NationStates Jolt Archive

Well...after a fairly successful show on Saturday, my band daymonthyear (http://www.daymonthyear.net) has decided to call it quits after 2 and a 1/2 years

So now what? I'm nearly 30, wife and kids, regular job. Do I hang up my sticks and call it a day? Or try to put together another band?

Feel free to make suggestions and share similar war stories. This isn't the first time I've had a band break-up...just the first time when I was nearly 30.

You could think about the Army...

This song says it all:

well i thought about the army
dad said, son you're fucking high
and i thought, yeah there's a first for everything
so i took my old man's advice
three sad semesters
it was only fifteen grand spent in bed
i thought about the army
i dropped out and joined a band instead

grew a moustache and a mullet
got a job at chic-fil-a
citing artistic differences
the band broke up in may
and in june reformed without me
and they'd got a different name
i nuked another grandma's apple pie
and hung my head in shame

i've been thinking a lot today
i've been thinking a lot today

oh, i think i'll write a screenplay
oh, i think i'll take it to LA
oh, i think i'll get it done yesterday

in this time of introspection
on the eve of my election
i say to my reflection
god, please spare me more rejection
'cause my peers, they criticize me
and my ex-wives all despise me
try to put it all behind me
but my redneck past is nipping at my heels

i've been thinking a lot today
i've been thinking a lot today
i've been thinking a lot today
i thought about the army...

Sierra...how did you know? I love that damn song.

get yourself another band and rock

Sierra...how did you know? I love that damn song.

I actually enlisted in the Army - so if that change was made to the song, it would be the story of my life.

I actually enlisted in the Army - so if that change was made to the song, it would be the story of my life.

So you also worked at Chik-Fil-A? :)

get yourself another band and rock

Should I? Am I getting too old to rock?

I wonder if its time for me to retire into like a Celtic Rock (think the Pogues) band and relax a bit. Get away from this emo/indie rock scene for a while.

Should I? Am I getting too old to rock?

I wonder if its time for me to retire into like a Celtic Rock (think the Pogues) band and relax a bit. Get away from this emo/indie rock scene for a while.
whatever you feel comfortable with, but you're never too old to rock! and certainly not at 30... just look at the 'Stones FFS :p

I'm nearly 30...

Young whippersnapper.

Do I hang up my sticks and call it a day?

Sticks? Drummers are always in demand. Stick at it.

In the meantime, possibly consider helping out some of the youngsters with the conenctions you have made - a bit of management work can't harm you while waiting for your next band to come along.

Sticks? Drummers are always in demand. Stick at it.

Drummers in demand??

Not in my neck of the woods. :(

So you also worked at Chik-Fil-A? :)

Yes.

I think the emo/indie thing is long overdone. Even the bands that sprang up as a reaction to emo (like the "Fuck Emos" band) are long since done.

If you want to make some money, do the same emo thing, but make it Christian. Seen a couple of bands really make money that way.

Drummers in demand??

Not in my neck of the woods. :(

In my neck of the woods there is a constant surfeit of guitar players and bassists. Drummers and, to a lesser extent, brass players are always the ones who end up playing for three or four bands at the same time.*





* Not literally 'playing for three or four bands at the same time', although that would be cool. I guess I mean 'being in three or four bands at the same time'.

So now what? I'm nearly 30, wife and kids, regular job. Do I hang up my sticks and call it a day? Or try to put together another band?


I'm 33, wife and kids, etc etc etc .... they can take my sticks when they pry them out of my cold, dead hands.

What do you mean, "now what"? You're a grown man! Do what you want to do. It's the single greatest thing about being an adult. Either find another band, or go into the studio and do some solo work (any instruments you can't play, grab a local studio musician to fill it out). That's primarily what I do now.

number one your never to old to be in a band.

Two, if the wife is making good money. There is no reason not to pursue your passion

Three, Your kids will think your cool if your in a band. I think most would anyway.

Four, Working is for chumps!

Yes.

I think the emo/indie thing is long overdone. Even the bands that sprang up as a reaction to emo (like the "Fuck Emos" band) are long since done.

If you want to make some money, do the same emo thing, but make it Christian. Seen a couple of bands really make money that way.

I think being an atheist prevent me from being in a Christian band...it tends to bother me...

You're a drummer, there will always be work for you.

number one your never to old to be in a band.

Two, if the wife is making good money. There is no reason not to pursue your passion

Three, Your kids will think your cool if your in a band. I think most would anyway.

Four, Working is for chumps!

I think three is the interesting point. I have no problem e-mailing our mailing list and telling them we've broken up...but I can't find a way to break it to my 5 year old. I think it would be too hard for him to get over.

I think being an atheist prevent me from being in a Christian band...it tends to bother me...

Well, If you believe that there's no god then there's no punishment for being a hypocrite.

Should I? Am I getting too old to rock?


Are you kidding me? You've got a good 10 or 15 years left in you before you lose the ability to rock and have to stick to easy listening. :p

(kidding...you're only as old as you feel, right?)

Start a new band, with a different sound...do something that'll keep you interested (and thus, creative).

Well...after a fairly successful show on Saturday, my band daymonthyear (http://www.daymonthyear.net) has decided to call it quits after 2 and a 1/2 years

So now what? I'm nearly 30, wife and kids, regular job. Do I hang up my sticks and call it a day? Or try to put together another band?

Feel free to make suggestions and share similar war stories. This isn't the first time I've had a band break-up...just the first time when I was nearly 30.
You have 3 options
1 quit
2 try to start a new band
3 try to get into an exsisting band and hang there

or you can do 3 and 2 at the same time (I guess that makes 4 options)

anyway drummers are hard to come by, so if you choose option 3 it wouldn't take long to get back into playing. ;)

Rock on !!!

http://www.reifrock.com/band/drummer-comic.gif

Have you considered faking your way into a really posh school as a substitute teacher because you're in desperate need of rent money? You never know.. the kids could be really talented musicians and you could shape them into rockstars only to lose out in the battle off the bands contest to your former band..

You could think about the Army...

This song says it all:

well i thought about the army
dad said, son you're fucking high
and i thought, yeah there's a first for everything
so i took my old man's advice
three sad semesters
it was only fifteen grand spent in bed
i thought about the army
i dropped out and joined a band instead

grew a moustache and a mullet
got a job at chic-fil-a
citing artistic differences
the band broke up in may
and in june reformed without me
and they'd got a different name
i nuked another grandma's apple pie
and hung my head in shame

i've been thinking a lot today
i've been thinking a lot today

oh, i think i'll write a screenplay
oh, i think i'll take it to LA
oh, i think i'll get it done yesterday

in this time of introspection
on the eve of my election
i say to my reflection
god, please spare me more rejection
'cause my peers, they criticize me
and my ex-wives all despise me
try to put it all behind me
but my redneck past is nipping at my heels

i've been thinking a lot today
i've been thinking a lot today
i've been thinking a lot today
i thought about the army...
Ben Folds is awesome.



You'll find another band soon enough, there are always bands looking for members on any instrument.

If you're a decent drummer, have you thought about doing session musician work?

I think being an atheist prevent me from being in a Christian band...it tends to bother me...
That never stopped Eric Cartman!

Well...after a fairly successful show on Saturday, my band daymonthyear (http://www.daymonthyear.net) has decided to call it quits after 2 and a 1/2 years
So now what? I'm nearly 30, wife and kids, regular job. Do I hang up my sticks and call it a day? Or try to put together another band?
That depends. Do the reasons why you would want to be in a band outweigh the possible/existing negative impacts (for instance by taking up time and energy you believe you have better uses for)

Should I? Am I getting too old to rock?
No, but you may be at a point where 'rocking' is not the most optimal choice for you. Your age doesnt really matter. What matters is your goals and priorities, and the implications being or not being in a rock band have in relation to those goals and priorities.

I wonder if its time for me to retire into like a Celtic Rock (think the Pogues) band and relax a bit. Get away from this emo/indie rock scene for a while.
Again it really depends on you, your situation, and implications of the alternatives you are considering.

Why would you want to be in the emo/indie scene? Why would you not?
Why would you want to take up celtic rock, why would you not?
Could you do both, and what would be the implications of that?
Is there some other thing you could do as well or instead of one or both or the above? Why would you do or not do that other thing?

What implications do the various answers to the above questions have in relation to your overall goals and priorities at this time?

Basically, without knowing the answers to the above questions, I'm not informed enough to offer specific advice as to what you ought to do. However I do believe that your age is not a significant factor in and of itself, for deciding either way. What you ought to consider is the choices you have, and the implications of the choices in relation to your overall goals and priorities.

Well, If you believe that there's no god then there's no punishment for being a hypocrite.

Interesting point...

If you're a decent drummer, have you thought about doing session musician work?

I have done session work a few times. The money is good, but it isn't as much fun. Especially since it always seems to be hip-hop guys willing to pay $100 an hour for mee to sit there and play the most basic of beats.

That depends. Do the reasons why you would want to be in a band outweigh the possible/existing negative impacts (for instance by taking up time and energy you believe you have better uses for)


No, but you may be at a point where 'rocking' is not the most optimal choice for you. Your age doesnt really matter. What matters is your goals and priorities, and the implications being or not being in a rock band have in relation to those goals and priorities.


Again it really depends on you, your situation, and implications of the alternatives you are considering.

Why would you want to be in the emo/indie scene? Why would you not?
Why would you want to take up celtic rock, why would you not?
Could you do both, and what would be the implications of that?
Is there some other thing you could do as well or instead of one or both or the above? Why would you do or not do that other thing?

What implications do the various answers to the above questions have in relation to your overall goals and priorities at this time?

Basically, without knowing the answers to the above questions, I'm not informed enough to offer specific advice as to what you ought to do. However I do believe that your age is not a significant factor in and of itself, for deciding either way. What you ought to consider is the choices you have, and the implications of the choices in relation to your overall goals and priorities.


thanks...without giving advice you've given me alot to think about in order to make a better decision for myself. Which is more than likely better than advice.

Rock on !!!

http://www.reifrock.com/band/drummer-comic.gif

Saved to the hard drive...thanks...

I wish I was in a band, so if you have the oppurtunity to do so, I'd say you should.

Oddly enough....in the last 24 hours I've had 2 offers to join other bands. Apparently people don't wait for the dust to settle...

Now I have a whole seperate decision to make.

Oddly enough....in the last 24 hours I've had 2 offers to join other bands. Apparently people don't wait for the dust to settle...

Now I have a whole seperate decision to make.
I told you it wouldn't take long. ;)

I told you it wouldn't take long. ;)

I just have to figure out how to tell my bass player for the last 4 bands I've been in and the last 5 years or so that I might not need him. It's weird, like going to high school again.

I just have to figure out how to tell my bass player for the last 4 bands I've been in and the last 5 years or so that I might not need him. It's weird, like going to high school again.
ah, bass players are almost in as much demand as drummers he will live.

ah, bass players are almost in as much demand as drummers he will live.

True...he needs a break anyway...just had a baby. I will probably end up hooking up with him again in a few months though ;)

Drummers in demand??

Not in my neck of the woods. :(
I envy your neck of the woods. Here it usually costs your first-born to get a good drummer for a gig. There are very few drummers, and even fewer good ones. Most of them are already pulling double or triple band duty. Makes it awful hard for a new band to get going.

I envy your neck of the woods. Here it usually costs your first-born to get a good drummer for a gig. There are very few drummers, and even fewer good ones. Most of them are already pulling double or triple band duty. Makes it awful hard for a new band to get going.
same here, everyone wants to be the lead singer or play the guitar, it took us 6 months one time to find a bass player and a full year to find a drummer that could even follow a basic rythym :(

same here, everyone wants to be the lead singer or play the guitar, it took us 6 months one time to find a bass player and a full year to find a drummer that could even follow a basic rythym :(
We don't even have many guitarist whom I trust in my band. I finally got two of them. And a keyboard player. And all four of us sing, so we're set there (we are going to do some tight vocal stuff). I play bass. I just need a decent freakin drummer:headbang:

We don't even have many guitarist whom I trust in my band. I finally got two of them. And a keyboard player. And all four of us sing, so we're set there (we are going to do some tight vocal stuff). I play bass. I just need a decent freakin drummer:headbang:
if you were anywhere near here I could help out. I play drums, bass, guitar, keyboard ect. My problem came that I couldn't play two at once, so if one member quit I could sub in thier spot and sing at the same time, but when 2 quit we were screwed. :(

It wasn't too hard to find guitarists though because most of the songs we played only had about 3 chords in them anyway, it was really lyrically driven.

try getting a more conventional job for the moment, and forming a band in your spare time, just as an internecene finacial imput.

All I can say to that is this...

In Buffalo, there are about 500 drummers, of which 10 are well known and tend to get recycled through the scene. I like to think I am one of those ten.

Bass players are more unique. There are only about 100 worth a snot, and of those I can only think of about 3 or 4 worth working with. And there are a lot of people who are bass players that jump the fence to guitar and vice versa.