NationStates Jolt Archive


Jeeze! Let the poor guy rest in peace, for crying out loud!

Eutrusca
02-11-2005, 18:57
Soldier's Body to Stay With Father


Associated Press | November 02, 2005
SAN FRANCISCO - A judge in a bitter dispute between divorced parents over where to bury a son killed in Iraq sided with the soldier's father Tuesday, saying he did not believe the mother's tearful testimony.

Army Staff Sgt. Jason Hendrix should remain buried in his father's home state of Oklahoma, despite his mother's claim that he wanted to be laid to rest in California, Superior Court Judge Robert B. Yonts Jr. ruled.

"May this brave Soldier, Sergeant Jason Hendrix, rest in peace," Yonts said.

The case focused attention a little-known Pentagon policy that says if a slain soldier is unmarried and has no children - which was the case with Hendrix - the remains are given to the elder surviving parent. Hendrix's father, Russell Hendrix, is 48; his mother, Renee Amick, 45.

Because Hendrix left no will, the only evidence of his desire to be buried in California was Amick's testimony that he told her so about a year before he died. That wish was not put in writing, and the judge did not believe the mother's story.

"The testimony of the mother appeared forced and contrived. The tears were not genuine," the judge wrote.

Amick took issue with the judge's characterization. She was barely able to fit in sentences between her sobs as she talked to reporters on the lush lawn in front of her house in the rural town of Freedom.

"Obviously, Judge Yonts doesn't know what it's like to lose a son. ... I'm very proud of my son and all I wanted to do was carry out what he wished," she said, flanked by family members, including her husband and mother. "I think it's very appalling on the judge's part to even say the things he said because I think it's very disrespectful."

Hendrix, 28, was killed by a roadside bomb Feb. 16 near the city of Ramadi. He was buried in April in a plot next to his paternal grandfather, a former Marine, after the Pentagon shipped the body to Oklahoma under its standing policy.

Hendrix's parents divorced in 1991, and Russell Hendrix was awarded custody. Jason Hendrix grew up in Watsonville, Calif., with his mother but finished high school while living with his father in Oklahoma.

According to court documents, Hendrix returned to California only to visit family. He also had an Oklahoma driver's license and listed Oklahoma as his state of residence, and there was evidence he planned to return to the state after leaving the Army, the judge said.

Moving the body would serve no purpose, the judge said.

"Jason's remains have already been dishonored by being held in cold storage for nearly six weeks between his death and burial. To further disturb the repose of the deceased would be emotionally upsetting for all members of the family," Yonts said.

Omar James, lawyer for Russell Hendrix, said he and his client are optimistic the judge's decision will end the dispute.

"I can't imagine what it's like for a mother to grieve for her son," James said. "It's just abhorrent that we had to go through this."

Amick said she hasn't yet decided whether she would appeal.

Two similar cases are pending in Nevada and Michigan.
Heron-Marked Warriors
02-11-2005, 18:59
Amen to that title, Eut.
Fass
02-11-2005, 19:02
Moral of the story: If you're going off to war, get your bloody affairs in order and write a damned will. This should be common sense, really, and something you would have expected the deceased to have done.
Vittos Ordination
02-11-2005, 19:05
Where's King Solomon when you need him? Threaten to cut the coffin in half just to expedite matters a bit.
Lunatic Goofballs
02-11-2005, 19:06
See, this is exactly why when I die, I hope they never find the body. :p
Carops
02-11-2005, 19:08
It's quite a sad story really....
Smunkeeville
02-11-2005, 19:09
it is true that death brings out the worst in people, my father's death and funeral proved that. :(

I have all my wishes written down and my husband knows what they are, I am thinking I need to get more explicit though, you know to cover more situations, because my family is nuts.
The Nazz
02-11-2005, 19:09
Personally, I don't see why the judge had to make any sort of characterization of the mother in the case. The rule is clear--barring any other evidence, the decision goes to elder surviving relative. Case closed.
Lunatic Goofballs
02-11-2005, 19:11
it is true that death brings out the worst in people, my father's death and funeral proved that. :(

I have all my wishes written down and my husband knows what they are, I am thinking I need to get more explicit though, you know to cover more situations, because my family is nuts.

Rule #65; No taxidermy! No matter how 'life-like' I look, I still want to be properly buried!
Eutrusca
02-11-2005, 19:12
Moral of the story: If you're going off to war, get your bloody affairs in order and write a damned will. This should be common sense, really, and something you would have expected the deceased to have done.
It's standard operating procedure ( SOP ) for all members of the armed forces to complete both a will and a power of attorney. What happened in this case, I can only surmise. Perhaps the servicemember didn't anticipate his parents stirring up such an all-fired fuss about where he was to be buried in the event of his death.

Regardless, the entire thing is very sad.
Fass
02-11-2005, 19:12
Personally, I don't see why the judge had to make any sort of characterization of the mother in the case.

Some people just have to be douches.
Eutrusca
02-11-2005, 19:13
See, this is exactly why when I die, I hope they never find the body. :p
Knowing you, your body will probably turn to green gas and disappear, just like the aliens in The X-Files! :D
Lewrockwellia
02-11-2005, 19:13
See, this is exactly why when I die, I hope they never find the body. :p

When I die, I'm going to be cremated and have my remains tossed into a vat of acid, so nothing remains.
Fass
02-11-2005, 19:14
Rule #65; No taxidermy! No matter how 'life-like' I look, I still want to be properly buried!

Okay, this is the first time someone here made me squirt juice up my nose. Funny stuff.
Lunatic Goofballs
02-11-2005, 19:14
Knowing you, your body will probably turn to green gas and disappear, just like the aliens in The X-Files! :D

I'm working on it. :cool:
Lunatic Goofballs
02-11-2005, 19:15
Okay, this is the first time someone here made me squirt juice up my nose. Funny stuff.

You're in glad company. :cool:


*makes another check mark in the notebook*
Eutrusca
02-11-2005, 19:17
it is true that death brings out the worst in people, my father's death and funeral proved that. :(

I have all my wishes written down and my husband knows what they are, I am thinking I need to get more explicit though, you know to cover more situations, because my family is nuts.
Just as soon as I can afford to retain a lawyer, I intend to update my will, write out a living will, and designate my oldest daughter with medical power of attorney. I will leave a rather sizable estate, and I want it all to go into a trust fund for my ex's support and for educational expenses for my grandchildren. I intend to designate my younger son and his wife as trustees because they handle money better than anyone else in the family.

The one thing I definitely do NOT want is internecine warfare between members of my family. I may get the lawyer to write something into my will that, should family members get into a battle over the will, that everything goes to charity! Heh!
Fass
02-11-2005, 19:19
You're in glad company. :cool:
*makes another check mark in the notebook*

It was the "life-like" part that did me in. My nose is still dripping, and I'm still giggling.
Smunkeeville
02-11-2005, 19:21
Rule #65; No taxidermy! No matter how 'life-like' I look, I still want to be properly buried!
actually if my husband had me "stuffed" it would probably horrify my family less than what is actually being done with my body. I told them numerous times that he is to ship me to the body farm (http://web.utk.edu/%7Eanthrop/FACdonation.html) but I am sure they still think I am kidding. I really am serious about it though.

My wishes go as follows
1 make sure I am dead
2 donate anything donatable
3 ship what's left to the body farm

and then some stuff about life support and what to do with my money but those won't be really contested as much as the body farm thing will.
Smunkeeville
02-11-2005, 19:23
Just as soon as I can afford to retain a lawyer, I intend to update my will, write out a living will, and designate my oldest daughter with medical power of attorney. I will leave a rather sizable estate, and I want it all to go into a trust fund for my ex's support and for educational expenses for my grandchildren. I intend to designate my younger son and his wife as trustees because they handle money better than anyone else in the family.

The one thing I definitely do NOT want is internecine warfare between members of my family. I may get the lawyer to write something into my will that, should family members get into a battle over the will, that everything goes to charity! Heh!
my grandfather's will says that if anything is contested at all that instead of 20% of his estate going to the church that ALL of it will go. It will be interesting to see my family not fight about it.
Eutrusca
02-11-2005, 19:29
my grandfather's will says that if anything is contested at all that instead of 20% of his estate going to the church that ALL of it will go. It will be interesting to see my family not fight about it.
ROFLMAO! Good for him! Yayyy, grampa! :D
Uber Awesome
02-11-2005, 19:49
My wishes go as follows
1 make sure I am dead

"Hey she might not be dead, get the shotgun to make sure"

J/K
Smunkeeville
02-11-2005, 20:08
"Hey she might not be dead, get the shotgun to make sure"

J/K
that is partly because my family has a weird definition of dead, my aunt has said before that if you are not "fully functioning" you are dead. That means that when I was on bed rest when I was pregnant then according to her I was dead. There is a whole lot of legal language about what I mean when I say dead. I stripped away all the legal stuff to be brief.

btw that is something my family would do, if they thought for a second that any of my money was going to them. :(

ROFLMAO! Good for him! Yayyy, grampa!
If I were him I wouldn't have let the family know that the clause was in there, just let it jump up and scare them right after I died. Because it has kinda backfired as they have decided to fight about thier "inheritance" while he is still alive. I keep telling them that until he dies it is HIS MONEY, not thiers, and that if they keep this up they aren't going to get any of it, because I am pretty sure that he is about to get fed up and write them all out anyway.
I told them I would rather enjoy my time now with grandpa then fight about something as dumb as money and they replied "you just think it is dumb because you have some" and I said "if you would get off your butt and work instead of whining all the damn time about not having any you would have some" at this point I figured out that I was getting too annoyed by the situation and decided to go to sonic. I love hot fudge sundays when I am angry :D