NationStates Jolt Archive

Since everytime anything of substence (or not) happens to me I post it on the forum. It's time for me to share again. I MAY BE A FATHER. Holy Jesus-on-fucking-stick!

I can't be a father, I hate kids. My kids would grow up to be hetrosexual conservatives, just to spite me!

Fuckin' kids...

Since everytime anything of substence (or not) happens to me I post it on the forum. It's time for me to share again. I MAY BE A FATHER. Holy Jesus-on-fucking-stick!

I can't be a father, I hate kids. My kids would grow up to be hetrosexual conservatives, just to spite me!

Fuckin' kids...

Well, you may be a father, but you don't have to be a dad (unless you're married). It's up to you to decide how big of a role to play in their lives (again, assuming you're not married, which I'm fairly sure you're not). Me, I hate kids, but if I got a girl pregnant, I would help with child support, but not rearing the child.

Well, you may be a father, but you don't have to be a dad (unless you're married). It's up to you to decide how big of a role to play in their lives (again, assuming you're not married, which I'm fairly sure you're not). Me, I hate kids, but if I got a girl pregnant, I would help with child support, but not rearing the child.
Since this is one of the few issues I may have to give serious thought, I'll answer seriously.

This is probally where I stand. I'm in no way ready to be a "dad" or take on any of those roles. I have no intention of getting married and dispite hating kids, wouldn't want mine to grow up in a loveless marriage.

Of course I'd help out financially or whatever, but as for being a dad. I don't know. That's just not me.

Since this is one of the few issues I may have to give serious thought, I'll answer seriously.

This is probally where I stand. I'm in no way ready to be a "dad" or take on any of those roles. I have no intention of getting married and dispite hating kids, wouldn't want mine to grow up in a loveless marriage.

Of course I'd help out financially or whatever, but as for being a dad. I don't know. That's just not me.

Then it's simple. Don't be a dad. Give money to the kid, maybe be their friend, but not an authority figure. Just make sure you won't regret it later. Of course, I'm sure there're people who'll jump down my throat (and yours) for such advise, but it's not their life, nor their choice.

Since this is one of the few issues I may have to give serious thought, I'll answer seriously.

This is probally where I stand. I'm in no way ready to be a "dad" or take on any of those roles. I have no intention of getting married and dispite hating kids, wouldn't want mine to grow up in a loveless marriage.

Of course I'd help out financially or whatever, but as for being a dad. I don't know. That's just not me.

What line of work are you in? I grew up in a family business, so for us, each new kid was an extra employee.. you can always put him/her to work.. there's no child labor laws with family businesses.. It's cheap labor! :p

Then it's simple. Don't be a dad. Give money to the kid, maybe be their friend, but not an authority figure. Just make sure you won't regret it later. Of course, I'm sure there're people who'll jump down my throat (and yours) for such advise, but it's not their life, nor their choice.
Probally. But I seriously cannot see myself as any kind of dad. "That guy who gives mom money and rocks up every now and then for awkward conversation..." maybe.

Probally. But I seriously cannot see myself as any kind of dad. "That guy who gives mom money and rocks up every now and then for awkward conversation..." maybe.

Then, honestly, it sounds like you've already made up your mind. Just stick to your guns, and don't let people try to persuade you otherwise, unless you really feel you should.

What line of work are you in? I grew up in a family business, so for us, each new kid was an extra employee.. you can always put him/her to work.. there's no child labor laws with family businesses.. It's cheap labor! :p
I'm on the Board of Directors for my family business, but I don't work in it anymore. I am doing an assoicatship at a financial planning firm... so a kid isn't a great career move.

Hmm, well... it sucks to be you, man.... Of course, this could be a blessing in disguise, if the kid is born you may instantly fall in love with it (and that CAN happen) from basic parental instinct. This could be your choice to place a mark on the world, like peeing in the snow, only more permanent...

Congradulations...I guess. :confused:

Perhaps your attitude will change when the child is born.















Or not. :p

Oh, you breeders and your little problems. Amusing at times, annoying at others.

Fass, usually I enjoy reading your posts, but babies are much more than 'little problems'. Come on, man. You are more worthy than this post!

Rotovia, all I can say is good luck. This is a difficult situation you're in with no easy answers. I wish you the best.

Fass, usually I enjoy reading your posts, but babies are much more than 'little problems'. Come on, man. You are more worthy than this post!

Don't tell me you thought I was serious? Oh, dear, then I fear what you usually find enjoyable about my posts...

Don't tell me you thought I was serious? Oh, dear, then I fear what you usually find enjoyable about my posts...

Well, I honestly couldn't tell! :)


Sorry for calling you out on that - I should know better! :fluffle:

Well, I honestly couldn't tell! :)

While it is no secret that I think gay people superior, I can sympathise a bit with breeders and contraceptive mishaps, even if the contraceptives are used for actual contraception. ;)

Sorry for calling you out on that - I should know better! :fluffle:

Yeah, taking me seriously can be foolish. Let this be a lesson for all!

Well, first off, sorry about your luck. I hate kids too. Thats why I use birth control and contraceptives.

Second, if you don't take an active role in this kids life, your a worthless piece of shit. And don't use the "I used a condom, it's not my fault" excuse. My wife uses the pill, but if it failed, I wouldn't dodge my responsibilty to the kid because I hate kids! (and I REALLY hate kids!)

Third, Fass, what do your parents think of you, when you call hetorsexuals "breeders"? After all, they had to breed to have you, right? Does it bother you as much when heterosexuals call you a faggot?

While it is no secret that I think gay people superior, I can sympathise a bit with breeders and contraceptive mishaps, even if the contraceptives are used for actual contraception. ;)



Question, Fass.

If gays are superior, and we humands should aspire to be superior, doesn't that mean all people should be gay?

If that is true, how do we continue the species?

Third, Fass, what do your parents think of you, when you call hetorsexuals "breeders"? After all, they had to breed to have you, right? Does it bother you as much when heterosexuals call you a faggot?

"Yeah, taking me seriously can be foolish. Let this be a lesson for all!"

One would think that would be clear enough to convey that I wasn't being serious in any of the posts in this thread, but apparently not.

If gays are superior, and we humands should aspire to be superior, doesn't that mean all people should be gay?

All people can't be gay, nor can they aspire to be, so that's a bit moot. But it would be swell. Also refer to the lower part of that post about not taking things seriously in this thread, and what it makes of you if you do.

If that is true, how do we continue the species?

Like we've done so far? I wasn't aware that gay people were sterile to a higher degree than straight people.

"Yeah, taking me seriously can be foolish. Let this be a lesson for all!"

One would think that would be clear enough to convey that I wasn't being serious in any of the posts in this thread, but apparently not.
Well, I guess you should go post in the "stupid pointless joke" thread, instead of one that involves the beginning of a human beings life? Or does it not matter until you find out if they are worthy (read "gay") enough?

Well, I guess you should go post in the "stupid pointless joke" thread, instead of one that involves the beginning of a human beings life? Or does it not matter until you find out if they are worthy (read "gay") enough?

Oh, dear. Did I stop on your precious, little, sensitive toes? Boohoo. This a serious thread? It's by Rotovia! Look at the options in the poll. Now, please dismiss your fauxdignant self.

Oh, dear. Did I stop on your precious, little, sensitive toes? Boohoo. This a serious thread? It's by Rotovia! Look at the options in the poll. Now, please dismiss yourself.
His options in the poll don't give you permission to be an asshole! My toes aren't sensitive, so much as my instincts to protect kids. Especially from gay people who seem to think that all straight people are nothing more than "breeders" Go to some thread about cats if you want to give advice about raising a living being.

I think the real question here is:

How did a thread announcing fatherhood turn into a squabble between the gay and the straight?

Hmm, well... it sucks to be you, man.... Of course, this could be a blessing in disguise, if the kid is born you may instantly fall in love with it (and that CAN happen) from basic parental instinct. This could be your choice to place a mark on the world, like peeing in the snow, only more permanent...
I'd rather just pee in the snow...

I think the real question here is:

How did a thread announcing fatherhood turn into a squabble between the gay and the straight?
Because the "gay" in the thread thought it was funny to call straight people "breeders". I find that just as offensive as if someone would have called a gay person a "faggot". It's especially offensive considering the fact that said gay person goes crying to the Mods whenever someone uses the term "gay" in any way but positive.

Oh, you breeders and your little problems. Amusing at times, annoying at others.
Thank you Fass, that's the nicest thing you've ever said to me... which is concerning...:(

Because the "gay" in the thread thought it was funny to call straight people "breeders". I find that just as offensive as if someone would have called a gay person a "faggot". It's especially offensive considering the fact that said gay person goes crying to the Mods whenever someone uses the term "gay" in any way but positive.

:D

*looks like he's about to bust*

I really shouldn't say it.

I really shouldn't.

You dug a hole, and filled it with water, and now there's a plant growing from it. lulz.

I voted for everything because I can

Well, first off, sorry about your luck. I hate kids too. Thats why I use birth control and contraceptives.

Second, if you don't take an active role in this kids life, your a worthless piece of shit. And don't use the "I used a condom, it's not my fault" excuse. My wife uses the pill, but if it failed, I wouldn't dodge my responsibilty to the kid because I hate kids! (and I REALLY hate kids!)

Third, Fass, what do your parents think of you, when you call hetorsexuals "breeders"? After all, they had to breed to have you, right? Does it bother you as much when heterosexuals call you a faggot?
1) I normally do. Why I didn't is a loooong story not appropriate for the kiddies in here.
2) Oh...k, I'm still sticking with BARE MINIMUM parental duties.
3) I doubt Fass was born like you and me. I imagine him crawling out the bowels of Hell, or being thrown out because Satan was sick of being bullied by him.

1) I normally do. Why I didn't is a loooong story not appropriate for the kiddies in here.
2) Oh...k, I'm still sticking with BARE MINIMUM parental duties.
3) I doubt Fass was born like you and me. I imagine him crawling out the bowels of Hell, or being thrown out because Satan was sick of being bullied by him.
Just so you know, your one of my favorite people on NS general. I certainly don't agree with you on alot of issues, but I really respect the way you voice yourself, and the way you treat people with differing views with respect (well, those that deserve it, anyways.)
all I was trying to say was that when that little baby is born, it has NOTHING but Mom and DAD! I grew up without a Dad, and it will haunt me until I die! I just don't want to ever see that happen to anyone else. Besides, think of all the liberal stuff you can teach him so he can drive my kids crazy!:D
Either way, good luck, and I wish you nothing but the best!
.

His options in the poll don't give you permission to be an asshole!

But they did give me permission to take the piss. Really, the level of your fained indignation is starting to get laughable.

My toes aren't sensitive, so much as my instincts to protect kids.

Oh, seeing people blow smoke up their own ass like that sure is amusing.

Especially from gay people who seem to think that all straight people are nothing more than "breeders"

Again, taking me seriously about that seems to have rendered you just that which I told you it would - a fool. Really, now, stop before you strain yourself. I warned you this would happen.

Go to some thread about cats if you want to give advice about raising a living being.

And you should go to a thread where your mock indignation will make an impression on those feeble-minded enough to care about it.

I doubt Fass was born like you and me. I imagine him crawling out the bowels of Hell, or being thrown out because Satan was sick of being bullied by him.

I guess it's my turn to point out that that is the nicest thing you've written about me. :fluffle:

But they did give me permission to take the piss. Really, the level of your fained indignation is starting to get laughable..

It's not faigned. It's real indignation about a "homosexual" trying to tell me how to further the human race.


Oh, seeing people blow smoke up their own ass like that sure is amusing..
Well, if you had the ability to have kids, you'd understand.



Again, taking me seriously about that seems to have rendered you just that which I told you it would - a fool. Really, now, stop before you strain yourself. I warned you this would happen..
I take anyone who makes a joke of procreation seriously. Jealousy is an ugly thing. If only men had ovaries in their butts, you'd understand.



And you should go to a thread where your mock indignation will make an impression on those feeble-minded enough to care about it.
I don't care who (or "what") I make an impression on. I just like it to be known that gays calling me a "breeder" will NOT like the ways in which I seek retribution.

It's not faigned. It's real indignation about a "homosexual" trying to tell me how to further the human race.

Ah, so it is poorly cloaked homophobia that guides you in this sorry display. I wish I could say I was surprised.

Well, if you had the ability to have kids, you'd understand.

Yes, the ability to deposit spunk up someone's cloaca is a such a special one. I assure you, if people like Rotovia manage to do it, I could do it, too. Whenever I feel like it. Impregnating some bitch really is not something your heterosexuality has reserved as special for you.

I take anyone who makes a joke of procreation seriously.

Then you are rendered a fool.

Jealousy is an ugly thing. If only men had ovaries in their butts, you'd understand.

Yep, the poorly veiled homophobia is out of the bag, now. Nice to see your mock indignation subverted by yourself.

I don't care who (or "what") I make an impression on. I just like it to be known that gays calling me a "breeder" will NOT like the ways in which I seek retribution.

Oh, I shake in my stylish boots at your "retribution." The irony of being so obsessed with "procreation" and then at the same time conjuring together this little hissy fit over being called just what you seem to be would be exquisite, were it not for the fact that you are a fool for taking it seriously, just like I said. Run along now.

Ah, so it is poorly cloaked homophobia that guides you in this sorry display. I wish I could say I was surprised..I'm not homophobic. I don't mind homosexuals. I have a REALLY good friend who is gay. He's one od the nicest people I know! But I HATE gays who think they are better JUST because they like to stick there penis in another mans butt.




Yes, the ability to deposit spunk up someone's cloaca is a such a special one. I assure you, if people like Rotovia manage to do it, I could do it, too. Whenever I feel like it. Impregnating some bitch really is not something your heterosexuality has reserved as special for you..
You could, but apparently , you'd rather deposit it in someones colon. And BITCH? Thats just you showing your sexism, I guess?



Then you are rendered a fool..

By you? Damn, that stings, being called a fool by someone like you! ( not because your gay, but because your a complete bigotted moron.)


Yep, the poorly veiled homophobia is out of the bag, now. Nice to see your mock indignation subverted by yourself..

Again, my indignation is real. My homophobia is not. It's like calling a black man a racist. Not popular, but true none the less.


Oh, I shake in my stylish boots at your "retribution." The irony of being so obsessed with "procreation" and then at the same time conjuring together this little hissy fit over being called just what you seem to be would be exquisite, were it not for the fact that you are a fool for taking it seriously, just like I said. Run along now.I'll run along when I feel like it. You can't tell me what to do, regardless of what you think, I will let close minded people call me a homophobe, if it means defending myself against a closet bigot. BTW, you think you'd be used to "coming out" Might as well just come out and say that you hate straight people. It's already obvious


~EDIT~ Oh yeah. I love it how gays think they are SOOO cool because they "apparently " have the lock on fashion. It's................ FABULOUS!

I'm not homophobic. I don't mind homosexuals.

You just make homophobic statements and use homophobia to fuel your little hissy fit here.

I have a REALLY good friend who is gay. He's one od the nicest people I know!

Is this supposed to come across as silly as it does? "I can't be this, I have a friend who is that." You do realise that you are undermining your own putridly foolish "argumentation" in trying to call me a heterophobe through that? Maybe you should not only start reading what I've written, but also what you have wrtten yourself.

But I HATE gays who think they are better JUST because they like to stick there penis in another mans butt.

I really have to ask what specific part of "yeah, taking me seriously can be foolish" it is you cannot comprehend? Should I direct you to a dictionary? Would you fail to read that one as well?

You could, but apparently , you'd rather deposit it in someones colon.

Precisly. Or their face. Or throat. Or any part of their body. And in the future, I'll probably deposit in some friendly lesbian's vagina. See, it really isn't that special to deposit it somewhere, anywhere.

And BITCH? Thats just you showing your sexism, I guess?

No, that's me showing contempt for those that would bed you.

By you? Damn, that stings, being called a fool by someone like you! ( not because your gay, but because your a complete bigotted moron.)

I ask again what part of "yeah, taking me seriously can be foolish" it is you fail to understand.

Again, my indignation is real.

Your indignation is a sign of your foolishness.

My homophobia is not.

Your homophobia is a sign of poor breeding, ironically.

It's like calling a black man a racist. Not popular, but true none the less.

You keep telling yourself that and render yourself evermore the fool I warned you that you would become should you take my comment seriously.

I'll run along when I feel like it. You can't tell me what to do, regardless of what you think, I will let close minded people call me a homophobe, if it means defending myself against a closet bigot. BTW, you think you'd be used to "coming out" Might as well just come out and say that you hate straight people. It's already obvious.

The only obvious thing here is that you can't read, and that you let your homophobia fuel a hissy fit.

~EDIT~ Oh yeah. I love it how gays think they are SOOO cool because they "apparently " have the lock on fashion. It's................ FABULOUS!

It is. I know.

Your homophobia is a sign of poor breeding, ironically.

I was planning on keeping this debate going, but this comment is just over the line for me. You will NEVER get respect by insulting peoples familys. I didn't say that your parent's are failures for raising such a flaming faggot, did I? Did I ever suggest that they must have defective genes, or that you must have a history of mental retardation in your family? Did I say queers should all be gassed? NO, I didn't. I brought up points, while you saimply insulted my heritage. Well, fuck you. Your just pissed because I represent everything you hate, and I'm more excepted in society than you. Well, boo hoo. Live with it. BTW, you just made me like George Bush all the more. Another vote against you, sweety-pie!

Sweet Venus, Sick Nightmares, you are a fool. You're actually taking Fass seriously? It's FASS. And he even clearly stated that were anyone to take him seriously, they would be a fool. You have proven him correct. Bloody hell, some people will take personal offence at anything.

And Rotovia: Bad luck, sport. I'd spout some cliche about how this could be a 'blessing in disguise', but I don't actually believe that, so I won't say it. We all make mistakes sometimes, and hopefully this one won't arse things up for you too badly.

Sweet Venus, Sick Nightmares, you are a fool. You're actually taking Fass seriously? It's FASS. And he even clearly stated that were anyone to take him seriously, they would be a fool. You have proven him correct. Bloody hell, some people will take personal offence at anything.

.
I wouldn't take him seriously, but everytime someone uses the term "gay" in any way that isn't shining sunshine up his ass, he runs to the mod thread to cry. So it isn't ok when he jokes about me being a "breeder". If he wants to tell jokes, fine. But only when he can take one. Till then, I'll be on his ass like his boyfriend.

BTW, you just made me like George Bush all the more. Another vote against you, sweety-pie!

Again, you render yourself evermore the fool, because it really matters to me as a Swede whom some American fool votes for in his "society" that he is "more accepted in." Do run along now, like you should have from the beginning. It's painful to watch you degrade yourself like this.

If he wants to tell jokes, fine. But only when he can take one. Till then, I'll be on his ass like his boyfriend.

The difference being is that my boyfriend is adept at being on my ass, while you keep sliding off so incompetently.

Fass = THIS (http://redwing.hutman.net/%7Emreed/warriorshtm/crybaby.htm)

BTW, it does matter who I vote for, because my country is the one with THESE (http://www.boeing.com/defense-space/military/f22/flash.html) and THESE (http://fas.org/nuke/guide/usa/icbm/index.html)

I wouldn't take him seriously, but everytime someone uses the term "gay" in any way that isn't shining sunshine up his ass, he runs to the mod thread to cry. So it isn't ok when he jokes about me being a "breeder". If he wants to tell jokes, fine. But only when he can take one. Till then, I'll be on his ass like his boyfriend.

That's an exaggeration, and you know it. But even if it weren't, because someone does something stupid, you feel the need to be stupid too? You know what that results in, right? Yes, you guessed it: twice the stupidity. It's just spiteful and childish.

My kids would grow up to be hetrosexual conservatives, just to spite me!

and thats a bad thing because....... we do need heterosexuals to continue the human race you know.....

and whats wrong with conservatives.

Sorry Rotovia, we hijacked ya! I'm done. Good luck with everything!

Fass = THIS (http://redwing.hutman.net/%7Emreed/warriorshtm/crybaby.htm)

Again, that irony that would be so exquisite, had you not rendered yourself a fool.

BTW, it does matter who I vote for, because my country is the one with THESE (http://www.boeing.com/defense-space/military/f22/flash.html) and THESE (http://fas.org/nuke/guide/usa/icbm/index.html)

Military wanking? What are you, 14? "My country's dick is this long." I so laughed out loud at that.

Again, that irony that would be so exquisite, had you not rendered yourself a fool..
I did? I must have missed that while you were rendering yourself a heterophobic bigot. I'm done hijacking this thread. You can continue to if you feel it's your right. Goodnight. give your boyfriend a kiss for me!



Military wanking? What are you, 14? "My country's dick is this long." I so laughed out loud at that.
You asked me why you should care about my vote. I was simply showing you what my vote means on the international stage.

I did? I must have missed that while you were rendering yourself a heterophobic bigot. I'm done hijacking this thread. You can continue to if you feel it's your right. Goodnight. give your boyfriend a kiss for me!

Again, the failure to understand that simple sentence "yeah, taking me seriously can be foolish." I'd give my boyfriend a kiss from you, but I'm afraid of your illiteracy spreading.

You asked me why you should care about my vote. I was simply showing you what my vote means on the international stage.

Yeah, the US would nuke Europe, which has no nuclear weapons of its own (*snicker*). Sure. And your vote would matter in that. And the nuking would be connected with gay issues. And I should care about this delusion of yours.

You really are 14, aren't you?

Rotovia,

Let me give you a different perspective on this.

"Im not ready to be a parent" isnt going to mean much when this kid is old enough to wonder where you are.

I never knew my father, he wasnt ready either, or maybe he just didnt like kids.
I dont know.
Mom never collected child support from him, didnt want it.

Growing up, and not knowing who your father is, or never meeting him, isnt easy for a young man.
Sometimes, it can really alter a persons life.

If this kid is truly yours, you dont have just yourself to consider anymore.
It doesnt matter what you want, what matters is how you will conduct yourself in terms of being this kids father.
Wether you want to be a "dad" or not, this kid will wonder who, or where you are.
If you are man enough to make the baby..you should be man enough to be as much of a part of that kids life, as that kid needs you to be.

Any fool with working balls can become a father.
Only a man can have the courage to become a role model for his children.

The question is, what kind of man, do you want this kid to think you are?

Since everytime anything of substence (or not) happens to me I post it on the forum. It's time for me to share again. I MAY BE A FATHER. Holy Jesus-on-fucking-stick!

I can't be a father, I hate kids. My kids would grow up to be hetrosexual conservatives, just to spite me!

Fuckin' kids...

Well, I guess the question at this point is, would it be better for your child to grow up with a father who doesn't want him or her, or with no father at all? Neither is a good choice, it's just a question of which is the least bad.

And how does the mother feel about this? (If that matters at all to you. I note that nobody else has bothered to mention that this affects her a lot more than it affects you.)

I'll mention, just in passing, that I can't begin to comprehend your problem, because I love children and was overjoyed to become a father. I guess I'm just wired differently, because at a gut level, I just don't get it.

:confused:

Rotovia,

Let me give you a different perspective on this.
<Snip>
Very well said. Rotovia if you really are going to have a child, you need to at least be involved enough for the kid to know you & be able to rely on you.

Sure, the kid will turn out fine whether you're there or not, but that gaping hole inside isn't a joke.

It doesn't matter you're not around every day, and aren't overly involved in raising your child, but you need to be around. Otherwise you're a fucking wanker. And your kid will probably spend it's life being torn between living some fictional ideal & hating your guts.

Responsibility for your actions involves more than simply money in this case. But you don't have to be "Dad". Hopefully some other sucker will fill that role for you.

*hopes the hijacking is over*

we need details, rot. how involved are you with the prospective mother? is the child already here or only "on the way"?

get a paternity test. dont be mean about it but it protects your true interests in this child. i have seen far too many jerry springer episodes that feature a man who has paid child support for years only to find out that the child was never his at all. (there was even a case here in new mexico where a man had to pay 4 years of child support for a kid that didnt exist)

of course you hate kids, who doesnt? OTHER PEOPLES KIDS. nasty messy filthy little bags of disease. you will love your own child with an irrational intensity. dont shut yourself out of this experience. it will be good for you and good for your child. every child needs its father. no one is ready for it. we just think we are.

there is no experience that can compare to having a pretty little 2 year old girl squeal with delight when you come into view, throwing herself into your arms while calling you daddy. nothing compares to tucking your 3 year old son into bed, reading him a story, and having him say "i love you daddy" before he drifts off to sleep.

this child needs you. dont fail him.

Is termination/abortion an option?

If not, go with the joke option.

there is no experience that can compare to having a pretty little 2 year old girl squeal with delight when you come into view, throwing herself into your arms while calling you daddy.

And in no way did that sound at all paedophilic.

nothing compares to tucking your 3 year old son into bed, reading him a story, and having him say "i love you daddy" before he drifts off to sleep.

Why do kids call you daddy?:confused:

Why do kids call you daddy?:confused:
Perhaps it's similar to one of my mates youngest. She calls mom dad & vice versa. Odd but true.

Perhaps it's similar to one of my mates youngest. She calls mom dad & vice versa. Odd but true.

Maybe your friend is a transvestite? Married to another transvstite?

And in no way did that sound at all paedophilic.



Why do kids call you daddy?:confused:
why would it be pedophillic to love having your daughter be pleased to see you?

*smack* my son didnt call me daddy but rotovia's children will call him daddy.

why would it be pedophillic to love having your daughter be pleased to see you?

I said it didn't sound paedophilic. Guilty conscience?

*smack* my son didnt call me daddy but rotovia's children will call him daddy.

Well, if they find him, anyway. And if the US can't find Bin Laden, I would get their hopes up.

Maybe your friend is a transvestite? Married to another transvstite?
Hardly. I think a better bet would be that the girl was dropped on her head :p

It's a lot of fun mocking him with it though :D

I said it didn't sound paedophilic. Guilty conscience?

<insert snappy judge judy quote here>

dont play games with me

YOU are the one who brought up the idea of sounding pedophillic. i merely questioned why someone would ever think such a thing.

<insert snappy judge judy quote here>

dont play games with me

YOU are the one who brought up the idea of sounding pedophillic. i merely questioned why someone would ever think such a thing.

Guilty conscience?

Rotovia,

Let me give you a different perspective on this.

"Im not ready to be a parent" isnt going to mean much when this kid is old enough to wonder where you are.

I never knew my father, he wasnt ready either, or maybe he just didnt like kids.
I dont know.
Mom never collected child support from him, didnt want it.

Growing up, and not knowing who your father is, or never meeting him, isnt easy for a young man.
Sometimes, it can really alter a persons life.

If this kid is truly yours, you dont have just yourself to consider anymore.
It doesnt matter what you want, what matters is how you will conduct yourself in terms of being this kids father.
Wether you want to be a "dad" or not, this kid will wonder who, or where you are.
If you are man enough to make the baby..you should be man enough to be as much of a part of that kids life, as that kid needs you to be.

Any fool with working balls can become a father.
Only a man can have the courage to become a role model for his children.

The question is, what kind of man, do you want this kid to think you are?
Honestly, it sounds like you're trying to guilt-trip him. He said he'd pay financial support and the like, which is more than he's required to do, m'thinks.

If he doesn't think he'll make a good parental figure, then maybe he has no business being one? The mother would have every chance of marrying and finding a perfectly good and willing male to fill the role as a dad, without any damage to the kid.

The whole "be a man" thing is ridiculous. I say he's being quite a "man" for having the courage to make the difficult decision as to the role he'll play in the child's life. More responsible than the "Shit, I got a girl pregnant, I guess I should be a dad" response in which you do it because you feel obligated, not because you want to, and more responsible than the "Damn it, girl's pregnant, gotta run" response.

... I'm kind of having trouble imagining... uh... :eek:

My advice: enjoy the nine months of freedom you have left, and then follow the advice of everyone else in this thread.

Honestly, it sounds like you're trying to guilt-trip him. He said he'd pay financial support and the like, which is more than he's required to do, m'thinks.

If he doesn't think he'll make a good parental figure, then maybe he has no business being one? The mother would have every chance of marrying and finding a perfectly good and willing male to fill the role as a dad, without any damage to the kid.

The whole "be a man" thing is ridiculous. I say he's being quite a "man" for having the courage to make the difficult decision as to the role he'll play in the child's life. More responsible than the "Shit, I got a girl pregnant, I guess I should be a dad" response in which you do it because you feel obligated, not because you want to, and more responsible than the "Damn it, girl's pregnant, gotta run" response.

That's some nice work, LGD.

... I'm kind of having trouble imagining... uh... :eek:

My advice: enjoy the nine months of freedom you have left, and then follow the advice of everyone else in this thread.

Cloning machines, here comes Rotovia

Honestly, it sounds like you're trying to guilt-trip him. He said he'd pay financial support and the like, which is more than he's required to do, m'thinks.

If he doesn't think he'll make a good parental figure, then maybe he has no business being one? The mother would have every chance of marrying and finding a perfectly good and willing male to fill the role as a dad, without any damage to the kid.

The whole "be a man" thing is ridiculous. I say he's being quite a "man" for having the courage to make the difficult decision as to the role he'll play in the child's life. More responsible than the "Shit, I got a girl pregnant, I guess I should be a dad" response in which you do it because you feel obligated, not because you want to, and more responsible than the "Damn it, girl's pregnant, gotta run" response.

no, financial support and the like is NOT more than hes required to do. as the father, he has legal and moral responsibilty to support any children he has. the state will insist on it.

he should give it a try. parenthood is something you cant know how youll feel about until the baby is actually here. (thats why an adoptive mother cant reliquish her baby until after is born in most jurisdictions). if he finds he hates the baby or doesnt care one way or the other AND the mother has another man who is willing to adopt, then he can make that decision.

he does need to "be a man" he has responsibilities whether he wants them or not.

Since everytime anything of substence (or not) happens to me I post it on the forum. It's time for me to share again. I MAY BE A FATHER. Holy Jesus-on-fucking-stick!MAY BE??? she cheating on you? demand a DNA test then. oh and Congrats... I think.
I can't be a father, I hate kids. My kids would grow up to be hetrosexual conservatives, just to spite me! usually it's in the Teen years where they start doing things to spite you... ;)
Fuckin' kids... hope not, there is an age of consent you know... :D

no, financial support and the like is NOT more than hes required to do. as the father, he has legal and moral responsibilty to support any children he has. the state will insist on it.

he should give it a try. parenthood is something you cant know how youll feel about until the baby is actually here. (thats why an adoptive mother cant reliquish her baby until after is born in most jurisdictions). if he finds he hates the baby or doesnt care one way or the other AND the mother has another man who is willing to adopt, then he can make that decision.

he does need to "be a man" he has responsibilities whether he wants them or not.

I stand corrected, thank you.

You can have a very good idea about parenthood if you know for a fact you're bad around kids, or you absolutely hate the kids. I'm of the latter camp, though I take wonderful care of children when asked to babysit by relatives.

As horrid as it may sound, he's not obligated to stick around. He's fulfilled his biological purpose (though this could be argued that he shouldn't have, since the world's overpopulated...or that he's Rotovia, hehe, but that's neither here nor there). The only thing he's obligated to do is to pay child support, which he said he would, if I recall properly. Difficult as it may well be to be a single mother, it's certainly not impossible, and I would wager far easier with a dad paying money for the child. In addition, as I stated, she would not be hard pressed to find a male willing to step in as a parental figure, nor should he be required to wait till that happened.

What I meant by the whole "being a man" bit was referring to the insistance of people that he act the role of a dad and not just a person paying child support.

And thank you, Heron.

Cloning machines, here comes Rotovia
Exactly...

Exactly...

But then what happens when they all fuck their lives up?

Fass and Sick Nightmares: I see that the argument between both of you ended; however, I would strongly advise that both of you do not take the argument back up again, especially you Sick Nightmares, seeing as Fass said a joke and wasn't being serious whatsoever. You need to lay back for a minute.

Since everytime anything of substence (or not) happens to me I post it on the forum. It's time for me to share again. I MAY BE A FATHER. Holy Jesus-on-fucking-stick!

I can't be a father, I hate kids. My kids would grow up to be hetrosexual conservatives, just to spite me!

Fuckin' kids...
Was your first reaction to tell US about it?

Since everytime anything of substence (or not) happens to me I post it on the forum. It's time for me to share again. I MAY BE A FATHER. Holy Jesus-on-fucking-stick!

I can't be a father, I hate kids. My kids would grow up to be hetrosexual conservatives, just to spite me!

Fuckin' kids...
Just pretend it's a puppy.

Since everytime anything of substence (or not) happens to me I post it on the forum. It's time for me to share again. I MAY BE A FATHER. Holy Jesus-on-fucking-stick!

I can't be a father, I hate kids. My kids would grow up to be hetrosexual conservatives, just to spite me!

Fuckin' kids...


Well first off i have three words for ya, Get the Snip. That would mean you could never ever ever have kids (unless you had the op to fix it).

Second, You dont need to be a "father" be an uncle so your still involved in the kids life but not involved to the point of being a father.

Third, does she want the kid? have you spoken to her? that should be the vary first move. Failing that push her down the stairs and destroy the cells growin inside her (its not a living baby till it has a brain, heart and kicks the women from the inside), just kidding dont push her down the stairs (tho you could if you wanted to.)

Failing the top three start a religion where its agenst the laws of your god(s) to be a father in any shape way or form and get a bunch of followers (male and female).

Second, You dont need to be a "father" be an uncle

Unless you live in Alabama.

Unless you live in Alabama.

well thankfully i live in the UK, and Rotovia- welldone your a credit to all man kind. I give you another bit of pointless advice....the first words of the Hich hikers gide to the Galaxy DONT PANIC.

well thankfully i live in the UK, and Rotovia- welldone your a credit to all man kind. I give you another bit of pointless advice....the first words of the Hich hikers gide to the Galaxy DONT PANIC.

You don't live in Cornwall, do you? Or the Isle of Mann? They're almost as bad, except for the part of Cornwall I used to live in. But that was barely in Cornwall, so I'm okay.

Or at least, don't hate me for that reason.

no, financial support and the like is NOT more than hes required to do. as the father, he has legal and moral responsibilty to support any children he has. the state will insist on it.

he should give it a try. parenthood is something you cant know how youll feel about until the baby is actually here. (thats why an adoptive mother cant reliquish her baby until after is born in most jurisdictions). if he finds he hates the baby or doesnt care one way or the other AND the mother has another man who is willing to adopt, then he can make that decision.

he does need to "be a man" he has responsibilities whether he wants them or not.

He doesn't want to BE a father. Believe me, I speak from experience here, no father is infinitely better than a father who doesn't want to be a father. If he listens to your advice, that kid will have a hell of a childhood. And the mother will not have it easy with him, either.
He's ready to pay, which is a good thing, and which should be the only thing required from him. Everything else is his own choice.
Now give him a rest, will you?

He doesn't want to BE a father. Believe me, I speak from experience here, no father is infinitely better than a father who doesn't want to be a father. If he listens to your advice, that kid will have a hell of a childhood. And the mother will not have it easy with him, either.
He's ready to pay, which is a good thing, and which should be the only thing required from him. Everything else is his own choice.
Now give him a rest, will you?
no i wont

there are some doors you shouldnt bar shut. he'll know soon enough if he wants to be a father. once the baby is born the reality of that little life in his arms will let him know almost immediately.

until then, he shouldnt shut out the possibility of the most wonderful relationship he will ever have.

babies are much more than 'little problems'.Bloody right. They're gargantuan, horrid problems. Rotovia, can you not persuade the girl to get rid of the thing? Good luck in resolving this nightmare; you have my sympathy.

To all those people going on about how hard life without a father is: I grew up without mine and I am very, very glad of it. This may well not be true of Rotovia's possible brat, but my point is that not everyone has, or will have, the same views.

There are pros and cons to both sides here. Your involvement might be to the child's benefit or detriment depending on how well you do your job. My eldest's "donor" (he certainly doesn't qualify as a father or dad) initially decided he wanted nothign to do with us, then when the child was 10 he wanted to see her, then after almost a year of visiting he decided to disappear again. So my advice is, make whichever decision you like, just MAKE SURE YOU STICK TO IT!! Nothing is worse for a kid than instability.

Like i said "push/Trip" her down a flgiht of stairs, its the old fasion way of getting rid of the cells inside her (depending on how meny weeks gone she is) its not hard, she trips and you go "oh sorry shit are you ok, im acting all concerned so you dont blame me, why did i rush down the stairs and maby make you trip oh i was running to have a Cig stressful day, oh ya i dont smoke well i just took it up blablabla".


See this is a good Safe Sex Add, Dont have Safe Sex and get a screaming Brat that will cost you a minimum of 12,000 per year. Yes 12,000 per year and thats on the cheap side and kids are not cheap, you may make them for free but you pay for it in more ways then you knew. (sleepless nights, a hormonal Teenager at some point and well we all know what happens).

There are pros and cons to both sides here. Your involvement might be to the child's benefit or detriment depending on how well you do your job. My eldest's "donor" (he certainly doesn't qualify as a father or dad) initially decided he wanted nothign to do with us, then when the child was 10 he wanted to see her, then after almost a year of visiting he decided to disappear again. So my advice is, make whichever decision you like, just MAKE SURE YOU STICK TO IT!! Nothing is worse for a kid than instability.
excellent point!

the utterly worst thing a non-custodial dad can do is come and go from his child's life. it wreaks havoc with a childs self esteem, sense of self worth, sense of justice itself.

just the thought of a child waiting night after night for daddys phone call that never comes and being all packed up to go away on their normal weekend together but daddy never shows up. *shudder* then after the child finally decides that daddy is never gonna call, he shows back up just long enough to make the child believe in him again.

those are the kids who grow up to be severely screwed up adults.

Who's My Daddy?!
Darth Drive2: Me, It Turns Out......

Darth Drive2: Obi Wan never told you what happened to your father.

Rotovia: He told me enough! He told me you killed him!

Darth Drive2: No, Luke... I am your father!

Rotovia: No. It can't be. That's not true. That's impossible!

Darth Drive2: Search your feelings Luke... you know them to be true.

Rotovia: NOOoooo!

Darth Drive2: Yes, it is true... and you know what else? You know that brass droid of yours?

Rotovia: Threepio?

Darth Drive2:Yes... Threepio... I built him... when I was 7 years old.

Rotovia: No! ... Wait, huh?

Darth Drive2: Seven years old. And what have you done? Look at yourself. No hand. No job. And you couldn't even levitate your own ship out of the swamp...

Rotovia: But... I destroyed your precious Death Star!

Darth Vader2: But that was when you were 20! When I was 10, I single-handedly destroyed an entire Trade Federation Droid Control ship!

Rotovia: Well, it's not my fault...

Darth Vader2: Oh, here we go... "Poor me... my father never gave me what I wanted for my birthday... boo hoo, my daddy's the Dark Lord of the Sith... Nobody loved me... waahhh wahhh!"

Rotovia: Shut up!

Darth Vader2: You're a slacker! By the time I was your age, I had already exterminated the Jedi knights!

Rotovia: I used to race my T-16 through Beggar's Canyon.

Darth Vader2: Oh, for the love of the Emperor... 10 years old, winner of the Boonta Eve Open... the Only human to ever fly a Pod Racer... right here baby!

*Rotovia looks down the shaft. Takes a step towards it.*

Darth Vader2: I was wrong... You're not my kid... I don't know whose you are, but you sure ain't mine.

*Rotovia takes a step off the platform, hesitates, then plunges down the shaft.*

*Darth Vader2 looks down after him.*

Darth Vader2: And get a haircut!

Little childen are truly abhorrent creatures, I'm only 16 atm but I cant stand infants now, and never want children in my life. I know this is selfish but if only one could dispense with a child until the age of 11-13, and then rear it, since you acquire the pleasurably aspect of parenting, and not the sacrifice.

Seriously though, take as little role in their lives as possible, I would.

if only one could dispense with a child until the age of 11-13, and then rear it, since you acquire the pleasurably aspect of parenting, and not the sacrifice.

You think raising a teenager is the fun part? Does that seem absurd to anyone else?

Of course, I'm looking at it as having just stopped being an asshole teenager myself. Most teenagers push the boundaries as hard as they can. You really think it's fun to be a parent of a teenager? You so crazy...

Just so you know, your one of my favorite people on NS general. I certainly don't agree with you on alot of issues, but I really respect the way you voice yourself, and the way you treat people with differing views with respect (well, those that deserve it, anyways.)
all I was trying to say was that when that little baby is born, it has NOTHING but Mom and DAD! I grew up without a Dad, and it will haunt me until I die! I just don't want to ever see that happen to anyone else. Besides, think of all the liberal stuff you can teach him so he can drive my kids crazy!:D
Either way, good luck, and I wish you nothing but the best!
.
Cheers. I never knew my dad either, probally why I'm so screwed up. But the idea of an evil army of super-liberals is appealing to me... *evil*

Honestly, it sounds like you're trying to guilt-trip him. He said he'd pay financial support and the like, which is more than he's required to do, m'thinks.[quote]

Its not a question of guilt.
Its a question of responsibilty.
Financial support is the very least he should do.
However, if this child is his, then he isnt just responsible for himself anymore, is he?
It would be nice if we could only have as much repsonsibility in life, as we think we are capable of handling, but life doesnt work like that.
There are reprocussions to our actions, and birth, is a potential reprocussion of sex.


[quote]If he doesn't think he'll make a good parental figure, then maybe he has no business being one? The mother would have every chance of marrying and finding a perfectly good and willing male to fill the role as a dad, without any damage to the kid.

It really doesnt matter if a person thinks they will or wont be a good parent, once you have a child...you become one.
There are alternatives, but those arent really up to the father usually.
In this case, he should be, as anyone should be, as much of a father, as the childs mother allows you to be, assuming the mother and father are not a couple.

The whole "be a man" thing is ridiculous. I say he's being quite a "man" for having the courage to make the difficult decision as to the role he'll play in the child's life. More responsible than the "Shit, I got a girl pregnant, I guess I should be a dad" response in which you do it because you feel obligated, not because you want to, and more responsible than the "Damn it, girl's pregnant, gotta run" response.

Being a good person involves taking responsibilty for your fuck-ups.
When something like this happens, its no longer your own fate, you are deciding.
By ignoring one's own child, youre probably going to do some damage to the child's pyche.
If that is the sort of thing anyone thinks is fine and dandy, that doesnt make them a very good person, IMHO.

Little childen are truly abhorrent creatures, I'm only 16 atm but I cant stand infants now, and never want children in my life. I know this is selfish but if only one could dispense with a child until the age of 11-13, and then rear it, since you acquire the pleasurably aspect of parenting, and not the sacrifice.

Seriously though, take as little role in their lives as possible, I would.

I don't see that as selfish at all. You don't want kids, you don't have them and leave the resources to somebody else's brats.... sounds fair to me.
The most selfish people in my book are those who absolutely want kids, no matter what the cost. Not adopt them, mind, but give birth to them themselves. How can you get more selfish than that?

But to the point : If a mother doesn't want to be a mother, she has an abortion and everything is sorted out and fine. Why should a father be forced (legally or morally) to look after offspring he didn't want in the first place?

Personally, I find babies disgusting. Really. And that wouldn't be any different if it were my own, it might actually be worse. If he doesn't like kids either, what on earth gives you the idea he might be a good father or in any way beneficial for the child???

I don't see that as selfish at all. You don't want kids, you don't have them and leave the resources to somebody else's brats.... sounds fair to me.
The most selfish people in my book are those who absolutely want kids, no matter what the cost. Not adopt them, mind, but give birth to them themselves. How can you get more selfish than that?

But to the point : If a mother doesn't want to be a mother, she has an abortion and everything is sorted out and fine. Why should a father be forced (legally or morally) to look after offspring he didn't want in the first place?

Personally, I find babies disgusting. Really. And that wouldn't be any different if it were my own, it might actually be worse. If he doesn't like kids either, what on earth gives you the idea he might be a good father or in any way beneficial for the child???

Oh I agree. I think the father should have the option to terminate the pregnancy too. (Seriously).

Oh I agree. I think the father should have the option to terminate the pregnancy too. (Seriously).

I'm not really sure about that... something doesn't feel right about it.
But I would agree that the father shouldn't be forced to pay for the child if he doesn't want any contact with it anyway.

I'm not really sure about that... something doesn't feel right about it.
But I would agree that the father shouldn't be forced to pay for the child if he doesn't want any contact with it anyway.

Yeah, but then the kid likely ends up growing up in poverty, or being a ward of the state.

It's harsh, but fair.

Silly boy.
http://www.mojonation.ca/mojoforums2004/images/smilies/lets_do_it_wild.gif

What's wrong with abortion?

If it's too late, and you're not too attached to the mother... Buy a plane ticket to somewhere that doesn't have an extradition treaty to where you live (Oz, isn't it?). Then arrange to take the mother on a little trip, a long weekend or something. Driving in the countryside would be ideal. Make sure it's known you'll be incommunicado for a few days.
Now, kill her, and dispose of the body somewhere nice and out of the way. Make sure it won't be found for a while.
Next, hop on the plane, and before anybody's the wiser and Interpol are after you you've got a second hand identity in your new home country!

Might need a bit of refinement, but I think the basic plan's good. Did I mention I rather dislike children, too?

I don't see that as selfish at all. You don't want kids,
Get sterilised!
How complex is this? "I don't want to breed, I'll make sure I can't!" As opposed to, "I don't want to breed, so I'll just take the chance that any time I have sex the contraceptive may fail or (as in this case) not use a contraceptive and hope for the best!" Then bitch, moan and complain that you never wanted to be a parent!
Although I suppose it is unreasonable of me to expect someone so irresponsible that they would abandon their own child to behave in a responsible fashion as regards their own sexual functions.

Get sterilised!
How complex is this? "I don't want to breed, I'll make sure I can't!" As opposed to, "I don't want to breed, so I'll just take the chance that any time I have sex the contraceptive may fail or (as in this case) not use a contraceptive and hope for the best!" Then bitch, moan and complain that you never wanted to be a parent!
Although I suppose it is unreasonable of me to expect someone so irresponsible that they would abandon their own child to behave in a responsible fashion as regards their own sexual functions.

Hey - so far, I have never been pregnant. And I have though about getting the operation, but first of all, it IS costly, and second my doctor advised against it at the moment.
But thanks for calling me irresponsible....
Oh, and btw, you completely missed my point.

It really doesnt matter if a person thinks they will or wont be a good parent, once you have a child...you become one.
There are alternatives, but those arent really up to the father usually.
In this case, he should be, as anyone should be, as much of a father, as the childs mother allows you to be, assuming the mother and father are not a couple.

this is the only part of your post that i have a problem with.

just as the father cannot abdicate all responsibility for his child, (unless both parents agree to adopt it out to another family), the mother has no right to keep him from being the father he wants to be.

the courts will enforce custody and visitation. they will prevent the mother from moving out of state in order to avoid the fathers visitation. if he can demonstrate himself to be a good father, and the mother falls into bad circumstances, he can get physical custody (as opposed to her having her parents raise the child)

her feelings in the matter have no bearing. its the fathers desire to be involved (or not) in his childs life that counts.

Oh I agree. I think the father should have the option to terminate the pregnancy too. (Seriously).

Hmm, interesting, the abortion method would be interesting.

Get sterilised!
How complex is this? "I don't want to breed, I'll make sure I can't!" As opposed to, "I don't want to breed, so I'll just take the chance that any time I have sex the contraceptive may fail or (as in this case) not use a contraceptive and hope for the best!" Then bitch, moan and complain that you never wanted to be a parent!
Although I suppose it is unreasonable of me to expect someone so irresponsible that they would abandon their own child to behave in a responsible fashion as regards their own sexual functions.That's all very well assuming you can get sterilised. I don't know about Rotovia, or where he's from, but here they simply won't do it until you're at least 25 or have had loads of brats already. Well, they will - if you're prepared to fork out c. £500 (last time I looked). Which seems kind of daft when you can get a 99.9% reliable method of contraception for free and with ease (the pill is free from the doctor, and condoms from family planning clinics). Besides, there are some people who do want to bear children in the future, but not at the point in question. Ultimately, if you don't want a kid at a given point, you may not give it the best upbringing you could - so it's good neither for it, nor for you.

I fully intend to get steralised as soon as I'm 25 (I'm presently 22), but I don't see why I should have to go pay so much at this stage for what I see as my basic right and decision to not procreate. Neither do I see why I should abstain from an enjoyable activity that the majority of couples in love engage in just because there is a 0.1% chance that there may be a vile consequence of it. There is a risk (probably higher than the risk that protected sex will lead to pregnancy) that, when I walk down the street, someone may shoot/mug/rape/whatever me, but that doesn't stop me (nor, I'm sure, the vast majority of people) from leaving the house.

this is the only part of your post that i have a problem with.

just as the father cannot abdicate all responsibility for his child, (unless both parents agree to adopt it out to another family), the mother has no right to keep him from being the father he wants to be.

the courts will enforce custody and visitation. they will prevent the mother from moving out of state in order to avoid the fathers visitation. if he can demonstrate himself to be a good father, and the mother falls into bad circumstances, he can get physical custody (as opposed to her having her parents raise the child)

her feelings in the matter have no bearing. its the fathers desire to be involved (or not) in his childs life that counts.


Most of the courts where I live, wont enforce visitations, unless the mother wishes them to be.
Ultimately, it's the mothers choice to have even child support payments enforced.
Sometimes, like in my own case, my mother never asked for any support, although she could have, even though we moved to another state, after I was born.

I could be wrong, but I dont think a court can make a father spend time with his children if the father is completely unwilling to do so.
I think all they can do, is ensure support payments are made, by taking the money directly out of a persons paychecks.

However, if a father demands visitation, they courts usually see that this is done.

Most of the courts where I live, wont enforce visitations, unless the mother wishes them to be.
Ultimately, it's the mothers choice to have even child support payments enforced.
Sometimes, like in my own case, my mother never asked for any support, although she could have, even though we moved to another state, after I was born.

I could be wrong, but I dont think a court can make a father spend time with his children if the father is completely unwilling to do so.
I think all they can do, is ensure support payments are made, by taking the money directly out of a persons paychecks.

However, if a father demands visitation, they courts usually see that this is done.
of course it depends on jurisdiction and even on the judge that hears the case but these days courts will enforce visitation. they will also go the further step of preventing a custodial parent from taking the child out of the state or out of the country. (it may be a rule that a parent can never take a minor child out of the country without the express permission of the other parent)

no, the courts cant force a father to actually paricipate in his childrens' lives. allthey can do is to ensure that he can have visitation regardless of the mother's wishes.

but only if the father pushes the issue in court.