NationStates Jolt Archive

Edit: clearly the first post is too long...I'll move it to the second post.

Short version: should I get an Albanian immigrant to be my children's nanny?

Here is the situation. I was raised in a working class family, and I have some deep-seated prejudices about the 'kind of person' who needs to hire a gardener, a housekeeper, or a nanny. And yet, I find myself now in the situation where a nanny might be what is best for me and my family. And hell, I already pay a babysitter...but a nanny LIVES with you... I am very torn, because this issue also involves the added element of immigration and possible power imbalance. Let me explain.

I am planning to go back to University to study law, beginning next September. I will be moving out to my parent's farm, which is about an hour outside of the city where I will be studying. There is no childcare right around the farm, and the closest day home is in a town on the way to the city. My eldest starts school in September, but I want her in the school closest to our home, which happens to NOT be in the town that offers childcare. The logistical nightmare involved in getting the kids to school/a day home, and getting my eldest from school to the day home is...well...nightmarish.

So a friend suggested something. Her husband is Albanian, and his sister would love to come here. She has a day home in Albania. Getting into Canada, for the regular person, is a very difficult prospect...and Albania happens to be on our shit-list for whatever reason, so it's almost impossible to get here without a job lined up for you and someone willing to vouch for you. I could bring her here, and pay her what I would pay our regular day home person...but here are my concerns:

1) it's hard to move to a new country...no matter how well you think you'll take the transition, it is going to be a struggle. This woman would be living with us in an isolated rural environment, and I'm worried she wouldn't cope.

2) I don't like the power imbalance. As her employer, and the sole reason she would be let in the country, I could get her deported in an eye blink. I would never do such a thing, but it puts the following pressure on me:
a) if I don't want to continue to employ her, she's screwed...because under our visa rules, she would have to leave the country and reapply for a job...she could not just find another job and move on
b) if I keep her working for us, she will probably feel as though she must tread softly because of our ability to get her kicked out...even if we would never want that to happen, she would probably not really trust us, or her right to speak up and such.

3) I just feel weird about having an employee that lives with us. Not because of the living arrangement, but it smacks of servitude or slavery, and it bothers me. I would want our relationship to be very clearly defined (you work these hours, the rest are your own to do with as you wish, you have these rights, these responsibilities, and these are OUR rights and responsibilities and so forth)

Thoughts? Suggestions?

Albanian? No. Get some other nationality. How about an au-pair?

Just in case anyone is unclear...I don't mean a female goat when I talk about nannys here, okay?

Albanian? No. Get some other nationality. How about an au-pair?
What...you don't like Albanians?
I want someone I at least have some tenuous connection with...a cousin of a friend...a relative of my husband...the sister of my friend's husband...not a random stranger. A non-random stranger.

And my kids could be exposed to a very different language...that's a bonus:)

Should you not pick someone from a country that speaks English and is culturally at least a bit similar to Canada?

Try looking around that area first. You never know what you might find.

Here is the situation. I was raised in a working class family, and I have some deep-seated prejudices about the 'kind of person' who needs to hire a gardener, a housekeeper, or a nanny. And yet, I find myself now in the situation where a nanny might be what is best for me and my family. And hell, I already pay a babysitter...but a nanny LIVES with you... I am very torn, because this issue also involves the added element of immigration and possible power imbalance. Let me explain.

I am planning to go back to University to study law, beginning next September. I will be moving out to my parent's farm, which is about an hour outside of the city where I will be studying. There is no childcare right around the farm, and the closest day home is in a town on the way to the city. My eldest starts school in September, but I want her in the school closest to our home, which happens to NOT be in the town that offers childcare. The logistical nightmare involved in getting the kids to school/a day home, and getting my eldest from school to the day home is...well...nightmarish.

So a friend suggested something. Her husband is Albanian, and his sister would love to come here. She has a day home in Albania. Getting into Canada, for the regular person, is a very difficult prospect...and Albania happens to be on our shit-list for whatever reason, so it's almost impossible to get here without a job lined up for you and someone willing to vouch for you. I could bring her here, and pay her what I would pay our regular day home person...but here are my concerns:

1) it's hard to move to a new country...no matter how well you think you'll take the transition, it is going to be a struggle. This woman would be living with us in an isolated rural environment, and I'm worried she wouldn't cope.

2) I don't like the power imbalance. As her employer, and the sole reason she would be let in the country, I could get her deported in an eye blink. I would never do such a thing, but it puts the following pressure on me:
a) if I don't want to continue to employ her, she's screwed...because under our visa rules, she would have to leave the country and reapply for a job...she could not just find another job and move on
b) if I keep her working for us, she will probably feel as though she must tread softly because of our ability to get her kicked out...even if we would never want that to happen, she would probably not really trust us, or her right to speak up and such.

3) I just feel weird about having an employee that lives with us. Not because of the living arrangement, but it smacks of servitude or slavery, and it bothers me. I would want our relationship to be very clearly defined (you work these hours, the rest are your own to do with as you wish, you have these rights, these responsibilities, and these are OUR rights and responsibilities and so forth)

Thoughts? Suggestions?
1. Yes, moving to a new country is hard. But you shouldn't worry about this problem so much. I'm sure the woman has considered the difficulty in moving to a new country. She's decided that, despite that fact, she'd be much happier in Canada.

2. This one is a little tricky. Primarily, you should ask yourself, is this woman likely to give me any reason to fire her. If so, don't hire her in the first place, because, as you have pointed out, it will only lead to emotional difficulties for you. If you think she would be a good nanny, then you probably have nothing to worry about.

3. Finally, remember that you've worked hard to earn your money. It would be irresponsible of you not to spend it on the things you value most. So don't let anyone tell you that it is "wrong" for you to spend that money in a certain way. What would be wrong is if you didn't use your blessings to the fullest of their capacity. Whether that creates an "atmosphere of servitude" is irrelovent if you pay her a fair wage.

Should you not pick someone from a country that speaks English and is culturally at least a bit similar to Canada?
English is not a pre-requesite for me. As for cultural similarity...it's the little things that cause cultural conflict, not the big ones. You expect the big stuff...differences in religion, in climate, in language. But little things like taking your shoes off or not when you enter a home...having a bowl of salt to season your food as you eat as opposed to a shaker...eating one big meal at 3, and just snacks besides that as opposed to three square meals...those are the things that get people the most. And even were I to bring someone from Ireland, (and it's debatable as to whether we share the same language:)), cultural similarities only go so far. Plus...the cultural differences between urban and rural could quite easily negate any other cultural similarities...an urban USian for example may find themselves suffering from culture shock in the country, while a Ukrainian might be fine...

In short (too late!), culture and language are not going to be the deciding factors either for my choice, or the person's likelihood of survival here.

Try looking around that area first. You never know what you might find.
If I'm going to open my home to someone, and do this...I want to double up and help someone out too. Immigration happens to be a sore spot with us, and I'd like to be the 'in' if possibly. Plus...Canuks are too damn uppity...have you met Stephistan?:D

Edit: clearly the first post is too long...I'll move it to the second post.

Short version: should I get an Albanian immigrant to be my children's nanny?

Go for it! Having your children brought up around as many cultures as possible is the best way to ensure a proper upbringing.

theres nothing wrong with having a nanny. nothing wrong with her being foreign.

does she speak good english? do you have any idea of her theories of childcare? it would be a shame to have to fire her.

you have to be careful to have her be a nanny and not a maid. you can easily start expecting her to do way more work than the amount of money you pay her warrants. she needs regular hours, duties set in writing, regular days off and extra pay for when she does anything that doesnt involve child care (starting dinner, watching the children in the evening while you study or go out, any shopping or housework)

you have to consider her privacy--her own room and what about the bathroom thing? you have to think about what the policy will be about her dating or having friends over to visit. the more you decide beforehand the better you will handle it

do you know anything about canadian regulations for taxes on employees? in the US an employer has to pay certain taxes and keep financial records for the employee to be able to file a tax return.

seems like a good solution to me.

Albanians aren't the most family friendly type, generally, I think. Fass is somewhat right. Not to pour on the stereotypes but their reputation over here isn't exactly great. Still, your call if you trust him, I'd prefer an au pair personally. :)

PS: I am not a racist. There may be good Albanians about, I just happen to be a bit prejudiced, personally. Please don't take it badly.

What...you don't like Albanians?

They have a terrible reputation, and you should be wary of your kids, IHMO. It's all terribly non-PC and all, but that's sort of my experience. Prejudiced or not, and I do feel guilty for it...

I want someone I at least have some tenuous connection with...a cousin of a friend...a relative of my husband...the sister of my friend's husband...not a random stranger. A non-random stranger.

And my kids could be exposed to a very different language...that's a bonus:)

Au-pairs are great for that. I don't think they cost as much, and they're kids, so you can boss them around a bit better.

theres nothing wrong with having a nanny. nothing wrong with her being foreign.

does she speak good english? do you have any idea of her theories of childcare? it would be a shame to have to fire her.
I'd have to interview her very extensively first. And she speaks not a speck of English...but I'm not too worried. She speaks Greek, and I understand it enough because of my Spanish to be able to get the gist...and she'll pick up some English, and I'll pick up some Albanian. It'll be fine...I'm used to communicating with people despite the language barrier. I don't mind her speaking just Albanian to the kids. Power to them all.

you have to be careful to have her be a nanny and not a maid. you can easily start expecting her to do way more work than the amount of money you pay her warrants. she needs regular hours, duties set in writing, regular days off and extra pay for when she does anything that doesnt involve child care (starting dinner, watching the children in the evening while you study or go out, any shopping or housework) Yes. I want a written contract, to protect her, and to make things clear...my babysitter doesn't clean my home, or make my meals, and if I run over hours, I pay her extra. This woman deserves the same. That being said, she'd be living with us rent free, and I'd be providing the board too...I'm not sure how to factor that in. I honestly don't see it being a big extra expense, and I'm inclined to ignore that part. I also want to make sure she is able to get into the city to visit her brother...and get out and do things on her own...but that's going to be hard unless we give her rides. We'll have to figure that part out.

you have to consider her privacy--her own room and what about the bathroom thing? you have to think about what the policy will be about her dating or having friends over to visit. the more you decide beforehand the better you will handle it
This would be about a three year thing for her...hopefully she could start her papers for permanent residency after the first year, and be set up with the money by then to pay all the application fees and such. She would have the basement to herself, with the bathroom, a living room, and a bedroom. Until our kids are older, we don't really need that space, so I think that aspect is covered. Now...as for having friends over and such...yikes. That is a tough one, because we tend to be pretty antisocial when it comes to people in our house. We prefer to go out than have people in. I'm not sure about that part.

do you know anything about canadian regulations for taxes on employees? in the US an employer has to pay certain taxes and keep financial records for the employee to be able to file a tax return.

seems like a good solution to me.
I am going to have to look into this...domestic class workers have a different tax classification. I'm not sure how it works...and the rules for finding someone are complicated...I may not be able to go the direct route. We'll see. This is in the initial planning stages, but I'm worrying about it now because immigration papers take ages to process...if I start in the New Year, it may be too late.

Albanians aren't the most family friendly type, generally, I think. Fass is somewhat right. Not to pour on the stereotypes but their reputation over here isn't exactly great. Still, your call if you trust him, I'd prefer an au pair personally. :)

PS: I am not a racist. There may be good Albanians about, I just happen to be a bit prejudiced, personally. Please don't take it badly.
Hmmmm...not family friendly...in what way (and yes, I know you are speaking of stereotypes, so don't worry that I'll take what you say amiss)? You see...the average (stereotypical) Canadian isn't particular 'family friendly' either by many standards...often we live away from our immediate family, fob our elders off on the health care system, etc...

They have a terrible reputation, and you should be wary of your kids, IHMO. It's all terribly non-PC and all, but that's sort of my experience. Prejudiced or not, and I do feel guilty for it...

Au-pairs are great for that. I don't think they cost as much, and they're kids, so you can boss them around a bit better.
What is this reputation? And as for hiring kids...I'd really prefer an adult who has some life experience. Nor do I wish to 'boss' someone around. I need someone who knows what they are doing, and can keep their head in a crisis.

Here is the situation. I was raised in a working class family, and I have some deep-seated prejudices about the 'kind of person' who needs to hire a gardener, a housekeeper, or a nanny.

I was thinking the same thing.

I was thinking the same thing.
*smacks you with a frozen trout*
Hush I say!

No, but seriously...I already have a nanny of sorts...the dayhome woman who currently cares for my kids while I'm at work...do you see a problem with that?

For one thing, I know where my prejudices come from...they come from the fact that my mom stayed home and did all the housework, and the child-rearing. My dad was never expected to raise a finger, because he worked outside the home. Well, both my husband and I work outside the home. We need SOMEONE to care for the kids...

Oh, and since we're laying out our biases (please, someone explain the Albanian thing...we really don't have enough of them to have formed any sort of notions), I'll admit that I don't want a Canadian for a number of reasons:

1. Deep-seated racism against First Nations (indigenous) people in Canada is so prevalent, many people don't even realise how prejudiced they are. I don't want to deal with this in my home (oh look, mommy's having a glass of wine, did you know that Indians are prone to alcoholism?)

2. No cultural exposure. Come on...just a bland, boring, run of the mill, uppity Canadian? Why?

3. Canadian family values are (in general) not compatible with my family values. My people are much more communal. So why don't I hire a native nanny? Because were I living in a native community, this wouldn't even be an issue...the care would come with the community. But I'm outside the circle, and it's an awkward thing, best avoided.

And Letila...get back here and elaborate, damn it!

*smacks you with a frozen trout*
Hush I say!

No, but seriously...I already have a nanny of sorts...the dayhome woman who currently cares for my kids while I'm at work...do you see a problem with that?

For one thing, I know where my prejudices come from...they come from the fact that my mom stayed home and did all the housework, and the child-rearing. My dad was never expected to raise a finger, because he worked outside the home. Well, both my husband and I work outside the home. We need SOMEONE to care for the kids...
really there is NOTHING wrong with having a live-in nanny.

you arent a stay at home mom. someone is going to be helping you with the kids. it may as well be someone who lives in your home.

youre a good mom, you know what your kids need. just dont talk yourself into taking this woman on if there are any red flags. the pressure to get it all settled can cause you to make a mistake. keep that in mind and youll do whats best for your kids.

youre a good mom, you know what your kids need. just dont talk yourself into taking this woman on if there are any red flags. the pressure to get it all settled can cause you to make a mistake. keep that in mind and youll do whats best for your kids.
Yeah...it's just that I'm trying to multi-task...help out someone who wants to come to Canada AND get a good nanny. These things are not necessarily going to be linked. I'm going to have to look into this more...it's so tough though, because really, how well can you know anyone? I'm always cautious, even when the person seems great. You just never know. It's really hard to switch caregivers...they form such a bond with the kids, and that is a great thing. I wish my current sitter could just move out with us:p , but she's got this pesky family of her own and all!

Oh come on people...you can't 'warn' me about Albanians and not give me some details!!!!

"Hey, don't eat turkey sandwiches!"
"Why not?"
"We just know not to eat them, is all!"
"But...um...why not?"
*silence*

Yeah...drives ya crazy, doesn't it!

Sounds like quite the dilemma. I'd be concerned about the cultural challenges of someone who's moving to a new country with a new language (most likely), a new culture, and limited resources. I'd also be concerned with the fact that this is someone who's living with your family and, arguably helping you raise your children that you're dealing with, not just a babysitter who flits in and flits out (not to say yours does, but I think you see where I'm coming from).

Moving to another part of the country is difficult enough and moving to Canada from the United States would be a challenge in its own right. Now add to it moving across an ocean with a new language to add to the cultural differences between the United States and Canada and the responsibility of taking care of children. I think I'd be really leery of going through with the arrangement.

And Letila...get back here and elaborate, damn it!

There's not much else to say, really, other than that capitalism pisses me off.

Sounds like quite the dilemma. I'd be concerned about the cultural challenges of someone who's moving to a new country with a new language (most likely), a new culture, and limited resources. I'd also be concerned with the fact that this is someone who's living with your family and, arguably helping you raise your children that you're dealing with, not just a babysitter who flits in and flits out (not to say yours does, but I think you see where I'm coming from).

Moving to another part of the country is difficult enough and moving to Canada from the United States would be a challenge in its own right. Now add to it moving across an ocean with a new language to add to the cultural differences between the United States and Canada and the responsibility of taking care of children. I think I'd be really leery of going through with the arrangement.
Damn it. Good points all, and reasonably made. Hmmm...I wonder how much these au-pair folks' wages cost...

It does seem a bit like a recipie for disaster...I don't need a nanny who is bound for breakdown...the problem is you can't really predict who is going to break down and who isn't...some people can handle the move, and some really can't.

You know, Sinuhue, if your kids were laboring in the salt pits like they should be, you wouldn't have to ask this kind of question.

SALT PITS BUILD CHARACTER! SPARE THE LIFE OF HARD LABOR, SPOIL THE CHILD!

There's not much else to say, really, other than that capitalism pisses me off.
It pisses me off too, but I exist within it. Working out of the home is what is best for me, and my family. My family members can not care for my children in my absence, and they of course would be my first choice. The only other option then is to hire someone to do this work.

You know, Sinuhue, if your kids were laboring in the salt pits like they should be, you wouldn't have to ask this kind of question.

SALT PITS BUILD CHARACTER! SPARE THE LIFE OF HARD LABOR, SPOIL THE CHILD!
Hehehehehe...of course, were my children in the salt pits, I'd likely be right there beside them...

...I'll take being spoiled over that, thanks:)

Hehehehehe...of course, were my children in the salt pits, I'd likely be right there beside them...

...I'll take being spoiled over that, thanks:)
Pfft. Liberals.

Pfft. Liberals.
That's a naughty word in Canada! Try...bleeding-heart, or liberal with a small 'l':) It's less offensive.

That's a naughty word in Canada! Try...bleeding-heart, or liberal with a small 'l':) It's less offensive.
Yeah, because you know how much I hate being offensive...:P

Yeah, because you know how much I hate being offensive...:P
Well, PC as you are.... *ducks*

I still don't get the Albanian thing.

There's not much else to say, really, other than that capitalism pisses me off.
what pisses you off about it? the part where a woman is able to enjoy some life other than taking care of her children 24/7 or the part where she can make so much money that she can have someone in her home rather than put her small children in an institutional setting?

what pisses you off about it? the part where a woman is able to enjoy some life other than taking care of her children 24/7 or the part where she can make so much money that she can have someone in her home rather than put her small children in an institutional setting?
Yeah...it's not like I own WalMart or something!

So, because I can't use the damn poll tool...the votes so far are:

a) do it...but stay away from the Albanians!

b) do it...just make sure the person is sane.

c) you evil, corrupt, capitalist slave owning pig, quit your job and stay at home!

Well, PC as you are.... *ducks*
hehe ;)

I still don't get the Albanian thing.
Me neither. I just keep thinking about the Simpsons episode where they get the Albanian exchange student who turns out to be a spy.

I've done some quick searches on Au Pair placements....it seems to be just as complicated to do it that way as to do the work yourself and make an offer of employment to someone overseas you've already chosen. It's a damn lot of paperwork! Pain in the ass paperwork! Finding a live-in seems to be the sticking point...most Canadians want to be live-outs, and unless they live over at the next farm, that wouldn't work.

....

I still don't get the Albanian thing.
The reputation they have over here in Europe is of being very over-represented in heavy-duty gang crime, especially of the cross-border smuggling and prostitution variety. That and the fact their country is dirt-poor, small and chaotic, next door to wealthy EU countries, so there's a lot of illegal immigrants from Albania operating (of neccessity) in the shadow economy. That said, I've practically no personal experience of them, but people I know who do say they're generally very decent sorts. (Apart from a couple of friends I have from Greece, who loathe them.)

On your OP, I'd share your concerns and general unease. In particular, if someone was to live in my house and look after my children when they were young, I'd have wanted to know a lot about them first. And it would also have been very imprtant to me to be able to terminate the arrangement quickly and cleanly, if it's not working. It doesn't sound to me like you would feel you had that last freedom.

Does the university you'll be studying at have chidcare facilities?

Edit: clearly the first post is too long...I'll move it to the second post.

Short version: should I get an Albanian immigrant to be my children's nanny?
Sounds to me like you're doing the Albanian a favor in getting them into Canada. Or out of Albania, anyway. Lay out the ground rules, the pros and cons of the job, and see what they say. Maybe even give them an open ticket back to Albania for the possibility that things don't work out.

But, wouldn't you rather have an interview with a nanny before you commit so much responsibility? There should be an agency that would offer up some choices.

Have you asked your parents about watching the kid(s)? My parents and in-laws would have been offended at the mention of moving a stranger into their home to take care of their grandkids.

The reputation they have over here in Europe is of being very over-represented in heavy-duty gang crime, especially of the cross-border smuggling and prostitution variety. That and the fact their country is dirt-poor, small and chaotic, next door to wealthy EU countries, so there's a lot of illegal immigrants from Albania operating (of neccessity) in the shadow economy. That said, I've practically no personal experience of them, but people I know who do say they're generally very decent sorts. (Apart from a couple of friends I have from Greece, who loathe them.) THANK YOU for clarifying this! I have heard that many Albanians live illegally in Europe, so I can understand the feelings...of course this would be above board, legal work, so it's not really the same thing.

On your OP, I'd share your concerns and general unease. In particular, if someone was to live in my house and look after my children when they were young, I'd have wanted to know a lot about them first. And it would also have been very imprtant to me to be able to terminate the arrangement quickly and cleanly, if it's not working. It doesn't sound to me like you would feel you had that last freedom. From my searches, it seems that live in Canadian nannys are in very short supply, or way to young for me to feel comfortable with having. I'm sorry, but I'm not hiring anyone under 25. Just not going to happen, and that pretty much rules out Canuks. I may consider hiring someone who is here on a work visa already and would like to extend their stay...we'll see.


Does the university you'll be studying at have chidcare facilities?
It does. However, I don't want my kids to go to school in the city...and if they do, well, I might as well be living there and save ourselves the drive. Driving an hour in and an hour out with kids is hell. I've done it, and will avoid it at all costs. That drive is my decompression time, and it's sacred. Either they are cared for in our community, and I commute, or it just won't work.:(

Sounds to me like you're doing the Albanian a favor in getting them into Canada. Or out of Albania, anyway. Lay out the ground rules, the pros and cons of the job, and see what they say. Maybe even give them an open ticket back to Albania for the possibility that things don't work out.

But, wouldn't you rather have an interview with a nanny before you commit so much responsibility? There should be an agency that would offer up some choices. I can't believe the amount of paperwork this is going to entail. I become an employer, with responsibilities such as matching EI contributions, etc...they get a chance with a 2 year contract to apply for residency on their own, and there are protected under our labour laws...I do of course want to interview her extensively, but our rules are rather stringent (I mean Canada) for being able to enter as a live-in caregiver. I'm not sure she'll be meet those requirements. The more I look at this, the more complicated it seems...and if you go through an agency, you pay them about $1500 to deal with the headache. This is getting more and more costly!

Have you asked your parents about watching the kid(s)? My parents and in-laws would have been offended at the mention of moving a stranger into their home to take care of their grandkids.
My dad works out of town, and my mom just doesn't have the energy to watch my kids, every day, for three years. She helps when she can, but I'm not going to put that on her. And my inlaws...well...my mother in law already cares for 3 kids, plus babies the three adults living with her...two more is too much to ask. The rest of my family are too spread out to really help:(

I was raised by American nannies from the Northwest. It worked out pretty well for the family. They all had a one-year renewable contract. My mother only had problems with one out of five.

I can see the problems points 2 & 3 entail... They're probably not insurmountable, though. Regarding "culture shock"/displacement/unfamiliar setting for her, it's unpleasant at first (I speak from experience from having lived abroad), but you get used to it.

There'll undoubtedly be some headaches involved, but if it can avoid you some even bigger ones... ;)

You got a tough one to solve. That $1500 that you'd pay to an agency might look better and better as you get deeper into the paperwork. You need to be able to go to school and study without worrying about your kids care or about your employee. Paying "Nannies R Us" to take over the worries about the employee end might not be a bad decision.

You don't have a second cousin once removed or some other kind of distant relation that would take this as a job? Maybe not. Well, good luck to you.

I have so many cousins I could not even keep an accurate count:) However, one thing I've learned over the years is never to mix family and money. And I absolutely feel as though anyone caring for my children, family or otherwise, should be paid. Also, any family member willing to do this would still have to live with us, and the cousins I would consider have families of their own, and are settled...the ones who are not settled are not people I'd trust with children, frankly.

But you may be right about the paperwork fee being easier to just pay than going through the paperwork alone...I'm talking crazy paperwork. Live in caregivers are a special class (http://www.cic.gc.ca/english/pub/caregiver/index.html) of immigrants, and an already complicated process (immigration) is made more so by being part of this class. Now, some of this could be avoided were I able to find a Canadian willing to be a live-in, but a lot of this process remains the same regardless. Yuck! Maybe once I'm done my damn legal degree it would be simple...right now, with all the other things I have on the go, I'm not sure I'm up to it:(

Hmm, I think you're looking at this back-to-front. You'd save a fortune and loads of hassle if, instead of getting a nanny, you got rid of the children.

Try http://www.ebay.ca/; they even have a "baby" section.

Hmm, I think you're looking at this back-to-front. You'd save a fortune and loads of hassle if, instead of getting a nanny, you got rid of the children.

Try http://www.ebay.ca/; they even have a "baby" section.
That certainly would simplify things, wouldn't it! The money we'd save! The headaches!:D

But I'd want them back eventually...perhaps this is not the solution:(