
Acid
The Other Acid
Political Speeches

Other things that are good for you inspite of "evidence" to the contrary:

Cigarretes
Cocaine
Alcohol
Acid
The Other Acid
Political Speeches


See also:
Unprotected sex
Microsoft
Michael Jackson

See also:
Unprotected sex
Microsoft
Michael Jackson

you forget

Air Bags
Colonic Irrigation
Switzerland

See also:
Unprotected sex
Microsoft
Michael Jackson
I must find some way to combine these three things.
Purely in the interests of science, of course.

But should the owner of the voice be a founder-member of the KKK, just like the Colonel????
I still think an Ingrid Newkirk (Chief "Media Slut" of PETA) soundalike would be best...

But should the owner of the voice be a founder-member of the KKK, just like the Colonel????

http://www.snopes.com/business/alliance/sanders.asp